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We all want that amazing teacher who inspires us, pushes us to do better. Every day, when the morning bell rings, gives us assignments and work that challenges us, makes us understand the world better, and proves that education is more than just grades and standardized testing.

And then, there's the kind of teachers who give assignments like these ones.


Reddit user, u/myphoneislaggy, wanted to hear:

Students of Reddit, what is the most insane assignment you have been given?

That's Not Quite Grading On A Curve

Giphy

I had an... interesting... 6th grade teacher when I was in a Catholic middle school. The assignment wasn't what was truly insane.

After taking a test (I believe the subject was U.S. history), she asked us to turn the paper over and write as many stores as we could name from our local mall on the back of our tests. After we finished, she instructed us to pass our paper to our neighbor for grading. After grading the tests proper, she instructed us to subtract 1 point for each store named.

Joke's on her, even at that age I never left the house. A friend of mine's mom worked at the mall though, and he was able to name 80+ stores. The actual test probably only had 30-50 questions. His score was well into the negatives. Her rationale was that we should be spending less of our free time out having fun and more time studying. I sh-t you not.

Every parent called the school the next day screaming. She eventually was let go, but years later and for an entirely different reason. She had thrown one of those heavy, vintage, metal Swingline staplers right at a kid's face.

That's a story for a different time though.

vidfail

How Could Any Student Succeed?

My 12th grade English teacher gave us a project of a senior "memory book". Basically 12 chapters, 2 pages per chapter of specific subjects that you could take off of a rubric, three required subjects. Three weeks to complete. Ok, sounds boring and something I don't want to do but fairly easy.

So I finish it 2 days before its due, about the time everyone else does. But then, the teacher decided to just increase the amount of required chapters from 3 to 9 the day before it was due, and she changed the required chapters, which means I had to write 9 chapters in this stupid assignment in the span of 1 day. Everyone failed the assignment and nobody liked her at all.

HaloWarrior63

Face To Face Makes Me Break Out In Hives

Actually got this assignment last monday for an entrepreneur course, i have to carry out 30 FACE TO FACE interviews (25 minutes minimum EACH) with musicians within a week. So that's 15 hours of conversation, which i have to transcribe and code and summarize all within one week.

HelixBeats

Delete All The Search Histories!

In connection with reading Madame Butterfly, we were assigned to go to the library computers, log onto the internet, and to search "Asian Women" and "Japanese Wives" among other similar terms for research on stereotypes. Luckily, I had already done extensive research on my own into.... um.... similar topics so I knew better, and was not one of the 15 or so students who got their computer access removed for searching porn on the library computers. It was an honest but hilarious mistake from a teacher that had no idea how the internet worked. This was many years ago.

OhRCiv

I'm a student of Life Sciences (Biotechnology) My "Ecology, Diversity and Evolution" Proff gave me the topic which only said, "Carrot"

Like, dude, how can I make a presentation of 15 to 20 minutes on "Carrot"? What can I say about"Carrots"?

In the end, I made a pretty respectful presentation (in my opinion), like, in which year it was first used as a vegetable, how many types are there, it's colors, etc. So the time came of the presentation, the Professor calls me to the podium, asked me my name and registration. I started my presentation, introduced myself to the class, started all the slides, read and explained everything. So, when I was just about to say goodbye, the Professor looked up from his writing pad and told me the start the presentation WHICH I JUST FINISH. It was THE WORST presentation of my life.

f-ckkkofff

Hey! An Actual Good One!

I was in a book making class. I expected to learn about binding and covering and all that. The teacher was your classic kooky artist type and she got all excited and announced dramatically "I want each of you to make a book....out of THIS" and presented us each with a cardboard coffee can. I guess she just had dozens of them saved in her home and figured it could be a stimulating challenge to have us use them.

It did end up being fairly interesting. We had to first agree on the true definition of a "book." We decided that it was any object that presents information in a specific sequence.

