Fed Up People Who Decided To Stop Using Straws Share The Stories Of Their Last Straw (Yes, This Entire Article Is About Straws).

Just another straw article....
1. Blame it on the r-r-r-r-r-root beer
I was 18 years old. I was at a company dinner for a computer store that I worked at at the time. We were going out of business, so they threw us one last hoorah at a steakhouse. Ribs, steaks, oh god it was so good.
I've been a teetotaller my entire life, so I was enjoying a root beer as usual. A really beautiful waitress came to my table to talk to us. I'd had 3-4 root beers at this point, so I was feeling really confident, and I said something like "So, uh, you...you like...waitressing?" or something equally clever.
Many mistakes were made that night, but the biggest one happened right here. After I asked her the question, I kept my eyes locked with hers to demonstrate my confidence, held my drink to my mouth, and tried to locate the straw with my lips instead of looking at it. My lips fished around the glass for the longest eight seconds of my life, and in that moment, time completely slowed down and this look of absolute horror grew across the waitress's face. With each passing second she realized what a complete loser I am. I must have looked like a horse whispering something in French. By the time I actually found the straw, she got the hell out of there, and I was left alone slurping down my last root beer, among all my coworkers. There wouldn't be a single refill from that point on; I didn't need to ask to know it.
My friends made fun of me for years. I'm 29 now, and they still bring it up when we get together for dinner sometimes. I never used a straw again after that night.
2. Moth-er of pearl!
My husband found a pantry moth that had died stuck to the inside of his straw. After he'd already been drinking from it for a while.
3. Dammit, Brad! I told you to stop putting straws in my camel's backpack.
When it broke the camels back. That was my only camel.
4. On a more serious note: animals need us to quit it with straws
Serious answer: That video of that turtle with a straw stuck in his bleeding nose. It was so sad.
5. On another serious note: it's hard to be sexy with a straw
I was trying to be sexy at the bar and as I went for the straw I poked my eye. Not very sexy.
6. Thank goodness for laziness
I had jaw surgery so I was (am still) numb from my bottom lip to my chin. This made it somewhat difficult to drink from a glass so I (Continued)
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used straws for a while. Then I ran out of my box of straws so I decided that was the last straw and learned to drink like my regular self again.
7. Again with the sea turtle (it's really impacted a lot of people, apparently)
I saw this video of somebody who found with a sea turtle with a straw stuck in its nose and removed it. It's horrific and pretty awful to watch. I don't need top use straws and I don't want to make more plastic ocean junk.
8. Okay gender norms, whatever...
One of the Senior VP's of my company told me: "A gentleman never drinks through a straw," so I haven't used one since.
9. That's one way to do it, I suppose
The first time I ever went to bar I was drinking from a straw. This drunk guy walked up to me, took my straw out, threw it on the ground and said: "straws are for idiots!"
Haven't used a straw since.
10. Is this actually a thing? Someone please tell me, I'm serious
Fear of repeated straw usage giving me a bad case of "old lady mouth."
11. So... that's how they make cherry sprite?
I had one go up my nose on a date once. Sprite turned into cherry sprite and the date ended in shame and blood.
12. "I'm a surface level person".
I like drinking the surface of my drink not the bottom of it.
13. I'm pretty sure there's a support group for people like this
True story, I got a brain freeze from a mountain dew Baja blast freeze... I went back in for the death slurp where your (Continued)
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head just barely stops hurting and your a glutton for punishment. Due to messed up vision and sensory deprivation I ended up jamming the straw into the corner of my eye..
So there I am, brain freeze full swing, straw sticking into the corner of my eye and laughing uncontrollably at myself while everyone is looking on.
I decided then and there to cut the excess straw off anything that requires a straw. If I can swing it I go bareback and just drink it straight up.
14. Everything always comes down to Tom Hanks
When I was 15 or so, Tom Hanks in "That Thing You Do" was at a bar and said "I'll have one of these with no straw." I thought it was so baller, I haven't had a straw since.
15. Confidence. That'll do the trick.
Because I suck at nothing.
