Handing your class over to a substitute is one of those things teachers seem to universally feel some anxiety about.
You're not only handing over your space, but you're also handing over your kids, your plans, etc. Still, there are times that it's necessary and it's not like a substitute can mess things up too badly, right?
One Reddit user asked:
Teachers, What was the worst thing a substitute teacher did while you were gone?
So listen, there are countless wonderful and amazing substitute teachers around the world who education systems would totally fail without.
This article is not about them.
This article is about the folks who need to be led away in handcuffs.
This article is about folks who wake up on the HGTV side of the bed and decide to give the teacher's classroom a total makeover.
This article is about ... well ... these people.
Adam's "Phone"
i feel sick butters GIF by South Park GiphyI had a Grade 1 and 2 class last year and one student had diabetes. Let's call him Adam.
So Adam had a cell phone that beeps when his blood sugar is too low/high. It's connected to the monitor in his arm/hip. The cell phone has no other uses, no apps, no data, not connected to the school wifi.
The substitute saw his phone on his desk and promptly took it away as per the "no devices" rule.
During gym class an EA comes in to make sure everything is ok. Adam is visibly ill. He is pale, sweating; the whole works. Luckily this EA knows Adams medical plan, instantly asks the Adam for the phone and he explains that the substitute took it away in the morning.
The EA then LOSES IT on the substitute demanding the phone. The substitute calls in the principal - to demand that they reprimand the EA.
Instead, she got reprimanded herself as obviously she did not read the students safety plans.
She was asked to leave and the principal taught the class the rest of the day. Adam was fine, drank a couple juice boxes and had a granola bar. Mom picked him up shortly after.
The Miracle Of Birth
Back when I was a teacher, I had a sub decide my plans weren't good enough for her and went rogue. She decided to show my students videos of animals giving birth on YouTube.
I taught sixth-grade English...
Making The Space Your Own
Re-arranged my room.
Not in a "Moved Student A away from Student B and put her by Student C" way.
In a "Move the giant rug over to the opposite corner of the room, and completely change the layout of student desks, and rearrange a bookshelf" way.
- d239
I had the same thing happen!
Except she took my three big bookshelves apart and threw them in the dumpster. She said that she didn't like them and they didn't look like they belong in the room anyway.
I came back to the books just in a big pile in the middle of the room. Definitely the weirdest experience as a teacher.
- ilawsabs
Nap Time
Went to sleep for 1.5 hours. My class was freaking amazing—the sweetest, most thoughtful group I've ever had. When I got back the next day, I asked how the sub was.
Me: How was the sub?
Them: uhhh... he was fine. He kinda took a nap for a while.
Me: WHAT?! What did you guys do?
Them: Worked quietly so that we wouldn't wake him up. Eventually we ran out of work, so we just had silent reading.
Me: For how long?
Them: From when we started working until it was time to go outside.
Me: That's a really long time! Look, I am glad that you guys were so thoughtful, but if something like that ever happens again, please wake the sub up. It's not safe for the sub to sleep. He needed to be awake in case something happened.
Them: We would have woken him up if we really needed to. But we also figured he probably really needed the sleep.
Seriously. The SWEETEST class ever!
Such An Intriguing Cat
I had a cool Chinese Lucky Cat that went missing after I had a sub.
My students said the sub seemed really intrigued by it, talked about it several times, and even moved it from the shelf where it sat and brought it over to my desk.
It was gone when I returned the next day. 😒
How The Grinch Ruined Christmas
grinning the grinch GIFGiphyThe first year I taught 5th grade, I really wanted to do something special for my students before Christmas vacation.
I spoke with my team and we came up with the idea to make every single student a personalized Christmas ornament. We were going to surprise them by displaying the ornaments on a Christmas tree the day before vacation and they would be able to take them home.
I was gone for a department thing the day before we were going to set up the tree, and one of the least liked subs was scheduled for my class. Since I had stored all the ornaments in my closet, I simply asked if the students needed any supplies, make sure to get them yourself and not let them see the surprise.
The thing about this sub, and the reason she wasn't liked, was that her first line of defense was always to threaten to take away something from for misbehaving: recess, free time, lunch, etc.
I think you know where I'm going with this...
