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People Explain Which Things Their Parents Pressured Them To Do Growing Up

People Explain Which Things Their Parents Pressured Them To Do Growing Up
Photo by Markus Spiske on Unsplash

How many times have you heard your relatives ask you why you're wasting your time pursuing art when you could go out there to be a doctor or lawyer or something useful?

Sucks, doesn't it? You bet it does.

After Redditor Sky451 asked the online community, "What's something your parents constantly pressured you to do growing up?" people proved to be quick with their answers.


"Grade F"

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Get better grades, be better at sports, nothing is EVER good enough. We have a couple of levels of schools, I wasn't in the highest, but scored 100% in my exam: not the highest level though, so nobody cares about your 100%.
Became the best in a certain sport in my country: well you're not World Champion are you, this means nothing.
They messed me up big time, took over 10 years of counseling. Floor-is

"Champions"

"Became the best in a certain sport in my country: well you're not World Champion are you"

Sorry they did that to you. Being the best in your country at anything is an incredible accomplishment, so congrats that you were there at one point.

My parents taught me that there would always be somebody better than me (not in a negative sense), especially when it came to sports. This was really helpful growing up, as there was never pressure to be THE best. big_thiccie2_0

"Arouns 12"

Around 12.

My Dad made me pay him 5c every time I said the word UMM because I was using it too much and it made me sound dumb.

If at the end of the day I didn't say UMM once, he gave me $5.

Got me outta the habit in about 2 weeks - lasted my whole life. nomdeplume_alias

"Stay skinny!"

Stay skinny! My mom made me start drinking diet pop when I was 14 because I was about 90 lbs and "might get fat." She jedi mind messed me up for most of my adult life.

Edit: for those wondering I was 5'3" at 14 and topped out at 5'4" at 15. PuppyPavilion

"Hush Bro"

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Never raise my voice, even before fights I'll say mean crap in a polite voice. Ex: "hey bro, f*** you"

You read that quietly didn't you? IsmalCox

"useful"

When choosing my career, they prompted me to value money over passion. carmmee

In my country there is a huge rate of unemployment. My parents insisted in making me study something I didn't love but was "useful." At the end, I have been years in a job not related at all with my studies and thinking if studying what I liked could have changed all that... at least I would have tried. angryhippo29

"Knock. Knock. Who's There?"

Knocking before you go into a room. I learned the hard way. BUT THEY NEVER KNOCK AND YOU KNOW HOW MANY DAMN TIMES THEY HAVE WALKED IN!! LDT124

The worst is my dad will knock and walk in. Like what's the point of knocking if you're just gonna walk in anyways? HassanaliBhimji

"Career"

Career. You need good grades, you should go to university, you should aim for being a lawyer or a doctor, doesn't matter what makes you happy! As a women, you should be educated and have a big ass career, you owe that to us!

Well screw you, I can't work due to health issues and am a housewife now lol. Reddit

"Pretty Enough"

This still makes me cringe to this day. My mum thought I'd make a great model. Ok yes I was tall and thin, maybe 'pretty' enough but I was very shy and awkward. I was the teenager that wanted to hide at the back room in a crowd and hoped I wasn't noticed by anyone ever... and if you spoke to me I'd blush bright red, stutter and trip over anything I said.

Mum refused to listen or notice I had not even close the personality needed to model.. and she signed me up to modeling courses, photography classes etc. Pure torture and hell on earth. At the end of a 10 week course there would be a graduation night. OMG... catwalk modeling in swimwear and day wear and formal wear. Far out... I'm starting to hyperventilate now just thinking about it.

Spoiler alert. I didn't become a famous model (or any sort of model). Years later I did overcome my shyness and can now even run workshops and do public speaking but damn mum, she made my teen years hell... shudder.... I can still see her pulling out a new brochure or pamphlets for some new course she'd found that she was sure was 'the one' that would have some talent scout find me. To this day she'll pull out photo albums with pictures of me on stage.. 'look how gorgeous you were'.. and all I see is the terror in my eyes lol. CheeryCherryCheeky

"To the Left"

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Started out writing with my left hand, was forced to change that. Now I'm left handed but I can write only with my right hand. Messed me up in subtle ways I can't quite explain. loopmutant

"Play What?"