16. Illegal soft drink paraphernalia: an award-winning memoir
I grew up poor. My parents were only able to put food on the table by peddling illegal soft drink paraphernalia across the border from Nevada to Utah. The only way they could do this without getting caught was by the use of our pack animal: a camel named Uncle Bob. The customs agents were so shocked at the sight of a camel, they usually wouldn't search us, and even if they did, they never would have suspected that Uncle Bob's second hump was just a furry stowage compartment.
One day, pop found out that there was a supplier who needed more proboscis' than we typically were able to hide on Uncle Bob. We tried and tried to rent a second camel to no avail. This left us with only the option of loading down Uncle Bob.
I'll never forget that day. We stuffed straws into the poor beast of burdens hidden compartment as he groaned under the weight. I pleaded with my father on behalf of the great beast. "He can't take anymore, father! PLEASE STOP!!" I no more got the words out of my mouth when suddenly, as father attempted to pack just one more item of contraband, Uncle Bob let out a tortured groan in sync with a loud snapping sound as his back suddenly sagged. I scorned my father for being so greedy and we never spoke again.
And THAT was the straw that broke the camels back.
17. They're horrible for the environment
One of my environmentally conscious friends introduced me to the idea that straws are harmful to the environment. And honestly I never really use them anyway, so I stopped using them!
18. Straws can be detrimental to your drinking experience
Flavor is not so simple as the chemicals of the drink entering your mouth. There are other sensations. For example, the (Continued)
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temperature, the feeling on your lips, the smell when glass gets close, the shape of the cup, the material (glass, metal, plastic, paper)... all of these things matter.
A straw changes the whole experience. You skip the lips and go straight for the middle of the tongue. The rest of your mouth just gets left out. You don't get the smell. You have to work harder. Overall, you just don't get as much sensation from your drink.
Simple answer: it tastes better.
19. I also don't drink beer during work hours, but that doesn't mean I'll give up on my desk drawer vodka stash... don't be silly!
I don't drink beer with a straw. So why drink anything else with a straw?
20. We've all been there.
Accidentally deep throated one. I was sucking it, and either sucked it so hard or it was so slippery, that it went halfway down my throat.
21. Then there's the problem of cracked straws
You know how infuriating it is if you grab the straw just the wrong way and it bends? It puts that little tiny slit in the straw which makes you completely lose suction and rendering the damn thing worthless. I'll just tip the cup like a civilized piece of human garbage.
22. Nothing like a sassy server to help you kick the habit
I was 17 at the Waffle House in Chesapeake Virginia. We would go eat some delicious hash browns after some hard rounds of laser tag at Ultrazone. We would also order water with a bunch of lemons and make our own lemonade.
Then one day the waitress (Continued)
Then one day the waitress asked if wanted sissy sticks with our fake lemonade.
I haven't drank fake lemonade or used a straw (sissy stick) since. I'm 36.
23. Something ain't sprite about this story
I was pulling out of a drive-thru, hit a bump, and the straw went up my nose right as I inhaled. Got sprite in my lungs :(
24. Moments of profound realization :')
One day our whole family bought a bunch of fast food including fountain drinks for all five of us. When we got home and took everything out of the bag we found that they had neglected to supply any straws... and for a few embarrassing moments I was left wondering how we would be able to consume our drinks now.
Then of course it hit me that there was in fact another way to drink from a cup. Once I came to that realization I also came to the conclusion there was no reason to use a straw in the first place.
25. Pretty sure this story is one of Oprah's bookclub picks
Every time somebody wanted to flip a coin, I was there. "No, don't worry guys, we can all draw straws, I brought mine!" I would say, and everybody would ignore me. For years, I persisted on only choosing things by drawing straws: Monopoly? Screw rolling the highest number, we draw straws. Bathroom schedules? We draw straws to determine the order we choose our times. But one rainy day, about 3 and a half years ago, I wanted to work out whether my brother or I would get the TV remote, when a look of horror shot through my face: I only had one straw. That was the last straw. Ever since then, I haven't drawn straws once.
