Traditionally speaking, when we think of proposals when it comes to hetero couples, it's pretty much always the man who proposes to the woman. We see it in movies, TV, internet specials, read it in books - there really aren't a lot of examples that most people can think of (aside from arranged marriages) where there is any deviation from that. He proposes to her. That's it.
But what if that wasn't it?
With more and more male celebrities rocking engagement rings (Ed Sheeran, Michael Buble, David Otunga, Osi Umenyiora) and tons of couples ditching the idea of gold and diamonds entirely, younger people are all about chucking traditions out the window and doing it their own way. So let's talk about this whole proposal thing...
Reddit user That-Guy-Jack asked:
Women who proposed to your boyfriend, how did they react when you were the one to pop the question?
It turns out young people who have switched it up aren't exactly being pioneers in the proposal territory. There were some couples who responded and had been married for literal decades! Some of these responses had to be edited for language, but here are people's real-life proposal stories. Enjoy!
Forgot To Answer
He was pretty taken aback, and said it was the nicest thing anyone has ever done for him. Then I reminded him he hadn't answered the question yet, and he said yes.
The Song
Giphy
He said he had to think about it. Mind you, we'd been living together for 2 years and I proposed to him in bed. About a week later, after I had pretty much convinced myself I'd need to find a new place to stay, he sang a song he wrote accepting the proposal. And we've been married 36 years.
Emotional Rollercoaster
I'm a guy and my wife proposed to me.
I was totally caught off guard, not specifically because I was the one being proposed to, but because we had never discussed marriage at any point prior.
As far as my reaction? Well it went down like this:
I got home from work and she was waiting in my room for me sitting on my bed. She was like "Take of your jacket". I said "Okay" and did so. Then immediately she said "Sit down". At this point I'm kind of concerned. Then she starts talking.
She said, "I really like you, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you." But I heard it as, "I really like you, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you..." and I was fully expecting her to say "but I can't". My heart dropped, I thought I was getting dumped.
Anyways, then she started babbling and not being able to collect her words and thoughts and I had no idea what was going on. Then she pulled out the box, with the ring. I said yes, and had to get my composure because of the emotional roller coaster I was on.
I hugged her, went upstairs, told my mom and cried (tears of joy). Then I went to the bar to tell all our friends. Now we're married and have a house and a dog :)
Carry Me
I've dragged him through Vienna for a week as this was on our first vacation together. Finally, he gave up and said he couldn't walk anymore. we sat down in the orangery of Schönbrunn Palace where I asked him. First thing he said was: Seriously? followed by: yes. followed by: you know, you have to carry me home now.
- Sjeru
Happy Halloween
Husband, here.
My then gf and I made an annual trip to Las Vegas for a Halloween music festival, for years. During the planning of the current year's trip she said "hey, we should get married on Halloween this year!"
I said it was a great idea and we got married.
That was ten years ago and we've been happily married ever since.
For what it's worth, we had been together for ten years already when she "proposed." We had a pretty nonchalant view on marriage but we instantly loved being married after.
10/10 would marry her again.
Beat Me To It
My wife proposed to me. I thought it was awesome! I was planning to ask her on New Years Eve, and she beat me to it and asked me on Christmas Eve. Never felt emasculated and still think it was awesome.
WTF
Giphy
He kinda went "What the f*ck?" like I was crazy or something.
This was after 6 years of living together. Then I started snooping and found out about all the skanks he was screwing on our couch while I was at work.
I'm in a different country now.
Calling Your Bluff
We were lying in bed on a Monday morning, wrestling. I mostly jokingly said "Marry me already." He said, "Are you seriously asking me?" I, thinking he was just calling my bluff, called his and said yes. Then he said yes and promptly called his mother, who was caught off guard about this news at 8:30 on a Monday. He agreed on the condition that he could still surprise me with a ring.
Going on 4 years married this winter. :)
The Theme
My sister in law proposed to my brother. She took some photos of his work stuff (he's a firefighter, so his last name is on everything) and put them on canvas. She convinced him to drive to one of their favorite places with this mystery box. When she finally got him to focus on the box, she pulled out the pictures and asked what the theme was. When he guessed his last name, she pulled out a paper saying "you stole my heart, can I steal your last name?"
He was pretty stoked. He was really excited that she asked, and said yes. When he told us, the family, he said he's relieved because proposing to her never crossed his mind. He was so content he would have never thought of change.
