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Teachers Who've Had To Tell A Class About A Student Death Break Down How It Went

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Teachers Who've Had To Tell A Class About A Student Death Break Down How It Went
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Being a teacher means you must learn to juggle many hats. Teachers are secondary parents, counselors, buddies, mentors... the list is endless. And as much as the job of a teacher is fulfilling, it is also stressful and tear jerking. Sometimes being the bearer of that news in unavoidable. And there is no easy way to say it.

So be kind to teachers, they have pain too.

Redditor u/CTE2028 was hoping the educators reading would be willing to share some stories by asking.... Teachers Of Reddit have you ever had to explain a students death if so what did you tell them?

3rd period

Monsters Inc Hug GIFGiphy

A kid in one of my high school classes died in his sleep over Spring Break. Some sort of random heart failure.

They didn't make an announcement but word traveled pretty quickly because he was a prominent member of the cross-country team. Anyway, 3rd period rolled around and his best friend walked in smiling and laughing with someone. When the bell rang, she asked someone near her where her friend was. We all heard and realized she didn't know yet. My poor 25-year old, fresh-out-of-college history teacher had to pull her aside to tell her that her best friend was dead. She ran out of the room crying and he looked sick to his stomach. Then he had to teach our class.


The Worst Day

I was a long term sub for a middle school band teacher out on pregnancy leave. Two weeks in, the Principal let me know first thing in the morning that the teacher I was subbing for had lost her child and I should let each class know. The students were close to the teacher and they should know he said. This was 25 years ago, so no internet. I was fresh out of college and I suggested that perhaps he should do it or maybe even a counselor.

He let me know that everyone was too busy and if I had a problem I could quit. I was only a sub after all. So for the next six bells, I let each class know that sometimes life doesn't go as you hope and that parents can lose a child before they are even born. It did not get easier as the day went on.

It is still the worst day of education in my entire career.


Caleb & Alexa

A couple years ago one of our Pre-K students had a little sister die from a congenital heart defect. We live in a small area and all the kids knew her because we had had a bunch of fundraisers and the student talked about his sister often. When she died we felt very unprepared to talk to the kids about why Caleb wouldn't be at school and what had happened to his sister. My co-teacher bought a book to read them (can't remember the title now). We were all crying when we talked to the kids, but trying to stay calm. We explained how it was okay to be sad, that Caleb would be sad when he came back to school.

We told them it was ok to ask about Alexa but Caleb may not want to talk much about her and that was ok. I remember specifically my co teacher saying "I know we all prayed for Alexa. And God did give her a new heart, but she had to go to heaven to get it." One of the absolute hardest days in my life. The kids were very sweet and understood way more than we thought they would.


Sweet Girl

At the school my mom works at, a 3rd grader died from a glioblastoma. She was really well known in the area; her parents did an amazing job bringing awareness about this particular form of cancer, and they did a lot of fundraisers for her treatment/travel expenses. My mom works with kindergarteners, and her students didn't really know how to react regarding the death. My mom and the other teacher (my mom is a paraprofessional) decided to mention it, and if anybody wanted to talk about they would (and they did).


Don't Ask

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My mom died when I was in the 5th grade.

I knew the teachers told everyone before I came back to school because they all treated me like I was going to explode. When a friend finally asked me a question about my mom, another student said that the teacher told them not to say anything to me about it. It left me feeling like I couldn't share my grief or my memories of my mom with my school friends.


In Shock

Not a teacher, but we had a student in one of my smaller university classes pass away unexpectedly one day. The teacher came into class looking clearly upset and simply told us what had happened. We all just sat there and took a few minutes to soak the news in. I'm pretty sure we wrote some condolences to their family at one point. No one could really believe it. They were really outgoing and had a good rapport with everyone, so the whole dynamic of the class felt a little off after that. It felt so strange seeing that one desk remain empty for the rest of the semester.


Teachers need more love in this world.....

