Teachers Break Down Their Funniest 'Your Parents Clearly Did The Assignment' Experience
Teachers have seen it all: horrifying bullies, brutal hygiene practices, sudden tragedy, the soaring highs and crashing lows of teenage love.
Even a short career could cover each of those a few times.
And yet there is another characteristic teacher moment that seems to dominate more and more, particularly in recent times. It is, of course, the regular run-ins with overbearing parents.
Often called helicopter, or even snowplow parents, these are the pressure packing driving force behind so many students from high school all the way down to elementary school.
These parents want success for their child at any cost and always. Anything less, as their logic would suggest, would initiate a calamitous chain reaction that would end in the utter downfall of the rest of that child's entire life.
This severe parent energy is expressed in many ways, both direct and indirect. One of the most common, however, is through help on homework assignments.
When a parent steps way too far in to help complete their child's project, it's obvious and frustrating for the teacher. Some of Reddit's teachers shared their favorite experiences.
scsm asked, "Teachers of reddit, what was the most obvious, 'your parents clearly did the assignment?'"
The Ideal Assignment
"I taught elementary art classes for a few years, and a lot of time would have crossover lessons with certain subjects."
"One year we had the second graders do a project for their unit on Native Americans, where they had to make dioramas of a type of Native American house of their choosing, and then write a little two paragraph essay on who lived in that style of house and why it was built that way."
"Most kids made Tipis or wigwams out of construction paper and birch bark and paper towel rolls. we had a few kids who were clearly getting help from their parents, but it was obvious the kid had input and done the essay. Standard stuff."
"Then we had a kid come in with, I sh** you not, a completely accurate model of Cliff Palace, Colorado. It was stunning."
"Turns out, his dad was a sculptor, and his mom worked at our local museum, as a restoration expert."
-- fluxy2535
Forging Ahead for Success
"Penmanship - no kidding, kid had the maid write it." -- neoldguy
"When I was a babysitter in junior high/high school, I would promise the kid I was babysitting after school that if he did more than half of his math homework, I would do the rest if he went to bed on time."
"I made sure to write exactly like him (holding the pencil awkwardly) and get enough wrong that it wouldn't be obvious."
"I know it was wrong BUT I just wanted an hour to myself to watch TV!!" -- Spasay
When Even the Kid is Upset
"When the student came in crying while holding the project and when asked what happened she announced that she was frustrated that her mom did the whole project, it looked nothing like how she wanted it to, and wasn't allowed to really do anything on it."
"This wasn't the first assignment that came in from this student that was clearly done by the mum but the student finally had had enough of having her education taken from her."
-- LucJenson
Last Hurrah
"6th grade research project that ended in a 3 page paper. One kid turned in a 10 page paper. And it definitely wasn't a bad attempt at plagiarism."
"It kind of felt like the mom was missing her own academic years."
The Plot Thickens
"This discovery was a collaboration between me and another teacher."
"The student in question submitted an assignment that showed no cohesion or ability to connect ideas (Told me about how to 'make' detergent from kiwi fruit in 500 words, the task was a 1500 word assignment on a DNA extraction experiment)..."
"...and then the same week submitted an A standard assignment to their psychology teacher with excellent flow, arguments and great conceptual synthesis."
-- Adonis0
Collage
"English as a foreign language teacher here. During lockdown last year a student sent in a test that had much better work than he usually did."
"When I googled his words, sure enough, he had copied it by mashing the first part of sentences from one source to the second part of sentences from another source. It did at least make sense, but it was still not his work."
"When I confronted him about cheating he said 'I don't think I cheated, cause my mom helped me with it and she wouldn't cheat!'" -- NonCaelo
That Craftsmanship
"12-year-old kid brings in a BEAUTIFUL galleon. All the other kids' galleons look like they are cut out of styrofoam using a butter knife, or some kind of strange 50/50 amalgamation of cardboard and hot glue..."
"...and then there's this kid with a wooden galleon, complete with rigging, cloth sails, a stand...after talking to him I finally get him to admit that his parents had gone to a shop and ordered a custom-made ship."
"What the heck?!?"
-- schoonerw
A Shining Example
"Not a teacher but in middle school I procrastinated as most kids do and forgot about project to make a brochure about a country. My parents stayed up all night helping me (doing the majority of it)."
