Wife Files For Divorce Hoping Husband Will Fight It And Reconcile, And He's Not Sure How To Proceed
Redditor gonewild9676 has found himself in quite the predicament. His wife had a few ideas regarding their marriage and now he's a bit perplexed, to say the least.Take a listen...
I'm confused, torn, and a mess right now. We've been married for 11 years, and for the last year she has been all but shunning me. She asked for space, I've given it to her. She's had a friend with at least an emotional affair.
We've had marriage counseling that went nowhere. It seems like every olive branch I've extended to her has been shot off. I've been raising our 8 year old almost as a single father for the past year. She's been sleeping in another room and locking herself in it. She's been coming home late and pretending I don't exist. She sold her business late last year and hasn't worked a steady gig since. She has a STEM degree and experience running a business, so she can get a decent job.
Last year I was working at a toxic company and knew my job was in jeopardy. Frankly I was a nervous mess, but was hoping to finish one last project and bail, but was laid off with a nice severance. Meanwhile I've landed a new gig at a much nicer company.
Anyways, a few weeks ago she ended counseling and filed for divorce. Then last night I got a call from a friend who said she broke down and said she didn't really want it she thought I'd fight it.
I don't really want one, but if she wants out I'm not holding her hostage. She went through all kinds of abuse as a kid and I figured I triggered something and she had checked out of the marriage. I've talked to several people and they came to that decision and that she's kind of lost in life right now. Frankly if the divorce goes through she's getting the short stick in the deal. Maybe cold feet?
I'm willing to go talk with the friend and her with an open mind. What's the best way for me to navigate this? On one side I'm sick of her treatment of me. On the other side we had 10 really good years and I'd rather not split custody of our daughter. How should I handle this?
My wife has filed for divorce but told a friend she doesn't really want one. What do I do?
Don't Engage...
she didn't really want it she thought I'd fight it
You're old enough to remember "WarGames" and how it ended, yes?
The only winning move is not to play.
How about a nice game of chess?
Yes, I agree with this assessment as well.
I'm at the point now where I sincerely believe actions speak louder than words.
That's a hot mess honey!Â
Sheesh this is a mess. First, I'd like to ask, why don't you want a divorce? I'm having a hard time seeing any compelling reason to continue living this relatively miserable existence. I'm sure your answer is a long the lines of "I still love her deeply" or "we had 10 year together that were wonderful, surely we can get back to that." Before you tell me why you want to stay, allow me to present a few points:
- the staggering immaturity displayed by her is truly amazing. She asked for a divorce because she "wanted you to fight it/fight for her." That's so high school/college dating crap. You know the type: tells her boyfriend she's fine, he accepts it, then she gets pissed at him for not forcing her to talk/ she breaks up with guy over trivial reason, he accepts it, she gets mad he didn't fight for the relationship. Point being, it's all a test. And something a woman her age should not being doing to a long term partner, out of what I believe is complacency and boredom in your marriage.
- she has actively avoided you and ignored you while living in the same house, and sounds like she avoided your daughter too. If for no other reason then giving your daughter a healthy upbringing where she's not actively living in the same house as a emotionally neglectful mother, you should want to get out.
- you can't save her or make her suddenly not be lost in life. Deciding to not get divorced won't help her find herself. In fact, getting divorced and having a chance to explore who she is and life could be best for her.
- she had at least one emotional affair on you. That should bother you considerably more. It's not like she doesn't have love to give, she just has no desire to give it to you. By all accounts, it sounds like she wasn't terribly engaged in couples therapy, which means what issues do exist, she has no desire to change. This won't change if you decide not to divorce.
As to how to navigate this when you talk, ask her why she felt the need to file for divorce if she didn't want one. If she says she wanted you to fight for her, tell her it is ridiculous and immature to "test" you after 10 years of marriage. By all accounts you did the mature thing. You accepted it as what she wanted, and wanted what she wanted. There's no excuse for her actions. Personally, if it were me, I'd deeply ponder the points above and consider what you really need. I would likely come to the conclusion that divorce is for the best, and tell her as much.