Taking Turns
I proposed to my husband, but we both already knew we would be getting married.
I like to think it was pretty romantic - at sunset on a bridge in a little French village in Provence. I made him turn around for something and he immediately figured out what was happening, so tried (and failed) to stay calm and just looked like he was going to burst from excitement.
I got down on my knee, told him he was the best thing that happened to me and asked. He said yes, of course, and we kissed.
Then he said he wanted to give it a try so he got down on one knee and proposed to me too!
We'd already discussed how we wanted the proposal would go, and decided while either of us could pop it if we wanted to, I was generally better at planning things out and putting my foot down (I was also the one to ask him out when we first met.)
Mid-Conversation
I wasn't planning on proposing, but the question just popped out in the middle of a conversation He said yes, then had to go for a walk to call his best friend and freak out a little bit.
When he got back we decided we needed to do it right- there weren't any rings at this stage, but we could at least do the whole down on one knee thing. We couldn't decide who should actually do that though, so we both got down on one knee and proposed to each other at the same time. And we both said yes.
- Why Aren't More Women Proposing To Men? | A Practical Wedding ›
- Should a Woman Propose To A Man??? - YouTube ›
- More Women Are Searching for Ways to Propose to Men | Brides ›
- Eight women who decided to propose - BBC News ›
- When Women Propose, This Is How It's Done ›
- 5 Very Real Reasons Why Women STILL Can't Propose | Brides ›
- This woman proposed to her boyfriend — here's why you shouldn't ... ›
- 8 Stories About Women Proposing to Men ›
- How Women Proposing To Men Are Challenging Gender Roles ›
- Men Describe Being Proposed to By Women - VICE ›
I once had a guy ask me if I was willing to follow him into the woods, depending on the price of the meal.
Yeah. No steak is worth that.
Plans After...
Wait What Wtf GIF by Saturday Night LiveGiphy"Thanks for the ride but I have a date with someone else, I figured you wouldn't drive me if you knew I was going on a date with someone else and I really needed a ride."
"Online dating, talked to her for a while, finally got the courage to ask her out and then she said that as we got there."
iareyours
Mirror Image
“'You look just like my wife!'”
catalinachild
"I did have a guy tell me I reminded him of his son. I don’t believe English has a word to adequately describe my feelings at that time."
UnicornMagicRainbow
"That would definitely do it."
chaotica78
Third Wheel
"'Hope you don't mind if my mother joins us.'"
ofsquire
"Actually had a girl do this on a first date because she had anxiety issues. Honestly wasn’t bad except that 90% of the time she was silent and her mom talked over her."
"I didn’t mind that much and wouldn’t have minded trying again when she was more comfortable except that she was let go at the company we worked at and she deleted her social media profiles and she never responded on her number. Ah well."
Seightx
Liar
Lying Simon Rex GIF by Simon Rex / Dirt NastyGiphy"'Hey bro aren't you gay? I made out with you last night.'"
"Random dude I've never seen before in front of my (f) date."
JHXC16
Was he lying though?
Filter Issues
"'You looked better on Tinder.'"
waqasnaseem07
"Isn’t it basic knowledge that everybody looks slightly worse than the worst picture you can find?"
no_user_ID_found
The Past
"'My ex used to do that too.'"
xxIvyOF
"Yep. I’ve definitely had two otherwise-decent-guy date-situations sour because the ex-comparisons just would not stop flowing. No woman wants to be seen as interchangeable—I’m not here to perfectly fill that ex-sized hole in your life. Focusing on the present moment and a future we could build together is a courtesy we need to grant each other in earliest dates of dating."
LarkScarlett
Powerless
"'I'm an alpha, you cant handle my top energy.'"
Midnightgay28
"I actually left a dude in the middle of dinner, in part, for saying this. I ordered an Uber under the table while pretending to listen to him. Went to the bathroom, and never came back. That was when I was young. Now I’d just say, 'How about we enjoy this meal in silence, before we head our separate ways.'”
UnicornMagicRainbow
Mommy...
"'Mother says I should be back by 9.'"
"Saying 'mother says' just feels weird."
bunnyrut
"That gives me Norman Bates vibes."
