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People Break Down Which Inherently Toxic Things Are Perceived As Normal

People Break Down Which Inherently Toxic Things Are Perceived As Normal
Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay

We should all be taught at a very young age when to spot and know when to eradicate toxic people and behaviors.

Seriously... who needs yet another useless semester of PE? This is a life lesson just as viable as Home Ec. Heck, it should be part of the Home Ec curriculum. Oh wait, do they still have Home Ec?

We've been gaslit to take abuse, it's engrained in our DNA and psyche. Somethings are not normal and it's imperative to know when to say no.

Redditoru/Tizerkanewanted to discuss the things and behaviors we've fooled ourselves into believing are proper in life by asking:

What's something inherently toxic that is perceived as normal?

Abuse from in all forms is a big no. And toxicity is oozing from every aspect of life. We have to start cleaning it out of our minds. I've started with taking inventory in friendships. It's about quality, not quantity.

Hard Labor

Stressed Paper GIF by Two Mortgage GuysGiphy


- NakedUnderTheSheets

"To add to this, the expectation that a hobby isn't worth having if you can't (or don't want to) monetize it."


Such an Intellect

"Asking a prospective employee to create a full on project or develop content specific to the position applied for. You might not get the job but the company has your intellectual property (and plenty are not above using it as their own)."

"Edit: Who knew? I just threw this out there because it happened to me. And I couldn't believe the balls out nerve of people asking me to create site-specific content to test my skills, which were well-documented by portfolio and easily verified. I guess I'm not the only one."

- janesanerd

Rest is Necessary

"Going to work/school even if you're super sick or in pain, not having days off, being expected to have perfect attendance in school or at work... etc etc."

- Child_of_Hylia

"My employer has a high turnover of staff. I'm considered an 'old timer' because I've been there two years and I'm actually employed by the company. They combat the high turnover with temp to perm agency staff. Impress the boss and you get employed."

"But the bar is set so ridiculously high for these guys they get dismissed and replaced on a weekly basis. One of the big reasons is guys calling in sick being dismissed because 'they're clearly time wasters. Humans get ill. We don't get sick pay where we work. If they're calling in sick they haven't made that decision lightly."

- arcadesteveuk


"I'm surprised nobody else has said sleep deprivation yet. Sleep deprivation literally causes brain damage to the part of the brain responsible for happiness and memory. There is a reason military regulation require soldiers be provided 8 hours of sleep. Because sleep deprivation is a form of torture."

- Over_Shock_2610

Shut Up!

Yelling College Basketball GIF by BIG EAST ConferenceGiphy

"Parents screaming at children during little league games."

- dustinhotsauce

Oof, so much awful can be traced back to our professional lives. A job, even a career is just that. A job or a career. You're not a slave to it. It's doesn't to own you. Why have we been taught to bow down to a boss? When we should be punching the boss.

Best Excuses For Late Assignments That Were Actually True | George Takei’s Oh Myyy

Say I Don't...

Read Modern Family GIF by PeacockTVGiphy

"Making fun of or denigrating one's spouse in social situations. It's a crappy thing to do."

- GoingApeCostume

Speak Truthfully

"Not saying what you mean."

- flyinsolonw

"I hate people that do this. Just say exactly what you mean please. Don't beat around the bush. Im not going to waste brain power trying to work out if you mean what you say or something else, and if it's something else I'm not going to bother working out what that is either."

- ignislupus

Too Sweet

"The amount of sugar in everything."

- wildslayer16

"Worse: the amount of "stuff that is supposed to replace sugar" in everything. High Fructose Corn syrup, Partially hydrogenated something or other, imitation saccharine, etc. etc. Some of that stuff is even way worse than sugar."

- FaliedSalve

"time and a half"

"In my industry (manufacturing), mandatory overtime. Pre-covid, it was totally normal for people to have to work 50+ hours a week, sometimes 7 days a week for months at a time. The whole point of "time and a half" was to discourage companies from making people work more than 40 hours regularly. And yet, for most of 2018 and 2019, people like my father in law had to use PTO to be off on a Saturday or Sunday."

