Teachers Share The Worst Cases Of 'My Child Can Do No Wrong' They've Ever Seen
Parenting isn't always easy, but most parents recognize that their kids are going to mess up and need to be taught how to behave. Some, however, have deluded themselves into thinking that their little angel couldn't possibly misbehave or do anything wrong.
These parents can be a nightmare for teachers to deal with because the kids often just need a bit of redirection and some reinforcement of that at home, but the parents aren't willing to see that their kid needs help.
Reddit user u/Will-I-Am_No9 asked:
"Teachers of Reddit, what is the worst case of 'my child can do no wrong' have you seen?"
10.
I had a student in 5th grade. He had a history of misbehavior dating back to the first week of kindergarten. He would regularly shout insults at other students, threaten them, refused to do any work, and on several occasions, yelled at me and once threw a chair. One day, while we were taking a test, this student was talking. I quietly reminded him that it is against the rules to talk during a test, and that he needs to be quiet. He kept talking.
I told him that this is his last warning, and that if he talks again he will need to go in the hall. He talked again. So I told him to go in the hall. He gets up, walks out, and on the way out says, "You're autistic." to me. I wrote him a referral and contacted the parents, explaining the situation. They didn't pick up the phone, so I sent an e mail (oops) and I ended the e mail saying that I hope we can work together to help (student) be successful.
I received a rage-filled e mail back saying that MY behavior is unacceptable, that I am targeting her son and am out to get him, and that I will be hearing from her lawyer. This woman is a cop. She went all the way to the district level to complain about me, and made up all kinds of lies about me and told the other parents.
Oh and once, after a different incident where he physically assaulted another kid, he was suspended for a day. Mommy took him to Disney World.
9.
My first year of teaching I taught early elementary, but had to teach a single grade 7 options class where I saw the students 2x a week for 40 minutes. I had one student who didn't hand in a project and marked him accordingly. Parent-teacher night came and mom shows up. She closes the door, spends 5 minutes addressing her sons marks and asking about whether he could still hand in the project to which I replied "sure". She then spends 20 minutes telling me her son thinks I hate him and how everyone and I mean EVERYONE loves her son. She went on long rambling stories about former teachers, coaches... etc and how everyone really loves him and I just really need to spend some time with him so I would see how special he was.
I finally told her I couldn't possibly hate her child because I barely knew who he was because I spend 98% of my time teaching on the opposite side of the school (not a smart thing to say, but the rambling stories, that we were 25 minutes into what was suppose to be a 10 minute interview, her passive aggressive nature and the fact that she was so high on her son was starting to irritate me.)
I asked her what type of reasonable solution she wanted and she told me my personality was clearly the problem. She then got up to leave but returned to tell me that though she wasn't a teacher and wouldn't tell me how to do my job but... and spent 5 minutes telling me all the ways I'm personally failing her child.
Anyway, that was an important first year teacher moment. Never again would I let a parent treat me like that.
8.
I've wanted to get this off my chest for a while now: Taught previously, but this is as a parent:
Our son, who is 3, is in school. His classmate "Winnie" and her mom "Louisa" are the worst people you've ever met. First, Winnie has a restrictive diet for no other reason than her parents want to try it. They will send a list of "approved" foods and quantities for her with the expectation that all leftovers are to be put in tupperware and given to Winnie to take home. The food is so odd and weird that we wouldn't eat it anyway, but that's the expectation.
If Winnie is at a party, Winnie must win at least 50% of the games, even if there are 20 kids. Winnie must be served first. She must have extra time when playing with children and Winnie must not be, under any circumstances, told what not to do.
The kids of this class have parties and Winnie was invited twice and then not. Her mother flew off the handle and sent a nasty letter to parents about how this was unjust and her Darling Winnifred was crying at being left out. Her daughter has no boundaries, is unruly, rude, difficult and eats what can only be described as pre-vomit. Her mother runs a small "health consulting" business and will constantly try the hard sell with you. It's intrusive, invasive and really tone deaf, but she won't stop continually begging for service. She's awful. Her daughter is awful and they're always at social events.
7.
Once I had a piano student whose mother made him take lessons, even though his heart wasn't in it. For several weeks, he'd come back with exactly the same mistakes as the week before and with no sign of improvement.
I made it comfortable for him to describe weekly practice and his thoughts about taking piano lessons. He said that he had no interest in the piano (or any other instrument) and that he "pretended to practice to get his mother off his back."
