Here comes the bride....
[rebelmouse-image 18352338 is_animated_gif=Weddings are truly epicenters of drama. They're high stakes, and they involve the feelings of more than just the bride and groom spinning round and round at a solid 10. And out of the high stakes and the anxiety comes some crazy stories.
u/satori1997 wanted to hear from Reddit's experiences at weddings: What's the craziest thing you've witnessed at a wedding?
Buckle up cause here comes the freakin' bride.
Incongruous
[rebelmouse-image 18361913 is_animated_gif=The bride delivered beautiful, heartfelt serious vows during the ceremony and when it came time for the groom to step up, he made a joke about how he can't wait to see her pregnant and fighting off zombies. It was mortifying and you could see the disappointment on her face.
Health Coordination
[rebelmouse-image 18352395 is_animated_gif=I didn't actually see it, but when we arrived at the reception, after taking photos, there was an ambulance parked outside. My new wife and I were worried that something might have happened to an older relative.
Apparently our wedding coordinator (it was at a golf course) was epileptic, and had had a seizure. As it began, she turned to my father-in-law, said "I need help," and then collapsed.
They called for an ambulance, and while they were wheeling her out, she kept apologizing over and over, and even emailed us about it after. We were just glad she was alright.
Raised By Narcissists
[rebelmouse-image 18361915 is_animated_gif=My parents threw a competing after-wedding brunch to my own---and didn't tell me or my wife. No one from my side came to ours because they assumed that plans had changed. My mother stole them all away with her dirty trick.
I found out about the plot when my aunt kissed me goodbye at the end of my wedding and said she'd see me tomorrow, at the hotel. The actual brunch was at my in-laws house.
When I confronted my parents about it, they said I should thank them for spending the money---and I should have been there.
I think this all happened because my parents are jealous of my in-laws, who are successful, well off, generous, and loving.
Conflicting Ceremonies
[rebelmouse-image 18361916 is_animated_gif=My cousin's wedding about 25 years ago. It was in a Catholic church so the wedding was pretty long by definition.
At the same time as my cousin's wedding, there was a reception going on for another wedding, in the basement of the same church -- complete with DJ'ed music, which was filtering upstairs all throughout "our" service.
Literally, the exact moment that the Priest said "You may kiss the bride", the DJ downstairs started playing "Roll Out the Barrel."
Everybody cracked up -- except the bride's mother, who quit her membership in the church the next day. Extra drama points: the Priest was the bride's uncle.
Thanks, Uncle Lou
[rebelmouse-image 18361917 is_animated_gif=Couple opened their wedding gifts at the reception and we all had to watch like it was a f-cking birthday party for a toddler. There were lots of gift comments that would have been better in private.
"Oh wow, a toilet brush? Uhh...thanks, Uncle Lou..." -eye roll and chuckle-
Awful Display
[rebelmouse-image 18354401 is_animated_gif=My aunt decided to break her 23 year no drinking streak and have two glasses of red wine. Approaches my cousin and his wife (she did NOT like this girl), and informs them that their son looks nothing like my cousin and she just knows she slept with another man. While the room was quiet.
The Worst News
[rebelmouse-image 18354016 is_animated_gif=Family of the bride got a notification during the ceremony that the child of a relative who couldn't attend was hit by a car and killed earlier in the day.
Tears of joy instantly turned to tears of grief. Everyone on the bride's side was just sobbing and everything, and the wedding was called off right then and there.
The bride and groom still haven't gotten married yet, almost 9 months later (they are still together, though), because the bride was really close to this child and was already upset that he and his mom couldn't come.
Classless
[rebelmouse-image 18361918 is_animated_gif=The wedding was at a soup kitchen the couple sometimes volunteered at, presumably to remind us how selfless they are. Hundreds of homeless people were gathered outside and if the couple had said "hey, dress casual because if you're coming to our wedding you'll be helping serve the homeless" I would have been all for it - instead we stood there in nice clothes eating food while all the homeless people watched through the fence. Extremely awkward, totally classless. The homeless were essentially used as props. Also I had not really understood where this was or expected to run the homeless gauntlet to get in so I didn't prepare my kids who were traumatized and kept asking if we were going to lose our house. On the plus side, we got to attend a wedding in a dirty parking lot.
Slight Panic
[rebelmouse-image 18356969 is_animated_gif=Stood up in a wedding recently where all the guys were standing at the altar and the bridesmaids came up the aisle to music...the whole thing was going smoothly. Then the doors shut and everyone turned to wait for them to open for the bride to walk in.