Fast forward to the end of the day, I get back to my classroom in the last 30 min of class so I could dismiss them.
All of a sudden, I'm met with 25 kids asking about their ornaments. I tried to play dumb and asked them what they were talking about.
Of course the sub said something.
She told the students about the ornaments and said if they misbehaved, she would tell me and I would take away their ornaments.
Instantly, I was filled with horror that the surprise was ruined for all 5th grade. They're kids, they told the whole grade during recess.
Also anger because that damn sub ruined the surprise and disappointment because I really wanted to see their faces when they walked through the door the next day and saw a special Christmas tree with their personalized ornaments.
It's not the biggest deal or anything, but I was really upset that weekend. To this day, when I talk to my old partners, I still refer to her as the Grinch!
They Left A Note
There was a harpsichord in the front of the classroom used both for demonstration and performance.
Not knowing what he was doing, the sub tried to tune 3 notes that had gone mildly out of tune while I was away. He managed to break the strings on all 3 notes and left a message inside reading: "Sorry about that . . ."
In 45 Minutes
A few of the periods I taught were co-teach classes where a percentage of the students in the class have special needs but can work well enough in a general population classroom with assistance from a special education co-instructor.
These classes were often very rewarding to teach, but one downside of teaching that population from a logistical standpoint is that I was often required to attend 'ARD' meetings. Basically every special education student has a meeting about twice a year, sometimes more frequently depending on need, where administrators, teachers, counselors, parents/guardians, and the student themself all get together to go over their status and review the various educational accommodations the student is receiving to determine what may or may not need to change to best suit their needs.
I didn't have a problem with attending these meetings per se, but because they only take ~1 period, and several teachers are rotating through various meetings over the course of a day, the school had devoted 'ARD subs' who were more akin to babysitters (at best) than substitute educators. That means that during that one period, hell can randomly break loose.
One year I had a 'tough' student who had some serious attitude problems, but was a good person underneath it all and with whom I'd done a lot of work with to improve her engagement and interest in my class.
About half way through the year, I got called for an ARD meeting during the period I had said student. In my absence of ~45 minutes the sub decided to pick a petty argument with my kid, who was rightfully offended but unwisely overreacted.
Things escalated to making threats and nearly coming to blows with the sub. My student ended up with in-school suspension for a while.
Getting the story from all parties and witnesses involved later, it was pretty clear the sub was to blame, and the kid who I'd worked so hard with was back at square one. I eventually got her back on track, end she ended up with one of the highest grades in my class at the end of the year.
I could only imagine how much better she could've been without that setback and the amount of trust in adults she'd lost after being punished for something the substitute teacher was at fault for.
What Actually Happened
I came back after being gone ONE DAY and my students told me the substitute teacher flipped over tables in a rage and was escorted from the building by a cop.
That's not what actually happened, but it's not far off.
Apparently the sub left the room to take a 20 min phone call and the kids thought it would be funny to flip the tables over.
The substitute then had to flip the tables right side up while yelling at the kids.
That's what they called "flipping tables in a rage."
So now let's talk about what actually actually happened after the table thing.
During lunch, my Special Ed. Co-teacher came into my room to set up and caught the sub MAKING OUT WITH A STUDENT.
She was 18 to his 25. That 20 min phone call he took earlier was to set up the lunch meeting.
The principal then had him removed from the building by the resource officer; so yeah he was escorted from the building by a cop.
This is why I say having a sub is more work than just coming into school my damn self.
Hell And The Holocaust
I'm the student in this case, but I'll still share the story because to this day I'm still fuming about it.
When I was in year nine history we were learning about the Holocaust. My teacher was out that day, and we had a sub who no one had ever met.
We all went into the classroom, sat down, and waited for him to say something. His first words to us, and I quote, were "The only thing humans have done that is worse than the Holocaust is the crucifixion of Christ."
Literally. No hello, no introduction, just that.
Now, in the class there were a lot of kids who were atheists, and a few from other religions. There were also three Jewish siblings whose great grandparents were murdered in a concentration camp.
People went absolutely wild, yelling at the sub of how insensitive that was when we had Jewish students whose own family were victims of the Holocaust.
The sub went bright red and started screaming that we were all going to hell and that we had sinned so terribly he couldn't bear to look at us. He left the room and that was the last we ever saw of him.