I told his mom that forcing him to take lessons was a mistake - that his heart wasn't in it and that it might turn him against music forever to persist. She said, "He's a gifted student and he'd never waste practice time."
I simply said that I have his best interests in mind and that he needs to pursue something he's genuinely interested in, and not be coerced into studying as a result of parental pressure.
The boy gave me an appreciative hug. But his mom looked daggers at me as they walked away.
6.
"We have this kind of meeting every year with his teachers, we know (son's name) can't do multiplication."
He was a freshman in high school in pre-algebra. How he passed 3rd - 8th grade is beyond me besides teachers just passing him to get rid of him. These people had money, they had resources, they could've gotten him tutoring YEARS ago to help him. Instead they preferred we just pass him and excuse his acting out because he refused and couldn't do the work because he didn't have the basic foundation. He couldn't do multiplication so he couldn't do division, and it all spiraled from there. They were so calm about it, like, "What's the problem with that? So what?" I was floored.
5.
I was a TA in a kindergarten classroom and had reminded this little kid (5M) in April (over halfway through the school year) about our rule that we only have healthy snacks at snack time. He started whining and crying about how his mom lets him have cookies whenever he wants.
Anyway, the teacher steps in and mentions that he has a delicious looking apple in his lunch bag. He then gets up, throws a chair and begins to flip tables and tear the class apart while telling the teacher his mom is going to bring a gun and shoot her.
At this moment a threat has been issued so we bring in the principal. She gets there and begins an effort to talk the student down to no avail. He just keeps going on and on about how his mom has a gun and will shoot everyone at the school and if we call the police she is going to shoot them too.
The mother is then called... No answer. Of course.
So we send this kid with the principal and go about our day.
After school is over the teacher, principal and I start putting together an email to the parent. The kid was in after school care so we couldn't have a chat after school. We just hit the major points of defiance and handling his anger in a more positive manner.
I get to school the next day and the teacher shows me the response. The first line read "Why didn't you just let him have the cookie?!" and it went on to say that "you as educators are not doing our job if her child is getting as angry as he is. It is our job to keep him from getting mad and we failed at it today."
That day he came in and told us that mommy bought him a new Lego set...
4.
While I've never been a traditional teacher, I did give swimming lessons for a short time while in high school.
Most of my students (and their parents) were very appreciative of how I conducted my classes, but there was one woman who seemed utterly convinced that I was doing her child a disservice. The boy in question was afraid of putting his head beneath the water – which is a common-enough problem – so we had been slowly working through various ways of helping him overcome that fear. Unfortunately, every single time that his mother was nearby, she would scream about how I had "no right" to "force" her son to do anything, after which she would loudly address him as though nobody else was within earshot.
"Are you okay, honey?" she'd ask. "You remember what Mommy said, okay? You do not listen to that man. You are perfect, and you do not let anyone tell you otherwise! Okay? Tell me that you hear me."
The poor kid would mutter his acknowledgements, then sulk near the edge of the pool until his mother finally left. The good news is that the woman would almost always disappear not long after dropping off her son, leaving me to start undoing the damage. I'd like to think that I still had a positive impact on the boy's life, but something tells me that someone had mistaken swimming lessons for a particularly wet babysitting service.
TL;DR: In which I take on the role of a monster in the pool.
3.
I taught at a school in a mega-affluent community. Colossally wealthy families that lived in castles; very powerful and influential people. Most of the kids were lovely, but there were plenty of brats, and some were just downright unbelievable. It wasn't the kids' fault, mind you - they were just spoiled to the point of being devoid of common sense and reality. One particular boy, who we'll call Francis, had basically given up on school. He knew he was set for life and put zero effort into anything. His grades were so poor at one point that his parents - completely aloof and dependent upon Francis' team of au pairs (Francis called his parents by their first names, mind you) - proposed buying passing grades so that Francis could move on to the next grade. Basically, dad pulled out the checkbook and asked for the amount.
Looooots of Francis stories.
2.
I taught 6th grade at a private school. Since we're private we have a specific testing week every spring to assess our students. I sent home an informative sheet describing the rigid schedule we have and when our tests will be administered. Doors have to remain closed and no disruptions were allowed (a little harsh, but it's what we were told to do by administration). If anyone was late, I assured them they can make the test up, but they would have to wait in the office. This kid asked to go to the bathroom, obviously as a teacher I can't say no.