Except we waited, and waited. The usher (brother of the bride) poked his head out, left, came back and motioned for his mother to come back immediately.
She left, we waited more, usher called for one of the groomsmen (other brother) to come back there. He left, we waited.
Turns out the father of the bride had a massive kidney stone that must have started passing right when he was supposed to walk his daughter down the aisle.
The bride was a mess, the father was screaming in agony, the organ just kept playing music softly. Eventually we found out what was happening so everyone kind of relaxed that it wasn't the bride running away.
Jealousy
[rebelmouse-image 18361919 is_animated_gif=Mother of the groom showed up in a white formal gown complete with a mini veil on a fascinator, sobbed loudly throughout the ceremony, and then tried to cut in every time the bride and groom danced.
Sssssslight Misssssscommunication
[rebelmouse-image 18361920 is_animated_gif=Two California Kingsnakes slithered through the venue at my wedding. That was not planned.
Ignore The Children
[rebelmouse-image 18361921 is_animated_gif=I saw a fight between two of the bride's uncles where one of them picked the other up and slammed him through a glass table in the lobby. Police and ambulance were called. The bride came walking out of the main room and I grabbed her, told her to go back in and ignore everything, and she was just like, "Ok, not gonna let whatever happened ruin my night." Wedding continued like nothing happened.
Cake Cake Cake Cake
[rebelmouse-image 18361922 is_animated_gif=Only horrible for one person. The main hostess for the reception of about 30 guests. She carried in the 3-tier wedding cake, rather than using a cart. She not only dropped it, but fell face first into it on the floor. First dead silence...then a few giggles....and then her emotional breakdown like I have never seen before. She was completely devastated from both the embarrassment and ruining that special moment. We all eventually assured her that we're half drunk and don't care about the cake. The best part was that she easily collected $1000 more in tips than she would have had that not happened.
Wedding Bell Rumble
[rebelmouse-image 18358651 is_animated_gif=One wedding I was at a few years ago was pretty big (maybe around 100-200 people) and it erupted into a gigantic brawl. Like at least half the people there were involved.
I don't know how it started, aside from a bunch of people being way too drunk, but it started outside where people were smoking. I was sitting at my table having a drink and noticed that the dance floor like fully cleared out. I walked over to the bar and noticed a bunch of people fighting right at the entrance. Eventually it spread inside to the front entry way and near the bar. I sat at the bar watching it all unfold and had a drink.
An older guy got pushed through a window and had a huge gash on his head, the groom got a tooth knocked out, a lot of people had blood stained shirts and like 10 cop cars and a few ambulances showed up. I don't know if anyone got arrested because I didn't stick around too long after. The bride just went to the bathroom and changed into normal clothes, seemed pretty distraught. I think they're still married..
Buffet Burns
[rebelmouse-image 18361924 is_animated_gif=I was a wedding DJ back in the day, so I've seen 'em all; but my all time favorite was at a VFW Hall in Wisconsin. The buffet was set up in the center of the dance floor, opposite the head table, with guests seated on either side and my set-up at the far end of the dance floor directly across from the head table. (Buffet was between us)
The caterers put sterno cans directly onto the paper table cloths covering the buffet...and the whole thing went up in flames about 10 minutes after their were lit. The Hall manager comes rushing out with a fire extinguisher, glances in one direction towards my thousands of dollars in equipment and in the other direction towards the head table...and proceeds to blast the buffet-flames, pointing the extinguisher right at the head table. Every dress, tux and hairstyle was ruined...to say nothing of all the food.
I Guess The Vows Were Good
[rebelmouse-image 18361925 is_animated_gif=The translator got too moved by the vows and broke down in tears.
The couple were Irish and Lithuanian, and the ceremony was conducted in Lithuanian, by a Lithuanian officiant, a translator had been provided to allow the English speaking guests to follow proceedings, but she was so overwhelmed by the occasion, she broke down in floods of joyful weeping.
We assumed she was a family member of the bride helping out, but apparently she was an official Lithuanian government translator with no prior connection to anyone or the occasion...
New Pairings
[rebelmouse-image 18361926 is_animated_gif=At a wedding reception one guy left his wife, and one lady left her boyfriend and the two of them left the reception together.
En Garde
[rebelmouse-image 18361927 is_animated_gif=A friend of mine was a marine, so at his wedding he had invited a bunch of his old marine buddies. It was open bar, so everyone was drinking pretty heavily. The thing is, most of the marines showed up with their swords.
There was sword-fighting on the dance floor. It was amazing.
Yikes
[rebelmouse-image 18361928 is_animated_gif=An ex of the groom showed up, took over the mic and said, 'Here's to your small ** and a lifetime of disappointing sex.'