"Years later underclassmen would tell me that same teacher would pull my project out every year and tell them what hard work looks like."
-- dahopppa
Jury's Still Out
"Middle school science project, kid came in with a crude internal combustion engine, having previously failed science three quarters in a row." -- Emperor_Cartagia
"I think some people are just naturally good at this stuff though."
"I had a friend growing up who got horrible grades and was in trouble all the time at school."
"He would ask for me to come play with his go cart at their house and I always had to tell him no because to him playing with the go cart was taking it apart and putting it back together again. I wanted to drive the thing."
"He ended up failing out of high school and went on to a trade school and did much better." -- tc3590
Worst of Both Worlds
"As a student, I remember in woodworking that we have to make a foldable chair that we have to work on the whole sem. In the end mine was a f***ing safety hazard aka it can be sit upon but there's like nails ready to skewer your a**."
"Scared to submit that i literally bought new materials outside class and let my dad do it. Teacher was shocked on how good it was and question my authenticity."
"In the end i confessed that it was my dad but my teacher's ego was so high probably thinking he can humiliate me in front of class so he told me to bring the 'original chair.' He sat on it and punctured his a** and fell because the chair did not support hos weight."
"I got suspended not because i hurt him but because i was cheating lmao"
-- joe_nard_vee
The Jig is Up
"We were in quarantine for the final quarter of the year. I had a student transfer to my roster the first day of it. He completed all of his assignments and got 100s on all tests."
"I got him again this year. Kid can barely read, can't form a grammatically correct sentence and accomplishes nearly nothing."
Missing the Point
"Every year I assign a problem the first day of Calculus to understand how the students handle stress, complete work, and their skill level. If an Engineer sees it they will solve it using material the students don't understand."
"Last year I got a new record of Engineers doing their children's homework. I also got an angry email from a parent (MS in CS from MIT) saying I shouldn't start with CALC III."
"I completed the problem and cited my sources in a Precalculus book."
"He then tried to hack my website with their homework problems. It also took him two days to write 5 lines of python for his daughter's homework."
"He's the head of the coding division for an aerospace company. He had a blog post about how over coming obstacles leads to growth. I hope his daughter gets to leave when she is 18 and find out who she really is."
-- TheNatureBoy
Hired Hand
"Pretty easy to tell in art class. One day the student can't draw a square properly and the next day he comes in with a perfectly rendered 3 dimensional still life with depth and shading."
"Separate incident, and even more egregious, a girl didn't even hand in a year end project herself. She spent many classes refusing to do any work in class."
"Then after the project is due, someone else I've never seen comes by with an amazing drawing and said that the student drew this and wants to submit it. Ummmm.... how stupid do you think I am?"
A Thankless Effort
"I don't have one of these, but I have the opposite."
"One time I had a project where I had to make a miniature 'wattle and daub' wall in primary school. I knew how it was meant to work, and 'how' to do it, but for the life of me I couldn't get it to work."
"So my stepdad tried to help me. We spent hours trying to get it to work, and failed miserably, but in the end I had something to take to class."
"Teacher said I obviously hadn't spent any time trying to do it and failed me for the assignment."
-- Musashi10000
Only Half the Battle
"A school chum mine once 'wrote' a perfect, amazing, compelling story for a French creative writing class. Only problem was they couldn't read it."
"Her mother had been forcing their au pair to do all of the friend's homework and the email to her. The mother never realized the friend knew zero French (because she wasn't actually learning it!) We were in boarding school."
"The French au pair took care of Friend's little brother back home. She had never met Friend and assumed Friend could read it."
"Friend's report is infamous for how awful it was to have heard. I felt both terrible for her and impressed that no one had caught her before this report."
Take Your Dad's Esoteric Weapons to School Day
"Not a teacher. I was the student. Senior English."
"I rolled into school with a 18" tall, full steel, fully functional guillotine, bored to fit your standard #2 pencil to use it on for the demonstration. Cut many clean in half."
"I almost got suspended for bringing a weapon to school, after someone got their finger in under the blade, and it made its way to the bone from about 2". Had they had the blade all the way up when it slipped, it'd of taken their finger off."
"My dad was a machinist."
"A friend had a trebuchet, on a semi trailer. His dad parked it out front. We launched gallons of milk round about 500 yards with it. Hit a house over the football field, across the street, in a neighborhood."
"That was a fun day."
