Therapy is sacred, and it's something we can all benefit from. So it's aggravating when people take advantage of the mental heath process. Those who can maneuver the system ruin it all. Some therapists must have some great stories about the people who have taken advantage.
Redditor.... Unknown wanted to hear from the mental health community by asking.... Therapists of reddit, what are have been the most manipulative things done by incredibly difficult patients?
Meth is a No!
Most recently, it's a tie between someone testing positive for meth because "she was walking barefoot and stepped on a needle that had to have had meth in it" and another testing positive for opiates because "she picked up an unknown pill in her home and it melted in her hand and that's why she was positive for opiates." Both of course denied using. stellarsphere
The Hearing.
Was a therapist in a short-term (two weeks at most) psych hospital. Had a very clean-cut man come in with a police hold pending a mental health court hearing. He was a dentist with a fairly well-known practice in the area and the police had brought him after a domestic dispute where he choked his wife. First clue we were dealing with a narcissist/manipulator?
He choked his wife because she found evidence of him cheating on her and asked him about it. By the end of his stay, he had managed to convince his psychiatrist to let him sign in as a voluntary patient, then asked to sign out against medical advice within hours of the doc letting him sign in with the guarantee that he'd not try to sign himself out. He also got one of the nurses on his side and he had to be taken off her case load because of how much she was doing for him.
I talked to the wife and it's honestly one of the only times I've ever gone against my patient's best interest and told her to start looking for options for herself to get away from the situation. What scared me the most was that he could turn on/off an emotion in a split second. One second he'd be sobbing then he'd stop the minute you asked him something else. mac9426
XYZ.....
Therapist here. I think the situations that stand out to me are parents of teens being a bit manipulative (the teens are my clients). They would lie about needing a letter about their child for one thing when really they wanted to use it to get their child out of some consequences/punishments at their school. Or parents emailing me to ask me to get Little Johnny to do XYZ (anything from eating more vegetables, go outside more, not be friends with so-and-so). Basically asking me to do the parenting.
I make it a policy to show teens any and all emails that their parents send me to avoid secrets (I tell parents about this policy on day one). I'm there to help the teen with their goals, not the parents' goals.
Most people lie about something in therapy. I take that as a sign that trust needs to be further established in our relationship, and I don't expect the whole truth right away.
I've had people try to push my buttons or corner me in hypothetical situations, "if you could choose between having dinner with me or Michael Jordan, you definitely wouldn't choose me!" Or, "Would you leave me alone in your office with your purse sitting out?" BaileyIsaGirlsName
Location X
Clinical director/couples therapist... making several comments in this thread. Been at it a while! In university I did volunteer counseling which occasionally involved house calls.
I saw a couple at their wealthy family's farm about 40 mins from my city. I would do two individual sessions followed by a couples session, for a total of about three hours. When the husband left the room so wife and I could do our individual stuff, he was doing cocaine. This next bit was a major crime so I'm going to change details for anonymity.
He gets high and tells wife he's at location X, and when she goes to meet him he kidnaps their twin daughters. A police chase ensues and there's a standoff. A court case comes of this and they considered flying me from my new location elsewhere back to the original place of practice to testify. Thankfully that was not the case. otiumisc
Training....
Trainee but I've been counseling for a while. I mostly work with kids and parents who've had trauma/abuse. I get a lot of kids who lie to hide the abuse or would lie to protect their parents. A lot of suicidal gestures or fake suicide attempts, The absolute worst one I had was a parent who lied telling us all their child was skipping sessions and school without their knowledge, turns out they were sending their child to a grown mans house in exchange for money. lozzamm
Through the lenses....
I'm a marriage and family therapist. I once had a client tell me he had cancer. Even faked walking with pain as he came in for a session after "half his colon was removed." I did some research and it turns out the whole thing was a lie. He mentioned doctors and diseases that didn't even exist. I continued to treat him through the lenses that he was after some sort of validation from me or the world. I did not confront him on the lies but allowed him to feel comfortable telling me what he was ready to tell me.
He never did reveal any dishonesty in the end, but he continued to come to the sessions, so I assume he was getting some benefit from it. Most of our sessions were centered around some childhood trauma, that also could have been a lie. I eventually had to terminate and refer him to another therapist because I moved. I wish him all the best in life still. west2hale
SUPERMAX....
Most of the time lies and manipulation are a preservation of the self they have created to protect whatever is broken down underneath.
That said, I worked in a supermax male prison a few years ago in the psych ward of segregated housing unit. These guys were in prison, in prison. The psych ward section was full of legit sick guys, and guys who wanted to get out the cell WAY more often than the normal SHU, talk to ladies (any lady will do when in prison, and a lot of therapist in prison are female), and have an easier jail time.
