In the very niche world of purposefully annoying your aging parents with asinine phone calls, I am undeniably the greatest to ever have done it.
I called my mom just to ask her dumb stuff four times in five minutes the other day.
Like, I'm amazing at this, y'all.
Reddit user Glade_Runner asked:
"What person alive today is undeniably and rightfully regarded as the greatest of all time in their field?"
Greatness happens all around you, fam.
Here are the names Reddit came up with:
Better Composers
"When Steven Spielberg approached John Williams to compose for Schindler's List, the latter saw a cut of the film and said 'there are better composers for this than me.' "
"Spielberg replied, 'I know, but they're all dead.' "
- AdvocateSaint
"John Williams has made some of the most iconic songs for movies that are still well known decades later. Most people know at least one song from Jurassic Park, Star Wars, Indiana Jones and Harry Potter."
- fermenttodothat
We Need A P.O.V.
Simone Biles Sport GIF by Team USAGiphy"Simone Biles."
"They didn't even know how to score the complexity of what she was doing."
"If you made her routines into a theme park ride everyone would f*cking puke and have no idea what is up, down, or where they even where."
- diegojones4
"Simone Biles wakes up everyday and says 'f*ck physics.' ”
- cleo-banana
"Oh man - now I want to see a demo where she has a Go-Pro on her so you see what she sees as she does her floor and vault."
"And yes, people would get motion sickness watching it. Might also give people a true understanding of 'the twisties' which sounds funny but definitely isn't."
- Best_Industry2203
The Best AND Second Best
"Ronnie O'Sullivan - snooker."
- 10110101101_
"For those not in the know, there was a period where the second-best snooker player in the world was also Ronnie o’Sullivan, but playing left-handed."
- pm_me_your_charlie
"This is the one where there isn't really an argument. Virtually every current and former professional snooker player believes O'Sullivan is the best there's ever been."
"He's widely spoken of as the benchmark against which all other players are judged."
"And yeah, as others have said, he was the world's best player with his right hand, and a top 4 player with his left hand, which is just incredible."
"There's no other 'handed' sportsman who was the best with his dominant arm and a top-4 or better player with his other arm. Hasn't happened in tennis, cricket, golf, baseball, badminton, etc."
- OmNomDeBonBon
A Testicular Game Changer
"Dr. Lawrence Einhorn discovered using platinum-based chemo for testicular cancer. This resulted in cure rates jumping from bleak to over 95%."
- farmerjohn_
"Cisplatin, the drug he pioneered for testicular cancer, is now used to help treat several other cancers, including those of the head and neck."
- alexandercecil
Tiger-Proofed
Tiger Woods Sport GIFGiphy"Tiger Woods was so dominant that he literally changed the game to make it more difficult for him."
"Courses went way longer and became much more challenging. Courses were boasting that they were 'Tiger-proofed.' "
"They'd brag about how Tiger wouldn't be able to shoot par and he would go out and conquer the course."
"Professional golfers in interviews talk about how finishing in second place in a major tournament wasn't even the best part of the day, it was getting to play a round with and admire Tiger."
"Obviously, he has had a fall from grace, but there are more people in the world who took up golf because they admired how dominant Tiger was than any other athlete."
"Gretzky opened up hockey to the American south when he was traded to LA, but Tiger opened up golf to the entire world."
- livinthetidelife
When A Name Says It All
"John B Goodenough."
"Nobody else will ever be good enough after this dude. He invented modern lithium batteries and is currently advancing the next generation of batteries."
"Cheap to produce, recyclable, and are rechargeable with multiple generations of effective charging cycles. Dude reinvented the battery twice!"
- SafetyJosh4life
"I thought you were making his name up. I was like no f*cking way this dudes name is John B Goodenough, but lo and behold Wiki says it’s real."
- Brandon_The_Binosaur
"He also invented Random access memory which is used in every computer too!"
"1980 for Li batteries and 1952 for RAM in air defense computers."
"The cheaper batteries OP mentioned are solid-state batteries which have a much higher energy density than Li ones, are lighter, cheaper to make, recyclable and don't use (or use far less) rare earth metals."
