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The job of a therapist is multifaceted.

They have to be excellent and active listeners. They must be masters at holding space for people that need a safe zone to spill it all.

They must know when to interject and push a behavior change, and when to let the client discover the need for change on their own.


So it really is quite rare that a therapist actually makes the move to give advice to a client. It's usually a careful decision to intervene when all other therapeutic approaches haven't yielded results.

Unfortunately, it doesn't always do the trick. In fact, one recent Reddit thread asked people about the times their therapists gave truly terrible advice--so bad it left the patient scratching their head about whether to continue on the following week.

taiwanna asked, "What is the worst advice a therapist has given you?"

Never Good to Guilt Trip the Patient

"I give you a safe place to cry and you don't cry."

"I have bipolar and this was after my husband died. I was in a mixed episode. Because of my meds I seldom cry. It was as if she expected me to cry on cue."

-- Think-Anywhere-7751

Tough to Prove

"A 'therapist' once told my friend the reason why she fought so much with her sister was because they were enemies in a past life, reunited to solve their problem." -- TunyG

"What the actual f***? Surely this wasn't a licensed professional. If so, I imagine they lost their license soon after."

"Hopefully." -- Basgerin

Chances are it is NOT Pokemon

"My first childhood therapist thought that Pokemon was the root of all of my problems. Turns out the root of all of my problems was severe childhood trauma." -- mouthwordpasta

"I'm so sorry to hear that Pikachu mistreated you that way." -- kirotheavenger

"Omg! Mine said rap music was my problem. Hahahaa! Not all the trauma or death of my father... no rap music was my problem. 🤦♀️🤦♀️" -- Andandromeda3821

Only One Way Out

"I had a therapist who really, really insisted that I have to believe in a higher power of some sort. Yeah, I know that has proven positive effects for some people."

"Doesn't mean it works for me. Plus I'm not just suddenly going to start believing in something I haven't for decades, so can we move on, please?"

-- sterlingphoenix

Heather, the Nonbeliever 

"I had one tell my homophobic parents during family therapy 'Don't worry, a lot of teenage girls think they're bisexual. She'll pick a side before she's 21'"

"I'm almost 22 and still haven't 'picked a side', so f*** you Heather."

-- rayqueerza

An Extremely Morbid Approach

"One therapist asked me what I wanted for myself. I said I wanted peace. She said: You will have peace in the grave." -- wintersweet05

"W H A T" -- DaktiloTuna

"what the actual—" -- thatonebandgeek

Seems Like a Personal Choice

"'You need to have another baby'" -- sidewhiner

"Wtf, a therapist said that? Like an actual f***ing therapist? Bruuuuuuh" -- Cheese_globe

"How was that supposed to help you?? 'Here, have another responsibility and more stress. That will solve everything.'" -- bookishweirdo

Just Stop Being You, Okay?

"Stop being sad and speak to people...im depressed with social anxiety and autism" -- DuplicateSolace

"I once had a therapist tell me I should go to events alone, and start talking to randomers, when I told her I might have social anxiety. Stopped seeing her after that comment.." -- theantonia

Sure Fire Way to Explode Later On

"To keep my feelings to myself in order to not cause problems with my family." -- Sigridhavorrk

"f***ing YIKES" -- ThermonuclearCream

"Bottle it up lol duh"

"I mean, really, how did these people get certified? They're teaching the exact opposite things to do. Even I know you don't do that, and I'm f***ing stupid." -- Basgerin

The Least Fun Fact 

"Saw a therapist because of my OCD."

"Told her I had to make my bed every morning in a very particular way, and, in an attempt to get me to 'break that habit' she decided to tell me that 'actually, making your bed traps all the germs in your sheets, which is actually way more gross, so it's better to not.'"

"Result: I was both scared to make my bed and not make my bed. Great."

-- QueenDenjamin

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Image by salmerf from Pixabay

Stupid is as stupid does. And it’s pretty obvious when some poor, misinformed, potentially ignorant soul needs to be put in their place. Luckily, there are a lot of witty ways to do just that. We love a good euphemism.

Wanna know the best way to call out stupidity when you see it? Stay tuned.

U/lientubay asked: What's the best euphemism for telling people that they're stupid?

​Get a load of these sick burns. I swear, the people of Reddit are harsh.

Call outs are a universal language.

In Russian we have "intelligent thoughts have always followed him, but he was faster".

Humphr1es

We have something similar in German: "Intelligence is chasing you, but you are faster."

Tatsukishi

Be your own Easter Bunny.​

Looney Tunes Cartoon GIF Giphy

You could hide your own Easter eggs.

Bdiz78

The great Harvey Korman had some Alzheimer's @ 2005, and he still went on a talk show. They asked him how he was doing and he said he was OK. "Now I can hide my own Easter eggs." RIP.

Gas-Blaster

That’s cold.​

“At this point, you can only impress me."

Roman_Suicide_Note

This reminds me of something I saw in a show recently. One character said "Would you think less of me if ____." The other character said "I could never think less of you."

Catty_wampus

​I lol’d.

I think I saw this one here previously "You aren't the biggest idiot in the world but you better hope they don't die".

Soalindie

Once told this to my brother, his immediate response was "hey, please don't die".

Srakrn

It takes a very intelligent person to properly call out a dumb person. Weird how that works, huh?​

When the bears are smarter than the tourists.​

GIF by Smokey Bear Giphy

Now I know what Douglas Adams was talking about.

"A common mistake that people make when trying to design something completely foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity of complete fools."

BerenTheBold

As the park rangers in Yellowstone say- making a bear-proof trash can is very difficult due to the considerable overlap between the smartest bears and the dumbest tourists.

Lahmmom

​That’s a gross mental image.

In Greece we say "when it was raining brains, you had an umbrella".

GSavvage

In German we ask God for help. "God, let there be raining brains" this sounds so weird but idk how to express it better lol.

Edit: In German it's "Gott, lass Hirn regnen".

Foxpawdot

It’s probably a bad sign when your lawyer calls you dumb.

Lawyer to client who shared detailed attorney-client privileged strategy memorandum with a whole bunch of people, including an adverse party:

Client: "Is there anything you can do to fix this?"

Attorney: "No, you've pretty much waived the privilege and now they know everything."

Client: "Is there anyway to put a positive spin on this?"

Attorney: "Well, I suppose the judge might buy that this proves that you lack the mental capacity to form specific intent."

Malibulobo

These next ones are just plain cold, but probably very much deserved.​

Meanness from a Canadian is probably well-earned.

eric cartman GIF by South Park Giphy

On a Canadian jobsite

Ahh Terry, having you around is like losing three good men.

StrykerSeven

Oof, that’s harsh.

He's so far behind he thinks he's first.

Perstn

I had a keychain as a kid that said, "She who laughs last thinks slowest.”

KatieSedai

Those are some gross socks.

Once heard someone say "Well he's about as sharp as a sock full of soup".

Angrypunishment

"Sharp as a marshmallow" was one that went around my friend circle.

Rubywolf27

In the words of the great prophets Smash Mouth, “I ain’t the sharpest tool in the shed”. That self-burn is perhaps one of the most classic euphemisms. And I just almost misspelled “euphemism”. So I can definitely relate to that lyric.

A good way to exercise your brain? Keep thinking of creative ways to insult people. Trust me, it works like a charm

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