Tattoo Artists Reveal Their Biggest "Oh No" Moments While Inking Someone
We all make mistakes. Usually, though, the products of our mistakes aren't permanently etched into someone else's skin. Tattoo artist unfortunately force their clients to live with their mistakes for their entire lives.
u/efergantes asked:
Tattoo artists, what was your biggest "oh sh*t" moment while tattooing?
Here were some of the answers.
Commemorative Ink
My best friend's father operated a tattoo parlor out of a small KS town at one point. He had two assistants, but typically was alone in the shop during non-busy hours. Had a client who came in reeking of hookah smoke (that thick, syrupy smell from the "double apple" brand of shisha that's so popular in fake-*ss hookah places). Whatever, guy's not inebriated and he has a design for a half-sleeve that looks pretty rad, so let's do it. About 2 hours in the guy on the table sniffs heavily and says, "Huh, I smell a lot of smoke." Well no sh*t dude, you're covered in hookah bar stank.
Nope, building next door's on fire. And these buildings are all right next to each other.
My friend's father realizes time is a factor and tells the guy "I'll do this tattoo for free (would have been about $800 otherwise with coloring) if you help me carry the expensive sh*t out of here before it burns down." Spends the next 5 minutes frantically loading said expensive sh*t into his truck bed before the building does indeed start to burn down (fire department got there about 15 minutes later, not too much damage but smoke everywhere and the building gets condemned later on).
Funny epilogue, once the new studio is up and running about 2 months later, hookah guy ends up wanting to pay the difference to update to a full sleeve and gets stylized flames all over the other half to commemorate the experience.
It's Like You're My Mirror
After a few years of tattooing, I had moved & started at a new studio. I was a pretty new hire at the time. I obviously wanted to show my employers I was competent.
One of the co-owners had a coworker/friend from his other job at a casino come in for some tattoos on her back. They were two tribal looking symbols, apparently in some Asian language (She herself was an immigrant & vouched for the meanings).
Long story shorter, I get a phone call about 2 weeks later. The lady was upset & insisted I had tattooed the symbols backwards! Mind you, I am very cautious. I always have my clients look at the design(s) on paper, sign off on paperwork, check the stencil before & after application. So, despite feeling pretty sure I didn't mess up the placement, I was a bit freaked out. I told her to come into the shop right away to check it out.
She came back in, and I pulled up the jpeg of her tattoo lines (I save everything). She confirmed they were correct. She went back to my station & showed me her back. The tattoos matched perfectly! She looked in the mirror and continued to argue they were backwards. Smh.
So, I took the paper with the line work & showed her. She agreed again that they looked correct. Then I showed her the paper in the mirror, next to her tattoos. Obviously, to me at least, mirrors show the inverse image.
This lady looked shocked, like I had just performed a magic trick. Well, despite being about 50 years old, she never realized mirrors will make lettering/images appear backwards. She laughed, and began to apologize profusely. Told me she'd tell my boss & everyone else that she badmouthed me for no reason.
I had one other lady experience thus years later. It took every member of the shop staff to explain to her how mirrors work.
The Entire Back
Back when my first tattoo artist was still in business I came in to get a tattoo done by his apprentice.
As she doing mine she tells me about the day before, she had had a lady pay to get Cinderella's castle tattooed on her entire back. My artist had spent the while week getting it ready. Lady comes in to get the line work done. They get towards the end of the session and this lady starts taking about how she cant wait to see what Snow White's castle looks like finished.
My artist told me she had a heart attack. This tat was massive and if it was the wrong castle there was no way to change it. She said she immediately started questioning the woman, totally panicked. Turns out lady had had a bit of a brain fart. She maent to say Cinderella. She apologized for the confusion and they finished the session without any more issues.
She said that after that woman said Snow White it was the most terrifying 5 minutes of her life.
One Jump Ahead
Not an artist but an artist who was working on me told me this story of something that happened in the shop:
The shop hired a new tattoo artist who was under the influence one day (they didn't know him too well so they didn't know if it was just his personality or not). He's working on this guy who is a hippie, stoned as all hell. He's tattooing a Tiger on him. Apparently he tattooed an extra leg by accident on the Tiger and when they were finished, the client was beyond irritated and goes "I don't mean to trip out man, but what's with the extra leg" the tattoo artist just looks at him and goes "he's just one step ahead of the game, man" the client, for some reason, got a huge kick out of it and ended up loving it and it ended there.
