
Kids are an entirely different breed when they're at school. Most teachers are quick with a horror story of talking to a parent, trying to explain what Jennifer did today, but the parent is shocked because, "Jennifer never does that at home." Of course she doesn't! That honor is saved special, for her teacher. Now that crazy behavior can be taken to the internet where we can all horrifically marvel at it for forever.
Reddit user, u/nostalgic_joey, wanted teachers to tell it all when they asked:
Teachers of reddit, what is the craziest thing you have seen on a students social media?
Stupidly Breaking The Law
A few years ago a school near where I teach had an epidemic of kids exchanging nudes. From stories that I heard, the kids were trading them like baseball cards and students that didn't participate were harassed until they did.
If I remember correctly, I think the almost the entire football team was kicked off the team
They Started A Whole Page?
These teachers at my school found a kids meme page and keep in mind was a preppy stuck up school. Anyway the meme account had the usually slightly edgy kind of content but the school acted as if it were a hate crime.
Parents were called in. There was a whole school assembly on social media and the appropriate content that should be posted. The school went as far as suspending the kids behind the account for 1 week and giving detentions to every kid who liked the memes. The whole ordeal was just stupid and left me wondering if teachers even cared about the kids who were very clearly smashed on drugs.
Boy Fights: Part 2
Fighting videos. Like I'm talking FIGHTING and teachers in the background watching the whole thing happen without doing a thing to separate it.
Some kids were so ecstatic to show me too what a weird world
A Report Well Done
So, in my school district, teachers can lose their jobs for following students on social media.
That being said, sometimes a student will get worried about something that they see posted and will bring me a screenshot of it. So, due to that, the craziest thing I've ever seen was one of our students pointing a gun at the camera and threatening to turn the walls of the school red with blood.
I took the student who reported it to the front office and made a full report to administration. Never saw the kid who posted that again.
FakeBook
One student created multiple fake facebooks with the names of their classmates. They started a group chat between these fake profiles and would act out dramatic things (someone confessing a crush, someone saying they hated their best friend).
They'd screen shot clips of these fake chats and send it to real people. Real life drama based on the fake drama would erupt in school.
Never Use Work Equipment For Personal Purposes
Not me, but my Fiance used to work the IT department of a school. Sometimes they got reports from students or teachers that suspect there's something on a student's school iPad. All I can say is students, for the love of god please stop taking nudes on school equipment....
We're Just Really Big Fans
I found a fan page for one of the teachers. It included pictures that you could tell were taken without their knowledge (they weren't posed or looking at the camera.) And then the inappropriate comments.
It was so creepy.
Luckily, administration was able to do a little creeping themselves and get to the bottom of it pretty quickly. Within an hour, they had the student and the account was taken down.
It's Always The Quiet Ones
A kid who was calm and was never to loud or anything made a story on his Instagram saying he was gonna kill himself cause me and another teacher where (explective) and so I reported it to the Dean simply because of his health and we'll being factoring in before his other rights. But I was shocked. The dude was never violent or rude just kinda awkward but we were always cool...
Just Something To Take The Edge Off, Man
I'm a high school science teacher and don't usually add my students on social media but this kid was one of my favorite students so I added him. He is my favorite student because he is always chill and doesn't usually talk in class.
I viewed his story and the reason he was always chill is because he was smoking weed before school, FML
Get That Kindergarten Hustle On
A student showed us a video of another student smoking weed. Both kids were in the 5th grade. Luckily I looped so I was able to give that particular student a little extra support.
Also that same student in Kindergarten brought in little baggies to recess, filled them with grass, and tried selling them to peers on the playground.
"No, I Promise, I'm Totally This Person." - Fake Teacher Account, Probably
Teacher here, I don't follow my students on social media. I don't feel that it is appropriate for teachers and students to have that familiar of a relationship.
We had students creating fake teacher accounts. With outrageous bios. Students would respond with inappropriate comments. It was a mess and took far too long to get those pages removed.
I guess 7th and 8th graders don't have the maturity be on social media.
Wait...Why Is The Teacher Checking Twitter In Class?