26. Great story... but what the heck is an Ice Chocolate?
This literally happened maybe 2 weeks ago. Home for the holidays and my old man has been finishing work around 9pm. I decided to be a top notch son and make an Ice Chocolate for him when he walks in the door. I went the full way with whipped cream, marshmallows, flakes, ice and ice cream and presented it in a hipster-esque jar like the cafes do these days. He comes home and is pretty chuffed about it. He decides he wants a straw we didn't have any in the draw but he remembered his work bag had some in it. One of those big thick straws. Annnyway. He starts drinking and goes "what's that" and proceeds to pull a slug out of his mouth and starts gagging. He works on a horse stud so his bag had been outside that day and a slug had got into his bag and into the straw (we know this as he had another straw in the bag and they were in that straw also. Needless to say I now ask if he wants a straw when he's drinking something.
27. Reminds me of little kids on the playground with drinking box straws
Maybe not quite on topic, but back in the early 80s my beloved grandmother decided to quit smoking because, as she said, "if cigarettes ever get to over $2 a pack (yes I know right), I'll quit."
Cue the day in maybe 1985 when smokes broke the two dollar a pack level, and she (Continued)
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and she quit cold turkey. Seriously, after several decades of smoking she just quit. And there was no nicorette gum at the time.
The only thing she did was smoke straws. Like she would hold a straw in the same place she would have held a cigarette and just pretended to puff on it. As a kid I was so proud of her and impressed with this. She did quit for good, with only holding a straw in her hand.
So maybe her last straw was the last one she held before she realized she no longer needed that crutch.
28. This is... surprisingly a good reason to be afraid of straws
I have a very legitimate reason to be fed up with straws. This was my last straw. And it went into my chest. So when I was little I was at a friend's birthday party and his mom gave us cups to drink out of with the straw built into the cup. And they were thick plastic. Long story short we were playing games in my friend's backyard and I tripped on the grass and I fell on my cup, the straw part taking a nice chunk of skin off my stomach. Haven't used a straw for ten years.
29. That's a horrible prank
I was drinking a soda after work and my buddy who was bartending slipped a cocktail straw into my straw; so when I sipped, the cocktail straw flew down my throat and got stuck.
30. A message to you, from the creator of this last straws article.
Hi there.
If you just got to the end of reading this 6 page article about drinking straws, I want to take the time now to personally thank you. You, kind reader, are a special being. For, when we read an entire article about drinking straws, it is not just an article about drinking straws. The internet is an ocean of content. You could be reading about the collapse of our environment, Donald Trump's new bathroom bills affecting trans school kids in the US, or any of Emily Dickenson's 1789 poems. But you didn't. You clicked on an article about straws and you committed, globdammit!
Because, my dear friend (are we on that level yet? Can I call you friend?) the distance to the edge of the observable universe is about 46 billion light years across. Within that universe, there are approximately 50 sextillion habitable planets and many more unhabitable ones. Our planet, Earth is home to 8.7 million different species, ranging from Paedophryne amauensis (a frog the size of your pencil eraser) to the blue whale (a whale the length of 3880 pencil erasers). Of all the stories belonging to all the universe and each of the 8.7 million species and every one of the 7 billion people in it, you chose to dedicate your time to reading about fairly mundane moments in the lives of just 29 of those human beings. Because you know that, even though there are cooler stories or more exciting stories or sadder or happier ones, everyone's story matters, even these kinda crappy ones.
- Your forever indebted content "writer", Sara
All of us have fears which some might call irrational.
Up to and including ghosts, witches, monsters.
But more often than not, reality can be far scarier than the supernatural.
And there are very few people indeed who don't have a memory of a moment when they were truly and genuinely scared.
And not by an otherworldly encounter, but by things that could quite literally happen to anyone.
Redditor GodhimselfUwU was curious to hear the scariest experiences people have lived through, leading them to ask:
"What’s the scariest non-supernatural thing that ever happened to you?"
Intruder
"I was 14, alone at my grandmas house around midnight."
"She was across the street at the bar she owned."
"I was playing games on her computer, about 15 feet from one of the windows facing the backyard."
"All of a sudden the glass from that window shatters, and I ran to one of the bedrooms."