I told him he had 5 minutes until the test and he will need to be quick. Needless to say, he was not back in time, so he was sent to the office until the testing time was finished. I received a L E N G T H Y email that begun with, "What is your issue with my child?" They never read my weekly newsletters and just believe whatever their child told them when they got home instead of asking the adult for their perspective. He's an only child with a single parent. He's everything to her. I get it, but was a real tough year.
1.
First year teaching, I gave a kid detention. Kid was talking too much in class, wouldn't stop, and school policy was to give detention if a kid acted up after a verbal warning. Detention wasn't much, about 30 minutes after school, but since it was a middle school, giving after school detention means I have to contact the parents, since the kid won't be on the bus (yes, there were other transportation options at this school). Now, he was talking to another kid, so that kid got detention too.
So, throughout the day, the kid is begging me not to give him detention, but I remain firm. He broke the rules, I followed school policy and it's my first year, I'm looking to other teachers to be a guide and they say I should stand firm. So, I call mom.
Mom is totally crazy. The kid is Indian, so she accuses me of racism, but that's not so bad, I can understand where she's coming from. That's not what makes her crazy. She then assumes that there was no way for her boy to be talking in class because he is, and I will remember this quote until the day I die, "a perfect, Christ-like child." Kid was perfect, you see, so anything he did wrong, I had to have made up. Here's the worst part, I was a traveling teacher which means I have to use other classrooms while that teacher is on plan. It sucks for both of us, but it also means, I don't have a classroom phone. If I call a parent, I have to call using my cell phone. She spends the rest of the year harassing me.
Kid gets a B on a test that was written for all of the 7th grade English teachers and done on a scantron? Impossible, he needs to get an A. Kid gets in trouble in another class? Calls me to complain about how he couldn't have done anything wrong. Kid has to do homework in my class? No, that's not acceptable, I'm targeting him. Kid gets detention again? Couldn't have happened, he's perfect. He's Christlike. I had so many 30-40 minute calls from this woman that I had to have the Principal intervene because it turned into harassment.
The worst part was, I really liked the kid. He was a great kid, he was just a 7th grader in a class that had all of his friends and was too big. Also, for some reason, lunch for 7th graders was at 1 pm, which was freaking last for some dumb reason, and his class was the one just before lunch. Kid was hungry, tired, overworked and all of his friends were in class, I totally got it. He just couldn't disrupt class.
Also, when I say "talk in class," I don't mean whispering. He and his friends were pretty loud, they would interrupt me and other kids and, I was a first year teacher, too. Like, I made a lot of mistakes, especially with that class. So, I'm not exactly blameless in this scenario.
People Who Stayed With A Cheater Describe The Aftermath
Reddit user Menezeris3029 asked: 'People who have stayed in a relationship after their partner cheated. How was it like after?'
There are a lot of sayings about human nature that address bad behavior in a relationship.
One such idiom is "a leopard can't change its spots." Another is "once a cheater, always a cheater."
But is that really accurate?
Can a significant other cheat just once and never again? And even if they can, is the relationship ever truly healed?
Reddit user Menezeris3029 asked:
"People who have stayed in a relationship after their partner cheated. How was it like after?"
Projecting And Gaslighting
"It was super short-lived because of the hardcore projecting."
"Because she cheated, she assumed that I was going to cheat with all my women friends. She became super controlling and didn't want me to have any women friends."
"I ended up leaving because my friendships were more important than a broken relationship."
~ Ookimow
"It's in fact so common that people who baselessly accuse others of cheating are almost always cheating and projecting it on their partner."
"Every time I had been cheated on, this is the trigger that made me realize it was going on in the first place and was easily able to find proof."
"They out themselves."
~ PsionicKitten
"My ex husband tried to get me to go to therapy. And don’t get me wrong, I needed it and should have gone, to get the self-worth to leave his a**."
"But my point was, if you won’t stop cheating on me why waste money on therapy lmao‽‽ It’s like sitting in the ER while someone is stabbing you in the back."
"He swore on everything we had he wasn’t cheating on me again."
"Yeah…..he was the whole time."
~ WillBsGirl
Regrets, I Have A Few
"I really truly believed I would rise from it and forgive him, get over it, and come out of it stronger."
"It was never the same. I lost that trust and I couldn’t get it back. And eventually, I stopped caring to want it back."
"It was a 7 year relationship & although I don’t regret it, I sometimes wish I knew to walk out sooner."