Not a teacher, but a girl in my class snuck a picture of a test and posted it on Twitter. It said something like "omg dis test is so hard!!"
And she got called out in front of the class by our teacher for having a phone out during the test
What Else Are You Going To Use A Trophy For?
Am a teacher, was just a volunteer coach for this though.
I saw a student take a shot out something of a small trophy they had won at a speaking competition.
Posted it to snapchat
"Let's Define 'Stalking' Everyone..."
The school I work at had a whole phase where kids made "fan pages" for teachers. On the page was everything from pictures of me teaching to what my car looked like.
After all 20 pages were investigated and taken down, we had an assembly on when it is appropriate to take pictures and what stalking is.
...This Actually Sounds Hilarious
I'm a toddler teacher and recently found out one of my girls has an Instagram.
A two year old girl, posing on top of sports cars, surrounded by jewelry and money. Shes like a mini Instagram model.
Fan Fiction Counts!
Not exactly social media originally but it definitely ended up there. I teach high school and the students were talking about a middle school student who wrote a novel. It turned out to be an extremely graphic fan fiction of two of the male middle school teachers. The girl that wrote it was in seventh grade. We are talking about full on novel, around 200 pages and 13 chapters. Supposedly it is only book one in the series.
The crazy thing is, my students showed me one paragraph before I knew what it was and it was hands down the best technical writing of any student I have ever had. Again, I teach high school. She was in the seventh grade. Unbelievably well written, and unbelievable a seventh grader was able to describe things with such disturbing detail.
It Can Be Useful To Save Lives
Not me but my wife.
A student posted a suicide note on snap chat. Another student showed it to my wife. She ran to the front office and called 911. Kid was home with his mom and had overdosed in his room. Kid was taken to a hospital and survived. Saved his life.
A Depressing End And Slow Finish
I was teaching 8th grade English in a low income/high crime area. We had one student who was really hard- he was loud, obnoxious, rude and downright mean to most of the staff and other students. For some reason I really liked him and he felt the same. Always respectful to me and often helped me keep the class in line.
The other teachers/students would always make comments about how we will see him up for murder one day and I would stick up for him (he came from a really bad home life most were not fully aware of). Anyway, he friended me on Facebook at the end of the school year and I accepted.
About 4 years later I see an update posted by him (he posted quite a bit) from a couple nights before that simply showed a gun and bullets with the caption "some b-tches are going to pay. Getting my turf back" or something like that. Anyway, long story short he was involved in a drive by and killed a 17 year old kid who was at a rivals party- he was not the intended victim.
Anyway, when the news ran the story and showed his Facebook post as what helped the police find him my blood ran cold. I wish I would have seen the post earlier or could have done something.
He was sentenced to 20 years (since they couldn't prove who pulled the trigger). Still makes me sad- I really thought he would break the cycle of poverty and prison that has run through his family line forever.
If you or someone you know is struggling, you can contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255).
To find help outside the United States, the International Association for Suicide Prevention has resources available at https://www.iasp.info/resources/Crisis_Centres/
Let's get existential ... and argumentative.
Because this is internet, people, why are you acting like you don't know what we're here for?
Reddit user Due_Abrocoma6874 asked:
"What exists, but can't be sensed with our 5 senses?"
Which means what was intended as an exploration into the ephemeral took a sudden detour into semantics city.
Because Reddit is Reddit.
Magnetisim
"Magnetism, extremely powerful (it saves us from the Sun) but you can't tell it's there unless you have something to tell you. I work in a electric motor shop and have to stick my hand in +4,000 horse power motors with dummy rotors to test them. I'm probably shooting blanks now, my 2nd answer, infertility."
- Padmei
"I think you're confusing the effects of ionizing radiation with magnetism. Strong magnetic fields have absolutely no effects on humans; MRIs are a perfect example. However, working with radioactive materials or near x-ray sources can kill irreplaceable cells in the reproductive organs of both sexes."
- Jenyweny09
"Hence the burning question, 'F*cking Magnets, How Do They Work??' "
- saruin
"Interesting job, bad answer."