Contemporary 'Coptering'
"During quarantine, we have had to institute a no parents on the room with you who like you do schoolwork."
"The reason being a 16 year old girl and her mother would lie in bed together all class and the mother could be heard telling her daughter exactly what every answer was."
"I had the girl in previous years, and her homework was always leagues better than what she ever did in class, that explained a whole lot."
-- Ninjaraui666
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Some people typically don't like being told what to do because they think they already know what they're doing.
That is until they stumble and land on their face.
It turns out what they were resistant to accepting in the first place was accurate all along.
If only they listened.
Curious to hear of other people's growing pains, Redditor TinyUnderstanding948 asked:
"What lesson did you have to learn the hard way?"
You can protect yourself with these reminders.
Leave A Paper Trail
"Any monetary or business agreement needs to be in writing!"
– phi316
Observing The Fine Print
"Read the contract."
– BoB_thu_Builder
Generally speaking, business relationships and friendships are mutually exclusive.
Strictly Business
"Not everyone you work with is your friend."
– Cracktower
What Venting Led To
"My grandmother learned that the hard way a few years ago. Had been in the same industry since the 90s, was being paid less than she was worth honestly. On a break at work, she was venting to a coworker she thought she was friends with, about someone who worked in the same place as them."
"Word got back to the boss pretty fast and they used it as an excuse to stop giving her work and forced her out; they preferred a younger workforce that they could pay less. She had to retire without much savings, had to sell her house and move in with my aunt, and now has to live off of social security benefits. She probably would have never retired if she hadn't been forced to; because of her age, she wasn't able to get hired anywhere else."
– Cotton_Kerndy
Pretend Friends
"I work with someone who will laugh with you and pretend to be your buddy but as soon as you turn your back, she's already b*tched about you to 20 people and whined about you asking for her help with some small tasks (even though she offered her support)."
"The worst part is she is part of the HR team and she has a documented history of exploding at people, harassment and bullying, and not doing her job (because she spends most of her time crying and complaining). She is the stereotypical HR representative."
– Cole__MacGrath__
Consumers who were previously taken advantage of have the following advice to pass along.
Splurge On Good Quality
"Buy it nice or buy it twice."
– BlackFlorida
Caveat Emptor
"This is 100% accurate but needs a disclaimer: expensive does not always equate to nice."
– bumstopper
The relationships we have with people are complex, but you may want to keep these in mind.
Extending A Lifeline
"You can’t always help people. You can show them you care and point them toward help, but it’s up to them to get better. And if you fail, it’s not your fault."
– AerobaticDiamond
Don't Settle
"You can't have a relationship with someone's potential."
– comeawaywithmee
Achieve Mutual Adoration
"Loving someone doesn't mean they will keep loving you."
– mrenglish22
And when it comes to your health, listen up.
Hydrate
"Drink plenty of water."
"It's hard to know when you're dehydrated sometimes. Felt terrible and didn't know why. Never felt thirsty. Had skin issues, lack of sleep, irritability, lack of concentration, dizzy spells, could not function at work, among other things."
"Ended up at the ICU with an IV drip for severe dehydration."
"DRINK YOUR WATER!"
– bebarrucha
While advice from the people we care about comes from a good place, they are not always appreciated.
Sometimes, we have to make our own mistakes in order to fully comprehend why we should apply certain standards to the way we go about our lives.
At least for me, I've found that picking myself up and dusting myself off was most effective.
As patients, we rely on the expertise of medical professionals to be able to identify whatever ailments we're suffering through.
We brace ourselves if we fear the worst, but oftentimes, we end up being comforted by a minor diagnosis.
But all the medical degrees and years of education can't teach doctors to practice empathetic, yet professional, doctor-to-patient interaction on a basic human level.
That has to come naturally.
Curious to hear from patients who have had disappointing or distressing interactions with their physicians, Redditor TheSpasticSheep asked:
"What’s the most out of line thing a doctor has every said to you?"

It's horrifying when even doctors don't have a clue about your condition and, even worse, they gaslight you.
Dismissed Diagnosis
"A gentleman I worked with showed up to work one day looking extremely sick. He was incredibly feverish, had muscle and joint aches, very lethargic and was looking very jaundiced."
