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People Explain Which Things Are Surprisingly Safe For Human Consumption

People Explain Which Things Are Surprisingly Safe For Human Consumption
Image by 1045373 from Pixabay

Human beings--especially children--can be pretty ridiculous.

Somehow, even after infancy is long behind us, we still insist on interacting with the world through our mouths.

Chemicals, far-out organic materials, and even inanimate objects are all liable to become sudden victims of the saliva portal.

The truly remarkable thing? Some people take those broad-brush diets far into adulthood.

Nazamroth asked, "What is, surprisingly, safe for human consumption?"

For many people, it's the home hygiene products that are the most tempting.

All those creams, jellies, and vibrant liquids are evidently begging to grace a tongue.

Internal Perfume 

"A whole box of Nivea cream apparently. I ate an entire box of Nivea cream when I was a toddler and the only aftereffect was that my poop smelled nice for a while." -- nina_wants_to_fly

"My biology teacher told us she likes the taste of Nivea cream, and when she uses it she always eats a little bit." -- MLGRadish

"Who wouldn't want nice smelling poop" -- humaneclair

Down the Hatch 

"Had a severely alcoholic patient drink two large bottles of Mouth Wash (Listerine etc) every day for about 15 years."

"You'd think nearly 10,000 bottles of Mouth Wash would kill a man, but no. At least, not very quickly."

-- ExtremePrivilege

Ingesting Jelly 

"Petroleum Jelly - small amounts have been used as laxative and stool softener." -- Forever000Anon

"According to my grandfather, (who passed at 88) Vick's Vapo-Rub." -- DeadLined784

"The person who created Vaseline thought is was a miracle salve and would have a spoonful a day. He lived a long life and attributed it to Vaseline" -- Crazed_waffle_party

At least those examples of hygiene treats made a minute amount of sense. After all, those creams are at least used in and around the face.

For the others out here eating chemicals even more distant from human diets, I don't what the excuse is.

Slurp 

"Ballistol"

"It's a general purpose oil for lubrication and rust protection and can be used for metal, wood, and leather."

"It's completely safe to drink, and it even smells like licorice."

-- Skruestik

Just in Case 

"The little stickers on the fruit you buy in the store. Even the glue for them are FDA approved." -- prophecy623

"I mean, if the USA banned Kinder Surprise because the GIANT CONTAINER INSIDE, that was UNMISTAKABLY not made to be eaten and that was in no way at risk of being eaten, was not edible, I expect something that is glued to my food to be edible." -- neos7m

Organic Sourcing 

"Shellac."

"Yes. The stuff they use to seal wood. It's used in everything from finger nail polish to candy. Its secreted by a bug. Yummy."

-- Atomsteel

Finally, some people apparently figure if a thing is of the earth at all, it's fair game to toss down the throat.

You'd be surprised just how much of the natural world around us is edible.

Needles!

'"Euell Gibbons: "Many parts of the pine tree are edible.' " -- drburns650

"Pine needle tea is a very good source of vitamin c" -- Mrslinkydragon

No Waste 

"You can eat everything inside of a natural beehive, including the bees. Just don't get stung!" -- Tinyfishy

"My roommate didn't belive me when I got honeycomb from a local farmers market and ate it by the spoonful. Usually I just crush it to get the honey out then spit out the comb, but I chewed up and swallowed a whole chunk just to prove to him that you could do it." -- Witness_me_Karsa

Mmmmm Ground 

"Some indigenous tribes eat clay in small amounts due to the minerals and texture." -- ritzpheonix15

"I have two cousins adopted from a Haitian orphanage. The orphanage basically took lard and mixed it with small amounts of dirt to feed to the kids."

"I imagine it was more 'filler' than any notable benefits, but still, crazy to think about." -- No_Help_Accountant

On the Edge 

"Pokeweed is edible if cooked properly. I remember my BIL's dad made poke salad."

"He said the idea is to cook 'most' of the poison out, but leave enough for your lips to tingle."

-- ThatPooreGirl


Please do not interpret this list as license to go putting all kinds of things into your mouth. Always consult a trusted expert before dragging your tongue along some chemical or obscure plant.

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safe

Things People Secretly Love But Would Never Admit To In Public

Reddit user sweet_chick283 asked: 'What do you secretly love that you would never admit to in public?;

Collection of VHS tapes
Bruno Guerrero/Unsplash

What makes us all unique is our passions and the things we love, whether it's singing in the shower, reading books, or listening to specific music artists.

Unfortunately, we live in a world where we are judged for our various tastes and interests thanks to social media, and it makes us consciously selective about sharing the things we love on the internet.

Curious to hear about people's personal desires under anonymity, Redditor sweet_chick283 asked:

"What do you secretly love that you would never admit to in public?"

These aren't really chores for the following Redditors.

Good Clean Fun

"Mopping, im a janitor and generally hate my work... but damn mopping is so good."