"I can hear my name being called."
"Eventually I see my grandma's ex-boyfriend enter the living room where the computer is."
"He keeps saying my name."
"I’m scared sh*tless, but I walk out and confront him."
"He says my grandma stole his ID and that’s what he came for, as he’s taking money from my grandmas purse."
"He looks f*cked up on something."
"I forget how he leaves but when he does I call the bar and people come over looking for him."
"They didn’t find him."
"About a year later he did it again, and I was once again alone there."
"Except this time instead of breaking a window he decides to try to kick the side door in."
"I’m just there chilling when out of nowhere I hear the loudest bangs coming from the side of the house and I instantly knew what was happening."
"I immediately called the bar and they sent a bunch of people over before he could make it in."
"He apparently tried to jump from one of her sheds into the alley next to her house and broke his leg."
"He went to prison."- nfreshn
They're coming right for us!
"Two bison charging right toward me down a narrow wooded path in Yellowstone when I was 12."- pcc2
Uncomfortable in new surroundings.
"My sister has mental health issues."
"We were in a foreign country, driving across mountains on a one lane dirt road with no guardrails."
"She had a complete mental breakdown and threatened many times to drive off the edge."
"To this day, my mom swears my sister wouldn't have done it."
"All I say is, 'you weren't in the car'."
"'You have no idea'."- BlorengeJulius
Lost in the woods.
"Getting lost on 350 acres of woods in southeast Georgia."
"Was found about 6 hours later."
The dog found me hours before the people did.- No_Regrats_42
A near death experience.
"Was working as a linemen tasked to replace a 16m wooden power pole which requires climbing up to untie the lines from the isolators."
"I checked if the pole had any rot beforehand, climbed up, untied the lines, climbed down, as I was packing my tools up , the pole fell from its own."- LimaRadek
He wasn't who he claimed to be.
"A man claiming to be a meter reader was in our yard and tried the back door AFTER trying the front."
"It was unlocked because there was a field behind us and our gate had a lock, that he somehow got by."
"The meter reader man was nearly eaten by our Great Dane who was dumb and peaceful, except for when she laid eyes on him."
"Our other dog also wanted to kill him and he was up on our trampoline begging us to call the dogs off, which we, my then 11 year old sister and I, refused to do and went to get our dad, who worked from home."
"The guy escaped while we got our dad and my dad let the police know what happened."
"The real meter reader man came the next week."- Applesintheorchard
Had no idea what they were witnessing.
"I guess watching a loved one have a seizure when I didn’t understand what it was."
"Legit thought I witnessed a death."
"Scary stuff."- Peppapigisgodly
Always look both ways.
"I got hit by a car while in a crosswalk a few months back."
"Had a split second where I saw him coming and realized what was about to happen."
"I thought I was going to die."- jolalolalulu
Big Sister to the Rescue.
"Saved my sisters life."
"We were boating and my parents just kinda assumed we’d be ok with them only out a couple hundred feet."
"I was about 17 and she was about 7."
"I’m laying there chilling and see her slip and fall into the water and just straight up sink."
"Ran over, dove in and pulled her to shore."
"She spit up a bunch of water and was fine but that experience rocked me to my core."
"Not a super crazy story but almost seeing a sibling die has always stuck with me."
"I’ve broken almost every bone in my body, I died one time and was in a coma for a little bit but for some reason this one stuck with me."- Present-Trip5231
Often, an experience that left us scared does make for a good story down the line.
Though whether it was a good enough story to make having gone through the experience worth it, is debatable.
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Having to work for a living is hard work.
Some jobs come with difficulty and two extra sides of stress.
So the last thing people need is unwarranted hate.
I'm so glad I work from home. Writing alone.
I have issues with me, but that I can deal with.
I do hate internet issues.
But that is warranted.
Redditor PM_ME_URFOOD wanted to talk about the jobs where a ridiculous amount of vitriol is all part of a days work. They asked:
"What profession gets an unjustified amount of hate?"
Waiting tables was always the bane of my existence. Customers are rude. Staff is rude. It never ends.