"But it made me realize what I really deserve and it led me to the forever man in my life who treats me so well and loves me and honours our commitment."
~ backandforthlosing
"This got me in my soul!"
"My soon to be ex is not violent, he's grown into a lovely man, just not the one for me after what happened."
"I've just cracked my early 30s so I'm calling this my quarter life crisis and moving on...a lot of those things you have said resonated so much!"
~ Puzzleheaded-Ad-9724
"Reasons for not leaving—Fear, isolation, guilt, not wanting to hurt the person you love most in the world, even though they hurt you. Not wanting to lose them."
"It’s hard to let them go, because you have to let go of a part of yourself too and the life you thought you were building together. It is so hard to accept that it was all just an illusion."
"After some time passes, you try to put what happened at the back of your mind as a survival mechanism, and then your partner assumes that you have forgiven them because you no longer appear to be preoccupied with it."
"Sex also complicates things because some cheaters think that resuming sex equals their partner has moved on and are not upset any longer."
"You keep quiet and bottle up emotions to keep the peace, but at a severe detriment to your mental health and well being."
"This is where I am currently with my relationship. I am just trying to get through one day at a time until I gather enough strength to move forward."
"I too hope to wake up one day and say, 'FUK THIS!' I have known about the infidelity since 2021."
~ lunarmantra
Never The Same
"Happened in 2010, part of a mental breakdown on their side. Stood by and watched my world fall apart with a young child to look after."
"I believe in the vows I took when I got married, especially in sickness & in health. 13 years later, still married, perhaps stronger than ever but it still hurts."
"The pain numbs down over time from a glowing ball the size of the sun to a little pin prick of light but it still burns."
"I’m glad we stayed together, child is now a happy and rounded young lady—enjoying the world and her life ahead of her."
"We are now 26 years together so if any of you are reading this, good can come from bad, life does go on, listen to your heart but don’t ever get mugged off."
~ oldskoolplayaR1
"Caught her in an 'emotional' affair early on in our relationship."
"Both her and him told me it was a mistake and he apologized and told me it was over."
"I believed it all."
"However I will admit that it bubbled up during arguments over other issues because of how betrayed I felt."
"It weighed on me to the point where she told me I needed to see a therapist to get over it. I went to 3 of them over a period of the next 4 years."
"We went as a couple maybe a year after that."
"Flash forward another 2 years…I found the texts and pics."
"It never ended and it only grew. The entire time she told me to get counseling. The entire time we were in counseling together."
"The entire time I worked 2 jobs and 7 days a week because she lost her job and took a year off and I picked up the slack."
"You do not recover."
~ justaguylookinghappy
Tick, Tick, Tick...
"A ticking time bomb."
~ Ratakoa
"Yep. We spent a year trying to recover, then had 2 good years..."
"Then he cheated again... I think in the back of my mind I was just waiting the whole time for it to happen again."
~ naturally_eva
"This! Every single day, this is what's in the back of my mind and yup, waiting for it to happen again and hoping, at the same time, that it won't."
~ ahuh_itzme
"Ex wife was the same. We tried again, but she just had to get back in contact with him… lasted ten months, but only eight before she’d started seeing him again."
"It was a 12 year relationship for us, with most of that married. I don’t think she actually stopped seeing him really, looking back."
"When I started seeing a new girl, my ex wife tried to seduce me! Erm, no."
~ CabinetOk4838
"Shoot, mine never even stopped seeing the other guy. She swore up and down she wanted to stay together and it was all a mistake—so I laid out some very simple rules for moving forward, starting with no more contact with the guy."
"She never stopped."
"To this day I dont know what she was thinking. She just kept on trying to see us both. This was a 10 year marriage with kids, too."
"About a year into the divorce, she straight up moved 500 miles away (by herself), became a drug addict, and her entire life fell apart. Got arrested for felony drug possession etc..."
"Most bizarre complete self destruction I've ever seen in real life."
~ alonjar
If They'll Cheat With You...
"One of my buddies dated a girl once that cheated to be with him. Then after awhile she cheated on him too."
"He was so shocked."
"But I was like, bro, she cheated on someone to get with you. Her cheating on you to get with someone else shouldn’t be a surprise."
~ travworld
The Other Side
"That's not always true. I cheated once. It destroyed the person I love, and it sent me into a 2 year spiral of depression and anxiety that I had to be hospitalized for twice."
"I'll NEVER, EVER make that mistake again. People can learn from their past mistakes."