I filled my coffee can with cement and then glued foam letters on the outside, so that when you rolled it in ink, and then rolled it across a large piece of butcher paper, it would stamp out the words "Hello! I am a can" over and over. She loved it.

WankSpanksoff

Did The Professor Ever Say "Carpe Diem!" Unironically?

I took an experimental poetry track when I was in college. Some of our assignments included:

  • Buy a flower and watch it die
  • Egg a parking lot and write a description of the eggs without using metaphors or similes
  • Leave food out in a public space and see how long it takes for it to get eaten
  • Read your poetry out loud on the train without explaining what you are doing
  • Infiltrate a group you are not normally a part of and sew dissent
  • Bring something from home that represents how you want to die. Trade "deaths" with a peer

It was a pretty crazy class. I loved it.

SalemScout

*pulls collar out to the side to simulate discomfort*

When I was in college, I had to write a 75 page paper and print out ten copies, one for each person in the class. The topic of the paper?

Deforestation.

ostentia

Woof...That Is...Not Good.

I haven't been a student for almost a decade now, but a recent assignment went somewhat viral here in the UK.

The students were given the task of writing a letter from the perspective of a parent that had a child murdered in the Manchester Arena bombings. In this "letter" they were tasked to write, they had to express sympathy and forgiveness for those that did the bombings.

To make this even more f-cked up, this task was given to children of the Manchester area. So those poor kids had to write a letter, from the perspective of a parent, forgiving and sympathising with the people that murdered their friends and family.

xDufff

Well, Hey, At Least You Learned? Right?

Giphy

My high school science class had a project where we removed the meat from an animal's skull. It was a home project though and we weren't provided with animals - I didn't have any problem with this, but I should imagine not every kid in the class could get their hands on a severed animal head so easily.

I used a coyote, most kids had rabbits or deer but my uncle had just recently shot a coyote so that was pretty cool.

But looking back on it, that was kinda creepy and I think others in the class probably weren't okay with that one.

Either that, or a class in college that gave you three options for a final paper:

  • 48 pages in 24 hours
  • 96 pages in 48 hours
  • 144 pages in 72 hours

On a subject that will be given to you at the end of the lecture, the idea being that you finish at least two pages an hour if you don't eat or sleep or have other classes. I took the first option because it was the shortest, most people did, and it was a freakin disaster. Only thing I learned from that project was that good work takes time.

Catsh-t-Dogfart

Were You Supposed To...Cook The Baby?

To make a video on how to breastfeed and buy literally everything you need for a kid plus one of those robot baby's. The thing was atleast $100 dollars and was only a homework grade and no one did it cause it was literally not even a class related to anything on that. It was a cooking class not home ec.

fg10037

They made us do something similar for eighth grade heath (thanks to the amazing George W. Bush-era sex "ed" "curriculum"). We had to haul around 10 pounds of flour, a doll, or in my case, a Build-a-Bear with a 10 pound dumbbell shoved inside of it. They made us carry it to and from school, through all of our classes, change it every night, and write a report on it at the end of the week.

The point was to scare us out of having kids young (which didn't work), but all it did was throw my bowling game off for a couple months.

ScotTheDuck

Lifehacks, if applied properly, can really change the course of a single household chore.

Chores can really be such a pain to take care of, and nobody wants to do it. But with a little life hack under your belt, you might be able to turn chore time into something a little fun.

u/rat-avec-london asked:

What is a lifehack that seems fake, but is a true lifesaver?

Here were some of those answers.


My Finger, The Glass

If your ring gets stuck on your finger windex will slide it right off. Worked at a jewelry store for five plus years.

coykoi314

You can also use any oil (cooking, automotive... anything).

You can also reduce the size of your hand (and finger) by holding it up in the air. Chilling your hand in cold water THEN holding it up in the air for a couple minutes whilst rubbing oil &/or dishwashing fluids in there... trifecta of ring removal.

Should work on anyone that just stole Sauron's prize - though biting it off also works, i suppose.

