As a student, it's hard to keep up with everything that's going on at school. Sometimes, you get a test only to realize you have no clue what the answers are to the questions. So what do you do? Well these teachers share the funniest answers students have given to a question on a test.
1/21. A third grader's homework was to define vocabulary words, and one of them was "parent."
His definition: "Adults who own you."
2/21. Made up quotes in a religion exam, "the bible says 'thou shalt not lotto'".
3/21. I used to mark chemistry papers for a university. There was a question - the content I can't recall - but an essay style answer was required. Anyway this one student had a complete mind blank and instead wrote this elaborate story about a lonely dragon who couldn't make friends. So lots of different animals would take pity on him and try to be his friend but in his excitement he would set them on fire.
To this day I wonder if the dragon ever made any friends without accidentally killing them, poor guy.
4/21. From my time as an English teacher in Japan is both funny and sad.
Question: Please tell us about your future dreams.
Answer: I want to be a nurse. Nurse can study math. But I can't study math. I don't like math. So I can't be a nurse. And I don't have a dream now.
5/21. Q: Why did Mao and his communists march through the snowy mountains?
A: To avoid the Mines of Moria.
More hilarious answers on the next page!
6/21. "How does dietary fibre aids in digestion?"
It smoothens the sh*t.
7/21. I remember that there was once in our Chinese character test, we had to figure out what meant. It's a proverb and roughly means 'A school's dog will be able to read and write in 3 years' (you get affected by what you're with) but a kid wrote "If you can't figure it out in 3 years, you're stupider than a dog."
8/21. I was taking my driver's test, this had been written under a question:
Q: "How much is the fine for fleeing an officer?"
A: Nothing, if you're fast.
9/21. A student wrote an advertisement for the new season of 24 in the top corner of the paper. Strange but it did remind me to watch it.
10/21. Not a teacher but as a secondary school student I completely forgot what metallic bonding was in my chemistry exam (the real one, not the mock).
So, in the 10 minutes I had left over at the end, after I'd finished all the other questions, I drew a diagram of an iron atom and a magnesium atom with speech bubbles depicting their conversation. Things like "hi there, how's your day been?" and similarly friendly things.
At the bottom, I wrote a caption saying:
As you can see, these metallic atoms are bonding. They will be friends in no time.
More unbelievable answers on the next page!
11/21. I had my students in U.S. History create advertisements to convince people to move onto the Great Plains. One student simply drew a donkey and wrote "bring that a** here boy!"
12/21. In French GSCE speaking exam :
She was meant to say : J'ai voyag en avion (I travelled on a plane).
She said : J'ai viol en avion. (I raped on a plane).
Oh how we laughed. She didn't have a clue what she said though.
13/21. This was an answer from one of my classmates. When it was marked wrong, we complained until he changed her grade.
Q: Can you explain the effects of the German attack on the Netherlands in 1940?
A: No.
14/21. Had a student turn in some code with profanity in the comments. In their defence, R deserves that kind of response.
I told them officially I have to give them a talk about professionalism, and unofficially my thesis has far worse in it.
15/21. In a calculus course:
Q: Define Simpson's Rule
A: Drew a picture of Bart Simpson saying "Don't have a cow, man!"
16/21.List 3 different gasses:
Air
Farts
Gravity
Continue onto the next page for more hilarious answers!
17/21. I had my students do a writing assignment where the point was to write a story with the group, but each student could only write one sentence before passing to the next student to continue with the next sentence.
Student 1 wrote: Once upon a time there were four friends who went on a vacation.
Student 2: They decided to go to a cabin in the woods.
Student 3: This story is stupid.
Student 4: It gets better when they get to the cabin.
18/21. On a thermodynamics test, the students had to define "adiabatic." One student answered "someone who needs insulin." I think I gave them half credit.
19/21. If a test in our country is failed by more than 70% of the class it has to be repeated. Your grade will be the better of either the repeated or the original test. This kid had aced the first one and couldn't improve. Instead of doing his math he wrote a recipe for cheesecake. And that was surprisingly good.
20/21. A student wrote, "I don't know, I'm sorry, I didn't study, dishonor on my family and my cow." She drew the saddest cow on the bottom of the page. Glad she's been watching Mulan.
21/21. I asked students what data structure would be appropriate for applying Dijkstra's algorithm and this moron put down a binary search tree instead of a queue! Haha, what a goofball!
Redditor Deviant55 wanted to talk about physical intimacy in relationships, so they asked:
"How important is sex to you in a relationship? Could you be with someone you love even if sex was off the table indefinitely?"
I learned how much sex matters in my last relationship.
Once I wasn't interested, it kind of killed everything.
