People Divulge The Absolute Worst Excuses Their Ex Ever Gave For Cheating On Them
It's never a good feeling to learn that your partner has been unfaithful.
Hearing this news almost instantly gets your mind racing, wondering what it was which led them to do this.
"Was I not present enough?"
"Have I let myself go?"
"Do they not love me anymore?"
If there's anything that could make you feel any worse than this sad list of possibilities, it's whenever they try to justify their behavior.
Often coming up with the most ludicrous excuses for breaking their partner's hearts, which they somehow thought might actually work or at least earn them a little sympathy.
When the only thing they likely got was an open door and a swift goodbye.
Redditor Starboy3210 was curious to hear some of the most ludicrous excuses people had to justify their infidelity, leading them to ask:
"People of Reddit, what is the dumbest reason your (ex) partner gave for cheating?"
So Much For "Till Death do Us Part".
"'You are dying! Do you really want me alone when you are dead?'"
"I was fighting cancer."
"He also told me that I was disgusting and he felt gross touching me."
"Luckily, both types of cancer are out of my life."- Mr_BigDuck
You Could Have At Least Left A Message!
"'You didn't answer your phone, was I supposed to spend Saturday night alone?'"
"I was at work, and so were you, we worked together you f*cking moron."- sixesand7s
Love At First Sight... Or Not
"She met someone that she immediately saw herself marrying."
"A month after we broke up she moved across the country, got married, called me to tell me she made a mistake, got divorced, moved back home, got pregnant and then got married again."- Zarrush
Gonna Have To Do Better Than That...
"Her response once I caught her was that she was flat-out horny."
"But after I said that’s why you have a boyfriend it was kinda funny how she went dead silent."- PuzzleheadedFarm7417
"He said that he cheated on me because I wanted to have too much sex."
"More than 5 years later I still can't find any logic in that."- Etrixie
So Much For Commitment
"'It's not like we're married'."
"Apparently I can't expect respect from someone who goes from calling me 'love of my life' to blowing her high school shag toy when he comes back to town."- FortGeekCartoons Button GIF by NickelodeonGiphy
It Never Is...
“'It’s not what you think it is!'”
"After I walked in on them making out."
"While she was on his lap."
"Both without shirts."- MrSirChris
Two Whole Weeks...
"I couldn't have sex for two weeks so I could recover from surgery so she thought it wasn't cheating'."- Henchforhire
What The Actual...
"My ex-girlfriend said I forgot you were alive."
"For details, I wasn't in the military, I was at university."- Ali8lyscared star wars GIF by Hyper RPGGiphy
That Only Makes It Worse
"It was his kid's mom so it didn't count."- kittenxx96
"In Sickness And In Health"...Oops!
“'I have needs for sex you aren’t helping me with!'"
"Said to me the day I get home from spending a week in the hospital with kidney failure (lupus)."- EndlesslyUnfinished
We Can Only "Open" Our Hearts So Much...
"Well, I know this guy that was convinced he was in an open relationship, except he forgot to let his girlfriend know.."
"She found out 7 years into the 'open relationship'."
"With multiple women, in 4 continents."
"Oh he also had a book where he'd categorize them."- ProfessionalSpite866Episode 2 Player GIF by ABC NetworkGiphy
"My serial cheater ex-once told me while in a fit of tears."
"'I can't stop cheating, I just have so many issues, my mom lied about Santa when I was a kid and it really f*cked me up'."
"'I don't think I can trust people because of it so I cheat'."- pastelflorist
No One Likes To Be Treated Like A Piece Of Meat...
“It’s like if you order the same subway sandwich for a year, eventually you’re gonna get bored of it."
"But you try another flavor and when you go back to the original one it’s better than you remembered'.”
"Felt not so good being compared to a 6 inch BLT tbh."- NucularOrchid
Oh, nothing, except commitment and fidelity...
"'She was prettier than you, what did you expect?'"
"We were engaged and had been dating for 3 years."- kathjoy
No doubt all these poor people are grateful for dodging the bullet that staying with these people would have been.
Even if it can't quite make up for the pain and embarrassment these experiences brought them.
While ignorance may be bliss for the ignorant, it can annoy the heck out of everyone around them.
Ignorance can come from both a lack of information or too much incorrect information.
Redditor rockytheboxer asked:
"What common misconception infuriates you?"
