Teachers Describe The Strangest Thing One Of Their Students Has Ever Done In The Classroom
Teachers have a TOUGH job.
They mold the minds of the future, and literally provide childcare for 8 hours a day for countless kids all over the place. The profession demands our utmost respect and gratitude.
Fortunately, there are some perks for those who choose the role of educator.
And one of the best bonuses has to be having a front row seat to the truly bizarre things that kids say and do. The not-yet-formed humans of society are a trove of illogical conclusions and confident absurdities.
Lucky for us, some teachers on Reddit filled us in on what's been going on in that classroom.
Spacedoggo73 asked, "Teacher's of Reddit, what is the strangest thing one of your students has done in your classroom?"
For some reason, food comes into play quite a lot.
Several responses in the thread centered around the weird behavior that kids exhibit whenever food and eating comes into play.
First Things FirstÂ
"I had a student who was new to the class and didn't speak English. In his first few days in the class, I looked around and didn't see him. I had a moment of panic but then happened to look down."
"He was sitting under his desk eating an entire ear of corn. He just looked at me and gave me the biggest smile, I had to let the man finish his meal."
Just Going For ItÂ
"I have a 'you can eat in my class as long as the food isn't loud. At any time if your food disturbs me or your peers your privilege is gone' policy"
"Most of the time, zero issues. Everyone agrees no chips or anything crunchy is allowed, no cans of soda etc. Most kids have a sandwich or a banana. At worst, a loud apple."
"One kid, well, he didn't break the rule, but it totally f*cked me up. I'm lecturing about whatever, and right there in the front row, this kid is eating an Orange like an apple, peel and all."
"No noise, but I couldn't get over the fact that he was chewing up the orange peel like it was the best part of the orange. I had to stop lecture and literally address him. Like, you eat the peel dude? What the fu-heck?"
"I didn't want to embarrass him or anything, but I could not really let go of it. It was bizarre. Later I learned some cultures are pro peel eating. Weird"
-- bad_scribe
ChaserÂ
"Not a teacher. It was in 4th grade."
"Somebody came in with a snack and a bottle of hot sauce, and when finished with the snack downed bottle."
-- C1NN430N
Other people focused not on what kids did, but what they said.
Again, children tend to make some strange--and hasty--logical leaps based on very minimal knowledge of the world. This can make for some truly fantastic acts of free association in the classroom.
That's a FactÂ
"6th grader, who the week prior told me he was getting moved to honors science, stuck a paperclip in a light socket that caused a very short-lived fireball."
"Another time an 8th grader asked, 'when you die, how long before you become a ghost?' Before I could answer, his friend (with the utmost confidence) said, 'yeah, after 10 years.' "
"I couldn't get him to divulge his source for such information"
-- Qerfuffle
Everybody NowÂ
"Wasn't my class, but had a friend whose entire class stood up and simultaneously said 'butt lickers,' and then they all sat down." -- Douglas_Funny1989
"The hivemind has influenced them" -- The_darter
Where Did That Come From?
"Why must I only pick one? Okay I love this story. I had the kids sitting on the rug completely silent while I was writing the morning message (I teach young elementary).
"Out of nowhere one of my students yells 'ride that bi***.' "
"I was crying, trying so hard not to laugh. I called his mom later and had to repeat what he had said without laughing."
"She said 'where did he learn that?!?! I'm married to a woman". Why are you asking me? I have no idea.' "
"I have like 50 more stories, but that one always makes me smile."
-- JLG113113
And finally, some interpreted the prompt in the broadest sense. They simply shared the weirdest antics and behaviors to ever grace the four walls of their class.
Queen ForeverÂ
"A first grade girl was making a tiara during free draw time (I teach art)."
"She apparently couldn't figure out how to attach a strip of paper long enough on the front of the tiara she drew and cut out, so she ended up gluing it to her forehead."
"She was super proud when she showed me."
-- gghigh
All Planned OutÂ
"Middle school teacher here. Had a girl come into homeroom, open her backpack, take out a fully inflated balloon (which has taken up a Lion share of the space in her backpack; I don't remember if she had actual supplies with her that day) and began hitting her friend over the head with it."
"I couldn't stop laughing."
At Long LastÂ
"My first year teaching high school, there was this kid who always asked me 'Sir can I throw my chair at the wall?' And I can tell he was serious. The answer was always no."