SageSilinous

Multiple Uses

Use shaving cream as anti-fog. I used it on the inside of my motorcycle visor. Smear it on, let it dry, then rinse off and dry. It also works for bathroom mirrors. You can use it on a small spot so you can still see when you get out of the shower.

Caspers_Shadow

Shaving cream also removes the smell of urine. If you ever have to take care of someone who is old and/or sick and who wets the bed, a little shaving cream on a rag wiped over their buttocks after they are thoroughly cleaned up helps them really smell clean again.

It's a bit of a sad tip, I know, but you never know when you might end up caring for someone who needs help with things like this. Nobody wants to smell. A dab of shaving cream to restore a bit of dignity? Priceless.

Gen-Jinjur

Pretty Important For Stage Actors

Every male should know this. If you want to get rid of an awkward boner flex any muscle in your body maybe an arm. For a minute. The blood will rush to that muscle and away from your penis. Crisis averted.

GingerOverseer

These life hacks really don't seem real at all, but if you can swear by them, they can save your life.

Obligatory Poop Hack

I saw a comment on one of these kinda threads that recommended gently rocking back and forth while pooping. I've never had any problems in the bathroom, but I happened to be sitting on the toilet when I read the comment so I decided to give it a test drive. I was pleasantly surprised at how quick and effortless the whole experience was and I haven't gone back to my old stationary technique since. As a bonus, #1 and #2 now require the same amount of time in the bathroom!

ASS_LORD_666

It's The Alcohol

If you have funky armpits and need to fix them fast, use hand sanitiser. I figured this out years ago when I remembered that the smell comes from bacteria reactions - which antibacterial hand gel kills stone dead. Instant results and the medical smell lasts only a minute. Don't do this routinely though as it's delicate skin.

ihadanideaonce

But Hopefully It's Just A Playing Puppy

True lifesaver: if you are ever attacked by a dog, push your forearm INTO the bite. This pries the jaws apart and prevents them from clamping down. If a dog is attacking you, the best thing you can do is offer your forearm, push as far back as possible, and then grab the dog by the scruff of its neck with your other hand to hold it. The dog is now functionally muzzled and you have control of its head. The sooner and harder you push into the bite, the less damage the bite will do.

IAlbatross

Get It Off Anything

That rubbing alcohol removes chewing gum.

I'd go through a 20 layer deep marketing funnel to get to that tip because it really does work.

Also wow! Thank you for all of the awards nice Redditors. I completely forgot I left this comment and came back and my notifications had blown up.

omgIamafraidofreddit

And previously impossible situations will give way at long last.

Sayonara Capsaicin

Rubbing vegetable oil (or any cooking oil) on your hands after you cut up jalapeños or other hot peppers. It gets rid of the awfulness that would normally be left on your hands from the peppers. I rub my hands with oil and then wash it off with dish soap. I can totally remove my contacts after doing this. It's crazy how well this works.

PaulRuddsButthole

Crying Crying

Put your onion in the freezer for 10 minutes before chopping it. It freezes the juices just enough to slow down the process of it turning in to a gas, giving you a few minutes to chop the onion without tears. I learnt this tip from a kid's science show years ago and I haven't had to deal with onion tears since. So many people don't believe me, and then are genuinely surprised when it works.

Lost_in_the_Library

Just A Quick Little Base

The cheapest, most effective, and safest insecticide against roaches (especially those huge "water bug" roaches that we have in the South) is a spray bottle of mostly water with just a little liquid dish soap in it.

Shake the bottle & get the water a little foamy, then spray the roaches. They will run, scrabble, and attempt escape, of course, but they will die. The soap film suffocates them faster than any chemicals will.

A friend told me about this, & I thought she was nuts, but I tried it & it works amazingly well. Plus it's very easy to clean up and safe around food (not that you want to spray soapy water ON your food).

SnooPickles3213

Incorporating any of these lifehacks into your home may make a big difference. You'll never want to turn back.

Or you will, whatever. But they're worth a try!

Image by Olya Adamovich from Pixabay

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