I try to be calm. But anything can infuriate me.
So let's chat.
LiesCat Zoom In GIF by Paul TrilloGiphy
"That you can zoom in on a digital picture and it gets more clear."
"The Dunning-Krueger Effect."
"It's not as simple as dumb people overestimating their intelligence while smart people underestimate it. Once you feel 100% certain in your knowledge, all new information looks like misinformation. Once you believe yourself an 'expert,' you're far less receptive to facts that contradict your position. Self-doubt is what keeps your mind open; the nagging sense that what you 'know' might not be true is what motivates intelligent people to keep pursuing knowledge."
"Studies even show the DK Effect actually horseshoes."
"People at the very bottom and the top tend to over-emphasize their own intelligence. When leading scientists are disproven by new discoveries, it's not uncommon them personally reject the new science. The 'Nobel Disease' describes when Nobel Prize-winners go on to become quacks, believing their 'genius' qualifies them as experts in things outside their expertise."
"Life expectancy. People think hundreds of years ago you died at 40. Completely false. Infant mortality was extremely high so the average is skewed. If you made it out of infancy you had a pretty good chance of becoming old."
"So much this. If half the people born die at age 2 and the other half die at 72, the average life expectancy is 37, but that doesn't mean 'everyone died at 37.'"
"'If they give me a raise at work, I'll bump up a tax bracket, and I'll actually make less!!'"
"Oh man, I just came here to say this. Had a high-level staff meeting last week to discuss how our company will be changing from weekly checks to bi-weekly."
"The uproar, because they were gonna get 'taxed more' was hilarious. I literally had to draw a crude graph for folks who’ve been on this Earth for decades longer than I have in order to explain how a progressive income tax works. My eyes are still rolling."
RuinedAngry Season 3 GIF by Paramount+Giphy
"O.C.D. is not some cute obsession with cleanliness and order. It can ruin lives and comes in many forms."
"I also hate when people play armchair psychologist."
There is such a thing as too clean. Right?
Colorsseason 1 friends GIFGiphy
"As a colorblind person, I don't see in black and white. I have no problem driving. And I will never play the 'What color is this?' game. Not ever."
"The quote 'well-behaved women seldom make history' is frequently misquoted. Professor Laurel Ulrich stated this in a 1976 essay that details how women in early America have been lost to history as their stories weren’t considered important by those who wrote history."
"Her quote is not meant to minimize the lives of women who perform stereotypical 'women’s work' such as mothers and wives, but to stress the issue of women’s voices being lost in history."
"I think it’s important to support women who do not live within these archetypes, but not at the expense of women who enjoy being within these roles. Ultimately, having the voices of diverse women and gender-diverse people documented in history is incredibly important - which should include both 'well-behaved' and rebellious women."
"Introversion and social anxiety are NOT the same things."
"Not every introvert has social anxiety or is a poor communicator. Stop lumping people together and just calling it introversion."
"I’m introverted. I know how to communicate well. I just don’t want to with you."
"That the symbol of the upside-down cross is satanic, evil, witchcraft, etc. I see so many Catholics and Christians going off on people who have upside-down crosses on clothes and stuff because it’s 'evil.' No, it is not. The upside-down cross comes from Peter, who decided to be crucified upside down because he felt he was not worthy of dying in the same fashion that Christ did. It is a symbol of honor, love, and respect for Jesus."
Love DiesIn Love Hearts GIF by SpongeBob SquarePantsGiphy
"People like to believe 'there's someone out there for everyone' but honestly this just isn't true. Or that we only have 'one true love.'"
Everything makes me mad.
But life goes on.
While we all have to do it so that we can pay our bills, some of us would definitely not work if we didn't have to.
But that has less to do with our work ethic and more to do with some of the terrible work experiences we've had.
Redditor 7Earth7Energy asked:
"In all seriousness, what's the worst job you've ever had?"
"Store Santa during my college years."
"Sometimes I enjoyed being 'Santa.'"
"But many times, children were sad and asked for things that likely would never happen, like, as I once commented, 'A new boyfriend for Mommy because she was so lonely ever since Daddy died.'"
"Cashier at a grocery store. The work was fine. My manager was a nightmare."
"Fast food... I know everyone knows its a bad job, but nobody knows the stress that goes round in that kitchen, it's insane."
