I once met a guy who, by all accounts, appeared to have given up. And by that, I mean that they had pretty much decided that life basically ended in the 1970s and early 1980s. He had no interest in modern technology, was remarkably out of the loop when it came to technology or even current events.
This was all very frustrating to witness, but he was actually proud of himself! Proud to not know much–if anything–about the modern world. (And then he complained about how he kept having trouble finding a job.)
It was quite the flex–an unimpressive one at that.
People shared some of their thoughts with us after Redditor metallicmuffin asked the online community,'
"What unimpressive things are people idiotically proud of?"
"Missing breaks at work for a company that wouldn’t care if they died the next day."
This is a big one. It's not cute. Take your break! There's more to life than work!
"Not eating any vegetables. Known a few people state it as if it's some kind of achievement giving themselves constipation."
Knew somebody like this. They wanted to go out on a date.
We did not go out on a date.
"Going into work while sick. Had a coworker who bragged on social media about having strep throat, but was still working because she 'values hard work.'"
Some people appear to have missed the memo that risking other people's health is not a bragging right.
"I know people..."
"Drinking a lot. I know people, grown @ss people in their late 20s, who will brag about passing out on their lawns because they couldn’t make it from the car to the front door."
To be fair, they're in their 20s and most people are idiots then. They might grow out of it!
"I once had..."
"I once had a coworker brag about how dark his pee is."
Are you seriously telling us that they bragged about their kidneys not working correctly?
"I've heard that..."
"Driving better when drunk. I’ve heard that ridiculous statement more times than I should."
If some people seriously believe that, then they should not be allowed to drive.
"I overheard a co-worker recently brag to a girl that he'd already had COVID three times and during his most recent bout, he went to the gym every day that he had it."
There are so, so many things wrong with that person's statement. Can you imagine? "Sure, I got COVID, but at least I didn't miss leg day!"
"I keep hearing people..."
"Not being able to cook. I keep hearing people bragging about how the only thing they can do is boil water."
If you've made it to adulthood and you don't know how to cook for yourself, there's something gravely wrong with this picture.
"Nothing surprises me..."
"Nothing surprises me more than when people are proud of their ignorance."
Knowledge is no guarantee of wisdom but prideful ignorance is proof of its absence.
"I worked with a guy..."
"I worked with a guy who, otherwise very smart, was extremely proud of the fact that he could remove the foil from the neck of a wine bottle without cutting it. He brought it up so many times I lost count. I just let him have it, though, because he seemed to need it."
Of all the things in this thread this is the most reasonable thing to be proud of.
Let's face it, it seems like a lot of people have made over-compensating a part of their personalities.
Sadly, they don't even seem to be doing that all too well, which means we'll continue to be largely unimpressed.
Have some observations of your own? Feel free to share them with us in the comments below!
Who doesn't love a theme party?
When you not only get to dress up in something completely over the top, but also get to bear witness to everyone else's zany outfits in-keeping with the party's theme.
Be it Regency era, glam rock, or fairy tale villains.
Or what if the challenge is just to be blatantly inappropriate?
"You are going to a party. The theme is dress inappropriately. Who or what do you dress as?"
And not on your foot, one imagines...
"Nothing but a tube sock."- Sanguiniutron
"Dress normally, because if the theme is to dress inappropriately, and you dress appropriately, technically you're the one being inappropriate for the occasion."- GoAwayImHereForMemes
"I've actually been in a completely opposite situation."
"Was invited to a art exhibition, came in well dressed. It was basically porn but the person I went with forgot to mention that."
"I felt very malplace standing around people wearing next to nothing."
"So I would probably do that again because what's more inappropriate than being appropriate at an inappropriate event?"- cccantyousee
"I mean, if dressing inappropriately is the appropriate attire, then dressing appropriately would be inappropriate for the party, thus, making it appropriate."
"Now that I think about it, it's an unsolvable paradox."
