Top Stories
Roommate Horror Stories

Roommate Horror Stories

The Most Disgusting Work Stories As Told By Employees

The Most Disgusting Work Stories As Told By Employees

Scarred For Life: "I Wasn't Meant To See That"

Scarred For Life: "I Wasn't Meant To See That"

Unforgettably Creepy Moments

Unforgettably Creepy Moments

These Entitled Jerks Made Us Rage

These Entitled Jerks Made Us Rage

Unbelievably Entitled People

Unbelievably Entitled People

Ex-Cons Explain What Their Time in Prison Was Really Like

Ex-Cons Explain What Their Time in Prison Was Really Like
Photo by Emiliano Bar on Unsplash

Let's face it, jail is the last place you would want to wind up.

Former convicts who have been sentenced to time in prison can vouch for the harrowing stories of violence that are often depicted on film and TV.

But in addition to the savage attacks and violence that are commonplace while in the slammer, ex-cons could also recall being tormented by extreme boredom and eating inadequate portions of bland food.

Canned fruit, cream of wheat, and unsweetened grits, anyone? Yum.

The following former inmates described what life was like during their time in confinement, and shared their stories when Redditor Between3N20Karakters asked:

"For those of you who have been to prison/jail what is it like?"

Their unnerving recollections will remind you that being on the straight and narrow will always be better than the alternative.

The Friendly Murderer

"In prison in Colorado I was roomed with a guy who killed his wife and her lover and split his own throat yet he was a really nice person to me. There are gangs of every variety and it was hard."

– BlaZenDaBomb

Endless Reading

"24 days in county in Florida. I read 27 books while I was there. I didn't get my first book till my third day. It's an indescribable level of boredom. I only stopped reading when I could no longer find a comfortable position for myself. I also wrote about 40 pages of notes/diary entries, which is something I had never done before."

– wildbillesq

Poop Shy

"I'll just tell one story. I went in thinking I would be out in no time. I was in a cell block with about 12 other guys. There was a common area and individual cells. I was really shy about pooping in front of others, so I held it. For like 2 days. On the second or third day I couldn't hold it. So I waited until I thought everyone else was distracted in the common, went quietly to my cell, shut the door as much as I could without latching it, and sat down."

"About 5 seconds later the door comes blowing open, and in walk every single person in my cell block. They all formed a semi circle around me, arms folded, demanding I finish my sh*t while they watch. So there I sat, pooping, in front of 12 strangers. It was horrible. But I have literally no poop shyness any more. So silver lining I guess."

– level1biscuit

The Farm Pit

"It's not quite 'traditional' jail and doesn't last quite as long, but I found it far far worse..."

"I was arrested back in the mid 80s in my youth, living in the former soviet union in eartern europe, and served 8 hours in the 'Farm Pit.' Basically just a concrete pit at a factory farm that's empty when you go in, but then they shovel in pig sh*t as the pigs produce it..."

"I thought I was getting off light with a one-day punishment...but honestly it's been almost 35 years and I'm still a wee bit traumatized from it and still feel some anxiety when I see a pig farm, even in a movie. I never knew anything could smell or feel THAT bad."

– slimepferd

The Ignored Prisoner

"50 days in Macomb County Jail. Mt. Clemens, MI."

"Cold. Boring. Smells like bleach and feet. The worst part was hearing a guy screaming for the deputies because his chest hurt. They ignored him. He had a heart attack, and died a few feet from me."

– yojohnnya

The Detailed Account of Life Behind Bars

"I've had multiple stays at county jails in TX. Every minute of it sucks. Having your freedom stripped from you is a terrible experience, even if you know you won't be in long."

"I visited my dad in prison when I was a kid and one thing that stuck with me from then to the time that I went to jail, was the smell. All jails/prisons seem to have the same funky a** BO/mildew smell."