"we insisted that he go to the doctor, as he looks like he is on deaths door. He told us that he had been to 2 separate doctors and the ER, letting them know that he has Malaria, and can they please give him some anti malarials. Both doctors and the ER insisted that it 'was impossible to have malaria, as Australia doesn't have malaria,' and that he probably just had the flu, or some other viral infection. And they are correct. We don't have malaria here. But, what they failed to grasp was that this gentleman was an expat who worked in Africa for a number of years, and has had malaria 5 times already. So not only is he an expert in what malaria 'feels' like, but he is also at risk of developing malaria again, even if he hasn't been to Africa in a few years."
"He ended up having to go back to the ER, and basically force them to run a test for Malaria, after which they were like 'oh wow, you do have malaria.' And he was like 'no sh*t, i told you that 2 days ago.'"
– PanzerBiscuit
Not Going Mental
"I had smashed my face on my steering wheel during a bad car accident and was experiencing intense pain. I teared up when he put the scope in my nose and was told I obviously have psychological problems and if I went on medication it might not help my pain, but I wouldn't care as much."
"Finally found a good doctor and surgery removed the chunk of nose bone that was stabbing into a nerve in my face."
– coldbloodedjelydonut
The wrong treatment after a misdiagnosis can be a doctor's serious mistake.
Almost Scalped
"I had a growth on my scalp a few years ago and went to see a skin cancer specialist. Who said it was a malenoma and I was going to need most of my scalp removed. Without even having a biopsy. He starts telling me to prepare myself for this surgery that will disfigure me. I was about 19 at the time with long hair. He started saying ill need to wear a wig and my hair may not grow back and the skin above my eyes will need to be removed."
"I was petrified. Went home in tears and absolutely petrified."
"Then my dad took me to his doctor, who took a biopsy."
"It was just a random skin growth and she cut it off then and there."
"Far out."
– catsandalcohol13
Wrong Medication
"Years ago, one of the sexual health nurses at my work told me she just saw a woman who very clearly had a scabies infestation around her genitals. She said the treatment was simple and that a cream was applied with almost instant relief. She said what upset her about that patient was that almost a year earlier she’d been to a doctor about the infestation, the doctor didn’t even inspect her and just prescribed her antidepressants. I was horrified and still am over 7 years later. So much medical gaslighting."
– syberburns
"Too Young" For Cancer
"Not one, but two doctors to my dad- 'you’re too young to have prostate cancer, no need for a biopsy, it’s just a bladder problem.'”
"He died 15 months later from an aggressive prostate cancer that spread to create tumors all over his body."
– OHManda30
The "Sad" Pill
""While teaching abroad in Vietnam I was struggling with depression. The doc diagnosed me with homesickness and prescribed a box of 160 hydrocodone to take 'when I feel sad.'"
"I was 21 and this was 2007, way before pill use was talked about mainstream. Subsequent boxes were $12 each at a walk up pharmacy, no script needed. I became addicted for 6 years."
"Edit, as I have many people stating that pill use has been discussed forever: I’m talking about the point we got to where most people knew about the dangers of opioids, what the main ones were, the fact that they were being overprescribed etc. Had I heard the word hydrocodone and been exposed to the world and media like I have over the last decade with the spotlight on the opioid crisis, I would never have taken them. That’s the main point I was attempting to make."
– dogislove99
It's even more unsettling when someone you entrust your life to crosses a line.
Assessment Or Pick-Up Line?
"Mental health doctor told my daughter, 'You're too pretty to be depressed.'"
– geeleedickert
A NSFW Observation
"Not a doctor, but a dentist. When I was like 13 or 14 he commented on my lack of gag reflex, telling me that I’m going to be 'very popular with the boys.' It took me a few years to realize what he meant by that."
– goldmarigold
Mom To The Rescue
"I was the opposite. My dentist said, 'If you always gag like that, you're never going to find a good husband!'"
"I didn't understand why my mom yanked me out of the dentist's chair, but I'm proud of her for that. I think I was 6 or 7 years old."
– NeedsMoreTuba
The Gynocologist's Love Advice
"Mentioned that my sex drive was abnormally low to my gyno, and she said my husband just needed to be more forceful when initiating and I’d get into it. Immediately switched doctors and never looked back!"
– SpinningBetweenStars
The Gyno Who Jumped To Conclusions
"Mine was the opposite. Moved and went to a new gyno that several women raved about. I expressed concern over my low sex drive (especially since I was only 25). The next thing I know she is giving speeches and pamphlets and trying to give me info on women’s shelters. I was so confused."