"Look I'm not a 'magnestist' here, just an electrician which I guess could be one of the next closest jobs. But thats like saying you can't use any of our senses to sense gravity."
"Ever seen an object get affected by a magnet? That's sensing magnetism through our sense of 'sight'. Ever held something near a magnet - or even a magnet itself since you can feel the repllent aspect of the force as well? That is sensing magnetism through our sense of 'touch'."
"When anyone cops a belt (sparky for an electric shock) whether it be licking a 9v battery, touching live 240v conductors or even getting struck by lightning; we are feeling the electromagnetically energised positive protons and negative electrons trying to balance themselves out. We literally feel our body experience magnetism."
"Hahaha I did have a laugh at your second answer though that's probably true"
- sheppo42
"Actually, both of those are the effects of magnetism. We can't sense magnetic force, just what it causes."
- Mori_564
It's Technically Hearing, But We Get It.
"The difference between an awkward silence and regular silence"
- Jeutnarg
"YES! Have a freebie!"
- Sticketoo_DaMan
"I choose not to ever consider silence to be awkward silence and i encourage others to do the same. Yeah it's some corny sigma male sh*t but it's really made my conversations more enjoyable"
- maxverstrappin
"Once knew a guy who was having difficulties with a co-worker. HR finally just told them not to talk to each other. A week later HR spoke to him because the other guy whined about him being 'aggressively silent'. Like wtf?"
- II_Confused
"bro speaking facts"
- holdupdindindindin
"It is a regular silence until you mention the silence. Then it is an awkward silence."
- nellucd
Getting Metaphysical
"Most of reality."
- hydraxl
"And yet some brilliant humans have been able to make many of the insensible things visible through their inventions. It’s incredible how many things are known even when we’re unable to detect it without devices."
- TheYeti4815162342
"I thought this was a dark matter reference at first."
"Most of the universe is dark matter, but we can't see it, touch it, smell it, or interact with it in any way with our senses."
- stevey_frac
"This is perhaps the best and, simultaneously, most frightening answer."
"If we had 10 more senses and 1000 more IQ points we still wouldn't be able to experience even a fraction of reality."
- pezdal
"This 100%."
"Here's a rough list of things that are currently all around you but you don't know is there:"
"Countless air molecules such as oxygen, carbon dioxide, and nitrogen"
"Light (EM spectrum) outside of our range. Radio signals from cell phones, routers, towers, planes, etc. Xrays and gamma rays from upper atmosphere particle interactions and distant stars."
" Billions and billions of neutrinos produced by the sun that penetrate the earth (and your body of course)."
" Radioactive emissions from various natural decaying elements including Carbon"
"14 found in pretty much anything with Carbon (such as your body). Also Potassium such as in Bananas."
" Billions of bacteria and viruses all over everything."
" That Klingon Warbird decloaking off starboard!"
- salbris
Radiation
"Nuclear radiation, plus neutrinos - they go right through us."
- Ghostforever7
"Apparently it tastes like metal when there is a lot of radiation tho"
- luminaxed
"Astronauts said they could see flashes of light through their closed eyelids, so not all radiation"
"But I do agree with neutrinos"
- FrankMiner2949er
"Technically you could sense neutrinos since they could hypothetically interact with the liquid inside your eyes, but that happens so rarely and our eyes are so small that statistically it will never happen for anyone ever."
- Moikle
You Have To Imagine The Flavor
"The different flavors of La Croix."
- Tantra_Charbelcher
"La Croix flavors aren’t real, you read the can or see the color and it tricks your brain into thinking there is a flavor. I’m convinced this is true and nothing anyone says can change my mind."
- megapuffranger
"Wait... La Croix has flavors? I thought it was just different can colors"
- Tips__
"Ha! I have a buddy that always said La Croix is like drinking sparkling water while someone on the other end of the house whispers the word grapefruit."
- mrausgor
"It tastes like TV static"
- chealey21
Tricky Brain
"Magenta. Your brain makes it up"
- TrulyTynixo
"I'll take it if seeing it as grey is the only alternative."