"Christmas holidays roll around. Him and his friend were the only ones to show up to class. We're last period before end of the day. Bell goes off, 2 weeks vacation."
"He asks again, 'Sir, can I throw my chair at the wall?' "
"... 'ok, you get one throw. Merry Christmas.' (I specified he throw it at a particular brick wall, so nothing was damaged)"
"He put everything he had into it."
More Alarming Than the RestÂ
"A kid in my class handed me some scraps of paper and asked if I would throw them away. I looked in my hand and saw what appeared to be ripped up money."
" 'Yeah, but it's fake. A kid on the bus was handing them out. He gave me these too,' the young man said as he handed me two very real hundred dollar bills."
"It turns out a kid broke into his parents' safe and stole $1300 of his own family's money so he could hand it out on the bus. This was money that his family was planning to spend on Christmas gifts. This was not at all a wealthy family. Fortunately, it was all recovered."
-- Dorseywhite
And so, if you find yourself debating if teaching might be the right career for you, be sure to ask yourself: "Do I enjoy fielding bizarre questions and hanging out with miniatures versions of The Three Stooges all day?"
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Image by Omar Medina Films from Pixabay |
As seen on TV. That line reverberates through all of our minds. Right? I haven't fallen for the, call me know and order group, thankfully. But I have enjoyed their commercials. And I have been duped by the other mediums. I'm still waiting on some things I ordered off of Facebook. And who doesn't owe money to the... buy 9 CDs for a cent group? But once and awhile the product is real and the "scam" is a deal.
Redditor u/drichm2599 wanted to know what items we need to start buying by asking... What "as-seen-on-TV" product really works as advertised?A lot of the Shark Tank folks have made their way to tv to hock items, and it worked, and people are happy! So there has to be some truth to a few things. Let's see what items we should all look for...
The Cleanse
Oxy-Clean is pretty amazing.
I no longer consider Oxy-Clean an ASOTV product. It is a part of everyday life.
I mean, when name brands are bragging that they have the cleaning power of Oxy-Clean, it has made it to the big time.
FLEX
Flex tape.
I work for an HVAC supplier and our delivery box truck struck the awning of a restaurant and put a 6"x6" hole in the 'box' part. Threw some flex tape on that witch and it's been sealed for over eight months so far, including a rough winter.
Gutted
That leaf filter thing for your gutters. Haven't worried about them in awhile and even set up my parents house with them so they didn't try to climb a ladder.
These have been around in various forms for years, but in my experience they pop out, animals get in them, crapt gets under/through them, and within a couple of years they're just a crooked eyesore that make gutter cleaning that much harder. Are these newest ones actually better? Have you checked under them since installing? No gunk? How do you clean roofing gravel out, or does it really not accumulate?
For the Pets
Those gloves that you pet your dog with and it desheds them. They really do work, and true to the commercial the hair also comes off in one clean pull. My dogs love them too.
Spun Up
I was given a Hurricane Spin Mop. I really liked it. That was years ago. I considered buying another one, but damn, $30 for a mop is a lot. They do work nicely though.
Mops take a lot of abuse, if you buy cheap ones you'll have broken/shredded mops pretty fast. $30 for a mop wouldn't kill me if it lasted multiple years.
Actually that brings me to mine, which isn't infomercial level, but the Swiffer Wetjet is pretty awesome because I don't have to mop anymore at all. My whole house is 120-year-old hardwood. I used to do Murphy's or white vinegar, but dragging a mop bucket up and down stairs every week sucks hardcore. Wetjet gets the floors truly clean, dries super fast, and doesn't involve buckets. I wish they'd make a Murphy's scented Wetjet but that's probably just me.
I'm getting that dog shedder thing. And well... Oxy Clean is a miracle. But that is old news. Maybe I need to be watching more TV at 3am. Or at least set the DVR for the sales. What else is being missed?
Hugs...
The Snuggie was a freaking damned miracle. You can argue that it's just wearing a robe backwards but have you tried that? the arm holes are all wrong.
Damn. I had a Snuggie when I was a teen. I'm 60+. I need to look out for one. It was great for relaxing with a book.
Clogger
Green Gobbler. My bathroom sink was all clogged up and I remembered laughing my butt off to Penguinz0 dubbing over the Green Gobbler commercial. So I figured why not buy some at Home Depot and try it out.
That stuff unclogged my barely functioning sink like nobody's business, my God.
For the Girls
Those little circle things you can use to turn your regular bra into a racer back bra. They're amazing.