The mother of your daughter has to not want that for herself. You already have a child to take care of. You can't adopt an adult too. Especially one who has proven herself perfectly capable of functioning when she wants to.
You can't read her mind. You know that she's checked out and you know that she filed for divorce. Act on what you know, not speculation. If she doesn't really want the divorce, she can use her big girl words and talk to you. Otherwise, it's time to protect yourself and your child.
Hello Dr. Phil...
Sounds like your wife had a really tough start on life, and while doing really well for the past 10 years, she may be coming apart now. But, sad as it is, you can't save her. She can only save herself, and you can only support her if she lets you, and if you feel it is something that you want to do and can do. It is important to consider your daughter too, and what is best for her in terms of the environment she grows up in and the kinds of adults and behaviour that she sees and experiences. It's not just about having both your parents in the same house, but having a safe, secure and loving environment to grow up in. The current situation sounds very unhealthy - and don't think for a moment your daughter can't see what's going on or doesn't suffer because of it. Children appear resilient because they have no choice, not because they wouldn't be breaking apart inside.
To me it seems like your wife needs individual therapy to deal with her childhood, but it can take years to process and develop healthy attachment and communication models. And it is very hard work and can be very painful, so she has to be very committed to the process.
In any case it might be best for your wife to move away for a while, as that will give everyone a bit of breathing space, and as she is struggling to be a partner and a mother, will give her a break from those responsibilities so that she can focus on herself.
Can you go to one more session with your couples therapist to discuss your options? I don't think talking to your wife and her friend will help, as the friend will only take your wife's side.
Having said that, going through with the divorce may still be the best option for everyone.
Only actions and facts matter...
Deal with facts and not wishes. Deal with the fact she's filed for divorce and act accordingly. That means preparing for all aspects, family, legal, otherwise. It doesn't matter what you've heard. Words are useless while the process is in effect. If she doesn't want to divorce then she needs to follow through and withdraw it, if that can be done. The fact she's filed already takes this past certain points of no return. Maybe you can rebuild but any life with her after this will be affected by what she's done.
Personally I'd take that information as all the MORE reason to divorce because it means this must be some kind of half-assed fucked-up badly-planned brinskmanship ploy to get some specific reaction out of you. And it's not like SHE told you this to your face. (Either that or she paniced when she realised the financial implications.)
I guess you could sign up for couples counselling to try to get to the bottom of what she's actually up to, what she actually wants, but IMHO that's unlikely to work: plus as you say, she's shot herself in the foot here by shooting down all your attempts to resolve this.
TBH I think you'd be happier not married to someone who plays stupid games and makes you feel like crap.
Carpe Diem...
No reason to live unhappy, unwanted, or unloved. Life is too short. Your 8 year old sees it as well. Keep that in mind. Do what is best for you and your child.
Right now nobody is winning...
I fully appreciate the soft spot in your heart that you have for your wife regarding her terrible childhood. I really do. That being said, there is a point for every adult who has been abused in childhood that they must recognize the damage done and learn to mitigate its effects on their adult lives. I am not saying that your wife shouldn't have difficulties based on her past, but that she has to acknowledge these obstacles and learn to deal with them as an adult that wants to thrive in spite of the trauma. You can't use her past as an excuse for her current behavior. She has to accept some responsibility and act as a partner to you and as a mother to your daughter. It doesn't sound like she's doing either of those things and that she is in dire need of intensive therapy.
I don't know that you can save her from her past if she's not willing to work on it herself. I wish you the best. ♡
She didn't tell you this directly so it's not really your responsibility to deal with. It's just manipulative. If she wants to improve things she could have come to you. Or gone to counseling herself. But instead she's been pretty terrible for a year.