"Crap how many things that we perceive as grey are actually exciting colours? I know certain birds, insects and marine life can see a wider scope of colours than we can."
- Chromattix
"I am so confused. I know exactly what magenta is but I googled it and there are no wavelengths? Is life a lie?"
- K_Xanthe
"Technically your brain makes up all colors and sight. I think what you are saying though is that there isn't a specific wavelength range that the brain directly converts to magenta. Actually now that I think of it, I'm not sure what that weird fact is about. I'll have to read more about it."
- c_c_c_c_c_c_d
"Even crazier than Magenta are the impossible colors which can only be perceived temporarily via an optical illusion."
" 'Stygian Blue' is a shade of blue that's darker than black."
" 'Hyperbolic Orange' is a shade of orange that's even more orange than orange."
"The 'self luminous' colors look like brighter-than-white glowing pastels."
"They're kind of trippy."
- Cybyss
Gasses
"Carbon monoxide. Unless dying counts as a sense."
- Rampant_baconator
"All gasses except for CO2 are undetectable to the human body. Not just CO"
- Rotor_Tiller
"Even CO2 is undetectable. It has the EXACT SAME symptoms as every other gas. An impending sense of doom, hallucinations(usually scary and violent) and finally random bouts of unconsciousness getting worse as the volume increases but thats hypoxia as well so..."
- MutedAd7206
"What I mean is that CO2 is the pretty much the only gas that the lungs evolved specifically to reject. A lung full of CO2 is always going to burn and generally feel suffocating although I don't have enough experience with colder co2 vapors to know what those might feel like."
- Rotor_Tiller
"If it's a lung of PURE CO2 yeah but in the toxic level you won't notice it cause it's not lethal."
- MutedAd7206
"Why is this so far down on the list?"
- alleghenysinger
I Got A Feeling Somebody's Watching Me
"When you’re being watched. You can’t hear, see, touch, taste or smell who or what is watching you. You just kinda… know 👁👁"
- Tobester2005
"I've heard that your peripheral vision is exceedingly good at detecting eyes. It doesn't tell you exactly where but it alerts that 'being watched' feeling. Technically still sight."
- Spyblox007
"Typically, the reason for this is because your brain has picked up on something that isnt quite right, wether its silence, or the absence of something thats usually there, but most times, you can't tell what that thing is, but you know something isnt right"
- helpmylifeis_a_mess
"My buddy went hiking on Vancouver Island a few years ago and told me he had that exact feeling directly behind him. Turned around and a mountain lion was staring at him from a distance."
- eddieswiss
"You can you just don't know you can. You as a being are too focused on random bullshit than on surviving its why we have a part of the brain DEDICATED TO THREAT DETECTION. It's called your subconscious or Instincts. Instincts are useful because they give you that gut feeling and deal with your reflexes. If you've ever gotten into a fight and grabbed a rock or something without thinking about it it was Instincts. If you've ever felt paranoid or afraid of the dark despite being 30 years old and having gotten over it that's Instincts. If you've ever looked at a ledge and thought about jumping off that's Instincts telling you have terrifyingly bad an idea that is(something to do with monkey brain and judging distances you can fall from safely)"
- MutedAd7206
Existential Question
"Depends what you mean by "sensed". If I look at a video feed from a satellite at the far end of the Moon, am I seeing the far end of the Moon? If I look at a picture of distant galaxies imaged in infrared, watch a vapor trail in a particles experiment, listen to a sonification of data, feel a building tremble in an earthquake, do I sense these existing things?"
"What is allowed to be between myself and the existing 'thing', to still call it sensing? Do the instruments have to be part of my body? What about glasses? Implanted lenses? Hearing aids? Skin grafts?"
"Regardless of your answer, the only thing I would say with some certainty exists, but cannot be sensed, is the future (some future) because the laws of physics forbid time travel in that direction.."
- grismar-net
"I would argue that time in that sense doesn’t even really count as existing. It’s more of an abstraction or summary of the interaction between existent things in space (spacetime would be a better way to think about it)."