Slank Me
I have a Slanket (same concept, different brand) and use it every winter. During the pandemic, I was working from home in a room that gets very cold. I could run a heater, but that tends to just make the room too warm and gives me headaches. I tried a blanket, but couldn't use my hands on the keyboard without opening myself to the cold air.
So I grabbed the Slanket and used that. It kept me warm while I typed away without giving me headaches. If I had a meeting that required video, I simply took out my arms and pulled the Slanket below the camera view.
Of course, now it's getting warm so it's time to put the Slanket away until the cool air returns.
Mince Me
The slap chop. Admittedly, I don't own THE slap chop, I have the pampered chef version, but for mincing garlic or onions it saves a ton of time.
The Snuggie saved my life. I lost it and now I have to re-order as soon as I finish this piece. Trust me, if you haven't Snuggied, you haven't lived. Looks like product sales have stepped it up a bit. I'm watching.
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Anyone who has watched A & E's Hoarders suffers from a distant PTSD. How could we not? That show could make you rethink every life choice. Then along comes Marie Kondo. Remember her? These programs have made us confront the possibility that we may hold onto things we never needed or collect in an access that is at the very least... unhealthy. So let's all discuss what could get us on these shows.
Redditor u/MitaJoey20 wanted everyone to fess up about what they basically hoard by asking... What do you own an obscene amount of?Clothes. I have way too many articles of clothing. I was poor as a kid. I was obese as a teen so I over compensate now. I want options of nice things to wear. There. I said it. And now I have to go pay my storage unit of clothes. Who understands?
Comfies...
Stuffed animals. But I'd be a damn liar if I said that I'm not cozy at night in my stuffed animal kingdom.
Extensions
Useless cables from up to 25 years ago. I have phone chargers older than lots of Redditors. IDE extensions. I don't know why.
I have quite a few of them too! A small box full of IDE and floppy drive cables.
Because my hobby is... Owning an obscene amount of old late 90's, early 2000's computers, and just messing around with the hardware!
By a Hair
Dog hair. That crap in all my belongings.
When our mutt died our vet came in to ask if we would like a pawprint as a keepsake. We said yes. Then she wanted to know if we wanted a lock of his hair as well.
And then in the middle of us bawling our eyes out, we stopped, and laughed for about 10 seconds. Because that dog's hair was all over our house. He, our carpet, and our couch were all the same color, so a lot of it was hidden, but just everywhere. We declined the lock of hair.
$$$
Money.
Exactly how obscene an amount of money were you talking about? Just… profane, or really offensive?
Greens
Plants.
Currently have about... 800?
To be fair, most of it is inventory for my business.
All of this is making sense. And there is never an amount of money that is too obscene to have. I don't get the plants, but I hate plants. Sorry green thumbers.
Love is in the Heel
Shoes because when I was a broke child, my parents never bought me shoes I wanted. Now I am broke adult after buying tons of shoes that never see outside their boxes.
Shoes will always love you. Shoes will never leave you. You can gain 50 pounds and your pants and tops may have to be donated, but your feet will stay the same size. I'm here for shoes because they are here for me.
Cover Up
Make up.
glances at her make up collection yup. I have a 10 drawer craft storage thing. I need another. I have 2 drawers alone just for lipsticks and glosses.
Hey Neo!
Pictures of Keanu Reeves wearing a bra.
And now shoes...
Socks without a match.
Lol in my family we have a generational bin of socks that keeps getting passed down. My mom had one, and when my sister moved she took it with her. My sister has now moved four times and that bin keeps going with her.
I think the odds on finding those lost mates are pretty low at this point.
Gimme Quarters...
Penny stocks.
Penny stocks are fun. I've made a decent bit off of them over the past several years. Still, I generally try and steer people away from them, since the general public is pretty terrible with basic financial tools like checking accounts and credit cards.
There is never enough of Keanu Reeves in our lives. And I still collect pennies. Money is money. But... we really should examine some collection choices. There is such a thing as too many shoes.
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I love money, and I love to spend it. But I also love to be frugal and economic in my spending choices. I am always shocked to see how some people will just throw money about like it's water. (And we shouldn't be wasteful with that either!) Whether you have an abundance of it or not, you might want to rethink a couple of choices. Like ten grand for socks? Really?
Redditor u/Bxtweentheligxts wanted to hear about the most outrageous ways people throw around money by asking... What's the most overpriced item you seen someone actually buy?
