Weddings are a time of joy and celebration. We're loving LOVE! However, in a heartbeat weddings can turn into a scene out of 'Psycho' or 'Dynasty.' And honey, that can be fun to watch too!
Redditor u/SittingOnTheToilet82 wanted those of us who have witnessed the drama surrounding the uniting of two souls by asking.... What's the worst/best thing you've ever seen happen at a wedding?
Hurt Me. No More.
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The minister was doing their speech during the ceremony and asked, rhetorically, "What is love?"
"Baby don't hurt me" was muttered by several groomsmen, who all started cracking up. PoseidonsHairyNipple
The Giant!
My ex-husband and I were at his cousins wedding. Another cousin of his (25/M) was a groomsman. He was a GIANT guy (6'4, roughly 400 pounds) and the life of the party. Picking kids up and throwing them in the air, holding the Groom on his shoulders, dancing like a maniac. Having a blast.
I went to the bathroom and came back to the reception to the music cut and everyone circled around the dance floor just... panicked. There was Matt. Completely purplish red and on the floor while a guest performed CPR and others were calling 911, taking his pulse, screaming.
He passed away from a massive heart attack. Pronounced dead on the scene.
The reception ended right then and there, obviously. The bride and groom were supposed to leave for their honeymoon to Hawaii that same evening. They ended up not going and instead they stayed home to attend the funeral where the Groom was a pallbearer. YasMysteries
Broke Out.
My buddy married a woman who was estranged from most of her family save her 90+ year old grandpa. They were so close and he was in poor health that the wedding was held in grandpa's backyard so he could be there.
36 hours before the wedding he had a massive heart attack and was rushed to the ER. They were recommending hospice/palliative care and bride to be was going to call off the wedding. Grandpa insisted it go on even with him not being at his own house because people were flying from all over the country. All during intermittent bouts of consciousness.
Fast forward to the wedding and this determined grandad "broke out" of the hospital. just unhooked all his equipment/IV stuff and took a cab to his own house hours before the wedding.
The family that was invited was incredibly upset but knew how close he was to the bride and he ended up staying through the whole ceremony without issue. Slept in his bed and then returned to the hospital the next day. Think he also drank a few beers
Absolute legend of a man. an4x
They Lived.
Watching the groom and his best men ride the bathtub that was used for the beer down a hill and not die. It was a hill for loading boats into a river. It was like a 150 foot ride and they got going scary fast. The bath broke into pieces but all five of the men where fine.... somehow. TheGreatWitchPaige
The Long Pause.
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At my wedding, the maid of honor gave a 15 minute speech that did nothing but reference her breakup, and then me and my wife's prior relationships in gruesome detail. Longest 15 minutes of my life. We're no longer married. HackTheSystem-90
The Dance.
My best friend's biological father, who took off when she was very young, threw a fit and made everyone from his family leave, because my best friend did her father/daughter dance with her step dad, who has raised her in her father's absence. watermelonoma
It Works Out.
When I was a child, my cousin and I cut my our aunt's wedding cake while everyone was out of the room. We thought we were helping. I'd feel bad, she ended up divorcing the dude and her current husband is awesome. AbraxasEolh
Good for the Soul.
I was at a wedding where the family had a tradition that between the wedding and the reception, the couple would take a fifteen minute break to share a large bowl of chicken soup. They ate at a table in the middle of the courtyard and no one was allowed to come near.
Not only does it prevent the starving bride problem, but it emphasizes that they are accountable only to each other. jeffbell
Destroyers!
A guest let their children play in the kitchen a couple hours before the wedding despite repeatedly being told not to let their children in there (among other things, apparently they'd been misbehaving a lot). The kids destroyed the wedding cake. I believe they were related to the bride somehow and that's why they were there so early. Chickenpastalover
I Love an Evil Monkey.