Filthy Hours
"Trash men. They’re looked down on as dirty and uneducated, but they do a hard job that is absolutely critical to our public health."
kirkl3s
You're Out!
"Youth sports officials. I umpire baseball as a hobby and the way parents act is deplorable."
kennsing75
"The parents on the other hand deserve loads of hate sometimes. I was a coach for soccer and volleyball while I was in the Air Force. You would have loved to be a sports official for our leagues at our base. If a parent got sh**ty they are immediately ejected, no questions, and reported to whoever is their higher authority. It almost never happened."
DaniTheLovebug
Behind the Counter
"Any customer (client/patient) facing job. They get the abuse that stems from managements decisions, mistakes and incompetence."
HighlyOffensive10
"I did customer service for automotive companies at a call center for years. People get so unhinged, between dealerships, management, people calling into the wrong department, angry customers who were itching for a fight over a rental car. The job paid for five free therapy sessions a year, but honestly, it would take every ounce of restraint not to break some days."
"You aren't allowed to defend yourself or hang up, you can't transfer them to supervisors for a call, you technically work for a third party company that exists to keep the customer from ever actually speaking to the corporation. It was the worst job I've ever had, and that's coming from someone who used to work at a seafood processing plant."
Bromelia_and_Bismuth
I'm Hungry
"Food service. The workers have to eat too, you know."
stinky_cheese33
"Working fast food sucked. Not because the job was hard. But because people were *icks. For like, no reason. Working in an actual kitchen also sucked. Not because the work was hard, but because you never did it quick enough and your boss was a *ick for like no reason. But at least you didn't deal with customers."
thedankbank1021
Too much stress...
"Defense attorneys. People hate them because they defend violent criminals. However, as one lawyer put it, their job is not just to defend these people; their job is also to make sure that the cops did their job correctly."
TomoyoHoshijiro
I've always wondered about defense attorneys. How do they reconcile their morals?
They're Smart Too
"I live in Germany and currently in my (hopefully) last semester of university to become a pharmacist (4 years of university, one practical year and three exams of state required). A lot of people here think pharmacists are only cashiers and don’t know we get a scientific education. And God help me if I question a doctor's decision."
this_is_lune
Hard Hours
"I usually just lurk as a guest, but I made a Reddit account just for this. Cooks for public schools. They are constantly overworked, underpaid, and disrespected. Most schools have only a few ovens and microwaves, so school chefs have to either jam unsafe amounts of frozen food into ovens and microwaves, which is a giant fire hazard, or work non-stop from early morning."
Clingitty
Green Thumbed
"Plant breeders and plant geneticists. Imagine you're a plant nerd and you spend your life studying genetics so you can figure out how to improve food crops. Like, to make them yield more, taste better, be healthier, survive drought, etc. But on the internet, you're apparently trying to poison the world and control the food supply."
kjhvm
Heartless
"Veterinarians. My doctors CONSTANTLY get yelled at or called heartless when, for instance, we refer them to a hospital more suited to care for the animal than us. Like bro we didn't just tell you know we are giving you options and trying to ensure you seek the proper care. Don't call me a heartless b**tard for that crap."
Zfullz
No Fun Involved
"Janitors. Trash-related work. Sewage workers. Plumbing."'
SubiWhale
I feel for everyone in these jobs. They deserve better.
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Short of having a shopping addiction, no one actually likes spending money on stuff.
Why would you ever willingly give it away? It's your money!
Which might be why it feels so bad when you have to spend money of something that should be free from the beginning. People/ corporations are going to chase that cheddar, though, so there's little you can do besides complain, which frankly might be the best thing the internet is for.
Reddit user, woodside37, wanted to know what we should never have to pay for again when they asked:
"What should be free?"
Let's get these out of the way first...No, let's get this first one out of the way first.
Hidden fees are the worst.
Hidden. F***ing. Fees.
"Transaction/processing fees when you order a digital product online. Such as a concert ticket, where you pay 6 euro extra while you pay online, and have to print the ticket yourself."
rickmitchel
"Or processing fees to pay bills that you need. Duke energy charges a $7 processing fee for you to pay your energy bill. Like wtf."