I don't think you can trust what she told a friend as true either... She may just be trying to save face as "not the bad guy" to this person while she's the one who withdrew effort from fixing things.
Best of luck to you!
You and your daughter first...
Listen, the way she treated you this last year was basically emotional and psychological abuse. Look it up. She shunned you for the entire year and had emotional affairs. The onus isn't on you to make her a well adjusted and healthy person to be a good mom and a good wife. The onus is on her to keep that shit under control.
I tell this to a lot of people as I'm involved in mental health wellness. Your responsibility isn't to fix someone with mental health issues so they can stay with you. Your responsibility is to support them. When she unilaterally decides she's going to hurt you and the family its not your responsibility to tolerate it and allow her to hurt you and your child in the process. Its your responsibility to protect that child at all costs.
If she wants out and its a bad situation let her have it. If she couldn't come to her senses a year ago and realize how badly she was hurting her child then I don't think she deserves a second or third chance from you. All that's going to happen is your child is going to end up hurt again. You don't think this last year of her mom being pretty much absent and rejecting her hasn't just destroyed her self-esteem and emotions?
Your wife went through some terrible things. Now she's doing them to your daughter. Get her out of both your lives and fight as hard as you can for majority custody. That poor little baby is suffering right now and the best thing you can do is get her mom out of the house to protect her. At least this way you can start to regain some form of normalcy around the house and work forward through all the hurt she's just gone through.
Your biggest responsibility is to protect your child. You're not doing that right now. Having a mom who is actively rejecting her in the house is a lot worse for her than a mom who isn't in the house at all.
As a "high achieving" student, the biggest mind-blowing fact I have ever learned has been the sheer amount of straight-up lying that happens in formal education.
It's a lot. Like a lot a lot. History class lied so hard.
Oxford
<p>Oxford University was founded in 1096 and is several hundred years older than Machu Picchu.</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l12ncg/whats_a_fact_that_absolutely_blew_your_mind/gjx8tm8?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">GParkerG93</a></p><p>Oxford was founded 300 years before the Aztec empire</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l12ncg/whats_a_fact_that_absolutely_blew_your_mind/gjxxhmy?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">AnduBandu</a></p><p>Wai..wah wai wai wiai, WHAT?</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l12ncg/whats_a_fact_that_absolutely_blew_your_mind/gjxif90?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">CosmicSnowball14</a></p>On Trial
<img lazy-loadable="true" data-runner-src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yNTUxMTc2Ni9vcmlnaW4uZ2lmIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTYyMzU1ODI5M30.4pq1QJyuoP_wmlhACwoWdU54nobqlAzCrs2CaxXZ_BQ/img.gif?width=980" id="ed537" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="a40beaebe19748acb8a2266ddd95141d" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" data-width="500" data-height="375" />pet sleeping GIFGiphy<p>In the Middle Ages, European countries would put on real trials for animals. They were legitimate, with real defense attorneys. </p><p>A sow and her piglets were put on trial for killing a five-year-old kid. The sow was found guilty and put to death, but her piglets were acquitted because there was no evidence they took part.</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l12ncg/whats_a_fact_that_absolutely_blew_your_mind/gjx1wyz?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">natsugreyzera</a></p><p>They did this in Tennessee in the 1900's where an elephant was tried and hanged for murder.<a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mary_(elephant)" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank"></a></p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l12ncg/whats_a_fact_that_absolutely_blew_your_mind/gjy3tyr?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">TheoryPlane</a></p>Sharks
<p>Sharks have existed 100 million years before the first trees. </p><p>Sharks first showed up on the scene 350 million years ago and 250 million years ago. Also, sharks have survived 4 of the 5 mass extinctions. They didn't exist for the first one. </p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l12ncg/whats_a_fact_that_absolutely_blew_your_mind/gjx1fss?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Stayathomedadof6</a></p>Room To Spare
<p>All the planets in our solar system can fit between the Earth and the Moon, with a little room to spare.</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l12ncg/whats_a_fact_that_absolutely_blew_your_mind/gjx85ye?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Imajica0921</a></p><p>Whaaaa? Oddly this one hurts my brain the most.</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l12ncg/whats_a_fact_that_absolutely_blew_your_mind/gjx9wk2?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">dmbf</a></p><p>There's a lot of space in space.</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l12ncg/whats_a_fact_that_absolutely_blew_your_mind/gjzntot?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">madgietoyousir</a></p>Clean BonesÂ
