Don't be a snitch if there is really no reason to snitch. Students of all ages can be so petty and dramatic. I should know, in college I was one of them. LOL. Teachers wear so many hats in the course of a school day, referee and therapist sound like the most insane. Every five seconds you have someone running up to you to complain. There is a good life lesson, know when tattling is necessary. Is someone dead? Is someone injured? Then work it out yourselves kids.
Redditor u/Im-Original wanted the educators out there to give a few tales of tattlers by asking them to divulge.... Teachers of reddit, what is the stupidest reason a kid has told on someone else?Stop Taylor
scared the launch GIF by CTVGiphyTeacher, Taylor's face is making me sick and he won't look away from me.
Stop looking at him and take your damn nap.
"I hear you..."
"He said a bad word!"
"I'm standing right next to him and I didn't hear anything."
"Well, I can read his mind."
In a similar vein, when I was 9 or 10 my teacher sent me to the principal's office for swearing, and he called my mom to pick me up for the day because he didn't believe me when I said I didn't use any bad words.
My mom marched me to my teacher's classroom and wanted to know what I said, because she also thought I was lying.
My teacher was very serious and explained how utterly disgusted she was when I said "dang" in her classroom.
Yup. Dang. My mom was not at all happy the situation.
Not the C!
Little girls runs up to me at recess and says another girl called her the C word. I was thinking, "Oh no, not the C word." I explained that she was just going to have to tell me exactly what the other girl called her. She said she called her "coochie." Not at all what I was thinking.
SNITCH!
Snitch GIF by memecandyGiphyIn second grade my friend told the class tattle tale that he was a snitch. And the kid stood right up out of his desk and yelled to the teacher "HE CALLED ME A SNITCH, I AM NOT A SNITCH." And my friend said "you're doing it right now, stupid." And it was all during a silent reading time and it was super quiet up until that point.
Tongues Out
I had a student (2nd grade) that would stick her tongue out just a little when she was concentrating. One day during silent reading another kid came to tell me she was being rude to him. I explained she wasn't and it was just something she did when she was thinking really hard. His response was, "Well I don't like it," to which I replied, "Well then don't look at her." He was all kinds of upset but stopped complaining.
Oh the Intensity
I was a summer camp counselor (18 years old) at the time. A boy (we'll call him Brian) about 13-14 years old came up to another counselor and I almost crying.
He complained younger kids (4-5 boys about 10-11years old) were teasing him because of how he ran. Brian claimed (lied) his gym teacher told him "humans run faster by not using their arms."
We asked him if he could demonstrate his "superior human ability" and show us this run. He literally ran like a Naruto ninja, and looked absolutely ridiculous... we had to fight hard to hold back the laughs. We told the younger kids to stop teasing him, but also suggested Brian his "gym teacher" may be wrong.
Whatever you are picturing, magnify the insanity by 10. It was like he learned how to run watching only Napoleon Dynamite and Naruto.
EDIT: tried to make it easier to read. Thank you all so much for the upvotes, I usually just lurk, so this is my highest rated comment ever. I know it's not much, but it motivates me to contribute more. Thank you.
Scribble Away
"He took a pen from the drawer and not a pencil!"
This was after I told my 17 year old students to grab a pencil and paper because we were going to do notes that day. I have no rules about pens not being used, I just didn't say the more generic 'writing utensil'. And the student who tattled wasn't on the spectrum and wasn't normally super literal.
Stand Down
rocky sylvester stallone GIFGiphyWhen I was a substitute teacher a kid told on me to the principal.
I had made the okay sign with my hand at about chest level. This is the same sign that if placed below the waist and someone sees they get to punch you.
This kid told the principal she thought I was going to punch her.
Erase it Please
In 7th grade, I still had no idea what a swastika was. A Jewish friend was explaining it to me and had me draw it out. After I drew it in exact detail to what he said to do, he immediately got up and told the teacher I was drawing swastikas. I tried to erase it but the damage was done.
I got a weeks detention on lunch for that crap. Even after I explained what happened.
Toy Times
toy story 4 toys GIF by Walt Disney StudiosGiphyI'm not a teacher but I did work in a school environment in the past and I'll never forget the time a kid came up to me furiously upset that his friend stole his toy.... Seems relatively fair right?...