They fired him immediately.
It Happens
Was doing a cover up on a small wrist tattoo for a girl. After about a half hour she got kind of quiet and clammy so I asked if she wanted a break. I got up to take off my gloves and she slumped off the chair. Luckily I caught her and tried to wake her up. After about 5 minutes she came to and we got her a granola bar and she perked up. I was the newbie at the shop so all the other artists were laughing at me for freaking out over a passed out client.
It's Gonna Hurt
Ok, so..
Girl comes in fresh faced, just turned 18 and ready to make the step into getting a tattoo.
She was after a henna style lotus flower on the centre of her back.
"OK, cool" I thought.. Probably 2 hours work, tops?
Fast forward a few weeks to the appointment. Consent form has been filled in and signed. I put my old squiggle on the bottom.
She gets laid down after I've put the stencil on and I begin. She tenses up and says it really hurts. I reassure her that after the first 10 minutes or so it does get easier. At around the 17 minute mark she erupts into tears. Not just the odd tear but I mean hysterics. Her make up was running down her face and she was crying out at every line.
If any of you have played the remaster of Resident Evil, she literally sounded like Lisa Trevor.
I ask her if she wanted to leave it and maybe try another day when she felt braver. Through tears, she just said "No.. I need it done today."
Ok, right yep. So a two hour tattoo turned into a 3 and a half hour showdown of blood, sweat and (many) tears.
She hasn't been back since.
Backwards Island
Not me, but a friend of mine is a heavily tatted individual.
He was born and raised on Vancouver Island in BC, and as an homage he wanted to get an outline of the island tattooed across his entire back.
Went to the shop he had been going to for years but sat down with one of the new artists. She showed him the stencil of the tattoo on his back, with the help of a mirror. He ok'd the tattoo.
The artist was about 75% done the tattoo, she then lets out an audible 'oh sh*t'....
My buddy, thinking she maybe made a small error said 'no worries if one of the lines isn't perfect, I trust you'.
'No, *****, I think I drew the island backwards.'
What she had done was put the stencil on his back the wrong way, but upon showing him in the mirror it appeared that it was on correctly. He ok'd the tat and she went to town. At this point both of them start freaking out. He called me asking me to come to him immediately as he was losing his mind. The artist ran out of the shop crying and disappeared for the whole day.
The owner quickly came over and offered to fix the tattoo, which would now have to include a great deal of shading in order to cover up the previous mistake. In the end my buddy got free tats for life and now has a GIGANTIC tattoo of Vancouver Island on his back.
Skin Spellcheck
My brother in law got the oh so original 'death before dishonor' tattoo (ironically before he was dishonorably discharged from the army) and when it was finished we realized it said death before dishoron. The artist was able to fix it the best that he could but it still looks funny. It's fitting though. My brother in law is an idiot.
Nice Save
Not the artist, but the one getting the work done. I was getting a tattoo with a specific year on it, as well as a good amount of other detail around it. About halfway through I look down, and the year is completely wrong. Like, hundreds of years off. I was young and didn't like confrontation at the time so my heart just sank and I accepted my fate.
The artist seemed to become aware of what was happening, and said "Give me a minute." He left me sitting in the chair and went to the back of the shop. He came back a couple minutes later, proceeded to shade in the old year and put the correct year underneath the shading, and tied the entire tattoo together with that shading which ended up making it look even better than the original design. It worked out for the better in the end but for 10 minutes I was sure my tat was ruined.
An Intense Situation
Obligatory "not an artist", but my friends older brother used to tell us stories from his tattoo shop before class and a few stuck with me.
So, Jake was about 3 years into tattooing and he had seen some crazy sh*t. People screaming as though they had been shot, clients passing out, he had even been punched in the face because he was taking too long. But, hey, this is Vegas. Crazy sh*t happens. However one client sticks in his memory as his most frightening scare.