"That being said, 'once a cheater, always a cheater' is true more often than it isn't - and that's quite sad."
"I just won't be one ever again. Absolutely not worth ANY of it."
~ reflUX_cAtalyst
The decision to stay with someone who has broken your trust is an individual one.
Unfortunately, it doesn't seem like there are many happy endings for couples after one partner cheats.
When I was in college, my friends and I went to Starbucks one December night. We had just taken the hardest of our finals and knew we did a terrible job and decided to go to Starbucks to cheer ourselves up.
One of my friends ordered a latte while my other friend and I ordered frappuccinos. The barista got super offended that we would have the audacity to order cold drinks on a cold night. She told us we should be ashamed of ourselves for making her make cold drinks on a cold night. Seriously!
I almost changed my order, but luckily, another barista came over to take care of us. As she put in our orders, she said the original barista we dealt with always judged people's orders and we should just ignore her.
This wasn't the last time we were judged by this barista, but we learned to ignore her opinions.
She is not the only person to get offended by something ridiculous or completely inoffensive. Redditors know this all to well and are eager to share their stories.
It all started when Redditor AdRealistic878 asked:
"What is the most ridiculous thing you've seen someone get offended by?"
A Greeting Is A Greeting...Or Not
"I had a boss get mad at me because when she said "Good morning" I responded with "Hello.""
"She got in my face and said "No.... I said 'Good morning'. Say it back.'"
"I didn't stay there long lol"
– isabelstclairs
"This reminds me of a time I was riding my bike early one morning. I was going up a steep hill, breathing hard, and a jogger running past me down the hill called out "good morning". I just nodded in their direction and continued my slog."
"The jogger stopped and yelled "hey, I said good morning!" I still can't understand the sense of entitlement, that somehow I owe them a verbal return of their greeting despite the obvious circumstances."
– FrightenedOfSpoons
"This reminds me of the first time I went backpacking. I was going up a steep subalpine mountain side on a trail that was basically a ladder made of rocks. I was breathing hard. Two men were coming down and gave a cheery “hello”. I said “hi” all redfaced and out of breath. One of them looked so offended."
– GogoYubari92
Not My Fault!
"When I worked at McDonald’s they discontinued the smartie McFlurry for a short time. When explaining to anyone who ordered one, you’d have thought I threatened their family or something with how offended people were."
– SarcastiKatt
Speak My Language
"I've seen people get very offended by a South Welsh accent. Accusing people of being racist and faking Indian accents when they're just speaking in their native accent."
"The internet is wild."
– Broshida
Freedom Of Speech?
"I was out for lunch with a colleague at a local pub and we were discussing a news story from the morning about a bus crash."
"A woman on a nearby table took great offence to this and stormed over to us and demanded we stop talking about it in public."
"We both just stared at her, not entirely sure if she was serious."
"She was."
"We carried on discussing it and she flounced out."
– ASK_IF_IM_PENGUIN
Just Trying To Help
"I politely and quietly told a woman on line at the pharmacy that the price tag was still hanging on her jacket sleeve. She went on a long loud rant about my bad behavior."
– VosTutZich
"This is why mom taught me Don't talk to strangers."
– UnicornSlayer5000
Spoilers
"I got yelled at for ‘spoiling’ the Tudors. Like my god."
– altdultosaurs
"Imagine being that uneducated that you think someone is "spoiling" the Tudors."
– narniasreal
"Making a joke about Ann Boleyn. Apparently, it was too soon."
"I wish I were joking."
– LadyoftheHounds
"Woah, people are still losing their head over it?"
– SpittinImageofLlama
This Is Nuts!
"Not me, but the Korean Nut Rage incident. The Vice President of Korean Air (daughter of the CEO) was in first class and got furious that she was served nuts (like the peanuts you get on a flight) in a packaged bag rather than a wooden bowl. She made the captain kneel and beg for forgiveness and hit him, then forced the plane to return to the gate since she'd just fired the captain. Crazy stuff."
– FancifulPeaches
Well, Obviously!
"Me growing a beard. According to my brother's mother-in-law, only junkies grow beards, and that's so they can hide their drugs in it. I kid you not!"
– Grunthos_Flatulent
Watch Out!
"I was standing with my trolley waiting & had a lady freak out “You’re going to hit my son!”. I wasn’t even moving so it was a huge overreaction, but I understood that her small son may be hidden from my view behind the trolley & she was making sure he doesn’t get hit when I do move whilst not realising he’s there."