In New York City there is a restaurant, I believe it's "Serendipity." It's a city must see and a lifestyle staple. They're famous for their desserts and a special hot cocoa but they also have what is said to be one of the world's "best" ice cream sundaes, that goes for a measly... $1000. Sounds like a steal. From your pocket! And anyone who buys it really should reflect on their life choices.
Chips Away...
I once sold a classmate a bag of chips for $20. I was working a snack sale at school where we sold cups full of chips.
We figured we could get about 20 cups for $1 each out of a bag, so we charged $20 for the bag and she actually bought it. The bag of chips itself couldn't have been worth more than maybe $3 or $4 dollars.
Gamer Way
Gencon is a big board gaming convention in Indianapolis every year. "The 4 best days in gaming!"
One of the booths sell mystery boxes. The most expensive one was like $200, so my friend bought it. It was filled with junk. A crappy Pikachu mug, a couple of anime pictures, a blanket, and a couple of other small decorative statues of characters that we didn't recognize.
Then, he had to carry that huge box all the way around the con for the next 4-5 hours until we went back to the car.
That's been 5-6 years ago and we still give him crap for that.
Speak Up
When I was in 8th grade, I needed a microphone to play with friends online and the school art show was coming up. Parents can bid on certain pieces they like but usually only the best of the best get bids. I put a crappy looking clay mug for a starting bid of $25. Turns out someone bought it... my mom did. Was nice microphone.
OMG Me Too!Â
A lady in front of me in line at Kohl's once paid full price for a shirt.
Last time I bought something at Kohl's they aggressively talked me into buying it on a store credit card for 15% off which I then had to go home and cancel. Now I'm too embarrassed to go back to kohl's because I'm scared they'll just make me get another one.
Yeah see, no. All of those things can be bought on sale or at a bargain store. And champagne at a strip club? How can be just be so willing to spend? It's like an addiction. Let's continue...
You mean Diapers?
Designer underwear for toddlers, i mean really they fit them what 4 weeks? Sure they need 60 bucks a piece panties why not.
There is so much waste and overspending in the market for clothes and accessories for babies and young kids, it's crazy. I got nearly everything for my kid second-hand at a fraction of the price.
Just keep an eye on local classifieds, or family and friends with older kids. My brother has two sons that are older than my kid and my sister-in-law always wanted her kids to have "the best", so my kid has more high-quality hand-me-down clothes than he knows what to do with.
I'll Take a Bud
A $15 Coors light at a festival.
Bwahaha.
I will raise your beer at the ball game with wine at the opera.
I once ordered a glass for now and a glass at intermission with a couple of snacks.
The cashier said $15. I was a little surprised it was that low. Because I am not a fool who would let some student take the fall for an honest mistake, I asked if he was sure. Yep, completely rang it up wrong. $46 dollars later I declare that this is properly inflated prices I was expecting.
Light Catcher
A $15,000 triangular crystal, "sculpture," that would capture light and cast a rainbow on the room.
For Me
My own painting.
One foot square, made in 10 minutes with a palette knife. It started as simply a place to scrape leftover paint off my knife Then I squished a couple blobs of color on it and spread it around improv style. Seriously, 10 minutes tops. When I turned it upside down, it happened to resemble an object/scene.
Apparently it really struck a nerve with someone I know, a visceral response each time he views it. I tried to gift it to him twice, but he insisted on paying $500 for it. It's the highest per-hour income, and highest priced artwork, I've ever made.
It's all so random.
Hammer
In fourth grade, while visiting the local museum, my friend paid $15 for a piece of sandstone with the word "hammer" written on it in marker. It was supposed to be a Native American hammer, but of course it'd just crumble if actually hit against anything.
What have we learned? No matter how much money you have... there is always ways to have more, through thrifty deal making. So much waste on this thread. And never NEVER buy drinks at entertainment venues. Unless you're gonna skip rent that month. LOL
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Living in New York City, I see a lot of things that a lot of people elsewhere might not remotely think about. Things like... pigeons that know to hop onto the train at 14th Street only to disembark at Fulton Street. Things like... grown men fighting in the street over the color of an umbrella. Things like... Subway "showtime" dancers who dropkick other passengers and initiate a fight as we're careening through the tunnel. You know, the usual.
After Redditor True_Madness asked the online community, "What's your 'Well, you don't see that everyday' story?" people told us about the odd, quirky instances they've stumbled upon.