One day a client comes in with his friend and wanted something semi complex on his forearm. Jake freehands some nice sh*t (incredibly talented guy) and gets right to it. About fifteen minutes in, the guy starts bleeding a decent bit. That's clearly nothing shocking in a tattoo shop, but the amount is a little more than normal. After taking a minute to talk to the friend she tells him they'd been drinking. Most if not all artists will tell you not to drink before getting some work done due to the fact that booze tends to make you bleed more than normal. Jake adjusts his attitude and gets back to it.
About five minutes later the guy starts bleeding a lot more. Like, a LOT more. Jake stops and asks the guy what's going on. The dude confesses that he's got a medical issue with blood clotting. Jake is really bothered because no tattoo, even with cut skin, should be bleeding that much. He tells the guy that he can't finish and to see a doctor. While cleaning up he happens to catch a piece of the conversation they're having while they grab their bags.
"Shouldn't you tell him that you're poz?"
This client was HIV positive. And here Jake was wiping up a small pool of his blood. Needless to say, Jake was freaking out. Things escalate to shouting and the owner of the shop gets involved. Once the owner finds out he calmly ushers Jake out of the room and implores him to inspect himself for cuts. Jake gets obsessive and checks about a thousand times while the owner sternly informs the client that he should have informed them of his status. The client leaves and they clean obsessively for hours and don't let clients in that room for a couple days.
Guys, tell your artists about medical issues before hand, don't drink before getting a tattoo, and definitely tell them if you're HIV positive. Yes, good shops sterilize profusely but you should still let them know. It's for your safety as well as theirs and other clients.
Barring identical twins, no two bodies are the same.
Indeed, some people are born with rare or unusual elements to their bodies which very few, if any, other people also share.
While some people will go to great lengths to cover these up, or make them less conspicuous, others wear their unique elements with pride.
There are also people whose bodily oddity isn't visible, but instead have a unique genetic makeup, substantially affecting their daily routine for better or worse.
"What's unusual about your body?"
Shimmering Silver Hair
"My hair started losing its color when I was 10 years old."
"I used to be brunette."
"My hair has been completely silver and white since my 20s."- ConcernedApath3
gone with the wind waiting GIF by CRPTC CHILDGiphyMechanical Heart
"My heart is bionic at this point."
"I’ve had 4 open heart surgeries, aorta and mitral valves are now titanium."
"It makes a ticking noise like a clock."
"I’m only 30."
"Hopefully I live longer."- Tired-humanoid
Misplaced Anatomy
"When I was born, none of my organs were in the places they should be."
"Had 5 surgeries after birth to get everything moved around, and put to right places."
"Luckily, no issues since."- iMissTheOldKimye
"My internal organs are all flipped 180 degrees."
"So everything's backwards."
"Situs inversus totalis."
"Sorry I should've clarified better."
"Not flipped in place but completely mirrored."
"So organs are on opposite sides as well."- tr1ppymayyyyne
Saves You Trouble On Lint...
"Two of my toes on each foot are webbed halfway."
"The index(?) and middle toe, each side."
"Nothing else."
"I can’t swim any faster which I personally think is bullsh*t."- dirtyethanol73·
Sometimes One Is Enough
"I was born with 1 Kidney."
"But my 1 Kidney is the size of 2 combined."
"So I have 1 super kidney."- Jay12678
Switch and Swap
"I have a rare condition in which my large intestine is smashed over to one side of my torso and my small intestines are smashed over to the other side."
"The only reason we discovered it is that one day, they decided to physically switch places causing extreme pain."
"They have switched places a total of four times in my life."
"It's really painful and kinda gross hearing your goopy bits flop around inside of you."- jtolb65
Animation Eating GIF by FOUGiphyBetter Than A Growling Tummy...
"I sneeze when really hungry."- Scrum_Bucket
How Long Have You Got?
"Well, I am an achondroplastic dwarf, so lets see…"
"I’m 4’0” tall at 29 years old (male), I have disproportionately short limbs compared to my torso."
"I can barely put my hands in my trouser pockets because they are so short."
"I also need to get all my trousers cropped."
"3/4 length trousers can also work as full length for me."
"I have what is called 'trident hand configuration'."
"Basically my hands naturally split into the vulcan hand sign (like three prongs)."