Werewolf_lover20
"'Mother says alligators are aggressive because they have an overabundance of teeth, but lack a toothbrush.'"
sodaextraiceplease
Obvs...
just kidding jk GIFGiphy"'If you were going to be murdered, what method would you prefer. Purely hypothetical. Obvs.'"
Specific_Tap7296
If it looks anything like a Dateline NBC episode... RUN!
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Or so you would think.
Do people still knit to pass the time? Are people actively collecting stamps?
It depends on who's asking.
Curious to hear about hobby trends, Redditor gizehgizeh asked:
"What are once popular hobbies that are slowly dying these days?"
Before we've become conditioned to living on our phones, these activities used to keep people occupied.
Before Texting, There Was This
"Letter writing."
– littlekingMT
Literal And Tangible Joy
"Well the internet killed pen pals for sure. I do remember I had a Japanese girl for a penpal maybe back in 2007 or so. I honestly don't remember how it started, pretty sure some website, but that was a fun experience. But now I can just straight up talk to foreign people real time, lol. But yea getting a physical letter that someone took the time to write and mail still is hard to beat feelings wise."
– skyburnsred
Model Trains
"When I was growing up, every town had a model train store in it. Now I have one in region and everything else has to be bought online."
– Hairy_Effective1172
Pretty Rocks
"Don’t see anyone playing marbles anymore, I had an awesome collection in school."
– sheeple85
"I had some marbles as a kid in the 90s. My grandma got them for me and I had no idea what I was supposed to do with them. I always imagined them as a thing kids in the 40s played with."
– Ryoukugan
People Were Moving Canvases
"Paintball has been dying a slow death since 2006. Sad, really."
– hobo_recycler
Before the general population began hating clutter, collecting was once a "thing."
Precious Coins
"Coin collecting... I'm a silver/gold nut and I'm always hunting for precious metal coins. whenever I go into a shop they get all excited because 'no one under 70 collects coins anymore.'"
– ThatFishySmell99
Post It
"Stamp collecting."
– spooky_scully_mulder
"Collecting in general, really. Of course there are still prominent collectors but it's slipped more into enthusiast and niche territory than being a popular hobby that you might expect anyone to have."
– iuytrefdgh436yujhe2
What A Gem
"Rockhounding was immensely popular back in the 1950's and 1960's. Personally, I think it's a fascinating and fulfilling hobby, but when I go to a meeting at a rock and gem club, I'm usually the youngest one in the room by several decades."
– filthy_lucre
People once enjoyed making things.
Admiring The View
"Stained glass. I learned how to make it from my old man, and my junior high art class teacher also taught it. Very few artisans are still around."
– brobeanzhitler
Metal Vocation
"Black smithing."
– kenworth117
"I bought a forge to try. It’s insanely hard work, and crazy expensive. I still haven’t finished a piece."
– DSentvalue
Scrapbooking
"Yeah. I'm watching the arts and crafts stores around me completely uninstalling their racks for specialty paper. Now the only thing they have is mega packs of repeating colors/images. To boot all the inclusions like papercraft/die-cut things, washi tape, scissors, stickers, etc have gotten so expensive I would rather go buy $5 bags at value village to get an assortment of things versus buying anything new. I really, really miss yard sales for the same reasons."
– Phantasmai
I envy people who have jobs that are basically their hobbies.
Not everyone gets paid doing what they actually enjoy and have a profound level of passion for.
If they do, kudos to them.
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While the process could take time, some people make our jobs much easier after spotting instant red flags.
Curious to hear about our general radar of people, Redditor xxFluffie asked:
"What is something that makes you immediately dislike someone?"
Some people just think they are absolutely hilarious and never realize they're the only ones laughing.
Next In Line
"They laugh about having screwed someone else over. If you think you're not next, well, you'll learn."
– whiznat
Unfunny
"when you mention you don't like a thing and they immediately do that thing 'as a joke.'"
– wayfinder
Playing Devil's Advocate
"Kneejerk contrarians. People who, no matter what you say you like or believe, just have to dismiss it and say they like or think the opposite."
– BubbhaJebus
People who put others down get slammed here.
Bad Parents
"When they treat their kids sh**ty in public. I don't mean handling tantrums, setting a rule, having to hurry to the train etc. I mean perfectly normal-behaved kids getting in trouble for trailing along peacefully, looking at things, asking questions etc."
"If you don't like tiny humans who learn the world, why have them??"