Unpredictable Cleaning Schedules
"I used to work for a carpet cleaning company. You never knew what you were going to come across that day. There are basically two types of people that use carpet cleaning services:"
"Type One: Pretty much spotless clean house. Perhaps they spilled a glass of wine on the carpet, and they want the stain out. Easy job..."
"Type Two: They had four dogs and never let them out, and there is more s**t in the carpet than carpet."
"Dishwasher. I’ll go to my grave saying that it is the worst possible job you can have."
"Dishpan hands are a real thing and suck a**. You’re the last to leave the restaurant, the least paid, and least respected person in the building."
Plants and Cars
"I can't decide between two, so I'll share both:"
"First, I was 19 and had just dropped out of college. I decided to take a job over the summer building scaffolding in the chemical plants around the Houston ship channel. I lasted exactly two weeks doing that work."
"12-hour days, carrying long metal posts and hammering them together in the hot Texas sun, with the smell of burning chemicals all around you, and a foreman who can't speak English so communicates to you with hand signals and whistles."
"A lot of my classmates went and had full careers working in the plants. I knew then I had no desire to chase that living. That s**t sucked. I hated the work, I hated being there, and I hated that I had no time to do anything because I was always at work or sleeping."
"Second, Car sales. When I first got out of the Navy and was looking for my first civilian IT job, I was having a hard time getting hired anywhere. I took a job selling cars because it's pretty much what I could find aside from barista work."
"Long, long days. Like 14+ hours, calling 'ups' and calling people on the phone to harass them into coming into the store for some 'once in a lifetime deal.' Having to try and get people to buy a car they won't like because that's the one that would get me the bigger spiff, or trying to f**k them on the price because I'd get a higher commission if I did."
"And it was causing so much grief at home because I was never home, and my wife and son were never seeing me, and we were still not making enough money to get by, despite me selling out my own morals every day and hating myself for it."
"And I was so busy at work, I didn't have time to apply and interview for the jobs I actually wanted. I ended up taking a loan from my gramps to help me pay the bills for a few months while I quit this job so I was able to find IT work, which finally paid off."
Out in the Lumberyard
"Working on a lumber mill. I was literally the only employee with all my teeth and all my fingers. Watched a guy take a 14” splinter through his thigh. Board came off the saw and split, half of it opened the guy's leg like stabbing a balloon full of blood. The owner was on the line before medics arrived, yelling at us to get the saws working again."
"I was a medic in the Army and an EMT, so I was working on the injured man. The boss yelled at me to get back to the chain and let the injured man lay there till the medics arrived. I loudly told him to go f**k himself and stayed with the victim."
"He threatened to fire me and I told him I was calling OSHA. He shut up."
World Runs On...
"Dunkin. Literally new staff each week. They don't pay their employees. And they screw you over so bad, they make you quit. Not to mention they don't even put you into the system on purpose, not expecting you to last long."
"Also, it's not Krispy Kream. They don't make their donuts fresh. They wait for a truckload and they gotta microwave them so they're not stiff and frozen."
"Don't buy from Dunkin. They overwork and severely underpay their staff."
The Family Clique
"A small town family-owned diner. It was my first job, they took advantage of me for being young and inexperienced, I was underpaid, and the family who worked there was very cliquey."
"They made jokes at my expense, excluded me from certain things, and overall just didn't treat me well."
Fast Food Woes
"McDonald’s was a s**t show. I worked there for nearly two years back in high school. I’ll never forget the cheeseburger lady."
"She would always order a cheeseburger with no cheese (hamburger, but she wouldn’t take that for an answer) One day, she got cheese on her burger. Note that this wasn’t an allergy thing, she just didn’t like our ‘fake cheese.' When she checked her burger at the window, she saw the ungodly sight of cheese staring back at her."
"She slammed the burger on her lap and screamed at the top of her lungs. She just sat there screaming. I awkwardly tried to consult her but instead, I got the burger thrown at me."
"I was 16 at the time, and I knew I wasn’t getting paid enough for that psycho s**t."
Call Center Life
"Customer Service call center. No one can pay me any reasonable amount of money to go back."
"It’s been six years since I left and I still hate talking on the phone for any reason whatsoever."