"In county jail the food is horrible and they give you just enough nutrients to survive. People think that everyone works out but it's hard to have energy or build muscle with the amount of food they give you. You have to be able to make commissary to get more food.

"'Commissary is very necessary'. In county it can be prohibitively expensive for a lot people, packs of ramen go for like $1/each. In state prison, they feed you more and commissary is cheaper. You can also get items not in county jail like sodas and ice cream."

"Depending on where you're at you will most likely be grouped with offenders who have done similar level crimes. Meaning non-violent housed with non-violent offenders and vise versa. There are times this isn't true. Even though I was in on a non-violent driving offense, I was housed with people on trial for armed robbery, murder, attempted murder. I'm not sure why I was put in that tank, I don't have any history of violence. Maybe it's the way I look, idk. One of the murderers was actually a really nice guy (to me anyways) and I got along with him well. We discussed philosophy and played chess everyday."

"Being sick in jail is terrible. Medical care is highly lacking. If you're sick they give you a couple Advil per day and that's it."

"Mental illnesses are rampant. Some people are on their meds and stable, others have conditions that are undiagnosed and untreated but clearly off their rocker."

"Pathological liars are everywhere."

"Everyone is innocent. Everyone is a big time drug dealer. Everyone is a hard as f'k gangster. You get really tired of hearing people talk about all the money and sh*t they have out in the world but they're asking you for a shot of coffee because they don't have money on their books."

"Coffee, stamps and ramen works like currency. You can buy different things/services from other inmates. I used to draw, fill out paperwork, write letters and file motions for other dudes to help pass the time."

"Daytime TV is the most obnoxious sh*t ever and you will gain a new found hatred for it in jail. Dudes will be gathered around the tv watching The View arguing over the dumbest sh*t."

"In the showers, sandals are required. If you go barefoot in the shower you will end up with a f'ked up foot infection. I once saw a dude coming off heroin lay down on the floor in the shower. I wanted to puke. There's years of caked on germs on those shower floors and walls."


"Jailhouse snitches and thieves are hated. If you get caught stealing, you better hope you can fight because you will get f'ked up on sight over a couple packs of noodles."

"There's probably more but those are the main things I think people don't realize about jail."

– mangolimon3

Never Admit to Being Suicidal

"Try to sleep as much as possible, cuz it's not pleasant to be awake in a room filled with cots and a variety of random strangers, some of whom are cool while others are scary. There's a hierarchy so if ur lucky u will locate and secure a buddy near ur cot who offers to show u the ropes and let's u use her shampoo and wants to play cards. Do not tell the intake nurse the truth if she asks u if u have ever been suicidal, cuz I was long ago, and since I answered honestly i was sent to solitary confinement where I had to be buck naked with all lights on 24 hrs a day and no blankets, only paper towel thing and camera on u with creepy perverted guard watching u all night long"

– BonaFideHoe

Narrowly Escaping Death

"My a brother was in prison, he was almost beaten to death by guards. He still won't talk about it and it's been over 20yrs."

– Satanfan

Keep Your Head Down

"Been in a number of US jails. Food quality varies, but generally you'll be hungry from dinner (~6pm) till breakfast (6am). Usually you can get some commissary items by trading desserts or playing poker (if you're good at it). Most of my time is spent sleeping and reading books, some people prefer TV and you often don't get to choose what's on. I've generally been in minimum security so haven't seen many fights, but I've been on cell blocks where someone's freaking out for over an hour, and this inevitably happens around midnight when you're trying to sleep. Mostly I've learned to keep my head down and do as the officers say."

"The beds suck, the food sucks, and you're inside at least 23 hours a day. 3/10 would not recommend."

– Absurdthinker

Solitary Confinement

"8 days in solitary confinement was one of the worst experiences of my life. 23 hours in a cell one hour out to walk the pod and shower. Lights on for 16 out for 8. No blanket no books, noting that could possibly be put in the toilet to clog it and flood the cell to get out for a little while (apparently that was a problem). I begged for a bible (atheist) or anything to keep my mind occupied and was refused. 1/10 would not recommend."

