Kids are an entirely different breed when they're at school. Most teachers are quick with a horror story of talking to a parent, trying to explain what Jennifer did today, but the parent is shocked because, "Jennifer never does that at home." Of course she doesn't! That honor is saved special, for her teacher. Now that crazy behavior can be taken to the internet where we can all horrifically marvel at it for forever.
Reddit user, u/nostalgic_joey, wanted teachers to tell it all when they asked:
Stupidly Breaking The LawGiphy
A few years ago a school near where I teach had an epidemic of kids exchanging nudes. From stories that I heard, the kids were trading them like baseball cards and students that didn't participate were harassed until they did.
If I remember correctly, I think the almost the entire football team was kicked off the team
They Started A Whole Page?
These teachers at my school found a kids meme page and keep in mind was a preppy stuck up school. Anyway the meme account had the usually slightly edgy kind of content but the school acted as if it were a hate crime.
Parents were called in. There was a whole school assembly on social media and the appropriate content that should be posted. The school went as far as suspending the kids behind the account for 1 week and giving detentions to every kid who liked the memes. The whole ordeal was just stupid and left me wondering if teachers even cared about the kids who were very clearly smashed on drugs.
Boy Fights: Part 2
Fighting videos. Like I'm talking FIGHTING and teachers in the background watching the whole thing happen without doing a thing to separate it.
Some kids were so ecstatic to show me too what a weird world
A Report Well Done
So, in my school district, teachers can lose their jobs for following students on social media.
That being said, sometimes a student will get worried about something that they see posted and will bring me a screenshot of it. So, due to that, the craziest thing I've ever seen was one of our students pointing a gun at the camera and threatening to turn the walls of the school red with blood.
I took the student who reported it to the front office and made a full report to administration. Never saw the kid who posted that again.
One student created multiple fake facebooks with the names of their classmates. They started a group chat between these fake profiles and would act out dramatic things (someone confessing a crush, someone saying they hated their best friend).
They'd screen shot clips of these fake chats and send it to real people. Real life drama based on the fake drama would erupt in school.
Never Use Work Equipment For Personal Purposes
Not me, but my Fiance used to work the IT department of a school. Sometimes they got reports from students or teachers that suspect there's something on a student's school iPad. All I can say is students, for the love of god please stop taking nudes on school equipment....
We're Just Really Big Fans
I found a fan page for one of the teachers. It included pictures that you could tell were taken without their knowledge (they weren't posed or looking at the camera.) And then the inappropriate comments.
It was so creepy.
Luckily, administration was able to do a little creeping themselves and get to the bottom of it pretty quickly. Within an hour, they had the student and the account was taken down.
It's Always The Quiet Ones
A kid who was calm and was never to loud or anything made a story on his Instagram saying he was gonna kill himself cause me and another teacher where (explective) and so I reported it to the Dean simply because of his health and we'll being factoring in before his other rights. But I was shocked. The dude was never violent or rude just kinda awkward but we were always cool...
You Broke My Heart, Johnny
My star student smoking cracked on Snapchat.
Just Something To Take The Edge Off, Man
I'm a high school science teacher and don't usually add my students on social media but this kid was one of my favorite students so I added him. He is my favorite student because he is always chill and doesn't usually talk in class.
I viewed his story and the reason he was always chill is because he was smoking weed before school, FML
Get That Kindergarten Hustle On
A student showed us a video of another student smoking weed. Both kids were in the 5th grade. Luckily I looped so I was able to give that particular student a little extra support.
Also that same student in Kindergarten brought in little baggies to recess, filled them with grass, and tried selling them to peers on the playground.
"No, I Promise, I'm Totally This Person." - Fake Teacher Account, Probably
Teacher here, I don't follow my students on social media. I don't feel that it is appropriate for teachers and students to have that familiar of a relationship.
We had students creating fake teacher accounts. With outrageous bios. Students would respond with inappropriate comments. It was a mess and took far too long to get those pages removed.
I guess 7th and 8th graders don't have the maturity be on social media.
Wait...Why Is The Teacher Checking Twitter In Class?
Not a teacher, but a girl in my class snuck a picture of a test and posted it on Twitter. It said something like "omg dis test is so hard!!"
And she got called out in front of the class by our teacher for having a phone out during the test
What Else Are You Going To Use A Trophy For?
