We all have our preferences when it comes to the type of people we want to keep the company of.
When the people we're with do something undesirable or rude, they are an instant turn-off, and we lose all interest in continuing to hang out with that person.
I know for me that people who try to be funny by making rude jokes about others won't be in my life for long.
Redditors were all too eager to share their own opinions on what they think are instant turns-offs.
It all started when Redditor SnooRegrets8194 asked:
"What is an instant turn off for you?"
Clean Yourself Up!
"Poor hygiene."
– QuakerMoatsTFT
"Bad teeth as well"
"Edit: mouth hygiene."
– Dexios
Get Me A Mirror...Or A Filter!
"Being completely obsessed with physical image. Especially via social media."
– TheFastestHighwayman
"Idiot duck lips has entered the convo"
– Evening_Dress5743
Do Unto Others...
"Rudeness. Especially when the person is rude to people they think are beneath them."
– Honest_Art_3266
"Bruh. If I’m with someone and they harass a service worker. I get heated."
– MuppetsMadeMeMurder
Only Looking For One Thing
"Worst is you thought that person was nice and then after a few exchange of messages, here comes a subtle conversation about sex. Very disappointing."
– jentlemonster
"I hate when that happens. LET'S TALK ABOUT SEX NOW."
– MuppetsMadeMeMurder
Just Be Nice
"Making fun of your interests or hobbies"
– Illustrious-Swan-257
"Yes. If I can’t talk to you about the sh*t I’m passionate about, we ain’t working."
– MuppetsMadeMeMurder
Screen Time
"When she gets on her phone while we have a good time"
– Alexeleven_
"Dude my ex did this constantly. Every date we went in she'd be on her phone talking to her friends. I normally wouldn't have cared because friends are dope, but the texting got a fair bit. Well.. suspicious after I saw the way they spoke with her."
– ShortAndSad4381
The Past Is In The Past
"When they complain about their ex on the first date"
– poisonbuzz
Why Do Today...
"When men in relationships don’t do housework."
– tatonka645
"Lazyness in general is a turn off for me."
– Winterfukk
Table Manners Matter
"Anyone who chews with their mouth open."
– justfnbroken
"Hearing or seeing this makes me so angry I have to walk into the other room otherwise I literally get violent thoughts about the person and I’m not a violent individual lol I HAAAATE ppl who do this!"
– Cubaris_murina
Oh The Horror!
"Dated a girl once who was upset I read Harry Potter because it involves witchcraft. That’s a turn off. Actually still makes me mad thinking of it considering it wasn’t just a small argument. Glad that’s over."
– 3gnome
"Freaking muggles."
– PrivateVenue
You're Good, But I'm Better!
"One-uppers/people who don’t have a disconnect from talking about their wealth, job, or how much they make constantly."
– Redmondroses
"You There?"
"Someone that's overly into themselves. Their selfie as their screen saver. Constantly sending you selfies and talking about how attractive they are. Confidence is nice, but sometimes it comes off as self-obsessed.
Also someone that demands so much of my time when I barely know them. "Why aren't you answering??" Or sending message after message when I'm busy. Like damn, you don't got nothing to do but text me huh? I don't have time for that shit."
– apimpnamedlofty"
"11:01: We can go to the mall tonight yes?"
"11:03: OK FINE I GUESS YOU DONT WANT TO GO WITH ME!! I AM NOT YOUR REBOUND!!!!"
"11:30 I get out of my meeting and read the messages like whaaaaaaaat?"
– Both_Lifeguard_556
I See That
"Power outage"
– Swimming_Skin_5705
"I know an electrician that always turns me on… i’ll dm you his number"
– SnooRegrets8194
Time To Convert
"I hit it off with a girl I met online, super sweet, but hardcore catholic, wanted me to swap from pagan to catholic just to be with her. I never really cared about someone’s religion tbh."
– Roostersnuggets
It's All About Me
"people asking questions that they use to turn attention/ the conversation back to themselves"
– Eli_is_okay-ish
Yeah, that would be a turn-off for me too!
Eccentric people tend to give the impression they are always outgoing and don't have a problem being the center of attention.
But that's not always the case.
People have complex personalities that can't always be categorized strictly within either of the binary classifications of introvert or extrovert.
Sometimes, those who are perceived as eccentrics might actually prefer their solitude but adapt to varying social situations like myself–though my friends may never be cognizant of it.
