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Vulnerable People Reveal The Hardest Thing They've Admitted To Themselves

Vulnerable People Reveal The Hardest Thing They've Admitted To Themselves

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The truth hurts. The truth can be one of the most difficult things to face in life. And the truth can also set you free. In fact the truth in any form is the gateway to self freedom. We all do wrong in life and hiding away our craven thoughts and mistakes can compile on so many things like guilt and sadness, which makes the situation so much more unbearable. Sometimes the hardest things in life to understand are also the greatest learning lessons.

Redditor _\shokusei _**asked some people to share... **\What's the hardest thing you've ever had to admit to yourself?

PLAY PRETEND...

That the only way to stop being lonely was to act like I wasn't lonely in the first place. It totally worked, I even wrote a post about it on /r/socialskills if you want some more details.

FOLLOW THE TRAIL...

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That something was definitely wrong. I bought some new shoes and it was causing tingling in my feet and legs. So I relaced them but it didn't change things.

As the days went by at work it got worse and started to make my legs go tingling further and further up. So finally I decide to get new shoes on my weekend. The next day my hands start tingling.

The day after that it has traveled all the way up my arm and so I could feel it in my pec area.

So this was the point, both my entire legs and my arms had started to lose feeling I finally told my wife "okay time for a doctor, my bad for me not addressing this a few weeks ago." Turned out to be MS

DON'T MAKE IT A REALITY...

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Just because something COULD happen, doesn't mean it WILL. You don't always get closure, relationships don't always pan out the way you thought, your life doesn't always follow the script, it's not a movie.

But, I don't let it bring me down, because it holds true for good AND bad things. Sometimes, I've been so sure something would never happen, and then it just does, completely at random. I just try my best to be open to all the twists and turns life throws my way.

LISTEN CLOSELY...

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I wasn't the perfect friend in an unappreciative world, I was actually bad at being a friend and an annoying person in general.

I was always thinking, "I am such a nice person, I am so thoughtful, I am such a good listener, yet people don't want to stay friends with me for some reason - they think I am uncool and can't think for themselves." I guess I was like a NiceGuyTM but in the friendship sense. I wasn't being such a great friend really, I was using being nice in a transactional way, I thought: I am nice to you, you will be friends with me. I wasn't being thoughtful for people because I really cared, it was just another bit of good will I wanted to trade for companionship. And I wasn't a "good listener," I just felt that it was what people wanted so I gave to them.

My kindness was shallow and craven, and people could tell. I didn't realize that people don't want some sad, overly-sensitive person -- at least not emotionally healthy people. They want people who are fun, who can roll with the punches, who don't make you feel like you need to boost their flagging ego constantly by gushing over their cloying gestures. Friendships are about balance, give and take. People who make good friends, people with healthy egos, don't like to be made to feel like they are the taker all the time or on the receiving end to friendly gestures that are just too much.

IT'S QUIET TIME...

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I talk too loud, getting overly excited and brash, while talking about topics that interest me in social settings. Alcohol also increases my volume and assertiveness.

STUPID IS AS STUPID DOES...

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That I'm not as smart as I think I am. I'm not always right. In fact it's better to keep in mind that there's always a possibility that I'm wrong. It opens my mind a lot more, makes me more understanding and just less condescending in general.

JUST SAY NO!

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It's okay to say no. I'm a people pleaser and it's been an uphill battle for me to learn to stand up for myself and not let people take advantage of me.

GET OUT OF YOUR WAY...

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That some of my patterns of behaviors and thinking were destructive and only resulted in my sabotaging myself.

However, it's also the best thing I've admitted to myself because it allowed me to look at the root of the problem and address it. There's a lot of work to be done, but I believe it'll only help better my relationship with myself and others, and help me become my best self.

PEACE OUT...

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That just because someone is fundamentally a wonderful person, it doesn't mean that they're the right person for me.

Sometimes it's fairer to break things off rather than just spending the rest of your life sort-of-happy-maybe-if-you-squint-a-bit. Better for all concerned.

OWN UP!

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A lot of my problems are my fault.

Tiger3546

Some are, some aren't.

I read in a book that it doesn't matter whether or not something was our fault. What matters is that no matter what happens to us (and who was at fault), we must take responsibility for how we respond.

mrsclause2

MISTAKES GET MADE...

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That i officially screwed up my college degree by a year. It was hard to gulp down that news.

SORRY... TRULY...

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That even though I have a good heart, I've done some crappy things that I can't take back.

WHEN IT'S DONE... IT'S DONE!

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I'm not getting a second chance with her, no matter how badly I want it. She has moved on and completely forgotten about me.

HEY GIRL HEY!

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The gay wasn't going away.

