Fed Up People Who Decided To Stop Using Straws Share The Stories Of Their Last Straw (Yes, This Entire Article Is About Straws).
Just another straw article....
1. Blame it on the r-r-r-r-r-root beer
I was 18 years old. I was at a company dinner for a computer store that I worked at at the time. We were going out of business, so they threw us one last hoorah at a steakhouse. Ribs, steaks, oh god it was so good.
I've been a teetotaller my entire life, so I was enjoying a root beer as usual. A really beautiful waitress came to my table to talk to us. I'd had 3-4 root beers at this point, so I was feeling really confident, and I said something like "So, uh, you...you like...waitressing?" or something equally clever.
Many mistakes were made that night, but the biggest one happened right here. After I asked her the question, I kept my eyes locked with hers to demonstrate my confidence, held my drink to my mouth, and tried to locate the straw with my lips instead of looking at it. My lips fished around the glass for the longest eight seconds of my life, and in that moment, time completely slowed down and this look of absolute horror grew across the waitress's face. With each passing second she realized what a complete loser I am. I must have looked like a horse whispering something in French. By the time I actually found the straw, she got the hell out of there, and I was left alone slurping down my last root beer, among all my coworkers. There wouldn't be a single refill from that point on; I didn't need to ask to know it.
My friends made fun of me for years. I'm 29 now, and they still bring it up when we get together for dinner sometimes. I never used a straw again after that night.
2. Moth-er of pearl!
My husband found a pantry moth that had died stuck to the inside of his straw. After he'd already been drinking from it for a while.
3. Dammit, Brad! I told you to stop putting straws in my camel's backpack.
When it broke the camels back. That was my only camel.
4. On a more serious note: animals need us to quit it with straws
Serious answer: That video of that turtle with a straw stuck in his bleeding nose. It was so sad.
5. On another serious note: it's hard to be sexy with a straw
I was trying to be sexy at the bar and as I went for the straw I poked my eye. Not very sexy.
6. Thank goodness for laziness
I had jaw surgery so I was (am still) numb from my bottom lip to my chin. This made it somewhat difficult to drink from a glass so I (Continued)
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used straws for a while. Then I ran out of my box of straws so I decided that was the last straw and learned to drink like my regular self again.
7. Again with the sea turtle (it's really impacted a lot of people, apparently)
I saw this video of somebody who found with a sea turtle with a straw stuck in its nose and removed it. It's horrific and pretty awful to watch. I don't need top use straws and I don't want to make more plastic ocean junk.
8. Okay gender norms, whatever...
One of the Senior VP's of my company told me: "A gentleman never drinks through a straw," so I haven't used one since.
9. That's one way to do it, I suppose
The first time I ever went to bar I was drinking from a straw. This drunk guy walked up to me, took my straw out, threw it on the ground and said: "straws are for idiots!"
Haven't used a straw since.
10. Is this actually a thing? Someone please tell me, I'm serious
Fear of repeated straw usage giving me a bad case of "old lady mouth."
11. So... that's how they make cherry sprite?
I had one go up my nose on a date once. Sprite turned into cherry sprite and the date ended in shame and blood.
12. "I'm a surface level person".
I like drinking the surface of my drink not the bottom of it.
13. I'm pretty sure there's a support group for people like this
True story, I got a brain freeze from a mountain dew Baja blast freeze... I went back in for the death slurp where your (Continued)
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head just barely stops hurting and your a glutton for punishment. Due to messed up vision and sensory deprivation I ended up jamming the straw into the corner of my eye..
So there I am, brain freeze full swing, straw sticking into the corner of my eye and laughing uncontrollably at myself while everyone is looking on.
I decided then and there to cut the excess straw off anything that requires a straw. If I can swing it I go bareback and just drink it straight up.
14. Everything always comes down to Tom Hanks
When I was 15 or so, Tom Hanks in "That Thing You Do" was at a bar and said "I'll have one of these with no straw." I thought it was so baller, I haven't had a straw since.
15. Confidence. That'll do the trick.
Because I suck at nothing.