"She just jumped to the conclusion I must be a battered woman. No matter what I said, she was convinced I was being abused. I tried to reassure her no, my husband was definitely NOT the problem and he was actually quite good in bed and extremely attentive to my needs. It was clearly a physical problem."
"Never went back. She even called several times to 'check' on me. I get that some women may need this, but I mean there was literally no red flags, quite the opposite. It was weird."
– Drachenfuer
Going to the doctor's office for any reason can cause a lot of anxiety.
Patients should never have their stresses exacerbated by an unqualified doctor giving them a false analysis or downplaying their concerns.
Hopefully, you're in good hands with a physician who is professional, as well as compassionate.
Growing up, I had zero idea that the food I ate daily was "cultural."
It didn't occur to me until I was a kid when my mother had to gently explain to me that not everyone ate rice & beans.
She had to explain it because we were about to eat at a white friend's house for the first time.
I've always been weird about food tastes and textures and mom needed to warn me that the beans I could expect would be nothing like what I knew.
They would be sweet, have big chunks of chewy pork (which would also be sweet), and would NOT be served with rice.
"What do you mean there's no rice with the beans? Did they run out? Should we bring some?"
"No, they just don't eat rice and beans."
"So what do they eat with their chicharron de pollo?"
"They don't eat that. They do fried chicken a little different and they tend to eat things like rotisserie chicken instead."
Y'all should have seen my face.
It's been thirty years and I still struggle with the idea of not eating rice and beans all the time. I've come to understand that not everyone grew up in a Caribbean cultural household, though, and most Americans ate from a whole other menu.
Reddit user remyleboi00 asked:
"Non-Americans, what is the best 'American' food?"
Even as someone born in America, it took a while before I got familiar with American food.
So if it's just not your comfort zone - let Reddit guide you to the can't miss dishes.
Cajun
"Cajun food. Definitely the most unique American food"
- Excision
"As an American I 100% agree with you. Cajun food is heaven sent"
- Chaoticqueen19
"That's because of it's native American roots, fun fact Cajun peppers are named after the south American tribe that influenced the Spanish/French who brought it to Louisiana. Maque Choux is also a very native American dish that can be found in Mexico as Calabasitas."
- Objective_Lion196
They Are Fun
"Curly fries 👌"
"Recently came across Carl’s jr for the first time in Istanbul airport and the curly fries were just the best"
- av_jet
"Absolutely!"
- GrandpasMormonBooks
"the fun thing about curly fries is that they are basically the same everywhere. I'm pretty sure it's one company supplying all the different fast food places"
- siccanimelord69
M.A.C.
"I hate to sound like an ignorant foreigner but a made from scratch Mac & Cheese with at least 3 different cheeses plus a crispy breadcrumb crust on top is one of my favorite American dishes"
- Mona_Moans
"Mac & Cheese is such a favorite of family get-togethers that if you volunteer to cook it, your Mac & Cheese needs references."
"It’s especially good with some pulled pork and caramelized onions mixed in. And some insulin."
- GetZePopcorn
"Solid choice. We Americans LOVE cheese."
- RyGuyStrong
"No need to apologize. One of our favorites too."
- sexysmartsingle
Thankful For Thanksgiving.
"I'm from Mexico and we get spoiled with our traditional cuisine but I found the thanksgiving dinner experience in the US incredible."
"Love everything, the turkey (dark meat :) ), cranberry sauce, the stuffing (oh the stuffing), mashed potatoes, salads and the delicious pays that follow for dessert. That whole combination plus the red wine and good company is an incredible experience hard to match."
- i5rider
"We also get spoiled with your traditional cuisine."
- Pharaon4
"I usually get a food coma on Thanksgiving"
- FrenchiesRule
"As an American who loves the Thanksgiving and other holiday classics this warms my heart to hear from someone whose cultural cuisine is considered a full on cultural heritage of humanity by UNESCO."
"A nicely done, quality turkey with proper attention paid to all the sides, and good friends and/family is such a great experience."
"Same with the ham or prime rib dinner at Christmas. And all the pies. God I love pumpkin pie."
- RedCascadian
Smokey Deliciousness
"Anything smoked: brisket, pork shoulder, chicken, turkey. I've even had smoked burgers. If seasoned well you don't even need BBQ sauce and it is so tender and juicy."
