Top Stories

Women Share The Obvious Hints They Dropped That Guys Completely Missed

Women Share The Obvious Hints They Dropped That Guys Completely Missed
Pexels

Guys listen, my man is dumb. Not unintelligent - but straight out dumb. I had a thing for him for ages and he was completely oblivious. I was a singer in a band when we met and would sing the whole set straight to him every single time. Like not even slickly at him, like I would sometimes sit right on the edge of the stage, grab his face in my hands and sing directly to him and only him. I even kissed him from the stage once. He still didn't get it. HOW DID HE NOT GET IT!?!


He laughs about it now that he can see it; mostly because I'm really not subtle. I have no poker face - and no idea how the hell he didn't catch it! Neither does he. Sometimes he'll catch me staring and just laugh and apologize for missing it for so long.

Reddit user xmobius0ne asked:

Women of reddit, what's the most obvious hint you gave to a guy that he didn't pick up on?

Women were quick to answer, and some men spoke up about hints they'd missed. I'm seriously concerned for the future of humanity, guys. Some of you are a little too oblivious; like, it can't be safe for you out here without supervision. Here are some of the more popular responses.

Floors And Belts

"That's a really nice belt. It would look better on my floor" while tugging at it and biting my lip. He looked at me totally confused before saying "Floors don't wear belts."

- meXJustXme

Must've Been A Prank

I literally wrapped my arms around him from behind and told him how cute I though the was. 5 years later we reconnected and started dating, he told me "I thought you were joking because you are too pretty to want to be with me"

Being insecure back then he convinced himself that he wasn't good enough and that it must have been a prank.

- paige120

The Discount

Giphy

Not a woman but was on the other end.

Worked at Kroger, super super cutie pie comes in with some friends they grab like 3 items and go through my line. I ring up the items and ask if they have a Kroger card (discount savings card.) She said no, she doesn't have a card.

I responded "That's ok you can enter your number." she looks at me with her super cute face and said "Can I have your number?"

I literally said: "I apologize, it's policy that I can't let you use my number for the Kroger discount."

She walked out very upset and the older guy that was bagging called me a f*ckin idiot. It was at that moment I understood I was a worthless virgin.

- xxchar69xx

Liquid Courage

He was my best friend and I liked him for years. I'd shyly drop hints and flirt sometimes when he was single, but was never brave enough to say anything outright. I got drunk with him alone one night and the liquid courage kicked in. I literally told him I was attracted to him and the alcohol was making me a want to be a "bad friend." He laughed and said that It was "sweet of me to say."

I thought at the time he was turning me down.

Fast forward months later and we're hanging out again with more liquid courage and I just flat out said that sexual tension was making thing weird for me and asked if we could hook up and I'd promise not to be a weirdo about it. He was shocked that I had these feels about him. I was stunned that he didn't know. Really dude?

Long story short he actually like me from day one as well and didn't think I was interested. So he happily friend zoned himself. Wtf! Now we've been married for 6 year and he still can't tell when I wanna bone without me clearly saying it. Love him.

- Adnama_Nyl

Tangible

A girl in the dorms texted me "Come down to my place so we can do something tangible." I didn't know what tangible meant then. Needless to say, I didn't do anything tangible that night.

- Stammbomb

The Type Of Hint

I told my husband on my way out that the house sure was messy. Came back home to a messy house.

Is this not the type of hint we are talking about?

- Zer_0

Those Cheesy Pornos

Laying in bed at night with my then-best friend/now husband, I was squirming around and complaining about how hot it was. I was uncertain because he wasn't throwing out hints, so I did the next best thing and I literally tried to act out one of those cheesy pornos.

"Ohhhhh, it's sooooooo warm, let me just get topless and throw off the covers and squirm around a little, moaning and groaning, in the hopes you might catch a glimpse and jump my bones!" Kind of like that. I took off my top so I was only wearing panties and HE STILL DIDN'T GET THE HINT.

Had to literally tell him I was interested before he made a move.

- morphinization

Serious About The Date

Giphy

He and I had been flirting for weeks. I asked him when he was planning on taking me out on a date. He laughed it off and I moved on. Years later, we happened to be at the same bar where he admitted having a huge crush on me for years. He didn't realize I had been serious about the date until I told him.

- CozyMeg

Mega Best Friends

I hugged and told him that I liked him. He responded by asking:

"So what are we? Best friends?"

"No, more than that!"

"Mega best friends?"

I never felt the need to smack my face against the concrete hard until that very day. Welp, I still love him and still together for almost 7 years now!

- meowrii_

Play Time

We've been living together for half a year, and dating for much longer.

Just finished a video game together.

Me: "I'm gonna go play with myself in bed." I walk towards the bed room whilst keeping eye contact with him.