CrispyCrunchyPoptart
Pay To Pee
"Public bathrooms! The amount of human piles of poop around because the homeless have no where to relieve themselves!"
AuntyMarcy
"Live in a very tourist-y part of the U.K., all public toilets charge and most cafes/pubs/libraries won’t let people use their toilets. As someone who lives here year round it’s really frustrating and doesn’t seem to make sense."
JonesNewport83
Want A Better Society? Educate Them.
"College. Or at the very least, college APPLICATIONS. If you're gonna require it for most careers, atleast make it accessible for people. And I just think it's stupid that people have to pay to get rejected."
callmeventibcimavent
"Oh god I hate that so much. Same with applying to apartments it’s such a waste of money if you don’t get approved. It racks up quickly too."
Kydra96
It does feel grimy when "official documentation" that is "mandatory" has to be bought and paid for not by the people requiring it, but by the people needing it.
Forcing Us To Pay For Something We're Forced To Have
"ID cards issued by the government. Especially since you need them for almost every aspect of daily living."
waqasnaseem07
"I. Exist."
"Birth certificates"
alexchico3
"I'm not the biggest fan of free stuf but having to pay for a piece of paper that says "I exist" is ridiculous."
Spaghetti-Evan1991
It'll never not feel bad having to pay for something we expect to be free, but it feels ten times worse when it's something you need to get by in life. As in, need to live.
Let's All Agree To Take Care Of Each Other
"All base needs up to a level. I mean stuff we need to survive, eg. power, water,... and things we are required to use to be relevant in daily life internet,..."
"Seeing how now power companies are fuel companies are having THE biggest profit in years while more and more families are pushed into bigger and bigger deths just to get by."
"Same goes for internet tbh, poor kids are just not getting by in school becasue they lack the basic stuff every other kid has to get further in life. I am not saying they need the fastest possible internet with unlimited dl, but give them so they can work for school so the vicious cycle can be broken."
Amelsander
We Need It More Than Anyone
"All mental health services. If you don’t have benefits or a VERY good paying job, they are unaffordable for how often most people really need them. At $120-160/ session even once a week is not affordable for most people these days"
pennylayne77
A Fine Line Between Need And Want
"Water"
selfishnerd77
"Drinking water, sure. But water is an expendable resource and it should honestly be more restricted when we think about cases like people watering their lawns."
I_Am_Become_Dream
Paying To Live
"Insulin. People are dying because of greedy pharmaceutical companies."
Astronimus123
"But We're 'Pro-Life'" - Jerks
"Birth control of all kinds."
"For anyone who b*tches about spending taxpayer money, I'd ask whether it costs more to provide condoms or to house prisoners."
AlexReynard
"Giving birth (In the us)"
z0k0n
"As a female US citizen the more I learn about the whole giving birth sh*t the less I want kids. My friend just had a baby, there were some complications. She is now paying off a 14k hospital bill! The lowest I have hears is 8k. 8k just to have a f-cking kid! For a country that is gung-ho about forcing women to have kids they have missed the mark completely."
Main-Yogurtcloset-82
Everyone is looking for their payout, and unfortunately sometimes we're the ones who have to give it to them, whether it makes sense or not.
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The worst part of having breasts is Florida.
I didn't even say large breasts. Just breasts, any breasts. Florida and breasts are mortal enemies sworn to battle one another into oblivion until the end of days.
In other states, you and your ladies can live a more peaceful life. Here in Florida, it's A Song of Sweat And Fire Ants.
Ever get tiny little jellyfish stuck under your side-boob? Happens here all the time.
Bikinis should come with a "Sand Lice, Your Titty Crease, And You" informational pamphlet.
Wanna jog? Hope you accounted for the fact that the air is soup and will chafe and cauterize your nipples.
Know what limits your field of vision, making you more likely to accidentally step on a snake and/or gator? Boobs.
Know what slows you down as you try to escape the angry reptile from the above paragraph? Also boobs.
Reddit user Saibotnl1 asked:
"What's the most negative thing about having boobs?"
Now take all this stuff they said sucked, and then put it inside of a steam oven filled with mosquitos. That's Florida.