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At my wedding the registrar said the best mans name instead of mine during the I do's and my wife was to busy staring at me to notice. My mate with pure class started to stand up and walk up to take my place! I gave him the evil monkey stare and the whole room was laughing pretty hard. The registrars face was bright red and she apologized for it. LOL Badger_bo
The Sound of the Tings....
When my uncle got married the best man dropped the ring. In the dead silence of the church you could hear it 'ting ting ting' as it bounced along the floor, followed by one of the groomsmen stage whispering "Jesus Christ" loud enough for everyone to hear. The pastor didn't even bat an eye, just said, "The ring has already been blessed, thank you" and carried on. ink_monkey96
We hear You!
I walked by an outdoor wedding in which the bride walked in to "Maneater" and the groom walked in to "Gold Digger." Either the whole family has a great sense of humor or the marriage is doomed. GKrollin
Roll Away.
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Roller Skate wedding. Bride fell down and opened a gusher on her head. They finished the ceremony and took her to the hospital. She ended up needing emergency surgery to drain fluid build up in her head and ended up having to relearn how to walk.
The adverse effects were from the surgery that saved her life, not the accident itself. Sometimes to save someone, you gotta mess some crap up. TheLightningCount1
Interruptions.
They rented a huge manor.... Music? Not a problem: Spotify.... Premium you ask? Nope..... with the commercials. osktox
This couple asked everyone to request a song on their RSVPs and they made a playlist. It was all random songs in random order. A lot of them weren't even good dancing or party songs, just songs people liked. Spotify sounds better. jittery_raccoon
Besties....
There was a couple who had been "best friends" forever- like... many years. They never put the boyfriend/girlfriend label on anything, but they were both in the military, lived together, and were an item long before they introduced each other as girlfriend and boyfriend.
By the time they started "dating" they only really dated for about a year before they got married, even though they'd effectively been together for over a decade. Their families knew each other, everyone who knew them knew they were going to eventually get married- it wasn't weird if you knew them.
During their wedding, they were brought to the dance floor to play some kind of newlywed game while the DJ (who didn't know them) MC'd the event. He asked how long they dated, to which they said just under a year. The DJ goes on this rant about how he can't believe people that only know each other for a short period of time and get married. He ironically asked them if they understood that they were getting MARRIED and that he seriously doubted that they'd known each other for long enough to make that kind of commitment. Yiiiiikes. raddlesnake
Beware the Rando!
My wife was recently a bridesmaid for her friend who she hadn't really seen in a few years. It was actually a nice wedding and the reception was also pretty nice. Unfortunately the groomsman my wife was paired with was under the impression that she was going to go home with him after the wedding. Me and my wife have been together for almost 20 years. And some rando she met one or two times is going to sweep her off her feet when her husband and kid are in the same room? PunchBeard
Tears and Upstaging!
Best: Bride and Groom both happy crying at the alter.
Worst: Another man proposing to his girlfriend during the reception.
Never seen but heard about: Someone else proposing to the bride during the ceremony. Somuchtoomuchporn
What a Zoo....
My cousin had her wedding at a zoo because she was a vet tech and her first date was at a zoo as well as her engagement so it just made sense. I was a bridesmaid so we got to get especially up close to the animals. The giraffes kept trying to eat the bouquets during the pictures (and they were nontoxic so it was mostly just funny and cute). detrimentsLament
BOO!
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I was at my "cousin's" wedding (not actually related but she's my godmother's daughter). Her and her husband hired this performer for their reception. This woman was dressed up like a plant and was in what looked like a large cement planter outside.
My mother and I decided to sit right next to where she was. Every so often she would change position but did so kind of slowly, almost like she was being moved by the wind in slow motion.
Now that in and of itself isn't really that cool. What was great though, was the fact that this woman dressed as a plant was manufacturing fun for herself. She would stay still and wait for people to stop in front of her and start a conversation. When she was sure they hadn't noticed her, she would start moving and scare the crap out of the people that were there. My mother and I got a good hour or so of amusement from that. EsotericTaint
HEEEEEEY Boys!
