First dates can be incredibly uncomfortable - but usually when people say that they mean uncomfortable for the daters. Trust us, though, some of those first dates can be just as uncomfortable for the people forced to witness them.
Reddit user StickyRice4 asked:
Considering your classic first date setup typically happens at a bar or restaurant, there were a lot of answers, each a little bit more awful than the one before. Generally speaking, they all boil down to one major mistake - an inability or unwillingness to read your date.
So there you go, folks. That's our pro-tip for the day. Read your date so you know whether or not you should bust out your Pokemon, your racism or homophobia, your fetishes, or that thing you do with your tongue.
Spoiler Alert: Yeeeeaaaaah you should probably keep that stuff to yourself on a first date.
This isn't as bad as some of the others but the guy and girl arrived separately and it seemed like they were meeting for the first time at the restaurant. They sat down then the girl excused herself and went to the bathroom. The guy ordered drinks for them both while she was gone then, after like 30 mins, ordered two meals. It was so obvious she wasn't coming back but he kept calling her and eventually just left all the food and drink untouched and paid the bill.
Bartended for a decade. For a while I was at a medium range Italian restaurant. More than once I saw a first date go awry because one of the two drank too much. Most memorable was a woman who started downing rum punches. They were at a table so I couldn't see them and I guess the waiter had forgotten his "red light, yellow light" training (I don't know if they still do that). After the sixth one I asked if these were all going to the same person and he said yes. I was like, oh sh!t. Sure enough, girl ended up puking all over my bathroom and locking herself in. When we got the door open she was passed out and there was puke everywhere including all over her. No cab would touch her so the guy ended up taking her home. He came in a week later and said they were going on another date. I was skeptical. They've been married for about 15 years and are absurdly happy. She avoids rum punches.
Starbucks And Japanese
She was Japanese and he started off by showing her his shirt with sumo wrestlers on it, then would ask questions like... what's your favorite sushi? Do you only speak Japanese? How do you say toilet in Japanese? They have sumo in Japan right? Did you see my shirt? It was so amazingly awkward
I once had two very young (like 15 at most) teenage boys come into my place for what was clearly their first date together, if not their first date ever. Maybe 20 minutes into their date one of their mothers showed up, realized it was a boy her son was on a date with, and started screaming and crying about she didn't understand how he could do this to her and didn't he know she wanted grandchildren, etc, etc. She just flipped out and was totally homophobic and told him he wasn't allowed in her home if he was going to choose this lifestyle. He started crying, his poor date was totally bewildered, and ended up calling his mom to come take them home.
Girl and guy came into the barbecue restaurant I worked at. At this place, like many casual BBQ places, you pay after you order and then come back to pick up your food when your number is called. That will matter in a second. Anyway...
They met at the door exchanging the usual "Hi, nice to meet you!", etc. The guy was a complete ass. She ordered ribs and without hesitation he said:
"Do you want to keep that hot figure of yours or look like that chick over there?"
He then pointed to a woman who was slightly overweight. While they were waiting in line to pay he started flirting with the chick behind them. She dead ass waited until he paid then left without waiting for the food.
Couple in their mid-twenties comes in, it's obviously a first date but they seem to really like each other and are getting along well. I wasn't serving them however. About halfway through their meal I notice them holding hands over the table. Cute. Then, the guy lifts her hand to his lips and kisses the back of it. A bit of an outdated gesture, but still cute I guess. The woman seems slightly confused but goes along with it. A little while later I see the guy do it again. Okay, dude. Then again. Woman is confused and looks a little uncomfortable. They are no longer holding hands. I go to serve my table and see the dude full on MAKING OUT with her hand, tongue and all. Woman looks extremely embarrassed and uncomfortable, looking everywhere but at her date. I go over and casually ask if they need anything, and the dude stops. Woman yanks her hand back. She left pretty soon after.
The Cutest Karma
I had a 2 top in a small booth and across from them was a family of 6. The 2 top was in their mid 40's maybe 50. I was delivering food to the 6 top and I was being berated for not using legs with my big trays, so I grabbed a pair and headed off. When I was setting them down a stacked plate on my tray shifted to the side and the whole tray pitched toward the 6 top. I panicked and tried to stop it from falling and it all went backwards off the tray.
Unluckily I didn't hear a single plate shatter. I turned around and the woman at the 2 top had rib sauce on her face, mashed potatoes in her bust, and broccoli all over her lap. I started with, "I'm so sorry ma'am. Please stand up and we'll get you cleaned up."
My 6 top was forgotten at that moment. I pleaded with her to get up so we could clean her off, someone produced a towel for me, I had 2 managers trying to help. She was so polite and insistent that it was nobody's fault. Her husband finally said, "at least wipe the sauce off your face." And she laughed and got up.
Everything was comped on their ticket including alcohol. It was the only tray I ever dropped and they never made me use legs again.
They came back in and asked for me the next week. The husband told me they were celebrating 30 years together that night. I felt horrible. Then he told me on their first date she made spaghetti, and accidentally dumped it in his lap. He told her it was karma and they had a huge laugh, and a free meal.
These Gestures Are Offensive In Other Countries | George Takei’s Oh MyyyPeople explain the friendly gestures in one country that are offensive in another. It's imperative to do a little research about the destinations and culture...