And Florida is incompatibile with breasts.
Cardio Is Hardio
"I love them but running can be a nuisance even in a good sports bra."
- [Reddit]
"When I go to work, there is a woman that usually runs on the shoulder of the road. I gasp at how much her boobs bounce. Isn't that doing damage to tissue? Painful?"
- notanotherbreach
"Yes! I literally always hold mine when going up/down stairs so they dont bounce. Running is uncomfortable even with a good bra :/ "
- k_g94
"If it's a sports bra that holds you, it's so tight that it's impossible to get into or out of without a whole team of people like a pit crew."
"If you can comfortably get into it, it won't hold the girls for long."
"Cardio is just not worth all this."
-[Reddit]
"As a kid I wasn't fit enough for jump rope, but now that I'm older and have the big boobies it feels even more impossible to ever indulge in."
- PoiLethe
Literally In The Way
"They get in the way!!"
"Lately I've been getting frustrated with exercise. My personal trainer will say to hold something a certain way and I'll try but it's so uncomfortable because my boobs are completely in the way."
"She has small boobs so she doesn't account for them being in that space right in front of your chest."
- J09Lynn
"My English teacher in 10th grade was drinking water one day when a few drops landed on his shirt. He then complained about getting older and how he never stuck out far enough to get his shirt wet."
"I just sighed."
"4th grade. 4th grade is when I stuck out too much to avoid drips."
- wheredMyArmourGo
"So very much this."
"I refuse to do mountain climbers when my trainer suggests it, she started to get mad saying it's a great exercise. My retort was that I'd really rather not knee myself in the breasts as part of my workout."
"The lady has small boobs and replied that she had never thought of that!"
- Pauliester
Growing Pains
"Probably growing them."
"It hurts, and if you get big boobs young and quickly, it’s both physical and social agony."
"It hurts to grow them, first of all, your chest aches and bumping them against anything really hurts - and since they’re a sudden, large addition to your body, you’re ALWAYS bumping them on stuff."
"But the social aspect is worse."
"Your female family members comment on them slyly and smirk at your response."
"Your male friends look at you weird and you have to realize they see you as more sexual than girls with smaller chests, even though you literally cannot control this."
"Other girls can be nasty and jealous."
"Eventually I learned to manage all this and I like having breasts now; but from like 11-16 I was so frustrated and upset that I had developed them at all."
- Individual_Ad_7523
Two Volcanos
"The sweat and itch!"
"Also that they're like two volcanos, which isn't especially practical during summers or when you're a constantly hot temperatured person anyway."
- Queen-of-meme
"No matter what I try, the skin under my boobs never cools down!"
- Local_Masterpiece_
"Boob sweat is the bane of my existence when it's even a little bit hot outside - and sometimes even when it's not lol..."
- PleasuredMeatStick
"I hate the feeling of sweat on my boobs. I just put tissue between and underneath my boobs to hopefully absorb the sweat so it won’t start to itch and drip."
- LuckyBugHarley
Technological Advancements
"I STILL am not able to remove them after a long day. Why?!"
"Why can't I just set em aside for the night, all done. Why hasn't technology advanced to this possibility yet??"
- IAmNotLookingatYou
"Absolutely they would. The relief we would get ... oh my god it sounds divine."
"Maybe I wouldn’t be so b*tchy."
- Object_Prize
"I’d honestly probably only wear them for ren faire, and leave them at home the rest of the year."
- AbbyNormalKnits
Double Trouble
"The double standard of girls with small chests and big chests."
"If you have a big chest no matter what you wear or do it's sexual. But for girls with smaller chests they can get away with crop tops or v necks or even swim suits."
- BigBunsLittleBunbun
"Lol the bigger girls who spent their entire grade school years getting sent to the principal's office for breaking dress code will agree with you."
"Loose shirts will tent and billow up in the wind as you walk-- dress coded."
"Tight shirts that don't tent but cling to your chest-- dress coded."
"And don't even think about anything but a crew neckline, or you'll be dress coded again."
- cryptic-coyote
"Exactly!"