– MrDDog06

"When you have a great rhythm going it is something special. I get the same feeling while I vacuum, but won’t let my wife know I enjoy it."

– Bogus_34

Act Of Unwrinkling

"Ironing clothes. A dozen of them. Can’t explain how it relaxes me. I told one person and they looked at me like I’m crazy."

– eerie_white_glow

"My mum misses the days when dad would be out on a Friday night, my brother out with friends and me upstairs quietly playing PS1. She would pour herself a Bacardi & Coke and do the ironing while watching her TV shows."

"I'm sure she doesn't really miss it now that we've moved out and they've retired but it was her wind-down after a busy working week so I can see how people can find it relaxing."

– xdq

Our solo actions can spark joy.

Big Brother Is Watching

"pretending to be on the Truman show and whenever im in my house i act all inconspicuous so they dont know that i know that they’re watching me."

– Bec_121

"C’mon man, you’re not supposed to let him know. You signed a contract when signing up for live views. I’m reporting you."

– doeswaspsmakehoney

The Multi-Tasker

"Playing video games naked at home while eating cheese."

– thickening_agent

Releasing The Kraken

"I love the feeling when you've eaten good fibre and let out a solid long train log in the toilet. That feeling is heavenly."

– therapoootic

"Even better when it’s a clean wipe and not a poo crayon."

– TheWarmestHugz

Ultimate Comfort

"My (male 41) weekend routine is coming home from work, make hot chocolate, start a fire, dress in a ugly pink nightgown made for old ladies and watch forensic files."

– crazyloomis

Some people are obsessed with collecting things.

So Kawai

"Sanrio stationery stores. All those different multicolor pens, a thousand kinds of erasers, spiral bound notebooks galore... my kids sadly have absolutely no appreciation for this wonderland..."

– HavingNotAttained

It's A Staple

"Office supplies have a weird, special place in my heart ever since I was a kid. They don't even have to be 'cute' necessarily."

"Japan's legendary stationery stores is unironically a reason I want to go."

– _CozyLavender_

Not Caring Anymore

"The older I get the shorter that list gets. Not because I love less things, but because I don't care about hiding it."

– Bi-Beast

"YES!! I'm 53 now. I'm working my first job in public since 2006. Today is Halloween and we're allowed to dress up so I am sitting here waiting to go to work dressed as a VERY bad Wednesday Addams. My bf said I'd 'look stupid' because no one else will probably dress up and I'm like, 'WHO CARES!' My makeup looks horrible and not like I practiced, but I DO NOT CARE! I'm having fun with it anyhow and I don't care if my coworkers dress up or not. I'm bein' ME! :)"

– deanie1970

Honorable mentions start here.

The Savior

"Picking up worms from the street and sidewalks when it rains and moving them into the dirt so they don’t burn in the sun, every time it rains I do this."

– sky_kitten89

Hero Of The Moment

"Yoooo I scoot SO many snails and worms. I work as a tech/mechanic at an automotive shop, I had a peoject car towed to my house the other day and it was covered in snails. I saw them when the tow guy/coworker was unloading and I was like, 'oh! It comes with free snails!' and began moving them. He laughed then realized and said, '... Oh, you're serious. Uh... Okay.'"

"I don't care who knows it. These little things barely can look out for themselves, why shouldn't we if we can take a moment to help? I don't care what happens next, it probably doesn't matter overall but I can help this moment."

– chris14020

Why should some of the hidden desires mentioned above have to be secret?

Redditors opening up about some of these would make them a hit at parties–no shaming.

As a matter of fact, I'll totally be down for a Forensic Files viewing party where we all make hot chocolate, light the fireplace, and cozy up together in our respective pink ugly nightgowns for old ladies.

secret

Historical Events So Ridiculous They Sound Made Up

historical reenactors
Sigmund on Unsplash

We've probably all heard some variation of the saying "Truth is stranger than fiction."

Real life isn't just strange, it can also be downright ridiculous.

History is riddled with moments of absurdity.

So ridiculous that people have a hard time believing real life is, well, really real.

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history

The Most Embarrassing Things People Have Ever Googled

woman in black long sleeve shirt covering her face
Ivan Aleksic on Unsplash

I freely admit I'm of a certain age where my primary education occurred before the age of the internet—when our questions were answered with conversations with experts, encyclopedias or knowing how to use card catalogs.

My knowledge of the Dewey Decimal System is largely useless today.

Research is drastically different now—sorry Melvil Dewey. Internet search engines quickly became the difference between occasionally finding an outdated version of the information we were looking for and rarely not finding current information on the most obscure of topics.

Unless your Google game is super weak, you're likely to find what you're looking for or something close to it unlike the good old days when our chances were hit or mis—with lots of misses.

So what do we use this amazing, life-changing tool for?

Well...

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technology