<p>That when you brush your teeth you're actually cleaning your skeleton</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l12ncg/whats_a_fact_that_absolutely_blew_your_mind/gjwzxbe?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">maidenHELL6669</a></p><p>Gotta keep your bone mech clean. That flesh armor only guards so much.</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l12ncg/whats_a_fact_that_absolutely_blew_your_mind/gjxoun4?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Shumatsuu</a></p><p>Gross, thanks! </p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l12ncg/whats_a_fact_that_absolutely_blew_your_mind/gjxm8of?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">ppity_pangolin</a></p>Light Horizon
<p>There is a light horizon in the universe, and we will never know what's beyond it</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l12ncg/whats_a_fact_that_absolutely_blew_your_mind/gjx2y18?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Money_Display_5389</a></p><p>The funny thing, (or maybe just terrifying thing), is that at some point in the far future, the light horizon will actually get smaller over time. </p><p>This is because the universe is expanding faster then light can travel, and so that light will never make it to us no matter how much time passes, and this phenomenon will only become more relevant.</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l12ncg/whats_a_fact_that_absolutely_blew_your_mind/gjynpnr?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">ZanyThings</a></p>The Beatles
<img lazy-loadable="true" data-runner-src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yNTUxMTc3MS9vcmlnaW4uZ2lmIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTYxODQ5ODcxOX0.1DyC3fQGrmURKaz809wvgafTj26Hak_-WKDyc4B9UoI/img.gif?width=980" id="8d6fe" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="3419f853fad72027fcdecbaf7bb2eaa2" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" data-width="400" data-height="337" />the beatles GIF by US National ArchivesGiphy<p>The Beatles were only together for 7 years. Well, technically for 8 but they released all of their albums in a seven year stretch, releasing two albums a year for many of those years.</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l12ncg/whats_a_fact_that_absolutely_blew_your_mind/gjxbtav?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">VikingWithGuns</a><span></span></p><p>Even crazier- when they broke up, Paul McCartney was 28.</p><p>Think about it- all that genius, the music, the success, the greatest band ever to exist- and he wasn't even 30.</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l12ncg/whats_a_fact_that_absolutely_blew_your_mind/gjy8t5z?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">YourlocalTitanicGuy</a></p>They Have To Die For My Survival
<p>Diseases are caused by micro organisms. </p><p>Organisms. Germs are organisms. </p><p>It totally blew my mind that the thing screwing my internal organs was a group of sentient living beings that have to die for my survival.</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l12ncg/whats_a_fact_that_absolutely_blew_your_mind/gjxbgc7?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">CrimsonMarksman</a></p>Ice Age
<p>Cleopatra lived closer to the invention of the iphone than the completion of the Great Pyramid</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l12ncg/whats_a_fact_that_absolutely_blew_your_mind/gjxly7q?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">jfaissalesmfe5</a></p><p>Woolly Mammoths still walked the earth when the Great Pyramid was being built.</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l12ncg/whats_a_fact_that_absolutely_blew_your_mind/gjy9st1?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Volkspanzerisme</a></p><p>So by correlation, Cleopatra lived closer to the release of the movie Ice Age, than the actual ice age.</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l12ncg/whats_a_fact_that_absolutely_blew_your_mind/gjzdvjl?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">BurritoBandito5</a></p>Flaunt It
<p>Jumping spiders have basically the same vision we do, they can see us and know when we're looking at them and like to show off!</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l12ncg/whats_a_fact_that_absolutely_blew_your_mind/gjxibgj?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">kikaf32645</a></p><p>Ugh I hate those spiders. We had one in the house once and it kept waving its arms around.'</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l12ncg/whats_a_fact_that_absolutely_blew_your_mind/gjz6duj?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Cyannotsus</a></p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l12ncg/whats_a_fact_that_absolutely_blew_your_mind/gjz6duj?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank"></a>Jumping spiders are the only kind of spider, that I as an arachnophobe like.</p><p>They're fluffy, cute and this fact cements that.</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l12ncg/whats_a_fact_that_absolutely_blew_your_mind/gjxnj47?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">HelluhTrill420</a></p>People Describe The Worst Thing A 'Good Guy' Has Ever Done In A Children's Movie Or Show
We go hard on A Goofy Movie around here. Tevin Campbell as Powerline is the real King of Pop 'round these parts. The perfect cast is standard choreography
I needed to tell you all that so you understood it is not an attack on the movie when I say Max sucked.