Gay male wedding in England. Registrar stands at front of the ceremony before starting the vows and for some inexplicable reason says "get your rings ready boys." Cue 30 gays bursting out in uncontrollable laughter, and the older family members at the front looking round confused and/or disapprovingly. Didsburyflaneur
There are many grammatical rules that are broken, like nouns acting as adjectives, or nouns acting like verbs.
To explore this concept and to hear input from strangers online, Redditor Shabbydarstqc asked:
"What 'exception to the rule' do you live by?"
According to these Redditors, telling the truth doesn't always set them free.
Truthfulness
"Being honest. There's times where the truth isn't always for the better."
"You can be honest but you don't have to tell them everything you know."
– Ronin100
Feel The Room
"Actually, when you are saying the truth you should consider why you are saying it. If it's to make someone look bad or yourself look good, you should say nothing at all."
Reeling It In
"Everything in moderation, including moderation."
"Basically, exercise restraint and self-control, but not to an extent that it bars me from new experiences, and with the understanding that it's okay to be a complete, sloppy disaster person sometimes."
Generally speaking, we should all treat everyone with kindness.
But, when we're wronged, do we take it lying down?
Conditional Kindness
"Be nice to everyone, you never know what they are dealing with..."
"Except the b*tch that made a huge scene about my disabled son in a packed store at the checkout."
So What Happened Was...
"My son was 5 at the time. He has Septo-optic dysplasia, schizencephaly, and autism. Basically, he's missing two parts of his brain, had brain surgery for a large mass from the schizencephaly, totally blind in one eye and tunnel vision in the other. (It's honestly a miracle he is as functional as he is)."
"Anyway, we were behind the woman currently checking out. There was coloring books at the end of the check out line. He asked if he could look at them and I said that's fine. So he starting flapping his hands while walking that way because he was excited. The side she was standing on was the side he can't see out of. While flapping, his hand grazed her backside and she went off that he groped her. Yelled and pointed in the store that my 5 year old, that you can physically see is disabled- sexually assaulted her by groping her butt. Thankfully he had no idea the scene was about him because he was looking at the coloring books at that point. Im not one to yell, especially in public but I did. Then went to my car and cried wondering how many people like this he's gonna have to deal with in his life. It sucked."
It's all a matter of preference for these Redditors.
Being In Control
"Everyone in the neighborhood hires a lawn service to mow, weed, and trim their properties."
"I do my own - not because I can't afford it, but because I prefer the results when I do it myself."
Better Food
"100%, same for food."
"$15 at home gets you a family meal and maybe leftovers, tastes good, decently healthy."
"$30 out gets you a family meal that is kind of meh, too salty and probably too greasy."
"Home Ec is a dying art."
Sweet Additive
"All things sugar free - except my coffee."
"Hah I'm the other way around. I love sugar, but keep it away from my coffee."
A Matter Of Taste
"Vegetarian except for lobster corn chowder."
"In my defense, the haters claim there is no actual lobster in the chowder so that's my excuse for eating it. It's been so long since I've had actual lobster that I forgot what it tastes like."
Going Off The Footpath
"Shoes. I just don't wear them unless I'm snowboarding, my boss is gonna show up to work, or I plan on doing a lot of walking around outside in the snow."
"I don't care about the needing to wear shoes signs at places."
As a general fan of cinema, I am open to watching all genres of film.
I'm also a huge fan of horror, and I can take bloody carnage, and everything having to do with the supernatural.
However, there is ONE film I refuse to watch, and that's Human Centipede.
Seriously, why would anyone ever watch it? I don't have to see it to know it is gratuitous and made for shock value only.
I challenge anyone that might argue it has artistic integrity. And if they try to make me watch it to prove a point, I just might allow them the win if only to spare me from puking my guts out.
My family has a history that includes the mafia, the FBI, murder in an asylum, alcohol, drugs... the list is endless. And I'd rather just watch Days of Our Lives.