The House Wine
I worked as a waitress in an Italian restaurant while in uni in 2006. Obvious first date comes in. He's booked it and requested a table in a secluded area of the restaurant because the acoustics would be perfect.She arrives and asks to move table to by the window. No big deal. He's annoyed at this.
They ordered a carafe of the house red with their meals. Anything she said he'd turn it into some achievement he'd already accomplished. He kept making comments about her order, such as how fattening a dish would be etc,and then proceeded to say his family owned a vineyard and he knew a good red wine when he smelt one.
He then asked for the most expensive wine on the menu and to take away the what he called "piss of a house wine" then talked about how the bouquet was different and the clarity was so much better on the "expensive" wine.
When it came to dessert she had enough of his bull and flipped when he said that she shouldn't have any or she'd end up with stretch marks. She was a bit overweight but not overly so. She stood up and yelled at him for being a condescending piece of garbage, for knowing nothing at all about wine and dropped the coup de grâce that her father was our wine supplier and that the "piss of a house wine" red was exactly the same as the most expensive wine (all of which was totally true).
He was left speechless with the full check to pay.
Why She Loved That Waitress
I was the person on a terrible first date.
It was unusual because he picked a very fancy location that was way out of town (like an hour drive), I normally prefer casual dates like walking in the park, or coffee but he insisted we go.
I arrived first and when I sat down I ordered a drink (strawberry lemonade I don't drink alcohol) and was talking to the waitress saying I was waiting on a date, she was super nice to me and said "oh I hope it's fun good luck!"
Once he arrived suddenly her mood shifted, she gave him an attitude when he ordered. He was trying to bully me into getting some alcohol but I was firm and said I would stick to my strawberry lemonade. Throughout the date he kept trying to order me vodka.
Waitress was being really weird and kept complimenting me and giving me free lemonades, refills every two minutes and basically giving him dirty looks and stayed close by always watching. The guy was being a prick about the situation and started acting rude, "I hope she's not gonna charge for those." He looked incredibly angry and uncomfortable.
I was starting to wonder why this waitress was being so mean so I went to the bathroom and waited to flag her down.
She told me he goes there every other weekend with a new girl and that the girls would walk out of there acting very drunk.
I did confront him and he admitted he gets girls drunk to sleep with him with pressure tactics. I took off right when he said that and the waitress took me to my car, I made sure to give all the cash I had as a tip.
I seriously love that waitress, and I'll never forget her.
Not a server but a bartender. My girlfriend was serving an obvious first date and they were ordering an alarming amount of drinks with 30 minutes of sitting down, I ask my gf what was going and and she said the girl was doing all of the shots they ordered. I walked from behind the bar to the bathroom purely to check in on the situation and good lord this girl on the date was blasted and just dropping the f-bomb every other word.
Eventually the chick went outside to smoke and the dude B-lined to the bar and asked if he could give me money for the waitress and sneak out (actually gave $200 for a $70 tab so nice)...the girl came back in and ate the food they ordered then tried to order more drinks. Had to throw her out and she started calling me the n word. I'm very much a white dude. Bizarre night that my girl and I still talk about years later.
The Hipster King And His Moral MountainGiphy
Oh yes! I've got the mother of all hipster dates!
So I was at Father's Office, it's kind of a trendy beer /hipster/ amazing food/ show that is wall to wall packed every night.My friends and I are enjoying what could possibly be the best burger ever made. I'm drinking a beer.
This place is set up kind of strange. You have 2 bars along the back wall, some tables in the middle for dinner and a ring of booths around the rest of the bar. Not a lot of room to move around or really have private space. It didn't really bother me because I was having an orgasmic out of body experience with this burger.
Until in walks the king of all of the Los Angeles hipsters...
This guy had every article of hipster clothing on. That stupid Amish hat, the fruit pattern button up shirt sleeve shirt, the swacket (sweater-jacket), burgundy corduroy pants, and yes deck shoes. His face was adorned with your typical hipster add ons; the septum piercing, gauges, those awful Harry Potter glasses, patchy stubble and a 80's porn star mustache. Bracelets clanking off his Apple watch he saunters in to the bar and plops himself in the booth behind me. My back is to his back, and I can feel the Mumford and Sons rolling out of his soul.
He orders some nonsense beer and begins to make "work" calls on his ridiculous watch... in a bar loud enough to bother my deaf uncle. So pretentious. His voice sounds like the Chipmunks smoked camel unfiltered's and drank wild turkey. I am immediately in hate with this walking skidmark on the underwear of society.
That is until the crowds around the bar part and in walks the most incredibly attractive ordinary girl I've ever seen. I know that sounds confusing but just think about it. We've all seen someone like that before, nothing really special about them... But all of the normality is just perfect. She is wearing jeans with a black v-neck shirt. She is rocking some really nice Jimmy Choo's (yes I know what those are don't judge me) I can tell she just got done with work because she has that "I want to go home and make love to my bed" look.
She smiles at our table as she walks by and then very sensually slides into the booth with the hipster King. My friends and I give each other that "here comes the show" look. He introduces himself, she introduces herself it's fairly normal conversation.