Peter Pan
<p>Tink in Peter Pan is an absolute monster. She tried to get the Lost Boys to murder Wendy. The whole film is full of abhorrent morality.</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kz8apq/whats_the_worst_thing_a_good_guy_ever_did_in_a/gjnjmez?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Enochuout</a></p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kz8apq/whats_the_worst_thing_a_good_guy_ever_did_in_a/gjnjmez?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank"></a>To be fair, this is an older fairy story; and while still in the modern age was far back enough that they hadnt fully sanitized the stories into cutesy BS. There is still danger and risk and sinister things lurking in the edges of the world and the hearts of some characters.</p><p>Tink is a <em>fairy</em>, she is fey and so is her morality. </p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kz8apq/whats_the_worst_thing_a_good_guy_ever_did_in_a/gjodddt?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Considered_Dissent</a></p>Kids In Cages
<p>Lab Rats. The dad/inventor kept the kids in CAGES and it wasn't until he married and got a stepson that they got rescued. Then everyone was all, "oh well, good times!"</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kz8apq/whats_the_worst_thing_a_good_guy_ever_did_in_a/gjn38dv?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">WeaverOfCloth</a></p><p>yeah, and don't forget that the main characters constantly physically harass their nonsuperpowered foster brother, even after he gets superpowers, otherwise, pretty good show.</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kz8apq/whats_the_worst_thing_a_good_guy_ever_did_in_a/gjnqrx1?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">bigbrainedidiot777</a></p>Walled Up Alive
<img lazy-loadable="true" data-runner-src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yNTUxMTM3NC9vcmlnaW4uZ2lmIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTY2MjUyMTc0OH0.9hvoLCUVK3SCP18ptT2oK3vcJK2_Y6XGEc6wWLt4emU/img.gif?width=980" id="3c674" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="5097f2e2bd3d49134224904891f6d8c7" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" data-width="320" data-height="240" />thomas GIFGiphy<p>The Fat Controller in Thomas the Tank Engine bricking up Henry the green train.</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kz8apq/whats_the_worst_thing_a_good_guy_ever_did_in_a/gjmusxo?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">jennyrob669</a></p><p>All Henry wanted was a coat of waterproof paint or a break from work till the rain stopped.</p><p>Nope, brick up the tunnel and take up the tracks. '</p><p>F*ck you engine, you work for me!</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kz8apq/whats_the_worst_thing_a_good_guy_ever_did_in_a/gjna9zl?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">FatNino</a></p><p>Came here for this! Lol. The look on his (it's?) poor face. Gets me every time. </p><p>Nooooo don't brick me in for eternity, I only wanted to keep my paint shiny!!!</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kz8apq/whats_the_worst_thing_a_good_guy_ever_did_in_a/gjnfzns?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">hidefromthe_sun</a></p>Brain Damage Makes You Perfect
<p>Here's my entry to help get conversation going:</p><p>In the 2005 Disney movie <em>Chicken Little</em>, the school bully, Foxy Loxy, gets teleported by aliens and suffers brain damage resulting in a massive personality change. </p><p>When the aliens move to return her to normal, Runt Of The Litter stops them, saying she was now "perfect". It's then implied the two become romantically involved.</p><p><span></span>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kz8apq/whats_the_worst_thing_a_good_guy_ever_did_in_a/gjlnacn?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">HooDooSquad</a></p><p>It was less of a "massive personality change" and more "massive brain damage".</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kz8apq/whats_the_worst_thing_a_good_guy_ever_did_in_a/gjnv9hd?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Satyrane</a></p><p>Yeah. That was super creepy. He was basically attracted to her because she got an accidental lobotomy. That's some pretty predatory behavior if you ask me</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kz8apq/whats_the_worst_thing_a_good_guy_ever_did_in_a/gjnv3h8?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">anoncoolguy69</a></p>Wizard Woes
