Tech people or "techies" as we sometimes affectionately call them are often thought of as the guys and gals who would wait in line for a Star Trek convention or the friend you can cheat off of in Geometry.
Basically, they're the nerds.
But the older we get the more we realize that those who are knowledgable are the keepers to the kingdom and that can be sexy.
Techies are our saviors. Most people have trouble getting a password to work. When we go to Apple or the Geek Squad, we are flocking to our saviors. But they are rarely ever treated that way because they are also life's punching bags.
And boy have they seen and lived through it all.
Several tech people shared some of their best war stories on Reddit and they are too good!
Reddit user self.talesfromtechsupport recalls how it's NOT always the server.
Here's another tale from the out of hours hell desk... This gem happened a few days ago.
Me: Service Desk
Caller: THE SERVER IS DOWN YOU NEED TO FIX THIS NOW
Me: Which server are you referring to?
Caller: THE SERVER!
Me: okay... what is it that you are trying to do?
Caller: TRYING TO ACCESS THE GOD DAMN SERVER
(yes, she was SHOUTING the entire time)
Me: Please can you stop shouting at me and tell me which server you are talking about or what it is that you are trying to do?
Caller: HOLY CRAP THE SERVER ISN'T WORKING. THE. SERVER. ISN'T. WORKING. YOU ARE WASTING MY TIME.
(In the background I've already loaded up our server monitoring tools - no alerts)
Me: I've checked our monitoring, I'm not seeing any servers as being down. Which department are you calling from?
Caller: IRRELEVANT. FIX THE GOD DAMN SERVER NOW.
Me: Can I get your Staff ID please?
Caller: IRRELEVANT. click
10 minutes later...
Me: Service Desk
Caller: HOLY CRAP THE GOD DAMN SERVER IS STILL DOWN!!! WHAT ARE YOU DOING ABOUT THIS?
Caller: EXCUSE ME? NOTHING?
Me: You still haven't told me which server is down or what is not actually working?
Caller: YOU PEOPLE! IT'S OBVIOUS MY PHONE ISN'T WORKING I CAN'T MAKE CALLS. THE SERVER HAS GONE DOWN YOU NEED TO CALL YOUR PEOPLE AND FIX THIS.
Me: Ma'am I can see you are calling me from your Desk Phone,
Me: and this is the phone you can not make calls from, correct?
Me: Do you see why I'm having trouble understanding the problem?
Caller: THE SERVER IS DOWN I CAN'T CALL
Me: Ma'am that number is 3 digits short of a valid number, that is why the call is not connecting.
Caller: LISTEN THE SERVER IS OBVIOUSLY DOWN. I'LL HAVE MY PEOPLE CALL YOUR PEOPLE ABOUT THIS! click
I love my job. I love my job. I love my job.
Macaveli54 and boss decided to have a little fun with the ridiculous.
So I had a customer call me up in mobile tech support with the problem that his data wasn't working for 20 minutes, pretty quickly I find out why; he had accidentally turned off his data on the phone menu (which happens a lot but usually the customer goes "oops silly me"). So this customer starts demanding that he want's compensation for his time without service and being very rude about it. After a couple of minutes he's not taking this is not something we did, but his mistake as a answer, so I get an idea, I tell him I'm going to go speak to my manager. I went up to my manager, explain what's happening, he says the customer's being ridiculous and I said,
"Listen I have this idea for him, are you okay with this?" then explain my idea.
"Are you kidding? Let me get on call listening before you go back, I wanna hear this."
I go back to the phone, he gave me the thumbs up that he was ready to listen and I proceed.
"Right sir, I just had a word with my manager and I've managed to swing something for you, so let's break this down, you pay us 39.99 a month for 3 services; calls, texts and data, so let's divide your bill by 3 that give us 13.33, so let's divide further by 30 days to gives 44 pence for your daily data, now you had your data turned off for 20 minutes but for the purpose of this I'll round it up to an hour so we just need to divide that 44 pence by 24 hours so that means your looking at compensation of 1.8 pence so let's just say 2."
I looked over at my manager during and he was covering his mouth laughing. Customer goes;
"Are you having a f@#*ing laugh?"
"No sir the math is there."
"............Go on then I'll take it"
Each of us is someone's IT person now and again.
LTLFTP+Hard to format on mobile.
Ok, so I am by no means an IT but the one who everyone in my family call when they need help.
So I get a call from my grandpa (89 yrs old) about a new win 10 laptop he just got and he needs help setting it up.
Now keep in mind he is the kind of person to blame the machinery if he clicks on the wrong thing so I already knew this would not end in a phone call - so I drove to his place expecting to see it still in the box. That was not the case.
When I arrive, I see him already in his desktop, after he somehow managed to install windows correctly on his own accord - and waiting for me while playing minesweeper. As he greets me, he freaking ALT+F4's to close the game and then tells me he cannot connect to the internet.
Not sure what happened in the week I wasn't there, I ask if he could show me the problem.
He then OPENS CMD AND PINGS HIS OWN CELLPHONE and then points at the 0 packets text to show me there is no connection.
At this point id probably look less surprised if I see an alien invasion.
