
Ever think about how even the smallest of actions can have significant consequences in life?
This notion of unpredicable consequences is typically known as the Butterfly Effect, which is defined as causing a non-linear impact on complex systems.
Strangers online shared their examples of the Butterfly Effect when Redditor SidneyRL asked:
"What's the craziest butterfly effect that happened to you because of a small decision you made?"
These Redditors wouldn't be here today were it not for the Butterfly Effect.
It Started With A Potty Decision
"Decided I would rather use my bathroom than a portapotty. Found my wife cheating, she attempted suicide, I moved multiple states away. In the 7 years since I have made nothing but positive changes and went from $18/hour laborer to a well respected person in my profession making 6 figures. I'd probably still be working that dead-end job."
"Aside from that, without recounting all the details; I went to see a doctor about a splinter from chopping firewood, 6 months later they removed most of my kidney with Renal Cell Carcinoma. Without the splinter I'd likely be dead from kidney cancer."
– Atomic_ad
What Would've Been A Fatal Appointment Date
"I had to call my heart surgeon to give him my new insurance #s (I had only just gotten them because the person who had them had the flu and was not getting back to me) as soon as I got my numbers, I called surgeon - the receptionist said, 'oh, hey, we just had a cancelation for this Friday, do you want it?' Of course I wanted to get it over and not wait another month. decided to take the open heart surgery cancelation appointment (a month before my actual appointment), and well, surgeon said that thank goodness I did because once he got a look inside, he realized I would not have survived to the original appointment date."
"So, if the insurance lady didn't have the flu, I would have gotten those numbers a lot sooner, and never gotten the offer to have the surgery when I did."
"Someone else's flu saved my life."
– myeggsarebig
Broken Guitar Strings
"So a few years back, I lived in Nice (South of France) for a while. As a musician I would make a bit of extra cash busking, and one day, I figured I'd go and busk at the promenade 'd'anglais by the sea. It's usually packed, and it just a generally pleasant place to be. I set up, played a couple of songs and was doing pretty well and making a decent amount of money. Then suddenly not one, but two of my guitar strings snapped (I even remember I was playing 'The Scientist' at the time)."
"I was massively gutted and decided to cut my losses early. I stormed off home (by the station) in a bit of a sulk at having to re-string my guitar and cutting short what was essentially one of my most productive days of busking since moving there. Literally one hour later, my phone starts to blow the f**k up with family and friends freaking out and asking if I was at the promenade."
"It was Bastille Day, 2016. The truck drove into the same crowd I was playing to, killing 86 people, including my at-the-time gf's uncle. I had two other friends who were amongst the 458 injured. I moved home the next month because it was too much, and haven't been back since."
"It's hard to explain, sometimes I think I was super lucky, sometimes I just kind of cry and wonder why I was lucky and others weren't. It's surreal, and despite what people think... it's a truly horrible feeling."
"Edit: I'm overwhelmed by the support of people. I will be getting therapy and hopefully in time I'll be able to return to Nice as it was one of my favourite places on earth. Take care of yourselves and if you've been through something similar, it looks like help is out there. Thank you all"
– haywhat
Spilt Coffee
"I spilled my coffee. I work in a bank and you learn never to do that, all the papers and files. You also learn to place it far enough away so it doesn't fill out anything if it does spill. I worked in finance for many years. It was 8: 43 in the morning and I figured I had enough time to get downstairs and get another cup and come back up before 9:00. So I went to the elevator bank. Waited for the elevator to come, It took a long time. Got in the elevator went down to the ground floor. I had my hand on the door leading outside to Liberty Street just as the first plane hit the first World Trade Center building on 9/11."
– smartaleky
Love found a way thanks to these inconsequential circumstances.
Endings And New Beginnings
"Made a last minute decision to go to a friend's divorce party and met my wife."
– anon
College Friends
"I decided to invite my chem lab partner to lunch on the first day of college, just to be friendly and try to make more than 1 friend at school. We met up with the only other friend I'd made at school so far. He thought my lab partner was cute, invited himself to hang out with her, and then fell in love with her roommate instead. He ended up married to the roommate - they've been together for 22 years and have 2 children."