Then she asks what he does for work and the gates of hipster hell open. Apparently, he is the most accomplished man in the entire city of LA. He is a writer, a director, an actor, a vegan food expert, wine expert, tech genius who makes million dollar apps as a hobby, has a charity, and most importantly is involved in the weed industry. He says all of this in the most condescending tone possible; like she could never measure up to his incredible portfolio.
My table is struggling not to laugh as we listen to this modern day million dollar man tell this girl that he is probably a way better human being than she could ever hope to be. How he is totally down with black lives matter, how he donated buckets of money to Hillary Clinton's campaign. His moral fiber is so strong that scientist are trying to use it to catch meteors.
Now at this point I can't see her face, remember she is facing my back. But I have to see how she is reacting to this guy's PR interview... so I very casually stand up to stretch... and as I put my arms out I turn my head to look at her. She has this look of confusion sprinkled with disgust and a little dash of just being done with this entire situation. I unfortunately catch her eye and we link telepathically. Her eyes are saying "Can you believe this?"
My eyes respond "I'd save you but I don't want his words touching the air around me."
I finish my stretch and sit back down. My friends are giggling like a bunch of girls drunk on box wine. He is rambling on about how corporate America is responsible for all the evils in the world. I hear a very loud sigh and she finally says:
"Look my friend set this up, I'm really tired from work and I don't want to sit here and watch you build this moral high ground mountain that you're apparently so intent on building. Have a great night best of luck."
You could hear the air leaving this man child's body as she got up and walked away. Disappearing into the crowd like a victorious warrior.
But that wasn't the end!
He gathered his thoughts and started making calls on his watch as loudly as possible so everyone could hear how important he is. He sat at that table nursing that one beer for an entire hour. Just being an in-the-way person, a person so repugnant that the wait staff didn't even come to his table. Oh and the cherry on top of the douche Sunday? He only tipped 10% on his bill.
Couple years ago, I was tending bar at a high-end steak joint. A pretty brunette walked in and sat down at the bar. After fixing her a cocktail, I asked if she'd like to see a dinner menu. She explained that she was waiting for a date.
A few moments later, the guy arrived carrying a large bag.
It was immediately obvious this date was their first. Their conversation was lurching from forced to downright painful when he reached into the bag and pulled out an album containing...
...his Pokemon card collection.
He set the book on the bar and thumbed through each page, thoroughly and lovingly describing every card, attempting to educate his date in the ways of Japanese pocket monsters. I'll be fair to the guy - dude was passionate.
She feigned an emergency and called her friend to pick her up. He stayed and ate a plain hamburger at the bar. Both of these people were in their mid-30's.
Should Have Checked
I work as a part time waiter and one evening there was a couple in their 30s (he was probably in his way 40s) which seemed as a first date. At the beginning all was ok, she was laughing and being quite nice. He was same with her but pretty rude and condescending with me but fine.
At some point he goes to sit next to her, forces a kiss, caresses her hair and the woman looks very shocked and tries to back off. He still doesn't get the hint. Later, I heard her saying to him it will not work, she just doesn't feel it, etc. At this point I was pretty worried as he seemed to choke her, asking why, still trying to kiss her, his voice sounding quite angry and very insistent.
I wanted to write her a note when he was in the toilet if she needs help as she started to look worried that he will not leave her alone. Pretty soon they left and I was worried for her all night, should've offered to help her.
Snatching Defeat From The Jaws Of Victory
Lived in a small town at the time, one of those "Gotta escape from here" type places. At a brew house type place with a friend enjoying the evening off work and witnessed an absolute trainwreck. Guy who moved away comes back to wine and dine an old fling, but just trying so hard.
Bragged about his healthy six-figure income, bragged about how worldly he's become. Talked about himself like he was Elon Musk for the entire date without allowing a single shift in the conversation to allow for anything but himself. Poor girl just sat and politely responded with one-word answers of encouragement when she was allowed to while this torrent of exaggerated success gushed out towards her.
I've never felt so bad for someone in a date situation before, she started the date so impressed and seemed very into him, but was just so clearly over it by the end.
Guy likely did have a whole lot going for him (exaggerated, but even without embellishment) but just refused to ever stop talking about himself. He talked himself out of a second date and likely never realized it. Hilarious but brutal.
Their Bad Date Becomes Someone Else's Good Date
I asked out a girl I was friends with to a date to see if we can be more than just friends. It was kind of awkward and we couldn't think of anything to talk about. We already knew each-other pretty well. While we were there another couple shows up and sits in the booth behind us. I can tell it was their first date too because they kept talking about what they were into (at the time I wish my date was going like that).
But after a while the girl asks the guy what his favorite thing to eat was and he replied "the thing in between your legs". There was a pause and she said "I'll ask again, what's your favorite thing to eat". His reply didn't change and we heard her slap him across the face and walk out. He got up and left and me and my date started laughing. It was pretty sad their date didn't go well but it gave me and my date something to talk about that evening
I worked at a small restaurant and there was this nice lady that walked in. She sat at a table and ordered two drinks. I came back ever 5 minutes but 30 had passed and her date hadn't arrived. I ordered her some chips and salsa and put it on my tab to try and make her feel better.