Lunch
Guy left his lunch plate in my room.
There was half a chicken thigh and rice on my desk when I showed up. That's bad enough, but it's not the worst part. The worst part was that it was a Friday sub.
I showed up on Monday. It smelled so bad.
NKOTB Oh No
hangin tough new kids on the block GIFGiphyI'm definitely late to the party that was last week, but I think this was a good one. I am a teacher, but was reminded of what I horrified by as a student.
This happened in the 4th grade. It was 1989 and The New Kids on the Block were performing for the school that sent in the most index cards with their school's name on it.
The Student Council was pushing for this every say for what seemed like a full year. It had gotten annoying. But those 8th graders gave their final plea over the PA system.
It was a Friday and out sub looked like she was having "a day."
Throughout the announcement, my Catholic grade school friends snickered, giggled and poked fun. Our substitute was visibly upset, "shush"ing kids, while talking to herself under her breath.
At the end of the announcement, we all erupted in a low "BOOO!" to which the substitute screamed at us: "EXCUSE ME! That is enough!"
She began to sob and cry, "How dare you do that to those people..."
Huh? We were more than a little confused.
"Put yourself in their shoes. What if you were a new person in a new city or town. Wouldn't you want people to be welcoming and loving when you arrived? How dare you laugh and make fun? and 'Boo' of all things! You should be ashamed of yourselves!"
Wiping her tears with crusty tissues from her pocket, she pointed to one of my classmates who raised her hand. "What, Meaghan?!"
The New Kids are a singing group.
Awkward.
Fuming Over Fumes
Oh my gosh. I totally forgot my best sub story until I read some of the others lol.
One day I was absent for district training. Most of my team was out, too. So there were several subs around. During first period, several of my students started complaining that a strong gasoline type smell was giving them a headache. It was really bad, and the substitute kept telling them she didn't smell anything. Same thing happened again the next period, but one of my students happened to be a principal's daughter. She texted her mom, who came to investigate. The smell was strong they smelled it in the hallway. They had to evacuate the entire 3600 student school while the fire department came to check it out. By the time they came, the smell in my room was gone.
However, several people still smelled the gasoline outside. The other substitutes were crowded together, and realized the smell was coming from MY SUBSTITUTE.
It was such a strange smell to be on a person that no one realized it was her. One of the principals asked her to go home and come back after lunch, after she had gotten rid of the smell (they didn't have any spare substitutes to cover my afternoon classes).
She came back...but this time she smelled like gasoline mixed with a bucket of perfume. She hadn't even changed clothes! It was so wild to hear that evening haha.
Mr. Retired Art Teacher
We have a retired art teacher who subs in our district, that pretty much ignores lesson plans and just does art all day. Long story short: I was recruited in November to take a class of 4th graders after their teacher just walked out of the classroom and quit.
I've got 13 days before parent/teacher conferences and I want my new classroom to look nice and welcoming for the kids and parents, so I spend the entire weekend decorating the classroom.
The following week I have to go to the district office for some training, paperwork etc. so I schedule a sub. Guess who I get?
Yep, Mr. Retired Art teacher - nobody had warned me about him at that point!
Not only does he ignore my lesson plan and do art all day, he takes down ALL of my decorations, kids work, required postings etc. and fills the walls with his "art." He took down everything I had just worked so hard doing.
Plus he throws my stuff in the garbage! That old man does not know how close he was to death when I saw what he did!!!
- furlie
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These workers and the world already has enough trouble without my stupid.
"So... was she impressed?"
Idiot Reaction GIFGiphy"Kid driving his new truck down a residential street, wet from a recent rain, lost control and hit a parked car, overcorrected and rolled it once back onto its wheels up onto a lawn. He told the fire chief he had gunned it to impress his girlfriend and the chief just looked at him and asked 'So... was she impressed?'"
AntiMacro
Ricky
"I had a client once who was basically Ricky from Trailer Park Boys, loud, obnoxious, hilarious and every second word was some Maritime slang or a derivative of 'f**k.' He has been on daily eye drops for decades for dry eyes, sure ok cool. I hear screaming down the hall and run in and he's wedged against the wall and the bed just screaming 'I f**ked up boys, I dunno what the f**k is f**king happening but It's f**ked."