16. Illegal soft drink paraphernalia: an award-winning memoir
I grew up poor. My parents were only able to put food on the table by peddling illegal soft drink paraphernalia across the border from Nevada to Utah. The only way they could do this without getting caught was by the use of our pack animal: a camel named Uncle Bob. The customs agents were so shocked at the sight of a camel, they usually wouldn't search us, and even if they did, they never would have suspected that Uncle Bob's second hump was just a furry stowage compartment.
One day, pop found out that there was a supplier who needed more proboscis' than we typically were able to hide on Uncle Bob. We tried and tried to rent a second camel to no avail. This left us with only the option of loading down Uncle Bob.
I'll never forget that day. We stuffed straws into the poor beast of burdens hidden compartment as he groaned under the weight. I pleaded with my father on behalf of the great beast. "He can't take anymore, father! PLEASE STOP!!" I no more got the words out of my mouth when suddenly, as father attempted to pack just one more item of contraband, Uncle Bob let out a tortured groan in sync with a loud snapping sound as his back suddenly sagged. I scorned my father for being so greedy and we never spoke again.
And THAT was the straw that broke the camels back.
17. They're horrible for the environment
One of my environmentally conscious friends introduced me to the idea that straws are harmful to the environment. And honestly I never really use them anyway, so I stopped using them!
18. Straws can be detrimental to your drinking experience
Flavor is not so simple as the chemicals of the drink entering your mouth. There are other sensations. For example, the (Continued)
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temperature, the feeling on your lips, the smell when glass gets close, the shape of the cup, the material (glass, metal, plastic, paper)... all of these things matter.
A straw changes the whole experience. You skip the lips and go straight for the middle of the tongue. The rest of your mouth just gets left out. You don't get the smell. You have to work harder. Overall, you just don't get as much sensation from your drink.
Simple answer: it tastes better.
19. I also don't drink beer during work hours, but that doesn't mean I'll give up on my desk drawer vodka stash... don't be silly!
I don't drink beer with a straw. So why drink anything else with a straw?
20. We've all been there.
Accidentally deep throated one. I was sucking it, and either sucked it so hard or it was so slippery, that it went halfway down my throat.
21. Then there's the problem of cracked straws
You know how infuriating it is if you grab the straw just the wrong way and it bends? It puts that little tiny slit in the straw which makes you completely lose suction and rendering the damn thing worthless. I'll just tip the cup like a civilized piece of human garbage.
22. Nothing like a sassy server to help you kick the habit
I was 17 at the Waffle House in Chesapeake Virginia. We would go eat some delicious hash browns after some hard rounds of laser tag at Ultrazone. We would also order water with a bunch of lemons and make our own lemonade.
Then one day the waitress (Continued)
Then one day the waitress asked if wanted sissy sticks with our fake lemonade.
I haven't drank fake lemonade or used a straw (sissy stick) since. I'm 36.
23. Something ain't sprite about this story
I was pulling out of a drive-thru, hit a bump, and the straw went up my nose right as I inhaled. Got sprite in my lungs :(
24. Moments of profound realization :')
One day our whole family bought a bunch of fast food including fountain drinks for all five of us. When we got home and took everything out of the bag we found that they had neglected to supply any straws... and for a few embarrassing moments I was left wondering how we would be able to consume our drinks now.
Then of course it hit me that there was in fact another way to drink from a cup. Once I came to that realization I also came to the conclusion there was no reason to use a straw in the first place.
25. Pretty sure this story is one of Oprah's bookclub picks
Every time somebody wanted to flip a coin, I was there. "No, don't worry guys, we can all draw straws, I brought mine!" I would say, and everybody would ignore me. For years, I persisted on only choosing things by drawing straws: Monopoly? Screw rolling the highest number, we draw straws. Bathroom schedules? We draw straws to determine the order we choose our times. But one rainy day, about 3 and a half years ago, I wanted to work out whether my brother or I would get the TV remote, when a look of horror shot through my face: I only had one straw. That was the last straw. Ever since then, I haven't drawn straws once.