"This guy is almost 100 and just keeps going."
- AlexCook123
"He's a professor, too! That guy is 99 but still teaching at U Chicago."
- Greedy-Secretary-553
She May Never Be Topped
"My fan girl moment is heeeere! Janja Garnbret is undeniably the greatest competition climber in the history of competition climbing, both men and women."
"For comparison, in the men's top competition athletes, both Jakob Shubert and Adam Ondra won 7 world cup seasons and 3 championships. They have been competing in the circuit since 2007 and 2009 respectively."
"Janja has won 9 world cup seasons (in lead and bouldering) and 6 championships (lead, boulder, and combined) and she's only been on the circuit since 2015!!"
"Adam ondra is known (in part) for being the only male athlete to win world cup season titles in both lead and bouldering and for winning championship titles for both in one year."
"Not only has Janja done that; she also is the only athlete (male or female) to win every boulder world cup in a season (2019), to win two championships in a row (boulder and combined, 2018 and 2019.)
"She's one of 2 athletes to win a gold medal at the Olympics by winning both the lead and the boulder round."
"The male gold medalist's win is highly debated."
"So yeah Janja Garnbret may never be topped."
- IHaveNoClue_98
A Long-Running And Unchallenged GOAT
Tim And Eric Comedy GIFGiphy"Weird Al Yankovic is the GOAT of parodies."
- bagpipesfart
"And relevant for… what, 40 years?"
"It’s mind blowing that he is still famous and beloved (in the best way)."
- Secular-Flesh
"Five artists have top 40 hits in 80s, 90s, 00s, and 10s."
"Michael Jackson, Madonna, Kenny G, U2 ...and Weird Al."
- turducken138
"And if you think about it, he is an INSANELY good vocalist."
"It's one thing to sing somebody else's song. But Weird Al sings their song in their vocal style, matching their inflections and intonations."
"It's kind of mind blowing how he was able to make it sound LIKE the song, not just a simple cover with changed lyrics for comedy."
"And its mind blowing because for pretty much everybody the exact minute detail of how you sing a lyric, and the tonality of your voice is basically hard coded by your anatomy. So Al has to modify HOW he makes sounds to force his vocal anatomy to function differently rather the way it wants to."
"It's a bit like re-learning to walk with every song."
"And then...he will do a live concert where he strings the songs together, back to back, so he can flip from one artist's style to another instantly. No need for a warm up, or a bit practice to 'get into the mode.' He just jumps at will."
"The man its quite a good musician all around."
- nordoceltic82
Showboating
"Usian Bolt is the greatest sprinter in history and I would have a hard time taking anyone seriously if they opposed that."
"Nobody every repeated in the 100m at the Olympics. (Carl Lewis got beat, and should have been banned himself that summer.)"
"Bolt 3 peated in both the 1 & 2!"
"And 13 years later, nobody has been within a tenth of his 100m record. And only his teammate has been within 3 tenths of his 200m WR."
- killbot0224
"Even more intriguingly, he showboated in the 2008 Olympic 100m final."
"If I recall correctly, he started slowing down, beating his chest and mock-running at about the 70m mark, which is incredible. His time was 9.69, and if he'd run full tilt it's possible he would've run faster than 9.58, the record he set a year later that still stands."
"Even while showboating, he utterly annihilated what was by far the strongest 100m field in Olympic history."
"Looking at the list of 100m records, the 9.58 in Berlin has stood for 12 years and 7 months."
"This is the longest-standing 100m record since Jim Hines held it for 14 years and 8 months, ending in 1983. Hines' record, however, was set at high altitude in Mexico City."
"As Michael Johnson once said, the person to beat Usain Bolt's records has probably not been born yet."
- OmNomDeBonBon
A Stretcher, Not A Chaser
The Simpsons Animation GIF by FOX TVGiphy"Jane Goodall."
- Stinkydadman
"This was the name that popped into my head immediately. Seems like one of the more 'undeniable' ones to me."
- alniwoo
"Not only she was the undeniably best in the field, but she basically laid down the foundations for so many other studies in primates and comparative behaviour."
"She was a stretcher and not a chaser."