Not a teacher but had a fellow student die in middle school on Mother's Day. It was very hard for my teacher to explain, because it was an accident, she was hit by a car while at the beach with her mom. I remember the teacher crying and giving us all time to process, but I think she did the best she could do in that situation. I can't imagine how teachers deal with this sort of thing. Teachers need more love in this world.


After the Bliss....

I didn't have to explain it, but I did have a student die.

It was a week after "remote learning" had ended for the school year this June. It was basically ungraded remote learning, meaning only a small percentage of students actually logged in. I can't say I would have done much work when I was in middle school and knew it was ungraded. This particular student never did any of the online work.

I got a call literally on my wedding day from my principal. The ceremony was over, and I was having a meal with my parents and new husband. The principal explained to me that the student had passed away in a car crash the day before. Apparently, someone took a video of the aftermath, and some of the kid's severed body parts were visible. My principal told me to watch out for any students grieving or mentions of the video (never heard anything). It was an odd conversation, as after talking about a student who had died, my principal then congratulated me on getting married.



Sadness Reaction GIF by MOODMANGiphy

I had a girl die in my Spanish class in HS that I was somewhat friends with. Very sad... went missing one day and was found about 3 days later in the back of a burned vehicle.

It was awful because we had a clock with 12 hours each hour representing a partner to practice with. Jasmine was on my clock. Every day someone didn't have a partner on that clock because one of us was murdered... and this was in a small town where that evil doesn't happen. First person I ever somewhat knew that passed, all because a boyfriend and a different girl got in some stupid dispute and then decided to kill her...

Our teacher didn't exactly handle it well though to answer the question. It was a very difficult time for the whole school.


Could've done better....

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Same. Watched my girlfriend's little sister die in a car accident with her family. Threw up for days after. So sad. Got a "you shouldn't have missed class" from my professor for missing class that day, when he knew what had happened, and an "I don't care what happened". He apologized for being hard on me for that a few weeks later, but still...

Also someone I sat next to in high school died in a car accident the night before class. A high school counselor came in and said one of our classmates had died. Didn't say who. My good friend was out that day in that class, as well as about 5 others. Didn't know who it was until the bell rang and finally found someone that knew and everything went on as normal. Handled so poorly.


In Costume

Oh my god. I actually left teaching for a year to do administrative work at the end of the year when this happened. We had a particularly beloved junior in high school who was murdered by a family member. The event was so shocking it was all over the news about as fast as the school learned about the event. It happened on a Tuesday night, we learned about it Wednesday night via email, and there was a school announcement the next day over loudspeaker.

When students asked what happened, one student pulled out his phone and showed a news article around to several students in the class. The class was so horrified, they asked if we could pause the day, and then there was forty minutes of sniffling and crying and I think that was the worst classroom experience I've ever had.

Several students who didn't even know the guy who died couldn't stop themselves from crying because of recent deaths in their own family.

To top it all off, it was during spirit week and many student had shown up in costume, and they slowly started to take off distracting pieces, and asked around for jackets or something to cover up their attention grabbing outfits. I would wish that experience on no one.


The Twins


I had twin brothers. Both missed school for a while. One returned with a note from his aunt. She wrote that their parents didn't write the note because they were in their country of origin because of the brother's death.

I interpreted that as the uncle (the parents' brother). Instead, the family had visited their home country, and one of the brothers died.

The surviving twin came back to school, but the parents were mourning and taking care of the dead twin's funeral.

When I eventually figured out my mistake, I notified the counselor. A week later, because the school moves slowly, one of the wellness counselors came to my room to announce the dead twin's death to the class. I hope to never have to do that again.


She was young....

Sad Pauly D GIF by A Double Shot At Love With DJ Pauly D and VinnyGiphy

Not a teacher. In Grade 1 a girl died at our school. I remember our teachers being very sad.