So after showing him that you need to enter the password to connect to his home wifi, he then asks me how to see his email account again.
Still completely stunned, I show him how to access his outlook account and how to delete some messages.
And the craziest part- when I asked him how did he know about CMD his answer was: "I learned it from grandma". thegur90
Give me my recyclables!! WHERE ARE MY RECYCLABLES?!!
Hey everyone, thought I would share this tale from one of my IT buddies. He had this one woman that would always puts tickets in for the smallest things. But this one takes the cake.
IT - IT Buddy
CW - Confused Woman
IT saw a ticket had come in and it was from CW. It said: "You deleted all my files! I need them to do my job!" IT called CW to see what was going on because we don't delete personal files off of people's computers unless there is a good reason for it and we have the user's permission. So while he was on the phone, he remotes into her computer and noticed everything but the recycling bin was missing on her desktop. He noticed that there was files in the recycling bin, so he opened it and all her files are there.
IT: Here are all your files, did you move them into here?
CW: Yes I did, I moved them in here to recycle them so they will be clean for me to work on them.
IT: .....Excuse me?
CW: Yes, I move them to the recycling bin to make them new again so I can reuse the files.
IT: This is the trash bin, you would move files here to delete them off of your computer.
CW: IT IS NOT A TRASH CAN, IT IS A RECYCLING BIN! IT SAYS SO RIGHT UNDER THE ICON!
So for the next half hour, my buddy had to teach her how to use the recycling bin. thedarkavengerx
First post in quite some time! I work at a local authority on the helldesk. Social workers are the bane of my existence but you learn to cope with their general incompetence as part of the job. But sometimes they can still surprise you. This happened today.
So, we use a generic username for most of our computers so that people can log onto the machine, then from there they log into Citrix to work. Everyone knows the username and password for this. It's literally written on the walls in most areas, because the only thing it can access is another login page, so it isn't a security issue. Most of these accounts stay logged on at all times to save confusing the geniuses that work here. A guy rang up, said hello and asked for the generic login details. I've changed the exact username and password but other than that this is more or less word for word:
Genius: So what's the username?
Me: It's 'Computer'.
Genius: so is that the asset number of the PC?
Me: No no, it's just the word 'Computer'
Genius: And then backslash my name?
Me: NO. It's the word 'Computer.' C-O-M-P-U-T-E-R. Computer. nothing else.
Genius: And what's the password?
Me: It's 'P4ssword'. As in, the word 'Password' with a capital 'P', but you replace the 'a' with a '4'.
Genius: So it's 'Password4'?
Me: NO. It is not. It is 'P-4-s-s-w-o-r-d' With a capital P at the beginning. Everything else is lower case.
Genius: Ok, so the username is ComputerP4ssword. What's the password?
Me: NO. The username is Computer. The password is 'P4ssword'. That's everything. Just two words. Two boxes, two words.
Genius: type type type It didn't work. I typed in 'password' but it said it's incorrect.
Me: Spell out what you typed for me please.
Me: very slowly and clearly, in case it was my accent or something ... Like i said. CAPITAL P. NUMBER FOUR. LOWER CASE S, LOWER CASE S, LOWER CASE W, LOWERCASE O, LOWERCASE R, LOWER CASE D. P4ssword.
Genius: type type click Nope. And it says the account is locked. I used a capital P this time definitely.
Me: did you use a 4 instead of the a?
Genius: Use four whats?
I remoted to the machine and typed it in for him. He complained that the system was needlessly complicated. Bombadils
Yay, that about sums that up.
Every office has their special users. The ones who can't figure out anything technical, everything is an emergency, and everything has to function exactly the same or they can't work. At my job, it is the HR lady. Since she is just HR, all her problems boil down to a printer error, excel, word, reboot and it works type of issues, and since I am the System admin they are all my responsibility.
However, every issue she has she comes back to IT, walks right by my desk goes to the programmer, manager, network admin and explains the issue. Every time they either tell her to go me (even though she gets bitchy), or relay the info to me to fix.
A few weeks back, she had a problem with the calculations on an excel spreadsheet. Everyone was at lunch, so she's forced to ask me. Immediately, I say it is probably rounding up or down because it is only off by a penny. This doesn't suffice, so she ignores me and waits until lunches are done to return. She goes to programmer guy and like usual, he passes it to me. I email her with a breakdown showing how it is rounding. She still wants programmer guy to look at it, so my manager responds with a message saying he will get to when he can.
Well, programmer guy is swamped, the new website launch is getting pushed out, her excel "problem" gets shelved with her emails coming ever more frequent. My manager even resends my explanation, but she wants programmer guy to look at it. This is unacceptable, so she goes to the VP saying we aren't helping her.
My boss sets up a meeting with the 3 of us for me to explain the issue. It was the shortest meeting ever because I start explaining it and our VP completely understands right away. The VP cuts me off, looks at HR lady and says "You pulled me into a meeting for this shit?"
TLDR; HR lady with easy issue ignores obviously solution only to be burned by VP. self.talesfromtechsupport
Seriously, techies have the patience of Gob.
I witnessed this astounding IT meltdown around 2004 in a large academic organization.