Am a teacher, was just a volunteer coach for this though.
I saw a student take a shot out something of a small trophy they had won at a speaking competition.
Posted it to snapchat
"Let's Define 'Stalking' Everyone..."
The school I work at had a whole phase where kids made "fan pages" for teachers. On the page was everything from pictures of me teaching to what my car looked like.
After all 20 pages were investigated and taken down, we had an assembly on when it is appropriate to take pictures and what stalking is.
...This Actually Sounds Hilarious
I'm a toddler teacher and recently found out one of my girls has an Instagram.
A two year old girl, posing on top of sports cars, surrounded by jewelry and money. Shes like a mini Instagram model.
Fan Fiction Counts!Giphy
Not exactly social media originally but it definitely ended up there. I teach high school and the students were talking about a middle school student who wrote a novel. It turned out to be an extremely graphic fan fiction of two of the male middle school teachers. The girl that wrote it was in seventh grade. We are talking about full on novel, around 200 pages and 13 chapters. Supposedly it is only book one in the series.
The crazy thing is, my students showed me one paragraph before I knew what it was and it was hands down the best technical writing of any student I have ever had. Again, I teach high school. She was in the seventh grade. Unbelievably well written, and unbelievable a seventh grader was able to describe things with such disturbing detail.
It Can Be Useful To Save Lives
Not me but my wife.
A student posted a suicide note on snap chat. Another student showed it to my wife. She ran to the front office and called 911. Kid was home with his mom and had overdosed in his room. Kid was taken to a hospital and survived. Saved his life.
A Depressing End And Slow Finish
I was teaching 8th grade English in a low income/high crime area. We had one student who was really hard- he was loud, obnoxious, rude and downright mean to most of the staff and other students. For some reason I really liked him and he felt the same. Always respectful to me and often helped me keep the class in line.
The other teachers/students would always make comments about how we will see him up for murder one day and I would stick up for him (he came from a really bad home life most were not fully aware of). Anyway, he friended me on Facebook at the end of the school year and I accepted.
About 4 years later I see an update posted by him (he posted quite a bit) from a couple nights before that simply showed a gun and bullets with the caption "some b-tches are going to pay. Getting my turf back" or something like that. Anyway, long story short he was involved in a drive by and killed a 17 year old kid who was at a rivals party- he was not the intended victim.
Anyway, when the news ran the story and showed his Facebook post as what helped the police find him my blood ran cold. I wish I would have seen the post earlier or could have done something.
He was sentenced to 20 years (since they couldn't prove who pulled the trigger). Still makes me sad- I really thought he would break the cycle of poverty and prison that has run through his family line forever.
If you or someone you know is struggling, you can contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255).
To find help outside the United States, the International Association for Suicide Prevention has resources available at https://www.iasp.info/resources/Crisis_Centres/
One last time. One last meal. How do you choose a last meal?
Let's hope we never have to find out. People on death row get that option.
The menu options are almost endless...
"You're on a death row, you have one hour left, they ask for your final meal - what is it?"
I'd want 2 hours in a Golden Coral with a bar.
Covers it all.
"Everything my mom has ever made."
"I want a nice filet mignon, medium rare, a baked potato with everything on it, and a nice Cabernet from a good year - I'm thinking 2135."
"'Sorry, we couldn't get the Cabernet from 2135. So instead of what could have been a great wine request from a more plausible period of time, you get this crappy stuff we sourced from Wal-Mart. Enjoy your meal, I hope that maintaining your sense of humor was worth it."'
"Something badly cooked so I will be sick and want to die sooner and have diarrhea so bad it will be a last revenge!"
"Taco bell it is!"
"If Taco Bell makes you poop a lot, it's a sign that you probably need more fiber in your diet."
The Yuck Factor
"A huge bowl of baked beans, a bowl of shredded wheat, a six egg omelette, and a gallon of apple cider. I'm gonna make it awful for everyone."
"Save yourself the hassle of eating all that, just ask for one pack of sugar free Haribo gummy bears. Should make for an interesting time for the folks watching you die."
"You void your bowels when you die too so that should be lovely."
"Fried chicken with some Fanta."
Fried chicken is on the top of everyone's list!
"150mg of MDMA. I’m dying happy."
"This should absolutely be allowed. If our leaders insist on the practice of capital punishment then the condemned should be able to ingest any substance they damn please."
