People Describe The Stupidest Self-Inflicted Injury They've Ever Gotten

How many times have you stubbed your toe because you weren't paying attention and banged it against some furniture? Hurts like hell, doesn't it? Have you ever slipped outside because you didn't realize the rain––or ice––on the roads would be so slick? You probably have (and hopefully you didn't bang yourself up too much). You probably hope no one was looking... to save yourself from certain embarrassment.

Believe it or not, there are people out there who've fared worse.

People were all too willing to share their experiences after Redditor 7937397 asked the online community,

"What is the stupidest injury you've ever gotten?"

"Then got laid off."

"Leaned forward to look at my face closely in the bathroom mirror. Vertebrae in my lower back slipped out of position. Nine weeks on disability. Then got laid off."

EmotionalAnesthesia

It's true what they say... when it rains, it really pours.

"I once injured my leg..."

"I once injured my leg by jumping off the back of a moving truck, so that I wouldn't be in trouble for riding on the back of a moving truck."

QuillWellington

"I once broke my thumb..."

"I once broke my thumb trying to give someone a hug.

Awkwardly caught it on their body and the ligament of my stretched thumb popped off and took some bone with it!"

Robletron

How did you do that?!

I mean... I know you explained it and all, but... how did you do that?!

"I wasn't watching..."

"I've hurt myself in many weird ways, so this was tough to figure out. A while ago I was riding my bike and saw a rabbit. I wasn't watching where I was going and rode off a retaining wall. I got a concussion from that."

Boonaroomoo

"When it reopened..."

"When I was 5, I was stepped on by a llama. My mom said I had a llama foot-shaped bruise on my back for a couple of weeks.

They closed the petting zoo after that. When it reopened, they no longer allowed people inside the animal pens."

glindabunny

Ah, I see now.

So you're the one who ruined it for everyone else. Gotcha.

(Great story, though.)

"When I was six..."

"When I was six my forehead was really itchy but it was one of those deep itches that you couldn't really scratch out. So my bright 6-year-old brain told me to get into an all-fours position and try rubbing my forehead into the carpet… well I did that and ended up taking a small layer of skin off that took ages to heal completely."

BootyBanditz

Imagine walking in on your kid and seeing this.

You'd think they were possessed.

"I punched myself..."

"I punched myself in the forehead during an improv comedy bit and gave myself a concussion."

jakerhamster

This begs the question...

So are you really strong?

Or just really weak?

"Severed three tendons..."

"Severed three tendons in my left hand while slicing a bagel. Basic tendon repair went over well, but my middle finger got infected. They had to put a tendon from my leg into my hand. Three surgeries over a bagel."

SafariJim

This one wins.

Sorry, everyone. You can all go home now.

"I decided..."

"I decided it would be quicker to walk down an incline of tennis-ball-sized rocks in flip flops with my hands full than walk around on the pavement. I was right - I descended quickly!"

auntiepink

"I had lost..."

"I had lost about 30 pounds, and my belt was getting too big. Most people would say "oh, time to buy a new belt!" The craftier of us might say "time to get out my leather punch!" I say "time to dig a hole in the belt with my folding pocket knife!"

It folded in on itself while I was digging a new hole in the leather and cut my thumb to the bone, and had to go to urgent care to get it stitched up.

My wife bought me a leather punching tool for Christmas that year."

JoeOutrage

We hope you're all thinking twice of playing with knives... or jumping off trucks... or even going outside.

Just stay indoors, preferably in bed. You should be safe. God-willing.

Have some stories of your own? Feel free to tell us all about them in the comments below!

Want to "know" more? Never miss another big, odd, funny, or heartbreaking moment again. Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.

CW: Suicide

There is so much to learn in life.

And once you acquire certain things mentally, you regret it.

How much 411 have you come across over time that made you think... "How can I unlearn that?"

Yeah, not possible.

Knowledge is power and sometimes it's a nightmare.

Don't we have enough to keep us up at night?

Damn curiosity.

Well let's do some learning.

Redditor RedBoyFromNewy wanted to shed some light on creepy issues we need to be discussing. They asked:

"What’s a disturbing fact that not a lot of people know of?"
Keep reading... Show less
People Share Their Craziest 'Oh You Thought This Was Bad, It Gets Worse!' Experiences
krakenimages on Unsplash

The best stories are ones with exciting plot twists.

Keep reading... Show less
People Divulge The Most Depressing Truths They've Made Peace With
Abhijith P on Unsplash

Life is full of disappointments. We lose out on a job opportunity or the one designer article of clothing we really wanted is not available in our size.

Keep reading... Show less

The truth matters.

Something one would think was a given in modern society.

Yet all over the world, there are people so unbelievably stubborn, that they simply refuse to believe the facts.

Sometimes even when presented with evidence.

This could be for something menial, such as refusing to believe that a cotton candy was actually invented by a dentist.

But sometimes, refusing to believe the truth could have serious consequences, up to and including climate change, the effectiveness of masks, and the disproportionate amount of gun violence in the US.

Redditor Lady_Of_The_Water was curious about the many things, both frivolous and serious, people refused to believe were true, leading them to ask:

"Whats something someone thought you were wrong about and ridiculed you for it, but it turns out you were right?"
Keep reading... Show less