Go outside and play. JackThomsom

I'm an only child. What am I supposed to do out there by myself. RhythmicStaccato

Yeah I feel you. I'm an only child as well, there were no other kids living near me, the few friends that I had all lived a few miles away, my parents almost never let me invite one of them over and I wasn't allowed to go over to their place on my own. So there just wasn't a whole lot I could do outside. SmokeWineEveryday

"The Perfect Son"

My parents have always tried to make me their perfect son. As if they're trying to make me as they would of liked when they were my age. My dad forced my into crap like cricket and painting which I never liked and was never good at. When they gave up on tryna teach me they still constantly remind me me on how much I used to "like" doing it. I've always wanted to make some form of content say on YouTube or twitch but my parents have always told me that it's a waste of time that I'll never get anything out of but like ffs what happened to all that sh!t you were trying to make me like. How tf has that helped me and my life. Porge069

"Adulting"

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Grow up. liquidxavius

Good advice for anyone, but most often used as a weapon against others because they didn't do what YOU wanted them to do. Cats-Ate-My-Pizza

"thanks mom"

Play golf, Swim, everything that could potentially set me up for in the future. I just wanted to be the perfect daughter and I felt so lost trying to do things to make me happy and them happy. Fast forward about two years, and I found out that my boyfriend golfed, so I am currently back in the game, thanks mom. avamidori

"50+"

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You need to have your own life planned 50 years ahead. RybaYTC

I would genuinely love to know about one person who managed to plan their life and succeeded to stick to their plan! tomasves02

"AMEN"

My mom always tried to force me to go to church. I lost my faith when I was eight. I loved reading. I decided to read the Bible. I read a bunch of messed up things, and things contradicted each other A LOT.

I hated church, hated the fake people, hated everything about it.

She eventually stopped bringing me, when I'd point out in front of everyone the contradictions they were preaching. guitarfingers

"Back Up Dad"

Play sports:

Team sports specifically, and it was my dad doing the pressuring. I tried soccer, basketball, baseball, swimming, and even lacrosse. But then I got into karate and my dad had very little support for me in that but it helped me be a better person in all aspects.

It helped me be more outgoing and it taught me discipline and respect for others as well as how to defend myself.

While I was doing that I was learning guitar which my dad also did not show support until I started getting really good and playing in bands.

TL:DR my dad pushed me to play team sports but I chose music and karate instead without his support. frozeneskimo02

"Brotherly Mess"

Be more like my younger brother. My brother could keep his room clean, focus better in school, was a healthier weight, and wasn't as awkward around people. Here's the kicker, he's never lived on his own. He went from living at home to living with his girlfriend, now wife. He would be completely clueless if he had to take care of bills, groceries, and all that stuff alone. I also spent most of my life with my ADHD undiagnosed. It's been in the last 7ish years that I even found out I have ADHD. Despite all this, I still love my brother because none of it was his fault. He was just doing his thing like I was. LittleMissRawr78

"No Shame"

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STOP shaming the family, hide my sexuality, change it, be straight. GlobalFairyInc

"Don't Overdue"

Being overly prepared. It just left me carrying around all these random objects on trips for just in case this very of rare incident happened (it never did) and more seriously made me a very anxious person. arbio

SAME, it got to the point where i stopped going places so i didn't have to lug around useless crap. haydenantonino

"The pigskin"

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Playing football. Everyone wanted me to be this great football player because my dad was pretty good and played through college. I played even though I hated it until I was in the 7th grade... to make things worse for about 2 to 3 of those years my dad was one of my coaches and he worked me so hard, which added to the reasons I didn't want to play. ctw1271

"1 line of code at a time"

My father would constantly tell me to work in a world changing app "1 line of code at a time". it didn't make sense to me then, and even now i still don't understand it, I got into coding thanks to that constant push but even to this day I don't think you can program a cohesive app like that. HistoricalFun4

"Happy-Thank You"

It might not be that important, but my parents would hound me about saying BOTH "Happy Halloween" and "Thank you" after getting candy while trick or treating. If I didn't say one of them, they would constantly remind me for the next few houses. It was when I was old enough to understand, but young enough to get flustered in front of a stranger and forget what I was supposed to say. TYUIOP-AI-ASSISTANT

"I'm Out!"