"Not one thing can be said to exist without the claim being dependent on the senses."
-
Not Your Typical Wave
"Most radio waves"
- brock_lee
"More like the entire electromagnetic spectrum apart from visible light and infrared."
- Mems1900
"Up to a certain amplitude but eventually … cooked 😂"
- CutAccording7289
"Most light aka most of the electromagnetic spectrum. In fact we can't sense any radio waves at all, not with our human senses anyway, as the OP asked."
- c_c_c_c_c_c_d
"I was going to say WiFi, but that is also an electromagnet wave."
- met3_1
Now that you've argued your way through some Redditors thoughts, let's argue more in the comments.
What do you know exists even though you can't exactly perceive it?
Life is full of boring things.
Life is full of uninteresting things.
So... if life full?
That's a question for another time.
Let's focus on the things that leave us bored to tears.
Or numb with no feeling at all.
You ever wonder how people get so super involved and jazzed about some stuff and you look at it and all you can do is yawn?
That's our topic.
Redditorroscatorossowanted to hear about what things we all can live without.
They asked:
"What's something you have ZERO interest in?"
I have a long list of having zero interest in things. Give me a few more points.
Auto Issues
"Extending my car’s warranty."
reddittothegrave
"We have messaged you about your car's extended warranty."
Ashamed-Help-6662
Potions
"Herbalife."
meskal1L
"All pyramid schemes should get stuffed."
I_AM_FERROUS_MAN
"At one point my boss was hocking Herbalife and young living essential oils on the side of the business, it was a blast trying to take a sick day because she had the cure for everything."
mediumlowpriority
Never Again
"Commercial advertisements interrupting what I’m doing."
NimrodvanHall
"Let's talk about commercial ads in cinemas. I stopped going to a certain cinema (The Space chain, in Italy) for this reason. Tickets are more expensive than the family owned cinema, and before the movie starts you have at least 30 minutes of ads."
"Unless you book online, they don't allow you in if the 'movie' has started. Online bookers can go in until 30 minutes after the booked time. For some reason, my friends love it. I deeply hate it. People usually run out of popcorn before the movie starts. The last time I went there, I paid 12.50€ for a movie that had to start at 22:30, and it started at 23:20. Never again."
Liscetta
Tasks
"Raid shadow legends."
aintshockedbyyou
"I did actually download it. Played it for like 5 minutes, there was very little in the way of strategy or anything and it kept giving me new 'tasks.' Eventually I discovered a 'Auto fight' button that would literally play the game for you requiring 0 input from you. I uninstalled it."
Crackracket
Idiots
"Shows about d**chebags dating on some island."
Kramer1812
I still can't believe people get invested in those shows.
Blah Blah
"Literally whatever my neighbor wants to talk about, everyday."
maketes
Who Cares?
"Gender reveal parties. We're gonna find out soon enough."
NO_Cheeto_in_Chief
"Somebody I worked with had a cringy one of these at our team meeting, after talking shop about very serious issues in suits and ties etc. At the end my manager was like 'ok so now we have a special moment where Nadine is going to reveal to us the gender of her baby.' She got up excitedly in front revealing a big box covered in glitter and s**t, slowly cut a ribbon and balloon popped out with 'it's a boy' on it. We just all sat there and awkwardly clapped like we cared."
keepYourMonkey
They're Nobody
"Praising and defending corrupt politicians like a freaking God."
Hefty-Mistake-4290
"Corrupt politicians, more like ANY politician. I find it so strange seeing people idolise and put their political leaders on these untouchable pedestals while they crap on them, none of them care about anything other than their agenda and their wallets."
callumpenman00
Enough
"I've recently been seeing a clickbait on my social media that says, 'Did Anne Frank have white privilege? The internet is up in arms...' or something like that. I cannot even describe the feeling of shut the heeeeellll up, and total exhaustion that that question gives me."
Particular_Rav
Not a Thing
"Celebrities/ Influencer Culture."
MisterD90x
"I really hate the term 'influencer.' It just sounds so pompous and is mostly only used by people who want to feel more relevant than they actually are."