<p>In Wizards of Waverly Place the whole concept of the Family Wizard Competition is super f*cked up and immoral. </p><p>Basically when all the children of a family come of age they compete to see who's the best wizard, and the ones who lose are stripped of their powers. Imagine if we have our kids take a vision test and blinded the ones who fail.</p><p>Anyways there was a recurring character who was friends with the main cast who was later revealed to be leading a revolution to overthrow this system. The entire main cast labels her as evil, puts a stop to her plan, and then literally murders her at the end.</p><p>More specifically what happened was that they froze her solid to hold her in place while they transferred her powers. Then the village idiot came and knocked her over by accident, shattering her into pieces. They then proceeded to make jokes about her corpse.</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kz8apq/whats_the_worst_thing_a_good_guy_ever_did_in_a/gjmwqxj?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">StandUpGaming</a><br></p>Gentrifying Lazytown
<p>Sportacus and Stephanie treating Robbie Rotten badly all because he didn't want to be active. </p><p>Let him live in Lazytown in peace!</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kz8apq/whats_the_worst_thing_a_good_guy_ever_did_in_a/gjmygjh?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Chuckbookworm</a></p><p>Those two came to a place literally called <em>Lazytown</em> and tried to force everyone to be more active and stuff. If anything, Robbie Rotten should've been the hero for trying to maintain how the town should be</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kz8apq/whats_the_worst_thing_a_good_guy_ever_did_in_a/gjn6yrd?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Truly_Meaningless</a></p><p>Sportacus and Stephanie wanted to establish a 'work will set you free' regime in Lazytown.</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kz8apq/whats_the_worst_thing_a_good_guy_ever_did_in_a/gjp40ao?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Prof_Black</a></p>Threat To Society
<p>In the 4th season of Winx Club, the main characters get a new power up, the Believix, and it is a mess. They each get a new power to use at their own discretion. Here is a quick description of what these powers let them do:</p><ul><li>Strength of Life (Bloom): It lets her make people believe in magic and help them overcome their weaknesses. She decides what qualifies as a weakness. She overrides a person's free will to make them believe in magic, which just so happens to make the girls stronger, and rewrite their personality if she doesn't like it.</li><li>Dawn of Light (Stella): It lets her make people more cooperative and accepting. Basically, she overrides another person's free will so they do what she says.</li><li>Breath of the World (Flora): It lets her make people show more appreciation for nature. Nice on paper, but it basically makes people ignore potentially more important tasks, or forego certain technologies, in favor of nature.</li></ul>Mrs. Doubtfire
<img lazy-loadable="true" data-runner-src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yNTUxMTM2OS9vcmlnaW4uZ2lmIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTY1MzgwNDAzMX0.Dq-VeFDrmpnazICzv1lX8uVKYZ-HQ6TbkWbH0h6NvsU/img.gif?width=980" id="8c908" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="45956993e65b85129871ecd0409e14f8" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" data-width="245" data-height="220" />robin williams today GIFGiphy<p>As a kid, you side with Robin Williams. Rewatching it as an adult, the guy was seriously dysfunctional and his wife was absolutely right to divorce him.</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kz8apq/whats_the_worst_thing_a_good_guy_ever_did_in_a/gjmyr3r?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">ChemicalGeekery</a></p><p>He was pretty dysfunctional and didn't provide a great environment for the children until he pretended to be somebody else. He was only a good parent when he pretended to be somebody else. </p><p>It's also super super creepy that he disguised himself to get back into his ex-wife's house.</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kz8apq/whats_the_worst_thing_a_good_guy_ever_did_in_a/gjngje2?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Rows_</a></p>Santa Sucks