- Tamarnouche
Four Decades Of Pop Culture
"Shigeru Miyamoto, the game designer."
"From Donkey Kong in 1981 through to Zelda: Breath of the Wild in 2017 - that's nearly four decades of critically acclaimed smash hit games."
- [Reddit]
"This should be at the top. Huge influence in the gaming world and pop culture."
- Steve_Kastle_75
"He is single handedly the reason Nintendo is still alive and well today."
"It's insane that when he wants to, he just completely changes entire genres because the games he makes are so good. BotW alone was so good that the game that basically copied it is, in and of itself, a huge hit."
- Mr_Dunk_McDunk
Alright readers, who is your GOAT and what are they the GOAT at?
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"What’s something that is incredibly unhealthy that most people don’t even realize?"
Having Friends Is Good For Ones Health!
"Loneliness."- CaptainGrabality
Always Good To Get On A Routine
"Shift work."
"Nights, followed by lates, followed by earliest."
"Physiologically so destructive."
"I work for the emergency services so it's essential 24/7."
"The management are pretty good but we've been shafted on pay at a national level."
"Still attritional on the body."- PhatNick
Always Try To Get Those Eight Hours
"Chronic lack of sleep."
"Sleep deprivation."- CoolPotatoTomato
Tired Stewie Griffin GIF by Family GuyGiphyNot The Kind Of Energy You Want
"The amount of people who drink soda or Mountain Dew or energy drinks 24/7 and say ‘I feel fine so it must be fine’ is INSANE." - WildFemmeFatale
Get Up And Stretch Those Legs
"Sitting for long periods."
"Both unhealthy and as you get older dangerous."- JoeMorgue
Careful What You Breathe In
"Honestly, most cleaning supplies."
"They’re fine to use in your house, but if you can smell it and your lungs aren’t happy smelling it, you should be wearing an n95 or respirator."
"Bleach is a big one."
"Anything that makes you cough in a small room."
"I know everybody kind of goes crazy about shower stains but your bathroom is too small of an enclosed space to be using strong chemicals without some type of breathing protection."
"Turn the fan on, open the window and use a damn mask."
"Your lungs will thank you in 20 years."
"I never even thought about any of that until I started glassblowing."
"Glass blowing works with a lot of stuff that we have to wear masks for, cold working like sanding down glass, the colored powders, mold materials, enamel paints, asbestos pads, etc."
"Once I got into the habit of protecting my lungs, I realized just how much stuff at home is probably pretty bad to be breathing in also."
"Good news is, a reusable respirator is pretty cheap at any hardware store, the filters aren’t crazy expensive, and it’s surprisingly useful to have."
"Painting, cleaning, replacing 50 year old carpet, any stinky job like when a 70lbs dog has diarrhea all over the house, etc. It’s just handy to have."- huskeya4
clean sailor moon GIFGiphyIt's Important To Have a Little Fun Every Now And Then!
"Stopping yourself from enjoying/doing anything just because other people might not approve of it."
"It can end up being one of the most detrimental things you can do to your health, physically, mentally, spiritually and emotionally."- LustxInfinity·
Just How Much Fruit Exactly Is There?
"A lotta name brand fruit juices have lot more sugar than folks like to pay attention to."- TeriosNaija
Use Those Vacation Days!
"Working so much w only 2 vacation weeks (10 days) a year."- skoldane
Out Of Office Summer GIF by Merge MansionGiphySo, next time you find yourself sitting at home, alone, with nothing to do, take yourself for a nice long walk, or even just a short walk around the block.
Your mind and body will be very grateful for it when you get home.
As a little escape is just what the soul needs, every now and then.
Redditor odeus120 wanted to hear about the signs that make us see how some people should be raising their kids better.
"What screams trashy parents?"
Having waited tables, it's all a red flag. The list is too ling.
Oh Mother
Mean Girls Movie GIF by filmeditorGiphy"Mothers who see their daughter as competition."
Salt-Direction4885
"I see you've met my mom."
MYHAUNTEDPOCKET
On the Socials
"Social media influencers whose entire content is their children. People who publicly punish their kids online, parents who give out way too many details about their children giving them lack of privacy. Child exploitation at its finest."