An employee decided to send a broad solicitation about her need for a local apartment. She happened to discover and use an firstname.lastname@example.org type of email address that included everyone. And by "everyone," I mean every employee in a 30,000-employee academic institution. Everyone from the CEO on down received this lady's apartment inquiry.
Of course, this kicked off the usual round of "why am I getting this" and "take me offa list" and "omg everyone stop replying" responses... each reply-all'ed to email@example.com, so 30,000 new messages. Email started to bog down as a half-million messages apparated into mailboxes.
IT Fail #1: Not necessarily making an firstname.lastname@example.org email address - that's quite reasonable - but granting unrestricted access to it (rather than configuring the mail server to check the sender and generate one "not the CEO = not authorized" reply).
That wasn't the real problem. That incident might've simmered down after people stopped responding.
In a 30k organization, lots of people go on vacay, and some of them (let's say 20) remembered to set their email to auto-respond about their absence. And the auto-responders responded to the same recipients - including email@example.com. So, every "I don't care about your apartment" message didn't just generate 30,000 copies of itself... it also generated 30,000 * 20 = 600,000 new messages. Even the avalanche of apartment messages became drowned out by the volume of "I'll be gone 'til November" auto-replies.
That also wasn't the real problem, which, again, might have died down all by itself.
The REAL problem was that the mail servers were quite diligent. The auto-responders didn't just send one "I'm away" message: they sent an "I'm away" message in response to every incoming message... including the "I'm away" messages of the other auto-responders.
The auto-response avalanche converted the entire mail system into an Agent-Smith-like replication factory of away messages, as auto-responders incessantly informed not just every employee, but also each other, about employee status.
The email systems melted down. Everything went offline. A 30k-wide enterprise suddenly had no email, for about 24 hours.
That's not the end of the story.
The IT staff busied themselves with mucking out the mailboxes from these millions of messages and deactivating the auto-responders. They brought the email system back online, and their first order of business was to send out an email explaining the cause of the problem, etc. And they addressed the notification email to firstname.lastname@example.org.
IT Fail #2: Before they sent their email message, they had disabled most of the auto-responders - but they missed at least one.
More specifically: they missed at least two. sfsdfd
Sometimes people should come with warning labels.
Last year, Help Desk got a call from a user complaining that the laptop we issued him would not read DVDs. He was one of those "I'm a very busy and a very important man, and I don't have time to follow your troubleshooting steps over the phone. Just fix it, dammit." kinda guys, so he said he would get someone to drop off the laptop at our office and pick up a loaner.
We received the laptop a couple days later, there was a note attached saying that now it wasn't even booting into Windows anymore. Sure enough, he was right - it didn't even attempt to load Windows, and instead we were greeted by the "Non-system disk or disk error" message. It sounded and looked like the PC was trying to boot from the DVD drive instead of the HDD.
We opened the disk tray, and saw the culprit. There was a DVD in there, all right - but it was placed upside down.
We flipped the disc over.
He was trying to watch "Dumb and Dumber". brenkelieshere
Nothing lasts forever!
This comes from the wonderful world of home security systems customer support. My coworker fields this one.
$CW is coworker.
$GOG is grumpy old guy.
$CW: "thank you for calling Blah Blah Blah Security, how may I help you?"
$GOG: Gives name, address, password, blood sample of first born for verification purposes. "Well my system isn't accepting codes and won't turn on or off. I think it started after the storm that came through last night."
$CW: "Did lightning strike your house or close by?"
$CW: "I see. Based on the age of the system, it probably took a surge. We're unable to get replacement parts anymore, so you'll need an upgrade. I can get someone in sales to call you with a price."
$GOG: "Well can't you just send someone out to fix it?"
$CW: "We certainly can, but as it's obsolete equipment it's unlikely they can repair it. You'd still be billed for the service call."
This is where the customer gets irate
$GOG: WHY WOULD YOU SELL ME AN OBSOLETE SYSTEM???
$CW: soft voice "Well Sir, it was brand new in 1986." DaWayItWorks
JurassicJeremy It's been a bit since I've posted, so quick rundown. I work for a small software company doing IT and customer service work supporting the users of our order-writing software.
We brought on a new company 6 months or so ago, and along with it, came a sales rep we'll call Virginia.
Virginia is 75 years old, "not good with computers", but has the best sense of humor and understanding I've ever had from a client. Every time she calls in she's always got something to say, which usually ends in a "I hope you've got your Vallium nearby!", And considers us all Wizards.
We recently updated our software, and sent an email out notifying users of this. She calls in yesterday, and we chat it up while I explain to her that yes, this was a real email, not spam, and that she should in fact update her program.
She says "Ok, I'm going to try to be a big girl and update this myself, but stay by the phone!"
A few minutes go by, and the phone rings, sure enough, it's her on the Caller ID, so I pick up without using the standard greeting, and say "Hey, Virginia!"
She responds, "Darn, how did you recognize me with my hat and fake mustache on!?"
I lost it for a bit. Having a long week full of incompetent, ignorant, or intentionally destructive users was washed away because this little old lady told the most Dad-like joke over the phone.