"It’s a common way to identify achondroplasia in the womb and how I was diagnosed."
"I did have bowed legs."
"I needed to have my legs broken and straightened when I was a kid."
"That was fun."
"Can’t fully straighten my arms."
"Even when fully extended, they are slightly bent."
"Also can’t raise them much beyond my shoulder."
"Super handy when you’re 4 f*cking feet tall and everything is out of reach."
"Absolutely stellar."
"I have mono-lids despite being a white af Scottish guy in a family with no mono-lids."
"That and frontal bossing and a depressed nasal bridge is the package 'dwarf face' deal when it comes to achondroplasia."
"Guarantees that you’ll always get random strangers approaching you going 'aren’t you that guy from time bandits?'"
" Despite the fact that you were born in 1994."
"There’s more stuff but I could be here all day."
"Just to be clear - these are all symptoms of my dwarfism."
"It’s not like I’ve been super unlucky and got a bunch of unrelated conditions."
"Just one mutation can cause all this."
"The body is great isn’t it?"- Usidore_
They Have An Understandable Attachment
"When I was born my umbilical cord was inside out and it was the first time the hospital I was born at had ever seen anything like it."
"So they asked my mum if it could be sent to a nearby university to be shown to students in order to show them what the inside of one looks like in real life."
"I am going to that exact university next year and will be on a quest to take back my umbilical cord."
"Provided it's not been thrown away, idk how long they last." - Reddit
homer simpson panic GIFGiphyExplains Why They're Always Buying New Towels
"My sweat is extra acidic."
"I can fully rust guitar strings in a week or 2, and have eaten holes on 2 laptops where I rest my hands, both happened within a year of use."- MoofieFoofer·
Chronic Moisture
"I sweat too much."
"If my shower is too warm, I start sweating and once I towel off I'm just wet from sweating for hours."
"My wife complains about my cold shower water but it's how I don't completely render the shower pointless."- CubicalWombatPoops
One Hole Too Many
"Small hole at the base of my spine just before my a** hole."
"To clarify I’m not talking about the actual a**hole itself, I’m talking about a small hole an inch above it."
"It’s not a cyst I was born with it."- Happy-Watercress3232
GiphyWe can't choose the body we're given.
It is a shame that some of these unique traits result in people having added visits to the doctor, or an increased need for medicine.
But whether they're proud or ashamed of their bodily abnormality, they at least know they will always have a conversation starter which will instantly grab everyone's attention.
CW: Suicide.
When it comes to cell phone wallpaper, it can be a very personal choice.
Sometimes, your wallpaper is silly, like a funny picture of your and your friends. Other times, it's simple, like a monochromatic background.
Sometimes, it's the way you show your love for a particular fandom. As a huge Potterhead, it's no surprise that my wallpaper is a still image of the floating candles in the Great Hall from the first Harry Potter movie.
Sometimes, your phone's wallpaper is unique, and there's a story behind it. Those stories are what Redditors shared.
It all started when Redditor SPriGJade asked:
"What's the story behind your phone's wallpaper?"
The Name’s Logan
"Wolverine. Otherwise, a topless man as wallpaper is trashy."
– Deleted User
It Was Like That When I Got It
"They made the phone with a wallpaper. I bought the phone with a wallpaper. End of story."
"My phone is not personalized at all. Aside from 2 or 3 apps this thing is stock. No music, no ring tones, no wall paper etc."
– pay-this-fool
"You’re a NPC aren’t you?"
– Milfshake23
"Hello, Mr. Thompson"
"It’s the scene where Homer becomes Mr. Thompson. The moment where he says “I think he’s talking to you”"
– downwitbrown
The Same Name
"Mine was a fan art I saw on Instagram of Blossom and Brik. I happened to have a crush on someone who has the same name as him so I put it as my wallpaper. I cannot put his actual pic there cause I have nosey friends who will dice me if they knew."
– SPriGJade
Camp Wheezeaway
"It's a picture I took at sunset at asthma camp while I was in respiratory school. We hiked out to a dam to watch the sun set and everyone was silhouettes. I think it's beautiful."
– Faye_dunwoody
"Camp counselor: “Cmon little Timmy you gotta finish the mile run in order to pass!”"