"Turns out he mistakenly put Jublia which is an antifungal ointment for toenails in his eye thinking it was his eye drops. The strangest part was the bottle has this miniature sponge at the end so you soak the sponge then paint it on like a gel...he painted this antifungal ointment onto his eye which immediately went red and angry then proceeded to do the other one."
"So he's at the eyewash station and I'm talking to poison control and they are pretty stunned because they have zero data on what happens to a human eyeball when it's painted in antifungal. I can hear the staff at the other end kind of snickering under her breath and she asks can you compare and contrast the eyes? Well... he put it in both eyes. The line goes silent because I can tell she is howling. Guy was totally fine but it was a standout for sure."
krzysztoflee
Will they show?
"Responded to a call of two minors being kidnapped and their parents being beaten in front of them and then taken someplace else. One was around three years and the other one was six. They were held captive in an apartment out of hundreds of residential apartments which not easy to locate, upon reaching there we found out that the boy six was just playin' with us to see if we would actually respond. Their parents were so embarrassed by all of that and vowed to not give them mobile until they are adults."
erectilereptilelol
Bowled Over
"When I was an EMT in NYC years ago we had a call for a man 'unresponsive.' We entered an upscale apartment that was a hoard: floor to ceiling newspapers and magazines, just a mess. The woman who called said her brother was in his bedroom sick."
"We entered his room and it was pretty obvious that he had already passed away. She had placed a bowl under his mouth because he had hemorrhaged which had coagulated the day before it was crazy. We asked her why she hadn’t called sooner and she said thought he’d get better?!"
"The joke around the house was 'if you have to put a bowl under a relative who is bleeding from the mouth, call 911. Don’t wait.' Never thought we’d have to advise anyone to do that. But there ya go. Also, it was Thanksgiving. Didn’t eat any cranberry sauce that year."
Sufficient-Swim-9843
God Only Knows
Married At First Sight Lol GIF by LifetimeGiphy"Had a guy call because he had the cure to Covid and needed a ride to the local education hospital so he could share it. Dude was so high on meth He ended up having 4 or 5 binders worth of scientific looking notes. God only knows what was actually in them."
Flame5135
Wow, people really need to get a grip. Of their minds.
"Sparky"
on fire GIFGiphy"One of my old bosses once built a new shed in his back yard, to replace his old, worn-out one. He moved everything from the old one to the new one, then decided that the best way to remove the old one was by burning it down. He ended up with no sheds and the nickname 'Sparky.'"
Wadsworth_McStumpy
Dead in the living room...
"Paramedic here. We responded to this 54 year old having chest pain. Man was having a heart attack. Dude didn't want to go to the hospital because it too early in the day. That's it. We tried to convince him to go. Got the ER doc to talk to him and he wouldn't budge. He signed a Refusal. Later that same night, his family found him. Dead in the living room. We got to him and started CPR, meds, everything. Dude didn't make it. When we advise you to go to the hospital, go."
Chaprito
Bad Ideas
"Got called to a shooting. A guy says he received a text message from an anonymous number saying his brother has been shot. He checks all the hospitals with no luck. He goes to his brother's apartment but gets no response at his door but sees his car and can hear the TV on. We get there, attempt to get an answer at the door."
"Eventually we kick the door in to make sure he wasn't dying in his apartment. We boot the door, announce police, and find him asleep in his bed. The guy tells us that he got a new phone number and decided to mess with his brother by texting him he had been shot. He then fell asleep and forgot about the text and was woken up by us. So many wasted resources on his idiotic prank."
TheDOC816
The Swimmer
"Got called to a priority job. The caller was kayaking in a lake and said that there was an unresponsive male in the water. So off we went, lights and sirens. We requested paramedics and fire to attend as well for the rescue operation. There were about 6 emergency vehicles attending including a rescue boat. We got there within minutes and met the caller who showed us where the guy was."
"He was just swimming, minding his own business. The caller said he was unresponsive, but really he was just ignoring her. Had a chat with the guy, he seemed alright, said he swims here every day and likes the quiet. No issues. Would have been nice if the caller told the operator that he was still conscious and swimming rather than 'unresponsive.'"
amazingbecauseitis
Chew Slowly
Snl GIF by Saturday Night LiveGiphy"Well, I was taking a lady home from dialysis and she decided to eat a snickers in the back of the ambulance, and she started choking. Had to do the heimlich, and tell her to finish her food at home."