- smp501

Run Fast

Joanne The Scammer Running GIF by Super DeluxeGiphy

"I feel like a lot of "Never turn your back on family" rhetoric is used by abusive people that think they shouldn't face consequences for their bullcrap."

- cyainanotherlifebro

The Hustle...

"Toxic "Hustle Culture": the idea that every moment you're awake, you need to be constantly achieving your goals and getting further in life. Please don't get me wrong: the idea that creating a side hustle, passion project or business on your own is fantastic and should never been discouraged."

"What I'm referring to is this attitude that ANY time not spent furthering your goals is a complete waste. Reading a book? Better make sure it's about an applicable skill for the future. Got two hours to spare? By the stars you better make sure to use them learning coding or a new language."

"It makes me cross because it's a fundamentally dangerous attitude that is advertised to younger folk, especially to those just entering their first jobs out of school or university. Burnout is a real issue that can cause exhaustion and isn't healthy. What really gets my goat is how it's an attitude permeated by companies. It's the whole "there's always someone hungrier than you, better do more to prove yourself."

"To quote Bill Watterson: "as if a job title and salary are the sole measure of someone's worth". It's an easy attitude to push: you keep the new workforce with a mind to work harder than each other to get more, which only discourages them from banding together for fundamental rights like healthcare or PTO. So if you took the time to read this, read a book YOU want, play a game or watch a series that YOU fancy. Not every moment has to be preparing for a never ending future."

- CapsuleJ7

I'm Sick

"I don't know about other places but in the US, Internships that delegate actual business responsibilities to interns but don't pay them. If your intern calling in sick would disrupt your workflow they're not an intern they're an employee and they deserve a wage."


A Gamble

"Loot boxes and all forms of in-app, in-game purchases that are just dressed up gambling. Introducing minors to gambling with real money for the chance of unlocking that awesome character is pretty sick. Let's trigger gambling addiction in minors because our game is free and its the only way we can make money!"

- SparkyMountain

Better off Enemies

Shocked Schitts Creek GIF by CBCGiphy

"Not having boundaries with family, particularly between parents and their adult children. I can't believe how frequently "...but they're family!" is used to rationalize and justify disrespect, manipulation, and various forms of abuse."

- prolific_poptart

"they love each other"

"Hating your partner/spouse. It's the dynamic of like 90% of on-screen relationships, that the couple have nothing in common and don't share interests and never do anything together without fighting constantly but "they love each other" so all the toxic, manipulative behavior gets played off for laughs or proof of how "strong" they are. Your partner should be your best friend. You should want to spend time with them. You should enjoy being around them. You should look forward to seeing them when you're apart."

- kirinspeaks

Under Pressure

"The inherent pressure to make your job into your life. I come from a south East Asian country where this is extremely normal especially in the more traditional toxic workplaces. Had a manager go on a rant about how us juniors were young and could afford to work hard, he then proceeded to compare us to other seniors who used to work until 12am everyday to learn the ins and outs of the business."

"Then saying that we should be like them and bragged about how he only used to sleep four hours a day back when he was starting out. My direct manager herself made me work at home despite being on sick leave and recovering from a nasty bout of fever. Just asked how I was feeling before diving straight into 'can you work from home now since you're not feeling too bad'."

- uwant_sumfu

Being Casual

"Casual peer pressure. I already said no twice to your offer of a drink, shut up. Ironically, my mom was deathly afraid of it when I was a teenager; some dealer would assuredly convince me to try bad bad drugs but now she's the worst offender."

- fasterthanpligth

"Are you me? My parents and older relatives made me terrified of peer pressure as a kid but now I can't be at any social function without them pretty much shoving alcohol in my hand. It's weird how persistent they are and how they act literally offended when I say no."

- piss-lemonade


Over It Drinking GIF by Saturday Night LiveGiphy

"Wine mom" culture. It's not cute, it's not quirky. "Mama needs a drink" isn't a personality trait."

- the_itz

Makes my skin crawl...