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My parents force me to become a advocate for handling all law matters in court. InformationalCorner

"the search"

Searching for a job. Red_Distruction

Same here. My mom wanted me to work in any dead end apprentice job when I was a teenager (12-14 years) but I always refused. Didn't want to work a lot and lose my afternoons for almost no money. Current_Equal

"No Generic!"

Don't use cheap condoms. EhlersDanlosSucks

That is actually very good advice. boiyougongetcho

"Art is Broke"

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Get a job in literally anything except art. They supported art as a hobby, but my whole family has admitted that they think I'll be a starving artist. CleverCrepe

Here is a flow chart on making a living as an artist:
Do you draw fetish stuff on the internet?
No->Starving artist.
Yes->Grats on your sweet gig. ControlledSingular

"it's beautiful."

i'm a trans man, i was named after my great grandmother when i was born. i tried to come out to my parents as trans a couple times and they just acted like they didn't hear me but would then go out of their way to talk about my gender - ie., "what dress are you wearing to prom?" "you know, your name has been in the family for generations. it's beautiful." "your dad always wanted a baby girl, he was so happy when you were born" etc. etc. that last one was a big point of guilt and hesitation for me since i have 5 brothers and no sisters from my dad.

thing is, i really like my old name. it just didn't fit. they eventually listened to me when i took them to a therapy session with me and came out then. especially took me seriously when i started hormones. they're both a lot more open-minded and accepting now, but from 14-18 yrs old i just sort of assumed they were going to disown me. qbtic

"Ball Time"

Play baseball. I was always into basketball and football as a kid. My dad is kinda racist and said a white kid like me had a better chance in baseball. And that it was safer and I could play it longer. I was pretty stubborn so I hated baseball until I was about 17. FoghornLeghornnn

"the ivories"

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Piano classes. Took 7 years and I hated every day of music school. Also, to be a good Christian. Which was kind of useless in the end. Rudzis12

"Don't Cry"

Kind of to be a silent submissive wife with children. Whenever I showed emotion or got rightfully upset about something it was always "I'll give you something to cry about" or that I don't respect them. So depressed teenage years came and some lashing out as an adult because I bottled up all my emotions until it got too much and I realized I needed a lot of therapy. So almost three years of therapy, a loving and compassionate partner (soon to be husband) later I'm almost at a point where I no longer show bursts of emotions but try to explain why I'm upset or angry.

The kids part turned into "I can actually choose not to be a mom? That's amazing because I actually don't want them". Lifted a lot of weight of my chest and after a couple of persistent years (where are my graaaaaaandbaaaaabys) they don't ask anymore. penguinforscale

" It didn't work "

I used to be a super creative, ginormous book worm. My family encouraged it, and i loved the attention. The fantasy worlds I escaped to and burned through at lightning speed was nice, too. Then, i started my freshman year of high school. That ability to win the award for most AR points crashed, and my aunt asked where that'd gone. She tried making me get a book to bring it back... It didn't work. Honestly? It kinda hurt that i was expected to be the bookworm, even after I'd grown out of that phase. I still love fiction stories, don't get me wrong, I just read it on AO3 now. SaandGuardiaan

"being demi"

Be perfect. Get good grades. Don't say anything that will upset 1 person in the world or you're a disappointment. You can't be fat or nobody will love you (said to me when I was 9). Don't speak. Look perfect.

A big one: Don't lie about your stupid head. This was after I finally got the courage to tell my family about my sucidal thoughts and depression. Also, after I came out to my older sister as a demisexual. Reddit

"Athletics Again"

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Sports. I was not a naturally athletically gifted child, and team sports were the worst for me, but my parents insisted on signing me up for soccer, softball, volleyball, and basketball leagues for years. I still hate participating in any kind of sport to this day. alwaystimeforcoffee_

"Be Normal"

Be normal. I was her freak child who was always bad no matter what I did. I didn't behave how she liked, didn't like the right things, didn't dress right (she had me in hand me down male clothes, how could I look like a girl wearing them???). I was just never good enough no matter what I did. She hated my hair. She refused to let me have friends while at the same time telling me I was a freak and would never have any.