HotSoupInYourA**
If it's not a true emergency dial 311. Please.
As if knowledge isn't scary enough, let's her more...
Hello Terry
paint surgery GIF by gifnewsGiphy"Some tumors have teeth, hair and even eyes."
Twat_Waffle_Stomp
"My sister had one minus the eyes! It was cantaloupe sized on one of her ovaries before it was found. She named it Terry the Teratoma."
Karina_is_my_cat
Hungry Bacteria
"Brain-eating amoebas."
dark_n_lovely_qu33n
"My best friend and bunk mate from summer camp died from one of those when I was in 7th grade. Happened so quickly, we were a week into camp and he got really sick. They gave us all heavy meningitis shots because they didn’t know what it was and within a few days he was dead. Turned out to be a brain eating amoeba."
"Edit: strangely enough on the same day he started getting sick one of the lifeguards that was sitting out in a boat waiting for the next group of kids for what we called Trojans Vs. Spartans day had a seizure, fell off the boat and drowned. Only deaths they’d ever had in the 50+ years the camp had been open."
Csharp27
Far Far Away
"The size of our galaxy, how many other galaxies there are and how far away they are. When you can actually see something that incomprehensible.."
Jfonzy
"The nearest star to us would take the Voyager 70,000 years to reach. The nearest galaxy to ours would take the Voyager 749,000,000 years. If we some how managed to take on the monstrous task of speed of light travel it would still take 25,000 years to reach the nearest galaxy. And it's even further apart after you read this. Wild stuff!"
ConqueredCorn
Head Changes
"How the brain is literally rewired and chemically altered by childhood neglect and abuse."
petalumaisreal
"It's genuinely kinda freaky, playing a puzzle game, and noticing how quickly you're getting better at it. The kind of puzzles that were a real blocker in the beginning become baby-easy after like an hour of playing puzzles like it."
LtLabcoat
"My sister faced horrible abuse at the hands of our father, and she has been working through it with multiple therapists over the last 10 years and she is only now starting to get her life back. I feel like she was robbed at a fair chance at life because of our a**hole father."
Pehdazur
Awake
Bill Murray Im Here GIF by Groundhog DayGiphy"Prions, horrific and totally unpredictable."
geordiesteve520
"Fatal familial insomnia is a prions disease where you can't sleep anymore, you just stay awake until your brain deteriorates and you die."
DrinknEspresso
Now I can never UNKNOW about prions. Perfect.
Days gone by...
Aging Matt Damon GIFGiphy"Ageing. I'm content with death but the idea of my body growing old, frail and eventually falling apart before the end game gives me goosebumps."
EvidenceOfInnocence
Bursts
"Gamma ray bursts. No warning, no escape, no defense, no survivors."
Swampwolf42
"If you're talking about supernovas if the star isn't too close the gamma burst would probably only destroy some part of our ozone layer. And gamma radiation is actually the least lethal out of all types of waves."
Broccoli_sauce24
Sizzle
"Entropy. Time shall consume all things. Inevitable heat death of the universe."
Revolutionary_Elk420
"I personally want the 'Big Crunch' to be true. That instead of fizzling out it all gets sucked back into an infinitely small/dense particle and then another Big Bang happens. It’s my explanation for the multiverse. It’s all one timeline. Just infinitely long."
ChoppyWAL99
They're Watching
"More like a theory, the 'orangutan paradox,' when we film a documentary on orangutans, they can’t realize that we are observing them, yet they are the most intelligent species of their category, so aliens might be watching us and we are as oblivious as an orangutan."
Time_Succotash
Fade 2 Silent
Listen Scooby Doo GIF by MashedGiphy"That hearing is the last sense to leave, when dying."
User Deleted
Well that is the antithesis of comfort. Life is so fun.
Redditor Ebo8000 wanted to know:
"What is your most controversial take on Star Wars?"
Doors
"LASERS LOCK DOORS. LASERS OPEN DOORS. LASERS KNOW WHAT YOU WANT THE DOOR TO DO."