TL;DR - Not all old users are bad, especially if they can laugh at themselves.
nagol93 So, I had to walk a client through setting up a printer over the phone. Which required her to set an IP address to the printer. Also she is not tech smart at all.
Me: "Ok, do you have a usb cable? Sometimes they come with the printer"
Her: "No, im looking in the box now. Theres no usb cable. Only the printer and power"
So it needs to me networked, great. I walk her through getting the printer on her network
Me: "Ok, do you see a place to enter 4 numbers?"
Her: "Yep, its right here"
Me: "Ok the number is 192.168.0.3"
Her: "Ok, I put in 19216803. Whats the 2nd number?"
Me: "No, lets start over. The first number is 192, second is 168, third is 0, and fourth is 3"
Her: "Ok, so 192.168.03?"
Me: "No, the third number is just 0, the fourth is 3"
Her: "So, 0.0.0.3?"
Me: "no, 192.168.0.3"
Her: "But what about the 0?"
Me: "What about it?"
Her: "Shouldn't it be a number?"
Me: "0 is a number"
Her: "Look this it to complex for me, cant we just use the cable it came with?"
Me in my head: WHY DIDNT YOU TELL ME YOU HAD A CABLE!?!??! YOU SAID YOU JUST HAD THE PRINTER AND POWER CABLE!
Edit: I should say, this is the shortened version. IRL this conversation went on for 30 min and this ticket lasted 2 days.
Edit2: I said "Zero", NOT "o" and I said both "period" and "dot"
Some people just need an exorcism!
self.talesfromtechsupport backstory - I do end user implementation, training, and support for a web application that was developed by my firm. Our clients skew older.
client: I can't get into my account. My login isn't working. This is ridiculous. I've been trying for hours and now I'm locked out.
me: My apologies for the inconvenience! I've just reset your password. You should receive an email with a link to set and save a new password in a moment.
c: I don't want to set a new password. I liked my old password. It's the same password I use for everything else and it's easy to remember.
me: My sincere apologies, but you will need to set a new password in order to gain access to your account.
c: Can't I just use my old password?
me: No, our data security standards do not allow that. However, if for any reason you aren't able to follow the password reset link, I would be happy to generate a random password for you, and share it with you over the phone.
c: Do that, then, and email the password to me.
me: Again, my apologies, but part of our security policy states that we cannot email passwords in plain text. I would be happy to give you a call and share you password with you over the phone.
c: Why are you being so difficult? I just want my old password to work again.
me: Sir, I'm so sorry that this process has been frustrating for you. I want you to have access to your account. Have you followed the link in the password reset email?
c: No. It looks like a virus. I don't want to click on it.
me: I can assure you that it is not a virus. It is a hyperlink. You can just click on it, and it'll open a page in your browser where you can reset your password.
c: That's ridiculous. That's so much work. Why do you make it so hard? This should be simple. I want to speak to your manager.
me: (eager to pass them off on someone else) No problem. My manager is cc'd. He would be happy to assist you.
manager: How can I help?
c: Your employee is rude, stupid, and not helpful. I just want to log in, I don't want to reset my password, I don't want to click on this virus she sent me, and this is taking forever and it is ridiculous.
manager: Sir, respectfully, we are going to need you to meet us halfway and change your password.
client: (in all caps, this is via email) THIS IS BULLSHIT. I DON'T WANT TO CHANGE MY PASSWORD. YOU ARE IDIOTS.
manager: Again, we are sorry that this is frustrating for you. Please let us know what we can do to help.
Manager cc's client's boss, the director of their org and the one whose signature is on the contract. My manager does not take shit from clients.
client's boss (to their employee with us cc'd): Are you serious? These nice people are doing everything they can to help you, and you are abusing and belittling them. This is an embarrassment to our organization. You owe them both an apology, and you need to reset your password, stop complaining, and log in so you can get me that report that was supposed to be on my desk yesterday. The fact that you've wasted your entire day on this is ridiculous and this will definitely be included in your performance review.
My manager and I were in tears. Client's boss was savage af and did not pull a single punch. The client did end up resetting his password but did not apologize. Last time I sent out an email to clients, his bounced. His ass got fired. evil cackle
No. I'm Spartacus. NO! I'M SPARTACUS!!
Here's a weird one that happened the other day...
Me: Hello this is the IT department.
Evil Clone: Uhhh, no this is the IT department, what can I help you with?
Me: No sorry there's a mistake there, this is the IT department you've called, what seems to be the trouble today?
Evil Clone: Sorry I think there's some confusion here, you've called the help desk for (REDACTED COMPANY).
Me: You're right I am confused because I work the help desk for (SAME REDACTED COMPANY). My phone rang so I answered it.
Evil Clone: My phone ran too...so I answered it.
Me: So now here we are...talking to each other...
Evil Clone: Are you working from the (REDACTED STATE) branch?
Me: No, I'm working in the (REDACTED STATE ON THE COMPLETELY OPPOSITE SIDE OF THE COUNTRY) branch.
Evil Clone: This is weird...
Me: Yeah...soooo talk to you later then?
Evil Clone: Sure, have a good shift.
Me: You too. Bye.