As an adult she still hated who I am. I'm too tall, too big. I don't dress right, don't look right, don't like the right things, I'm not the child she wanted. We haven't talked in a few years now. I'm a normal girl, a bit too tall but normal. I have friends, I met a sweet man who she would hate because he isn't white. I'm everything she hates, because she's jealous. She even told me she was. I've had to fight to get this life. Zanki

"Education"

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My mom always said that me and my younger brother had to graduate high school. Both my older sisters did so i guess she just wanted all of her children to graduate. It sounds reasonable enough right? But sadly my mom passed away when i was 13 so at that point i basically just stopped caring about school and pretty much everything else and i started drinking,smoking and i said forget it and dropped out during my sophomore year. My brother also dropped out during his sophomore year but not a day goes by that i don't regret not staying in school. I'm also sure that my poor mom would have been disappointed in both of us for not finishing. Stay in school kids. cappilla

"Decison Maker"

Have an idea of what i wanted to do with my life - in no way were they pressuring me to do a specific thing, and they were very clear that they were supportive of whatever i choose. They just wanted me to know what i wanted to do so I could work towards it; which as a very indecisive (but stressy) person just added extra internal pressure. StarshipCaptains

"Pennysaver"

To not spend money.

Parents constantly screamed at each other about minor stuff, like $5 on screwdrivers from Walmart despite being pretty damn wealthy.

Dad made over 200k annually, but I was too scared to ask for money to go on a 5th grade class field trip to six flags.

Ended up being the only one in class who didn't go.

Sat with a substitute teacher in class until I lied and said my mom was supposed to pick me up at 10. Walked home and lied saying that it was a half-day. YeOLDEdandy

"Jesus Who?"

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Go to church. I was a pretty self motivated kid who loved school so they didn't have to worry about me too much in general.

I'm a successful adult now, but an atheist. Sorry mom and dad! queennbee

"A family friend..."

A family friend of mine wasn't allowed to date as a teenager. If he showed interest in a girl his parents just teased him about it, or they told him that relationships distracted him from getting good grades.

As a result he then became quite hesitant in interacting with the opposite gender and unfortunately it shows now. He's now in his late 20s and whilst he has a very successful career, he still hasn't even kissed a girl and is still generally very awkward around women.

The moment he graduated university, his parents have been saying "When are you going to bring a nice girl home? We want grandkids!". They've been constantly hounding him about it. I have a feeling they are going to be massively disappointed, but at the same time I hope he proves me wrong.

thunderfart_99

"Fluid Now"

I'm not sure if it was intentional or not but they really emphasized gender roles and would make fun of me if I ever did something that went against my assigned sex. Jokes on them though, now I've realized I'm genderfluid and am being as masculine and feminine as I damn well please. Robinisnotaline

"Here on behalf..."

Here on behalf of Asians. The three magic words are: Doctor, lawyer or engineers.

Any other career is a failure.

yesikeneysikan

"You're so smart"

Because I like to write, they assumed that I always was capable of writing anything at any given time, and couldn't grasp that maybe I didn't always WANT to write, and maybe I was blocked sometimes. Creativity isn't just a switch you can flip on or off... at least in my experience.

I also constantly got the "You're so smart, you should aim higher and higher than where you currently are" spiel. Aka the "nothing is ever enough" spiel. Let me figure out what my own damn happy place is, thanks.

SnuSnuTrain

"Alcohol..."

Alcohol, as early as 13 I was doing shots with family and friends. I live in Wisconsin and am surrounded by alcoholism. Now I'm 34 years old with the liver of a 50 year old sailer. Cheers matey.

helperperson

"In a bit of a role reversal..."

In a bit of a role reversal, I've always been pressured by my mom to become a professor of arts or humanities and it drives me crazy. There's a lot of creative professionals on her side of the family so I've had a lot of experience with that sort of thing but it's never "clicked." I'm starting to get my sh!t together to apply to law school this fall and she's gotten super cagey talking about it.

shobgoblin

"Chores."

Chores. Like, an insane amount. I'm almost certain my dad only wanted kids in order to clean up his mess. After I got a job in high school they had me come home during my open school periods in order to get my chores done because I was no longer around after school to do them.

kay37892

"That sounds like a good thing..."

Be self sufficient/independent. This sounds like a good thing and it is, in moderation. But sometimes kids need some emotional or financial support. 10 year olds should not be made to feel guilty for having needs, like sympathy or socks.