- SlamVanDamn
"But if you get past the door and close it behind you and you don’t want anyone to follow you through it…"
"…you shoot the bloody door panel!"
- treeonwheels
"Also, f*cking hell, we're in the future (or in the past), whatever, and people have better technology."
"Why put the door control RIGHT NEXT to the door? Put the door control system in a breaker box."
"Build every door so in case of malfunction they all shut closed (after all, they're in space and you don't want to lose air in decompression, do you?)"
"Shoot the breaker box, now the whole floor is closed until someone can figure out what happened."
"Almost look like those doors just exist as dramatic elements..."
- smegma_yogurt
GiphyThe Past
"I’d like a film about when the Republic was at its height. 1,000 generations is 25,000 years and we’ve had 9 movies about the last 60."
- Musickat18
The Future
"Not sure if controversial but they need to take the franchise and yeet it 200 years in the future."
"I'm tired of the Empire era where they need to justify why more than 2 Jedi and 2 Sith exist at one moment alongside knowing everything is pointless until Luke leaves the farm."
- Alandrus_sun
Design Fail? No!
"The Death Stars weren't badly designed they were just badly managed."
"Yes, designing them assuming large scale assaults was stupid given the political state of the galaxy but the second Death Star wasn't even finished so that doesn't count, it's all Palpatine's fault. As for the first one that was finished, the Alliance made three runs on the exhaust port."
"The first was called off before they made it to the trench, the second failed and the third was carried out by space Jesus which isn't exactly fair."
"All in all it sounds like a fairly effective defence when you consider the design philosophy."
- Engeneus
GiphyCool Factor
"The entire universe has a cool factor that outweighs the atrocious storytelling."
- Ozty
"Bro imagine the following movies, but if they were in Star Wars universe."
"Magnificent 7 - A Jedi, Bounty Hunter, Ex-Imperial, Pilot, Wookie, a Droid, and Lawman team up to defend a town against pirates"
"Dredd - Two Jedi climb up an apartment block to confront a new dark side user who has mental control of the entire apartment block"
"Supernatural (T.V. Show) - A Jedi and their apprentice go around and solve and defeat Dark Side Force spots—where the Force consolidates from emotions and creates foul creatures to fight"
"Top Gun - But it's you know, Wedge or something"
"Ford versus Ferrari - But it's podracing or swoop racing"
- BoutsofInsanity
Ships
"Something about the ships in the original series always felt more like real ships than in any of the later movies, despite the objectively better effects of the later films."
"Some of this is probably the use of models (i.e. actual three dimensional objects), but I think there is some critical difference in the design that makes them feel more real (probably because they were designed to be things that would actually work as models)."
"Whatever it is, I LOVED the ships in the original series and never really liked any of the new ones."
- UnspecificGravity
"The original trilogy changed the world by showing a universe in space that was dirty and lived in. The special effects from the later movies did not recognize this."
GiphyBoba who?
"Boba Fett is an oddly overrated background character, and even after watching The Book of Boba Fett, I don’t really care about him."
- imidoesonlyfans
"He was never a character. He was a cool helmet."
- JimPlaysGames
"He was a cool jetpack too."
- RipperFromYT
GiphyTime for the weather...
"Han is actually older than Obi-Wan due to Time Dilation."
- Snowbofreak
"Time dilation in a universe where every planet and moon has the same gravity and atmosphere?"
- suman_issei
"And just 1 biome."
- DogShampoop
"That way they only need one Weather Channel per planet."
- The_Most_Superb
"And over to Klaatu for the Tatooine weather report. Klaatu?"
"It's still sunny."
- Budsygus
GiphyThese are the droids we're looking for.
"Star Wars is actually the life story of C-3PO—think about it."
- jonguy77
"I disagree. I think its R2-D2's story. He had a much greater presence in Episode 1, 2 and 3, and got the same amount of screen time as C-3PO in 4, 5 and 6."
‐ MacGregor_Rose
GiphyFan is short for fanatic.
"Fans ruined the whole franchise."
- SeaworthinessNo5209
Ouch...
So, did your controversial Star Wars opinion make the list?
Hollywood hasn't helped, as movies and TV have typically portrayed death as something sinister and violent.