– wrngwycorrigan

Highlights Include LSD

"The longest I have ever done was 90 days in a very small jail. Boring 90 days at most we had like 17 inmates including DOC and females. I played alot of spades. Watched alot of stupid things on tv ( real housewives holy f'k). We usually had cigarettes smuggled in from the road crew so that was cool. My cellmate was in a PC programme and he was on trial for murder. The dude was annoying as f'k. The highlights of my sentence include tripping in LSD for the first time ever, and burning books in the shower cause it eas winter and it was f'king cold."

– StereotypicalTrash

Bored Burglar

"Very small town jail for a weekend stay at 18 yrs old. Booorriiinnngggg. Eat. Sleep. Get hassled from Barney Fife. They left the cel door open during the day. We had to mop the floor (hell maybe we volunteered), got to check out the library in the jail....no blanket party, no tats."

"Pretty easy time all told. Which I guess makes up for being arrested for 2nd degree Burglary for stealing a mattress out of a unoccupied TENT at a girl scout camp in the mountains. In all fairness a tent is considered a dwelling, so yeah, I was a burgler."

"Yeup, don't do the crime if you don't want the time or whatever."

– Bcruz75

Family Support

"Honestly it's not too bad by itself. We were all kind of like a family there. The worst part for me was just how uninformed I was. I had no idea how long I was going to be there and no idea what was going to happen to my house and job. Luckily it all worked out thanks to my friends and family. I feel truly bad for people who dont have people to look out for them. I just couldn't imagine."

– noodles_the_food

Backed Up For Six Days

"I was in Appomattox jail for 6 days. The arrival process is pretty humiliating. They strip you, make you bend over cough, squat and cough, than shower while watching. Their policy is first 24 hours confined. I was lucky and had a pretty nice roommate. In the cell the toilet is annoyingly close to the bunk bed. There were two common shower areas in the main area walkway. The food sucked. Mostly it's just so damn boring. TVs were on when we could go to the common area but you could barely hear them. We got sent to our rooms for every little thing like getting too loud. One fight broke out but mostly things were chill. I swear somehow I did not poop for the entire time....My body was like .nope. Worst part is they messed up my sentence because of sloppy handwriting. I was supposed to only be held a day. I wouldn't have even had to change my clothes just stay in the courthouse holding cell. I later went to court over it and had my fines and community service dropped."

– TheCUTESTofB0RG

From Your Site Articles
Related Articles Around the Web
prison

People Who Witnessed A Teacher Break Down In Tears Share Their Experiences

Reddit user throwthrowwthrowwww asked: 'Students who've witnessed their teacher cry during class, what happened?'

Apple on a stack of textbooks
Element5 Digital/Unsplash

Teachers are not only educators, they're also inspiring leaders.

The most memorable teachers are those who genuinely encourage young students to do their best so they can be empowered to pursue their dreams.

However, we tend to revere them to such a degree, we forget that they're people too with real emotions.

Curious to hear from strangers who witnessed a vulnerable moment from someone they were inspired by at an early age, Redditor throwthrowwthrowwww asked:

"Students who've witnessed their teacher cry during class, what happened?"

There's no bigger heartbreak than people who are struggling with illnesses or know of someone facing medical challenges.

Ailing Teacher

"One of our music instructors 7th-12th grade. She had a long ongoing battle with stage three/four cancer. She always did her best to try to have fun during our classes, like it was an escape for her because she loved music so much. Over 85% of the entire high school joined choir because of her. Her chemo and radiation treatments left her exhausted some days, though, and she would occasionally break down. In 2012, when her condition worsened, she would have to take more days off because the cancer had become so debilitating."