JamesandtheGiantAss

"My mom wanted me..."

My mom wanted me to be a doctor. Followed closely by lawyer. I'm 28 and she is still trying to get me to be a lawyer.

TheRebuttoning

"To get..."

To get a blue collar factory job that I'd hate that would work me to death with 6 days of 12 hour shifts just because it would get me money. Like literally recommending I drop out if college to do that, even though I have 0 qualifications and am not interested in that field. They also tried to convince my partner to do the same even though he has a good paying job.

meerkatherine

"Now I'm double majoring..."

Make babies, give them grandchildren, find a husband, and become a stay at home mom that homeschooled her kids.

Now I'm double majoring in STEM courses, planning to attend graduate school for a masters, and was even encouraged by one of my professors to pursue a PhD.

fem_in_stem


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People Reveal The Weirdest Thing About Themselves

Reddit user Isitjustmedownhere asked: 'Give an example; how weird are you really?'

Let's get one thing straight: no one is normal. We're all weird in our own ways, and that is actually normal.

Of course, that doesn't mean we don't all have that one strange trait or quirk that outweighs all the other weirdness we possess.

For me, it's the fact that I'm almost 30 years old, and I still have an imaginary friend. Her name is Sarah, she has red hair and green eyes, and I strongly believe that, since I lived in India when I created her and there were no actual people with red hair around, she was based on Daphne Blake from Scooby-Doo.

I also didn't know the name Sarah when I created her, so that came later. I know she's not really there, hence the term 'imaginary friend,' but she's kind of always been around. We all have conversations in our heads; mine are with Sarah. She keeps me on task and efficient.

My mom thinks I'm crazy that I still have an imaginary friend, and writing about her like this makes me think I may actually be crazy, but I don't mind. As I said, we're all weird, and we all have that one trait that outweighs all the other weirdness.

Redditors know this all too well and are eager to share their weird traits.

It all started when Redditor Isitjustmedownhere asked:

"Give an example; how weird are you really?"

Monsters Under My Bed

"My bed doesn't touch any wall."

"Edit: I guess i should clarify im not rich."

– Practical_Eye_3600

"Gosh the monsters can get you from any angle then."

– bikergirlr7

"At first I thought this was a flex on how big your bedroom is, but then I realized you're just a psycho 😁"

– zenOFiniquity8

Can You See Why?

"I bought one of those super-powerful fans to dry a basement carpet. Afterwards, I realized that it can point straight up and that it would be amazing to use on myself post-shower. Now I squeegee my body with my hands, step out of the shower and get blasted by a wide jet of room-temp air. I barely use my towel at all. Wife thinks I'm weird."

– KingBooRadley

Remember

"In 1990 when I was 8 years old and bored on a field trip, I saw a black Oldsmobile Cutlass driving down the street on a hot day to where you could see that mirage like distortion from the heat on the road. I took a “snapshot” by blinking my eyes and told myself “I wonder how long I can remember this image” ….well."

– AquamarineCheetah

"Even before smartphones, I always take "snapshots" by blinking my eyes hoping I'll remember every detail so I can draw it when I get home. Unfortunately, I may have taken so much snapshots that I can no longer remember every detail I want to draw."

"Makes me think my "memory is full.""

– Reasonable-Pirate902

Same, Same

"I have eaten the same lunch every day for the past 4 years and I'm not bored yet."

– OhhGoood

"How f**king big was this lunch when you started?"

– notmyrealnam3

Not Sure Who Was Weirder

"Had a line cook that worked for us for 6 months never said much. My sous chef once told him with no context, "Baw wit da baw daw bang daw bang diggy diggy." The guy smiled, left, and never came back."

– Frostygrunt

Imagination

"I pace around my house for hours listening to music imagining that I have done all the things I simply lack the brain capacity to do, or in some really bizarre scenarios, I can really get immersed in these imaginations sometimes I don't know if this is some form of schizophrenia or what."

– RandomSharinganUser

"I do the same exact thing, sometimes for hours. When I was young it would be a ridiculous amount of time and many years later it’s sort of trickled off into almost nothing (almost). It’s weird but I just thought it’s how my brain processes sh*t."