"McFlurry. Those machine are always broken. I just bought myself some time."
"Is this like an American thing? I worked at a McDonald's in Denmark once and our machine was never once broken when i was there."
"I saw a video about this once. I'm a little fuzzy on the details but I think it has something to do with the contract that was signed in America. Only one company is allowed to do maintenance on the machines and they basically lock out if it's cleaned incorrectly. It's a crap system."
"Cabbage!! Add some cabbage. I don’t know if an hour if enough to take effect but there was an old coworker on a cabbage diet. Omg she smelled, like it was coming out of her pores. She knew she smelled and kept apologizing and reminding us of the diet."
The OG Always
"Olive Garden. Unlimited soup and breadsticks."
"I saw a sketch once, can't remember who it 2qs from. But a an inmate ordered the all you can eat buffet and had been eating for like 8 years. He's constantly on the toilet and takes micro-naps between bites."
"Unlimited for 1 hour. Cool."
"If my grandma is still alive her potato soup and cheesecake. Hopefully I'd be able to cook said meal with her one last time."
Let's hope none of us has to make this decision.
Most people have friends they've been close to for most of their lives.
But at the same time, friends evolve, and everyone finds themselves losing touch with any number of people they at one point considered their friends over time.
Most of the time, this isn't intentional, but just simply happens.
On rare occasions though, people might realize that their friends were not exactly who they thought they were, and didn't like who they revealed themselves to be.
Redditor One-Refrigerator69 was curious to hear stories of people who realized their friends were not exactly the nicest people to be around, leading them to ask:
"When was the moment you realized that your friends are assholes?"
Compared to others...
"When I started hanging out with better people."- Darklink326
All it took was getting my life together
"When I quit drinking ‘cos it was killing me."
"There were people I literally saw every single day who just disappeared as if by magic."
"12 years ago this week, as it happens."
"I’m not anti-drink, far from it."
"Some people, me included, just can’t enjoy it without it becoming a problem."
"Everyone is different."- bigdaftgeordie
A little perspective goes a long way.
"After I realized that other people don't sh*t on each other on every possible occasion in their circle."
"And that it isn't right when a 'friend' uses every known insecurity as an argument against you when you do not behave the way he/she would want you to."- ViscousPlatemanThe Simpsons GIF by MOODMANGiphy
Lack of respect for other people's things
"I let my friend borrow my ps2 when I went to boot camp."
"When I came back, he said he sold it and gave me $50 I think?"
"This was in 2006."- madmike-86
Lack of mutual respect
"When he does sh*t to me and acts like it’s no big deal, then I do the same back and he gets offended."- Primary-Maybe-2749·
Constantly being taken advantage of.
"They only bothered with me when it suited them."
"I'd rather have nobody than have to deal with that."- zombi33mjhappy eric cartman GIF by South Park Giphy
When they literally revealed themselves to be criminals
"When they robbed me at gunpoint."- Ok_Student8032
When they stopped liking them after a change of situation
"Fourth grade, when my parents economical situation went downhill and suddenly no one invited me to their birthday party."
"Until Seven years later no one had never invited me to their birthday, or to anything at all actually."- Justalittletoserious
Not being able to get a word in...
"When they tell me to shut up when I say anything."- the_golden_cheesela respuesta GIF by Becky GGiphy
Violently playing with emotions
"She got a boyfriend and would let him listen to our phone calls and not tell me, even if I was crying about personal stuff that I would only ever tell her."
"Then they both started lying to me about my crush liking me back, forcing both him and me into awkward positions, telling everyone we liked each other so they'd play along, swapping places constantly to make us sit next to each other, pressuring him into giving me a lap dance, making him kiss the prettiest girl in the room, etc, and encouraged me to shoot my shot more and more."
"All the while they knew he didn't like me, he had told them both directly."
"One night I was crying on the phone cause I was so confused why my advances weren't working, and they just kept explaining it away, blaming some other bullsh*t reason and telling me to try again."
"The next day they told me they were laughing throughout the whole call, because I didn't get it and I was so upset."
"I should add I had no dating experience at all and nobody had ever liked me at this point."- Juliemj
It's always sad when our friends disappoint us.
But when our friends proved to be completely different people than we thought they were, it can be devastating.
As the saying goes, one never truly knows who their friends are.