Family Issues
Stephen Colbert Love GIF by The Late Show With Stephen ColbertGiphy"My mother told me that my dad, wasn't my real dad, drunk one night when I was 16. That was 31 years ago. To this day his side of the family still thinks I'm his."
- Traiz3r
Show me the $$$
"One of my uncles borrowed $20,000 from my other more successful Uncle to start a business and refuses to pay his more successful brother back because he's "got so much money already". The more successful uncle refuses to sue him because that's not what family does, but they are no longer on speaking terms."
- mikenyle
Mum is crazy...
"My great-grandmother helped cover up a murder. Claimed the guy was a psychopath and attacked her daughter and granddaughter for no reason. In actuality, my mum was going through a phase where she would try to get men turned on by rubbing her arse on them. This guy pushed her off and told her to screw off."
"My mum took offence to this and claimed the guy was trying to take her clothes off. My grandmother, who was on all the drugs, came out of her room and stabbed the guy to death to protect her daughter. My mum told the truth after the guy was dead and they came up with a cover up story so that they wouldn't get in trouble."
We were on a BREAK!!!
"My grandpa and grandma broke up for a few weeks in August 1962. In that one week my grandpa got drunk one night and got the woman living across the hall from my grandma pregnant, and my grandma had a fling with a married man while on the late shift as a bartender and got pregnant herself. My grandparents got married and my grandma passed my aunt barb off as my grandpas child."
"The other woman gave my aunt Joyce up for adoption. Both were born exactly a week apart. 30 years later my mom was getting married and visited my Grandmas sister to hand out wedding invitations. My Grandmas sister decided that was the perfect occasion to tell my mother out of nowhere that my Aunt Barb was not my grandpas biological daughter. My mom was shocked and confronted my Grandma after the visit and who denied it."
"My mom then decided stupidly to keep it secret. It was kept a secret from my Aunt Barb for 40 years until my aunt Joyce found my grandpa and looked exactly like him. That is when my aunt Barb had a DNA test done and confirmed she wasn't his daughter. It took my aunt barb 17 years to find her real fathers family and she finally found them last year. They all accepted her into the family."
WTF
Steve Harvey Reaction GIFGiphy"My Dad lives in his car and is only given enough money for basic food and is only allowed in the house to clean it. He's more of a household servant than anything."
- Catctus
Yeah, that is a whole lotta mess. That's why sometimes you just have to change your name, or fake your death. These people are crazy.
Captor
Frustrated Skip Bayless GIFGiphy"I have done extensive genealogical research and found that my maternal family enslaved over 700 human beings."
Dirty Grandpa...
"My grandad had sex with everyone of my grandma's 5 sisters, over about 40 years, 3 he had long term affairs with. It all came out at my grandma's 60th birthday party when everyone had too much to drink. Fun times, trying to get between several old women, trying to prevent them from punching one another."
Most Wanted
"While cleaning out a relative's house after his funeral, we discovered that the family member was virtually on a first name basis with every major law enforcement department (city, state and federal) within a 100 mile radius. Among other things, he had consulted on FBI cases."
"He wore his disdain for all politicians openly. So, imagine our surprise to discover that he'd been invited to almost every Presidential inauguration within the last forty'ish years. I never had any illusions that I ever truly knew this family member. But if I had, they would've gone away after discovering all that stuff."
Boxed In
"My great grandfather would lock my uncle in one of those big metal toolboxes you sometimes see in the back of trucks for hours as a form of punishment when he was a kid. I can't even imagine how hot it must have been being locked up outside in one of those during the summer. He must have been terrified. I see now why my uncle's a drug addict with a crap ton of mental health issues. And that's not even the worst thing my great grandfather did but that's not my story to tell."
Smh GIFLord DNA can be messy. And now I want to know even less of my family's past. I'm going to cancel my Ancestry DNA package. Let's be strangers.
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