– raxeira-etterath
Public Humiliation
"Treating people sh**ty in public for laughs. Like being rude to service workers because they think it’s funny. Big red flag."
– Ok_Personality_1080
Simply Uncalled For
"Someone who is a d*ck to other people or animals for no reason."
– xebt1000
Those with ulterior motives rubs people the wrong way.
The Scheme
"If they try to get me to join their MLM scheme."
– spazmcgee1
Hard Sell
"A guy I used to be friends with in high school reached out a couple of years after graduating about a business opportunity he wanted my opinion on because 'you've always been smart', then he set up a Skype call and brought some other dude into the call and they started trying to sell me on what was clearly an MLM scheme. The guy went from friend to 'I'm never talking to you again' in a matter of 10 minutes."
– Mental-Afternoon-164
A Timeline
"Good gawd, this! I've had more than one exposure to this abject bullsh**tery..."
- Back in the late 80's/early 90's I was invited to a meeting of literally the OG "Pyramid" where you're recruited to pay in, and then you go out and recruit others to pay in, and the last in line got f'kall.
- In 1995 I had a coworker try to reel me into Amway, which was a hard no.
- In 2000 it was Pampered Chef, though to be fair they did have useful products.
- In 2009 a coworker tried to get me into some stupid video calling service that was obviously stupid from the description. He even got offended when I called bullsh*t.
– Mystical_Cat
Too much ego is a no-go.
I Can Do Better
"Being a b*tch just to stroke their own ego."
"We get it, you can lift 5lbs more than the 12 year old, you don't have to rub it in their face just because you're slightly better"
– Livia_Pivia
Can't Top This
"Oh, you did <story that's been told>? That's nothing! I did <implausible story>.
"I get the whole empathy through relating common experience, and I'm someone who does that (which drives some people crazy on its own), but there's a big different by empathising through common experience, and one-upmanship."
– Tisarwat
Lacking Conversational Etiquette
"Starting to talk over me when I was already talking."
"Stop it you rude, arrogant jerk."
– R33Gtst
If one or more of these traits sound familiar to you, you're not alone.
We don't have time for braggadocios, pyramid-schemers, and conversation interrupters.
And that's just for starters.
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Pleading to deaf ears...
"My dad told me he had hearing loss and couldn't hear me if I whined because my pitch would get too high."
"Would completely ignore me until I asked him questions in a normal voice."
"Trusted him implicitly until I was 12 and he yelled at my younger brother for whining."- Tyrion_Stark.
Get it while you can.
"That they took everything off the shelves when the supermarket closed."- fgyfddg.
venezuela empty shelves GIF by euronewsGiphySilly superstitions.
"My grandfather used to tell me that if I played with the fire, I'd pee the bed."
"I believed him for a while, until I got older."
"I think he was just trying to protect me from the fire."- teddypa1981.
"Rain, rain go away..."
"That if it was raining where I was, it was raining everywhere in the world."- morningshartz.
Age is just a number.
"My parents used to seem really old to me, so much so I believed they grew up like cave people as children, wearing giant leaves for clothes and what not."- Laleena_.
Hammer Floor GIF by VPROGiphySo that's how they're made!
"That smokestacks from the power plant created clouds."- Scaniarix.
An instant cure.
"The sun gives you sunburns, therefore, moonlight should heal them."- velocipeter.
Better safe than sorry.
"Don't drink and drive meant all drinks."
"My dad was super confused when I told him he wasn't allowed to have any soda until we got home."- hulagirlslovetoparty.
Don't believe everything you see on TV.
"There was an episode of Mickey Mouse where Mickey couldn’t reach something at first, so he tried again and somehow his arm was long enough to reach it."
"As a small kid I believed that if I couldn’t reach something, I should just try reaching for it again and my arm would then somehow be long enough to reach it."- That-Dutch-Person.
love him one piece GIFGiphyThe miracle of childbirth.
"That babies are pooped out."
"When I was like 7 I was listening to my aunt as she explained that childbirth was pretty intense and painful for her, and I was all solemnly like, 'yeah, sometimes just my poops are painful, I don’t think I could get a baby out' and she went 'um, WHAT?' and her reaction made me realize real quick that I had f*cked up somewhere and I tried to change the subject while my mind was just reeling lol."- thesoundingfurrows.
Oh to be a child again.
And to believe literally everything you're told.
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