Curious to hear from strangers online about this concept, Redditor PrimaryRun7955 asked:
"People who enjoy being alone, why?"
It's nothing personal.
Preferring Chill
"Honestly, I like peace and quiet. People talk too much."
– knighttimedragon
Introverts Rule
"Yep, most people are exhausting after a while. It's why my favourite people are all quiet introverts."
– hauteburrrito
Break From The Family
"I live in a family of 6. Any moment of being alone is the closest i can get to silence and peace. And chilling while watching a good series or reading my fav books."
– crazy_not_but_lazy
Some people like the luxury of not having anyone around influencing them.
I'm In Control
"Because I'm in control and can do whatever I like without being dominated by the ringleader."
– SeladorSmith
Party Of One
"Same. One time I went to a convention alone and it was such a great experience. I got to enjoy the panels I wanted and come and go at my leisure, rest when I wanted. I went with a group in the past and have one friend who dominates and makes wherever they want to go the priority. When I finally did get to decide on a panel, they complained the whole time."
"Going to events alone is superior."
– SluffyBound490
No More Accommodating
"Haven’t seen this one mentioned yet: Not compromising. Might come off as a bit direct or selfish but balancing the social needs or expectations of others constantly can be exhausting."
– kraljaca
It's Habit-Forming
"Unaccountable autonomy is addictive. Solitude is a luxury if you get used to it."
– tickle_mittens
It's Not That Selfish
"I have my own interests and stuff I want to do. Being around other people means you have to deal with them and do stuff together instead of just doing what I really want."– BigDumbGreenMong
It's about not no longer becoming exhausted.
Dropping The Act
"I get tired pretending I am paying attention when people talk."
– Otototototototoi
Self-Love
"Because I like myself."
– bread_makes_u_fatt
At the end of the day, I want to enjoy peace and quiet time and indulge in my own interests not shared by those closest to me.
I want to play my 80s music without being judged. I want to read without distractions. I want to watch my shows without running commentary.
But trust, I also have my itch for other human interaction to share laughs, ideas, and inspiration.
I'm not exclusively an introvert, nor an extrovert.
But I find that finding the right balance keeps me sane, and when I get asked if why I'm such a homebody sometimes, I tell them it's nothing personal.
Everyone has their own interests, and it's fulfilling and fun to find other people who enjoy the same things, too.
But sometimes when we don't like an activity or TV show that is super popular, it can be especially validating to find someone who doesn't "get it" just as much as we don't.
Redditor Callum_BTW asked:
"What is something you simply can't understand why people enjoy?"
Enough Said.
"Child beauty pageant events."
- SuvenPan
Reality TV
"TV shows like 'The Bachelor,' 'The Bachelorette,' or all reality shows."
- herefortheparteee
In Need of Volume Control
"Videos of people being obnoxiously loud in a pathetic attempt at being funny. Loud is not funny."
- Ivymorrigan666
Pranking Videos
"Videos of YouTubers annoying, harassing, or terrorizing random people."
"To me, pranks are supposed to have a tongue-in-cheek element to them where both people leave with mirth about what happened."
"I don’t understand the mindset of enjoying a situation that just left the victims stressed out and upset. It just makes the world worse, and more often than not the guys making these videos just seem like bullies to me."
"The comments are already 90% pointing out the fact that people are not your props and that if something happens to the YouTuber, they have it coming."
"But people still tune in. Go f**king figure."
- Ebvardh-Boss
Cave Diving
"So much claustrophobia plus a limited oxygen tank. F**k that."
- Yak-500
It's Not For Everyone
"Being pregnant. I’ve heard many women talk about how wonderful it is."
"I myself am not a fan of the experience at all. The amount of discomfort and pain I experience daily, along with the nausea, and how my entire lifestyle has had to be adjusted."
- maya_star444
Begrudging Self-Care
"Exercise. I'll do it for my health, but I never understood why people enjoy it (especially early in the morning, what the f**k) or the 'runner's high' phenomenon. It's a pain in the a** and it's never been fun."
- catching_highs
No Tea for Me, Thanks
"One word: Drama."
- theyusedthelamppost
TikTok Dances
"We've all seen the videos of people doing their dances for Tiktok in random places. Shopping malls, aisles in Costco, parking lots, on the beach, in the hotel lobby, etc."