Rooster-Wild
"There’s a lady on TikTok who posts constant videos of her daughter naked in the bath. Someone else called her out on it and how it’s only harming her daughter so what does she do? Turn off all comments so people will stop harassing her about taking down those videos. And keeps on posting for the pedos."
yorkiewho
The Trashers
"Kids running around a store trashing the place and not a parent in sight."
makeski25
"Many years ago when I worked at WalMart, parents would routinely 'drop off' their kids in the toy department and then just walk through the store, or, worse, go across the street to eat out or shop. So it wasn't unusual to see numerous unsupervised kids just wrecking the toy and sporting goods department."
"I once fussed at a manager to do something about a pair of kids who had put together a bunch of pool noodles and were running down aisle after aisle, just clearing the shelves and knocking stuff to the floor. Manager pulls the kids aside, parents show up, yell at the kids, and the manager comes to me and goes: 'well, I hope you feel better, you made me ruin that kid's night.'"
Blametheorangejuice
It's just a game...
"Cussing out the officials at a little league game. Telling your child to punch another player they tripped over."
SnooChipmunks126
"I coached t-ball, the kids were pre-k to 2nd grade. I had a mother inches from my face screaming at me because I asked her child to sit down for an inning... Because he was hitting kids in the head (with a helmet on) with a bat. It was one of the wildest things I had happen to me. Not the last though."
BitofaCrochetHooker
Any Pepsi?
Baby Drinking GIF by reactionseditorGiphy"When I waited tables in college, I saw a mother fill her young toddler’s bottle with Coca-cola. I thought it was just horrible."
lobsters_love_butter
This is a mess. At least it wasn't a Jack and coke.
Blame
Yup Thats Right GIF by Katelyn TarverGiphy"When their kids could literally set the world on fire and they'll blame anyone else to avoid responsibility."
Difficult_Shine3675
"My sister in law does this. Her kid could set someone on fire and she'd go 'well it's not HIS fault she has on such flammable clothes!'"
HavingALittleFit
Destruction
"Kids destroying other people's stuff/property and the parents are just standing there and laughing like it's a form of amusement. Once went into an older movie store and there was a child bashing the glass with his ball and throwing the movies all over the floors. The mother (presumedly) let her child continue to do that despite others' protests including the manager's. I don't fault the child, doesn't know any better. The mother should've been asked to leave the store with her son."
InfiniteWords117
Stop Yelling
"There is a kid (maybe 8-10 years old) on the other side of my street right now yelling slurs and telling everyone who walks by to go f**k themselves while their parent sits on the porch smoking weed and laughing. This is a regular occurrence. I'm fairly certain the kid has a mental disorder but the fact that the parent seems to be encouraging the behavior is pretty trashy."
SternCoats
The Stench
"Kids that smell like smoke because their parents smoke indoors. It was my parents. Everybody hated when we came over because everything we'd touch would smell like cigarettes as well. Couldn't convince my parents to smoke outside of the home because 'it's their house and they'll do as they please.'"
bumblingbirdy
Control
Frustrated Skip Bayless GIFGiphy"Parents emotionally blackmailing their kids. Using guilt and obligation to control their children."
SuvenPan
We know that raising a family is hard, but these folks need to do better for their kids.
Do you have similar experiences to share? Let us know in the comments below.
Redditor jumpjoom wanted to hear some thoughts on who everyone thought might be today's greatest smarty pants.
"Who is the closest person alive to a modern-day Einstein?"
I know I'm not on this list. So easy place to start.
The Unknown
excited genius GIFGiphy"We probably don't know about them. They're probably buried in some pharma, rocket science, technology company and are content to do their thing."
believeTheError
"I know this absolute child prodigy genius of a mathematician that went to Harvard and was easily one of the best there. He’s currently a professor of a 3rd tier state college."
gigawort
Just as good...
"Even at the time Einstein was alive, it wasn't that he had the most powerful brain or best math ability (many surpassed him here). He worked on and solved some of the most outstanding problems in physics at the time. The late 19th/early 20th century was a special time for physics; classical physics was failing apart but how to fix it wasn't known - Einstein (amongst others) offered some ways to fix things."