Making Things Awkward
[rebelmouse-image 18361929 is_animated_gif=One of the bridesmaids was close friends with the groom. For the entire wedding, she was making comments on how he was getting his first wedding out of the way and that she would be his second wife.
She was also married, to the best man.
Other highlights include dragging the photographer away to give her a personal photoshoot (photos of her and the groom, and a handful of just her posing) and before the grand entrance for the reception, sitting on the groom's lap and feeding him strawberries.
Both couples are still separately married.
Things People Didn't Realize Were Expensive Until They Became An Adult
Reddit user ForeignReviews asked: 'What item did you not realize was expensive until you became an adult?'
I was very fortunate that my parents were able to pay all expensive not only through adolescence but even through college. However, they made it very clear that once I graduated, I was on my own.
I made every effort to make sure I could afford to live once I graduated. I made copies of all the recipes my parents got when they bought stuff for me, and started saving my own receipts, something I didn't do through high school. I calculated monthly expenses and created a budget for the future.
When I graduated, I had accounted for all the big expenses: take-out food, the expensive skin care essentials I needed to keep my acne at bay, and utilities (heat, AC, electricity).
What I didn't realize was that small expenses are not so small. Microwavable meals went up by $2. Gas, which was pretty steady while I was in college, seemed to shoot up daily. And things that don't seem expensive at first glance, such as toilet paper, become big expenses as they add up.
I'm not the only one who had these realizations. Redditors have too, and are eager to share what items they didn't realize were expensive until they became an adult.
It all started when Redditor ForeignReviews asked:
"What item did you not realize was expensive until you became an adult?"
Yummy, Yummy
"Food is both more expensive and goes bad quicker when you're an adult."
– BriSnyScienceGuy
"I know right! I honestly love grocery shopping, so when I started driving I would go grocery shopping when I had the car and so nowadays I do maybe half of the grocery shopping. But, it's just so expensive. I often look for deals and will buy generic/store brand on most items but, still."
"My biggest tip for "goes bad quicker" is to always get from the back, because usually that's where the longer lasting stuff goes and when it's stacked, get from the bottom. When it's stuff with longer shelf life like cereal and canned stuff, I don't usually bother. But I mostly do that with bread and dairy products. My mom taught me that when I was little."
– ariana61104
"Yes! Having to feed yourself and your household is getting too expensive and so tedious. I really admire my mom for making dinner every night when I was growing up. Thankfully I don't have kids so me & my husband are okay with just eating snacks sometimes."
– WildMoonWitch
So Sweet
"My parents split up when I was a kid in the 90s, and I remember going to my dads apartment in another city, and him cooking us steak on the grill. I always loved that."
"Once I moved out I was like "wait steak is how much? Why the hell did Dad keep feeding us this?""
"Then I realised he was eating poverty meals all week to treat his kids on the weekend."
"For his 60th birthday us kids pooled our money and took him to arguably the best fine dining restaurant in my province for the full tasting menu. Seeing him light up at trying things like caviar and truffles for the first time made me realize how much he has sacrificed for us."
"So yeah, steak is expensive."
– KFBass
"You guys are awesome; what a nice story. He raised y'all right."
– Augustus58
Where Do I Sit?
"Gotta be furniture."
– harrisrichard
"When I bought my house I only had a bed in the master bedroom and all my friends kept saying “you make good money just buy furniture, you could have it furnished in a month.” Then they themselves bought houses and now understand why it took me a year to furnish my house."
– Stetikhasnotalent
They Don't Need To Be That Nice!
"Rugs. Why did no one tel me a ‘nice’ rug was $18,000."
– BenSadfleck
"But it really ties the room together."
– alittlec4
"Dude, you could fly to Morocco and get a hand made wool rug for that much. What the heck are you buying?"
– mofukkinbreadcrumbz
"My dog isn’t going to want to butt scoot on anything cheaper than 10k."
– iamaliberalpausenot
Car Accessories
"New tires. Most unexciting $1,000 purchases I have ever made."
– PRCraig
"Also why the hell are oil changes so expensive now!?"
– johnstonb
"Bro fr I swear they were just $20 just a second ago now it’s like $60?? I asked my dad to teach me how to do it myself as a teen and he said it was so cheap that I might as well pay someone else. That didn’t last."
– greeneggiwegs
Walk It Off
"A good pair of shoes will set you back a bit, especially if you need more specialized ones for whatever reason."
– sedition-
Part Of The Family
"Pets."