"I do not understand who this content appeals to. Who is going online and then watching people, even their friends they know, do a random dance in a random place? What do you get from that content?"
"It isn't funny because they are being serious about the dance. It isn't creative, because it's a dance that they have memorized."
"What is the appeal? I really want to hear from somebody that watches this stuff. I mean, it clearly is one of the most popular things to do on that app. What are you doing?"
- rity5yender
Gory Movies
"I don't mind some gore when it's well done, but some things just have gore for the sake of gore and it's stupid."
- cjlutera
Second Opinions
"I can't understand why some people go to the doctor, get a diagnosis and a prescription, then decide the doctor is wrong and whine about it on Reddit. Get a proper second opinion!"
"And yes, they do seem as if they enjoy doing that."
- EspressoBooksCats
Bullying Tactics
"Bullying or being mean to others, especially unprovoked."
- NotConsistentCalc
Gossip
"Who cares what Shelia did. Or what Brad’s kids are doing. Mind your own business."
- DefinitelyNotADave
Celery
"Celery has a power of flavor that works when it's lost among much better tasting stuff, works best when you can't pick it out, but if it wasn't there you'd miss it, AKA most stocks."
"But celery on its own, f**k that s**t."
- CurvedStew
Different Dating Interests
"Casual sex. I hear a lot of stories from my coworkers, and everything about it sounds awkward and unfulfilling at best."
- MotivationalSpeaker
This discussion serves as a reminder how different all of our interests are, and even when something is really popular, there will always be someone out there who isn't a big fan of it.
Even in this supposedly progressive modern age, far too many men feel self-conscious about the natural act of crying.
Feeling that it's not a manly thing to do, even though many would argue that it takes a real man not to be afraid to tear up publicly.
Of course, even the most unabashedly masculine men don't have complete control over their emotions and find their eyes watering unexpectedly every now and then.
Sometimes giving in to grief, sometimes overcome with joy, and sometimes simply owing to a corny commercial for coffee.
Sometimes this happens when nobody's around. Other men aren't so lucky.
"Men of Reddit, when did you last cry and why?"
Genuine Fear For Their Family
"Crying in my car right now."
"My wife has cancer."
"It scares me to death."
"I have to be brave at home."
"My car has become my place to escape to cry and release my fear and sorrow."- shmozzfinish
"At the hospital with my 2-year-old daughter."
"She just had a seizure in the waiting room."
"I felt so lost and useless."
"But it cut the wait time down to seconds!"- garsk05
Grief
"Few weeks ago."
"Friend died."
"Cried myself to sleep for a few nights."- PizzaPoopF**k
Funerals
"3 years ago."
"In my fathers funeral."- JOVA1982
Pets Passing
"January 4th."
"On January 1st, I got a message from my dad that the family dog had a stroke and passed away in the front yard."
"During the time before I stood at his grave just before I left to head back to my home, I just didn’t cry. I was questioning why I wasn’t."
"Then, standing at his grave, just a rush of emotions came in and just sobbed my heart out, then got in the car with my girlfriend and had to drive home."
"His name was Snitchel, and he was a good 14-year-old pupper."
"I’m 21, so he was a part of my life for about 70% of it."
"Was hard to say goodbye, especially because I wasn’t able to see him on Christmas because I got Covid, and I didn’t get to see him open his Christmas gifts like he usually does, during Christmas and in general during his final days."- ASexyCow0090
Spousal Loss
"My wife died."- Pitbull60usa
It's Been So Long, They Wish It Would Happen.
"I don't remember."
"I feel so sad and lonely sometimes but I still can't cry."
"I wish I could cry like a kid again."- spootex
Too Much All At Once
"About 2 yeats ago, was dealing with a lot of work an personal sh*t."
"Was at my limit of sh*t I can handle."
"I get a phone call that a childhood friend that I've known since we were 4 died in a car accident."- Mechanic_Me_Harder
"A few days ago."
"Broke down due to stress over everyday things."- einarn
Caught By Surprise
"Last night, just thinking about my mum."- TheH1dden1
Songs
"Last night, I heard 'Follow You To Virgie' by Tyler Childers for the first time, and memories of my mom hit me like a freight train."
"She’s been gone for 28 years now but when you least expect it the waterworks can come out of nowhere."
"Felt good if I’m honest."- GhostRN
Along With Many Others, No Doubt
"The Last of Us episode 3."- brucek951
A Broken Heart
"Tonight."
