Come on, old folks. It's time to do the thing where we give teenagers advice that they will probably forget until it's too late.
It's not because they're trying to be flippant and forgetful. It's just a brain thing, ya know?
One Reddit user asked:
What are some things that a teenager should avoid?
and undeveloped brains were actually one of the reasons that came up when talking about why some of this should be avoided. Like one person said, we're not all "squares" we've just been there and dealt with the consequences.
That was possibly the squarest thing I've ever typed, and I fully stand by it.
Life Already Started
Addiction, debt and pregnancy are the big ones. But avoid waiting for life to begin. It already has. Go in some positive direction even if you're not sure it's the exact right one.
One easy way to start this is to do one thing that's new, or makes you feel uncomfortable each day.
Even if that's walking into a store and saying "hi'' to the cashier before they say it to you. Or go out in a shirt that you wouldn't normally do.
Or post something anonymously on Reddit about how YOU are starting to write a cyberpunk book, even if it's only for you and no one else will ever read it.
One small step each day. Never skip the day, always take that one tiny, almost immeasurable step. Because in a month, you'll be able to look back and see that you've actually made a ton of progress.
The Dentist
ryan reynolds dentist GIFGiphyAvoid skipping the dentist. Even if money is tight professional cleanings and preventive maintenance will pay dividends later in life.
A horror story to prove the point: I caught a bad bad spell of depression some years ago and stopped taking care of myself in many ways, including flossing and going to the dentist.
I ended up having to have surgery to hollow up and fill out a completely rotten tooth, costing insane amounts of money. I was in so much pain. To make matters worse, there was a SURPRISE NERVE in one of the roots of my teeth meaning they nearly drilled while the area wasn't completely anesthetized.
I've brushed my teeth religiously since, but sometimes we still find surprise holes from that time where I couldn't take care of myself for a few months. TAKE CARE OF YOUR TEETH!
30F here and I've got two fake teeth on a partial denture from neglecting my teeth and not going to the dentist in my late teens early 20s. Biggest regret in my life 100%
Don't Wait To Figure It Out
Procrastination. Not as big as the other ones but my God, procrastination can get so bad and affect you so horribly if you let it get out of hand.
Yes. Teenagers need to hack themselves and figure out their own personal formula for productivity. Pays off bigtime.
Yes. Nip this one in the bud now. It is so much harder to develop a work ethic as an adult.
Approval Online
Social media and seeking others approval. That sh*t will destroy them for years.
Cyber bullying can leave a huge emotional impact on teens that give them mental health issues or body image issues. I know people that have taken into their thirties to recover from these kinds of things.
This terrifies me about my two kids. I was bullied as a kid in elementary and then high school. I had the ability to go home and forget about all of them and escape by playing video games.
F*ck me, kids these days don't get an escape.
YES. I'm 28. I've had to get off of all social media aside from Reddit because of this.
My life took a drastic turn a couple of years ago. I've struggled since but have managed to find a small apartment for myself and my daughter. My boyfriend moved in right before covid hit and it's cramped.
Watching friends my age or younger close on their homes, go on vacations, lose weight, get married, etc. has done a number on my mental health. I compare myself constantly and it's driven me to completely hate myself.
Shutting out a lot of social media has helped a little because I'm not constantly shoving these things into my psyche, but there's a lot of things I have to undo mentally in order to be comfortable with myself.
I remind my 17 year old sister all the time that it's awful. Coincidentally, she is actually doing a paper on it right now and has "interviewed" me in order to have a real life source.
Thank goodness she isn't that big on it. It really is like mental poison.
No Drugs ... Yet
Drugs. absolutely Drugs. Teenage brains aren't developed enough to handle that kind of dopamine
I'm pro-weed, pro-psychedelics, pro-legalize everything; and yet I still want the recreational age for all of that to be 21.
Brains need to fully developed before you start soaking em in fun juice.
As someone who did harder drugs as a teen this one would be at the top for me.