– TeacherLady3
"They have gotten a lot more expensive due to expected care changing dramatically, and how we feel about them."
"The idea that you would put a pet down because a vet treatment costs too much is horrible now, but was pretty common in the past. Outdoor cats were the norm so they pretty much fed themselves and you had far fewer litter changes - litter was just clay, and you tossed the whole thing."
"Dogs ate table scraps and whatever they hunted down, or cheap as dog feed made of whatever ended up on the slaughter house floor (bones and all)."
"While purebreds were probably still super expensive, most people had a mutt or tabby, that the found/were given, instead of buying."
– RandomChance
"All true. But I waited until I was in my 50's and had raised my kids until I could afford a pet. Like kids, I wasn't going to be a pet owner until I could provide the care they deserve."
– TeacherLady3
The Cost Of People
"Kids."
"I'm amazed how my parents could afford me."
– only_stupid_answers
"My parents had 5 of us. It amazes me to this day, that my fathers paultry salary at the time had to support it all. How the f**k could anyone do that today?"
– The_REAL_McWeasel
Vroom, Vroom
"Cars, all grown-ups had them, maybe even multiple. I still think its insane that some cars are more expensive than a 2 bedroom apartment."
– Tommer_nl
"I remember people restoring cars all the time when I was growing up. I would love to do it but even a rough condition rolling rust is super expensive now for even common things people aren’t super after."
– Pup5432
"Yeah what the hell!? I feel like everyone's dad (mine included) had a project car that they were tinkering with."
"All of my 'tinkering' is to keep my single, daily driver running!"
– disisathrowaway
Shiny Teeth And Me
"My teeth."
– Bumfuzzled_Hobgoblin
"Teeth are luxury bones, don’t ya know? Why on earth would regular health insurance cover them? Hahaha. The fact that vision and dental are separate from the rest of your body is absurd."
– Blackfoxx907
I See You!
"Glasses. I have awful eyesight and an astigmatism and got quite a shock when I had to pay for my own prescription glasses for the first time."
– Heavy_Mycologist_104
Time Flies
"Free time."
"As a kid I had loads of it and gave it away. now I can't afford even a minute !!"
– TokenFeed
"I took a toll road home today for an extra hour of free time and it was the best money I ever spent."
– squidkiosk
What I wouldn't give -- or pay -- for some extra free time!
People Share The Dirty Secrets That Made Them Stop Supporting A Company
In the 1987 movie Wall Street, actor Michael Douglas' antihero Gordon Gekko infamously said:
"Greed, for lack of a better word, is good."
The quote became a perfect representation of rampant corporate greed and corruption prevalent in the era during and after Republican President Ronald Reagan's stint in the Oval Office. The Reagan administration pushed deregulation and elimination of consumer protections.
While the government may not always step in to thwart shady or harmful businesses, consumers have one way to control them—their money.
Money talks.
Reddit user Wetter42 asked:
"What's a dirty little secret you found out about a company or service that made you stop using them?"
Poor Working Conditions
"Ashley Furniture—abysmal OSHA record, repeat and willful violations."
"People are not expendable."
~ surfinwifsharks
"I assure you, it's worse."
"That's just what OSHA made public, but I live near their factory in Arcadia and know people who work there, or used to work there."
"Someone bled for your dresser."
~ Wild_Question_9272
"I used to work as the lead designer for BLUENOTES in Canada. YM Inc knowingly uses near slave and child labour and denies everything in the press, but they do know, and they don't care."
"Money is more important."
~ Pkactus
"I used to work for Goodwill and in the back I saw one of my coworkers who has a physical and mental handicap come out of the office of our store manager crying. I really liked this coworker, I remember her as one of the nicest people I've ever known."
"I asked her what was wrong and she said that her wages were going to be cut substantially. She stated the store manager was told by corporate that it was since she was not able to work as fast as others in the back doing pricing.
"I asked if she would mind if I asked what they had cut it to and she said $3.30 an hour."
"WTF!"
"It turns out that Goodwill has a policy to pay disabled workers the legal subminimum wage."
"Sec 14 (c) allows corporations to pay people with disabilities a subminimum wage. According to Labor Department records, Goodwill pays some of its disabled workers as low as $0.22, $0.38 and $0.41 per hour depending on the state laws."
"Goodwill does not show much goodwill towards their workers."
~ Red_Beard_of_Tucson
Questionable Spending
"Susan G. Komen for the Cure."
"The pink ribbon is a scam!"
~ worldsokayestmomx3
"Most people also don't realize it just because something is pink, has a ribbon on it, says breast cancer on the front or is sold in October it doesn't necessarily benefit anything other than the company that made it!"