"I looked for him but couldn’t see anything. She continued to freak out at me “Don’t hit my son!” & physically restraining my trolley which is not moving."
"It turned out she meant the adult male next to her scanning things at the self scan till. I wasn’t going to hit him anymore than any fully grown adult in the supermarket."
– stowberry
Don't Lose Your Hair!
"My kid has very curly hair. When said kid was about three years old, a random woman started berating me in public because my kid’s hair was curly. She was convinced I’d had it permed, and how horrible to do that to an innocent 3 year old. I was the worst parent ever. Apparently she’d never seen someone with naturally curly hair before?!"
– Frozen_Feet
Stay Seated
"Being offered a seat on a crowded subway. I offered a woman who was 30 years older than i was my seat . She flew into a tirade yelling nonsense."
– rayneglyons
Talk About An Overreaction!
"I’m a Vet Tech, and people will LOSE THEIR SHIT if you misgender their pets. Jesus Christ. 🤦🏻 The folks who get the most offended are:"
"1. The ones who have chosen to name their male dogs a classically effeminate name."
"2. The ones who have chosen to name their female dogs a classically masculine name."
"Had a guy walk into our animal hospital with his Briard a few weeks ago. Wasn’t a known client/patient, so we asked what the dog’s name was. He responded with “Joy.” Kept talking to the guy about our services when Joy put their paws up on the counter to look at us. I said, “do you have a question, sweet girl?” Dude recoiled like I’d just uppercut his dog through the ceiling and roars, “HE’S a BOY” before dragging the dog out the door in a huff."
– ItsStrib1978
Taylor Swift was right: You need to calm down!
People Divulge Secrets They're Afraid To Tell Their Significant Other
Trust is key to any relationship, whether it's romantic, platonic or even just professional.
But does establishing and maintaining trust require full disclosure at all times?
In professional and platonic relationships, some mystery is understandable. Your friends and especially your coworkers don't need to be all up in your personal life.
But what about a significant other? Is there ever a reason to keep secrets from your sig-o?
Reddit user _Brunonono_ asked:
"What's something you can't tell your partner for fear of upsetting them?'
No Malice Intended
"The first piece of jewelery I bought my wife was a necklace. We went on holiday and she lost it."
"I said I would replace it but it wasn’t the same, she was upset that she’d lost it for sentimental reasons."
"I emailed the hotel and of course they hadn’t found it. So I bought a replacement and told my wife they found it."
~ EnzokuhleLesedi
"My wife has a beautiful heart."
"I jokingly call her a Disney princess because any animal that she comes across she has to talk to, and greet. She has cried by seeing a dead raccoon on the side of the road before."
"At the time, I was working day shift and she was working a swing shift."
"I had a busy day, but I saw she sent me some pictures of a young doe that was eating in our front yard. She seemed thrilled."
"I came home and saw the same deer!"
Giphy"Dead."
"On my god damned porch."
"I felt like I started to hear 'the first 48' theme playing as I realized I have six hours to get rid of this thing before my wife gets home and her world is shattered.
"I call my local city authorities thinking they wouldn’t want a dead animal in the middle of town. Turns out, they couldn’t care less."
"I called some local raptor shelters to see if they could take a stat donation but it turns out the dead deer business is booming and they didn’t have a need for donations at this time, especially in the next 6 hours."
"Frustrated, I call my dad to vent and get advice on what to do."
"His response is only a 'Hold on bud, I’ll be there in 15 minutes'.”
"I go back inside to take care of the dogs and within the next 15 minutes I see me dad back his huge truck into my back yard, has the tail gait down and is knocking on my door with a pair of nitrile gloves on and another pair in hand for me."
"It was starting to get dark out, but we had that thing loaded up and found a special place to, uh... dispose' of it. We made it back with 20 minutes to spare before my wife got home."
"I haven’t told my wife because I think it would either break her heart, or creep her out at how efficiently my dad can dump a body."
"Anyway, wifey thinks her deer friend is alive and well, and totally not at the bottom of a ravine."
~ EliseoJan
Oops!
"The remote didn't disappear."
"I accidentally put it through the washing machine and destoreyed it and threw it out in a panic."
~ NinaBen63
"It was me who cooked with oil and didn’t clean the spatters off the stovetop… not the cat."
~ Poorly-Drawn-Beagle
"I'm impressed your cat can cook."
~ Antillaa
"Well, nothing fancy, not what you'd call a feast."