It permanently f*cked me up, body, mind and all. It's been 8 year since I quit and I've actually continued to decline even more since I stopped.
We're not being squares. A lot of us have been there and done that already. I wish I'd listened.
Hearing Loss Sucks
Deaf GIF by memecandyGiphyReally loud music, I mean the kind at a concert front row loud. Tinnitus really sucks.
And not only tinnitus. I damaged my ability to hear certain frequencies when I was a teenager by going to loud punk gigs. It makes it really hard to hear people speaking over background noise. Doesn't sound too major, but it makes socializing in a pub or club or public place that bit more challenging. I guess I lost the frequency range that distinguishes speech from general noise.
When you're a young adult, you do a lot of your socializing in such environments, so don't add an extra challenge to your social life.
Don't Fall For The Fakes
Fake friends. It's honestly better to have no friends than people who gossip about you and make snide remarks to you. I know everyone says this but you will find your people.
I agree with you... but to a teenager, no friends is infinitely worse than bad friends. Sitting alone in the cafeteria or in the hall?
Transferring from one group to another is hard.... but that's the key.
As someone who put up with being the butt of my "friend"-group's jokes for years... I can say that cutting out the toxic people in my life has helped me out tremendously.
Keeping a small group of high quality friends, is so much less stressful.
Work and hobbies will help you find like minded people in my experience.
- WindJDM
You're Probably Pretty Average
Avoid self destructive attitudes is a good one.
Probably 95% of people alive are decently attractive. You can lose that extra 15 pounds, you can shave those unwanted hairs.
If you look in the mirror and think you are below average.. you are probably closer to average.. which is fine! Average people are perfectly good looking enough.
If you look in the mirror and think you are absolutely hideous.. maybe you are slightly below average.. but truly ugly people are rare and more often then not they have 13 out of 10 charisma and it makes up for it.
You're Fine.
Time Gives You Time To Discover
My mom found her dream job in her thirties and my current stepdad in her fifties.
Don't be too concerned with whether the things you're doing now is gonna be forever. Do what you can to open doors for yourself, but don't feel forced to think you need to know who or what you should spend the rest of your life with at this point.
Time gives you time to discover more things. Discover more things, and eventually you'll find your way - even if you didn't realize it. Stop thinking in today and forever. You got all the time to figure it out. Just get yourself a solid foundation and explore.
Except for drugs. Don't explore things that you could get addicted to for the rest of your life.
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Hatí
"Haití."
"At least not until some form of functioning government actually takes place."
"After the magnicide it's been nothing but a turf war between gangs better armed to than most small countries and everybody that could, aka, the rich, left the country due to the constant threat of getting kidnapped and all the violence that has been taking place."- logiqaltech
Russia, at least for now.
"Americans might wanna put that Russia vacation on hold for a lil bit."- flip_phone_phil
Salem, Massachusetts, in the fall...
"Salem around Halloween."
"I'm a local."
"It's a damn tourist trap."
"Nowhere to park and if you haven't booked all your reservations by February you're SOL."
"The summer is a 10x better time to visit Salem."
"For those asking, I am referring to Salem Massachusetts."- jlm2299
Happy Trick Or Treat GIF by DOMCAKEGiphyThe pyramids might be best seen in pictures...
"As an Egyptian I am definitely not looking forward to reading these replies."- d7oom175
"Egypt."
"The common folk are warm and welcoming and would give you the food off their table and clothes off their backs."
"But the cops, the scammers, the vendors, phew."
"It is one big tourist trap."- TwistedChopstick
"If you’re a woman, I’ve been told that Egypt is best avoided unless you have male friends or family that can safely escort you about in public."
"Otherwise, any country in an active war."- chibinoi
Unless you never want to leave your hotel.
"I took my wife to Jamaica for our honeymoon."
"We wound up in a resort in Montego bay."
"The resort was nice but began to feel like a prison."
"If you went out people would grab her by the wrist and drag her to some shack they were selling trinkets in."
"The locals that worked in the resort were fantastic."