CC_Keyes
I have less than zero interest in all of this.
The times do change fast don't they? Everything we think we'll know about the future is usually false.
How much of history is littered with things we thought we'd never be able to do without?
Now we watch movies in our palms. (Instead of theaters.) We send millions of dollars through the air. (Instead of withdrawing in person, or a check.) And we no longer need pennies. (Basically)
Who would have thought?
These were all going to be life essentials.
But generation by generation, the obsolescence takes over.
RedditorVictorPumpensteinwanted to talk about what truths were hidden until it was too late for each group as we aged.
They asked:
"What is the biggest lie sold to your generation?"
Beepers. I was told my beeper would be forever. Alas...
You Still Here?
"Gen X-er here... we were told that the boomers would eventually retire. Still waiting for that to happen while rapidly approaching retirement age myself."
drsfmd
JOHNNY!!
"Don’t act up in class Johnny, It will go on your PERMANENT RECORD!!"
ThePracticalDad
"I worked in records for a public school board many years ago. The only thing colleges ever requested was transcripts and IEPs if a student had one. However, the police would request full disciplinary records of someone was going to be hired. And unless a student had a disciplinary hearing at some point, most records other than transcripts are destroyed after 7 years."
War Over
"The war on drugs."
2003gts
"Poverty and terror won theirs, too. Turns out, declaring war on a concept without attacking the societal roots of the problem is just a way to funnel more money into the military-industrial complex."
MrVeazey
"Shout out to pharmaceutical companies for winning the war on drugs."
Responsible_Tell1589
instead of cardboard...
"Plastic recycling. I remember when grocery stores went from paper bags to plastic because 'they're recyclable!' Literally everything else started coming wrapped in a ton of plastic (instead of cardboard) because it was recyclable. Single use plastics were great, because we'd just recycle the plastic, and use it forever! Turns out, it was just cheaper, and recycling had nothing to do with it. Most of that plastic can't be recycled anyway."
DifficultMinute
Food Contents
"Fat is bad, sugar is good."
Thesorus
"This is why America has an obesity epidemic. Even now, older generations tout the health benefits of low fat things, without bothering to look at sugar contents. High sugar processed foods that happen to be low in fat destroyed multiple generations. Thankfully I think Gen Z might be the turnaround. Older generations are pretty messed up."
Bulky_Consideration
Unprotected
"Medicare and social security will protect you. Based on how things are going, anyone with 30 years or more before retirement better have strong backup plans."
iteraco
Oh Medicare and social security. What. A. Disaster. We are in trouble.
Just Type
"You will always have to write in cursive."
hakuna_matitties
"I hated those cursive books and being 10 and still couldn't figure it out. My sister a year behind me never had to write cursive. I firmly believe my year was the last year to deal with cursive. This was back in 2012-2013."
chonketteseal
It's Broken
"Climb the corporate ladder."
UKS1977
"It's not a ladder, it's a pyramid. Only one person can be CEO, a handful can be executives, a bigger clump can be in some form of middle management, but the majority will always be 'individual contributors' - what an amazingly corporate term."
"You're often better off with an in-demand skill set that you can shop from company to company. Unless you enjoy fighting and scrabbling and climbing over people to keep getting promoted. Sure, you may have crappy bosses, but even the CEO has to go in front of the board and be told everything that's going wrong."
towerdweller
I'm Good
“If you don’t go to college, you’ll die broke and alone on the street.”
googlyeyes183
"I wish i hadn't been pushed so hard to go to Uni at 18. I wasn't ready yet and i didn't know what I wanted to do with my life yet. Asking a 16 year old what degree and vocation he wants is just a bad way of doing it!"
Relentless_Fiend
"My principal in high school was upset at me because I wasn't going to college. He told me multiple times that if I don't, then I am just throwing away my intelligence. I never went to college because it just sounded miserable and expensive. I worked a few different jobs after high school and learned a lot then started my own business. Glad I never went to college."
acetamethemphetamine
Not True
"Work hard for your company and they will take care of you."