"There are no patents or trademarks on pink ribbons that mean that anytime it's used it has to benefit breast cancer research or awareness. Literally anybody can sell something pink with a ribbon and it doesn't mean a damn thing for actual cancer patients."
~ Crystal_crone
Shady Business Practices
"H&R Block used to do something like this with their tax preparation service. Not sure if they still do."
"Their slogan was something like, 'Come on in and we'll tell you if there's mistakes in your self-prepared return, for free!'."
"So you go in, they spend 5 minutes looking at your self-prepared return, and they tell you, 'Yes, indeed, there are mistakes here'."
"And then you ask them to tell you what the mistakes are. And that's when they tell you it'll cost $75 for them to tell you."
~ whomp1970
"Intuit lobbied the government to keep taxes complex."
"F*ck TurboTax."
~ lifesavingsgoboom
"Angie’s List (aka Angi). Did work for a person and they left a good review on Angie’s List.
"Next thing I know I’ve got a guy from their call center blowing up my phone. He wanted me to pay them to put more good reviews under my company’s name and to steer potential customers towards my business for an additional fee."
"Basically everything they say they don’t do on their ads. I’m sure it was a trustworthy company when Angie still owned it, but it’s scammy as hell now."
~ Tangboy50000
"My mother is terminally ill and closing her business. Angie’s List called about promotion and she kept saying no."
"Finally had to tell them she was dying."
"They offered her a cheaper promotion. They suck."
~ StitchingKitty897
"The sheer amount of people who still use uTorrent, even among my friends boggles my mind."
"It's basically an adware at this point. They even used to bundle a cryptominer at one point that secretly used your computer to mine bitcoin (or some other crypto)."
"ALWAYS use open-source Torrent clients."
~ vpsj
"There is a vintage toy store chain near me called the Toy Vault. The owner, Dan, has been ripping people off for years, offering them very little money for their toy collections."
"He treats his employees terribly. Many toy collectors in the area have their own Dan story."
"One time a couple of years ago I was setting up a pop-up shop to sell a massive collection of toys that my friend's parents had hoarded."
"We had been advertising for a couple weeks and were excited to make some people happy offering great deals on a lot of cool toys."
"The Thursday prior to opening Dan messaged me asking if there was a price we'd sell the whole collection for, saying that he could bring a truck that night and rid us of the burden."
"I said no because neither of us had the time and told him he could come Saturday with the rest of the buyers."
"He replied angrily calling me an 'amature' and said that if we were 'serious about selling' we would make the time, and that he knows we shop at his stores."
"Well I don't anymore, Dan."
~ ancient_scully
"There used to be a comics and collectibles store near me that was run by the same type of people. They would take the current month's comics and bag them and mark them up by at least 50%, so you would have to pay a premium for even the most recent issues."
"If they thought the comics were going to be hot, the marked them up even more). They were pretty much the only comics store in the area, and they were one of the few that sold a lot of independent comics, so it sucked that I had to boycott them."
"What's worse was their policy towards collectibles and action figures—the owner would buy case upon case of whatever the latest fad toy was and pull out the rarest figures and charge $100+ for them."
"Then he would drive his pre-teen son to the local Toys R Us with the rest of the figures, and have the kid walk in and claim that he had gotten all of them for his birthday, but he didn't want them, so could he trade them in for store credit.
"At the time, Toys R Us had a pretty loose policy towards returns—if you brought in something still sealed in its original box and it was an item they sold, you could get store credit for it. This worked for a while, but eventually this guy was banned from every Toys R Us within like an hour's drive."
"Eventually, the comics and action figures craze died down and this guy went out of business shortly thereafter."
~ WaldoJeffers65
"Companies like BetterHelp (mental health platform) exploit clients data/info and breached privacy."
"Yet they still advertise everywhere. Somewhere like 3 lawsuits about it."
~ Friendly-Jump-5307
"Therapist here. BretterHelp is total garbage."
"I feel bad for the clients who go through several green therapists to find someone who's actually a good fit and then the therapist leaves (understandably) because BetterHelp treats and pays them so poorly."
~ SpuddyBud
"The Weather Channel app collected and sold user location data without disclosing it would it be shared with advertisers."
~ KawIsTheLaw
"I will never buy anything from LG."
"Sometime around 2008ish, they (like many other hardware/software companies) were messing around with what was essentially adware, seeing how far they could push things to get borderline-malicious advertising onto your home computer."
"Stuff like the pile of CDs that came with your new Gateway, the 'do you also want to install X, Y and Z? We're going to imply it's necessary' when installing messaging apps, or the huge unnecessary printer 'software suite' when all you needed was the driver."