She kept getting texts from him saying he would be there but she had been waiting for almost an hour. So about 20 minutes before we close, 1 and a half hours she had been there, she was ready to leave. The this guy struts in here, with a huge ass hickey on his neck, and went up to her. He tried to explain how his car broke down but we could tell from his messed up outfit and hickey that this definitely wants the case.
So she looked him in the eyes, grabbed her purse, and hit the guy. The proceeded to walk out. The guy looked shocked. He the at down and ordered food, of course I told him we were closing and when he tried to argue I kicked him out. Smh, some people.
Stood Up. Walked Out.
So this is... two fold.
Firstly, I grew up and lived in a fairly small town. There were about 3 diners/restaurants in town. I worked part time at a Goodwill, and then part time at nights over at one of the local bar/restaurants.
So one time I'm working at my Goodwill job and this guy asks me out. I don't really like being asked out at work but I was young and far more willing to put up with bullshit than I am now. I agree and ask if he has any preference of the 3 restaurants. He picks my restaurant. I didn't mention I worked there, but I said something along the lines of 'oh, that's great!' and we work out a time and day.
The night we were supposed to go out, I go to the bar and sit down and start chatting with the bartender/my coworker and just enjoy not being at work while being at work (weirdly liberating). He's 30m late. Then an hour. Doesn't pick up when I call. So I just order food, do some karaoke with the bartender, have fun, go home.
Fast forward like. A week. Maybe a little more but certainly not much. I'm waiting in the back section when the hostess seats a couple at one of my tables. I finish up another table's bill to drop off and then walk over.
Y'all can guess who it was.
This guy sees me, clearly in uniform for the place, goes absolutely beet red, excuses himself for (what his new date thinks is) no reason, and leaves. His date and I watch him pull out of the parking lot.
"I hope he wasn't your ride?"
I asked if she still wanted to order and she said she might as well since she was already here, and later I explained what happened. We both laughed.
So I have this concept I call "Emotional Velociraptors" - they're the people that stay in your life testing your fences for weak spots after you've set a boundary.
Rom-coms like to frame it as one person being madly in love and the other just not realizing they're in love yet. It's determination, it's devotion, it's "true love" and so romantic!
Nah, it's totally disregarding your boundaries and your autonomy and collectively can we just ... ya know ... NOT?
Hanging around waiting for someone to be emotionally compromised so you can swoop in and "save the day" with your love is predatory.
"Wearing them down" until they say yes to a date is predatory.
Sabotaging their friendships and other relationships in the hopes that they'll "fall back" to you is predatory.
Not romance. Raptors. Now cut it out!
Reddit user MysteryScallop asked:
"What do people need to stop romanticizing?"
And hey, would you look at the very first response, it's our good friend Rom-coms!
But they're not alone here. This list is full of messiness, take a look.
Rom-Coms Need To Be StoppedBbc Starz GIF by Dublin MurdersGiphy
"People dropping all their own goals and interests for someone else. Yes, the plot of standard rom-com."
"Which brings us to stalking. Also romanticised in rom-coms."
"It's scary how people in these threads I see are sometimes just like 'no this is so romantic' and 'oh look at their relationship progressing' while I'm like 'no wtf?! this is the behavior of a crazy person that I wouldn't want anything to do with in real life ever!' "
"Doesn't just go for stalking, goes for a lot of things really. Rom-coms/dramas etc are good at romanticizing these really weird and super unhealthy things."
"Do you know the series 'You' on Netflix?"
"The protagonist believes he is the hero of a romance. Just watch the trailer, I love it. It's relevant."
Manic Pixie Superpowers?Sarcastic Rose Byrne GIF by Apple TVGiphy
"Mental illness is a serious condition. Having one does not make you cool, unique, or insightful. It's a disaster."
"The people who call ADHD a 'superpower' are just flat out wrong. ADHD is super debilitating overall."
"While there are some things we can do 'better' than people who are neurotypical, overall ADHD is extremely hard to manage and often can destroy a person's home life, school and/or career."
"Things aren't structured for us. At all. It's really hard to function."
"Some individuals go as far as fetishsizing people with mental illness and its disgusting. That Manic Pixie Dream Girl is suffering."
"Some people called my autism a 'superpower' because smart or rich people also have autism and are really successful (Elon musk, Bill gates etc).but their superpower isn't autism, it's being a rich white guy."
"People don't seem to realize what Savant Syndrome is or what privilege is and just believe everyone with a mental illness or disability is some secret untapped genius, which is not the case."
"I don't have a 'superpower' and am not incredibly smart, what is different is my breakdowns which aren't fun believe it or not."
FollowersSocial Media Reaction GIF by TravisGiphy
"I had an acquaintance tell me that he really liked this guy he had gone on a few dates with, but the the guy had less than 1000 Instagram followers, and he saw that as a red flag."
"We were probably 19/20 at the time, in college. This guy was obsessed with social media appearances. He would only post photos of himself with people who he deemed attractive enough."
"Once my roommate, her other friend, him & I all went out. He knew my roommates friend on the same level as me, just acquaintances. No real connection."
"The friend is super pretty; she looks similar to Shay Mitchell."
"He asked to take a photo with her so he could post it on Instagram and didn’t even ask my roommate who he is ACTUALLY friends with or I to get in it LOL."