26. Great story... but what the heck is an Ice Chocolate?
This literally happened maybe 2 weeks ago. Home for the holidays and my old man has been finishing work around 9pm. I decided to be a top notch son and make an Ice Chocolate for him when he walks in the door. I went the full way with whipped cream, marshmallows, flakes, ice and ice cream and presented it in a hipster-esque jar like the cafes do these days. He comes home and is pretty chuffed about it. He decides he wants a straw we didn't have any in the draw but he remembered his work bag had some in it. One of those big thick straws. Annnyway. He starts drinking and goes "what's that" and proceeds to pull a slug out of his mouth and starts gagging. He works on a horse stud so his bag had been outside that day and a slug had got into his bag and into the straw (we know this as he had another straw in the bag and they were in that straw also. Needless to say I now ask if he wants a straw when he's drinking something.
27. Reminds me of little kids on the playground with drinking box straws
Maybe not quite on topic, but back in the early 80s my beloved grandmother decided to quit smoking because, as she said, "if cigarettes ever get to over $2 a pack (yes I know right), I'll quit."
Cue the day in maybe 1985 when smokes broke the two dollar a pack level, and she (Continued)
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and she quit cold turkey. Seriously, after several decades of smoking she just quit. And there was no nicorette gum at the time.
The only thing she did was smoke straws. Like she would hold a straw in the same place she would have held a cigarette and just pretended to puff on it. As a kid I was so proud of her and impressed with this. She did quit for good, with only holding a straw in her hand.
So maybe her last straw was the last one she held before she realized she no longer needed that crutch.
28. This is... surprisingly a good reason to be afraid of straws
I have a very legitimate reason to be fed up with straws. This was my last straw. And it went into my chest. So when I was little I was at a friend's birthday party and his mom gave us cups to drink out of with the straw built into the cup. And they were thick plastic. Long story short we were playing games in my friend's backyard and I tripped on the grass and I fell on my cup, the straw part taking a nice chunk of skin off my stomach. Haven't used a straw for ten years.
29. That's a horrible prank
I was drinking a soda after work and my buddy who was bartending slipped a cocktail straw into my straw; so when I sipped, the cocktail straw flew down my throat and got stuck.
30. A message to you, from the creator of this last straws article.
If you just got to the end of reading this 6 page article about drinking straws, I want to take the time now to personally thank you. You, kind reader, are a special being. For, when we read an entire article about drinking straws, it is not just an article about drinking straws. The internet is an ocean of content. You could be reading about the collapse of our environment, Donald Trump's new bathroom bills affecting trans school kids in the US, or any of Emily Dickenson's 1789 poems. But you didn't. You clicked on an article about straws and you committed, globdammit!
Because, my dear friend (are we on that level yet? Can I call you friend?) the distance to the edge of the observable universe is about 46 billion light years across. Within that universe, there are approximately 50 sextillion habitable planets and many more unhabitable ones. Our planet, Earth is home to 8.7 million different species, ranging from Paedophryne amauensis (a frog the size of your pencil eraser) to the blue whale (a whale the length of 3880 pencil erasers). Of all the stories belonging to all the universe and each of the 8.7 million species and every one of the 7 billion people in it, you chose to dedicate your time to reading about fairly mundane moments in the lives of just 29 of those human beings. Because you know that, even though there are cooler stories or more exciting stories or sadder or happier ones, everyone's story matters, even these kinda crappy ones.
- Your forever indebted content "writer", Sara
There's something seeing a person litter that drives me up the wall. I remember being a kid and being explicitly told to hold on to my trash and not just throw it in the street. As a kid, I distinctly remember being made fun of for not just throwing the bag of chips I'd just eaten or an empty soda bottle into the gutter.
I can't imagine doing that. Why?! We truly treat this planet as if we have somewhere else to go.
After Redditor pnrddt asked the online community, "What small action immediately makes you dislike a stranger?" people shared their observations.