<p>I apologize if this has already been covered, but Santa Claus is a total a$$hole in Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer...</p><p>I can understand the young Reindeer making fun of Rudolph's red nose. Kids are mean and will easily make fun of someone for being different.</p><p>But then Santa walks in... He could have set everyone straight right there. Explained how its our differences that make everyone special and all of that.</p><p>No. </p><p>He readily agrees with everyone that Rudolph is a lost cause and even tells Donner he should be ashamed of his Son's red nose.</p><p>Da f*ck!?</p><p><span></span>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kz8apq/whats_the_worst_thing_a_good_guy_ever_did_in_a/gjmu7j4?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">ScotchyT</a></p><p>Until he needs him, then all of a sudden he's part of the group and useful and liked. That's some "fit in or go f*cking die" mess if I ever saw it.</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kz8apq/whats_the_worst_thing_a_good_guy_ever_did_in_a/gjn5vhw?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">therealtidbits</a></p>Board games are designed carefully by teams of experts. Countless brainstorm sessions are carried out, designs and prototypes are proposed and changed, and plenty of focus groups are consulted along the way.
Start On a High NoteÂ
<p>"In Scrabble, the person who can make the longest word goes first, highest points breaks a tie. This makes the game more fun by ensuring there are lots of places to play your letters." -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l0f4k2/what_is_an_extra_rule_your_family_added_to_a/gjtfphl?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">mimlitsch</a></p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"I thought this was a legit rule lol my family does this too." -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l0f4k2/what_is_an_extra_rule_your_family_added_to_a/gjtq75g?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">OakSmoke2019</a></p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"That's an amazing rule! Also it would be ideal if they started the word slightly to the left so ensure a more balanced board." -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l0f4k2/what_is_an_extra_rule_your_family_added_to_a/gjtov6t?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">z0rb0r</a></p>The Long GameÂ
<p>"My father in law keeps note of who has wronged him with a series of annotations beside the score when we play cards" -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l0f4k2/what_is_an_extra_rule_your_family_added_to_a/gjtqg0e?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">8765432109</a></p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"Plot twist: it's not to get revenge in-game, it's to give him the longest list at the annual Festivus Airing of the Grievances." -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l0f4k2/what_is_an_extra_rule_your_family_added_to_a/gjuidz0?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">YVRJon</a></p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"That's amazingly petty and I absolutely love it." -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l0f4k2/what_is_an_extra_rule_your_family_added_to_a/gjv4xlt?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">DKlurifax</a></p>Corrupt CapitalismÂ
<p>"In monopoly we have a rule that my sister cant be the banker otherwise its like watching Oceans 11" -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l0f4k2/what_is_an_extra_rule_your_family_added_to_a/gjtpe9o?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">graeuk</a></p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"Hubby is not allowed to even SIT near the banker, and no one stores any money anywhere near him. If HE suggests we play, we scour the area for hidden money before he sits down." -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l0f4k2/what_is_an_extra_rule_your_family_added_to_a/gjuc5di?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">RunnerMomLady</a></p>Piping Down