Forever
GIF by moodmanGiphy"When my wife of 30+ years became too ill for sex to be even remotely interesting for her, I certainly did not end the relationship. I loved her and I took care of her until she died. No other course even occurred to me."
fvillion
Frustration
"When I met my wife we couldn’t keep our hands off each other. This lasted a few years. I was in my mid-twenties when we married. She developed a chronic medical issue. I’ve gone twenty years being sexually frustrated. There are stages and phases to this."
"What I came to realize is that I love my wife. Yes, sex is important in our relationship. But I would rather have her in my life with no sex than have sex without her."
"The thing is, I love her. She can’t help her situation. I can’t help it. One deals with it. Marriage is more than sex. It is building a life and memories, raising a family, and loving each other regardless of the challenges life throws our way. But sex is very important. It helps keep the closeness and the emotional bond. But it isn’t the only thing that does that."
QuietusNoctis
I Love Her
"It is complicated. I am in a near-sexless marriage. The wife needs antidepressants to function. And it kills her libido. So usually it is four to six times a year. My libido rages. And yeah, it sucks. I dream of more sex."
"But I love the chick. She loves me to the moon and back. I’m not willing to sacrifice her love so I can try dating again. Divorce rates these days? And I found a woman who more than tolerates me, she loves me. I’ll stay. And not to be crude but yeah I masturbate. A lot. She doesn’t begrudge me that. Occasionally she even encourages it."
"She went off her meds for a while. And man did we do it. But she was a mess. I need her healthy more than I need a shag. We travel together. We enjoy each other’s company. We actually like each other. I could claim that it is hell, but I choose to see all of the good I am blessed with."
painthawg_goose
Heartless
"Quite important. But I think it depends on where you are in the relationship. I've been married for 10 years. I have kids. If my wife suddenly couldn't have sex with me for some reason -- illness or injury or something -- I'm not divorcing her over it. That's heartless."
"Now, if she just decided we weren't ever having sex again because she didn't feel like it, that'd be different. Or if I was just starting to date someone and they told me they'd never have sex, I probably just wouldn't keep pursuing the relationship. Plenty of people out there who will."
Arkhangelzk
Necessity
"It depends on the circumstances. I LOVE doing it with my man but I love his heart and soul more. If we had to stop having sex for medical reasons or something I’d definitely stay with him and stay faithful. If I was single, I think it’s unlikely I’d start a new relationship knowing it would be sex free."
Fit_Technology8240
Heart and soul is just as necessary and hot and sweaty.
At least a lot of people recognize that.
Percentages
Giphy"Sex life is 10% of a relationship when it’s good and 90% of a relationship when it’s bad."
jakovichontwitch
"The other way I've heard it put is that sex is like the bathroom in your house. It's not the only reason you bought the house, but if it's not working it's a big problem."
molten_dragon
Age Related
"50-year-old here married for 27 years. It’s not important. It was important when we were younger but honestly, if sex wasn’t possible I would still love my wife and really nothing about our day would really change."
Kantforall
"I’ve been reading these comments and wishing that everyone’s age was flared on their post because I sense that there are a lot of under-60-year-olds. I am older than my wife but she is starting menopause and I can see the writing on the wall. Not super thrilled but I love her completely and understand. The real intimacy is in how we still (and will always) want to sleep touching each other and waking up next to each other."
caffeinated-hijinx
Kiss Me
"I honestly considered this before. I absolutely adored this guy. It was like a child relationship; we'd kiss and cuddle and hold hands and things, but he wouldn't have sex with me, nor would he commit properly. Any time we came close to sex, he'd go soft or back off."
"I couldn't understand it, wondered if I could keep doing that. My sex drive was wild. Why kiss and the rest but not sex?"
"Then one day he told me he was in love with me and asked me out properly. I said yes there and then, had a wonderful day with him, but when I went home, I was left questioning if I could possibly live without sex. I decided that yeah, I loved him but it would be tough."
"We had sex the next day. So yes, I think I probably could."
Adventurous_Train_48
Touchy/affectionate...
"It's very important. I'm a very affectionate and physical person and touch/caresses and anything physical is one of my love languages. I couldn't function with someone who is the opposite of me or who's uncomfortable with how I am. I already was in a relationship with someone who wasn't that touchy/affectionate and it created frustration for both of us."
Borboleta77
Don't Look at Me
"I am in a sexless relationship. He has erectile dysfunction and I really don't like sex in general. I'm really uncomfortable naked or even vulnerable. I'm shy around him despite the relationship being 10 years nearly, I'm even shy around my family and friends. Everything about sex makes me feel so embarrassed, and I feel nothing but negative feelings when I used to be sexually active. Not through choice of partner, I just hate that sort of attention."
NucularOrchid
Definitive!
Shake Handshake GIF by OriginalsGiphy"10/10. Sexual incompatibility is a deal breaker!"
oeeiae
Sex is important but not everything.
Until it is everything if it becomes an issue.
Good luck couples. Open and honest communication is key.