"My best friend told me that I don't make her happy, and that she doesn't want me in her life anymore."
"I'm in love with her."- helenemayer
Unbridled Joy
"Last night sent my girlfriend the basic Good night message."
"She replied back with 'I love you'."
"Sat there and started crying over the fact that she is the most important person in my life and that I'm so lucky that this woman loves me."- raskoe47
Post Traumatic Stress
"Two weeks ago."
"When it really hit me how much I let my managers abuse me."
"I quit a few days later and I start my new job on the 27th."- Karnezar
While Peter Allen may have encouraged us not to "cry out loud," to "keep it inside" and "learn how to hide [our] feelings," sometimes letting out a good cry proves to be just the therapy we need.
For what it's worth when Liza Minelli (coincidentally or not, Allen's ex-wife) covered the song, she altered it to exactly the opposite message.
When in doubt, go with Liza.
Just about everyone has made a sizable effort to make themselves appear smart.
Be it to impress a potential boss, a prospective client, a first date, or the parents of your significant other, people often will use big words, make bizarre references that only a select few would understand, or simply nod along and laugh even though they haven't the foggiest idea what's going on.
Surprisingly, people also pretend to be less intelligent than they are almost just as frequently.
What's more, people usually tend to "play dumb" for the same reasons they try to appear smarter than they actually are, as a way to impress or climb up a social ladder.
Of course, people also play dumb for many other, sometimes bizarre reasons.
"Have you ever pretended to be stupid or not as smart as you are? Why?"
Coming Off As Over Qualified
"It was quite common practice in my home country to hide the fact you have a masters degree to get certain jobs."
"Because either you were 'overqualified' and they couldn't afford you or they instantly knew you will only be temporary asset until you find something matching your education."- Reddit
Conflict Resolution And Ego Massaging
"Has helped me out of sticky spots."
"And people seem to like it when they feel superior to me."- NecessaryImmediate93
Language Barriers
"I live in Germany and I speak C2-level fluent German, until one of those people on the street try to start handing me a bible or some charity pamphlet then i'm all like 'I no deutsch verstehe' lmao."- Zack1018
"I pretended to be less fluent in a language than I am before, if that counts."
"Anyone who’s lived in Japan is familiar with the NHK man, who comes to your door and pesters you to pay the NHK fee."
"NHK is the national public TV station, and everyone who owns a device capable of receiving it is supposed to pay a monthly fee to fund it, but there’s no penalty for not paying, and quite a lot of people just don’t."
"The representatives can be veeeeery pushy though."
"Well, I didn’t even own a TV, but when I first started living here I somehow got pressured into signing up to pay the fee."
"Though after that I just ignored the bills until eventually they sent an angry one saying you’d better pay or legal action blah blah."
"So I called them and used my best foreigner voice to explain I didn’t understand what I signed up for and the lady was very nice and said, 'Of course, you couldn’t have known, I’ll cancel that for you'.”
"Problem solved!"- lygerzero0zero
Oh, To Be The Ringmaster...
"When you realize your family is a Circus, you tend to be the clown."- B-Town-MusicMan
Know Your Audience...
"In all aspects of life I've found reading (and playing to) the room is the best way to get by."- gosog28052·
As Long As You Don't Mind Never Being Promoted...
"It comes with benefits at work."
"Meaning less work."- doofusdoomed
Saves A Lot Of Trouble
"All the time because I don’t feel like arguing."- goodfaceman
"Yes, because I don’t always feel like arguing. Many people are closed minded."
"They won’t even entertain a new to them idea."- Errol-Flynns-Ghost
"Yes, because i think its a waste of time to argue with people who are very narrow-minded."- Separate-Trash2375
The Element of Surprise
"Yes."
"People like to feel more clever than others."
"It can also come in handy to be underrated."- Aluanne
Keeps The Peace
"All the time, it makes people more comfortable."- khamelean
"Often."
"Especially when dealing with police, or other authority figures."
"Also in general life so as not to alienate people."- captain_jeremiah
Wanting People To Like You
"The line is just too thin between being smart and seeming a know-it-all."
"The others will feel belittled."- kapaj55687
It's understandable that people feel inclined to play dumb to avoid conflict, or perhaps make others feel better about themselves.
Though it's important to remember that everyone should be proud of who they are, and no one should play dumb in hopes of making someone else like them.
Such people probably aren't worth having as friends.