- stickiestofickies
"I smoke meatloaf, can't go back to oven baked ever again."
- JohnnyBrillcream
"This tread has me wanting to smoke a brisket sooner rather than later."
- firemage22
"I love smoked brisket. I agree with you about the sauce. Taste the brisket before dunking in another flavor."
- Sourbreaker
"Native Texan here. Agreed. The general rule here is that you never sauce beef. Let the flavor of the meat stand for itself. Hell, there are some places in Texas (particularly in Lockhart) that will ask you to leave their establishment if you ask for BBQ sauce."
"Now, pork and chicken, whatever else... Go nuts... Just leave beef alone."
- IAmTheZechariah
"I had smoked mac and cheese once, it was heavenly."
- RecursiveBob
Risk It All
"This is probably a recipe for disaster but I'm British and growing up visiting Florida I would love eating raw cookie dough from the refrigerator section"
- Blocker212
"Cookie dough is so good that, given the option between not eating it, or getting food poisoning, nearly everyone will pick the cookie dough."
"It’s one of the few foods in the country where everyone knows the risk of food poisoning, and everyone makes the conscious, willing, and eager decision to not give a f*ck."
- duckbill_principate
"All of us here in the U.S. know that eating the cookie dough is the best part of making homemade chocolate chip cookies. I have a recipe for brownies with a cookie dough topping. Cookie dough ice cream is also extremely common (it’s vanilla ice cream with cookie dough bits mixed in)."
- Idontcheckmyemail
The Holy Pudding
"I can’t find someone who’s listed it so"
"BANANA PUDDING"
"That shit is LIFE CHANGING"
- Madmagican-
"Gotta have the Nilla wafers or it isn't right."
- zekeweasel
"Ah, finally! A person of culture. Banana pudding is the closest food can come to a religious experience."
- timmeh4853
Cornbread!
"Oddly enough, no one seems to have mentioned it…but cornbread . Yeah , as a guy who moved here , Americans have got cornbread down to a T . Combined with some soul food ? Makes me smile on the inside . Gives me high blood pressure , but smile on the inside too"
- Thatmixedotaku
"A nice warm cornbread muffin with some butter and a little drizzle of honey is amazing."
- AvatarJack
"Cornbread with a nice bowl of chili is such a nice comfort food."
"And the spicier the chili the nicer the sweet, buttery cornbread is with it."
- WingedLady
A Classic
"Peanut butter and jelly sandwich, at first i thought it was a disgusting combo, but when i tried i loved it"
- ilovepotatoesalott
"Interesting, most people in America are introduced to pb&j before we're even old enough to remember"
- Clear_Impact2025
"Farmer’s market jam is the way."
- ubiquitous-joe
"That was my most frequent meal in elementary school. I didn't realize it was an American thing until recently."
- Robbie_the_Brave
"It's easily top 3 greatest sandwich ever."
- The_Exquisite
As American As It Gets
"I may be a simpleton, but an average diner with bottomless filter coffee, pancakes, bacon and syrup was my favourite part of the day. Although I did put on about 10-15kg after a month in Texas"
- BasedEvidence
"I missed this sooooo much when I lived in the UK (grew up in New Jersey, land of diners). They simply do not do American diner breakfasts in Europe."
- landshanties
"My wife is German, I am American but we live in Germany. We took her parents to the states with us one summer on vacation and one of the things they insisted we do was go to a diner where they pour your coffee at the table, like in movies and tv shows."
"Took them to my favorite little spot, they loved the waitress filling up their cups unprompted."
- the-real-truthtron
Now that youve heard Reddit, it's my turn.
So remember how I said that I wasn't really exposed to American food until I was a bit older, even though I was born and raised in America?
I was 22 before I had meatloaf and mashed potatoes.
FAM. Fam. Faaaaaaaaaaam.
There is no greater meal for after a night of drinking than a good meatloaf and a nice herb and garlic mashed potato.
Keep your greasy pizza, amateurs. It's potato time over here.
Have you ever been caught in a conversation you didn't want to be in? Or start talking to someone only to realize you want to stop? Perhaps you were talking to a friend when the conversation took a turn for the uncomfortable.
Whatever the case, we've all been in those situations where we want the conversation to stop, but don't want to be rude.