"Playing music..."<p>Playing music or having a 'private' conversation via speaker phone in a public place.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/ginci58?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">LLCoolBrap</a></p>
"When they exhibit..."<p><strong></strong>When they exhibit a personality trait that I also have, and don't like about myself. Every time I find myself being dismissive or judgemental of somebody, it's just my own insecurity.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/ginn0g5?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3"></a><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/ginn0g5?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">iotangle42</a></p>
"When I'm talking..."<p>When I'm talking and they are not listening. Like they are not even trying to pretend that they are listening.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/gincjto?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">eat-the-rich-07</a></p>
"Because one of these days..."<p>A person can treat me like a princess but as soon as I see them mistreating either animals or people, I am out of there. Because one of these days, you'll be on that receiving end.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/ginpr97?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">starlightradio</a></p>
"It just screams..."<p>Telling people to smile. It just screams condescending and a lack of emotional intelligence.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/ginovsj?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3"></a><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/ginovsj?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">3FoolsinaTrenchcoat</a></p>
"When I hear that..."<p>Grown ups using "baby talk" to try to get what they want. I'm not talking about when people goo-goo at babies, but when they use a silly whiney voice to try to persuade people or make people do them a favour.</p><p>"Aww, pwease hewp me wiv dis wittle pwoject."</p><p>When I hear that I instantly lose respect for that person, be it a stranger or someone I know.</p><p>Pet peeve.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/ginbwb4?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">handsahwill</a></p>
"Okay, we get it..."<p>One-upping people. "Yeah, that's pretty good, but one time I..." Okay, we get it, your life is more amazing than everyone else's.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/ginhrkd?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">well-uh-yeah</a></p>
"When out driving..."<p><strong></strong><strong></strong>When out driving, someone who pulls out in front of you, then proceeds to go 5-10+ mph under the speed limit.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/gingjuj?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3"></a><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/gingjuj?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">FuzzMcBeefy84</a></p>
"If you don't..."<p>Talking negatively about anyone who's just trying to have a good time in a fun setting. If you don't have nice to say shut the hell up.</p><p><span></span><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/gio4vf5?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">intergLACTIC</a></p>
"When people..."<p>When people put other people down to try and make themselves look better. "Oh I'm just playing around with them we're friends." I don't care quit being an @ss you know what you're doing and you should be able to tell you're making them feel bad.</p><p><span></span><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/gio9p3c?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">inf303</a></p>
"If it's into a drain..."<p>Spitting on the pavement.</p><p>If it's into a drain, that's fair enough, sometimes you get phlegm and you need to get rid of it. Going for a drain shows you're at least considerate of other, imo. But on the floor where anyone can step in it (or if you're in a wheelchair, get it all over your hands from pushing the wheels) is just gross.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ktpb6p/what_small_action_immediately_makes_you_dislike_a/ginojq3?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">ghostmadlittlemiss</a></p>
When you're in the market for a slew of very specific facts that all fall under the same general theme, the internet really delivers.
Forget streamlined public health capabilities and revolutionized human communication, the true beauty of the internet is all the random, barely useful information you can find when a bunch odd people decide to assemble and swap info.