"We continued to practice our songs while she was gone, and I swear we would sometimes spend an hour on one small section of a song, ripping every note apart, and repeating the same words over and over until we couldn't mess it up. One of the final days in class with her, I remember we were rehearsing for our upcoming state competition, and we sounded damn good. Mid-song, she stopped conducting, closed her eyes, folded her hands, and listened as we continued singing for her. The energy and sound was so profound throughout the room, I can't find the words to describe it."

"After the song finished, we stood in a long, complete silence before she opened her eyes with tears streaming down her face. She wasn't able to go to our state competition with us, but we ended up placing that year. It wasn't first like we were hoping, but it was the highest the school had ever placed. She later passed away that same year. She was one of the strongest women I had ever met in my life."

– Top-Box2372

Losing A Student

"My high school Spanish teacher also taught some homebound students with medical issues."

"One day the vice principal came into our class and told Ms J that one of her homebound students had passed away from his cancer. She couldn't hold back the tears."

– que_he_hecho

Wise Toddler

"I’m a teacher, I cried in front of my toddlers when I got a call from the hospital telling me it was time to make the call as to whether to pull my dads life support. One of my toddlers came up to me while I was crying, put her hand on my cheek and said 'it’s ok to feel sad, it’s ok to cry,' then gave me a hug. I love my job."

– Cheekygirl97

Students witnessed the following teachers get emotional.

Thoughtful Sixth-Graders

"The class surprised him on teacher appreciation day. Someone brought pop, snacks etc. He was surprised. 6th grade teacher."

– Stephlynn1234

Appreciation Day

"Had a philosophy course in uni during covid. So the class was held on zoom. It wasn't teacher appreciation day, but it was the second to last lecture of the term and we all really enjoyed this prof (and because of him most of the class became friends). So we organized an appreciation thing for him."

"We all started class without our cameras on, which was unusual and made him question (he got sad actually). So one girl said 'before we start, we just really wanted to do something for YOU because you've done so much for us. I hope this is okay.' He gave us a confused look, and before he could say anything in response we all turned our cameras on and held up signs saying 'thank you professor [name]' and our green screen backgrounds were of his face lol. He laughed so hard but started crying. Told us how he wished we could do this in person and that he genuinely cared about all of us."

"He had a lot of health issues, the most prominent one being MS. Whenever he didn't start class on time we all got worried, and there were a few times where he cancelled altogether because he fell or something. He also had a cat, and we asked to see him just enough times that his cat learned what time our class was at and would climb up to see us and stay the whole class. It was cute. During the breaks he would email a link to play chess since he lived far from his family and couldn't visit and wanted the company. We organized a Christmas movie day with him over the Christmas break and he loved it. He retired after the following year because of his health, and I still wonder what he's doing now and if he's doing okay. I've been in uni for 5 years now and he is the only prof I've actually spoken to consistently and genuinely liked."

– Burnt_Your_Toast

Sad Literature

"5th grade teacher reading Where the Red Fern Grows out loud to the class. He shed some tears. He did every year."

– SnoBunny1982

"Our teacher read that book to us in 5th grade also. But when it got to that part, she elected me to read it and she left the room. Luckily I had read it before and knew what was coming, but it was still rough."

– MIBariSax81

The Private Life Of An English Teacher

"I forgot his name, but he was one of my favored teachers in high school. He taught English."

"During class, he was called out to talk to some members of the school administration and a few proctors. It took several minutes. But he returned, taught as much of the class as he could, and then just walked over to his desk and started crying. Whimpering. He then left."

"He just found out his wife, who had also been a teacher, was having an affair with one of the female students. We didn't find out that specific fact until later on though."

– Typical_Samaritan

Some students, however, can force a teacher to realize they're in the wrong profession.

Bad Attitude

"Student that had behavior issues and a hard time maintaining emotional regulation threw his recorder (the instrument) at the music teacher and it snapped in half. He then threw his desk in her direction and walked out. This was 3rd grade, and all she had asked him to do was listen to the song we were learning. She quit the next week after almost 30 years of teaching."