"Best prison guards you can imagine."- jabsaw2112
"Jamaica."
"They actively tell people to stay on resort property because they can't protect tourists otherwise."- MrPuzzleMan
Maybe one day.
"Afghanistan."
"No question about it."- DatRobloxKid
If you can't take the heat...
"Phoenix in July."
"It’s a monument to man’s arrogance."- TacoDoc
Raising Arizona Movie GIFGiphyOf course, when choosing a vacation spot, one wants somewhere where they can relax, take in the sights, and escape from their current realities for a week or so.
So, traveling to somewhere where you're constantly on alert, your mind is constantly racing, and/or there's nothing to see... might not be the best choice.
Thankfully, be it near or small, there is always somewhere to fall back on.
My favorite endings for my shows? The list is long. But The Golden Girls & Buffy are up there.
Goodbye
Cbs Cheers GIF by Paramount+Giphy"Cheers."
atahualpaFX
"Sorry, we’re closed."
livefast6221
"Ok. So the end itself was good but in the final episode they never once said NORM and it just hurts me a little when I think about it."
Maleficent_Ad_7617
Onward Story
"Avatar, The Last Airbender."
Frosty_Connection867
"Love how they continued the story in The Search and The Promise comics though. I know there are more Avatar comics but I haven’t gotten around to reading those yet. Plus it was recently announced that Avatar Studios’ first project would be an animated movie about Aang and the others as young adults. We’ll probably be seeing him and Zuko build Republic City."
Flat_Weird_5398
Genius
"The Good Place."
diphappy
"I came to say the exact same thing - I absolutely adored this show and and while I’m sad it’s over I’m also so glad they ended it when they did instead of letting it go on for too long and ruining the show."
acrossthestreetinthe
"I was told over and over to 'just watch the show for the ending.' From lots of people. So I hesitantly did so, and was like 'Yeah this is okay, but not mind blowing or anything. It's cool.'
"But holy s**t. That ending is the best ending to a TV show that's ever been made, I think.Everyone was 100% right. It was worth it. It's hard to explain without watching the show. But they did it flawlessly.I think about that show's ending all the time."
appleparkfive
A Few Issues
"Star Trek: The Next Generation."
TheriousMind101
"I liked where they left it with Picard's development - but me and my partner recoiled in horror seeing Q appear. By far our worst part of the series, such an OTT obnoxious character, with lazy storytelling. Loved the series as a whole, but to have Q end it seemed like a punch in the gut. He seemed like growing pains of the first season but just had to come back lol."
glennok
Life is Over
Six Feet Under Drinking GIF by HBOGiphy"Six Feet Under is yet to be topped."
DarthDregan
"It really was such a great and satisfying ending."
beard_lover
I can't even think about Six Feet Under without tears.
Fresh
Season 2 Dancing GIF by The Fresh Prince of Bel-AirGiphy"Fresh Prince of Bel Air. The way the cast said good bye to each other in the empty mansion to how Will turns out the lights at the end of the episode. Just an amazing series."
Musicgeek117
This War is Over
"M A S H."
Toes14
"Absolutely. As a young child in the beginning of the 1980s I distinctly recall hearing the theme melody late at night when the TV was airing reruns and sometimes catching a glimpse of the intro.That melancholic tune just touched me in ways I didn’t understand as a 4 yr old."
"When I got a bit older I was flipping through the channels and suddenly there it was: the theme melody that I had moved me when I was so little. I had stumbled upon one of the many reruns that would air for 20-40 yrs.I was a European kid growing up in the 80s and 90s."
"I didn’t know anything about the Korean War. But the show really showed the horrors, depravity and injustice of war no matter who is doing the fighting. And it did so in a way that mixed humor with tragedy without making light of the tragedy.It was brilliant.I must have seen all episodes by now. I have a terrible memory for books, movies and shows but the last episode will stay with me forever."
anewfaceinthecrowd
Too Soon
"The Sopranos. I know what I said."