– Kolkeia

If Only

"Even as an adult I still think that if you are in a car that goes over a cliff; and right as you are about to hit the ground if you jump up you can avoid the damage and will land safely. I know I'm wrong. You shut up. I'm not crying."

– ShotCompetition2593

Pet Food

"As a kid I would snack on my dog's Milkbones."

– drummerskillit

"Haha, I have a clear memory of myself doing this as well. I was around 3 y/o. Needless to say no one was supervising me."

– Isitjustmedownhere

"When I was younger, one of my responsibilities was to feed the pet fish every day. Instead, I would hide under the futon in the spare bedroom and eat the fish food."

– -GateKeep-

My Favorite Subject

"I'm autistic and have always had a thing for insects. My neurotypical best friend and I used to hang out at this local bar to talk to girls, back in the late 90s. One time he claimed that my tendency to circle conversations back to insects was hurting my game. The next time we went to that bar (with a few other friends), he turned and said sternly "No talking about bugs. Or space, or statistics or other bullsh*t but mainly no bugs." I felt like he was losing his mind over nothing."

"It was summer, the bar had its windows open. Our group hit it off with a group of young ladies, We were all chatting and having a good time. I was talking to one of these girls, my buddy was behind her facing away from me talking to a few other people."

"A cloudless sulphur flies in and lands on little thing that holds coasters."

"Cue Jordan Peele sweating gif."

"The girl notices my tension, and asks if I am looking at the leaf. "Actually, that's a lepidoptera called..." I looked at the back of my friend's head, he wasn't looking, "I mean a butterfly..." I poked it and it spread its wings the girl says "oh that's a BUG?!" and I still remember my friend turning around slowly to look at me with chastisement. The ONE thing he told me not to do."

"I was 21, and was completely not aware that I already had a rep for being an oddball. It got worse from there."

– Phormicidae

*Teeth Chatter*

"I bite ice cream sometimes."

RedditbOiiiiiiiiii

"That's how I am with popsicles. My wife shudders every single time."

monobarreller

Never Speak Of This

"I put ice in my milk."

– GTFOakaFOD

"You should keep that kind of thing to yourself. Even when asked."

– We-R-Doomed

"There's some disturbing sh*t in this thread, but this one takes the cake."

– RatonaMuffin

More Than Super Hearing

"I can hear the television while it's on mute."

– Tira13e

"What does it say to you, child?"

– Mama_Skip

Yikes!

"I put mustard on my omelettes."

– Deleted User

"Oh."

– NotCrustOr-filling

Evened Up

"Whenever I say a word and feel like I used a half of my mouth more than the other half, I have to even it out by saying the word again using the other half of my mouth more. If I don't do it correctly, that can go on forever until I feel it's ok."

"I do it silently so I don't creep people out."

– LesPaltaX

"That sounds like a symptom of OCD (I have it myself). Some people with OCD feel like certain actions have to be balanced (like counting or making sure physical movements are even). You should find a therapist who specializes in OCD, because they can help you."

– MoonlightKayla

I totally have the same need for things to be balanced! Guess I'm weird and a little OCD!

Close up face of a woman in bed, staring into the camera
Photo by Jen Theodore

Experiencing death is a fascinating and frightening idea.

Who doesn't want to know what is waiting for us on the other side?

But so many of us want to know and then come back and live a little longer.

It would be so great to be sure there is something else.

But the whole dying part is not that great, so we'll have to rely on other people's accounts.

Redditor AlaskaStiletto wanted to hear from everyone who has returned to life, so they asked:

"Redditors who have 'died' and come back to life, what did you see?"

Sensations

Happy Good Vibes GIF by Major League SoccerGiphy

"My dad's heart stopped when he had a heart attack and he had to be brought back to life. He kept the paper copy of the heart monitor which shows he flatlined. He said he felt an overwhelming sensation of peace, like nothing he had felt before."

PeachesnPain

Recovery

"I had surgical complications in 2010 that caused a great deal of blood loss. As a result, I had extremely low blood pressure and could barely stay awake. I remember feeling like I was surrounded by loved ones who had passed. They were in a circle around me and I knew they were there to guide me onwards. I told them I was not ready to go because my kids needed me and I came back."

"My nurse later said she was afraid she’d find me dead every time she came into the room."