"HE was definitely the red flag in that relationship."
"Real" Fathersdarth vader father GIF by Star WarsGiphy
"My wife's ex-husband has documented schizophrenia, bi-polar and is a drug addict with a severe alcohol problem. He's also assaulted multiple people and posted pictures/bragged about nearly beating an old man to death at a gas station because he 'talked to his woman.' "
"People liked to romanticize him as just 'protective father.' "
"We lived in absolute fear anytime he got to see the kids. Would they come back with bruises, night-terrors, talking about strange people and places?"
"Or the week-long headaches with their clothes smelling of marijuana and having strange stains on them. What would go wrong this time? Or...would we even see them again?"
"Would he fly off the handle this time and beat or abandon them? Would he do what he's threatened and leave the state?"
"It's absolutely terrifying. The late night/early morning messages that didn't make sense, had him half-naked outside doing God only knows. The video chats of him being drunk or high."
"It took years to get him cut off completely, all due to the f*cking lie that 'children need their "REAL" father.'
F*ck. That. Shit. Sideways."
"No, they don't. Especially not if he's a dangerous maniac and they have a Father (ME) and only wants to love and protect them."
"He wasn't 'protective, he was violent. It cost nearly $10k and took ~5 years but he's finally been cut off."
"It only happened when he tried to break in, armed with a gun, drunk at 3am. He was caught a block away waiting for us to come out."
"Why? To be a real father and 'check on his children... with a loaded gun. The letter he wrote that they confiscated off of him that night really told what he wanted to do."
"We've since moved, and it's taken over a year of no contact for us to finally not be looking over our shoulder every second. Mental illness is awful and the man truly needs to be locked up, away from the general population with long-term care."
Caught Up In The Gameice cube film GIFGiphy
"The 'gangsta' lifestyle and all that it entails."
"I grew up in Oakland and have witnessed far too many of the people I grew with get caught up in the game. Roughly half of the guys from my former neighborhood are either serving life sentences or were killed."
"I grew up in the 80s, but it's even worse now."
"We've been glorifying lawless rebels who make their fortune through strength, cunning, and weapons since the start of time."
"Gangsters are just the modern version of outlaws, bandits, pirates, treasure hunters, and explorers. They answer to no one, they don't take any crap, you don't want to cross them, and the ones we idolize (whether real or fiction) are the ones that do that and succeed."
"We overlook the many, many examples of it being awful and focus on the few that show it being way better than our sh*tty boring, repetitive lives where we lack so much freedom."
Seriously SerialThis Is Weird GIF by Catfish MTVGiphy
"And putting details of what they did all over the media, giving them additional fame. A comic I can't recall the name of said 'I know more about Ted Bundy than I know about my family.' "
"Ted Bundy legit got hundreds of love letters from women in jail. Really strange why women would find a person who specifically murders only women attractive."
"Humans are certainly bizzarre."
"Last podcast on the left does a really good job of showing how these guys are actually just massive losers that turn to killing because it’s the easiest way they can be good at something."
"You can't possibly be a "fan" of any serial killers they talk about, because they make it very clear what pathetic and horrible people they all were."
"I absolutely loved their Charles Manson episodes. 99% of Manson-related media makes him out to be some criminal psychopath mastermind."
"LPOTL makes him out to be a horny little conman troll who had no f*cking clue what he was doing and made a bunch of choices out of sheer panic or stupidity. There's no glamour there."
It's Just A JobTired Presidential Debate GIF by INTO ACTIONGiphy
"My coworkers tend to make it a competition to see who can make the most sacrifices for their career. Who puts in the most overtime hours? Who does things off the clock for work more? Etc"
"It's bullsh*t. I have a life and a family I want to prioritize."
"Saying that you work a lot isn't the flex most people think it is. Unless you're rich or you work for yourself, you're basically admitting that you're sacrificing your life for someone else's gain."
"I can see when everyone on my team logs in and out."
"It's super common for people to start working at 4-5am and stay on until 10-11pm. I see work getting submitted at 2am. I see people logging on during weekends."
"One person even worked on Thanksgiving."
"It's like they don't know how to occupy themselves if they're not doing their job."
Hot People Can Be Evilbella swan twilight GIFGiphy
"Attractive people doing harmful things."
"People shouldn't get a pass to do toxic and rude things simply because they're attractive. Why do I see serial killers and toxic partners get romanticized simply because they're hot?"
"Why does that make their horrible actions somehow badass and charismatic??"
"Back when the Boston marathon bombing happened one of my friends on Facebook started posting a bunch of pictures of one of the bombers, talking about how she would have dreams about him and how obsessed she was with him."
"I straight up blocked her after the second or third time because I couldn't get over how messed up that was. Dude killed and maimed multiple people, his objective attractiveness became absolutely null at that point."
"Ugh Twilight absolutely romanticizes this!"
"It's NOT ROMANTIC that a guy breaks into your bedroom at night and watches you sleep. It's not suddenly less terrifying because he is hot."
Yanderemirai nikki gasai yuno GIFGiphy
"In the anime community, can we please stop with the premise of a 'Yandere,' where someone is so obsessed with someone that they'd go out of their way to hurt other people that person falls in love with."