The dudes that were faking it were the epitome of manipulation, and would often times prey on the legit sick guys, and that pissed me off, so I came at them hard and documented EVERYTHING to get them out of my program. Pissed a lot of scary people off lol.
Edit: I give up on the ama. I'll try again tomorrow, I'm pregnant and tired and apparently suck at proof. Sorry guys.
Lair. Liar.
Chronic liar, but my therapist was an angel and would call me out super gently and wouldn't shame me for it-- which is exactly what I needed. Lying is so hard to stop doing because of the fear of people getting furious with you. She was SO kind and accepting even when 50% of the things that came out of my mouth were lies.
She also by coincidence was at an ice skating rink when I was there with friends while also recovering from social anxiety, and while she kept an appropriate distance and didn't engage, I saw her once smile when she saw me order some snacks by myself without help. That was so heartwarming. I wouldn't be half of who I am today without her. <3 ggravendust
Substance use counselor here, I work in a women's residential (inpatient) program. Most of our clients are court ordered and will do anything to get out of treatment, e.g., fake seizures, lie about illnesses, etc. but will also lie and manipulate to get contraband brought in or to deviate off site. Some of the lies are convincing, but I find most to be hilarious. stellarsphere
It's in the Behavior...
Dialectical behavioral therapist here. I predominately work with people with a diagnosis of BPD and unsurprisingly it seems as though borderline personality disorder is getting mentioned quite a lot in this thread. I find BPD is a pretty crappy label for what could rather be much more accurately described as having difficulty regulating emotions and tolerating distress with quite often a history of childhood trauma and or poor attachment.
It's just easier to label someone as having BPD, so easy that it tends to become synonymous with what is essentially perceived as having a clinical diagnosis of being a bad person. CyanideSeedbell
Dating and the search for love and companionship... What a nightmare.
This journey plays out nothing like in the movies.
Every Prince or Princess (or everything in BTW) seems to have a touch of the psycho.
The things people say during what should be simple dinner conversation can leave a dining partner aghast.
Like... do you hear you?
Redditor detroit_michigldan wanted to discuss all the best ways to crash and burn when trying to make a romantic connection. They asked:
"You're on a date and it's going really great. What can another person say to ruin it completely?"
I once had a guy ask me if I was willing to follow him into the woods, depending on the price of the meal.
Yeah. No steak is worth that.
Plans After...
"Thanks for the ride but I have a date with someone else, I figured you wouldn't drive me if you knew I was going on a date with someone else and I really needed a ride."
"Online dating, talked to her for a while, finally got the courage to ask her out and then she said that as we got there."
iareyours
Mirror Image
“'You look just like my wife!'”
catalinachild
"I did have a guy tell me I reminded him of his son. I don’t believe English has a word to adequately describe my feelings at that time."
UnicornMagicRainbow
"That would definitely do it."
chaotica78
Third Wheel
"'Hope you don't mind if my mother joins us.'"
ofsquire
"Actually had a girl do this on a first date because she had anxiety issues. Honestly wasn’t bad except that 90% of the time she was silent and her mom talked over her."
"I didn’t mind that much and wouldn’t have minded trying again when she was more comfortable except that she was let go at the company we worked at and she deleted her social media profiles and she never responded on her number. Ah well."
Seightx
Liar
"'Hey bro aren't you gay? I made out with you last night.'"
"Random dude I've never seen before in front of my (f) date."
JHXC16
Was he lying though?
Filter Issues
"'You looked better on Tinder.'"
waqasnaseem07
"Isn’t it basic knowledge that everybody looks slightly worse than the worst picture you can find?"
no_user_ID_found
The Past
"'My ex used to do that too.'"
xxIvyOF
"Yep. I’ve definitely had two otherwise-decent-guy date-situations sour because the ex-comparisons just would not stop flowing. No woman wants to be seen as interchangeable—I’m not here to perfectly fill that ex-sized hole in your life. Focusing on the present moment and a future we could build together is a courtesy we need to grant each other in earliest dates of dating."
LarkScarlett
Powerless
"'I'm an alpha, you cant handle my top energy.'"
Midnightgay28
"I actually left a dude in the middle of dinner, in part, for saying this. I ordered an Uber under the table while pretending to listen to him. Went to the bathroom, and never came back. That was when I was young. Now I’d just say, 'How about we enjoy this meal in silence, before we head our separate ways.'”
UnicornMagicRainbow
Mommy...
"'Mother says I should be back by 9.'"
"Saying 'mother says' just feels weird."
bunnyrut
"That gives me Norman Bates vibes."