"This is just me, but my mom is manipulative. It's very subtle, but also very effective. She could easily be the nicest person on the planet, but instead chooses to use her incredible skill to get her way and be petty. I didn't notice it until recently and I've lived with her my entire life. Up until last year I didn't know why I couldn't stand to be around her."

- ZippyVonBoom

I Hate You

"Don't speak ill of the dead"

"Literally why? if someone was a bad person, then dying doesn't wipe off their sins."

- enumaelisz

Learn to run, and fast. When it doesn't feel right, trust it. Sometimes it's ok to not be ok or to be alone. Sometimes it's ok to not know every answer. The unknown is better than suffering because we're just used to it.

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People Reveal The Weirdest Thing About Themselves

Reddit user Isitjustmedownhere asked: 'Give an example; how weird are you really?'

Let's get one thing straight: no one is normal. We're all weird in our own ways, and that is actually normal.

Of course, that doesn't mean we don't all have that one strange trait or quirk that outweighs all the other weirdness we possess.

For me, it's the fact that I'm almost 30 years old, and I still have an imaginary friend. Her name is Sarah, she has red hair and green eyes, and I strongly believe that, since I lived in India when I created her and there were no actual people with red hair around, she was based on Daphne Blake from Scooby-Doo.

I also didn't know the name Sarah when I created her, so that came later. I know she's not really there, hence the term 'imaginary friend,' but she's kind of always been around. We all have conversations in our heads; mine are with Sarah. She keeps me on task and efficient.

My mom thinks I'm crazy that I still have an imaginary friend, and writing about her like this makes me think I may actually be crazy, but I don't mind. As I said, we're all weird, and we all have that one trait that outweighs all the other weirdness.

Redditors know this all too well and are eager to share their weird traits.

It all started when Redditor Isitjustmedownhere asked:

"Give an example; how weird are you really?"

Monsters Under My Bed

"My bed doesn't touch any wall."

"Edit: I guess i should clarify im not rich."

– Practical_Eye_3600

"Gosh the monsters can get you from any angle then."

– bikergirlr7

"At first I thought this was a flex on how big your bedroom is, but then I realized you're just a psycho 😁"

– zenOFiniquity8

Can You See Why?

"I bought one of those super-powerful fans to dry a basement carpet. Afterwards, I realized that it can point straight up and that it would be amazing to use on myself post-shower. Now I squeegee my body with my hands, step out of the shower and get blasted by a wide jet of room-temp air. I barely use my towel at all. Wife thinks I'm weird."

– KingBooRadley


"In 1990 when I was 8 years old and bored on a field trip, I saw a black Oldsmobile Cutlass driving down the street on a hot day to where you could see that mirage like distortion from the heat on the road. I took a “snapshot” by blinking my eyes and told myself “I wonder how long I can remember this image” ….well."

– AquamarineCheetah

"Even before smartphones, I always take "snapshots" by blinking my eyes hoping I'll remember every detail so I can draw it when I get home. Unfortunately, I may have taken so much snapshots that I can no longer remember every detail I want to draw."

"Makes me think my "memory is full.""

– Reasonable-Pirate902

Same, Same

"I have eaten the same lunch every day for the past 4 years and I'm not bored yet."

– OhhGoood

"How f**king big was this lunch when you started?"

– notmyrealnam3

Not Sure Who Was Weirder

"Had a line cook that worked for us for 6 months never said much. My sous chef once told him with no context, "Baw wit da baw daw bang daw bang diggy diggy." The guy smiled, left, and never came back."

– Frostygrunt


"I pace around my house for hours listening to music imagining that I have done all the things I simply lack the brain capacity to do, or in some really bizarre scenarios, I can really get immersed in these imaginations sometimes I don't know if this is some form of schizophrenia or what."

– RandomSharinganUser

"I do the same exact thing, sometimes for hours. When I was young it would be a ridiculous amount of time and many years later it’s sort of trickled off into almost nothing (almost). It’s weird but I just thought it’s how my brain processes sh*t."

– Kolkeia

If Only

"Even as an adult I still think that if you are in a car that goes over a cliff; and right as you are about to hit the ground if you jump up you can avoid the damage and will land safely. I know I'm wrong. You shut up. I'm not crying."