WanderToWhere

That was a tough thing to admit to myself.

Flick1981

Same here. Took me 8 or 9 years to admit that one to myself after the first realization that I pushed right down to the bottom of my subconscious. To be fair, I was only 13 or 14 when it struck me for the first time, attending a catholic school and with a publicly anti gay marriage father. Years later I was talking with a girl online who I thought was cool, and she was talking about her experience of being gay. And I was like...wait, that's me too...

colourfulsoul369

CHANGE THE MINDSET...

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That I am my own biggest problem, and will never be happy because I don't feel I deserve it.

DON'T WORRY BE HAPPY...

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That I feel numb inside. You know when people say jokes or you say jokes and your laugh feels empty? But you can fake it to make it sound like it's real? Or when you smile and it doesn't reach your eyes? Or when people ask you how you feel about them and you just lie because you don't feel anything at all when looking at them or even when you try so hard to say anything? That's what I feel everyday and I had to admit to myself that I am not happy and that I don't recall when the last time I truly was.

KEEP THE TOXIC BACK...

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That the 13 year friendship I had with one of my best friends was toxic and irreparable. I always made excuses for it because of the length of time and the closeness of our friendship, but when I took a step back I realized it had all the clear red flags of an emotionally abusive relationship. That's when I realized I really didn't want the emotional and mental weight of being in that friendship anymore.

MEOW...

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That I already had enough cats.

YOU ONLY NEED YOU...

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I might die alone and that's ok. Living a full life might be enhanced by someone else but it's not a requirement.

PREACH!!!!

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That not everyone likes me and it's ok to say no to people.

How People Would React If They Randomly Saw Their Ex On The Street

Reddit user rageondad asked: 'You see your first ex on the street, what do you do?'

People on a busy street
Photo by Jason Wong on Unsplash

We all find ourselves having an unexpected run-in with someone we know on the street every now and then.

In some cases, it's a pleasant surprise and plans are immediately made to catch up.

In other cases, you dig out the first excuse you can to keep on moving, as this particular individual was not someone you hoped would re-enter your life.

Then, of course, there are the times you run into an ex.

Whether you ended things amicably or acrimoniously, it's always going to be an awkward encounter.

Just how awkward it will be, however, depends on your reaction.

Redditor rageondad was curious to hear how people would react if they unexpectedly saw their ex on the street, leading them to ask:

"You see your first ex on the street, what do you do?"

Nothing But Happy Memories...

"1st ex: say hi, nice conversation."

"All good."

"2nd ex: hide from her again, like I did that one time at the gas station."- jfg1435

Who?

"Ignore him because he’s not worth saying hi to."

"And I wouldn’t care about him at all."- Big-Elevator2491

One Way To Handle It...

"Start taking a sh*t on the side walk immediately."- ceiling_fanzz

Excuse Me What GIF by BounceGiphy

No Harm, No Foul

"Say hi."- hot-breadfruit_poop

"And ask how they are doing."

"I'm a curious creature, what can I say?"- Lamacorn

Nothing But Excitement

"Give each other a huge hug."

"We're going to see each other next week for the first time in 25 years."

"It'll be good."

"We've remained friends this whole time, so we're both looking forward to it."- riceme0112358

"Say hi, give him a hug, ask him what he's doing in town."- m00nf1r3

Couple Love GIF by PantayaGiphy

Ouch!

"Didn't you die?" -Reddit

"Wonder who dug her up."- 8urfiat

"Walk On By..."

"Just keep walking."- MythicalMicrowave

Walking By Moe Szyslak GIF by Football AustraliaGiphy

Even If It Means J-Walking

"Cross the street."- no_days_grace

Avoiding Your Ex In Five D's...

"Dodge, dip, duck, dive, and dodge."- catinatank·

The Passage Of Time

"I would wish her well if I recognized her."

"It’s been over 20 years since I’ve seen her."

"It’s not like we parted on bad terms or anything."- Fangsong_37

Lana Parrilla GIF by Paramount+Giphy

Go For The Jugular

"You've sure gotten old."- drpepper1992

About Face

"Run."- saus_blu

Remain Amicable

"Have a chat."

"We are still friends."- Mentalfloss1

Meg Ryan Comedy GIF by Coolidge Corner TheatreGiphy

Of course, the worst element of surprise is having no idea how we might react.

Try as we might to plan just what we'd do should we ever run into an ex, we can't possibly know what will actually happen should that moment arrive.

Though, hopefully it won't ever lead to defecating on the street.


A happy woman
Joel Mott/Unsplash

When you're not particularly having a good day, the smallest compliment goes a long way.