– secondary_walrus
Teacher's Intuition
"In high school I took an intermediate biology course. I had never done biology before but was good at science generally so I thought the intermediate course would be a good fit."
"My science teacher of a couple year previous happened to walk into my class to talk to the biology teacher and she spotted me in the class."
"She asked me what grades I had got the previous year. I told her and she nodded and left. A minute later she came back in and asked me to gather my belongings and leave the class. I was pretty sure I was in trouble for something I couldn’t recall."
"She led me to another classroom and sat me down on an empty chair. Then she just started teaching. Turns out that she was running the advanced class that year and just decided to steal me as a student."
"I went on the take biology at undergrad level, and then a masters. I ended up doing a PhD in immunology and now work as an advisor for Pharma companies."
"It gets better though. I decided I wanted to do my masters in London, and met a girl on the way. We are now 10 years in and own a house together."
"All that because that teacher happened to look in my direction."
– MindOverEmotion
The Ultimate Prize
"Watched ‘who wants to be a millionaire’ and got so annoyed at the candidates not knowing a simple question about Katy Perry, that I applied. Got in. Got to play. Won a lot of money. Booked a holiday to a dream destination with that money. Met my husband there. We now have a 1 year old son :)"
– KartoffelSucukPie
You never truly know what's around the corner. Like, a family member you never knew existed.
Unexpected Reunion
"I had to renew the sticker on my license plate a couple of years ago and really didn't feel like sitting in the waiting room by myself forever so I told my mom I'd take her out to dinner after if she came with me.. The guy working at the counter turned out to be my moms long lost biological brother. If she hadn't come with me I would have never known."
– Mutchie
Cultural Roots
"My husband- He found out after 18 years that his moms side of the family was Spanish, not Mexican. He found this interesting and changed his country to 'Spain' on MySpace instead the US where he really was. Meanwhile in Australia, I was helping my friend find Spanish people to add as a friend as she was learning the language. I came across my now husband and decided to send him a friend request as well. We got along really well and met in person after 3 years. Have been together 11 years, married for 7. If he didn’t change his country to Spain (and only for a day or so) we’d never know each other existed."
– Naganofagano
Influential Reading Choice
"When I was in 8th grade (13 years old) I had a really long bus ride home so would pass the time by reading. One day I faced the very serious situation of nothing to read and a minute to grab something in the library, and for whatever reason I grabbed a book on astronomy. That book was amazing and grabbed me like nothing else had before. I remember being excited to realize every astronomer on Earth was 13 years old once too, and that was a career you could actually do, even if you were from Pittsburgh."
"Anyway, today I am a professional astronomer who studies gigantic space explosions for a living. There was a lot of work to get from that moment to this one, but I’m always grateful that I picked up that library book!"
– Andromeda321
When the smallest of changes lead to unpredictable and major consequences in life, it makes one wonder if there are such things as trivial acts.
The world just got more confusing.
If you or someone you know is struggling, you can contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255).
To find help outside the United States, the International Association for Suicide Prevention has resources available at https://www.iasp.info/resources/Crisis_Centres/
- This Theory That 'Star Trek: Voyager' Led To Barack Obama ... ›
- People Share The Most Interesting Domino Effects In History ›
- The Buffalo Bills Gave Us Kim Kardashian - George Takei ›
- People Share The Strangest Historical Cases Of The 'Butterfly Effect ... ›
It's never attractive to gloat.
Though every so often, we can't help boast about our accomplishments or the accomplishments of others.
Even so, it can get exhausting to hear others go on and on about a recent achievement.
Particularly if that achievement might not exactly be worth celebrating.
Indeed, some people are so inclined to brag about certain elements of their life, that they often don't stop to consider whether or not bringing attention to it is, in fact, a very good idea.
"What is something people brag about that they shouldn't?"
Over-Medicating
"How much xanax they took and posting it all over social media."
"So many people in my high school took xanax like it was candy and thought they were the sh*t."