"Little Timmy:”W H E E Z E”"
– Siriuswot111
Exposure Therapy
"Either I just wanted to get over my arachnophobia or just to discourage myself from looking at my screen too much. I don't remember lol."
– WingieWingies
Real Wallpaper
"I was renovating my home and i really liked the wall paper id bought and i still had some paste left over... Its a bit of a job to see my screen though /s"
– arianleellewellyn
If Found, Please Return To...
"it is black with green text with my contact info in case my phone gets lost... simple and practical"
– 1101base2
"I hope you made sure to put your phone number on that contact info so they can call you if you lose it..."
– johnnyboy10010
Nerd Culture
"I just like Pokémon"
– yuri_nomoru122
"I just like Star Wars
– Thrashed0066
And We Fell In Love
"Me & my wife's wallpaper (for the last 5 years) is an illustration I altered of two otters holding hands, but made to look very devil-like, with horns, pointed tails, and colored red. The story is, when my wife and I were dating early on, we liked that otters hold hands when they sleep, and we would joke, saying "Thank you Satan" for being responsible for our meeting on a dating app. So... it was a combo of both of those things."
– 1313trouble
Skin And...Oh, Wait, Just Bones
"My little girl had to get an X-ray of her hand/wrist… apparently you can tell if kids are aging/growing right by their wrist??? I took a pic of her skeleton hand… haven’t changed it since!"
– mic1383
Bird's Eye View
"NASA spent $250 million so I could have a tiny blue dot as my wallpaper."
– JustDunIt42
Finish The Task
"I was trying to find a new wallpaper, said screw it, and took a picture of the table."
– juse73x
Embodiment Of My Mood
"Played a game where the character is plagued by the embodiment of death during their quest, and as they finally finish their quest the Death catches them."
"My background is the main character facing the embodiment of death, still fighting. I put it up years ago when I first started feeling suicidal. I knew that it might kill me in the end, but I wanted to fight it as long as I could. I've been having a good couple of years lately, and I feel that I have won. But I still have it as my background."
– OkBottle8719
Crazy Idea
"My wallpaper is Eminem’s a**. i don’t know how to explain that. I just thought it would be silly."
– lethalload
Interesting...
"I asked an AI to show me the end of the world by the sea and it created this terrifyingly beautiful picture ."
– LovelyBones17
I might have to try something similar next time I want to change my wallpaper!
If you or someone you know is struggling, you can contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 988.
To find help outside the United States, the International Association for Suicide Prevention has resources available at https://www.iasp.info/resources/Crisis_Centres/Rules. Rules. Rules.
I get that we have to have rules and order.
Without all rules, we have anarchy and chaos.
But it feels like some schools just go overboard.
I mean, a principal is the head administrator, not a warden.
Especially when there are so many do's and donts that make absolutely so sense.
Redditor DekuSkrub18 wanted to hear about all of the rules that left people dumbfounded when we were students, so they asked:
"What were the dumbest rules put in place at your school?"
I can't recall a ton of silly rules at my school.
That was back in the 1800s though. Things have changed.
Stand Up
No Way Wtf GIF by HarlemGiphy"Students weren't allowed to sit on the floor in the hallways because it promoted sex."
Arius_de_Galdri
Oh!
"Something would happen: like a dropped tray or a book loudly hitting a table, and the whole cafeteria would yell Oh! The administrators hated it and would try and get us to stop. One week it happened a couple of times in a day."
"The assistant principal stood on a chair and loudly declared that if it happened again, they were going to turn off the vending machines. Of course, everyone yelled Oh! immediately. He angrily walked over and ripped the cords for the vending machines out of the wall… only to be met with a chorus of more Ohs!. It was hilarious but also incredibly stupid."
andronicus_14
Rewards
"At my primary school at the end of the year, there was a beach day for all students who had no detentions. Fine, I guess a reward for good behavior."
"But when you also have a policy of putting anyone who fights in detention regardless of who started the fight it becomes a bit unfair. You get picked on by a bully and you both get detention."
Mythical_Atlacatl
Funneled
"One-way system. You had to go around the entire school to go to your class that was directly next to your previous class. Also, the one-way system funneled all the students into one corridor, when if they could just go the fastest route they could avoid getting in each other's way. They used to say that the school was built in the 70s for much fewer students so the hallways were too small to let students walk where they want."