DrOliverReeder
"I know what they were trying to do there and I agree that it is brilliant once you actually analyze what happened and what led up to it, but that takes hindsight and rewinding the episode and rewatching it once, maybe twice. But on the first, cold viewing, I think it was a teeny bit TOO clever and kind of toyed with the audience."
amerkanische_Frosch
Forget 9
"Scrubs. Before anyone says it, the '9th season”'(Scrubs: Med School) is 100% a spin-off. I don’t care that they tried to staple it to the original series, that was a stupid move to ride the ratings. It was entirely meant to be and written as a spin-off and you cannot convince me otherwise."
Dan*uckingSchneider
"I still get a lump in my throat when I see JD take that final walk down that hallway, seeing the faces of patients and other loved ones that passed on during his tenure, all of them wishing him well on the next step of his journey. When I retire I always imagine I'll do the same... seeing customers and co-workers I lost over the decades as I take that final walk to the front doors."
Jorro_Kreed
Phoebe
cheers champagne GIF by FleabagGiphy"Fleabag."
jubjubbirdsarefine
"Same same. I wished it could have gone on only because I enjoyed it so much, but the final season was beautiful and perfect and I cried so much during the final episode."
jubjubbirdsarefine
All great choices. I love you Fleabag.
I love to cry at movies. It makes me feel human.
Gone By...
Happy Shawshank Redemption GIFGiphy"The scene in Shawshank Redemption where the elderly man laments how quickly time passed."
mojichana
Dear Dad
"Big Fish."
BelicianPixieFry
"This movie for me too, my dad is also a tall tale teller and he passed away last year. At his funeral all of his different friends showed and retold some of his crazy stories but just slightly different. Made me realize that some of his stories were true and I was living in a real life big fish movie."
Unable_Mountain_5524
Never Again
"Fox and the hound when the hound can’t be the foxes friend anymore."
_manicpixie
"I can not watch that movie at ALL!!! Right after my mom died I went to her house. That movie was in the VCR. When I hit play the movie as at that song about letting go if you love something. I just LOST IT right there. To this day I will not watch that movie and prob never will."
tectuma
Oh the Tears...
"Bridge to Terabithia. The guilt of that kid for the rest of his life."
trieditdidntregretit
"First time I ever saw my Dad cry. He thought I'd be a great Father-Daughter movie night. I just rewatched it recently and it still makes me cry."
Professional_March54
"This book and Stand By Me both made a sizeable impression on me during my youth. I hope to share these experiences with children of my own one day."
Tough-Requirement736
The End
Disney Pixar GIF by Disney+Giphy"Coco, g*ddamn Coco. I was not expecting bawling my eyes out in the last 15 minutes."
SourFartsSniffer
I can't with some of these movies. My heart can't take it.
I Hate Bees
sad macaulay culkin GIFGiphy"My Girl."
slowgoing33
"'Where's his glasses? He can't see with his glasses! It's not fair he needs his glasses to see!!'"
Ricarfo-
Let's Play
"Field of Dreams, when he's playing catch with his dad. Also, the end of The Truman Show hit pretty hard."
YteKnight696
"I can't believe I had to scroll this far down to see this one. My dad died about 20 years ago, and I would give almost anything to have a catch with him again. When Ray says in that choked up voice 'hey dad, wanna have a catch?' I just lose it."
rockychunk
Every. Time.
"It’s dumb, but the first movie I ever cried for was ‘Click’ with Adam Sandler. That scene where his father dies and he wasn’t there because the use of autopilot, so decided to revisit the last time he had seen him. His dad tells him he loves him and the autopilot version of him doesn’t give a crap, but the real him starts to cry and play the words 'I love you son’' on repeat. THIS. Has me every time."
Waytootired4this
Hey Boss
"The Green Mile."
CurlSagan
"I cried so hard watching that movie that I can't bring myself to rewatch it. Once was enough."
cmc
"Brilliant and awesome story that was understandable for a 7 year old me to start ugly sobbing for an hour in my aunt's house lol. I think it was the first time I encountered feelings against injustice and the staggering helplessness that you can't do anything to stop what's happening."