"LG went a step further."
"LG embedded adware in the firmware of their CD/DVD drives."
"Every time you opened or closed the drive, you'd get a little popup from your system tray that served you an ad—pretty much indistinguishable from the legions of adware/spyware your aunt would get from clicking 'yes' to all her popup ads."
"Except nobody clicked yes on anything, and it couldn't be removed. It was embedded in the drive itself, essentially performing an AutoPlay exploit on a virtual drive to show you the ads, then disappear again."
"They eventually were threatened with legal action and had to post a firmware update/removal tool on their website.
"The ad software was called BlueBirds, and LG scrubs all mentions of it from their Wikipedia article every now and then."
~ DJ33
Cruelty And Greed
"Nissan spent a decade ruining the life of the guy who owned nissan.com."
~ zonker77
"Crumbl Cookies. Their VP of HR did an AMA (Ask Me Anything) on LinkedIn that I happened to see because they are fairly local and I have a few mutual connections."
"Anyway, she went off on why they were always understaffed in an area because 'everyone one else is paying above market value for employees and [we] only want to pay market value and hire people passionate about [our] brand and making cookies'."
"It really rubbed me the wrong way, because if everyone else is paying more than you it doesn’t mean they are paying above market value, it means you are paying below market value."
"I haven’t been back since, besides they also sued another company for also selling cookies in square boxes… and honestly the other companies cookies taste better."
~ Luckyfinger7
While we as consumers and customers can't directly dictate anyone else's morals or ethics, we can choose who we will and won't give our money to.
Use your buying power wisely.
When we hear the term "class clown," we inevitably can think of a specific person who filled that role when we were growing up.
And in some cases, we can recall a time when they took their role much too far.
Curious about jokes gone wrong, Redditor Sharp_Emu6639 asked:
"When did the class clown go too far?"
Cancer Isn't Funny
"Kept making ‘Yo Mama’ jokes to my friend who’d just lost his Mom to cancer. My friend snapped and broke his nose."
- darksaber522
The Speed of a Fire
"When I was in High School, we had a Firefighter Explorer program where we could go and do shadow work at a few of the local departments."
"One all-volunteer department let some of us Juniors and Seniors respond to specific calls to do minor light work (hold stop signs, carry the ladders, fetch tools, etc.) and allowed us to have a code to their cipher lock. They gave the code to the four local kids so we could get there, unlock the doors, and open the bays and get trucks started and ready to roll."
"One night, the class id**t decided to go into their fire department and play 'pranks' on them. Took all their hoses off the trucks, strung them around the bays and looped them through the axles, discharged all the foam out of the main engine, and screwed with everyone’s bunker gear by swapping boots and removing the liners of structural gear among other things."
"Naturally, it ended very badly when a call came in for a structure fire and when the actual firefighters showed up the entire house was in such disarray that no truck could even leave."
"They ended up calling a town 20 minutes away to respond."
"Two people passed away in the fire. Naturally, all four of us were the top suspects, and it didn’t take the police long to figure it out as the place was full of surveillance cameras. He was arrested, his parents got the bill for all the damages, and we never saw him or his family again after that. They just skipped the area and vanished overnight."
"The fire department killed almost all ties with the Explorer Program and stopped allowing us to respond to minor calls. I went on to get certified as a firefighter and spent five awesome years with them where I still seasonally volunteer (during wildfire season) with them."
- JimSpieks
A Ruined Presentation
"We had a student teacher for like six months when I was in sixth grade, and towards the end of her time with us, she had to record herself teaching a lesson to the class and then provide the video to her school (as a final exam or something)."
"We had this class clown who had to sit in the back, which happened to be near the camcorder. During the recording, he kept saying things like, 's**t, pen*s, f**k,' quiet enough for no one in class to hear but loud enough to be obvious on the recording."
"The student-teacher ended up having to redo the entire video and we had to sit through the exact same lesson a week later without the class clown present."
- sloppyjoesandwich
Deflected Trouble
"Art class. Teacher leaves. Class clown says, 'Dare me to eat this paint!?'"
"My buddy and I ignored him. He got real pushy about eating paint."
"We told him to do whatever the h**l he wanted. He stood on a chair and ate two bottles of paint before the teacher walked back in."
"He got marched to the nurse. We breathed a sigh of relief that he was gone."
"Later that day, my buddy and I got called to the principal's office. We were informed he was at the hospital getting his stomach pumped and it was OUR fault."