– Last_Tuesdays_Beans

Bullying The Substitute

"Ms. Hanlon... Substitute teacher, I still think about her and hope she's doing well. She was posted as the teacher when the usual teachers were off sick. Absolutely zero respect was given to her and the class knew if we had Ms. Hanlon it was just an extended lunch, we could just mess around and act like animals for the whole lesson."

"She had physical conditions like a dent in her forehead and a gravvely voice which prevented her from being able to raise her voice to tell us to be quiet. So the kids would all do Hunchback of Notre Dame impressions, spitballs through straws and do the 'coughing game' where they would just cough through whatever she was trying to say."

"Even as a kid I felt kinda awful after we'd essentially broken her and she'd just come in not even say hello and pull open a book for the hour and sometimes cry into it. I weirdly still think about her randomly once or twice a month, I hope she moved on to way better things. School children really have no filter at all."

– PNCL

Absolutely Zero Respect

"Substitute teacher in Jr High must be among the world's worse jobs. 8th grade we had a sub that demanded and got no respect. Kids would throw stuff at her etc. She left the classroom crying then the vice principal, who was not to be messed with, came in and took over."

– woolash

Major Mockery

"I had a substitute teacher named Mr. Crane who looked exactly like Ichabod Crane from the old cartoon. Some kids in the class bullied him relentlessly for this and he just kind of broke down one day. Poor guy."

– backflip10019

In seventh grade, I witnessed a classmate talk back to our homeroom teacher and saying very inappropriate, bullish things to her in front of the whole class.

But that didn't make her cry.

What made her tear up was when another student defended her and yelled at the bullying student for being out of line.

teachers

People Divulge The Dumbest Reasons Their Friends Ever Ended Up On The News

man in black crew neck shirt
Amanna Avena on Unsplash

It can be a pleasant and exciting surprise to see a friend or family member show up on the evening news.

Particularly if it is a story showcasing their accomplishments or allowing them to let their voice be heard on an important issue.

Of course, showing up on the news isn't always a joyous occasion.

Indeed, some people tune in to find their friends and family on the news for reasons they might hope people will eventually forget down the line.

Redditor Miguenzo was eager to hear stories of a loved one making the evening news for less than brag-worthy stories, leading them to ask:

"What’s the dumbest reason somebody you know landed on the 6 o’clock news?"

15 Minutes, Or Four Seconds, Of Fame...

"Years back, there was a college scholarship scam going on here."

"These companies would go to high schools and do a presentation, and grift parents into paying a large sum for the company to help get a scholarship."

"My mom took one look at this and was like, 'this is a scam'."

"My uncle bought it hook, line and sinker and paid up."

"And received absolutely nothing."

"So he calls our news program and they do a feature with this company in their 'hall of shame.'"

"My uncle was absolutely THRILLED."

"'They interviewed me for 4 hours!'"

"'It's going to be huge!'"

"We all sit around the TV."

"It's February 2000."

"Boom, there's my uncle!"

"They do the lead-in..and then, there's my uncle saying..."

"'They said, uh, sue 'em'."

"My uncle is screaming."

"'What the Hell?! They were at my house for 4 hours!'"

"We still have it on VHS somewhere."

"My uncle's star moment over in seconds."- JKW1988

Episode 19 News GIF by The SimpsonsGiphy

Preserved For Posterity...

"My college roommate got stuck in an infant swing at a public park and firefighters had to use some type of Jaws of Life contraption to cut the swing down and cut her out of it."- Nocomt

Oops!

"I know a guy who was interviewed on camera up in the mountains where there was a forest fire."

"He had been up there fishing with his girlfriend."

"He was married."- Fezig

Close Call

"Dude was swimming laps in a lake after dinner (i.e., around sunset)."

"Predictably, he got bit by an alligator."

"I saw him on the news, shirtless in true Floridaman fashion, with a little bandage over each tooth mark."