All it takes is for someone to acknowledge your new hairstyle or say something nice about your outfit for the day that can be the biggest mood booster.

It doesn't have to be a big overture or a dramatic declaration, but it's nice to be noticed, isn't it?

Curious to hear examples of how someone made their day, Redditor Bacibaby asked:

"What is a compliment you will remember till you die?"

Some people are affable but aren't aware of how much they're appreciated for it.

A Bright Light In The World

"Someone once told me: 'It's so easy introducing you to people, you make everyone feel like you're their best friend."'

"Have held onto that for over ten years, still helps to remember when I'm not at my best."

– DashFromtheGash

Genuinely Popular

"I feel this. Last year I ran into some people I graduated high school with. A few of them were super popular during that time. One of them said 'Dude, everyone loved you in high school. I don't think there was anyone else that was able to be such good friends with so many different people and be in so many different cliques.' "

"It felt like such a genuine statement. They didn't have to say that. I've thought about it almost every day since because, to my recollection, high school was rough on me."

– sonofab*tchXmustXpay

Highly Respected

"Jeez, years ago I was at a party sometime after I graduated high school. There was a kid there who I had had a few classes with throughout the years and I always spoke to him casually like I would with anyone, but we weren't close friends or anything. He had clearly been drinking a bit because he was pretty animated and talkative and this kid usually kept to himself. Quiet is an understatement."

"He approached me and said 'Toh, I have never told you this, but I have always thought highly of you. Back in middle school there were kids making fun of the janitor and you told them all off. You told them he was working hard and there is nothing funny or to be looked down upon about taking pride in your work, no matter what you do.'"

"It almost made me tear up. I had no recollection of this moment he was talking about, but I knew I must have done it because my words in that memory of his were my father's. My parents both always hammered it into me to be a person of dignity, integrity and character. Middle school was a really tough time for me. I was bullied relentlessly. Knowing that there was someone out there who admired me during that time healed a part of little me."

– TopangaTohToh

It may be vain but getting noticed in the looks department is not such a bad thing.

Women Loving Other Women

"I was in my early 20s and I went out on the town with some girlfriends. I wore an outfit that was way out of my comfort zone. It was a black short skirt (I always wear pants) that flared out with a matching top. It showed a bit of midriff and I was self conscious."

"Before we even got into the bar, we ran into a couple of girls we didn’t know outside. I remember the one girl did a double take and just started freaking out. She went on and on and told me how gorgeous I looked and how amazing my outfit was. She had obviously been drinking, but it didn’t matter. She changed my whole night around and I suddenly felt like the hottest girl on the planet. I still remember her voice when I’m trying to pump myself up in the morning."

"I love women who love women."

– littlepinch7

Being Noticed

"Nothing feels better than when a pretty/well-dressed woman compliments you or your outfit 🥲 Every single time a gorgeous girl has called me 'pretty' or complimented me lives rent-free in my head."

– tigerribs

Train Station Affirmation

"After a concert I was on my way home with the train. I also wore an outfit out of my comfort zone, but I challenged myself. At the train station I walked passed to girl(who was drunk) and one said to the other 'omg did you se how beautiful she was?!' There was only me and them. She made my day."

– MinellaRibert

Noticed By An Older Generation

"A lovely elderly lady stopped mid sentence to say 'you have got the kindest eyes.' "

– F'kMe-F'kYou

"Old ladies are the best."

– OP

"Their honesty is only matched by that of a small child."

"In between those, things get kinda weird."

– F'kMe-F'kYou

Things get a little surprising.

In The Heat Of The Moment

"When I was like 19 I had an ex who had a history of abuse. We were arguing about something (I can't remember what about) but we were both shouting at each other. Then suddenly she broke down crying and started hugging me."

"Very confused I let the moment pass until she could speak and the compliment she paid me was 'Even when you're angry at me, I'm not scared of you.' "

– KingDebone

Owning The Big Legs

"I'm tall, heavy, and plain, and have been lucky enough to avoid getting catcalled for most of my life. But one time when I was in my 20s, biking to work in DC, this little old man on a street corner did a double take as I went by, pounding away at the pedals. 'Mighty big leeeeeeeeggggs!' he hollered, whether in appreciation or astonishment I couldn't tell."

"Now whether I'm struggling to get the bike up a hill, or just feeling down on my body, I'll say to myself 'mighty big leeeeeeeeggggs!' and feel that little extra boost. They are mighty big legs, and I am grateful both to and for them!"

– ReadTheIron

Father Knows Best

"I don't know if it counts but my dad once said 'i don't say it enough, but i'm really proud of you'."

"Which was the only time he ever said it, but it meant a lot."