"You could never appropriately dress inappropriately."- MUNKIESSGetting Ready Jimmy Fallon GIF by The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy FallonGiphy
It's all in the details
"With the pants cuffs rolled up, wearing tevas with gym socks."- BitPoet
And they say you can only wear it once...
"Bridal gown."- fromhelley
Depends on your surroundings...
"Imma wear a parka."
"In South Texas."
"In August."- Ahshalon_TeniskParka GIF by moodmanGiphy
The question is, what aren't you wearing...
"Nothing I'd just show up in lingerie."- cloboehobo
Wrong on so many levels...
"A two sizes to small wrestling singlet, and crocs."- thirdtimer_2020I Like Swimsuit GIF by MOODMANGiphy
There's little more fun than facing the challenge of dressing to impress.
Or, in this instance, un-dressing to impress.
And if you are greeted by a round of shocked expressions, you know your choice of outfit was a success.
When you're a teenager, the entire world is open to you. There's so much to do and see, and things that you see adults doing seem so lame and uninspired.
Teenagers want to be adventurous and impulsive. They aren't held back by the inhibitions adults have, but they also don't have the same life experiences as adukts. Once they do, they change.
As a teenager, I would use weekends to stay up all night to do all the things I was too busy to do during the week, such as play video games or get through some of the movies on my 'Must Watch' list. I would think my parents were so lame for going to sleep early on a Friday night, especially since they also had a list of things they wanted to do that they were too busy to do during the week.
As I transitioned from teenager to adult, I truly learned the merits of a good night's sleep. There's no shame in going to bed early on a Friday night, especially if it meant I could wake up earlier on a Saturday morning, and therefore still have time to do all the things I couldn't do during the week.
I even learned that none of those things are as important or even as enjoyable as sleeping during the especially exhausting weeks.
Redditors have learned this exact lesson, through the actual activities or items are different.
Curious about what adult Redditors love now that they thought were lame as a teenager, Redditor wheretostream asked:
"What was lame as a teenager, but dope as an adult?"
"One can never have enough socks."
"Receiving socks for Christmas. Staying inside. Actually sitting down and relaxing."
"Quality socks are the best"
"So much this. I love socks. My mother and me both say if I can't wear it or eat it, I don't want it, at Christmas."
Home Is Where The Heart Is
"Staying in on Friday nights"
"Not gonna lie I’m a lifelong fan of staying home on Friday nights. although I did very much enjoy hanging out at night after school"
"Sitting home all weekend!"
"Wearing your backpack on both shoulders."
"…And tightening the straps appropriately."
"I Eats Me Spinach"
"Eating healthy. Few pieces of broccoli and I feel like a superhero nowadays."
"Spinach and onion pizza FTW."
Catching Some Zzzzs
"Going to bed before 10pm."
"You stay up until 10???"
"Relatedly, taking naps."
I Really Can't Stay
"Parties end at 9-10pm and you don’t get pressured into staying later if you tell the host or your friends “I have to get up early for work”"
"Next-level: leaving with no explanation. Just saying “I have to go”."
"Hanging out with your parents"
"This was my answer. When I was a teenager, I’d do anything to avoid hanging out with my parents. Twenty years later, I’d do anything to have the chance to spend a day with them again."
Spick And Span
"Cleaning. I hated it as a teenager mostly because it needed to be to my parent's standards. Now that I'm an aduly with my own space I get to clean and organize however I want and it turns out I don't enjoy living in a messy area"
Money Not Spent
"Living within a budget and not spending money on unnecessary stuff because it's cool. Buying stuff that's not name brand but just as good."
Take The Leap
"Trying something different. As a teenager, it’s cringe to try anything. As an adult, it’s very empowering to surprise yourself by trying new stuff."
YES TO ALL OF THIS!
Being an adult doesn't mean we have to give up our impulsivity or our "go go go" attitude. It just means we can slow down when we need to and learn to appreciate the small things we used to see as uncool.