"The bandages made a dotted line around his shoulder and chest in the shape of an alligator's mouth, like he was in a cartoon or something."- BigRedRobotNinja

Tiere Bis Unters Dach Swimming GIF by SWR KindernetzGiphy

Unpaid Extra

"There was a park nearby that had no drainage and was bowl shaped."

"So if it rained hard, this baseball park/ football field turned into a mini lake."

"It rained a lot one day and the news did a story just showing how much it rained, and in the background behind the news-woman, from out of frame you see my friend rowing past her in a kayak."- hook_killed_pan

Right Place At The Right Time?

"A fight broke out at a HS football game."

"Turned into a huge brouhaha.'

"They intervened this dumba** friend of mine on the local news, the only bit that made it into the broadcast was him saying 'For the first time in my life I was happy to see cops!'"- KneeDragr

Awww...

"Marrying their pet goldfish in an underwater ceremony, complete with a wedding gown and guests in scuba gear."- Candies-For-You

Illustration Swimming GIF by Ordinary NadeeGiphy

Strike!

'A childhood friend’s dad embezzled money from the local Little League team."- Key-Zebra-4125

How Did He Even Make It To The Freezer?

"An ex boyfriend of my best friend’s sister ended up on the news for breaking into a Checkers through the drive through window and locking himself in the freezer until the cops arrived and arrested him."- pineapple3712·

Ice Cream Snack GIF by My/Mochi Ice CreamGiphy

Setting An Example...

"I got filmed and aired sticking a swab up my nose at drive thru covid testing."

"I had just declined to be interviewed at my car because I was afraid of getting someone sick."

"Test was negative, and my sister got a new pic for my contact profile on her phone."- idiotsavant419

Criminals Don't Ususally Wait In The Check Out Line...

"My friend was going to target with his mom to buy a tv."

"They stopped at Starbucks in the store."

"When the worker asked what the wanted he said “'he money in the register see' like an old timey gangster, then laughed ordered and payed for their coffee and went into target."

"While they were pushing their cart with a tv in it to the check out line the swat team surrounded them and arrested him for armed robbery.. was on the news."

"Got charged and everything."

"The first hearing the barista could not point him out and the judge threw out the case."- MACHOmanJITSU

Returning To The Scene Of The Crime...

"A guy from my high school stole Michael Jackson's glove from the Motown Museum in Detroit MI in early 90s."

"He returned it."

"I knew it had to be him, and yep, it was."

"I remembered him because he dressed like Michael Jackson every single day of school for years."

"He did it really well, too."

"He also didn't talk much."

"So, I was surprised to see him talking to a TV reporter about it."

"I hope he's doing well."- ATK80k

Animated GIFGiphy

Some people crave their 15 minutes of fame and embrace it however it may come.

Others only hope that no one they knew happened to be watching their local news that night...

Even though they know deep down that all their friends have it on their DVR and are never planning to erase it...


evening news

Men Break Down The Weirdest Things Someone's Ever Said To Them After Sex

white pillows and bed comforter
Priscilla Du Preez 🇨🇦 on Unsplash

People say the darndest things after -- and sometimes during -- lovemaking.

Maybe it's the euphoria.

Maybe it's the adrenaline.

Maybe it's the tequila.

It's always good to have a kind-hearted joke on hand or a generic compliment.

Or maybe just grab your belongings and skedaddle.

Redditor ella-es-julia wanted to hear about the craziest pillow talk stories, so they asked:

"Men of Reddit: What's the weirdest thing a girl said to you after sex?"

The weirdest I ever got was... "What city am I in again?"

Geography matters.

Morbid Much?

In Bed Home GIFGiphy

"Met girl, went on date, brought girl home, had the sex, finished the sex, laying there she says 'What would you do if I died right now?' and demanded an actual answer."