– ShotCompetition2593

Pet Food

"As a kid I would snack on my dog's Milkbones."

– drummerskillit

"Haha, I have a clear memory of myself doing this as well. I was around 3 y/o. Needless to say no one was supervising me."

– Isitjustmedownhere

"When I was younger, one of my responsibilities was to feed the pet fish every day. Instead, I would hide under the futon in the spare bedroom and eat the fish food."

– -GateKeep-

My Favorite Subject

"I'm autistic and have always had a thing for insects. My neurotypical best friend and I used to hang out at this local bar to talk to girls, back in the late 90s. One time he claimed that my tendency to circle conversations back to insects was hurting my game. The next time we went to that bar (with a few other friends), he turned and said sternly "No talking about bugs. Or space, or statistics or other bullsh*t but mainly no bugs." I felt like he was losing his mind over nothing."

"It was summer, the bar had its windows open. Our group hit it off with a group of young ladies, We were all chatting and having a good time. I was talking to one of these girls, my buddy was behind her facing away from me talking to a few other people."

"A cloudless sulphur flies in and lands on little thing that holds coasters."

"Cue Jordan Peele sweating gif."

"The girl notices my tension, and asks if I am looking at the leaf. "Actually, that's a lepidoptera called..." I looked at the back of my friend's head, he wasn't looking, "I mean a butterfly..." I poked it and it spread its wings the girl says "oh that's a BUG?!" and I still remember my friend turning around slowly to look at me with chastisement. The ONE thing he told me not to do."

"I was 21, and was completely not aware that I already had a rep for being an oddball. It got worse from there."

– Phormicidae

*Teeth Chatter*

"I bite ice cream sometimes."


"That's how I am with popsicles. My wife shudders every single time."


Never Speak Of This

"I put ice in my milk."


"You should keep that kind of thing to yourself. Even when asked."

– We-R-Doomed

"There's some disturbing sh*t in this thread, but this one takes the cake."

– RatonaMuffin

More Than Super Hearing

"I can hear the television while it's on mute."

– Tira13e

"What does it say to you, child?"

– Mama_Skip


"I put mustard on my omelettes."

– Deleted User


– NotCrustOr-filling

Evened Up

"Whenever I say a word and feel like I used a half of my mouth more than the other half, I have to even it out by saying the word again using the other half of my mouth more. If I don't do it correctly, that can go on forever until I feel it's ok."

"I do it silently so I don't creep people out."

– LesPaltaX

"That sounds like a symptom of OCD (I have it myself). Some people with OCD feel like certain actions have to be balanced (like counting or making sure physical movements are even). You should find a therapist who specializes in OCD, because they can help you."

– MoonlightKayla

I totally have the same need for things to be balanced! Guess I'm weird and a little OCD!

Close up face of a woman in bed, staring into the camera
Photo by Jen Theodore

Experiencing death is a fascinating and frightening idea.

Who doesn't want to know what is waiting for us on the other side?

But so many of us want to know and then come back and live a little longer.

It would be so great to be sure there is something else.

But the whole dying part is not that great, so we'll have to rely on other people's accounts.

Redditor AlaskaStiletto wanted to hear from everyone who has returned to life, so they asked:

"Redditors who have 'died' and come back to life, what did you see?"


Happy Good Vibes GIF by Major League SoccerGiphy

"My dad's heart stopped when he had a heart attack and he had to be brought back to life. He kept the paper copy of the heart monitor which shows he flatlined. He said he felt an overwhelming sensation of peace, like nothing he had felt before."



"I had surgical complications in 2010 that caused a great deal of blood loss. As a result, I had extremely low blood pressure and could barely stay awake. I remember feeling like I was surrounded by loved ones who had passed. They were in a circle around me and I knew they were there to guide me onwards. I told them I was not ready to go because my kids needed me and I came back."

"My nurse later said she was afraid she’d find me dead every time she came into the room."

"It took months, and blood transfusions, but I recovered."