She was always sick and very tiny. On her last birthday she brought lots of nice stuff for us cake, junk food and we had so much fun. I remember these meringue thingies with different colors. Apparently she died of HIV. It was the late 90's. I don't remember what we were told exactly just that she wouldn't see her again.



Not a teacher but I've had several situations like this.

Elementary school teacher was killed in a car accident on her way to school. She was my older sister's teacher. Small school in southern Oklahoma, so they brought each grade to the auditorium one at a time to give us the news. Counselors were available. Handled very well by an otherwise fairly crappy school.

In high school, my senior year. First period, the principal comes in, which is exceedingly rare, and tells us a classmate had passed away. He and I were practically inseparable in middle school, but had grown apart in high school. Barely saw each other or spoke. He had dropped by my house a few days before and I basically told him I was too busy to talk to him and sent him on his way. I carry a lot of guilt over that. Never found out 100% what happened, as the rumor mill started immediately, but I believe it was suicide. Tearing up just thinking about it. Janusz, I'm sorry man.


Only 21

I have taught for 18 years and fingers crossed, have never lost a "current" student (I teach music so I get my kids for 8 years). I have, however, lost two former students. One to a motorcycle accident, and my favorite student I have ever had killed himself two days after my youngest child was born.

He was only 21. I still think about him all the time, and it has been 9 years. Smart, creative, funny. Not a chance I wouldn't have been absolutely broken if I had to explain it to other kids. I am so sorry for you teachers who have had to.


Awful Response

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A girl killed herself my sophomore year and they just sent a mass email to the teachers so they could tell us.

I was in math at the time and my teacher just told us what happened then said we shouldn't let it get in the way of our lesson and kept teaching. Messed up thing is she was in his seminar which in our school was where a group of students is assigned to a teacher freshmen year through senior year and he just could not have cared less.


If you or someone you know is struggling, you can contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255).

To find help outside the United States, the International Association for Suicide Prevention has resources available at

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Indigenous Americans Share Their Tribe's Best Ghost Stories And Legends

Reddit user A_KULT_KILLAH asked: 'Native Americans of Reddit, what are your or your tribes ghost stories, legends, or supernatural occurrences?'

Jon Sailer on Unsplash

People the world over develop their own specific folklore, heavily influenced by the natural world around them and their own culture.

The North American continent was no different.

Reddit user A_KULT_KILLAH wanted to know about the myths and legends of the Indigenous peoples of North America.

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Every now and again, when talking to a friend or family member, a rather shocking piece of information might casually slip out.

Information one imagines they wanted to keep secret for as long as they possibly could.

In some cases, it's something embarrassing, that everyone will be able to laugh about with the passage of time.

In other cases, however, it's information that stuns us silent.

Learning something we wish we hadn't.

Redditor DarthAbhinav11 was curious to hear the most disturbing information people have ever been casually told or overheard, leading them to ask:

"What is the most disturbing thing you've heard said casually?"

An Acquired Taste

"I work in a deli and some lady asked me to cut her ham extremely thin to the point of seeing through it."

"I heard her justify it as 'so you can get rid of the ham taste'."

"I still think about this one."- Alternative_Net8931

Utterly Horrid

"When I was walking to my front door."

"My neighbor had their window open and was scolding their 3 year old adopted child."

"She was howling crying."

"'Do you want mommy to send you back?'"- BoredBSEE

It Arrives Sooner Than You Think...

At Macy's, two teen girls: 'Women over 30 have the ugliest elbows'."

"'OMG. I know'."

"'Very disturbing'."

"'I always ask my mom to wear long sleeves when we go out to eat'."- CapitalPhilosophy513

Never Too Late

"I when younger I worked at a pool and had to lifeguard senior aerobics classes."

"Most participants where 65+."

“'Where’s so and so'.”

“'Oh he won’t be here, his wife was put into hospice'.”

“'Well I feel bad for him, but we do need some more single men around here'."