"I once had a girlfriend in college tell me entirely seriously that she had killed someone before and would physically harm the person I went out with if I ever went out with someone else."
"It was terrifying. It led to me having a fight with another close friend before finally mustering the courage to break off the relationship."
"She's been out of my life for three years but she still causes me issues with relationships to this day (for a few other reasons as well)."
"Not once did I think it was hot to have her earnestly threaten someone else. F*ck that."
It's Not OrganizationSobbing Jamie Lee Curtis GIF by filmeditorGiphy
"It’s not quirky or funny when I’m late for work because I had to back upstairs to check that the gas stove is off for the fifteenth time because I can’t stop envisioning the whole building blowing up."
"I literally stand frozen to the spot trying to fight the urge to go back when I KNOW I CHECKED but the intrusive thoughts are too upsetting to deal with."
"OCD isn’t being cute and quirky organized."
"For me its believing that people will die if I don’t check again. Again. No again."
"Even if it hurts me. Again."
"I watched a TV series called Whitechapel where the main detective has OCD. There’s a scene of him flicking his office light switch off and on repeatedly whilst screaming his head off desperately wanting to stop."
"That is exactly what it feels like for me."
"Howie Mandel talked about this on Conan's podcast the other week."
"As an example, he said he'd miss business meetings getting stuck in a loop of checking that the front door was locked for hours."
What does it say about us as people that almost all of these were related to the ways we glamorize our own destruction?
I know I came hard for rom-coms at the beginning, but let's be honest this list is kind of disturbing. What's more, I'm sure you all have things you could add here.
So let's talk about them. What dangerously romanticized thing would you add to the list?
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How does the director and the DP figure it all out? How do they see the colors?
I've seen some shots that have left me breathless.
It's all genius.
Redditor dilapidatedbunghole wanted to talk about the beauty of cinema, by asking:
"What is the most aesthetically pleasing movie you've ever seen?"
'American Beauty,' that was the first film I truly began to appreciate the aesthetic of cinema. The roses, the reds, the blues, and how it was all married... brilliant!
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"'Oh Brother Where Art Thou,' it was just so visually unique and the slightly aged color tinting with the old music worked together so well." ~ educatedpotato1
"The Fall was gorgeous. For clarification, the 2006 movie "The Fall.'" ~ savantard
"This is one of my secret favorite movies. I say 'secret' because most people have never heard of it and it's criminally overlooked. Gorgeously shot, and a beautiful story to boot." ~ Schneetmacher
"For anyone who doesn't know, Tarsem Singh, the director, did both 'The Fall 'and T'he Cell.' Even though it only got one season (a tragedy), I recommend NBC's Emerald City to anyone who enjoys Tarsem's work. He directed every episode. A lot of beautiful costumes on that show." ~ die-squith
"Kubo and the Two Strings was a beautiful movie, visually and musically." ~ drawfanstein
"I think it didn’t get the recognition it deserved because a lot of people found the storyline lacking in comparison to the other movies studio laika produced. But the movie was seriously stunning and definitely in the lead for most beautiful (Coraline is the runner-up imo)." ~ Lihork
"'The Secret of Kells.' Everything by Cartoon Saloon is absolutely beautiful, but this one also has the perfect match of subject matter and art style." ~ Murgatroyd314
"I like to describe the art/animation style as 'Genndy Tartakovsky on mushrooms, possessed by a monk's ghost.' Even when not on psychedelics I weep with both joy and sadness at multiple points in the film because of how much emotion the mise-en-scene is able to evoke." ~ I_Do_Not_Abbreviate
The Flowaudrey tautou amelie breaks the 4th wall GIF by MauditGiphy
"Amélie. The color scheme is warm and welcoming, the storyline flows beautifully, and the soundtrack is brilliant and whimsical, not to mention how talented each actor is. This is my favorite movie." ~ ItStillIsntLupus
My movie bucket list is growing. There is clearly much to study.
Long and Sandytrue detective desert GIFGiphy
"'Laurence of Arabia.' I don’t care for long movies or deserts, and it’s still just very pretty." ~ akaCatt
"'The good, the bad and the ugly' is a strangely beautiful movie." ~ tsaroz
"A lot of the old spaghetti westerns are beautifully shot. And the pacing is tightly controlled to make sure you experience it. Watching these movies in my 40s when I'm more patient is a much different experience than when I was a kid and bored waiting for the gunfights." ~ allboolshite
Sing 2 Me
"Song of the sea." ~ KiviRinne
"Scrolled way too far to find a Cartoon Saloon movie. Everyones mentioning Ghibli, and they're not wrong to do so. But Cartoon Saloon is criminally underrated. 'Secret of Kells, Song of the Sea, and Wolfwalkers.' Some of the most visually beautiful films on the planet." ~TheBlueHeron
In the Woods
"1917 was really nice, even though it was mostly bland brown colors for the majority but the scene in croisilles wood with Jos Slovik singing 'poor wayfairing stranger' is probably my favourite cinematographic moment in film." ~ ravioli_knight2
"The French town at night is my favorite part of that film shot-wise. Flares illuminating the ruins, the glow of burning buildings, shadows everywhere, and one small little fire-lit enclave where a hapless civilian still resides." ~ Metlman13
"This was the movie that popped into my head first. It was so well done, and even though the colors are all similar, the lighting, angle of the shot, and noise/lack of noise all made it so pleasant to watch. Especially being filmed to look like a one-shot movie, it just kept me on the edge of my seat and all the more wrapped up in the cinematography." ~ anony_moose9889
"Annihilation is very unsettlingly pretty." ~ Weirdguy149
"The strange beauty is one of the best aspects of the movie. It gives 'The Shimmer 'this sort of 'devil-may-care' personality. The mutations occur in whatever way it seems necessary in each life form. On one hand you get these beautiful deer-like creatures with flowering branches for antlers. On the other hand." — Screambear.