Until about 5 to 10 minutes later, when I finally calmed him down enough to discover that this supposed "toy" was an imaginary made up one...
REALLY?! Like you just can't imagine up a second one, or a few hundred spares? Turns out imaginary toy politics are quite strict.
Just Suffocate
For breathing too loudly. Grade 4. I wanted to just walk away for good.
Honestly, that's fair. Someone loudly breathing can be hell. And it could have felt impossible for that kid to focus on their work.
Bad Flavor....
awkward lucille ball GIFGiphyMiiiiiiiissssssss.... The girl in front of me in the line won't stop saying mint. He was correct, she was indeed repeating the word mint...
Here Kitty kitty....
Not a teacher, but way back in kindergarten I had a girl who sat next to me who hated my freaking guts. And she was a tattletale too.
Everyday in class, it would always be something like "TheatreKitty is looking at me! TheatreKitty is putting her notebook on my side of the desk!" It didn't help that I was a huge crybaby and would burst into tears when she told on me. She really screwed me up.
Wash Up!
"Miiisssss, they're teasing me because they're saying I sneezed and got snot everywhere and didn't wash my hands and now they're saying I have the lurgy and they don't want to touch my pencils."
"Well I did see you sneeze. Did you wash your hands?"
"No..."
"I don't think I can help you here... go and wash your hands."
Maggots Rule
Not a teacher but when I was a kid I was in an argument with my best friend.
He went home crying to his parents because I had called him a 'mighty maggot'
His parents asked why I would call him that.
'Because I called him that first' he responded.
Cue his dad calling me 'mighty maggot' for the rest of our friendship!
Need that Peach....
mean girls GIFGiphyTeaching 4th Grade I had to deal with an inconsolably crying child attempting to explain some traumatic event he was dealing with. Turns out Brian had said that Roblox was bad.
Another time teaching year 2, I had to move a child away from a group of girls as they were calling him gay. After moving him and having serious words with the group I noticed him sitting back on the mean girls' table.
Reason? He needed his peach crayon.
Crazy so young....
This is a true story. These were two 7th graders, a boy and girl.
Girl: sir i don't like how this boy is looking at me.
Boy: I am literally sitting at the back of the class.
The two were sitting at opposite ends of the class and couldn't make eye contact unless the girl completely turns around. Anyway girl stabs the boy with a pencil and made him bleed like crazy.
How old are we?
Not sure if this qualifies:
I had a student who always left class twenty minutes before the end. I had another student come to talk to me about this, like "I don't know if you've noticed, but this guy always leaves before the end."
So, two points about this:
This was an LSAT prep course. Everyone involved are adults, and it's a 100% voluntary course. If the dude wants to leave, OK, he leaves.
Also... he'd spoken to me beforehand. He had a solid medical reason for leaving early, and I'd email him with the stuff he was missing.
I was just pretty shocked at this 20-something trying to tell on another 20-something for truancy.
I'm Choo-Chooed Out!
I teach first grade. I had 2 boys that loved to irritate one another. The one boy, L kept saying "trains, trains, trains" over and over again. The other boy - B, kept telling him to stop it.
L moved across the room and stared at B. B stared back and then L yelled "do you know what I'm saying in my mind?" B interrupted my lesson yelling "L won't stop thinking about trains!" It took over 10 minutes to get them to knock it off. Longest year of my life.
So Smeggy....
GiphyMy son grew up watching Red Dwarf. I got a call from his 2nd grade teacher that he had called a classmate a "smeg head." The teacher told me "I don't even know what that means but wanted to tell you about it."
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Reddit user itchellFamily1045 asked:
"Which show do you think you're the only person who remembers it exists?"
It was David the Gnome for me (which I found out originated in Spain and was much more popular in France than it was in the US. Apparently I was a Euro-trash hipster as a child.) but let's take a look at what got Reddit.
Classic Wheel Of Fortune
wheel through the years GIF by Wheel of FortuneGiphy"It's funny how nobody seems to remember the early seasons of Wheel of Fortune with host Chuck Woolery. You didn't win any cash. You had to choose prizes from a selection of things set up in a room-like fashion."
- opus_4_vp
"They still had the prize room with sajak for a while I believe. Camera would just pan across the room and the winner would try not to pick the stupidest things. Cause the items all had fn price tags on em and you'd only have the $ amount you won. Infuriating"
- Frosty_Shoulder_7825
"A broyhill coffee table!!"