Seriously...who was phone? therobotjeff
Ok so this little gem started yesterday, currently working in managed print industry - customer logs a call saying no devices in a building are working, so definitely server/software related.
I log in with their IT, the server is freezing and when logging in with a new account there is a disk space error. So i inform him he needs to clear it down or add some HDD space and we can then troubleshoot anything if there are issues once its done.
Call the end user who logged the call, and let her know but... it makes no sense to her, depressing conversation occurs:
Me: Morning, just calling regarding your printing issues at site X, its due to a server fault your IT are looking into - they should hopefully have it resolved soon which will likely resolve your issues.
User: Oh, well the printer still isnt working, none of them are, this is URGENT.
Me: I understand, but your IT is looking into it due to a server fault and should have it sorted as soon as possible.
User: Ok, so when are you coming out to fix it?
Me: I would not be able to fix the machine on site, it is a server issue as its run out of disk space, and your IT are looking into it.
User: This is urgent the ENTIRE site cant print, whats the ETA on the fix?
Me: I am not your IT so i am unable to advise, you would have to call them as they need to resolve it.
User: I need an ETA to inform the users and management.
Me: Im not in your IT so i cant give an ETA unfortuantely.
User: Talk to my manager.
Manager: we need an ETA for the fix or send someone on site, i want this actioned ASAP.
Me: I'm not your IT, i'm from the managed print support company, the issue is with your server and your IT are looking to fix it. An engineer from us wont be able to assist.
Manager: So you are categorically stating YOUR print engineer cant fix the printer? What kind of support is this?!
Me: The issue isn't with the printer, its with the server the print software is on, which your IT are looking to fix urgently.
Manager: No, the PRINTER is not PRINTING so its a PRINTER problem, we don't have servers.
Me: You do have servers, it's what governs the pull print and login for the devices, and it's currently down, your IT are looking to fix it.
Manager: why are you refusing to fix this? You can't just say no we have a support contract!
Me: Your IT fix your servers, we fix the printers and the software thats on the server. You need to call your IT.
Manager: Im escalating this to my director - expect a call back shortly
Had several calls since then i have ignored - informed their account manager whats going on - this is now his mountain of stupid to deal with.
Tl:DR printers don't work - server has no space on C drive, IT fixing - IM NOT THE USERS IT TEAM. Ten_DU
Lesson to walk away with?
Be nice to your techies and they'll be nice to you. Or, get a therapist and some Xanax!
Conspiracy theories are beliefs that there are covert powers that be changing the course of history for their own benefits. It's how we see the rise of QAnon conspiracies and people storming the capital.
Why do people fall for them? Well some research has looked into the reasons for that.
The Association for Psychological Science published a paper that reviewed some of the research:
"This research suggests that people may be drawn to conspiracy theories when—compared with nonconspiracy explanations—they promise to satisfy important social psychological motives that can be characterized as epistemic (e.g., the desire for understanding, accuracy, and subjective certainty), existential (e.g., the desire for control and security), and social (e.g., the desire to maintain a positive image of the self or group)."
Whatever the motivations may be, we wanted to know which convoluted stories became apart of peoples consciousness enough for them to believe it.
Redditor Lopsided_Confusion57 asked:
"What's the wildest conspiracy theory you fully believe?"
We can't say any of these are true but sometimes it's fun to speculate.
The time traveling cyclist.
"The Australian cyclist Mick Rogers is a time traveler."
"In the 2002 Tour Down Under, Rogers was in a great position in the breakaway and looking to move into the overall race lead but a collision with a motorcycle left his bike out of commission. With the team service car and mechanics way down the road, it looked like Rogers' chances were gone. Then a cycling fan, who just happened to be at that precise point in the road, offered Rogers his bicycle to continue on. The bike also just happened to be the *exact* model of Colnago that Rogers had been riding. It was the correct size, right down to things like the stem and crank lengths. It even had the same pedal system that Rogers was already using, so he could just clip in and be away. He finished that stage and took the race lead, which he held on to all the way to the end for his only career win in his 'home' tour."
"My theory is that in the original timeline, Rogers didn't win the 2002 Tour Down Under. He quit cycling in anger and devoted his life to theoretical physics and solving the problem of time travel just so he could arrange it to leave himself a spare bike where and when he needed it."
"I'm on board for whatever book or screenplay you write."
"Wait, so if Rogers motivation to find ways for time travelling was losing 2002 race, and if he won, then Rogers never found time travelling and our time line is forever devoid of genius like Rogers who would have found time travelling and attended Hawkins party."
"Yep, exactly. Our timeline is stuck with boring old Mick Rogers, 2002 TDU winner and 3x World Time Trial Champion while some other, much cooler, party timeline gets Mick Rogers, the second coming of Einstein. He probably even cures Covid for them."
The best money making stunt.
"Information is leaked from a studio about an upcoming project that p*sses off the fan base. The studio will then change things to keep the fans happy. The conspiracy is the original leak was just a lie to drum up free publicity for the project."
"This made me think of the Sonic movie. No way in hell were they going to make Sonic look that bad. Put out a fake trailer with him lookin all scary, everyone is talking about it. Wala. Take a bit to say you're fixing his look, put out a new trailer. You just drummed up tons of publicity since people are now following the story."