I love movies. And I'm glad I'm not alone. Tell me more... what else should we be watching?
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How high was God or whoever when they designed the human body? Clearly they needed a crash course in anatomy.
The body is amazing and resilient, but it can also be a hot mess.
Why are so many areas susceptible to pain? Like, one bad fall on a knee and you could be hobbled for life.
They should be more bulletproof. And the eyes, why so fragile when a wild eyelash gets caught in a blink?
So many questions. If the body was intended to last ten decades or so, it should be a bit more bionic.
Redditor MrBowls wanted to get into details about anatomy and it's issues, they asked:
"What’s the worst designed part of the human body?"
I have pain everywhere. Just because I'm not twenty anymore doesn't mean my body gets to just give in. I know I could help more with that issue, but I feel like my design should be more automatically durable.
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"Honestly our appendixes try to kill us too often. Something ain’t right with it." ~ moonbarrow
"The sciatic nerve routing. Going through the periformis muscle was a bad idea." ~ Sleepdprived
"Just FYI: actually passing through the muscle is an anatomical variant. For the majority of people, the nerve just travels alongside the muscle. Still, that variant is a... uh, pain in the butt." ~ EauEwe
"I'm currently experiencing sciatica right now. It's a nerve being pinched by your spine or muscle in the lower back. The best way I can explain is like a scalpel scraping off your bone marrow throughout your entire leg 24/7."
"It's physically and mentally excruciating so much so that people who suffer from it would rather have their entire leg amputated than live through it. And the thing is this is not an uncommon medical condition. Since the cause is usually a spinal injury, it takes way longer to recover than other injuries, so you're pretty much sleep deprived and exhausted from the pain at every moment until it resides. I'm 25 right now and my first sciatic episode started when I was 21" ~ psyatica
"Teeth, one set while we're a child, one set for 60/70 years." ~ godca_grema
"Meanwhile sharks, the lucky bastards, just keep growing new teeth." ~ XxsquirrelxX
"We used to call my brother Shark Boy growing up. That dude had LAYERS of teeth. He had one tooth that grew in the roof of his mouth."
"He also had teeth growing sideways in his gums which torqued his other teeth. It took 2.5 years to get him prepped for orthodontics and then he was in braces for another 5 years after that. Worth it though, he looks like a Colgate commercial now." ~ justuselotion
"The ear. Eyes have eyelids, you can close your mouth, but if there’s an extremely loud noise, your ear drum has to just take it and be irreversibly ruined." ~ sicknessandpurgatory
"Well technically there is a muscle that can tighten your ear to prevent damage from extreme noise, it’s the same reason you don’t hear yourself chew. Some new cars will make a sound to trigger this muscle to prevent hearing loss from the noise of an accident." ~ engineer_doc
HeeledSoccer Celebrate GIF by Indiana HoosiersGiphy
"Achilles tendon. Single point of vulnerability that has no bone sheath and will absolutely cripple you if it's f**ked with." ~ Torvaun
Why do we have an appendix? And why is it a ticking time bomb? All good questions.
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"A bony butt! It actually hurts to sit still." ~ thatluckyfox
"The elbow. Why the f**k is there a nerve that's so exposed, when you hit it at just the right spot it sends a jolt down your arm?!" ~ hikoboshi_sama
"It’s not just one nerve. You’re talking about the brachial plexus. It’s a bundle of nerves that come from your spine and innervates all the muscles in your arm. That’s why stingers hurt so much, it’s taking out every nerve."
"It’s also a good site for nerve blocks when you have upper limb surgery because you can disable the arm and reduce post operative pain by applying anaesthesia around the nerve roots. Also, in the case of brachial plexus avulsions, you lose all function permanently. And on that note, nerve injuries are freaking crap. We should be able to regenerate them more easily and quickly." ~ ShibuRigged
"Knees are a good idea, but needed a bit more R&D before being rolled out." ~ ChampionshipMission
"Came here to say this. Have you ever seen a child try to make a spaceship or a suit of armor out of cardboard, but they don't have enough cardboard and none of the pieces really fit together anyway, so they end up lashing it together with dozens of strips of tape at every possible angle until it just barely holds together? That's knees. That's how your knees are made." ~ DerCatzefragger
"Having sharpened rocks that slowly push their way through the sensitive gums of tiny humans who are too small to understand or explain the reason for their incessant crying. Bonus bad points for these tiny humans being designed to get 100% of their nutrition by latching their new razor teeth around the nipples of another human." ~ PoetryOfLogicalIdeas
E is for Emptypoop toilet GIF by Poo~PourriGiphy
"Bowels. I should be able to decide when to empty them completely! In one go and not little bit now and more later!"