Vixxay

Meow

"Not to me, but as she walked over to the bathroom after the deed, she said 'I just did your owner' to my cat. Sexiest thing that ever happened to me."

shlanky369

"My Fiancé and I were about to start going at it when the cat appeared from under the bed and stared at me. I went, 'Babe the cat is here. I don't like how he's staring at my boobs."

"Fiancé grabbed the cat and yeeted him into the hallway with the phrase, 'Get out you weird pervert.'"

"The cat proceeded to (without his claws) smack the door over and over again while screaming for a few minutes straight. Pervert."

Trumpet6789

POP!

"'I need you to take me to the hospital. Something is now bleeding and hurts.'"

"Turns out her ovarian cyst popped. We're still together with the running joke of sex so good it put her in the ER."

DasBatt

"Ah ah ah, 2 hemorrhagic cysts ruptured, I was bleeding internally, but only a little bit. I'm still impressed by how quickly you went from a naked sex stupor to being ready and carrying me to the car. Good times."

"In the ER when they asked me what happened all I could do was shout 'we were f**kin!' through my tears. That memory still makes me laugh."

Straystar-626

Damn it's Good

"We were going at it for some time then her face went instantly from 'damn it's good' to full-on crying. I stop, ask her what's wrong and she tells me 'I can't cheat on my boyfriend, it is wrong.'"

"So this is when I learned that the girl that I met on a dating website and that I started seeing 3 weeks before and that she told me she was single had a boyfriend for over 5 years. Got her to talk more, and she told me she was on the dating website to see if there were guys better than her boyfriend so she could end up with someone better."

"This was like 20 years ago, a coworker I have right now knows her (his girlfriend is like a distant relative of hers) and I learned she had 5 different boyfriends since then, cheated on all of them except the last one (for now). She was also a cam model in secret, one of the boyfriends was a high-paying customer."

draftstone

A Binding Contract

"'Pleasure doing sex business with ya.' We then shook hands."

"Still together 5 years later!"

Tatarstan

It's nice when people who have great sex make great partners.

And it all starts with a handshake.

Sleep on It

“'I don’t usually say this but, yeah, you can stay.'"

lennyukdeejay

"Did you high-five after that? Seems like that statement called for it."

EvilNinjaX24

"This is the best one."

TomKhatacourtmayfind

Tiny Dancer

"Not really weird but I slept with this girl while backpacking Asia, she was also a backpacker. After a bit of chillin'/talking, I got up to get dressed, she looked at my flaccid manhood and said 'You're quite shy when you're not excited.' I thought it was hilarious."

fleetwoodsackk

"That's a much better way to put it. My wife, when we were just dating and had moved in together and eventually saw it flaccid just said 'Aww, it's so little.' Thanks, hun, exactly what every guy wants to hear."

striker180

Fine!

"She said 'If I get pregnant I'm keeping it.' I was dumbfounded and when I didn't respond quickly enough she got really agitated like I had hurt her feelings and yelled 'Fine! You don't have to be involved if you don't want to!'"

"We had just met that night. My condom use skyrocketed after that night."

Fullyme

"When I was a poverty-stricken college student I was banging a girl who said, 'If you get me pregnant I’ll take you for everything you own.' I said, 'All I own is my bicycle. You want that?'”

OrwellWasRight101

Amen

"Best weird compliment I ever got was 'Damn boy, you f**k like the Devil!'"

"I married her, we still goin' at it."

BeBearAwareOK

Well, these certainly created some lasting relationships... or hilarious tales to tell their friends.

Do you have any stories to share? Let us know in the comments below.

sex

The Absolute Weirdest Compliments People Have Ever Received

woman in black pants and red tank top
Jakayla Toney on Unsplash

Giving compliments is pretty easy, although most of us don't do it often enough.

Accepting compliments can be much harder.

Too many of us immediately shift into disclaimers to explain why we don't deserve the praise.

But we just need to say thank you—even if the compliment is a little odd.

Keep reading...Show less
life