"I have mixed thoughts to that one."
"I mean 'No way in hell were they going to make him look like that.' Buddy have you seen the cash-grab BS that Hollywood has pulled off before? Hell, when was there a movie based off a game that wasn't exactly as bad as that Sonic looked?"
"I will admit that they may have done that as a publicity stunt, but I also admit that they could have thought it looked fine."
"Have you seen … CATS?"
"100% of the population believes that Putin has had people killed for political reasons but only a very small percentage of Americans believe that American politicians would ever do so."
"I mean, there's a reason the joke/saying is, 'The highest award a journalist can receive is being assassinated by the CIA.' There's probably been a handful who may've found out one too many things on the elites, and then had an accident before they could publish their findings."
"Ohhhh boy then south american journalists in the 60s-80s have been awarded way too much."
"MLK was literally murdered by the government."
"Lots of Black Panthers were too."
'"As part of the larger COINTELPRO operation, the FBI was determined to prevent any improvement in the effectiveness of the BPP leadership. The FBI orchestrated an armed raid with the Chicago police and State Attorney on Hampton's Chicago apartment.'"
"Quote from the Wikipedia article on Fred Hampton."
Conspiracies for the conspiracies to cover up the conspiracies.
"The CIA creates conspiracy theories to provide cover for the real conspiracies."
"It's actually kind of scary how smug anti-conspiracy discourse is used to derail actual conversations. A moment that chipped my faith in humanity just a little was when I was arguing with some people about Guatemala in 1954 and people denied my version of events happened 'because it's a conspiracy.'"
"Like no the parties involved admitted to it."
"If you don't know what I'm talking about and are from the USA you should have a google. But, basically the USA destroyed a democracy because it made a corporation sad."
"What's worse is when people will talk about how corrupt insert what politicians they don't like are, but then when you mention something that is actually confirmed to have happened, they pull the conspiracy theory card and act as if the idea people in power don't want to secure further power for themselves."
"We have been conditioned to think like that from since we started school though (I guess that's my submission for this ask post)."
"I think I remember reading about some CIA agents AMA. Someone asked him the question, 'What's the point of area 51?' The answer was, 'To keep your attention away from area 50 and 52.'"
"Obviously not an exact quote, but the idea of it has always stuck with me."
Extinct animals not actually being extinct for preservation.
"I think it is entirely plausible that the Thylacine still exists in the depths of the Australian mainland and the government knows it."
"It wouldn't be that crazy for misguided scientists to have moved or released a few in the late 1800s. Once the animal went extinct, they certainly couldn't reveal the existence of the mainland population lest poachers and local farmers destroy it. They also may have realized how significant the liability was for releasing large predators into farmland."
"Folks have found hair and scat samples that may be from the animal, but the university lab results always come back and say they are nonsense. That's probably the truth, but I wouldn't be entirely surprised if the government was strong-arming them into reporting BS results. TBH if I was a conservation scientist it wouldn't take much convincing for me to fake a negative test."
Robert 'Curt' Borton Jr.
"I believe in a LOT of really boring conspiracies. Stuff like. 'This person was about to expose corporate/government corruption, and then died suspiciously.'"
"But if you want to go for a more intense one, Robert Borton, who I just learnt about, takes the cake. tl;dr guy disappears in Vietnam and really strange sh*T happens to his family."
"This guy, Robert 'Curt' Borton Jr. turns 19 in 1965, he goes to fight in Vietnam. He lands in 1966 and vanishes 19 days into his deployment alongside 3 other soldiers."
"In 1976, two guys approach his dad and claimed to work for the Department of Defense. They asked him to sign a letter that would change his sons status from 'Missing in action' to 'Killed in action' and he refused. Arguing the military would not confront people in public to sign documents. However, in the following weeks he was approached again by these two guys in public places and eventually signed it out of fear. He later received money for doing so."
"His sister then claims that every time they've seen Curt's official files, the entries keep changing, and his sister claims her phone was being wiretapped. A cousin believes that everyone was being watched, claiming that he was followed to work several times and that two men would follow him from his home to his company and then back. After this went on for a month, he decided to confront them, but they denied following him. After that, for about a month, he was not followed."
"The family is convinced Curt was part of a secret government operation that brought him from Vietnam into the United States. Diane believes that he has tried to contact her and other family members on multiple occasions. She claims that she has talked to a man who is a "secret returnee" and that they are allowed to come back to the United States, as long as they do not contact their families. She believes that this was done because the U.S. government had already claimed that all of the living POWs had been brought home; since they were still left behind, they could not become known to the public."
We may never fully know if any of these are true. Given the track record and history of most governments in the world, maybe some of these aren't so far fetched.
Only you can decide what you believe or not.
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I hate ghosts, even if it's Casper. My life is already stressful enough. I don't need to creeped out by spirits from the beyond. Shouldn't they be resting and basking in the glow of the great beyond instead of menacing the rest of us?
The paranormal seems to be consistently in unrest, which sounds like death isn't any more fun or tranquil than life. So much for something to look forward to.