It makes life just a little sweeter.
Sexy is different for everyone.
It's like ice cream - everyone has a favorite flavor with favorite toppings...or at least that's what you think until you meet someone who just doesn't like ice cream.
For ice cream lovers, though, is there a flavor you just can't fathom being into?
OK, let's drop the euphemism.
Reddit User toadspool asked:
"What’s extremely difficult to make sexy?"
... so let's talk funky flavors.
Catching More Than Feelings
"Welp, unless you're into that. There's a 'steamy romance' novel out there called 'Kissing The Corona Virus' lmao"
"Ever heard of bug chasers?"
"Currently in bed with Covid, unclothed because of fever. My husband is so conflicted. He really wants to, but at the same time reeeeeally doesn't."
That's A Hard One To DigestSeason 2 Chris GIF by Parks and RecreationGiphy
"Having stomach flu"
"My grandparents went to different high schools and met at a sports function. Grandpa didn't have a car. The first time he visited her at her house, his friends drove him and just waited outside."
"Grandma had a stomach bug. She said she knew he liked her because he had every excuse to leave but stayed quite a while to talk, even when his friends occasionally blared the horn to get him to leave."
"Idk about 'sexy' but most people feel a deeper connection when they have to take care of someone during a time of sickness."
"Especially when you have stuff coming out of both ends, so you lie in the bathtub while the combined force of v*miting and sh*tting propels you like a beyblade."
"That mold in your bathroom grout."
"hello darkness my old friend"
"Oh those spores just make me so wet"
"1part baking soda, 1part dish soap"
"Mix about 30 times and scrub with an old tooth brush and voila! You now have a sexy bathroom grout"
"Yo I have had this in my house for like a year and I always mop it away with hot ass water but it always creeps back months later. How do you get rid of that lol"
"You know that thing at the Chinese restaurant where you take the chopsticks and you stick them under your top lip on each side of your mouth so it looks like walrus tusks and then you clap your hands and make walrus sounds? It's really hard to do that and make it sexy."
"On the contrary, this is very sexy to walruses."
"Talk dirty to me..."
"Arf Arf Arf!"
Elmo ShamedTonight Show Television GIFGiphy
"As a parent, wanting to get it on but having to push all the toddler toys and stuffies off the bed"
"Yeah whenever Tickle Me Elmo is laying nearby and gets activated by my thrusts and starts laughing it really destroys my self esteem, the little punk."
"Elmo slutshames you."
"The name 'Bob.' Like, what do i do with that?"
"Bob is short for Robert so you just go by Roberto instead and now you got that sexy Spanish sounding name."
"Que Linda Belcher 'Oh Bobby, Oh Bobby!' "
"Both of my grandfathers went by "Bob" and now I have disturbing scenarios in my head. Thanks for that!"
No Love Lost
"A loveless relationship"
" 'Loveless relationship' referring to married or live in couples that have fallen out of love, yet stick with their convenient living situation anyway. Not 'loveless relationship' like sexy random hookups."
"With that definition, it sounds pretty terrible."
"Been there, not sexy at all. It's a form of hell, really."
"When the time is right, there's no sexy way for a man to take off his socks."
"The best way is to hide it, by taking each one off with its respective pant leg."
"Second best is peel most of the way and flick into the laundry pile, but if you miss, it reminds your wife of all the times you just leave your clothes where they drop, and it ruins her mood, and you're probably gonna have a honey-do list in the morning, and very few wives have ever put 'me' on the honey-do list."
"And then there's the granola boys in their sandals... Lucky bastards."
Comic Fans Are All Over This Onetom hardy bane GIFGiphy
"A cpap machine"
"Lol my fiancée refers to mine as my bane mask. I think she found her own way to see it as sexy."
"It’s like f*cking Darth Vader. Star Wars nerds are all over that."
"Egocentric and narcissistic people."