Homemade Tarantula<p>"Dental student here. Black hairy tongue is a common condition and it's exactly what it sounds like." </p><p>"It's just caused by buildup of dead skin that becomes hair like because of tobacco use or antibiotic use. Usually combined with lack of frictional forces from brushing"</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/giu9tdq?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Alarm-Potential</a></p>
Load Em Up<p>"When a patient gets a kidney transplant, they usually leave the old 2 behind unless there's a significant problem with them."</p><p>"The extra kidney is just tucked in the peritoneum leaving the patient with 3 kidneys."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/giu6qjd?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">MedicalJargon-itis</a></p>
Come On Mutations!<p>"Every single melanocyte on your skin (you know, the ones that give your hairs color, and your skin its skin color) is connected to your sympathetic nervous system via modified synapses."</p><p>"No-one knows why they're connected that way - but we do know that under stress, those nerves nuke the pool of stem cells that create hair pigment, which is why it makes you go grey."</p><p>"A few mutations and you could theoretically be able to control them and change color like a chameleon."</p><p>"So in many ways, we're basically walking cuttlefish."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/giuyo29?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">PavlovaPalava</a></p>
Play the Long Game, People<p>"Humans can outpace any animal on the planet."</p><p>"No, we're not the fastest, but if we were chasing the fastest animal (cheetah) we would catch it and be able to keep going."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/gisujdr?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Bout3Fidy</a></p>
Little Helpful Critters<p>"There are little microscopic organisms living in your eyebrows, eating away at the dead skin."</p><p>"Don't freak out, they are very helpful and completely harmless, just a little gross"</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/giud33u?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Vid-Me-BossCheesburg</a></p>
Thankfully That Filter is a Pretty Good One<p>"Saliva is filtered blood. Your tears are too. And if you're too stressed out you can cry blood."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/gitshe5?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">mylifeisathrowaway10</a></p>
Imagine It All in a Bottle<p>"I know that the average human churns out between 1 and 2 liters of saliva every day.... oh and we have parasites who are embedded in our hair follicles, and they eat away at our skin, thus causing Dandruff :,)"</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/gisrxcc?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Throwawayyy123451</a></p>
So Hot<p>"Humans give off so much body heat that in 30 min we can boil a gallon of water" -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/giu1ngt?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Financial-Ad-6050</a><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/giu1ngt?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3"></a></p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"Rookie numbers" -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/giuvqqt?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">nopenothappening</a></p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"Pshh I can get a gallon of water boiling in like 10 minutes tops" -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/giuhji3?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">ridiculouslygay</a></p>
Oh Dear<p>"Old ladies often have prolapse of their pelvic organs. This means their vaginal walls got so weak that it can no longer support their bladder or uterus."</p><p> -Nurse practitioner"</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kum69x/doctors_of_reddit_whats_the_weirdestgrossest_fact/gitopxb?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">vespertinas</a></p>
Working in a doctor's office means helping people when they're at their lowest. Sometimes, that leads to wonderful moments when the patient is thankful for all the advice and care you provided. Other times, it means taking something out of someone's bum.
Turns out, that second one happens a lot more than you might think.
For Fashion And Protection<img lazy-loadable="true" src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yNTQ1MDMwOC9vcmlnaW4uZ2lmIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTY1MjkwNTU2OX0.6D-LIQ26JXH0-7OtPpG93HOtt41wAv62bGHMVvuAYpk/img.gif?width=980" id="7ff06" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="6109fb5baf04f17deade8b58695881d1" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" />wound up season 3 GIFGiphy<p>I had a patient come in with lacerations to her fingers. Her blender got clogged and she stuck her hand inside to clear it. She cleared it and the blender resumed....um blending. Luckily, she had long acrylic nails. This helped lessen the impact.</p><p><a target="_blank" href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuld31/er_doctors_and_nurses_of_reddit_what_is_the/gitz5l4?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3">Bornagainchola</a></p>
I'd Rather Go To Sleep<p>Guy came in after being concerned the bed sheet had stuck to his lower leg. Turns out hed been using a petrol mower the evening before and it had exploded. Full thickness burn to his calf. No pain. He wanted to go home to feed his cows instead of being transferred to burns and plastics. Man it looked like white leather.</p><p><a target="_blank" href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuld31/er_doctors_and_nurses_of_reddit_what_is_the/gitkqf9?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3">DamaskRoses</a></p>