Some ghosts just like to scare it up. It's not always like "Ghosthunters" the show.
Redditor u/Murky-Increase4705 wanted to hear about all the times we've faced some hauntings that left us shook, by asking:
Reddit, what are your creepy encounters with something that you are convinced was paranormal?
I can't definitively say I've come face to face with the spirits. But I have had some unsettling feelings in the dark. Shadows are just shadows sometimes, but who can be sure.
I hear it...Nbc Wings GIF by HULUGiphy
"I was helping my dad clean my grandma's house after she passed and I went in and was trying to find a song in my phone and before I could I heard a cough plain as day come from down the hallway where her room was. She died of lung and throat cancer it was pretty crazy."
"When I was 5 I remember getting home from my grandpa's birthday party. For context my mom was pregnant with my brother at the time, so my parents had already bought his crib. I woke up in the middle of the night to find a women in a white dress and long black hair standing over my brother's crib. I managed to wake up my dad so he could take me to the bathroom. When I got back it was still there. It was only until morning when it disappeared. Every now and then I see a glance of what I assume is that thing running past the backyard."
"My best friend and his wife had moved to a new apartment. I came over to visit a few times, and each time I'd see the motion of a cat in my peripheral vision. Not the image of a cat, but a sense of how a cat moves. Anyway, one day I finally cracked some joke about the ghost cat in the place and his wife was instantly saying "See! See! I told you we had a ghost cat!"
"I worked graveyard shift in a dementia ward for 4 years and it was anything but quiet. I was working with a nurse one night when we both heard a resident say "excuse me." We looked around and no-one was there. I checked on the resident in question and she was fast asleep in her own room. Many of us also experienced someone whistling in the ward late at night and one nurse even managed to catch a video of it happening. It was unnerving to say the least."
"I once saw someone short walk by me in my house. They walked into the laundry room which only has one way in. I walked into it behind them and they where gone. I thought it was my little brother but I went to his room and he was asleep. I still have no clue what that was."
Now was everyone here positive they were sober? Just asking. Those are certainly spooky moments. I'd like some video footage please. Continue...
Reflectionsghost library GIFGiphy
"I was up at 3am when I was maybe 7 or 8. I looked out the window and saw a woman in a white dress run across my yard. I could see through her. She was transparent like the reflections on the window."
"So, my work place is haunted. I was having a really crap day, and as a cleaner, it's normal that me and my co worker will be the only ones left at night. So I was standing on the second floor, leaning on the banister for the stair case, when I heard this male voice say in my ear "you alright?" Clear as day. I turned around so fast and nobody was there and it scared the hell out of me."
"I remember as a young kid I usually use to sit in my bed and watch tv with my room door open while the adjacent guest bedroom next to mine would always have the door shut. I always remember seeing that door fully open and close by itself multiple times a day very slowly and gently. Never really bothered me much now that I think about it… but there were other creepier experiences I had in the same house that made me feel uncomfortable like I was being watched."
"I went to the Betsy Ross House as a really little kid in the early 90s. Normal house but I was confused why the tour guide never talked about the woman on the chair crying at the edge of the bed in Betsy Ross's bedroom. So I asked about it. No one else saw the woman at the edge of the bed. I figured it was just a wax museum since there was a wax statue of a man in uniform rolling bullets in the basement."
"Years later, I was looking at haunted Philadelphia tours to go on with a friend and the Betsy Ross House was on it. I was like "woah! I was there!" and looked into it some more. Turns out there is a woman at the end of the bed crying and a uniformed man in the basement that people have reported seeing. There is no way that 8 year old me would have known about either of these things."
hello kitty...hello kitty lol GIF by Animation Domination High-DefGiphy
"I had this hello kitty Balloon In my bed room, it had a string and weight on it. So it was late, I had the lights on just Sitting on my bed. The Balloon turns, faces my door, slowly floats into my hallway and turns and floats into my sister's room. To this day I am scared of balloons."
They are among us and they like Hello Kitty. I'm probably rattling the paranormal cages and they'll come for me next, but I'm ready. I feel like this thread has prepared me.
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The past year brought about much anxiety and it's been a challenge to find the light in what has felt like perpetual darkness.
"What gives you genuine happiness?"
Food brings people together, and that combination brings much happiness for these Redditors.
"Plenty of my favorite food eaten together with fam."
"Harvesting fruits/veggies from plants which I grew myself and then gifting the harvest to others. I love to grow blueberries and hope I will have lots next year."
Compliments To The Chef
"Seeing people enjoy food that I cooked, especially seeing my fiancee smile while she eats my from-scratch chocolate chip cookies."
The Little Things
"It's difficult to tell the difference between genuine happiness and enough distraction. Food, like video games or playing the piano, makes me joyful while I'm eating it. I believe that the things that make me truly happy are the ones that happen infrequently, if at all, and are beyond of my control, such as being complimented or receiving physical contact."
Being alone with our thoughts can be comforting.
Wee Small Hours Of The Morning
"Being outside with no people around. Live in a city and I get up super early and just walk around before everyone else is out. Best part of my day."