Him: makes an acknowledging nod and says, "I won't disturb you then." He smiles and opens up Reddit to read the front page.

- MinamiQ

Oblivious

I'm a guy, but one time a girl had to literally tell me "I'm flirting with you now" because I'm oblivious to everything.

- ChompyNuggets

Happy New Year

Giphy

I'm the guy. After an evening in the pub a small group of us went back to her place to keep on drinking, about 2am I decide to leave and she is standing in front of me blocking the door, begging me to stay. "Sorry, I've got work tomorrow".

We ended up hooking up about a month later on new years eve when she called me a f*cking idiot.

- EarlOfBronze

Anti-Story

I have an anti-story of sorts..

Went to a place, met a woman, we flirted a bit. I asked "are you in any way interested in me", and her response was a shocked "no", to which I said "That's fine, I'd still like to be just friends".

She was shocked at my directness and caught off guard. But the fact of my directness interested her intensely. She and I are now together.

Please, humanity needs more direct talk and less posturing and pretense.

- democritusparadise

Booty Call

A friend had a small romance going on with a mutual friend. They'd had two dates. First one went well, and at the end she said that the only reason she wasn't inviting him back to hers was because she had a strict rule about not doing that after the first date. He didn't click that 'back to hers' = sex, and just assumed her house was messy. Second date went real well, but ended short when she found her brother was in hospital. At first he thought it was a ruse to end the date, but then she asked if he could drive her to the hospital.

So jump forward a few days and I'm out with him at a club. She messages him at about 11.30 asking what he's up to. He says out with mates, but it's a bit boring, he might head home. She says she has a nice bottle of rum but no Coke to mix it with - would he mind picking her up a bottle and bringing it over. At this point we are all giving him the pat on the back, and telling him to go get it. He is sure that she just wants a bottle of coke, and cbf going all the way out there to just turn around and come back.

She then offered to come grab him, and he asked why she didn't just grab herself a coke if she was happy to drive anyway. At this point, we are hanging bulk shit on him as he insists he doesn't think that it's a booty call. She's just hit him up at 11.30pm on a Saturday night after two dates because she wants a bottle of coke.

She ended up literally saying "what do I need to do to get you to come over and fuck me right now", at which point we were all basically on the floor laughing, and he ran to get a cab so quick I swear there was an outline of dust where we was like in a cartoon.

While waiting for him to arrive, she was messaging us to make sure we knew he was dumb as fuck and wanted to make sure we'd hung sh*t on him appropriately. We had.

- Ellen_-_Degenerate

(Font) Size Matters

Guy here.

We were 16(me) and 17(her) respectively. Kids, sure, but it's still a story. I had feelings for her until a few months before when I decided to give up. Kid me wasn't a persistent one.

We had a class together. She literally scribbled "I love you by the way" with like size 72 font in the notebook we've been chatting in for the whole lecture, in font 12. I guess she got a bit impatient. And it somehow missed me.

Six. Took me six freaking months to get it. I felt moronic for a year...

So, Lex, if you read this, I'm still sorry I was an idiot.

- KosViik

Facebook

He was telling me about a meeting that was happening in a bar in our town every Friday, and I said I was interested and asked if he had Facebook. He said "Yes but I don't really use it."

He said he was beating himself up for this stupid answer all the way back home and I still love to tease him about it! We've been together for over a year now :)

- merme91

What Did I Smoke?

Giphy

I was friends with this girl living in a different city during college. I once went to her and we talked the whole evening until the point that I had to go to catch the last train. She convinced me to stay and we both slept in her bed. She started cuddling and I asked her what she was doing. She said "nothing."

I subsequently asked her if she was trying to sleep with me. She said "no, that's why i'm laying next to you naked". I didn't pick up on the sarcasm and went "ok cool sleep well" and I turned around and went to sleep!

To this day I don't know what I smoked to miss that.

- gangsterbril

Never Have I Ever

One time, as a teenager, a girl made out with me at a party. I assumed it was a sympathy makeout session, since we had been playing "never have I ever. "

The next day she and I were hanging out with a group of friends when two random guys began talking to her and another girl in our group. At some point one of the guys asked if she had a boyfriend. She looked away from the guys, stared me directly in the eyes and said "no, I don't have a boyfriend."

At the time, my only thought was that was kind of weird

It took the rest of the summer for me to realize she was actually interested in me and wanted a more serious relationship.

We've been together for 11 years and married for 6... Just kidding - we never got together, because she was visiting for the summer and I didn't think long distance would work well. I saw her one time about two years later. She had started smoking and I had lost interest.

