Image by Ryan McGuire from Pixabay

So one time a guy told me I had legs like a horse. Yup, that's how we're starting this article.


There's not really a whole lot of context here. I was dancing at a block party, a dude walked up and went:
"Daaaang, you have legs like a horse!"

That's it. He clearly meant it as a compliment but ... what? It's been like a decade and I still lay awake at night wondering about it.

So obviously when Reddit user Smalie asked:

What's the weirdest compliment you ever received?

Let's just say it hit on a topic I'm quite passionate about.

"She Didn't Actually Know What Swans Sound Like"

swan GIF Giphy

"That I have a very swan-like voice. She didn't actually know what swans sound like."

"She was complimenting me on how I said 'your coffee will be ready over there' when we were both working at a coffee shop." - SmartAlec105

"HONK! Coffee's over there. HONK!" - hatelord666

"I was more thinking of their angry hissing." - cabamacadaf

"YES ME TOO. WHEN I WAS A KID THERE WERE THESE SWANS BY THE RIVER THAT PEOPLE HAD FED AND THEYD COME UP TO PEOPLE AND JUST HISS."

"To this day I still get uneasy around swans." - 123thundernugget

Fine Furnishings

Not Bad Season 6 GIF by Parks and Recreation Giphy

"My eyes were brown like a really nice table." - Editor-In-Queef

"That sounds like a compliment I've given someone before and now I feel weird. I told him his eyes weren't just brown, they're cherry. Like really nice cabinets." - showerbeerbuttchug

"I imagine this coming from Ron Swanson." - isthereanyuniquename

Bugging You

scared news anchor GIF by Mashable Giphy

"A random woman outside a café beside a train station, as I get chased by a wasp:"

" 'You smell very sweet and spicy, that's why he's chasing you. It's very nice!' "

"Thank you random lady, 2 years later and I'll never forget." - martini_man_

"I was the only one getting bitten by mosquitoes at a BBQ and a random man said 'I'm not surprised. Your skin looks so soft I'd bite you.' Umm.. please don't?" - scent_of_gardenia

"Although it does sound weird I have to back up her comment. I live in Florida where we have a lot of mosquitos due to humidity, and if me and my fiancé are sitting in the same place he will get bit at least 7 times and I'll get bit 0."

"I always tell him it's because he smells very sweet and the mosquitos like it lol! I'm so attracted to his smell I can only imagine they are too." - BeeRivers

It's A Vibe

kermit worry GIF Giphy

" 'You remind me of Kermit the frog. Not in looks, in vibes.' "

"I mean the muppets are rad but it was said while I was handing somebody food and talking in a completely monotone voice haha" - drummerfromjetwash

"Dude Kermit is one of my heroes I would be thrilled." - dingledangle23

"Honestly not weird. That's a really nice compliment, in my opinion." - CyanCrackers

"Kermie is the everyday hero and I absolutely adore him!" - Fink665

"I wanna vibe with kermit the frog. Wanna be homies?" - dark_and_scary

That Cranium, Tho

caveman smile GIF by Aardman Animations Giphy

"I was admiringly told by a female anthropology professor in class that I have a 'very robust cranium' like an archaic H. sapiens. Not the size of the head, but the prominence of cranial landmarks. Think caveman."

"I do have very robust and hyper-masculinized cranial landmarks. I've just never had it put to me in exactly those terms."

"I told my wife later and she was like 'omg she has the hots for you!' Lol." - PolackTony

"This made me robustly laugh out loud." - cephalopodio

"This is the most anthropological thing I have seen in weeks. Anthro nerds hit different." - salajomo

"That is hard core dirty talk from an anthropologist." - ackoo123ads

They're Real

james mcavoy kilt GIF by Saturday Night Live Giphy

"I went to Mexico with a buddy about 10 years ago and we were drinking with a bunch of people. Well another group of people were standing near us and kept looking over and whispering to each other, staring at us until finally a few of them approached us."

"The one guy looks at me and says 'are your calves real?' I was like 'ughhhhh yeah.. they're real,' he turns to his friends and yells 'they're real!' "

"They all proceed to walk over and talk to us. A group of maybe 10 people complimented me on my calves, it was very weird."

"I play a lot of sports like football, American football, soccer, hockey, baseball, rugby, basketball etc, so that probably helps; but even as a baby I had really big calves." - CdnRageBear

She Likes Your Hair

episode 1 hair GIF by The Bachelorette Giphy

"I had a girl tell me she'd like it if I got hit by a car so that she could cradle my head and stroke my hair as I died." - wishsleepwasoptional

"People like that should come with warning signs and maybe a legal disclaimer." - Traditional-Newt4172

"That sounds less like a compliment and more like a confession." - SylvanWhisper

"Perhaps you should keep your distance from that young lady" - makeupandjustice

Those Beady Little Eyes

GIF by Lovecraft Country Giphy

"An older gentleman I regularly walk by on my way to work and have never exchanged words with randomly said to me one day:"

" 'I don't know whether you want to beat me up or kill me, but you look at me with those beady little eyes and it's scary. But you are a sweetheart I love you, I do' "

"and honestly, as a petite young lady who tries to look intimidating as I walk alone, my day was made." - yellow_birdie

Welp, That Took A Turn

rose GIF Giphy

"I work as a barista at Starbucks. One time this guy came in and ordered a Carmel Frappe. I asked him if that was all for him and he said"

" 'Yes, unless I can get a Trenta of you with my order.' "

"Now I'm very easily flustered so I immediately started blushing and he looked me right in my eyes and said

' "You look beautiful with a blush across your face. It looks like a rose that was flattened by a car.' "

"Now I'm no flirt master, but I don't think that's how you get a girl." - av0cad0-cat

Wat?

Big Brother Reaction GIF by Big Brother After Dark Giphy

"Once heard 'You're not gorgeous, but you'd never know it to look at you.' "

"What?" - tequilamockingbird99

"Wut????" - pottymouthoftheyear

"Negging at its finest. Probably though you were super hot, so he felt he had to knock you down a few pegs." - Clionara

Y'all ... my non-robust cranium hurts now.


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