When I was in third grade, I asked if I voted on American Idol that week. I said yes, since everyone seemed to, but of course I didn't know what American Idol was. Being pop culture challenged, I thought it was a ship. Needless to say everyone was confused when I was asked who I voted for and I replied, "What do you mean? I voted for American Idol!"
It didn't take me long to realize something was amiss, and I probably would've very rudely excused myself from the conversation (fueled by my embarrassment) if my teacher hadn't called us to attention at that very moment.
Luckily, the people of Reddit were willing to share their methods to politely end a conversation when Redditor Spritti33asked:
"How does someone politely end a conversation with a person who won't stop talking?"
Extricate Yourself Immediately
"When they draw a breath, politely say:"
""On that note, I must be on my way.""
Then, simply leave."
– Back2Bach
Couldn't Get Him To Shut Up
"Yea I worked with a dude who needed to talk. I just talked to him to be polite and not awkward. And I remember him saying "at least you're not one of those people who are silent all day". In my head I'm like, "FUCK, I wish I could be silent all day but now that you said that it would be even more awkward."
"At some point, I just mentally said f**k it and started giving him one-word replies. I think he got the hint because he started talking to me less. Eventually, he quit after a couple of months so it's all good!"
"But some people just need to talk for whatever reason. I need my freaking silence."
– BlackSecurity
Put It In Writing
"I once worked with a man that managed to say nothing, despite talking nonstop. He would explain an issue to me over the span of 5 min. I would say "OK, so the issue you're having is x?" and he would say "No" then launch into a 5 min monologue about something completely different. One time, after half an hour talking with him I still had no idea what the problem was, so I said "put all the issues in an email so I can put it in the queue" and just left. Never got a coherent email either but at least a rambling incoherent email is easier to walk away from and less time-consuming."
– TechnologyFetish
Put Them (Back) To Work
"If you're in an office building with someone (or any location the person you're talking to has a desk), one trick you can try is walking them back to their desk, say something like "well, I'll let you get back to it!", then turn around and leave."
– RegulusMagnus
Taking Care Of Each Other
"My workplace has someone like this and it’s pretty much become a part of our culture to monitor who is trapped talking to her, for how long they’ve been stuck, and to rescue them after an appropriate amount of time has passed. She doesn’t get it, and probably never will."
– Lady_DreadStar
Talk To The Door
"My husband worked with a woman who would not stop talking. Just wouldn't. So you'd gather your stuff, while she monologued. You'd say goodbye to everyone else, while she monologued. You'd walk to the door as she followed you and shut the door in her face while she monologued. You could hear her still talking to you behind the closed door while you walked away."
– BoozeIsTherapyRight
Take Your Turn
"I learned a trick. Most excessive talkers hate listening. So I simply participate and tell my own stories. After one or two stories they are usually ready to leave themselves to seek their next victim."
– RireBaton
Create A Deadline
"My entire dad's side of the family are the type that never stop talking."
"The key to getting a word in is to just respond to whatever you wanted to add to even if they are still talking. It might feel rude but most people who are like that were raised in environments where that's the norm or in the case of people with disorders like ADHD and Autism, they most likely know they have the tendency and will roll with it."
"Best way I've found to get end a conversation with ramblers is to set a deadline as early as possible in the conversation (ex: I have to leave at 6pm to get to ______ on time). If you do this you can do the "I'm sorry I really have to go" and immediately leave without offending them because you've already set the expectation that you would be leaving at a certain time."
– aflyingcowpie
Music
"This is why I hate taking Lyft/Uber alone, I seem to always get the folks who just want to talk the entire time. My boyfriend tells me to just not engage but when you’re in a car with someone it’s kinda hard not to. The ONE time I just wore headphones the whole time, the driver at the end said “maybe you’ll actually talk next time”"
– sm0gs
"Headphones..."
– bob_marley98
No Need To Feel Bad
"People who are like this expect folks to just walk away from them while they are talking because that’s the only way the conversation ends. It’s not rude to them, it’s normal. So, it’s entirely okay to say, “all right this has been great, see you later,” and then just walk away smiling."
– paulpowell9
Sometimes it's hard to get out of a conversation you never wanted to be in, and sometimes it's equally as hard to keep your temper in check.
However, if you remember some of these tips and tricks, you may be able to successfully get yourself out of an unpleasant or unceremoniously long conversation in the future!