~ Poorly-Drawn-Beagle
"Just a meowdest meal then."
~ Grunthos_Flatulent
GiphyBetter Left Unsaid
"That she is wayyy more like her mom and sisters than she likes to think."
~ Famannot34
"Could be worse ... my partner is becoming more and more like MY mother than she would like to think!"
~ DeeDee_Z
"That’s definitely one to keep to yourself."
"Forever."
~ msjammies73
"I hate your mom and I'm a little afraid you're going to turn into her, both physically and personality wise."
"Especially since your dad keeps talking about how you have your mom's whole face and personality from back when they first got together."
~ midnightsonofabitch
Giphy"I would like to go somewhere and be alone for a few weeks."
"I love them so much but I have never been on my own in my life and I would like to try it for a minute."
~ PeacefulWarCat
"I daydream/wonder what it would be like to live completely alone."
"How I wouldn’t have to compromise."
~ TA_MHGal
"Lord. I always thought when I met the right one I wouldn’t mind sharing my space."
"I’m a loner by nature."
~ illustriousocelot_
"I only put spiders outside when she sees them."
"If they're only noticed by me I let them continue hunting bugs, sometimes with a few soft words of encouragement."
"You're doing a great job, little guy."
~ c7hu1hu
Giphy"She is using words incorrectly."
"She has a half dozen she routinely misuses and does not want to hear it. Example: The middle of the road is the median, not the medium."
"Drives me insane."
"Married 20+ years. Some things you let go."
"I even tried repeating it back to her in the conversation properly to avoid the conflict. Still doesn't work."
"What is surprising is she easily reads a couple of books per month and is super bright. She just has words that somehow got stuck in her vocabulary along the way."
~ Caspers_Shadow
Is Manipulation So Bad?
"I wanted my husband to quit wearing denim shorts because they made him look old. He had gained a bit of weight, so I kept buying his jorts in his old size 34 and I bought khaki shorts in a 38."
"He will never read a label for any reason. He would put on the jorts and then lay on the bed and lift and spread his legs to stretch out the shorts a bit."
"He blew out the back seam of two pairs in the same day, then ended up putting on the khaki shorts."
"Since then, almost 20 years, he has insisted that khaki shorts are made better and fit more comfortably than denim shorts of the same size."
~ fire_thorn
Hiding In Plain Sight
"Not me but my parents. If my mom wants to hide literally anything from my dad, no matter what it is, she just puts it somewhere where he would have to bend over to see it."
"Doesn't matter if it's something like a package of oreos, if my dad has to bend over to find it he's never going to find it. I've tested it with my own snacks when I was still living with them to confirm it works.
"He'd be mad if he knew how many snacks we'd hidden from him simply because he doesn't bend over low enough to see it in the cabinet."
~ WonderfulFennels
"This is rather hilarious. Not quite what I was thinking of, but hilarious."
~ OP _Brunonono_
"Headline: Man Starves To Death In Home: Couldn't Find Food at Knee Height"
~ Papancasudani
GiphyMight Be Time To Speak Up
"I am tired in my soul."
"I carry the mental load, do 99% of the domestic chores, do the meal planning, grocery shopping, and cooking. I’m the breadwinner and also the one responsible for our finances."
"I’m tired in my heart and soul. You agree when we talk about our future but there’s no execution on your end."
"You see my frustrations and you think it’s postpartum depression but it’s you, not the kiddos. I’ve been doing the therapy and the Zoloft. Why aren’t you?"
~ Beagle_Gal
In almost every case, Redditors' biggest concern was their partner's feelings.
Except for those snacks.
Hopefully they put a few snacks in dad's line of sight.
We've all heard some things that sound too good to be true, but we've also certainly heard some things that were too weird to be true.
But as strange as they might sound, from weird scientific facts to things that people have done to animals that actually exist outside of a distant, mystical realm, there are some things that are simply, stranger than fiction.
Curious about others' takes, Redditor Former_Ladder9969 asked:
"What is a weird fact you know for some reason?"
The Draw of the Deck
"The King of Hearts is the only king without a mustache."
- MR_dizzaster
"He's also sticking a sword in his head."
- Uwumeshu
"He was shaving and missed."
- puneralissimo
Random Facts About Strangers
"Diddy, the music artist, doesn’t like the way towels feel on his skin. So instead of drying off like a normal person after a shower, he walks around his house to air dry instead."
"Why do I know this?"