- atlantachicago
"Always ending up with the porcelain dog statue cause it was all you had left after buying expensive items."
- captainvancouver
Eerie
"Eerie, Indiana"
- dammagedone
"I still think about the episode where everyone who stayed young, slept in Tupperware, and when their lids got taken off, aged overnight."
- CatasaurusRox
"Foreverware!"
"One of my favorite moments on the show had Marshall and Simon hanging out in Simon's room, one night. Through the walls you can hear a man and a woman laughing lecherously."
"Marshall: 'It sounds like your mom and dad are having a party'."
"Simon: 'Mom's not home'."
"It was a great weird kids' show, but some of the gags they managed to sneak in were hilarious."
- rick_blatchman
"I work w a dude whose daughter was on that show, We were just randomly chatting and he was telling me how she had done some modelling/acting when she was little"
" 'you probably dont know the show but...'."
" 'like hell i dont that show was great'."
- cyzad4
Early Edition
"Early edition- get tomorrow's newspaper today"
- cmoney1142
"I loved that show! What a concept!"
- MortLightstone
"Omg omg omg"
- TumorYaelle
"Quality 90s tv, right there. A warm-fuzzy show."
- DustBunnicula
Herman's Head
talking marge simpson GIFGiphy"Anyone remember Herman’s Head?"
- ClemofNazareth
"It had the woman that does the voice for Lisa Simpson and the woman tat went on to play Ross' exwife on friends was one of the characters in his head."
- rhett342
" It has 2 Simpsons voice actors- Yeardley Smith and Hank Azaria. I seem to remember that they were offered the roles- and maybe the whole show existed? - because they didn’t want to be ‘just’ VA’s, and FOX wanted to placate them."
- mr_oof
"That’s a real show?? They reference it on 'only murders in the building'.”
- Bebosherry
"I came for this one too!"
- whitemest
The Garry Shandling Show
"The Gary Shandling Show. No, not the Larry Sanders Show - Gary Shandling Show. Even the theme song breaks the fourth wall."
- MrNegativity78
"This is the theme to Gary's show, the opening theme to Gary's show. This is the music that you hear as you watch the credits. We're almost to the part of where I start to whistle, then we'll watch It's Gary Shandling's Show."
- OGREtheTroll
"Yeah, Garry Shandling and Tracey Ullman are pretty much tied up in my memory."
- Handleton
"Best theme song EVER!"
- 2WheelFotog
"My partner LOVES the theme to that show! Plays it in the background every now and then, it's a riot!"
- FuzzyChrysalis
Wonderfalls
"Wonderfalls"
"Mid-2000s show on Fox that was apparently too weird even for Fox. I think they canceled it halfway through the 1st season."
- l8apex
"I have the DVD. Excellent show that I still toss in every once in a while."
"The producers had planned out some storylines all the way to S3. The S2 cliffhanger was supposed to be Jaye being sent to the mental hospital where she had helped put away some guest stars, including the woman who tried to kill the therapist with gift store items, and the boy who bought the russian mail order bride."
- DonnieJuniorsEmails
"Bryan Fuller's early work."
- bottledgoose
Mary Hartman Square
"Mary Hartman, Mary Hartman"
- Phuni44
"I remember watching this with my dad and my sister after the 11:00 pm news. I was in like 6th grade. That's what happens when there's no mom around. 😂"
- PJKPJT7915
"Her husband fell into a vat of paint thinner at work, and he needed to have plastic surgery over every inch of his body, so he requested to look like Tab Hunter."
- GuncleShark
"I thought her husband drowned in a bowl of soup. Maybe her first husband? That show was trippy af"
- Phuni44
"Her neighbor's husband. The clip is on YouTube."
- bitb
"Spin off of a spin off or Mary Tyler Moore as I recall, right? Wasn't Rhonda the first spinoff?"
- [Reddit]
"Not a spin-off. Mary Hartman was a very bizarre show for its time, a parody of a soap opera. Louise Lasser played Mary, and she was this weirdly detached character surrounded by crazy drama and violence. I think it might have been the first place I saw Martin Mull."