"I had never been in trouble before. I spent one hour in isolated detention to see if I 'wanted to share more,' literally just locked in a tiny a** room."
"I got a really long lecture about if I told someone to jump off a bridge and they did it, it would be my fault. I denied any fault again. Then I got put back in isolation until the end of the day."
"My parents went nuclear when I got home and told them what happened."
"The clown showed up the next day just grinning and laughing because he heard we got in trouble."
- Remz_Gaming
Boy Cries Wolf... Or Eats Candy
"Slightly off-topic, but our class clown choked on candy. We thought it was another one of his jokes."
"The whole class laughed at him, even the teacher. Then his face started to go red, his eyes got bloodshot, and he started slamming the table violently."
"Luckily somebody gave him the Heimlich maneuver and saved his life."
"Dude nearly died while everyone sat laughing at him."
- seneca_7
Enough Said.
"A classmate thought it would be funny to light somebody's mullet on fire in the middle of class."
- DrDWilder
A Graduating Vandal
"He came back to the school after hours and put caulking in the locks, and spray-painted pot leaves everywhere."
"Of course, he didn’t know there were cameras so it didn’t take long for him to be caught."
"This was right before graduation too so needless to say, he didn’t walk at graduation and his parents had a hefty damage bill to pay."
- Ozziwulf
Senior Prank Week Gone Wrong
"In my school district, it was tradition for the exiting seniors to pull a prank. One year, a few of the class clowns decided it would be funny to cover all the tile floors with cooking oil, cover the handrails of stairs with Crisco, and put large puddles of oil at the top of each stairwell."
"A girl already on crutches broke her jaw. We had to be evacuated to the bleaches outside. It was super not cool."
- QueasyAd7509
A Ruined Graduation
"Public school, small town. The graduating class only had 54 students in it."
"The kid smeared his s**t all over the bathroom. Walls, floor, sinks, everywhere. The principal had no way of knowing who it was, so the solution... they took the bathroom doors off the hinges."
- PhatWhiteCheeks
No Future in Serving Drinks
"He spilled formic acid on another kid who ended up with some light scarring on his chest."
"To be honest, it was a terrible call from the teacher to get him to carry it around for people to smell."
- CoolioMcCool
Substitute Teaching is Already Hard Enough
"They put staples in the substitute teacher's coffee... I went to school with some real monsters."
- This-Ad-1886
A Traumatized Teacher
"In seventh grade at a public school, our class was on the second floor."
"The class clown stood up in the middle of class, said 'I can't take it anymore,' and ran to the back of the classroom, opened the window, and jumped."
"The teacher screamed, and we all laughed. There was an addition to the building and the roof was under the window where the class clown was standing with a big grin."
"The teacher quit shortly after due to this and several other incidents in her class."
- OMOAB
Targeting the Substitute Teacher
"Sophomore year biology class, we had a substitute teacher during fetal pig dissection week."
"She had stepped out of the classroom for some reason while we were working on the dissection."
"The class clown took out his shoelaces, wrapped one end around the piglet, and rigged the other end to the door so that when the door was opened, his piglet would raise to eye level."
"He scared the teacher when she came back in and he was suspended for a few days."
- Ambitious_Misgivings
Caught Butter-Handed
"We had this kid who would take the small butter packets from the cafeteria and bring them to fifth-period history class. At some point, he would scoop out a glob with his pen and flick the dairy bullet on our history teacher's a** when he walked by."
"He did this probably five or six times without getting caught."
"One day, he f**ked up and scraped the teacher's butt with his pen."
"The teacher checked his pants and found the butter smear."
"The kid's eyes got super wide like a true deer in headlights. He had no excuse for why he did this prank. He just kept apologizing like it was an accident."
"Lol (laughing out loud). Who accidentally flicks butter on an old man's a**?? I'm pretty sure he never graduated. Not surprisingly."
- CannabisaurusRex401
Fun for the Students, At Least
"He stole the English teacher's substitute plans and rewrote them, giving us all a free period instead."
"Terrance, wherever you are, you're a f**king legend."
- jeconti
We can all agree that these pranks, jokes, and even assaults went much too far, whether the class clown was of minor age or not.
Sometimes a prank can be funny, when when it scares someone, severely scares them, or even injures them, it's obviously much too far. A joke is only funny if everyone involved is genuinely laughing.
People Reveal What Their Significant Other Did That Made Them Think 'F**k This, We're Done'
After all, the honeymoon phase is not forever.
Eventually, reality sets in for those who want to be in it for the long haul as the lovebirds gradually start discovering weird idiosyncrasies that can either be perceived as cute quirks or aggravating annoyances.