"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!"
whatintheactualfeth
So much changes over each generation. How will we ever learn?
In this day and age of sexual freedom and experimentation, why would you cheat?
It makes absolutely no sense.
Unless, the act itself is part of the fun.
No matter your decision, let's pinpoint the moment we know we're heading down that path.
Everybody can name the times you feel it in your gut.
You know it's crossed a line.
Now what?
Redditorcrabpinchingmyanuswanted to hear about the moments when we all begin to fall short of fidelity.
They asked:
"Redditors, where does cheating in a relationship start for you?"
You always know when it's wrong. At least I always did. That's why is called cheating.
Plotting
"The sneaking around. The second you start plotting to do something behind my back. You're violating the trust of the relationship."
Warkitz
Intent
"Honestly it's about intentions more than anything. If my SO started pursuing someone romantically that's cheating - doesn't matter if it's lovey dovey texting or f**king. If my SO was at a party and a drunk person kissed him suddenly against his wishes, that's not cheating."
"At the end of the day it comes down to them wanting to be with another person and they aren't being honest about it. The polite thing to do, even though it's painful and hard and sad, is to break up. Breaking up is never crappier than cheating."
NowHeres_HumanMusic
Tests
"If you would be unwilling to tell your partner about an interaction, then it's probably time to start thinking about what you're doing."
Teafairy6767
"Yeah I think the two basic litmus tests are..."
"1- Would you tell them/do it in front of them?"
"2- Would you be okay with it if they did the same thing?"
"If the answer is yes to both, it’s probably fine. If it’s no to either, then at minimum you’re on dangerous ground."
audigex
Off Limits
"It depends on what each couple would consider to be off limits. A good guide is if you're doing something you would hide from your partner or wouldn't do it if they were in the room with you, then that's cheating. It can range from having sex with someone else, to simply flirting."
j_neutrus
Omissions
"Lies. It always starts with lies. Be it texts or snaps, if one of us have to lie or hide, it's wrong and should not happen."
notyourusuallady
It's always a lie in the beginning. Don't lie... it's a Commandment.
Upon Reflection
"If you wouldn't want your partner to know, it's cheating. I wouldn't flirt with someone else in front of my partner, so I don't flirt with people when he's not around either."
kellogg888
actions/feelings/thoughts
"As cheesy as it sounds, it starts with your motive, intention, and conscience. I think there's a clear cut difference between physical cheating and mental/emotional cheating, but it all relates to your honest motive, intention, and conscience. For example, there isn't anything inherently wrong with texting with another person if you are married or dating."
"But if you know in your heart that you are texting or engaging in conversation that makes you feel guilty or it would make your partner upset, you may be doing something wrong, even if you technically did not cheat. If at any point you are justifying your actions or defending your actions/feelings/thoughts from a technical perspective, you may be at the start of doing something wrong."
orange_cuse
That's cheating...
"Cheating starts at lying, even by omission. I am okay with private conversations, meeting people she wants to meet, going away on business trips or going out and coming back late at night. But lying to me about it or about what happened? Or simply not telling me something I don't want to hear? That's cheating."
"So..."
"'I will go out tonight, to see people you don't know and talk about things you don't care about': we are in the clear, it is fine."
"'I saw X and Y last night at their place': if I know for sure that it is not true, then there is some cheating involved."
"It only works if you are not a creep, or even jealous. There needs to be mutual trust and respect. When trust and respect are gone, the relationship is gone too."
pleasedontPM
Happy Birthday
"The intent. For me, an ex of mine that would later cheat on me started a tinder profile in which she claimed she "just wanted to find friends" and she certainly found quite a few of them. Obviously, she didn't just want friends. It could be as small as reaching out to an ex to say happy birthday, but most people have the intent to do something well before it is executed."
isnoe
The Grey
"If there’s a grey area, it’s cheating. If you know they will be upset, it’s cheating. If you have to hide it/lie/omit details. It’s cheating."
SufficientBug5598
There is never a good reason to cheat. Once you know it's starting... fess up.