"Like congrats, you're now a vegetable for a while."- slav_squat_98
Being Mean
"Treating people like sh*t."- thickredhead27
How Smart Are You?
"Their IQ, especially when they got it from an online IQ test."- captainmagictrousers
Hatred
"How much they hate their spouse yet stay together?"- holdmyicetea
Sleep Deprivation...
"How little they sleep."- NoSexAppealNeil
Questionable Perseverance...
"Going to work no matter how ill they are."- Reynoldssas
"Going back to work right away after having a baby."
"I had a boss that used to brag about not taking a day off even when each of his kids were born."
"I’ve met others that brag similarly."
"So, you are more dedicated to your job than your family?"
"Seems odd to me, but whatever."
"Do you."- Round-Goat-7452
But How Do You Really Feel?
“'I have no filter!'”
"I'm not talking about folks who, through no fault of their own, have difficulty with 'filtering'."
"This is about folks who are basically proclaiming that they're a**holes without saying that they're a**holes." - Reddit
If there's a trait anyone possesses which is most definitely brag worthy, it's having excellent self-awareness.
As they will know not to brag or boast about certain things.
But one should never expect those people to brag about anything.
They're too self-aware to do so.
Who hasn't on one occasion or another looked at someone with a svelte physique and become green with envy?
Wishing that we looked like them, and compelling us to hit the gym and lose a few pounds.
As such, we often roll our eyes when skinny folk complain about their weight and/or appearance.
But should we be throwing them the cold shoulder or offering a shoulder to cry on instead?
As maybe being skinny, by choice or simply genetics, might not be as easy or glamorous as it appears.
"What is the worst thing about being skinny?"
Lack Of Padding For Your Bones
"Its so easy to hit your pelvic bone on the side into things, and it hurts so much."- Lord_Botond
"My partner and I are both skinny."
"When we are intimate it often happens that it's just bone on bone which is not comfortable."
"Like this morning we where spooning. "
"I was the little spoon."
"And he had his arm resting on my hip."
"That's all it takes."
"There is just no soft cushion between us."- SnowdropWorks
Treated Like A Doll On A Shelf...
"People feel the need to just pick you up all the time."
"Put me down!"
"I don't care how strong you are!"- JBroms
More Noticeable Changes in Appearance
"People noticing every fluctuation in weight."- Own-Discussion5137
Cuddling Impaired
"Lap isn’t as comfy for dog to sit on."- DontStopMe_
"Do You Have This In My Size?"
"Finding pants that fit."- Vigothedudepathian
Unfair Assumptions...
"People assuming you have an eating disorder."- Sirens-Song69
We Can Squeeze You In
"As someone who was underweight in my childhood up to my early 20’s, and suddenly obese in my 30’, It doesn’t matter what weight you are, people will always have something to say about it."
"But one thing I HATED about being skinny, was always being the one to have to sit in the middle seat in the car."- Wild-Bee-7415
No Seatbelt Strong Enough
"It's easier to be tossed around in a fight."- meitz88
Always Needing To Bring A Cushion
"Going to an amusement park and realizing that no one else thinks the seats on the rides are too hard."
"I was in pain."- tiredfoodlover
As the saying goes, "the grass is always greener in someone else's yard."
Next time you're seated next to someone who doesn't seem to have an ounce of fat on their body, think twice before letting jealousy or judgement get the better of you.
Instead, maybe consider how lucky you are that the hard chair or bench you're sitting on is far more uncomfortable for them...
There are several prerequisites people might look for in a partner before agreeing to marry them.
Stable profession, where they see their future going, how well they get along with friends and family.
Then, of course, there's the matter of how they are in bed.
Something which might pose a problem should they find themselves dating someone who wants to hold off until after marriage.
Antiquated as the policy sounds, more people choose to abstain till marriage than one might imagine.
A policy which might not only prove problematic in finding a prospective fiancé, but could also be a potential deal breaker at the very start of the relationship.