<p>"In every co-op game (Pandemic, Castle Panic, whatever), there is usually someone who tries to tell everyone what to do. I can accidentally be this person."</p><p>"So, I implemented the 'right hand man' rule. IF the person whose turn it is want advice (IF), they can only get it from the person on their right. Nobody else can say anything."</p><p>"Makes things way more enjoyable."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l0f4k2/what_is_an_extra_rule_your_family_added_to_a/gjtp4ep?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">ThrowAwayTheTeaBag</a></p>Unstoppable BobÂ
<p>"Trouble is a fun little game. Unfortunately, with the wife and son, we only have three players. Four players makes it even more fun, so we have a fourth player we call 'Bob.'"</p><p>"Bob gets the last turn in the cycle. Someone rolls for Bob, and then the three of us agree on what Bob's best move is."</p><p>"It's especially fun when you have to agree that Bob's best move is to take out one of your own pieces."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l0f4k2/what_is_an_extra_rule_your_family_added_to_a/gjtoifo?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">LockjawTheOgre</a></p>Spicing Things UpÂ
<p>"'The Mugging Rule' in Monopoly."</p><p>"If I land on a space that you are currently occupying, I can choose to mug you. We take turns rolling the dice, if I roll higher, I steal $100, if you roll higher I go to jail."</p><p>--<a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l0f4k2/what_is_an_extra_rule_your_family_added_to_a/gjtld17?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">garysredditaccount</a></p>The Seat of WisdomÂ
<p>"In Trivial Pursuit, we have a rule - if the player being asked doesn't know the answer, they can ask the room. The room doesn't actually answer, but they say whether they know the answer or not."</p><p>"If nobody knows the answer, it's considered an invalid question, and another card gets drawn instead. (if someone in the room does know, but the player being asked doesn't, then it's just a plain old 'pass')"</p><p>"My Dad knows a lot of stuff ... I mean, a LOT. When he was a kid he read the Encyclopaedia Britannica for fun. Basically, the rule was born from, 'If even Dad doesn't know the answer, then nobody does and it's a terrible question.'"</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l0f4k2/what_is_an_extra_rule_your_family_added_to_a/gjtfsx0?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">xenchik</a></p>Because Why the Hell NotÂ
<p>"At the end of scrabble you make up a story with all the words on the board. We never looked at the tiles for scores, we just played to get the best words on the board." -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l0f4k2/what_is_an_extra_rule_your_family_added_to_a/gjtl8bt?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">blupidibla</a></p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"We did something similar with Cards Against Humanity. Pick up a card, start the story, go around the table. Got some really weird stories." -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l0f4k2/what_is_an_extra_rule_your_family_added_to_a/gjts286?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Snorks43</a></p>Updated to the Modern EraÂ
<p>"Nukes in Risk"</p><p>"If you roll three sixes when attacking you defeat every army on the territory you're attacking into. If you roll three ones, you nuke yourself and lose every army in the territory you're attacking from"</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l0f4k2/what_is_an_extra_rule_your_family_added_to_a/gjtaz1j?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Len-K</a></p>A Confidence ExerciseÂ
<p>"If you say sorry while playing Uno, you pick up 2 cards! Slap that +4 down with authority!"</p><p>"Also, if you have exactly the same card as the one that has just been played, you can jump in and play your duplicate regardless of if it's your turn or not"</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l0f4k2/what_is_an_extra_rule_your_family_added_to_a/gjtla61?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">jb28737</a></p>People Explain Which Things Are Actually Cheap To Make But Sell At A Ridiculous Price
Businesses have to turn a profit to be able to stay operational. We get it. A consumer is paying more than it costs to make the product to purchase the product. The upside of accepting this fact should be we're being provided a service and experience we couldn't possibly get on our own. However, there are those products that are overcharged, especially compared to the development costs, that are charged a high price for what feels like no reason outside of making a ridiculous amount of money.