People Break Down Which Common Things Have Never Actually Happened To Them
Yu Wang/Unsplash

The fun thing about statistics is that there's always someone or something on the other side.

If something is rare, it probably won't happen to you - but there's always someone it DOES happen to. We talk about those people a lot.

But let's flip that - what about the weirdos among us who have somehow managed to avoid an incredibly common thing?

Reddit user brokendowndryer asked:

"What is something common that has never happened to you?"

My mother, for example, just never got chicken pox. She's outside of a population where vaccination was commonly available, so it was a disease to be feared growing up. They talked about it like the boogeyman that came to steal your babies.

She, despite having a massive family with double-digit cousins around all the time, managed to avoid it. As an adult with her own money, she feared it so much that she would leave the house when any of the kids, and then grandkids, got it.

My mom went on chicken-pox vacay a lot and I'm starting to wonder how much of it was just her trying to avoid us...

Anyway, while I grapple with the realization of a childhood lie and text my mother dramatically about it, you take a look at the stuff that Reddit has somehow managed to avoid:

The Smart Answer

Nbc No GIF by Brooklyn Nine-NineGiphy

"This is jinx territory, I'm not answering."

- rizdalegend

"I once said I’d never had a motorcycle accident or broken a bone. 2 separate conversations with 2 separate people in the office that day."

"Guess what happened that night on the way home?"

"Answer at your own risk guys…"

- Speedy_Dragon46

"I have an answer. I'm absolutely not gonna say it for this reason!"

- An_otherThrowAway

"I concur, this zone is not safe. Blue team out."

- Roosterfish33

One Day Your Prince Will Come

"Being contacted by a Nigerian Prince who needs my help and bank account details to secure his inheritance."

- basicdesires

"Me too!"

"As a fellow Nigerian I almost feel offended. Why don’t they want my money?"

- Butterfly_hues

"I got my first Nigerian prince when I was like 11 on Skype. I feel like I was ahead of the game."

- hunybuny9000

"This happened to me for the first time last month!"

"I was so excited! It was just another internet legend to me before that, I feel so privileged to have been included! 😂😂"

- lumoslomas

Sitting This One Out

"One time I was making fun of my ex and a friend because I had never 'sharted.' Within the week I was sick and I sharted."

"So I will not be playing this game."

- cheesehuahuas

A Rite Of Passage

jump driving GIFGiphy

"Hitting a deer. I live in a tiny northern area and it's almost like a rite of passage to hit a deer."

" it's definitely going to happen."

- eddiethreegates

"You're lucky."

"I hit one head-on about a month ago. Just got my car back a few days ago. Been driving less than a year. It was terrifying."

- Ornery-Definition373

"Dude, I was like you once. 15 years of driving and never hitting a deer."

"Then 2020 and suddenly out of nowhere a deer f*cked up the front of my car. Then 2021 and a f*cking deer hit the side of my car."

"Waiting to see where the f*ckers are going to hit this year."

- CylonsInAPolicebox

Words of Wisdom

"I never had my wisdom teeth (third molars) removed."

"All four came in, fit well, doing fine. Whenever I see a new dentist, they’re always surprised. I also never had braces."

"These may be related."

- Sad_Box_1167

"I somehow have no wisdom teeth whatsoever."

- Ecstatic_Brother_259

"I have never been more happy for my cinderblock caveman head than I was when all of my wisdom teeth came in perfectly fine."

"I might have to order my motorcycle helmets online, but I could chew the sh*t out of some animal bones if I really needed to, and you just can't put a price on that."

- memekid2007

Feeling Lied To

"According to the D.A R.E program I was forced to take in 5th grade, I expected more strangers to offer me free drugs than the 0 times it's happened."

- DisforLysdexia

"D.A.R.E. gave me unrealistic expectations about how friendly drug dealers would be."

"No one came to offer me drugs. I live in a state where weed is not legal. I do not have social skills."

"How am I ever supposed to find it!"

"That should be a separate AskReddit. How do you find a weed guy if you have no social skills?"

- Tastyfeesh


"I completely missed the entire lockdown. 2020 was a normal year for me."

"I never stopped working at my job in a warehouse and I lived alone. I only have time to go out to the store anyways so I feel like I almost missed out on something."

- Fenderman420

"Same here! The best part was no traffic, it was a breeze getting from point A to point B."

- hotbriochedameron

"Same here."

"I work in IT for a hospital, not allowed to WFH. I couldn't take vacation in 2020 or 2021 so 2 straight years of work and commuting. I feel like the quarantine was a big inside joke I wasn't part of."

- GothWitchOfBrooklyn


Super Troopers Police GIFGiphy

"Never have been stopped by a police officer for any reason and have never had a parking ticket."

- Back2Bach

"Never been stopped for a reason either."

"Been stopped for no reason plenty of times though. I must be one suspicious looking mofo."

- Mad_Aeric

"It's your car dude."

"I drove a beat up 15 year old car and got pulled over once a month. This happened to me for over 2 years."

"Changed cars to a newer one and then never got stopped again."

- imightneedhelp101

I'm A Loser, Baby

"I have never won anything. Like a contest, raffles, drawings, races, etc."

"You'd think by now something would have happened."

- mothershipq

"I was 35 when I won my first anything."

"It was a glass tea infuser bottle Stash tea held a giveaway for on Instagram. A week after it arrived it fell off my desk and shattered into a zillion pieces."

"I wasn't meant to be a winner, apparently."

- cleverdylanrefrence

"Me either. Losers for life! Lol"

- OkConsideration2808

"I won one raffle ever. And it was for a lotto ticket."

"The lotto ticket was not a winning ticket, so did I really win?"

- Recreatedassociation

Every Woman

"Urinary tract infection and yeast infections. Every woman I know has had them. Not me."

"It's strange because I'm always dehydrated. I was severely dehydrated a month ago, but it's all good now."

"I'm 60."

- Vast-Classroom1967

"My mother is 73 and has never had either infection."

"I, on the other hand, seemed to keep a yeast infection in my early 20's and have had multiple UTIs."

"I am 50 now and things are much better."

- iamsuperkathy

You're up, folks.

It's your turn. What seems to happen all the time, just not to YOU?

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