"God, it still feels like yesterday and I'm nearing 30. But the ice cream and toys I got was good too. My auntie had to bring me to the mall because I was inconsolable and continued crying on the way there. I only stopped when I had to pick an ice cream flavor lol."
Queen_Merneith
It's Ugly
life is beautiful film GIFGiphy"Life Is Beautiful."
dashing-away
"Came here to say this title. I’ve seen it once, when I was in high school around the time it came out, and I still tear up thinking about certain scenes."
ErrantCrayon
Last Breaths
"Hachiko (old and modernised version). Both versions are just as sad. It’s based on a true story. For those who don’t know, it’s about a bond of a dog and an owner. The owner walked to the train station to go to work and always brought his dog with him and the dog would always wait for him at the train station until the owner returned. The owner then died while at work and the dog continued to wait for him at the train station every single day for 9 years until his last breath."
I love movies. They make my tears feel free.
I've been dying for insight into the animal that is a bro. They're human too...
Bruno Mars GIFRank
"Do not leave your home smelling musty."
EffectiveFlatworm952
"Also, tell your friends if their home, car, them etc... smells musty. there's a time and a place of course, but often we don't notice and the note to freshen up is very welcome."
gehbfuggju
You ok?
"Check on your bros. They won’t necessarily tell you when they need help."
DomingoLee
"Lost a friend via overdose. He was exhibiting unhealthy behavior for years. I saw it, and said nothing. I later relocated and made very little effort to keep in touch. Destroys me to think what might have been different, had I reached out."
Johnny_mundo
"Seriously though, having been the bro who's dealing with depression knowing you have bros to lean on really helps."
Einar_47
Stop Breathing...
"Was in a residency program with a guy who had the worst breath any of us (all other bros) had ever smelt. When I say bad, I mean it smelt worse than if he had eaten human poop. The guy was completely oblivious to it. He’d have girls break up with him and come to us and be like 'I don’t know what happened it was going so well,' stuff like that."
"And we’d all beat around the bush and never tell him that we knew exactly why those bro-ettes dumped him. I’m ashamed to admit, my Reddit bros, that he made it through an entire 3-year residency program without any bros stepping in and hitting him with the cold hard truth. RIP to that bro."
jirski
lift me up...
Animated GIFGiphy"Support your bros; don’t tear them down when they are trying to achieve something."
Ruffled_Snout
Men really should embrace feelings more.
Find More
The One Where Estelle Dies Episode 15 GIF by FriendsGiphy"Don't fall in love with potential."
CIoud__Strife
"This comment hurt me. Learned that lesson the hard way."
kerbouchard219
Extras
"Always buy more than one stick of deodorant at a time so you’ll have a spare around when you run out. Finding out that you’re at the end right before you have to be somewhere, preferably smelling acceptable, is the worst."
anonymousone89
"As soon as I open the last container of any toiletry, it goes on the shopping list to be purchased within a week. I haven't run out once since I started doing that, and I usually buy multipacks so I don't need to shop for those things often."
loungehead
Validation
"As a guy in his mid-50s, my number 1 advice is: When you're disagreeing with someone, no matter the relationship, always validate their point first, empathize with them second, and then, and only then, make your counter-argument. Never respond to an argument with a pushback before you've validated/empathized with them."
"If you're Machiavellian about life, you'll be more likely to get what you want from someone else if they feel respected by you. If you're not Machiavellian, it's just a nice thing to do."
stumark
The One...
"Have AT LEAST one friend you can have real conversations with about your feelings. Particularly if you're in your late teens or twenties you probably don't talk about that stuff with your mates but it makes the world of difference knowing you have someone to talk to about it, even if you don't have anything to tell them just yet."
FireyBrick
Top Gun Maverick Movie GIF by Top GunThanks Bros. This was all helpful.
Do you have other tips to share? Let us know in the comments below.