– justregularoleme

The next time you internally think someone you know is looking particularly good on any given day or demonstrated something you were impressed by, you should tell them how you feel.

We often have these inner monologues that we casually dismiss because we can't be bothered, which is silly because it doesn't take much effort to verbalize them.

If it's positive, we should give voice to our thoughts.

Who knows? A compliment that you think is nothing can really brighten a person's day when they're otherwise feeling very glum, and you'd be responsible for making them feel extra special and seen.​

A couple with their backs to the camera sits on a bench looking out thinking
Photo by Charlie Foster

Breaking up is hard to do.

In fact, it's one of life's hardest things.

It sucks when love is over.

But the story is always interesting.

And there is always more than one side to the tale.

When couples retell the fall of their fairytale there is always different aspects and details mentioned.

Everyone has their own view.

And it's always best to hear both.

Or is it?

Redditor U_PassButter wanted to hear several sides of a break-up story, so they asked:

"Let your Ex tell the story; why did your relationship end?"

I don't want to know what embellishments my exes would say.

I was perfect.

Just Stop

Cardi B Applause GIF by Recording Academy / GRAMMYsGiphy

"He needs to stop being so possessive and controlling. If I wanna f**k my coworker after a shift and take him back to the house and have you catch us. I fully expect you to be okay with all of it."

Initial-Attorney-578

The Privilege

“Well, the real problem was that that a**hole, aknightwhosaysnope, didn’t trust me. If he had trusted me, he never would have looked at my phone and uncovered the affair I’ve been having with one of his best friends, and I could continue to f**k that dude while allowing aknightwhosaysnope the privilege of paying my bills. What a d**k.”

aknightwhosaysnope

In April

“'I changed my phone password because I felt like it. If you need to use it I’ll open it for you.'”

"Cut to April she’s living in NY with her new boyfriend and I’m being served divorce papers. They had been dating for 6 months while we were married."

"The pandemic definitely changed some people, some for the better, but not all."

PissyMillennial

On a Saturday...

"I deliberately picked a fight just like I do every Saturday, to force him to apologize and treat me like a princess for the rest of the weekend. But this time, when I suggested that he didn't love me and we should just break up, he actually had the nerve to agree! I couldn't believe it - that line had always worked in the past to at least get roses and a gift."

"He's such an a**hole - I even refused to leave for a while, giving him the chance to apologize to me and take it back, but he was so stubborn and just flat-out refused!"

"Even when I kept calling his phone over and over from my car, insisting that we spend one last night together, he wouldn't let me back inside his place. I still can't believe that. He owed it to me to at least hold me one more time. I even told him that, and he was still a stubborn jacka** about it."

The_Law_of_Pizza

Why can't people just go to therapy?

Find yourself in trouble.

That's where you're heading.

Not Loyal

Its Over GIFGiphy

"It was long distance, I avoided all girls as she said, stayed loyal, yet one day I felt she was down, asked what's worrying you? She told me she kissed her BFF and cheated on me, a day later she ended it."

lunar_pilot

Try

"I didn't try hard enough because I couldn't handle the pressure and stress of raising 4 children all under 9 years old, a full-time job, a part-time job, all household maintenance and upkeep, and an alcoholic partner who contributed nothing to the family or the household and drank his entire paycheck every week."

Feral_Attitude

Nothing Happened

"For some reason, he didn't like that I was cuddling with my best friend on the couch. He got it into his head that I was cheating on him (or close to doing it) and decided to end the relationship. Nothing ever happened with my friend, nor did I want it to. The fact that I immediately moved with him to another country was just a coincidence."

Tiny-Device-1127

10 Years Later

"My ex (34 F) after our ten-year marriage ended: 'He was a lovely partner, most of the time. But, his depression got a hold and he just quit enjoying anything at all, including time with me. He hated himself. I couldn't put myself through it anymore'...

"Thankfully, I've (34 M) done a ton of work and found a sense of peace, and I finally love myself. It's been a couple of years now, so, the hurt has (mostly) worn off. We have to co-parent anyway, but, I've found a new friend in my ex. She really did always care about me, even if we struggled to communicate this to each other, while we were together."

nickatnite511

Sins

New Girl Facepalm GIF by HULUGiphy

"Apparently being committed to one person while dating is obsessive and to care about them even a little bit after the fact is an unforgivable sin."

TooYoungToBeThisOld1

Dating will be the death of everyone.

And apparently, so will love.

fan of 100 U.S. dollar banknotes

Alexander Mils on Unsplash

They say money can't buy happiness, but it seems it can make a lot of other people miserable.

Whether it's the housing crisis or the high cost of living, people are pointing at the 1% to accuse them of ruining things for the 99% in a multitude of ways.

Keep reading...Show less