"'He’s not bad looking, has a retirement too'.”- CuriousOne9320

Round And Round It Goes...

"'If the Earth is spinning, then why my front door is always facing east?'"- SuvenPan

"Something I once heard a passing stranger say for which I have no context: 'He wears a scarf around his neck so you can't see where he's decaying'."

"I've been curious for years and it annoys me that I'll never know."- xyanon36

Breaking Up Is Hard To Do

"An ex after I ended things 'I don’t understand, if I want to be in a relationship with you but you don’t want to be in a relationship with me why do you get to win?'"- TinyFurryHorseBeak

Not His Decision To Make

"Was at an end of season event for my kid's baseball team when he was little."

"The coaches brought Italian ice for everyone."

"Mom has just served her kids and husband and comes back with her own."

"As she's sitting down to eat, I hear her husband loud whisper behind her something like 'absolutely not'."

"'You don't need any more calories'."

"I just watched her face fall."

"I can't imagine what their marriage must look like behind closed doors and what life must be like for her."


"Note that this woman was already probably a size 2 at most so this was not a scenario where there were serious weight-related health problems."

"This guy was just a jerk and this really wasn't the first time that season, but his reminders that they aren't living up to his standards were usually aimed at his kids on the field."

"I try to assume the best of people but that guy sucked."- littleirishpixie

The Truth Hurts

"I was in an accident once and was hospitalized."

"The accident left me severely disfigured."

"I was out of my mind on pain meds when I arrived at the hospital and told my family to call my girlfriend and let her know what happened and where I was."

"My mom called my girlfriend and my sister not knowing the particulars of my life called my ex."

"Neither knew the other had called and both ended up showing up."

"They arrived within an hour of one another while I was asleep."

"Since someone was there with me it gave my family a chance to go home and take a break."

"So I woke up to my ex and my girlfriend talking to one another."

"Obviously my girlfriend was mad my ex was there and things got heated between the two."

"My ex being level headed suggested they step into the hall since I was half awake and in no condition to deal with the drama."

"As they're arguing in the hall voices are being raised until finally a nurse comes to reign the situation in."

"The nurse breaking them up made my girlfriend leave."

"As she was leaving she yelled 'you can have his a**'."

"'It's not like I wanna be with some burnt up scarred dude anyway'."

"'He's f*cked'."

"At this point I was still bed ridden and hadn't seen a mirror."

"I was aware my body was f*cked but had no idea what I actually looked like."

"Hearing that was such a gut punch and it really messed with my head at the time."- Burnvictim49percent

Where To Even Begin?

"I am a tutor."

"I heard some of my students say ;What's the point in learning history? We should live in the present'."

"We are German."- GentlemanPirate13

Most of the time, when a friend or family member warns us or apologizes for sharing "too much information" or "TMI", what we've heard isn't that shocking in the grand scheme of things.

Indeed, as evidenced by the sad and shocking stories above, when people really share TMI, they often have no idea they're doing so.

A hand adds a yellow post it to a wall of yellow post its
Photo by Kelly Sikkema

There are rules in life where people are expected to just know how to operate without being told.

For instance, if someone falls down... help them.

When you like a sweater in a store... get money to buy it.

Just leaving with it won't go over well.

And there are more rules, or guidelines to adhere to...

Redditor christygl7 wanted to hear about what is expected in people's homes without words, so they asked:

"What's an unwritten rule in your household?"

If you have to pee... lift the seat cover.

The people in Port Authority always miss that one.


Cleaning Chores GIF by SpongeBob SquarePantsGiphy

"Either my wife or I can do any chore when noticed. We thank each other for routine chores as we appreciate each other."


"That’s how my fiancée and I handle chores. Whoever’s around when the core needs to be done does the chore, typically. I find she does more regular cleaning of the whole apartment while I do more dishes and cooking."



"Replacing the trash bag IS PART OF taking out the trash."