"So their solution was to funnel all the students down a single hallway. It didn't make sense to me."
Affiliations
"Our school tried banning 'gang affiliated' clothing. I can tell you right now the closest thing we got to 'gangs' in my school was one kid who listened to too much 50 Cent and Eminem, and another who actually grew up in Detroit but was about as clean-cut as they come."
"But oh no, my camo-patterned fall jacket? That I got at OLD NAVY? I must be in a gang. That lasted all of a month until about 1/3 of the school had been sent home for 'dress code' violations multiple times. It was utterly arbitrary and nobody cared except for a handful of the administration."
subtxtcan
Cheers
Cinco De Mayo Drinking GIF by WDRGiphy"The song 'Tequila' was banned because parents said it promoted underage drinking."
LordBaranof
But it's such a great song!
Hairy Situations
Long Hair GIF by Hollie KitchensGiphy"In our school, girls weren't allowed to wear their hair down. If any girl forgot to tie her hair, she was reprimanded. This really irritated the teachers."
Goddess_Gwendolyn
That's Exiled!
"It was always dumb when they would outlaw whatever the new cool harmless fad was. I remember when they outlawed snap bracelets, wacky cards and garbage pail kids, magic cards, etc. I think tomagatchies too."
wpascarelli
"We had both Pokémon cards and marbles outlawed because of people doing unfair trades. It was a bit of a thrill playing a secret game of marbles at the far end of the oval on lunch break once they were banned."
Special_Objective245
"It would disrupt the class. I was in school when Tamagotchis, yo-yos, Pokemon cards, and Yugioh cards were all a thing. I remember how it could be distracting or how kids would get into fights over them."
ibn1989
Skip Away
"If you are X minutes late, you must do the detention during your lunch break for the same amount of time."
"For example, if you came 5 mins late, you have to spend 5 mins doing detention during your lunch break."
"There was no detention if we don't show up to class. Basically, if you're late to class it's better to skip the class."
Goatmanthealien
Terrible
"No jeans."
skarlettohara
"My secondary school (U.K.) had a no jeans policy, our uniform was back trousers white shirt. I wore black jeans to school for the last 4 years. Would get pulled up about it from time to time. I’d just say 'Ah yep, won’t happen again' then continue wearing black jeans. Our school was utterly terrible."
minigmgoit
Water Sounds
noise GIFGiphy"We couldn't have metal water bottles because they might make loud noises if they fell."
Automatic_You4321
Color Lines
"That you couldn't dye your hair at all, even if you chose a natural color. They were so rigid that we kept our hair the color we started school off with that when one particular girl came back after the Summer holidays with brunette hair and revealed that the brunette hair was in fact her natural color, they made her bleach her hair back to blonde!"
Creative_Recover
Who thought any of these idea were valid?
Focus on more education please.
Anyone who doesn't have children yet will be told by someone how magical and beautiful being a parent is. Some will even argue that a person's life has not begun until they have kids.
But as some parents will point out, life as a parent is not made up of all unicorns and rainbows, and it certainly doesn't always smell like roses.
Redditor Roxane-Rose asked:
"What is the worst part of being a parent?"
The Constant Worry
"The worry that something horrible will happen to them. Sickness, kidnapping, getting lost, etc."
- MelbaToast604
"Which never, ever goes away. Ever."
- marvelous_much
"Honestly, that's all I ever think about. I have four kids (8, 7, 5, and 1.5), and all I want is for them to become good people."
"I let my fianceé know all the time, our kids will be adults longer than they are children, so we gotta make sure we establish manners, morals, and empathy. We also gotta make sure they have fun."
"I love those little monsters, even tho they're a headache sometimes."
- bafeom
Overrun with Illness
"Being sick as an adult f**king sucks. Being sick and having a sick kid, takes it to a whole new level of suck."
- axron12
"Kids have an incredible ability to get really sick during the most inconvenient times."
- jgiffin
"Four years ago before Christmas, my wife got sick and it turned into pneumonia. She was in the hospital for three days."