Werewolf_lover20
"'Mother says alligators are aggressive because they have an overabundance of teeth, but lack a toothbrush.'"
sodaextraiceplease
Obvs...
"'If you were going to be murdered, what method would you prefer. Purely hypothetical. Obvs.'"
Specific_Tap7296
If it looks anything like a Dateline NBC episode... RUN!
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Despite the advancement of technology rendering people left to their own devices–literally–to entertain them, there are some leisurely activities that will never go out of style.
Or so you would think.
Do people still knit to pass the time? Are people actively collecting stamps?
It depends on who's asking.
Curious to hear about hobby trends, Redditor gizehgizeh asked:
"What are once popular hobbies that are slowly dying these days?"

Before we've become conditioned to living on our phones, these activities used to keep people occupied.
Before Texting, There Was This
"Letter writing."
– littlekingMT
Literal And Tangible Joy
"Well the internet killed pen pals for sure. I do remember I had a Japanese girl for a penpal maybe back in 2007 or so. I honestly don't remember how it started, pretty sure some website, but that was a fun experience. But now I can just straight up talk to foreign people real time, lol. But yea getting a physical letter that someone took the time to write and mail still is hard to beat feelings wise."
– skyburnsred
Model Trains
"When I was growing up, every town had a model train store in it. Now I have one in region and everything else has to be bought online."
– Hairy_Effective1172
Pretty Rocks
"Don’t see anyone playing marbles anymore, I had an awesome collection in school."
– sheeple85
"I had some marbles as a kid in the 90s. My grandma got them for me and I had no idea what I was supposed to do with them. I always imagined them as a thing kids in the 40s played with."
– Ryoukugan
People Were Moving Canvases
"Paintball has been dying a slow death since 2006. Sad, really."
– hobo_recycler
Before the general population began hating clutter, collecting was once a "thing."
Precious Coins
"Coin collecting... I'm a silver/gold nut and I'm always hunting for precious metal coins. whenever I go into a shop they get all excited because 'no one under 70 collects coins anymore.'"
– ThatFishySmell99
Post It
"Stamp collecting."
– spooky_scully_mulder
"Collecting in general, really. Of course there are still prominent collectors but it's slipped more into enthusiast and niche territory than being a popular hobby that you might expect anyone to have."
– iuytrefdgh436yujhe2
What A Gem
"Rockhounding was immensely popular back in the 1950's and 1960's. Personally, I think it's a fascinating and fulfilling hobby, but when I go to a meeting at a rock and gem club, I'm usually the youngest one in the room by several decades."
– filthy_lucre
People once enjoyed making things.
Admiring The View
"Stained glass. I learned how to make it from my old man, and my junior high art class teacher also taught it. Very few artisans are still around."
– brobeanzhitler
Metal Vocation
"Black smithing."
– kenworth117
"I bought a forge to try. It’s insanely hard work, and crazy expensive. I still haven’t finished a piece."
– DSentvalue
Scrapbooking
"Yeah. I'm watching the arts and crafts stores around me completely uninstalling their racks for specialty paper. Now the only thing they have is mega packs of repeating colors/images. To boot all the inclusions like papercraft/die-cut things, washi tape, scissors, stickers, etc have gotten so expensive I would rather go buy $5 bags at value village to get an assortment of things versus buying anything new. I really, really miss yard sales for the same reasons."
– Phantasmai
I envy people who have jobs that are basically their hobbies.
Not everyone gets paid doing what they actually enjoy and have a profound level of passion for.
If they do, kudos to them.
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When we first meet someone–whether through mutual friends, at school, or in a new work setting–we generally feel people out to determine if they're worth getting to know.
While the process could take time, some people make our jobs much easier after spotting instant red flags.
Curious to hear about our general radar of people, Redditor xxFluffie asked:
"What is something that makes you immediately dislike someone?"

Some people just think they are absolutely hilarious and never realize they're the only ones laughing.
Next In Line
"They laugh about having screwed someone else over. If you think you're not next, well, you'll learn."
– whiznat
Unfunny
"when you mention you don't like a thing and they immediately do that thing 'as a joke.'"
– wayfinder
Playing Devil's Advocate
"Kneejerk contrarians. People who, no matter what you say you like or believe, just have to dismiss it and say they like or think the opposite."
– BubbhaJebus
People who put others down get slammed here.
Bad Parents
"When they treat their kids sh**ty in public. I don't mean handling tantrums, setting a rule, having to hurry to the train etc. I mean perfectly normal-behaved kids getting in trouble for trailing along peacefully, looking at things, asking questions etc."
"If you don't like tiny humans who learn the world, why have them??"