"Whoever invented that stupid metric where if your satisfaction is eight or lower is considered a failure, I hope you get stuck with a thousand pine needles and are set on fire."
"This was about 25 years ago. It wasn’t an actual job, but I got roped into volunteering for a St. Patrick’s Day dinner at a catholic church where I lived. There were about 10 of us teenagers and our job was to serve food to the people who’d bought tickets. Corned beef, mashed potatoes, and like, steamed carrots…some s**t like that."
"Anyway, like 100 people showed up and they were the rudest sacks of s**t I’d ever encountered in my life. They treated us like dirt. Total disrespect. And I’m sure their treatment was made worse by the fact that we were kids."
"This was the moment I realized I could never ever work in the food industry. I learned a huge lesson that night and have always gone out of my way to be kind to servers and tip extra. It changed my life."
"But also, the joke's on them. The church refused to let us eat anything until all these a**holes had finished their meals (we were told we had to clean up, too), so we kids just started eating off the plates before serving them. We didn’t give a s**t anymore. Had they treated us better, we wouldn’t have done that. F**k those people."
"I volunteered at a hospital ICU, I was by myself and no one would talk to me. The nurses are pretty quiet and the doctors are major douchebags, and the patients are old and sick."
"Because I was volunteering, I got like $15 credit every day for cafeteria food, but my shift ended right when the cafeteria closed, so sometimes I'd ask if I could leave early."
"The nurses would get p**sed about that and make me stay to the very end, even though my job was literally just to sit there and draw grids for their future logbooks... which I already did all day. Jerks wouldn't even let me get some food."
"Telemarketer. They moved me from an outside sales position into a telephone sales one where I would be reporting to the boss's 19-year-old side piece. Part of the job was keeping it secret from his wife."
"That's the only job I didn't give two weeks' notice at."
"This is not even remotely as bad as others, but babysitting a three-year-old who was obsessed with stairs."
"The kid lived on the first floor of an apartment building and had never really gotten to play on stairs until I was looking after her at my place while her mom was working late and their regular babysitter was unavailable."
"I was 13 or 14 at the time, I think. You can only chase a kid up and down the stairs for so long before you want to curl in a ball and sleep for two days. I played several sports at the time too."
"But after literal hours of her wanting me to chase her up and down the stairs, I wanted to die. Even our dog, a hyper lab mix, had long since pooped out and went off to sleep somewhere, lol (laughing out loud)."
Everyone has their workplace horror stories, but there typically will always be that one workplace that was particularly bad with one day that served as the ultimate deal breaker. At least these experiences help us to appreciate the better opportunities that come along!
People Reveal The Most Out Of Touch Thing A Rich Person Has Ever Said To Them
No matter how empathetic we are, or how hard we try, there are just some things we can't understand without walking in someone else's shoes.
That said, people who live with more privilege can say some especially out-of-touch things.
Prepared to side-eye, Redditor BananaBR13 asked:
"What was the most out-of-touch with reality thing a rich person ever said to you?"
Invest in Property
"My boss asked me why I didn’t just buy a house in her neighborhood instead of renting an apartment. The houses there were $300-500,000 (very pricy for my area), and she was paying me nine dollars per hour…"
"I had literally just applied for food stamps."
"A coworker of mine was talking with a parent once (summer camp in a rich town). The parent mentioned how she loved my coworker's dress, and wanted to know where she bought it, with the stipulation that it cost under $10,000…"
"It turns out she had bought the dress on clearance for something like $10."
"When she explained this, the parent just laughed like it was a joke, saying, 'No really, how much was it?'"
"I've never seen someone thaaat out of touch."
What Paid Vacation?
"Not a quote from the person, but my sister and I were planning a weekend trip with our two cousins, and one of them just could not understand why we couldn’t make the trip longer and couldn’t seem to understand the concept of taking time off work and that we can’t just not show up whenever we feel like it."
Yeah, Because That's the Same.
"I was complaining about mortgage payments, and she said, 'I know, I finally just took the money out of savings and paid mine off so I wouldn't have to worry about it every month.'"
Yay for Trust Funds
"I overheard a girl (one of my wife’s cousins, whose dad is very, very wealthy) say, 'Yeah, things got really rough for a bit there, I even had to pull money from my trust fund.'"
" I actually laughed out loud and she looked at me disapprovingly because I wasn’t in the conversation."