Take Me Back

"Overwhelming peace and happiness. A bright airy and floating feeling. I live a very stressful life. Imagine finding out the person you have had a crush on reveals they have the same feelings for you and then you win the lotto later that day - that was the feeling I had."

"I never feared death afterward and am relieved when I hear of people dying after suffering from an illness."



The Light Minnie GIF by (G)I-DLEGiphy

"I had a heart surgery with near-death experience, for me at least (well the possibility that those effects are caused by morphine is also there) I just saw black and nothing else but it was warm and I had such inner peace, its weird as I sometimes still think about it and wish this feeling of being so light and free again."


This is why I hate surgery.

You just never know.



"More of a near-death experience. I was electrocuted. I felt like I was in a deep hole looking straight up in the sky. My life flashed before me. Felt sad for my family, but I had a deep sense of peace."



"Nursing in the ICU, we’ve had people try to die on us many times during the years, some successfully. One guy stood out to me. His heart stopped. We called a code, are working on him, and suddenly he comes to. We hadn’t vented him yet, so he was able to talk, and he started screaming, 'Don’t let them take me, don’t let them take me, they are coming,' he was scared and yelling."

"Then he yelled a little more, as we tried to calm him down, he screamed, 'No, No,' and gestured towards the end of the bed, and died again. We didn’t get him back. It was seriously creepy. We called his son to tell him the news, and the son said basically, 'Good, he was an SOB.'”



"My sister died and said it was extremely peaceful. She said it was very loud like a train station and lots of talking and she was stuck in this area that was like a curtain with lots of beautiful colors (colors that you don’t see in real life according to her) a man told her 'He was sorry, but she had to go back as it wasn’t her time.'"


"I had a really similar experience except I was in an endless garden with flowers that were colors I had never seen before. It was quiet and peaceful and a woman in a dress looked at me, shook her head, and just said 'Not yet.' As I was coming back, it was extremely loud, like everyone in the world was trying to talk all at once. It was all very disorienting but it changed my perspective on life!"


The Fog

"I was in a gray fog with a girl who looked a lot like a young version of my grandmother (who was still alive) but dressed like a pioneer in the 1800s she didn't say anything but kept pulling me towards an opening in the wall. I kept refusing to go because I was so tired."

"I finally got tired of her nagging and went and that's when I came to. I had bled out during a c-section and my heart could not beat without blood. They had to deliver the baby and sew up the bleeders. refill me with blood before they could restart my heart so, like, at least 12 minutes gone."


Through the Walls

"My spouse was dead for a couple of minutes one miserable night. She maintains that she saw nothing, but only heard people talking about her like through a wall. The only thing she remembers for absolute certain was begging an ER nurse that she didn't want to die."

"She's quite alive and well today."


Well let's all be happy to be alive.

It seems to be all we have.

Man's waist line
Santhosh Vaithiyanathan/Unsplash

Trying to lose weight is a struggle understood by many people regardless of size.

The goal of reaching a healthy weight may seem unattainable, but with diet and exercise, it can pay off through persistence and discipline.

Seeing the pounds gradually drop off can also be a great motivator and incentivize people to stay the course.

Those who've achieved their respective weight goals shared their experiences when Redditor apprenti8455 asked:

"People who lost a lot of weight, what surprises you the most now?"

Redditors didn't see these coming.

Shiver Me Timbers

"I’m always cold now!"

– Telrom_1

"I had a coworker lose over 130 pounds five or six years ago. I’ve never seen him without a jacket on since."

– r7ndom

"140 lbs lost here starting just before COVID, I feel like that little old lady that's always cold, damn this top comment was on point lmao."

– mr_remy

Drawing Concern

"I lost 100 pounds over a year and a half but since I’m old(70’s) it seems few people comment on it because (I think) they think I’m wasting away from some terminal illness."

– dee-fondy

"Congrats on the weight loss! It’s honestly a real accomplishment 🙂"

"Working in oncology, I can never comment on someone’s weight loss unless I specifically know it was on purpose, regardless of their age. I think it kind of ruffles feathers at times, but like I don’t want to congratulate someone for having cancer or something. It’s a weird place to be in."