- rickpo
Terranova
"Terranova, ran for like a single season then disappeared"
- codyl0611
"I loved that show! So annoying they didn’t get a second season."
- LizHylton
"I was a young kid when it aired on TV so i dont remember much of it, but I recall it being a recurring topic with my mom every now and then"
- codyl0611
"oh god I’m old. I thought it was only a few years ago. I just looked it up and it was 11. Excuse me while I go get an AARP application."
- LizHylton
"It’s that old?! Holy sh*t, grab me an application too, please. It seriously felt like just a couple of years ago."
- KhaleesiXev
Room 222
"Room 222"
- HealthyTruck5691
"Karen Valentine was probably the cutest girl ever on a tv show. I used to love when she would be on the original Hollywood Squares."
"I'm old."
- Bartlett3313
"She was the only reason anyone watched that show."
- 7decadesofhistory
"I loved that show! My mom, my sisters and I would watch that show every Friday night. The cast was really good — Karen Valentine was a really cute and bubbly teacher, and Michael Constantine was great as the high school principal"
- CelticDaisy
Eureka’s Castle
"Eureka’s Castle"
- ofmiceandmodems
"Yes! I swear this was the first one I thought of! And Under the Umbrella Tree!"
- highmaintenancemama
"If you have the Paramount streaming app, it's on there!"
- vk2786
"Spicy, salty, sour, sweet, bring us something good to eat!"
- RoseyDove323
"I’m in my late thirties and still vividly remember the Christmas special episode where Magellan gets lost in the woods."
- doopcat
"Eureka’s Castle was the jam!"
- Vernon1031
"Euuu-reeekaas castleeee"
"*Worms going err errrr ER err ere rrr*"
- Ertuu1985
Let's talk about the shows nobody remembers but you.
Are they those early childhood favorites? Or maybe a teen-drama that only got one season before Netflix pulled it, crushing your hopes and dreams of resolved plotlines about a teenage ghost band who died of poisoned hot dogs and the incredibly talented, but heartbroken, young singer who gives them a new lease on life, love, and music?
No that is not a joke and YES I am still angry about Netflix not giving Julie and the Phantoms a second season.
Maybe it's a soap opera you think you remember watching with your mom, but maybe it was a fever dream?
Whatever it is, we want to hear about it.
Reddit user Tacoma__Crowasked:
"What was the oddest job you’ve had and why?"
Lemons for the Queen doesn't even begin to scratch the surface, honestly.
Weight Ballast
"In small rural town, I (15M) close to 200lbs got a job as a farm Hand expecting to work planting and harvesting. I was quite a large athletic lad at the time. And I show up for my first day of work and the planting equipment on the back of the tractor was missing some parts. So my boss told me to climb atop the planting equipment to make sure it would plant deep enough"
"FML I got hired to be a heavy object, weight, ballast."
"I will never forget my first job as weight"
- Logical-Tomato-215
"Heavy Weight Champion! Literally!"
- AK--03
"I didn't know that was a whole job, I've only worked as ballast in addition to my other duties"
"(theme park ride operator, and would need/get to ride the rides sometimes when they needed more weight on them for one reason or another)"
- Lowbacca1977
"that's nothing I'm so fat that people pay me to sit in the back of their car when it snows"
- HairyNutsackNumber9
"My dad used me for ballast when I was a kid. Growing up in upstate NY where we would get 12-24" of snow a day, he made a homemade plow for his lawn tractor."
"He had weights for the back drive wheels, but he needed weight on the front for the steer tires. a 50lb 5 year old who could sit on the hood of the tractor was perfect."
- SafetyMan35
A Google-izer Or Is It Googlee ?
evan peters google GIF by The Orchard FilmsGiphy"Googling stuff for people."
"I used to work for kgbkgb, which was this text messaging service where you could text a number, ask any question, and get an answer for $.99. This was before smartphones became super huge, so it was a bit of a helpful gimmick back then."
"However, for everyone that we got asking normal questions like movie times, or what restaurants were open near them, or stuff like that, we got A LOT more people asking very stupid things that I would have to Google. I have this album of a bunch of weird questions that people sent to us."
"It was an interesting job that helped cover some things when I was in college, but it also had me using Google for a lot of weird sh*t."
- -eDgAR-
"Oh my god, my friends and I used to send so many weird questions to services like that (never used that one though). It never occurred to me that an actual person was answering them, I always thought it was a chatbot."