"It took months, and blood transfusions, but I recovered."

good_golly99

Take Me Back

"Overwhelming peace and happiness. A bright airy and floating feeling. I live a very stressful life. Imagine finding out the person you have had a crush on reveals they have the same feelings for you and then you win the lotto later that day - that was the feeling I had."

"I never feared death afterward and am relieved when I hear of people dying after suffering from an illness."

rayrayrayray

Free

The Light Minnie GIF by (G)I-DLEGiphy

"I had a heart surgery with near-death experience, for me at least (well the possibility that those effects are caused by morphine is also there) I just saw black and nothing else but it was warm and I had such inner peace, its weird as I sometimes still think about it and wish this feeling of being so light and free again."

TooReDTooHigh

This is why I hate surgery.

You just never know.

Shocked

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"More of a near-death experience. I was electrocuted. I felt like I was in a deep hole looking straight up in the sky. My life flashed before me. Felt sad for my family, but I had a deep sense of peace."

Admirable_Buyer6528

The SOB

"Nursing in the ICU, we’ve had people try to die on us many times during the years, some successfully. One guy stood out to me. His heart stopped. We called a code, are working on him, and suddenly he comes to. We hadn’t vented him yet, so he was able to talk, and he started screaming, 'Don’t let them take me, don’t let them take me, they are coming,' he was scared and yelling."

"Then he yelled a little more, as we tried to calm him down, he screamed, 'No, No,' and gestured towards the end of the bed, and died again. We didn’t get him back. It was seriously creepy. We called his son to tell him the news, and the son said basically, 'Good, he was an SOB.'”

1-cupcake-at-a-time

Colors

"My sister died and said it was extremely peaceful. She said it was very loud like a train station and lots of talking and she was stuck in this area that was like a curtain with lots of beautiful colors (colors that you don’t see in real life according to her) a man told her 'He was sorry, but she had to go back as it wasn’t her time.'"

Hannah_LL7

"I had a really similar experience except I was in an endless garden with flowers that were colors I had never seen before. It was quiet and peaceful and a woman in a dress looked at me, shook her head, and just said 'Not yet.' As I was coming back, it was extremely loud, like everyone in the world was trying to talk all at once. It was all very disorienting but it changed my perspective on life!"

huntokarrr

The Fog

"I was in a gray fog with a girl who looked a lot like a young version of my grandmother (who was still alive) but dressed like a pioneer in the 1800s she didn't say anything but kept pulling me towards an opening in the wall. I kept refusing to go because I was so tired."

"I finally got tired of her nagging and went and that's when I came to. I had bled out during a c-section and my heart could not beat without blood. They had to deliver the baby and sew up the bleeders. refill me with blood before they could restart my heart so, like, at least 12 minutes gone."

Fluffy-Hotel-5184

Through the Walls

"My spouse was dead for a couple of minutes one miserable night. She maintains that she saw nothing, but only heard people talking about her like through a wall. The only thing she remembers for absolute certain was begging an ER nurse that she didn't want to die."

"She's quite alive and well today."

Hot-Refrigerator6583

Well let's all be happy to be alive.

It seems to be all we have.

Man's waist line
Santhosh Vaithiyanathan/Unsplash

Trying to lose weight is a struggle understood by many people regardless of size.

The goal of reaching a healthy weight may seem unattainable, but with diet and exercise, it can pay off through persistence and discipline.

Seeing the pounds gradually drop off can also be a great motivator and incentivize people to stay the course.

Those who've achieved their respective weight goals shared their experiences when Redditor apprenti8455 asked:

"People who lost a lot of weight, what surprises you the most now?"

Redditors didn't see these coming.

Shiver Me Timbers

"I’m always cold now!"

– Telrom_1

"I had a coworker lose over 130 pounds five or six years ago. I’ve never seen him without a jacket on since."

– r7ndom

"140 lbs lost here starting just before COVID, I feel like that little old lady that's always cold, damn this top comment was on point lmao."

– mr_remy

Drawing Concern

"I lost 100 pounds over a year and a half but since I’m old(70’s) it seems few people comment on it because (I think) they think I’m wasting away from some terminal illness."