"This same girl gets an allowance (separate from the trust) of $6k per month. When she turned 21, she posted on Facebook, 'Hooray everyone, I finally got a raise this week!'"
"Everyone was congratulating her on her hard work, which is funny because she doesn’t have a job, it just meant her monthly allowance increased because she got older."
Tales from the Gift Closet
"One time a client’s kid gave a coworker an iPad. Brand new, unopened box. My coworker was a little uncomfortable receiving such an expensive gift from a kid."
"The kid just said, 'Don’t worry, I just grabbed it out of the gift closet.'"
"We were confused, so we asked him what a gift closet is."
"Apparently, their family keeps a whole closet loaded with stuff like this - Apple Watches, cameras, iPads, etc so that whenever they need to give a gift, they always have something on hand."
"In college, I was washing a bowl in the sink and someone said, 'That's the weirdest thing about college for me, not having a dishwasher.'"
"I said, 'Man, I didn't have one until high school and it was s**t so it couldn't clean pans.'"
"Him: 'Oh, I meant like someone to wash the dishes for us...'"
"Me: 'You're joking, right?'"
"He was not joking, but I got invited to their upstate place for spring break so that was cool."
Oh Yes, the Nanny...
"My husband was on a business trip w some rich people in Hawaii. They asked why I didn’t come."
"He told them I was home with the kids."
"The guy said, 'Well, couldn’t the nanny just stay with them?'"
"Nice enough guy. Just out of touch for sure."
Gotta Have That Car
"Back when I worked in payroll, a doctor yelled at me because his administrator didn’t process his bi-monthly incentive on time so it missed his check"
" He was supposed to go pick up his new Mercedes with that money (it was 6 figures) so he threw a fit to have a check cut that day."
"Two weeks later, that same doctor did not approve a check to be cut for an hourly employee whose hours (two weeks' worth) didn’t get approved on time because it was only $1000 and they wouldn’t miss it."
"I had to go above him to get it approved because I knew that employee would definitely be negatively impacted by not being paid on time."
Tell Me Something I Don't Know
"2008, Great Recession: My job was cut from full-time salary to hourly, and then my hours were cut regularly."
"My boss, the business owner who was in the midst of a company-paid whole home remodel, handed me my paycheck and said, 'Wow, you don’t make s**t!'"
"I didn't go to college for seven years after high school due to struggles with alcoholism and bipolar disorder."
"A kid I worked with asked me what I was doing working and going to school at 25, and when I said I took time off due to personal issues, his response was, 'Wow, if you're not making at least 100 K a year at 25, you've basically f**ked your life up.'"
Why Didn't We Think of This?
"Why have roommates at all? I don't think anyone I knew had roommates. Seems like too much trouble. Just spend the extra hundred on rent and live in peace."
"Said by an 80-year-old man."
Cheaper to Replace Than to Fix
"'If your car is broken, why don't you just go buy a new car?'"
"He was dead-pan serious."
Travel Those Feelings Away
"'Oh, you get seasonal depression? Why don’t you just go to the Caribbean for a week and the Mediterranean the next? It always helps me.'"
"I have a friend and she is very wealthy. She was talking about finding a charity for Christmas."
"I mentioned that there were people going places and paying off Christmas layaways. I mentioned a town I grew up in as a possibility. I told them the per capita income is 9k."
"And she said, '9k a month!!!! How do those people live!'"
"Then I had to tell her it was 9k a year. She was floored."
"She is actually a very very sweet and caring person and donates millions a year to so many wonderful places and causes."
While these people likely meant well, it's eye-opening to see how little financially privileged people understand about how people in lower income brackets live.
Hopefully some of the people in these stories had their eyes opened and were able to make a difference, especially that last one.
People Share The Most Disturbing Theories About Disney Movies They've Ever Come Across
Disney films hold a special place in people's hearts.
Iconic animated films like Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs and Peter Pan have transcended time and continue to enchant new generations while contemporary classics like Beauty and the Beast and Aladdin revived the genre when Disney struggled through an uninspired transition during rough economic times.
All of these films regardless of the decade in which they dazzled moviegoers have one thing in common. They inspire hope through the empowering message that the love of family and friends endure in even the toughest of times.
But underneath all the magic, dreams coming true, and happily ever afters, some plot points may have been more sinister than the conflicts presented to our beloved protagonists in the final cut.