In Between Consciousness
"I think it may be the only time I am ever genuinely happy when I am in that state of going to sleep where I think, but at the same time I am neither asleep nor awake. It feels like I am entirely detached from the physical world; free of fear, and pain."
"Don't try heroin."
"I've noticed that some things can make you so happy that they make you happy before (anticipation) and after (reminiscing) you've done them."
Being with loved ones, both humans and pets, can be the very definition of happiness.
"Weekend mornings sitting on the couch curled up with my husband and cat, both of us reading a book. It feels like quality time even though we aren't talking. Just a lot of peace."
"Your comment made me imagine a cat sitting on a couch, reading a book, wearing reading glasses and that made me really happy."
Hide And Seek
"Watching my cat get stuck somewhere stupid, then yelling for help. The best place so far was in a cabinet over the stove."
Our Inner Comedian
"When I manage to make my friends day by making them laugh. I honestly get so happy when they are happy."
What Brings Joy To Others
"I really love to hear about other people's hobbies/passions/interests. It never fails to make me smile."
"Equally, my hobbies/passions/interests make me happy."
I'm a kid at heart.
So it's not surprising that going to a Disney park as an adult brings out the inner kid in me.
Having grown up in Southern California, I get nostalgic about all my trips to Disneyland with my family and friends.
Eventually, I got a job there in entertainment, where I've made lifelong friends and grew as a performer.
My glee quadruples when I bring friends who've never been to a Disney park before and I see the excitement on their faces.
And what brings me pure joy is hearing from these first-time visitors that, after a long day of running around for 12+ hours, they tell me they had the "best day ever."
Walt, you did a good thing.
A lot of talk going on about women's bodies, isn't there?
Not necessarily with women front and center as part of the conversation, unfortunately.
One of the main talking points against these bans and laws being placed on women's bodies is the idea that it would never happen to a man. "If men could get pregnant, there'd be free abortions tomorrow," is a slogan thrown around quite a bit online. Is that true?
Let's ask them.
Men of Reddit, would you take a male contraceptive pill if it was readily available? Why/Why not?
Genuinely, you might find yourself surprised at how many men are willing and ready to do their part in controlling what goes on during contraception.
Click, Click...No Boom.
"Yes. Makes more sense to unload the gun than shoot at a bulletproof vest."
"Without a doubt. I hate the idea of a vasectomy...nervous about the procedure. But I'd 100% take a male contraceptive pill"
Both Parties Are Making A Choice
"Yes. I world prefer both genders have birth control and that both are actively using it to give the best possible chance of no accidental pregnancies."
What Have Women Been Going Through?
"Honestly I would because I hate the fact how it f-cks with my girlfriend's body. And I rather deal with it than her"
"Absolutely ruins my day when I think about what a hormonal disaster the implant has been for her. It doesn't even bother her that much, but why should she have to deal with any of it at all? Saving up for a vasectomy so it can all just be done with."
Some men are not for a male contraceptive.
Hear them out.
"Think I'd probably still rely on rubbers. Shooting a load without one and relying on it being blanks... I'd be too paranoid about it"
"Rubbers will still help against things OTHER than pregnancy too - so, wearing them is still a good idea"
Wait, What Day Of The Week Is It?
"Oh yes 100%. The only reason I'd be hesitant is i'm very likely to forget"
"Yeah my ex couldn't even remember to buy condoms so not sure I would trust him with a pill. I also wouldn't trust myself with it either, hence the condoms :D"
What's It Doing To Me?
"If it had the same side-effect as the female one and affected my mood or my libido? F-ck no."
"Not all methods have that effect on women. There are literally hundreds of contraception, it's finding the best one for your body."
"I imagine that if men were taking contraception there would be triple the research into making sure you guys were A-OK"
It's All In The Conversation
"Personally, I wouldn't take it. The pill messes with your hormones and that's why I don't expect a woman to take it and also, that's why I don't want to take it."
"If she does, because she wants to - ok. If she doesn't, because she doesn't want to - ok, too."
"If I happen to hook up with someone, I'll wear a condom, because pregnancy isn't the only thing to prevent."
"If I am in a relationship and my gf tells me that she doesn't want to take the pill (anymore), I don't have any right to argue with her and that's why I'll wear a condom."
"I don't care if it "doesn't feel so good" - for me, the best thing about sex is the shared intimacy."
However, really, it's the man in all of us that wouldn't mind shouldering some responsibility in the child-baring years of our lives. Cheers to that.
So Long As It's A Unity Effort
"Yes, I have this theory that every man's phone alarm would go off at the same time at the bar, and we would raise our bc pill in the air to cheers all taking it at the same time"
Why Make Them Do Something You're Not Willing To Do?
"Abso-f-cking-lutely YES a million times yes!!!"
"Straight away, it would be a d*ck move if I expected my girlfriend to take stuff if I'm not willing to"
...Is That Pun Or...?
"Yes! My wife has been carrying the burden of birth control for 11 years now. Lots of pain, discomfort and other effects over the years, its time men can share the load."
We won't know what the future brings. Science at this point makes it feel like anything is possible, so in the next century? Who can say?
Be ready, men. It's our turn, next.
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