– dee-fondy

"Congrats on the weight loss! It’s honestly a real accomplishment 🙂"

"Working in oncology, I can never comment on someone’s weight loss unless I specifically know it was on purpose, regardless of their age. I think it kind of ruffles feathers at times, but like I don’t want to congratulate someone for having cancer or something. It’s a weird place to be in."

– LizardofDeath

Unleashing Insults

"I remember when I lost the first big chunk of weight (around 50 lbs) it was like it gave some people license to talk sh*t about the 'old' me. Old coworkers, friends, made a lot of not just negative, but harsh comments about what I used to look like. One person I met after the big loss saw a picture of me prior and said, 'Wow, we wouldn’t even be friends!'”

"It wasn’t extremely common, but I was a little alarmed by some of the attention. My weight has been up and down since then, but every time I gain a little it gets me a little down thinking about those things people said."

– alanamablamaspama

Not Everything Goes After Losing Weight

"The loose skin is a bit unexpected."

– KeltarCentauri

"I haven’t experienced it myself, but surgery to remove skin takes a long time to recover. Longer than bariatric surgery and usually isn’t covered by insurance unless you have both."

– KatMagic1977

"It definitely does take a long time to recover. My Dad dropped a little over 200 pounds a few years back and decided to go through with skin removal surgery to deal with the excess. His procedure was extensive, as in he had skin taken from just about every part of his body excluding his head, and he went through hell for weeks in recovery, and he was bedridden for a lot of it."

– Jaew96

These Redditors shared their pleasantly surprising experiences.

Shopping

"I can buy clothes in any store I want."

– WaySavvyD

"When I lost weight I was dying to go find cute, smaller clothes and I really struggled. As someone who had always been restricted to one or two stores that catered to plus-sized clothing, a full mall of shops with items in my size was daunting. Too many options and not enough knowledge of brands that were good vs cheap. I usually went home pretty frustrated."

– ganache98012

No More Symptoms

"Lost about 80 pounds in the past year and a half, biggest thing that I’ve noticed that I haven’t seen mentioned on here yet is my acid reflux and heartburn are basically gone. I used to be popping tums every couple hours and now they just sit in the medicine cabinet collecting dust."

– colleennicole93

Expanding Capabilities

"I'm all for not judging people by their appearance and I recognise that there are unhealthy, unachievable beauty standards, but one thing that is undeniable is that I can just do stuff now. Just stamina and flexibility alone are worth it, appearance is tertiary at best."

– Ramblonius

People Change Their Tune

"How much nicer people are to you."

"My feet weren't 'wide' they were 'fat.'"

– LiZZygsu

"Have to agree. Lost 220 lbs, people make eye contact and hold open doors and stuff"

"And on the foot thing, I also lost a full shoe size numerically and also wear regular width now 😅"

– awholedamngarden

It's gonna take some getting used to.

Bones Everywhere

"Having bones. Collarbones, wrist bones, knee bones, hip bones, ribs. I have so many bones sticking out everywhere and it’s weird as hell."

– Princess-Pancake-97

"I noticed the shadow of my ribs the other day and it threw me, there’s a whole skeleton in here."

– bekastrange

Knee Pillow

"Right?! And they’re so … pointy! Now I get why people sleep with pillows between their legs - the knee bones laying on top of each other (side sleeper here) is weird and jarring."

– snic2030

"I lost only 40 pounds within the last year or so. I’m struggling to relate to most of these comments as I feel like I just 'slimmed down' rather than dropped a ton. But wow, the pillow between the knees at night. YES! I can relate to this. I think a lot of my weight was in my thighs. I never needed to do this up until recently."

– Strongbad23

More Mobility

"I’ve lost 100 lbs since 2020. It’s a collection of little things that surprise me. For at least 10 years I couldn’t put on socks, or tie my shoes. I couldn’t bend over and pick something up. I couldn’t climb a ladder to fix something. Simple things like that I can do now that fascinate me."

"Edit: Some additional little things are sitting in a chair with arms, sitting in a booth in a restaurant, being able to shop in a normal store AND not needing to buy the biggest size there, being able to easily wipe my butt, and looking down and being able to see my penis."

– dma1965

People making significant changes, whether for mental or physical health, can surely find a newfound perspective on life.

But they can also discover different issues they never saw coming.

That being said, overcoming any challenge in life is laudable, especially if it leads to gaining confidence and ditching insecurities.