How could anyone be convinced death is a peaceful transition, and that what awaits on the other side is actually an unimaginable utopia?
Curious to hear strangers' thoughts about death, Redditor GoodNess2020 invoked a quote by an iconic literary figure and asked:
"Mark Twain once said, 'I do not fear death. I had been dead for billions and billions of years before I was born, and had not suffered the slightest inconvenience from it.' Why do you agree/disagree with his statement?"
People clarified what actually terrified them most about death
The Process
"I don't fear being dead. I fear dying."
– magicbluemonkeydog
"Yeah, that's usually the issue. It's why that quote doesn't mean much, to a lot of people."
"It's not a fear of eventually dying and not existing anymore. It's the act of dying itself. He didn't constantly die for all of time. He just wasn't alive."
– appleparkfive
Concept Of Loss
"To have not existed for billions of years is to have spent billions of years never knowing loss. To die is to know loss."
"If you look into a new bank account and see zero dollars, it’s nothing. If you look into a bank account that once had a million dollars and see there’s nothing in there, you’ll know it’s absence."
– -CrestiaBell
People provided an analogy to articulate what ceasing to exist must feel like.
It's About Time
"Time is only relevant to you when you are alive. He is right. Have you ever been sedated for surgery? You go under, and then instantly wake up and procedure is done.... or you died so no worries."
– 20190419
Consciousness Is Life
"You won’t be feeling anything in death though is the thing. That infinite/instant sensation was a living feeling, you just weren’t conscious for it - your body experienced it anyways. No body, no experience."
– Parradog1
Like Being Under
"That is very true, but for me, that's the closest amalgamation of what it probably feels like."
"No one can tell you what actual death will be like. It's impossible for you to experience nothingness."
"Thinking about death can be paralysing sometimes, and when I remember that the closest thing i can link as an experience I had, being put under, was actually sort of pleasant. I then think maybe death will be like that, and honestly it doesn't seem that bad."
– IamEclipse
When In Deep Sleep
"Yeah in contrast to sleep where you can actually feel like time has passed when you wake up."
– GreyFoxMe
Think Line Between Death And Slumber
"As CGPGrey puts it, your bed might very well be a suicide machine."
"Given our lack of understanding for the fundamental processes of our sentience, it's entirely possible that when you fall asleep, your mind is functionally killed, disassembled, analyzed, sorted, tweaked, and adjusted by your biology, before being reassembled when you wake. Every night."
– Mazon_Del
People opened up about their insecurities around the concept of death.
Fear Of What Comes Next
"I’m just paranoid that something does happen after death and it’s just based on one thing that you didn’t know about."
– PsychoDog_Music
The Circle Of Death
"There’s nothing to fear in oblivion. Unless, of course, your consciousness survives death. If so, it would be reasonable to fear the sensation of consciousness without senses, suspended alone in the cosmos, with no one to hear you, and no way to make yourself known. No reference point for counting time – a count that does not matter anyway in a literal eternity."
"You might wish that you still had a corporeal form, only so that you could make your mouth move to express your terror, to make the universal form of a terrified scream – the form of a letter O."
"But you won’t be able to. You just won’t!"
"This has been the Children’s Fun Fact Science Corner. Brought to you by shame, loneliness, and the letter..."
"O....."
– CecilSpeaksInItalics
When Faith Fails You
"what do you mean I'm going to hell?! I was a good person and attended church regularly!"
"Ah yes, but you failed to put a blue feather in your hat and then turn in circles the times praising God Almighty on the fifth Sunday after your twelfth birthday. To the pit with you!!!"
– phormix
There is an poignant episode from the Twilight Zone that brought me a sense of peace surrounding the concept of death.
Death was embodied by a handsome police officer who had been shot–played by a young Robert Redford–and begs to be let into the home of an elderly woman who had been living in perpetual fear of meeting "Mr. Death."
As the episode continues, she discovers much to her dismay that she welcomed Death into her home, but he warmly reassures her there is nothing to fear.
The episode ends with her finally offering her hand to Death after much protest, and they peacefully walk out together, arm in arm, into the light.
It was sweet and beautifully done. The 1962 episode was titled, "Nothing in the Dark."
That's how I imagine it to be.
A dashing Prince of Darkness telling me it's time to join him in guiding me to the other side.