"Because for some reason, this was a fact given during an old show on VH1 called 'Pop Up Videos,' where they would play a music video with random facts being shown throughout. I have zero idea why of all the vital things I should have stored in my memory, this was one that stuck after all these years."
- dabking24
Spacial Awareness
"Australia is wider than the moon."
- MrSatanachia
"I can't decide if I'm more amazed that the moon is actually way smaller than I imagined, or that Australia is way bigger than I imagined."
- 5Beans6
"This is my confusion, lol (laughing out loud)."
- TheTinyHandsofTRex
That's Commitment
"Crabs have a muscle that enables them to release their claw if they have to."
- Norwegianxrp
"It took me an incredibly long time to realize this means like… fully release it, like remove it from their body. I thought it just meant release the grip they have."
- wowowaoa
Mystical Representation
"The national animal of Scotland is a Unicorn."
- Batmans-dragon80
"Yes, that’s true. Mainly because we have so many of them roaming wild in the glens. Chasing the Haggi and avoiding Nessie."
- Bri1311
Education through Music
"Because of a song that used to constantly play on the radio I have it pretty well memorized that there are 86,400 seconds in the average day."
- Vanilla_Neko
"Because of a song on the radio, I learned that the minimum expectation for displays of love can be measured in 500 miles."
- Slight_Bodybuilder25
Where the Grass is Greener... and Newer
"There were no grasses on the earth when dinosaurs were here."
- Snowfl4ke85
"During the Jurassic and the Early Cretaceous, the higher flora was dominated by cycads, ginkgoes, conifers, and ferns. Other groups of plants included extinct seed plants with fern-like foliage. The exact origins of flowering plants are uncertain, although evidence suggests that they are not closely related to any group of modern non-flowering plants."
"Flowering plants underwent rapid radiation beginning around the middle of the Cretaceous period, and makeup around 90% of living plant species today. With the spread of these plants came the decline of previously dominant groups such as conifers. During the Cretaceous, ferns would also begin to diversify."
"The oldest known fossils of grasses are from the Early Cretaceous, with the family having diversified into modern groups by the end of the Cretaceous. The oldest large flowering trees are known from the Late Cretaceous, with the trunk having a preserved diameter of one-point-eight meters and an estimated height of 50 meters."
- UnexpectedDinoLesson
Weird Way to Say Hello
"Manatees control their buoyancy by farting. Toot toot, floaty sea cow."
- Plane-Vacation-1228
"Wait, so those bubbles you see on the water surface that signify their presence are...?"
- DismalDude77
Goals for Building the Longest Train...
"There's no maximum length to a train, you just add another engine."
- TrueGritt90
"That tracks."
- Snedro
The Smallest Philosopher
"That dead ants produce a pheromone that alerts the other ants that they need to move them to the ant graveyard."
"If a drop of this pheromone is placed on a live ant, it will take itself to the graveyard and stay there until the pheromone dissipates."
- Jessi_L_1324
"The ant: Am I dead?"
- Professional_Stay748
"That ant would make a great philosopher."
- skatalite2020
High-Risk Flights
"Some military helicopters on aircraft carriers are made of magnesium and should they catch fire, it's literally impossible to put them out as the magnesium will take the oxygen from the water and use that to keep burning."
"So the only thing that can be done is to push them overboard and even as they sink they will continue to burn until the magnesium is completely burned up."
- Strange_Stage1311
The First Scapegoat
"Some tribes of ancient people used to tie up a goat, whisper their sins to it, then allow it to 'accidentally' escape so it would carry their sins away and thus resolve them of guilt."
"It was, literally, their 'escape goat,' and that's where the term 'scapegoat' comes from."
- TheAbyssGazesAlso
The Power of Percentages
"Percentages can be reversed."
"For example, five percent of ten is ten percent of five."
- Routine_Leading_4757
"43 years and I'm only learning this now."
- TheMechTech80
Wordy Phobias
"The fear of long words is called 'hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia.'
- Illustrious_Hawk_734
"Also, the fear of palindromes is called 'aibohphobia,' which just goes to show that the people who name phobias are a**holes."
- PhoenixMason13
"The question is, who even has a fear of palindromes?"
- ConduckKing
"Eve, Bob, and Hannah."
- Lostarchitorture
Not only are these facts unexpected, but it's wild to think that some of them are true.
But the simple, plain truth is that the truth is always all that simple. It can be weird and hard to believe, and yet, there it is.