Why Play Typical Catch?<p>Guy was camping with his frat buddies and they were firing air rifles at each other with a baseball glove on.</p><p>The pellet was lodged well into his hand. Like, how did you think this was going to end?</p><p><a target="_blank" href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuld31/er_doctors_and_nurses_of_reddit_what_is_the/gitq7lt?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3">Milesofstyle</a></p>
Close Eyes Off From The World<p>I was in the ER as a patient next to a guy who was brought in via ambulance because he super glued his eye lids shut.</p><p>He was high as a kite, but so was I from the pain meds I'd been given for my own injury. Whatever meds I was given made me think everything was hilarious. I got yelled at by the nurses for laughing hysterically in the next room. He was being a pain in the a--, ER was on diversion already, and they were not amused.</p><p><a target="_blank" href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuld31/er_doctors_and_nurses_of_reddit_what_is_the/githxnc?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3">brubarbal</a></p>
That's Why It's Called A "Dog" Toy<p>A few stand out. Person somehow swallowed a spiked dog toy.</p><p>Someone tried to reverse his circumcision by cutting more of his d-ck off with a pair of scissors.</p><p>About every object known to man up the bum. 🎵 if you like it then you shoulda put a string on it." 🎵</p><p><a target="_blank" href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuld31/er_doctors_and_nurses_of_reddit_what_is_the/gitnt24?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3">bsn2fnp1</a></p>
Yeah, But, How?<img lazy-loadable="true" src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yNTQ1MDMxMi9vcmlnaW4uZ2lmIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTY0MjAyNTM0OX0.Esaobyl7Yq7QltSxli0ZwjggE7j8A4gu0uNRnn1ZwUc/img.gif?width=980" id="95a28" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="f4eb7f0131c0d79db2de93fd2bbdc0af" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" />homer simpson GIFGiphy<p>I've seen an internal vaginal laceration from someone climbing a fence while trying to see something happening down the street.</p><p><a target="_blank" href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuld31/er_doctors_and_nurses_of_reddit_what_is_the/giss2id?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3">midturbinate</a></p>
Again With The Butt...<p>ER Nurse here</p><p>-We had a girl come in and who knows what she was doing but she had one of the thin glow sticks in her bladder, maybe some fun finger/glow play during a concert? I don't know but pretty wild.</p><ul><li>Also I had a Spanish speaking only gentleman explain why a shoe polish bottle was in his bum, we had to use a video interpreter due to the language barrier but it's was pretty wild to hear the interpreter say "I have a bottle of polish in my anus" after expecting him to just explain why he had belly pain. We also proceeded to print out multiple pictures of common types of shoe polish he used to ask him if it was "this one or that one". It was hilarious when he identified what one it was based on the picture, he had to go to the OR</li></ul><div><a target="_blank" href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuld31/er_doctors_and_nurses_of_reddit_what_is_the/gitqmlm?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3">AirFryersRule</a><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuld31/er_doctors_and_nurses_of_reddit_what_is_the/gitqmlm?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank"></a></div>
Sounds Like A College Guy Thing To Do<p>Had a university student who ignited a firework in his anus while drunk for the amusement of his buddies. It exploded, causing full thickness burns of his rectum, resulting in him needing a colostomy</p><p><a target="_blank" href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kuld31/er_doctors_and_nurses_of_reddit_what_is_the/giss6l1?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3">ArcofRiolan</a></p>
Wow...<img lazy-loadable="true" src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yNTQ1MDI4OC9vcmlnaW4uZ2lmIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTYzMDMyMzMyMn0.b42VhIpJrAsaFR19Cf55ZVkWnby5yTIrMhI73HVAImk/img.gif?width=980" id="3ccdf" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="50847094a4e17c16febbb35d2146f14f" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" />scared homer simpson GIFGiphy<p>Operating theatre - this woman came in with a frozen chicken stuck inside her lady parts. Apparently she had a habit of buying them, inserting them and then pulling them out, as she really had a thing for going through childbirth, but on this occasion, she hadn't allowed time for it to defrost properly /adequately.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/Mike_OxonFaier/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Mike_OxonFaier</a></p><p><em>Want to "know" more? Never miss another big, odd, funny, or heartbreaking moment again. Sign up for the Knowable newsletter <a href="https://mailchi.mp/knowable/knowable-newsletter-in-content" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">here</a>. </em></p>
I love movies. The cinema has long been a savior of mine and has given me some of my greatest inspirations. But being an avid film watcher has also made me quite the critic. I can always tell when a movie is worth the money to see in theaters or wait until it's on basic cable with commercials. The signs of mediocrity abound, and sometimes they aren't that difficult to spot.Redditor u/fjv08kl wanted to know what is obvious about mediocre cinema by asking.... What are some subtle 'red flags' that tell you a movie is not worth watching?