"Very scary. I guess. I wouldn't know, I had the flu combined with a stomach bug and both of our boys had strep throat. They were 13 and 8 at the time. They took their meds well as I had alarms set. But I was down and out."
"Day two, I went to a clinic that said stomach bug. On day three, my father (I'm 35 at the time) came and took me to the ER and my sister took my kids."
"It was a nightmare. I couldn't visit my wife in the hospital. My kids called my dad cause I was laid out on the floor. Just a f**king nigtmare. Being sick when your kids are sick makes you feel like the most useless parent in the world."
- normaldeadpool
Inconvenient Injuries
"Kids getting injured at the most inconvenient times. My wife and I had the flu this winter and my three-year-old decided she was going to help us feel better at 3:30 AM by making us tea."
"She got out of bed, went to the kitchen, and dropped a glass teapot on the floor, lacerating her feet."
"So I got to have the flu at the hospital while my daughter got stitches."
- pavorus
Staying Safe
"Always having to be extra careful so that you don't cause them to experience the consequences of losing a parent too soon."
"Sometimes I just want to be dumb and impulsive, and having to always be responsible puts a damper on that some days."
- AJSawASquirrel
"I stopped all of my hobbies because of worrying about my kids well being. I used to ride motorcycles and dirt bikes. I used to play in an adult hockey league. I used to love going to see a concert or sporting event and having a few and taking public transport back."
"Not anymore. And not again until they are fully… like 100% capable of living without my support. I’m 42 and my four sons range from 10 to 19. It’s gonna be another 20 years before I get on a bike again."
"I love them, but it sucks."
- Jcholley81
School Safety
"The worry of picking a preschool that has 'enough' security and safety measures in place has wrecked me."
"We toured the school my toddler will go to this fall and the first thing I asked about is security: locked doors, escorting the kids individually into/out of the building, etc."
"It makes me sick to the stomach that I have to worry about that."
- vk2786
Constant Meal Planning
"Figuring out three meals, 8,000 snacks, 1,000 activities, and settling for the fact they won’t like, want, or do any of them."
- BurThe___Down
"The meals and snacks exhaust me. Constantly having to bring snacks everywhere when they are toddlers, and now that they are almost teenagers they are hungry all of the time. It never stops. I'm always at the grocery or planning meals or cooking meals. It's insanity!"
- Feetyoumeet
"I love to cook, but trying to keep a family fed is exhausting. Once I became a mom, I really started to understand why some people hate cooking."
- KatieCashew
Minimal Me-Time
"No or little free time."
- MissingCalifornia-
"I'm an introvert, I really need my me time to recharge."
"And I have a five-month-old baby that needs me at every moment of the day. I can sometimes get away with leaving him alone during the last hour of his afternoon nap (with the baby monitor on, as he's started rolling and it frightens me), but that's it."
"He needs his mama at all times and throws a fit for anyone else. He won't even really eat or sleep when his grandma takes care of him. I foresee his first month of nursery school being very unpleasant."
- ClancyHabbard
"I find myself staying up a lot later than I used to just because of the fact that I've always enjoyed solitude, and these days, I have very little. So once everyone falls asleep I often lose track of time as, 'Just a few minutes,' to myself turns into two hours before I know it."
- Pristine_Interview86
A Child's Persistence
"Relentlessness. Kids don’t stop, they don’t go away, they always need to be fed, and cleaned, and entertained. They are always there, for 21 years+, they are always there. Every single day, every single hour. Kids are always there."
- Rkozlow
"'Raising children is like getting pecked to death by ducks.' I don't know who first said it, but they knew parenting."
"When the kids were young, my wife and I used to quietly say, 'quackquackquack,' to each other when the relentlessness got a little too stressful."
- PaulsRedditUsername
"I call my child 'The Terminator.'"
- Greatbrandino11
"'That kid is out there. It can't be bargained with. It can't be reasoned with. it doesn't feel pity or remorse or fear, and it absolutely will not stop… EVER, until you are dead!' - Kyle as a parent, probably."
- PaulClarkLoadletter
What Is Sleep, Again?
"Lack of sleep impacts your ability to do everything else so that’s going as number one."