- NightOnFu*kMountain
"Dude I totally remember that service! I'm so sorry I definitely asked stupid questions 😅"
- CptBarba
One Day
"I was employed by JC Penney for literally one day. I didn't quit, and I wasn't fired. That was the term of my employment."
"This was back in 1998 and I was entering my senior year of high school. They had a huge sale in the store and they hired dozens of people to cover every department because they were anticipating huge crowds. This was not a Black Friday sale, but they anticipated correctly, nonetheless."
"One of the shift supervisors gave me some busy work to start the day (folding shirts or whatever). After lunch I was basically asked to walk around from time to time and pick up any knocked over merchandise. The last few hours got boring, so one of the other supervisors that I had been chatting with throughout the day invited me to hang out during his break. His words were, 'what are they gonna do, fire you?' Good times."
- ThePreachingDrummer
"One of our local department stores (might have been Penneys) would hire a bunch of people for one day to do inventory. My wife, my MIL, SIL, and my Mom & I always got hired. We did it for 5 years, working one day a year, counting every damn thing in that store."
- Eel_OBrian
"Ha! I got a gig at Filene's over Christmas break one year doing the exact same thing. I think I had maybe 2-3 shifts, just walking around refolding shirts. So weird, but easy money!"
- RowdyGorgonite
Ring
The Ring Movie GIF by Arrow VideoGiphy"I was the girl that crawled out of a fake well at a Halloween hay ride once - that was actually pretty fun! Why: I was 14 and after four weeks working Thursdays, Fridays, and Saturdays all evening I got $150! (Under the table of course.)"
- CaseyBoogies
"Damn. Sounds like you got scammed on pay unless this was like the 80s or before."
- McFluff_TheAltCat
"Haha it was shady, but like I said it was fun! It was especially hilarious later in the evening when all the drunk college kids would come through and freak the f*ck out at me - a kid in a ripped up costume wedding dress- practically falling out of a cardboard well with a strobe light blinding me!"
"Most of the people that worked there were teenagers and we'd just have a good time and smoke in between wagons - pay was sh*t but it was definitely an odd job that made some good memories."
- CaseyBoogies
Corpse Uber
"Transporting deceased people who our county declared John/Jill Does to the proper county or city coroner once they were identified."
"Some obscure state law back in the 80's made it illegal to transport that particular type of dead person while the sun was up... Screwed up job, but it paid $15 an hour back in 1985."
"Guess it paid so much because most people were unwilling to do it. That was a hell of a lot for a college student to turn down. Interesting fact. When you hit a bump in the road, with an unprepared corpse, their bodies will gurgle, and sometimes air comes out of their lungs and hits their vocal cords."
- Leftstrat
"Were you warned about the gurgling or learn from terrifying experience?"
- mangokittykisses
"Got to learn about it. I guess it was a break-in-the-new guy kind of moment. The first time that I heard a moan, that about went out of the vehicle window."
- Leftstrat
"Did this show up in nightmares? How long did you do that for?"
- RPA031
3D Pictures
"When i was a teenager i sold those magic eye pictures at a mall kiosk. y'know the ones you have to stare at for a while till your eyes make out a 3d picture? all day i had to try and help frustrated people try and see the f*cking sail boat."
"Ah, you worked in a mall between 1993-1997."
- fiddlenutz
Fancy Title
"My first job was with a temp agency; worked in an accounting office going through boxes of records and making sure there were no staples or fasteners in anything. Then the boxes would go to another dept to be scanned onto microfiche. I had some fancy title (like “Accounting Clerk”) and was making over $11 an hr (back when min wage was still like $5 and change) so I thought I was living large."
"A funny part of the story is that I started on a Friday, and came to work in khakis and a polo-Monday I came dressed the same way and got spoke to about dressing professionally because Friday was casual Friday and not normal dress code. Lol felt dumb having to wear business attire and a tie when I was in the back in a cubicle pulling staples out of documents."
- HalfBeatingHeart
"The entire existence of casual Friday proves dress codes don’t matter. If you can do your job the same on Friday as you can on Monday, what does it matter?"