- shadowfaxbx


Things People Secretly Love But Would Never Admit To In Public

Reddit user sweet_chick283 asked: 'What do you secretly love that you would never admit to in public?;

Collection of VHS tapes
Bruno Guerrero/Unsplash

What makes us all unique is our passions and the things we love, whether it's singing in the shower, reading books, or listening to specific music artists.

Unfortunately, we live in a world where we are judged for our various tastes and interests thanks to social media, and it makes us consciously selective about sharing the things we love on the internet.

Curious to hear about people's personal desires under anonymity, Redditor sweet_chick283 asked:

"What do you secretly love that you would never admit to in public?"

These aren't really chores for the following Redditors.

Good Clean Fun

"Mopping, im a janitor and generally hate my work... but damn mopping is so good."

– MrDDog06

"When you have a great rhythm going it is something special. I get the same feeling while I vacuum, but won’t let my wife know I enjoy it."

– Bogus_34

Act Of Unwrinkling

"Ironing clothes. A dozen of them. Can’t explain how it relaxes me. I told one person and they looked at me like I’m crazy."

– eerie_white_glow

"My mum misses the days when dad would be out on a Friday night, my brother out with friends and me upstairs quietly playing PS1. She would pour herself a Bacardi & Coke and do the ironing while watching her TV shows."

"I'm sure she doesn't really miss it now that we've moved out and they've retired but it was her wind-down after a busy working week so I can see how people can find it relaxing."

– xdq

Our solo actions can spark joy.

Big Brother Is Watching

"pretending to be on the Truman show and whenever im in my house i act all inconspicuous so they dont know that i know that they’re watching me."

– Bec_121

"C’mon man, you’re not supposed to let him know. You signed a contract when signing up for live views. I’m reporting you."

– doeswaspsmakehoney

The Multi-Tasker

"Playing video games naked at home while eating cheese."

– thickening_agent

Releasing The Kraken

"I love the feeling when you've eaten good fibre and let out a solid long train log in the toilet. That feeling is heavenly."

– therapoootic

"Even better when it’s a clean wipe and not a poo crayon."

– TheWarmestHugz

Ultimate Comfort

"My (male 41) weekend routine is coming home from work, make hot chocolate, start a fire, dress in a ugly pink nightgown made for old ladies and watch forensic files."

– crazyloomis

Some people are obsessed with collecting things.

So Kawai

"Sanrio stationery stores. All those different multicolor pens, a thousand kinds of erasers, spiral bound notebooks galore... my kids sadly have absolutely no appreciation for this wonderland..."

– HavingNotAttained

It's A Staple

"Office supplies have a weird, special place in my heart ever since I was a kid. They don't even have to be 'cute' necessarily."

"Japan's legendary stationery stores is unironically a reason I want to go."

– _CozyLavender_

Not Caring Anymore

"The older I get the shorter that list gets. Not because I love less things, but because I don't care about hiding it."

– Bi-Beast

"YES!! I'm 53 now. I'm working my first job in public since 2006. Today is Halloween and we're allowed to dress up so I am sitting here waiting to go to work dressed as a VERY bad Wednesday Addams. My bf said I'd 'look stupid' because no one else will probably dress up and I'm like, 'WHO CARES!' My makeup looks horrible and not like I practiced, but I DO NOT CARE! I'm having fun with it anyhow and I don't care if my coworkers dress up or not. I'm bein' ME! :)"

– deanie1970

Honorable mentions start here.

The Savior

"Picking up worms from the street and sidewalks when it rains and moving them into the dirt so they don’t burn in the sun, every time it rains I do this."

– sky_kitten89

Hero Of The Moment

"Yoooo I scoot SO many snails and worms. I work as a tech/mechanic at an automotive shop, I had a peoject car towed to my house the other day and it was covered in snails. I saw them when the tow guy/coworker was unloading and I was like, 'oh! It comes with free snails!' and began moving them. He laughed then realized and said, '... Oh, you're serious. Uh... Okay.'"

"I don't care who knows it. These little things barely can look out for themselves, why shouldn't we if we can take a moment to help? I don't care what happens next, it probably doesn't matter overall but I can help this moment."

– chris14020

Why should some of the hidden desires mentioned above have to be secret?

Redditors opening up about some of these would make them a hit at parties–no shaming.

As a matter of fact, I'll totally be down for a Forensic Files viewing party where we all make hot chocolate, light the fireplace, and cozy up together in our respective pink ugly nightgowns for old ladies.

historical reenactors
Sigmund on Unsplash

We've probably all heard some variation of the saying "Truth is stranger than fiction."

Real life isn't just strange, it can also be downright ridiculous.

History is riddled with moments of absurdity.

So ridiculous that people have a hard time believing real life is, well, really real.

Keep reading...Show less