" Number two, for me, is that sometimes, when they’re having a full-on breakdown because they don’t want to get in the bath they have literally every day on the one day you actually have to be somewhere, I look at them and really miss only taking care of me."
"I still love them, do not regret them, and would never ever tell them, but they make things so much harder than it needs to be because they do not give a crap about any priorities other than their own."
"When that happens I do some deep breathing and remind myself that they’re just little kids, of course, they don’t care about making other people wait."
- LastLadyResting
"The sleep deprivation."
"I'm serious, it wrecked me. I was already suffering from postpartum depression, and I was both breastfeeding and dealing with an unhelpful partner. I didn't sleep much until the baby was about a year old."
"Cognitively and emotionally, it destroyed me. I made stupid mistakes at work and as a parent. I didn't trust or like myself, or the baby."
"That's the number one reason he's an only child. I can't handle the lack of sleep."
"He's an amazing, creative, hilarious 15-year-old now; I love him and I love being the mom of a teenager. For one thing, he sleeps through the night."
- insertcaffeine
An Intro to Death and Grief
"Right now, for me... explaining the concept of death to my three-and-a-half-year-old."
"My MIL (Mother-in-Law) is having their senior dog put down this week, and we have to explain, gently, that kiddo is going to go to Grandma's this week and the dog who has been there her whole life will be gone, and Grandma is going to be sad."
"Also the constant worry and anxiety. That s**t eats you alive."
"(But then you look at them and snuggle them and realize you BUILT A PERSON and my god is amazing. It's a love you will never be able to explain.)"
- vk2786
Excess Funds
"Not me, but my best friend told me the thing he hates the most about being a parent is just not having any money for him to spend on his wife."
"Before they had kids, he would surprise her with little gifts every now and again and it would make her so happy. Now he's starting to feel bad now that he can't do that anymore."
- Author_Story_Teller
Disciplining Them
"The guilt when you have to stand up to your kids and discipline them. It's never fun to see them sad."
- AlwaysNipping
The Imperfections
"The worst part of being a parent is realizing that you're never going to be perfect for them. You're only human yourself. You're weak, you're tired, you're fallible, just like them."
"And as such, you'll do/not-do something and you'll blow it out of proportion and crucify yourself, and you forget that you're just still human too."
"And in that moment, in that lapse in judgment, you'll regret yelling at them, you'll wish you played with them a little bit better, you'll regret getting frustrated and impatient, and you'll regret criticizing them. You'll miss them, wherever they are, whoever old they are."
"The worst part of being a parent is that you can't save them from yourself. It's all in the game of life, and every second of it takes effort and thoughtful energy."
"Some days will be better than others. This too, shall pass."
- Rpark888
Trying to Relate to Them
"As a father, when they were too young and I couldn't connect with them."
"When they are sick, need to undergo an operation... even a blood sample or a vaccine, it really breaks my heart to watch that."
"When you think you are doing that parenting thing right, but somehow your kid does the opposite as you expected."
"When your partner and yourself are not on the same page in terms of parenting and it creates conflicts in the couple."
- borsky
All of the Above
"It depends on what you are already lacking in life."
"Don't have a lot of money? Wait until daycare bills add up."
"Don't have a lot of free time or get much sleep? Welcome to being a zombie for a few years."
"Don't have much patience? You will be tested with every fiber of your being to shake your baby when it won't stop crying. You absolutely CANNOT do this by the way. It's better to put it down in a safe spot for a few minutes till you can do a few deep breaths and calm down and come back a bit more level-headed."
"Have a difficult time agreeing with your spouse on plans or values? Get ready for divorce or for eternal resentment."
"Not much of a sex life? Welcome to celibacy."
"My daughter is the light of my life and I have so much joy with her now that she sleeps through the night and has a personality, but being a dad is hard and I occasionally find myself in a panic attack because I'm nervous for what the h**l I'm gonna do in August when the new one is born. We are privileged in many ways but it's still so hard!"
- GMaharris
Parenting can be a beautiful, life-changing experience, but that does not mean that it's perfect, and it's absolutely not for everyone.
Conversations like this are important for people to have before they decide to have kids, so they can make the best decision for themselves and avoid those situations where uninformed people have kids, only to resent their children for the rest of their time together, which likely would lead to going no-contact.