- dreamqueen9103
"Exactly. I haven’t had to wear a tie to work since 1998. And I’ve worked in some pretty stuffy places since then—two Federal Reserve Banks, the Chicago Board of Trade, and the most uptight law firm in the entire history of the legal system."
- dendiverdown
Cutthroat Cookies
episode 19 GIFGiphy"Worked for the girl scouts and ran the cookie sale for a regional area that included a major American city."
"Craziest and most stressful job I ever had."
"It seems all cute and charming until you have 30 furious cookie moms screaming at you in your office at 6:30 AM on a Saturday because the truck carrying 5 pallets of thin mints is stuck in a blizzard."
"I had to break up fist fights between parents because someone 'stole' someone's spot outside of a grocery store. It's cutthroat."
"Anyway that job was decades ago and I still have stress nightmares about it!"
- Neither-Copy785
"How is 5 pallets of thin mints stuck in a blizzard really a problem? Advertise those as already frozen and sell at a premium"
- Lowbacca1977
Kitty Sitting
Giphy"Not a job exactly but one awesome day. I used to work in the concrete business. We once had a job pouring a slab for residential parking and a neighbour nearby had a kitten just a couple months old."
"It would not stay out of the concrete as you can imagine it thought us picking it up and washing its paws was a game. Eventually the boss told me to grab the kitten and go hold it hostage in the truck."
"So I spent the next six hours sitting in the truck with a super friendly kitten sleeping on my chest. I got paid to babysit a kitten."
- Sectaguy
"Goals"
- Sirenenblut
Kept That Swamp clean
bathroom stall GIFGiphy"Swamp Janitor. Official title was "invasive species removal technician" but really I was a swamp janitor. "
"There was this invasive aquatic plant that would completely take over swamps and choke out all the native life, so my job was to go in with a rake and pitchfork and literally just clean up the swamp of this devil plant."
"Some parts were cool, watching eagles fish, seeing turtles come up for air and big fish swimming in the water but a lot of it sucked. The plant had sharp seeds that would pierce your skin and your waders. You'd get leeches, tics and mosquitos on you all day. Physically exhausting with lots of sun."
"You'd have to haul the plant matter to giant compost heaps that were full of snakes (for some reason the snakes liked it). It was a unique but grueling job."
- UniverseBear
"That sounds absolutely horrifying. How much did it pay?"
- Lemerney2
"Pretty sure it was min wage."
- UniverseBear
"What kind of plant was it?"
- borfmat
"European Water Chestnut (but in Canada, so no bueno)"
- UniverseBear
Okay so we've measured lemons for royalty, been a taxi for dead folks, and been an overpaid staple remover with a fancy title.
You're up, readers.
Got anything that competes with that?
Redditor jojomecoco was curious to hear what the men of Reddit considered the biggest obstacles and challenges which come with their gender, leading them to ask:
"Boys, what's the downside to being a male?"
What lies between one's legs...
"Getting hit in the nuts."- Phantomtastic
"Balls stick to leg."- BuffGroot
Societal Expectations
"All the expectations."
"'We must be swift as the coursing river, with all the force of a great typhoon, with all the strength of a raging fire, mysterious as the dark side of the moon'."- SparkAxolotl
"Our childhood interests don’t truly change much into adulthood, but we are often seen as childish if we continue to pursue them."
"One of my greatest laments is the magnitude of friends who said, 'when I grow up I’ll be able to afford..,' yet abandoned those dreams due to social conditioning."- nixxy19
nicksplat doug GIFGiphyDon't let a persona fool you.
:Being called a creep when you call a kid adorable."- OkraFit3987
Men like hugs too...
"I haven't been hugged in 14 years."- Delphii42
It can be hard for everyone...
"Whatever dating is now."- Thompson_S_Sweetback
lonely season 7 GIF
Ouch
"Almost never get compliments."
"Ever."- Redbeardthe1st
What are your intentions, exactly?
"I can’t be nice to women without them thinking I’m hitting on them or what have you."
"Like yeah you’re pretty but also, I’m just being polite."- pdeagz
When push comes to shove, sometimes we all feel like the world is against us, and we have to face an uphill battle.
But if one were to provide a study, the likely outcome would prove that men, namely white, cisgender, heterosexual men, often have a much less steep hill to climb than anyone else.
And though it might certainly be a different sensation, getting hit really hard between the legs is painful for everyone.