Is it worth it?
That depends.
Curious to hear of make-it-or-break-it moments in relationships, Redditor The_King_Of_Spades_ asked:
"What is something that an S/O has done that made you go, 'F'k this, we're done'?"
These exes had no regard for the lives of others, some literally.
Serpent Murderer
"She unplugged the heater on my red tail boa's tank. Since the tank was in the spare room I only checked it every couple days. It was winter and I had just fed it so I would always leave it alone for a few days after so it wouldn't stress and have issues digesting. She went in right behind me an unplugged it after arguing with me for weeks to rehome it, which I refused to do."
"I went to check on it a few days later and noticed it froze to death. I asked her if she knew anything about it and her response was 'oh bummer, now I guess you can throw all that sh*t out.'"
"The next day when she was at work I packed all her sh*t and threw it all over her sister's front yard, since her sister was always the one telling her to just do things if I don't give her her way and had told me numerous times to get rid of my snake or else."
"RIP Doobie. I'm sorry buddy."
– burkechrs1
Funeral Brawl
"She started a fight with someone at my gran's funeral."
– LapOfHonour
"That's odd. Nobody is looking at ME for some reason..."
– VAShumpmaker
"Ummm...ex-CUSE me! I'M the ALIVE one here!"
– PicaDiet
Family Comes First
"Gave me sh*t for skipping a minor league ballgame with her family so I could go visit my grandfather in the hospital."
"It was the last time i saw him alive."
"Edit - ok i get it, the last sentence is confusing. I’m referring to gramps."
– chickentimesfive
You never know about a person's true colors.
Dodging A Bullet
"Physically barricaded me in the bedroom and forced me to change into the exact outfit he wanted me to wear before we could go out to meet his friends. I put it on just so he would let me leave and then ran a couple blocks away while he was locking up and called an Uber to my friend's house."
– Particular-Natural12
The Freeloader
"My ex drove my truck and returned it with a drop of gas in the tank. Then she took my bank card from my wallet and filled up her SUV and went to work. I started my truck and got to the gas station, opened my wallet and my card was missing. This was back when I was kind of poor and didn't have any credit cards, just a debit card. I had no cash in my wallet, so no gas. I tried to make it back home but I ran out of gas. I called her asking for help, she refused."
"My buddy picked me up on the side of the road. I went home and packed up my stuff and immediately moved out. I stayed on my friends sofa for a couple weeks while I worked out new living arrangements."
– macmac360
The kids will always be priority number one.
Scared Child
"My 12 year old son was struggling emotionally and it was causing issues with his grades. Boyfriend told him he could go live with his dad if he was going to be a loser. My son called me scared because he thought he was going to have to move to his dad’s. I was out of town at the time. I broke up with him the moment I got back and my son and I moved out."
"F'k you Chris."
– Fickle_Freckle
You Don't Go After The Children
"Called my daughter (not hers) a 'f'king b*tch that ruined our relationship'. Hard no from me."
– javawong
"Thank you for prioritizing your daughter. So many single parents don’t."
– CowboyLaw
Those who abuse animals are not relationship material.
The Last Straw
"Kicked my (our) cat."
"He pushed and pushed to get a cat. I wanted one but didn't really want to spend the next 10 years cleaning litter boxes every day. I eventually gave in because he was so persistent."
"After a few months, he came home from work in a mood one day and the cat got under his feet - as cats tend to do. He kicked her and screamed at her, and she ran and hid under the bed for hours."
"Things had been pretty sh*t between us anyway, but this was the last straw. I told him that if he can't watch where he's f'king going, he shouldn't live with a cat. He responded with something along the lines of 'well f'king get rid of her then!', and I told him I'd rather get rid of him."
"I told him to pack a bag and find somewhere else to stay. He went to stay with his mum, and I only saw him once after that day when he had to sign some paperwork to confirm that he'd moved out of our flat."
"P.S. Still got the cat. She's perfect and I love her so much. She still trips me up almost every day."
"Edit: I do feel like I should clarify (even though ex doesn't deserve it) - he didn't like, kick the cat across the room or something, but he did kick her a lot more aggressively than just tapping her out of the way with his foot. She wasn't hurt at all, but was scared. Had it been any worse, I probably would have flipped out on him even more."
– aerialpoler
Always listen to your gut when it comes to being in a bad situation.
Vulnerable individuals who are deep in love have the tendency of ignoring warning signs and realize until too late that they are with someone they never should've been with in the first place.
That's the tricky thing about pursuing love.
You don't really know a person until you spend more time with them, which is all the more reason to not rush into things.