"I always got in trouble for wearing dresses in school, but skinny Minnie wearing something even worse gets by no problem just because she doesn't fill it out the way I do."
- APD2269
Expensive
"They're expensive."
"Bras are expensive and you need regular bras, sports bras, probably something special like a strapless or low back if you have a special occasion or something."
"And don't even get me started on women's healthcare ..."
- SailorSpoon11
"Stage 4 breast cancer patient here, and it costs me about an extra $5000/yr to stay alive if everything goes well."
- insertcaffeine
"I just stopped breastfeeding and none of my bras fit anymore."
"I’ve just been wearing sports bras every day because I don’t even know what cup size I am anymore and I don’t want to spend a fortune replacing all of my bras."
- kaytay3000
"Plus if you choose not to wear bras for any number of reasons, you’re treated as deviant or an acceptable target of inappropriate attentions."
- letsjumpintheocean
Getting Comfortable
"Laying on your stomach can be tricky."
- ChadweenaThundervag
"Laying on your back can be tricky as well."
"And on your side."
"Just laying in general with big boobs is a hassle."
- Skkaj225
"Am guy."
"However women in my life have found it difficult to get a decent back massage because of this. I've seen plenty of massage tables with head holes, but none with boob support..."
- DeluxeWafer
"Semi-suffocating yourself on the beach while trying to get some sun on your back is fun."
- Miikami
Either Or
"The fact that I look like a walking refrigerator if I wear a loose fitting top, as it billows shapelessly around my body in an odd fabric rectangle."
"But if I wear something form fitting, I look like a lady of the night and am treated as such."
- batchofbetterbutter
"OMG this !!"
"I feel like all my girlfriends around me have such a fashion sense and can wear things with such grace but I always look as you’ve described. Like either I look like a couch pillow or Jessica Rabbit."
"Sometimes I just want to cut them off honestly."
- octokisu
"Yeah I’ve been wanting a reduction since a was a teen because of the back pain and catcalling, and many people I know with a bigger chest feel the same way."
- didithedragon
"I had no idea women hated their boobs so much! It honestly is shining a light on an idea I have never thought of."
- Peter_the_pear
Attempted Murder
"They might try to kill me."
"Breast cancer runs in my family and I have to have my first mammogram this year at 36."
"My mom was negative for both BRCA genes but there are 6 others they’ve discovered since she had cancer that we haven’t been tested for."
"Insurance won’t cover me to test unless she tests positive for one."
- Outrageous-Proof4630
"Fun fun fun."
"My mom died from breast cancer at 46. I started getting mammograms at 34."
"Luckily, I took the BRCA test and was negative."
- lil_ho_on_da_prairie
It's Constant
"Constantly being sexualized."
"I’m the least sexual person but people assume I’m super sexual because of my body. And I hate it"
- Plus_Bison_7091
"Yup, I'm ace and I honestly just want them chopped off to be rid of the constant sexualization of my body."
"It makes me really uncomfortable."
- zapsquad
"My friend in elementary school had a condition where she went into puberty super early and had large breasts by 3rd grade."
"We would walk together to elementary school every morning and get cat called a lot, but we were too afraid to tell our parents because we thought they wouldn't let us walk together anymore."
"She would have teachers make comments about them."
"When we were older she talked about how insanely awful and alienating it made her feel growing up. Her younger sister had the same condition, but went on puberty blockers for it."
- gentlybeepingheart
Destroyed
"These pendulous bags of hell have destroyed my back."
"Even a decade after a reduction surgery, I remain in daily pain. And now as an added bonus they get to be misshapen, scarred horribly, and completely useless for raising a baby."
- Originalluff
"I didn’t realize how heavy they are until I got together with girl with big boobs and woooooow they are heavy!"
- I_love_pillows
"I got C cups in fifth grade and those f*ckers went all the way to G by senior year."
"My posture was/is awful and I've felt like an old woman since I was a teenager. I don't even want babies, so they're never actually gonna be useful either."
- Rozeline
See what I mean?
They're kind of awful once they hit a certain size, and that size is pretty much ANY size if you're in Florida.
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