"The second train pulls into the station..."
On vacation in London, my wife and I were waiting for a train in a tube station. Two trains arrived at the station before ours showed up. As a native New Yorker, I was comforted to see that pigeons live in subway stations everywhere.
The first train pulls into the station and the doors open. As people enter and exit the train, one pigeon flutters down from the ceiling, lands on the platform, and calmly walks onto the train like he's off to work or something. My wife and I laugh about this a little as the doors closed and the train pulls away from the station.
The second train pulls into the station, the doors open, and people shuffle out. After a moment a different pigeon walks out of this train and then flutters up to the spot vacated by the first pigeon.
Anyway, seems like London pigeons have the tube pretty much figured out.
See?
What'd I tell you?
THEY KNOW.
"I helped a German guy..."
I helped a German guy at CVS jump his car and to thank me he gave me a fancy bottle of shampoo.
"A big ass old ceramic tub..."
A big old ceramic tub flew off a flatbed truck and exploded into a million pieces on the interstate.
That sounds dangerous.
Beats the silly bouncing logs in Final Destination 2, though.
"While jogging slowly..."
While jogging slowly up a steep hill, I got cheered on by the driver of the Oscar Meyer Wienermobile.
You're not a loser, you're a weiner!
Sorry, couldn't resist.
"I had just pulled out..."
I had just pulled out of my office parking lot when a lady hit my rear passenger side with her SUV as she pulled out of a rail station parking lot. Ugh. So we both pulled over at the Taco Cabana to do the typical fender bender rigamarole, but to my surprise, a pick-up truck followed behind us. I don't think too much of it and get out to exchange info. As I approach her car, I notice she's avoiding my gaze completely. I'm standing there knocking on her window like wtf lady? And then a man gets out of the aforementioned truck.
He demands to know what happened, and why I hit her, to which I retort, excuse me but who are you?! And she hit ME are you joking or are you blind? I'm growing more livid by the second because I just want to go home.
Out of nowhere, a van with a local Mexican restaurant's branding pulls up, and ANOTHER man gets out and starts yelling at the pick-up truck man. They seem to know each other. The woman in the SUV now LOCKS her door (I heard her power locks). I turn back to address the van man and he's arguing with the pick-up truck man. A security guard from the neighboring rail station is walking over and as I'm flagging him over for help, van man HEAD BUTTS pick up truck man. Full on. I'm in total disbelief and now the security guard is frantically running and jumps a hedge of bushes lmao. He comes and breaks up the fight. I'm not sure why but it was only at this point that I feared for my safety but I was also now deeply invested in this drama that was unfolding.
It turns out the woman who hit me was having an affair with the pick-up truck man and they were having a rendezvous at the rail station parking lot. Van man is her husband, and he had just caught them in the act. The worst part is their teenage son was with him. Van man is practically giddy telling me to contact him at all if I need a witness to the accident get my car fixed, presumably so she can get slammed with a hefty fine or premium or whatever.
So yeah, you just don't see a grown man headbutt another grown man in a Taco Cabana parking lot every day.
"A bride in her wedding gown..."
A bride in her wedding gown running in the train station being chased by two women holding the train of her dress.
Paging Julia Roberts...
...is this the sequel to Runaway Bride we've been waiting for?
"I once saw a squirrel..."
I once saw a squirrel carrying an entire pomegranate around a cemetery.
"Watched a guy..."
Watched a guy on a quad drop his hat, look back and decide to leave it behind. About 2 minutes later, some guy in a tan car drives up, swerves around it, stops, leans out of the car, picks up the hat, puts it on, and then just drive away like nothing happened.
"Neutering a dog..."
Neutering a dog the other day, he appeared to be a cryptorchid - that is, one normal testicle, and one not descended, retained somewhere in the abdomen. Well, we can still neuter these - in fact, it's even more important to do so, since the retained one can later develop cancer if left behind - so, into the abdomen I went, looking for that retained testicle, which I was expecting to find somewhere between the kidney and inguinal ring.
Found a uterus.
"I saw a dude..."
I saw a dude absolutely BOMBING a hill on a skateboard, joint in hand, and a crossbow on his back. Not like a little one. Like a medieval reenactment crossbow used for storming the gates of Helms Deep.
If you remain observant...
...you'll see all sorts of interesting things happening. I always seem to find something cool to take notice of.
Have some stories of your own? Feel free to tell us about them in the comments section below!
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