"But of course, every person feels different about this. The more other people like to get laid by egocentric and narcissist humans, the less I have to deal with it."
"People like this are like catnip to an old friend of mine, though."
"Dude, at least one-third of anime/manga fandom are down bad for the worst characters lmao"
"the only true answer to this question"
Okay well ... we've learned today that maybe there really is someone for everyone ...
So, uh, narcissistic men named Bob who struggle to take their socks off and think the chopstick walrus thing is awesome, I guess this one was for you?
We liken too many things to "actual" torture.
We're spoiled and entitled and most of us couldn't handle real torture.
But we are who we are.
So let's discuss all the things that give us massive discomfort.
One Redditorwanted to discuss the things that cause us stress and a touch of ouch.They asked:
"What isn’t torture but feels like it is?"
Torture is everywhere. I hate mosquitoes. They were created by the devil.
DeafeningOver It Reaction GIFGiphy
"Faking interest in a conversation you want no part of."
"Trying to have a conversation and the other person giving you nothing."
"AOL dial-up.. the image downloads from the top one line of pixels at a time, you'd get to see the head and shoulders of a naked women, then have to wait 20 minutes to see the boobs because it keeps disconnecting."
"Reading this while laying in a tent in the middle of Yosemite Valley. Lol gets me right in the feels."
"When you prepare for a sneeze but it won't come out."
"And you try everything, even tickle your snout, When you feel the urge, you know it's all about. Stuck in your no-hoose Lights will guide you home. The sneeze it shakes all your bones. And I will say 'bless you' Guitar solo.'
"I actually found a solution to this for myself, if I press a specific spot on my nose the sneeze comes out, very handy!"
"Having to sit through an interminably long PowerPoint presentation when the presenter is literally just reading off the slides. Email it to me if that’s all you’re going to do because I can read off slides too. Then seeing there’s still like 22 slides to go."
"And then they give you printed copies of the 23 slides, I per page."
Actual TortureFrustration No GIF by SpongeBob SquarePantsGiphy
"An endometrial biopsy. Legit torture."
"After mine my doctor said that some women liken it to labor pain. I just stared at her because I had no idea it would feel like the worst 30 seconds of my life."
This is why I hate doctors. No thank you.
Hire MeHappy Season 5 GIF by The OfficeGiphy
"I hate that this is the case. An interview done well should be trying to figure out if both parties are a good fit for each other. I've been lucky to be in good groups with smart managers, and the resulting organization is great because of it."
"Actually, artificially or intentionally inducing anxiety is indeed torture, and is one of the most prevalent types. The fact that some of us just exist in that space is freaking excruciating some days, and I wish more people understood that."
"Agreed, especially when it’s so debilitating to the point you’re literally trying not to pass out in social situations and have to pretend like you’re not dying."
"Having a swollen taste bud on your tongue."
"Oh my gosh, it is seriously insane how ridiculously painful it is for such a tiny bit of your body. That and when you have one of those horrible deep pimples develop right under your nose/on your lip."
"Oh god yes! I went through a period of ill health (thank you childcare germs) between Feb-March of this year, culminating in covid, and over the 2 months I had a couple of swollen taste buds at a time, a new one always appearing when another subsided. I was miserable."
"Being in a public place or event for an hour after your social energy runs out. Especially with small children at said event and your family expects you to help keep them entertained and all you want to do is go somewhere quiet on your own stuff away from everyone."
"My social anxiety mixed with my neurodivergent butt and Mexican genes results with me just silently staring at a centerpiece at my family's table, completely disassociated, shutting out the deafening music blasting on all the speakers at 2 AM."
I Love YouSad Tears GIF by SpongeBob SquarePantsGiphy
"Developing feelings for someone you're close to but it isn't mutual so you have to try to suppress those feelings while continuing to be friends with that person because you don't want to lose them from your life completely."
Life itself is torture. I'm now convinced.