One Redditor was curious to hear how people would react, or how they actually reacted, if their new romantic partner told them they wanted to abstain till after they got married, leading them to ask:
"If you were dating someone and if they said they don't want to have sex with you until they are married to you, how would you react?"
Depends On The Person
"My current boyfriend was like this."
"He wanted to wait until marriage."
"If it were anyone else, I would've dipped tf out."
"But for some reason, with him, I told him I'm willing to wait."
"Then a month passed into our relationship and he asked if we could have sex because he kept getting too turned on when we would do other stuff."
"Now 2years later, we have a healthy sex life and overall relationship lol."- acidic_crocodile
Will Only Wait So Long...
"I wouldn't mind waiting as long as they needed but I probably wouldn't get married to someone unless I knew we were also sexually compatible."- polywha
Love Is What Matters Most
"That was what my wife said to me."
"We would kiss and pet but not much more."
"I love her and what is important to her is important to me."
"She decided she wanted to after she figured out that I was serious about her and our relationship."
"We had sex about a year into the relationship, and we got married 4 years into the relationship."
"Someone saying that they want to wait till marriage might simply mean that they want to be with the person they are going to be with for the long term."
"You should always respect a person's boundaries and if their boundaries are not something you can respect, don't be with that person."
"It really is worth it, no matter who it is."
"And btw, we have been together since the late 80s and have both had boundaries that we respected, but it has always been worth it and i and glad to be her husband."
"This is my experience with the woman that I love and adore, I don't advocate thinking someone saying they want to wait is anything but straight up facts.
"If my wife wanted to wait the 4 years til marriage, i would have gladly."
"But since she did change her mind after figuring out i wasn't leaving, my statement of some might is accurate, but not all or probably most will change their minds."
"It is up to each person to decide if that is the situation they want to be in, but regardless, I think you should always respect the choices a person makes for themselves."
"Love and respect should always go together."- Equivalent_Ad8133
Details Needed...
"I would inquire about the reasoning, then act from there."
"I respect the choice, but I need to know the logic behind it if I'm going to commit to someone."- Blundell1992
That's A Dealbreaker...
"I would tell her that I am the wrong man for her and wish her all the best for her future."- Dense-Palpitation-55
Don't Knock It Till You've Tried It...
"This was my now wife."
"I'd been around the block a few times and had been with many partners."
"She was up front about it a few dates in."
"She came from a religious background and I definitely did not."
"At first I wasn't so sure."
"I agree with all the other comments here about sexual chemistry."
"However I found there was more open discussions around what each other liked and didn't like compared to previous relationships I've been in."
"Interestingly I felt a stronger connection with now wife then I did with previous gf's."
"Relationship is built around love and knowing each other and not just sex."
"We've been together for 8 years, married for 6."
"Have 2 kids and never had an argument."
"We made up for lost time after marriage.... Haha."
"If I had my time over, I'd do it exactly the same."- tuc_47
Be it for religious, personal, or no reason at all, a person's decision to wait till after marriage should always be respected.
If that's a dating deal-breaker, that's your decision, as much as theirs to abstain.
Though, you might want to delay your decision till after at least a date or two.
As you might find yourselves connecting in a way you've never connected with others.
And what good is sex without a connection?
No two people have the same sex drive.
There are those who simply can't get enough sex, as it is what empowers them and gives them purpose, such as the glorious Samantha Jones of Sex And The City.
Then there are those who could go days, weeks, months, even years without having even the tiniest sexual encounter, but live perfectly happy lives.
The proud asexuals.
Providing it is safe and consensual, there is no right and wrong when it comes to sex.
However, supposing one day two people had a classic Hollywood "meet cute", firmly believing it to be love at first sight, only to discover that one half of this prospective couple is asexual and the other is not.
What would their reactions be?
"Dear non-asexual people: if you were in a relationship with someone and they sat you down and said they are asexual, what would your reaction be?"
There Is Always A Solution
"This actually happened to me."
"My current partner told me about 3-4 years into our relationship that she realized she might be asexual."
"She told me that she'd realized since we'd been together that she'd often used sex as validation or because she thought she was supposed to."