When visiting any foreign country, one should always be familiar with the laws and customs of the land.
After all, what might be generally accepted on your home turf, might be frowned upon, if not illegal, elsewhere.
For that matter, even locals might need a refresher course on what they can and can't do while at home.
A recent Redditor was curious to hear what tourists and locals alike should avoid doing in the USA, leading them to ask:
"In the United States, what should you never do?"
Stay out of the skies!
"Don't fly a drone in Washington, DC."
"The whole D.C. Area is a no fly zone."
"It's a federal offense."
"Just don't do it."- PeytonCarrK
Cops can't be bribed.
"Don't try to bribe cops when you get pulled over."
"I had some Argentinian friends immediately pull out their wallets and start pooling their cash when they got pulled over once.'
"Fortunately someone in the car noticed and told them to put it away immediately."- PeytonCarrK
"Don't pay off the police."
"My dad has friends from several third-world nations where it is common practice to give the police some cash when you are pulled over."
"However, if you try to bribe a police officer here, you'll get into a lot of trouble."- JohnASmiley
Know your rights.
"Everyone, including foreigners, has the right to be silent and have a lawyer when being questioned."
"Don’t say anything."
"Also, even if you speak English fairly well, ask for an interpreter."- WickedLilThing
Enjoy all that nature has to offer... carefully!
"Don't wander off in the national parks."
"It's very real wilderness and you can get lost and die out there."
"This includes going over railings you aren't supposed to, or off trails."
"People have died accidentally falling into a steam geyser that looked like normal water, mauled by animals or left to the elements."- AlphaOhmeganational parks GIF by Visit The USAGiphy
Allow plenty of time!
"Expect consistency at TSA in airports."- WickedLilThing
Some terminology doesn't translate...
"If you’re from England, they’re called cigarettes here."- Yung_Onions
Make sure your license is up to date.
"If you come from a walkable country don’t come here expecting the same."
"There are some areas with good public transportation and bicycle/pedestrian friendly streets but for the most part, especially outside of cities, the areas are designed to accommodate cars more than anything else."
"The reason a lot of Americans drive everywhere is because, depending on where you live, we have no choice."- The_Cars93Dog Driving GIFGiphy
Wait for instructions.
"Get out of your car and approach the cop when being stopped by a cop unless told to."- hildrash
Whether your'e waling down a street in a foreign country, or the street you've lived on for your entire life, it's always wise to be on guard and aware of your surroundings.
Not to mention, obey the law.
Who doesn't love a good joke?
And one needn't be a professional comedian to always have a joke in their back pocket to make people laugh.
Particularly as there are certain types of jokes which are almost always guaranteed to elicit at least a tiny chuckle.
They could be knock-knock jokes, "little johnny" jokes, and of course the "yo mamma" jokes.
Though always teetering on the boundaries of good taste, the possibilities of jokingly insulting the mother of a friend, or foe, are endless, and more often than not, hilarious.
Redditor nobody-and-68-others was eager to hear the funniest "you mamma" jokes people have ever heard, leading them to ask:
"What are the best “Yo mama” jokes you got?"
Yo mamma's so fat...
"yo mamma so fat she wakes up in sections."- LolCoca
"Yo mama so fat when I had a threesome with her I never met the other guy."- 1nzlocky
"Your mama so fat, her memory foam mattress wish it could forget."- cuirboyFat GIFGiphy
...How fat Is she?
"Yo mama's so fat she outweighs the needs of the many."- BenefitsCustardbatch·
"Yo mama’s so fat that every time she turns around, it’s her birthday."- Amphibutter·
Yo mamma's so ugly...
'Yo mama so ugly, criminals break into her house just to close the curtains."- Cap_the_pro
"Yo mama so ugly your dad wakes up with morning wouldn't."- lukeedbnash
"Yo mama so ugly, her portraits hang themselves."- SolHalcyonthe emperors new groove hangover GIFGiphy
This could have so many meanings...
"The earth was flat until they buried yo mama."- jaymo54
Fat AND Ugly?
"Yo mama so fat, when she goes on a diet, the stock market drops."
"Yo mama so ugly, she threw a boomerang and it refused to come back."- SophisticatedOtaku
Needless to say, not all jokes are to everyone's taste.
Something to keep in mind when sharing these jokes with others.
Particularly with, "yo mamma", or anyone else's...