Fans have explored fascinating theories that may have driven the storyline that was absent from the animators' storyboards.
To hear some examples of these, Redditor Marquis_de_Skiatook asked:
"What’s the most disturbing Disney movie theory?"
Identities of certain characters were explored.
The Sales Pitch
"The merchant at the beginning of Aladdin is just making up the story, as he is just trying to sell you a lamp, which is crazy because the Dead Sea Tupperware was a better deal."
Who Fired The Shot?
"Bambi's mom wasn't just killed by a hunter. She was killed by a poacher."
"There's a hunting scene right before winter where the whole family escapes. That was hunting season. You don't hear a single gunshot during the winter because it's off season. Bambi's mom was killed in early spring by a poacher."
The Little Teacup
"There's a line in Be Our Guest that specifies '10 years we've been rusting...' meaning they've been enchanted for 10 years at that point. Chip is pretty clearly well under 10 when they break the spell and he becomes human. Which means that either the spell also froze their ages in time, or the teapot version of Mrs. Potts both conceived a teacup child (with who/what?!) and gave birth at some point."
"Also, there was a cupboard full of teacup children that weren't given names that also appeared to be under Mrs. Potts's care. What's the deal with those kids?!"
These films may need PG-rated prequels.
Child Was Suspect
"Lilo is responsible for her parents death because she failed to bring pudge the fish a sandwich."
An Egg-cellent Theory
"Gaston was responsible for single-handedly supporting the egg industry of Southern France based on the amount of eggs he consumed, and his death caused a minor economic depression."
Woody's Original Owner
"Woody is Andy’s fathers old toy and it’s the only thing he has to remember him."
Some Disney films may have war commentaries.
A Duck's Origins
"My favorite is Donald Duck being a WW2 vet. Donald is responsible for single-handedly taking an island from the Japanese, but the experience gave him serious PTSD and that's why he acts the way he does. The Department of Defense officially issued him an honorable discharge in 1984, meaning he retired as well."
Quacked Up History
"this was canon that Donald duck was a sailor but US naval fleet. But not many people know he was also Airborne or a para-marine."
"thats entirely his gimmick from the disney war propaganda videos."
"being in the marines at the time meaning donald duck would've seen pearl harbor from the hawaiian training videos all the way to the dolittle raids which is why he also knows how to fly a plane in the event if the pilot gets shot dead."
"donald duck was an airman in the pacific theater and took over entire japanese gun nests. Due to the time of the video(Commando Duck), the layout on the map and very much the actual role donald duck was a paratrooper in Guadalcanal."
"Donald duck wasn't a reservist or a volunteer since he was drafted so very much he fought all this mostly against his will. So it questions me why we would be there untl discharged in 1984."
"basically there is proof that everything that the previous person said is 100% true by overlooking two videos. Commando Duck 'Donald Duck vs Japan' and Donald Duck gets drafted as the release timing of both videos would match up the which battled and what unit Donald Duck would've fought in canonly. Based on merit he probably retired as a sergeant or e-5 rank. i did too much research."
"Its safe to say that Donald Duck was a paratrooper serving the 11th Airborne division n the battle of Guadalcanal. No only that he served in Guadalcanal but the timing itself means that Donald Duck served in Midway, Coral Sea, Pearl Harbor, Papa New Guinea, and the Philippines, Palau, Okinawa and based on the timing of the US fleet naval movements and as well as the history of the unit. Donald Duck probably seens some of the worst losses in US history and slept under the constant nightmare of a Japanese Air raid, death camps, jungle combat. It is also possible he saw combat in the Korean war since the same unit was posted for Korea but because he wasn't discharged until 1984 its save to say hes been in combat until Vietnam."
"Cars takes place long after a war where the sapient machines wiped out their human creators."
"Cars has a cars pope. Christianity is canon in the cars universe. This meaning there was also a cars Jesus who suffered a cars crucifixion."
"Furthermore the Jeep character is actually canonized as a WW2 veteran. There was a cars WW2 this meaning there was also a cars Hitler who killed scores of presumably Jewish cars."
While many of these examples have not been officially substantiated by Disney, they sure do add another level that heightens the stakes for challenges faced by our favorite characters.
But one thing is certain.
You may never look at some of these classics the same way again.