– LizardofDeath

Unleashing Insults

"I remember when I lost the first big chunk of weight (around 50 lbs) it was like it gave some people license to talk sh*t about the 'old' me. Old coworkers, friends, made a lot of not just negative, but harsh comments about what I used to look like. One person I met after the big loss saw a picture of me prior and said, 'Wow, we wouldn’t even be friends!'”

"It wasn’t extremely common, but I was a little alarmed by some of the attention. My weight has been up and down since then, but every time I gain a little it gets me a little down thinking about those things people said."

– alanamablamaspama

Not Everything Goes After Losing Weight

"The loose skin is a bit unexpected."

– KeltarCentauri

"I haven’t experienced it myself, but surgery to remove skin takes a long time to recover. Longer than bariatric surgery and usually isn’t covered by insurance unless you have both."

– KatMagic1977

"It definitely does take a long time to recover. My Dad dropped a little over 200 pounds a few years back and decided to go through with skin removal surgery to deal with the excess. His procedure was extensive, as in he had skin taken from just about every part of his body excluding his head, and he went through hell for weeks in recovery, and he was bedridden for a lot of it."

– Jaew96

These Redditors shared their pleasantly surprising experiences.


"I can buy clothes in any store I want."

– WaySavvyD

"When I lost weight I was dying to go find cute, smaller clothes and I really struggled. As someone who had always been restricted to one or two stores that catered to plus-sized clothing, a full mall of shops with items in my size was daunting. Too many options and not enough knowledge of brands that were good vs cheap. I usually went home pretty frustrated."

– ganache98012

No More Symptoms

"Lost about 80 pounds in the past year and a half, biggest thing that I’ve noticed that I haven’t seen mentioned on here yet is my acid reflux and heartburn are basically gone. I used to be popping tums every couple hours and now they just sit in the medicine cabinet collecting dust."

– colleennicole93

Expanding Capabilities

"I'm all for not judging people by their appearance and I recognise that there are unhealthy, unachievable beauty standards, but one thing that is undeniable is that I can just do stuff now. Just stamina and flexibility alone are worth it, appearance is tertiary at best."

– Ramblonius

People Change Their Tune

"How much nicer people are to you."

"My feet weren't 'wide' they were 'fat.'"

– LiZZygsu

"Have to agree. Lost 220 lbs, people make eye contact and hold open doors and stuff"

"And on the foot thing, I also lost a full shoe size numerically and also wear regular width now 😅"

– awholedamngarden

It's gonna take some getting used to.

Bones Everywhere

"Having bones. Collarbones, wrist bones, knee bones, hip bones, ribs. I have so many bones sticking out everywhere and it’s weird as hell."

– Princess-Pancake-97

"I noticed the shadow of my ribs the other day and it threw me, there’s a whole skeleton in here."

– bekastrange

Knee Pillow

"Right?! And they’re so … pointy! Now I get why people sleep with pillows between their legs - the knee bones laying on top of each other (side sleeper here) is weird and jarring."

– snic2030

"I lost only 40 pounds within the last year or so. I’m struggling to relate to most of these comments as I feel like I just 'slimmed down' rather than dropped a ton. But wow, the pillow between the knees at night. YES! I can relate to this. I think a lot of my weight was in my thighs. I never needed to do this up until recently."

– Strongbad23

More Mobility

"I’ve lost 100 lbs since 2020. It’s a collection of little things that surprise me. For at least 10 years I couldn’t put on socks, or tie my shoes. I couldn’t bend over and pick something up. I couldn’t climb a ladder to fix something. Simple things like that I can do now that fascinate me."

"Edit: Some additional little things are sitting in a chair with arms, sitting in a booth in a restaurant, being able to shop in a normal store AND not needing to buy the biggest size there, being able to easily wipe my butt, and looking down and being able to see my penis."

– dma1965

People making significant changes, whether for mental or physical health, can surely find a newfound perspective on life.

But they can also discover different issues they never saw coming.

That being said, overcoming any challenge in life is laudable, especially if it leads to gaining confidence and ditching insecurities.