"Edit: All this fibre talk, I get it. I now understand more about the importance of fibre. But that kinda adds to what I'm saying. Imagine not needing a summoning ritual. Like deciding when you do and don't drop the kids off at the pool. A human eject button." ~ J1ra1y4
The bowels, they never let up. And like I said earlier, the knees have it. Ankles, knees, elbows, the keys to a happy life.
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A boss can make or break a job.
Worse still, is when a bad boss asks you to get in on their badness, forcing you to choose between the moral high-ground and a paycheck.
Kind of like what happened with these people.
Reddit user, SethmAR15, wanted to know what your employer tried to get away with when they asked:
"What’s the most unethical thing a boss has ever asked you to do?"
Sometimes it's small, but inexcusable. Nothing like a boss asking you to do more work than what's required of you, is there?
Always A Good Thing When The Boss Says, "Don't Ask Questions."
"I had a boss ask to me take a bunch of stock from the warehouse to his personal storage unit, and not to ask any questions …"
"You did it huh"
"Turns out he’s been taking ‘damaged’ goods and keeping them in a storage unit and selling them online. I let the owner of the company know (his head office happens to be at my branch) my boss didn’t last too much longer after that, I got a decent raise 6 months later… if he’d cut me in then maybe it would have been a different story."
In-Person Tutoring Is A Separate Charge
"First job after I graduated college, boss called me into his office and had me sit next to his daughter while she took an online exam, told me to make sure she passed it."
"She definitely wouldn’t have passed if I wasn’t in the room."
People's Lives Ruined
"I worked for the largest property management in San Francisco and frequently the Manager would ask us to shred checks that came to us so they could file for eviction on tenants. I quit immediately."
Sounds Like A Harassment Suit Waiting To Happen
"Branch Manager (Banking) asked me to pose in a picture, showing a lot of cleavage, to use on his construction loan website for his builders. He wanted them to ‘see’ who they would be working with in a daily basis so he could get more business."
Murder shouldn't really be a thing involved on job applications, but someone probably should have told employers like these.
I Guess Murder Is Asking For A Lot
"My old boss at dollar tree would make me drive her to the bank in my car every night. And she would have me park like 10 feet back from the ATM while she walked up to it. She told me that if someone ever tried to run up on her while she was depositing the money I had to run them over. She said if they were too close to her to just hit her as well. She was incredibly adamant that I absolutely HAD to do this and very serious."
Chemicals Or No Chemicals, You Keep Working
"Keep people at work when there was a chemical leak from the car painting shop next door, and people were getting sick."
"The boss wasn't on site (almost never was), I tried calling him and got no answer, and I was the most senior worker on site so I sent everyone home."
"When I was almost home (1h+ commute) he called me back. He had gotten my voicemail where I explained the situation and he was not happy. Apparently we should have waited it out or I should have arranged for everyone to work from home (not possible)."
"The guy was a d-ckhead but this one still makes me angry when I think about it."
Keep It Under 40 Hours
"Also at Dollar Tree, most of my cashiers were teenagers or dipsh-ts that never showed up for work so this older Korean woman kept getting called in to work the register. She was pretty much getting 40+ hours every week and open season for benefits was getting ready to start. My district manager called me and told me I had to convince her to not get any benefits or else. I told him that else better be him doing that sh-t himself because I'm not about to do his dirty work."
And then there's these stories. Bosses who make you wonder, "Is that what it takes to be in charge?" Because, wow, talk about flat out terrible people.
Lives Are Never Worth Profit
"Many, many years ago I was working as a part-time mechanic for a guy selling "restored cars". He called me in for an emergency brake repair on a TR-4. One of the rear wheel cylinders had failed and he needed it fixed ASAP. He had a buyer lined up with cash."
"Instead of having me hone and rebuild the cylinder properly (I had the tools and the kit to do so) he wanted me to cut the pipe to the rear brakes and just crimp it over onto itself, enough to stop the leak. He was in a hurry and wanted it fixed before the customer saw anything."
"I fixed it properly anyway, so that no one would die, and then rolled my toolbox out of there that very night."
Crossing A Serious Personal Line
"When I was 16 I worked at Spencer's in the mall. The store manager was a middle aged female who found out she was being demoted. She made the decision to instead quit. Her last day I happened to be closing the store with her. Nothing wierd, we had done it many times before. After everything was closed and locked up we were punching out in the back room. I went to open the door that led back into the store and she physically put her hand over it and closed it like a scene from a movie."
"Then she said "you know I make schedules right" I said "yea I understand that". She said "Do you think it's a coincidence that you and I are closing my last day? This is your opportunity to do anything that you want with me." I was so uncomfortable and I didn't know what to do, so I gave her a hug and she said really that's it.. All the while her husband and 2 kids were waiting in the car outside the mall to pick her up to pick her up."
Lesson Learned: Never Let A Boss Push You Around
"I had a manager that tried to get me to falsify reports to the feds (financial stuff). I flat out refused. Soon after I had to leave the company for I would have been fired for made up bullsh-t on his part. To this day I will never regret standing my ground."
Work for the kind of people you want to work for. Nobody says you can't just go and get a job elsewhere.
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