They say there's no use crying over spilled milk, but that doesn't mean there's no use in saying something to diffuse the tension.
When something goes horribly wrong, a comment that comes out of left field or a quippy comment can make everyone feel better.
Once a particular comment proves effective, there's also no real reason to look for something else. Instead, the aforementioned comment becomes your go-to.
In order to find out what those effective comments are, Redditor CruelHandLucas asked:
"What is your favorite thing to say when something goes terribly wrong?"
It's A Story
"This is good for the plot."
"I always say "It's just a part of the character development""
"whenever something goes completely the wrong way i think “ooooh plot twist”"
"“Let’s start again, but this time with feeling,” is one of my favorites."
"I want this on my gravestone"
I Meant To Do That!
"One time when I used to work in a kitchen the head chef accidentally clipped the chip/fries bowl where you dump freshly cooked chips/fries to season them and sent it flying across the kitchen and crashing to the floor with the clang that only stainless steel kitchenware can emit. Without missing a beat he went "I'll just pop that there for a sec" totally deadpan and turned back to the counter by the passe where he was finishing plating some dishes. Something about the humour of it cut through all the chaos of the busy kitchen and I was in tears of laughter. 10 years later I still say "I'll just pop that there for a sec" any time I knock something over, no one else seems to find it as funny as I do but it still entertains me."
"In my kitchen when someone drops a plate or anything its mandatory for someone to tell them “that doesnt go there”"
"Sometimes before things even hit the ground I'll proclaim "Take that, floor!""
""Well that's not ideal, it's it?""
"Best friend is British. When we play golf and she hits a bad shot she just says, "well that's unfortunate." And I love it."
"i usually just shout “BIT SAD INNIT” in a British accent."
"…. My friends hate me"
"YES, QUITE BLOODY MISERABLE, I MUST SAY"
Show No Emotion
"With a neutral expression, and unemotionally."
"I do that but I say “Joy. Deep joy.” Completely deadpan lol."
You Never Saw Me. You Never Even Knew Me.
"I was never here"
"I was never given a name"
Stopped Too Soon
"I picked a hell of a week to stop sniffing glue"
"Whadda week to stop shooting shark adrenaline."
– Deleted User
"Ah gee scoob..."
Those Cartoon Responses
"Great googly moogly"
"I'm with this or "Oh bother" like pooh"
Not The Status Quo
""This is homophobic" (I'm fruity) Or "This is not what I want, this is not what I planned, and I just gotta say I do not understand""
Short And Sweet
"Awww shiet! (Marcus Phoenix's Gears of War voice)"
Not Sure That Will Help
"Say “kick it now” after someone drops something"
"Depends on how pissed off I am. If I’m particularly irritated, I go with over the top sarcasm. Specifically, “F(ck yeah. I LOVE when that happens. It makes me so. F*cking. HORNY!”"
So, Not Actually OK
"If it's one of my underlings I just say "it's OK no big deal, you're fired, but it's OK""
That's Always True!
"Well, it could have been worse."
Anyone Else Suddenly Craving Ice Cream?
"What the double mint chocolate chip fuck?"
"If someone else made a mistake:"
"Have you tried doing it properly?"
My New Line
"It's something I picked up from the senior engineer I worked with a couple decades ago. He had a much better delivery."
"One time me and my friends got into an accident and I said “Omg slay”. I wasn’t invited out again."
All Eyes On Me
"I like to pause time with a loud record scratch and say "yup. That's me. I bet you're wondering how I got here.....""
Sometimes, when things go horribly wrong, all you want to do is bang your head against the wall...sometimes, until you knock yourself unconscious.
Or, maybe you want to scream and cry and hide in a corner.
However, finding something fun to say may be the best response...and the best way to de-stress and move on.