"She'd been coming to the realization for a long time before she told me, and told me she was afraid of how I'd react."
"I'll preface my reaction by saying that we have never been monogamous, so things may have worked out differently if we were."
"I was not totally surprised."
"We tell each other everything, and I'd heard a lot about her previous partners."
"From what I gathered, I was her first long-term partner who wasn't abusive, pushy, or worse."
"I didn't feel like I'd disappointed her or turned her asexual in some way, I knew that she was telling me this because she felt comfortable that I wouldn't freak out or leave her."
"When we'd first started seeing each other I'd gone through a similar experience working up the courage to tell her I'm bi."
"The entire experience made us closer."
'That was years ago now, and we still very much love each other."
"We still have sex occasionally, but she's also fine if I seek it out elsewhere as long as I'm safe, always, and communicative, to a fault."
'Coming out to a partner is always difficult, regardless of what your sexuality is, or isn't."
"It's scary to think the person you love may feel differently about you afterward, but it's better than living a lie and letting it eat away at you."- Duckiesims
Just be Upfront
"i've been on a date with an asexual guy."
"He told me 1 hour into the date."
"I had nothing but respect for straight up telling me."
"I said I want sex to be a part of a relationship, he respected my choice and we had a great date."
"We were friends for long after that."- kaascheesefromage
Nope, Not Going To Work...
"Wish them well, find someone who shares my interests."- tacit_urn
Minor Detail...
"This actually happened to me."
"He was so much fun, that sex ultimately did not matter."
"We had 8 years together before he went I search of new adventures, but we stayed friends until his death."
"I still miss him."- Dang_It_All_to_Heck
An Insurmountable Hurdle
"I’ve been there."
"College boyfriend after about a year of dating told me that he thought he was asexual."
"We had been having sex until then, and it made me feel awful thinking that he might’ve not wanted to the entire time."
"I felt bad 'making' him do that."
"It was always consensual, but I was worried he only did it because he felt he had to."
"Some people can make a relationship without sex work, but this is what I personally did not want."
"I never shamed him for his lack of sexuality, but it made navigating the relationship more challenging."
"That relationship went on for at least another year, but ended up failing for a few reasons."
"I’m quite sexual, so that became a compatibility issue."
"We did not have sex thereafter."
"He was kind of a controlling person, (not because he is asexual)."
"He would make me feel ashamed for getting turned on or, god forbid, pleasuring myself."
"He also guilted me in staying with him despite the lack of any sexual compromise."
"He basically said that if I really loved him for him we would stay together."
"And I did love him a lot at the time, so that is why I stayed."
"I know now that sex is important to me, and really it is nice to be intimate with someone and to feel wanted in that way."
"I felt ugly for the longest time because any time I brought up this issue, I would either be rejected, ouch, or shamed for wanting anything sexual."
"We were both pretty young in this relationship."
"If I were in a relationship like this now, after some more relationship experience, I would have tried to have a clearer discussion about my needs."
"In all, I hope that if anyone else finds themselves in this situation, ie with a partner that realizes they’re asexual, that you can have a serious conversation and decide if this is enough of a compatibility issue to stop seeing each other or make a compromise to match both of your needs."- Silverhime
It Can Have Its Advantages
"Wow this is weird, this actually happened to me the other day."
"My partner came and told me she is asexual."
"We talked through what that meant to her and basically she's not anti-sex, in fact she enjoys it, she just has almost no independent interest in sex, and almost no attraction or sexual desire towards people."
"So, after checking that she was still happy with the way things are and she wouldn't prefer some alternative arrangement, we basically just agreed to continue as we have been throughout the relationship up to this point."
"Boring I know, sorry."
"In fact it made me feel more free to pursue my own kinks and desires, since sex is now something she mostly does because she wants to make me happy I feel less bad making it about my wants."- cdwols
Sex is always a very personal issue.
With that in mind, someone with a high sex drive simply might not be able to make a relationship work with an asexual person.
Though opposites do attract, which can include two people with highly opposing views and needs towards sex.
For at the end of the day, there's no ignoring a connection.