– raxeira-etterath
Public Humiliation
"Treating people sh**ty in public for laughs. Like being rude to service workers because they think it’s funny. Big red flag."
– Ok_Personality_1080
Simply Uncalled For
"Someone who is a d*ck to other people or animals for no reason."
– xebt1000
Those with ulterior motives rubs people the wrong way.
The Scheme
"If they try to get me to join their MLM scheme."
– spazmcgee1
Hard Sell
"A guy I used to be friends with in high school reached out a couple of years after graduating about a business opportunity he wanted my opinion on because 'you've always been smart', then he set up a Skype call and brought some other dude into the call and they started trying to sell me on what was clearly an MLM scheme. The guy went from friend to 'I'm never talking to you again' in a matter of 10 minutes."
– Mental-Afternoon-164
A Timeline
"Good gawd, this! I've had more than one exposure to this abject bullsh**tery..."
- Back in the late 80's/early 90's I was invited to a meeting of literally the OG "Pyramid" where you're recruited to pay in, and then you go out and recruit others to pay in, and the last in line got f'kall.
- In 1995 I had a coworker try to reel me into Amway, which was a hard no.
- In 2000 it was Pampered Chef, though to be fair they did have useful products.
- In 2009 a coworker tried to get me into some stupid video calling service that was obviously stupid from the description. He even got offended when I called bullsh*t.
– Mystical_Cat
Too much ego is a no-go.
I Can Do Better
"Being a b*tch just to stroke their own ego."
"We get it, you can lift 5lbs more than the 12 year old, you don't have to rub it in their face just because you're slightly better"
– Livia_Pivia
Can't Top This
"Oh, you did <story that's been told>? That's nothing! I did <implausible story>.
"I get the whole empathy through relating common experience, and I'm someone who does that (which drives some people crazy on its own), but there's a big different by empathising through common experience, and one-upmanship."
– Tisarwat
Lacking Conversational Etiquette
"Starting to talk over me when I was already talking."
"Stop it you rude, arrogant jerk."
– R33Gtst
If one or more of these traits sound familiar to you, you're not alone.
We don't have time for braggadocios, pyramid-schemers, and conversation interrupters.
And that's just for starters.
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Children tend to believe just about anything they hear.
That there are monsters under your bed, watching too much TV will make your head explode, and silly faces will be permanent if you make them too often.
The sky is truly the limit when it comes to silly things that children will believe.
Some call it naivitée, other's youthful innocence.
But it's hard not to look back with embarrassment on certain things we believed as a child, that today might simply seem dumb.
Redditor Disastrous_Toe_6548 was curious to learn the multitude of silly things people believed when they were children, leading them to ask:
"What's the dumbest thing you believed as a kid?"
Pleading to deaf ears...
"My dad told me he had hearing loss and couldn't hear me if I whined because my pitch would get too high."
"Would completely ignore me until I asked him questions in a normal voice."
"Trusted him implicitly until I was 12 and he yelled at my younger brother for whining."- Tyrion_Stark.
Get it while you can.
"That they took everything off the shelves when the supermarket closed."- fgyfddg.
Silly superstitions.
"My grandfather used to tell me that if I played with the fire, I'd pee the bed."
"I believed him for a while, until I got older."
"I think he was just trying to protect me from the fire."- teddypa1981.
"Rain, rain go away..."
"That if it was raining where I was, it was raining everywhere in the world."- morningshartz.
Age is just a number.
"My parents used to seem really old to me, so much so I believed they grew up like cave people as children, wearing giant leaves for clothes and what not."- Laleena_.
So that's how they're made!
"That smokestacks from the power plant created clouds."- Scaniarix.
An instant cure.
"The sun gives you sunburns, therefore, moonlight should heal them."- velocipeter.
Better safe than sorry.
"Don't drink and drive meant all drinks."
"My dad was super confused when I told him he wasn't allowed to have any soda until we got home."- hulagirlslovetoparty.
Don't believe everything you see on TV.
"There was an episode of Mickey Mouse where Mickey couldn’t reach something at first, so he tried again and somehow his arm was long enough to reach it."
"As a small kid I believed that if I couldn’t reach something, I should just try reaching for it again and my arm would then somehow be long enough to reach it."- That-Dutch-Person.
The miracle of childbirth.
"That babies are pooped out."
"When I was like 7 I was listening to my aunt as she explained that childbirth was pretty intense and painful for her, and I was all solemnly like, 'yeah, sometimes just my poops are painful, I don’t think I could get a baby out' and she went 'um, WHAT?' and her reaction made me realize real quick that I had f*cked up somewhere and I tried to change the subject while my mind was just reeling lol."- thesoundingfurrows.
Oh to be a child again.
And to believe literally everything you're told.
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