"Similar to this, in my house, the rule is if the toilet paper ended on your turn (or there’s barely enough for the next person) then it is your job to procure the next roll and put it in the bathroom. It is NOT acceptable to let it run out for the next person."


"We have extra stored in every bathroom. I make sure of it. However, if it runs low/out on the roll, my wife will 100% of the time take the new roll and set it on top of the empty tube on the spindle, refusing to replace it. I actually called her over and shamed her into changing it in front of me the other night (not in an abusive way - we were both laughing about it)."


Finder's Keepers

"If you find money in the laundry while you are doing the laundry, it's yours."


"Yep. My boyfriend learned that lesson the hard way when we first started living together. He had a bad habit of just crumpling up bills in a big wad in his pocket, usually just ones, but sometimes he accidentally leaves a twenty in there. I tipped myself the twenty. It took him a couple of days of trying to figure out where it went before I took pity on him and told him."

"He now both turns out his pockets and washes his own clothes. I still find the occasional single dollar in the dryer."


Dropped something?

"If food is dropped on the floor it becomes the property of the dog. The dog knew this rule before we did."


"That was one of the hardest things after our family dog died. Dropped something? Who cares! Riley will get it. But then he didn’t."

"Also, I don’t live at home anymore but coming home to him barking and crying out of excitement and greeting me always made my day and I looked forward to it every time I opened the door and could hear him wiggling in excitement on the side hahaha. It’s a little less exciting coming home now."



Water Stay GIF by Kinda FunnyGiphy

"If the water you take from the Brita pitcher leaves what’s left below a certain line, you are obligated to refill the pitcher on penalty of death."


If you stay in my home and don't refill the Brita pitcher...

I'm setting your hair on fire at 3 AM!!!


Go Away Pink GIF by HacklockGiphy

"Check the toilet after you flush."


"This. My brother-in-law never does this. It's annoying and disgusting! You don't want to clean up after yourself because you think it's gross? How do you think it makes me feel to clean up after you?"



"Wake someone up if their alarm goes off. It's a pretty weird one but setting up alarms is a conscious and deliberate decision for all of us and you want to wake up when it goes off, so we just help each other out."


"I'll do this a few times, but my roommate needs to learn not to hit snooze because he's taught his body that alarms don't need to be woken up to. I don't wake him up anymore. He started waking up to them."


"I’ll wake them up because it annoys me when people snooze especially if I’m next to them in the bed and I don’t have to get up."


No Exceptions!

"Shoes off at the door. No exceptions."


"Shoes-on people must not be using the same public bathrooms that I do. 100% of them have a lake of dirty urine in front of the urinal. They must also be amazing at finding two urine-free spots that are shoe-sized on the shores of said lake. It’s fine if they want to bring that into their homes. It’s not allowed in mine, though."


Table Manners

"No tech at the table."

"Even with a teenage daughter this has proved eerily easy; we all love food though!!"

"Also murder is out of the question, it is non-negotiable. If any of us kills another then they are outlawed in the true sense."

"Other than this, we are pretty cool."



Well Done Applause GIF by MOODMANGiphy

"Let the dog out to go potty before you use the restroom. (Seriously, the dog is asking to go out and you think she can wait while you take a 30-minute poop first? Not cool.)"


Always let the dogs go first.

If you wait, you won't like the surprise they leave!

person using laptop computer to make a credit card purchase on Unsplash

Sometimes we look at a product and think "who would buy that, and why?"

For me the "Flowbee" home haircutting tool comes to mind. If you're unfamiliar, it's a shaver you attached to your vacuum cleaner so you hair was pulled past cutting blades.

It was sold on late night infomercials in the 1990s.

Who wouldn't want to style their hair like this?

Flowbee infomercial GIFGiphy

As fabulous as that looks, results did vary with most veering toward "yikes!" yet by 2000 the company reported 2 million were sold.

And *surprise* you can still buy one—for about $150.

It seems no matter how bad a product is, someone will buy it.

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