"Tons and tons of people are just as 'bright' as Einstein by almost any metric but their work essentially can't as impactful. We're too many decimals deep into measurements now."
Jorrissss
"Emmy Noether comes to mind as a contemporary of Einstein who was easily a better mathematician than he was."
CoastingUphill
Impossible
"I’m going to give a weird answer: John Carmack."
"Just go read some of the things he has done and is doing. From inventing some of the math and programming that gave us the modern computer gaming revolution (this is the guy behind the original doom), to running a rocket company trying to achieve orbit and complete propulsive landings similar to what Space X does today, to dropping everything to create the future of VR."
"Now he’s immersed in AI research on top of everything else. The guy is a walking talking genius who sees things on a whole different level. He spent his whole career doing 'impossible' things in software and hardware. Whether you know his name or not, his work has had a real effect on all of our lives, and likely will be even more impactful in the future as we move toward a more virtually-centered life."
Exodi
Advanced Study in Princeton...
"Ed Witten..."
"American mathematician and theoretical physicist at the Institute for Advanced Study in Princeton. He received his Ph.D. in physics in 1976 from Princeton University. He has made landmark contributions to string theory from the 1980's to the present day, most notably the development of M-theory in 1995. He was awarded the Fields Medal in 1990 for his contributions to mathematics and mathematical physics"
Heap_Good_Firewater
It's all Relative
Good Witch Smile GIF by Hallmark ChannelGiphy"Thomas Einstein, Albert Einsteins great grandson."
XRomaniaIsInSomaliaX
"That dude is a doctor. Imagine living your life having people refer to you as 'Dr. Einstein.' I'd develop a superiority complex."
blue4029
Those Einsteins. They should do a sitcom.
Math Guy
Confused Thinking GIF by JKGiphy"Grigori Perelman the Russian mathematician?"
OverLurking
"My man solved the Poincaré Conjecture and just dipped. I love math and I tried to read his paper and I did not understand a single word. The surgery thing seems like magic to me."
Lufernaal
Tao
"Terrence Tao."
david_rohan
"Apparently a strategy, if you're stuck on a problem at higher level maths is to get Tao interested in what you're working on."
JVM_
"From his Wiki. His research topics include 'harmonic analysis, partial differential equations, algebraic combinatorics, arithmetic combinatorics, geometric combinatorics, probability theory, compressed sensing and analytic number theory.' Just look down the rabbit hole of any one of those theories or topics and your mind will explode."
KardelSharpeyes
And the family...
"All of the Tao siblings are terrifyingly intelligent. I had the pleasure of playing a concert alongside Terence's brother, Trevor. I perform my set and am feeling pretty good about myself, and then Trevor gets up and performs gymnopedie no 1, which is a pretty difficult piece, but the dude did it while solving a Rubik's cube. Needless i say, I, and all the other performers that day, felt quite upstaged."
Haverwolf
"Trevor Tao is also an international chess master and is one of Australia’s top players."
Askyourdaughter
Thought
"Miguel Nicolelis. He created the theory and proofs of the brain net, basically telepathy. Thanks to this he managed to create a machine that a quadriplegic could walk using the power of thought. And it worked. The power of thought From someone else for this quadriplegic to relearn how to think about walking."
DELAIZ
The One and Only
albert einstein GIF by US National ArchivesGiphy"In some fields, science can be so complex and multi-disciplinary that 100s of people have contributed to e.g. gene therapy, CO2 capture or other major contributions to society. So major discoveries can't be attributed to a single person. And most of this science, if published, generally needs affiliations to academia to be taken seriously."
"Einstein was truly one-of-a-kind from his multitude of publications in 1905. I'm 90 percent sure that he wasn't even affiliated with any university at the time. He did it solo, out of nowhere. This makes his discoveries even more impressive! Einstein experts, please confirm that he did in fact not work at a university in 1905. I believe he worked at a patent office."
TheGhettoKidd
I'm not smart enough for this thread but we applaud this next generation of geniuses!
Do you have anyone you'd like to add? Let us know in the comments below.
