When we purchase the latest hi-tech gadgets, we tend to toss aside the accompanying reading materials like the terms and conditions.
Or when it comes to signing a new lease for an apartment, some of us immediately scroll to the dotted line to leave our John Hancock without reading all of the fine print.
Whether they're contracts or literature that come with purchased products, do we ever really bother to read the detailed policies?
In an era of instant gratification, who has the time? But what we really should be asking is, what are we missing out on?
For those who do practice their due diligence, they may find some fascinating information – and in some cases, are rewarded for it.
Curious about what others have found while perusing through the nitty gritty, Redditor Dunnaghlasman asked:
"PPG (paint company) does not allow their paint to be used on terrorist, biohazard or nuclear facilities."
Sign First, Discuss Later
"I was asked to sign a petition for something that I generally was in agreement with, until I read the last part of it, that read something like, 'the chairman of the committee reserves the right to change the wording of this petition.'"
"So it was like, 'sign here, and we'll figure out what you signed later.'"
"You cannot use the Java programming language to control a nuclear reactor."
"I read the terms and conditions for either Windows 95 or the Windows 98 upgrade. Somewhere buried deep in the middle was a warning that the operating system should not be used to operate a nuclear power plant. I'm assuming it was a joke because it was an individually licensed product rather than a corporate license, and if they were serious about it, I would think that warning would be at the top!"
Beware of Hacks
"For no reason at all I read them for a PlayStation Network update. About the 7th page in, it stated that I would be 'relinquishing my wallet and all funds within.' I didn't update but just assumed it was fancy legal talk(mind you I was in my late teens) so I didn't report it. 3 days later I found out that the update was a hack and thousands had their information stole of their PlayStation accounts."
"My daycare's release form had a clause saying that by signing, I was giving them permission to take my kids to Canada. Canada is a day's drive away and there is absolutely no reason they would ever need to take my kids there. I crossed it off before signing."
"My mortgage documents included a clause that says that, if I ever get sued, they have the right to accelerate the loan and demand payment of the entire remaining balance. It doesn't matter if the law suit is meritorious. Just getting sued can lead to acceleration."
Property of Elon Musk
"You never own the Tesla you pay for."
The Tesla Ownership Explained
"Tesla, (and to various extents, other anti-right-to-repair companies like Mercedes, Apple, John Deere, etc.) hold that their products are intellectual property and cannot be owned by customers, instead claiming that they are effectively leased to buyers."
"Tesla has on on multiple occasions (illegally) disabled features of cars being sold used because of this."
"On my apartment rent agreement, there was one part that basically said: If you (the renter) dies then your family is responsible for paying the rest of the rent left on your contract."
"Accordingly to Photoshop ToS, you can't use Photoshop as a verb and must say 'edited with Photoshop' or similar instead of 'Photoshopped.' In Spanish it's common to use it as a verb, 'photoshoppear.'"
The Canadian Obstacle
"I'm an auto mechanic, I regularly purchase tools from tool trucks. Sometimes there's little giveaways if you spend x amount you get this scratch off ticket that could win you something blah blah."
"One time I was reading the fine print at the bottom, usual legalese stuff then the last line cracked me up - said something like 'residents of Canada will be required to complete a series of mathematical questions in order to claim their prize.'"
"What the hell did Canada do to require being punished to win a prize?"
Reading Has Rewards
"The terms and conditions for the rewards card at the grocery store I worked had 'if you've actually taken the time to read this, please email (email) with this code and the pin for your card for $500 in rewards points.'"
"And it actually did, then I started getting a new card every other month or so. Then they changed who the rewards program was with."
"The company I work for has emergency store closure procedures for in case of a zombie outbreak."
"When I discovered it I laughed and asked my boss why they put this joke in with all these serious guidelines. She was dead serious when she explained that this was a real procedure and you honestly never know. I thought she was messing with me. Apparently, I never noticed it printed in out backroom. It's required to be printed and posted in the backroom of all the company's stores."
The Gym Contract
"I read the terms and conditions before joining a gym. It said the only reason you could cancel your membership is if you moved out of the area or got injured and had a note from a doctor. Otherwise, you had to give 30 days' notice and pay 3 additional months' worth of fees. I did not join."
Canada's Got Talent ... and All Eyes On You
"I considered auditioning for the first season of Canada's Got Talent. I got the contract for auditions and read the fine print."
"'You will pay your own room, board and travel. You agree to being on camera 24/7. We can listen to your private phone calls. We can enter your room at any time to check on you and record it.'"
"I noped out of that audition fast."
"I read the warranty for my motherboard once. It said it does not cover damage from bodily fluids including urine and vomit."
In Case of an Apocalypse
"One of my old jobs said that if there was ever a contagion that resulted in people losing their minds and acting like violent, mindless, swarming animals (i.e. zombies or infected) then we would be expected to hide in bunkers, rescue our clients and not kill anyone."
Spybot S&D asks that you send the devs beer money.
Also, I'm on mobile and too lazy to Google. I got more of this thread to read first and I'll probably forget about this before I'm done.
You also agree that you will not use these products for any purposes prohibited by United States law, including, without limitation, the development, design, manufacture or production of nuclear, missiles, or chemical or biological weapons.
This is from the Terms and Conditions for Apple's iTunes.
To the Cinema
Ts and Cs for a cinema in the UK. After purchasing a ticket and choosing your seat/seats the cinema doesn't guarantee you the seats you have chosen will be available and you are encouraged to find a different seat if the one on your ticket is taken.
Alls not Wells
You can always trust Wells Fargo to serve up some real bull crap. This article shows where they screwed some people in their mortgage terms and conditions, and also briefly mentions their debit card scam.
Well this is getting some attention so I'll just leave this old gem here as well:
READ FIRSTpaid pay day GIF Giphy
So I know a few years back there was a report of a dude who read through the whole thing and actually earned a cash prize for reading it in the fine print.
I don't know the exact details. not even sure if its true or not but maybe someone has evidence.
WordWeb free version may be used indefinitely only by people who take at most two commercial flights (not more than one return flight) in any 12 month period. People who fly more than this need to purchase the Pro version if they wish to continue to use it after a 30-day trial period. que_pedo_wey
It's probably best to actually read them, but I really like using this site where they essentially provide you a TL;DR of terms & conditions from popular websites. They also grade sites on how shady their terms may be.
There was a Windows update about 15-20 years ago that had a clause buried in the EULA that you agree not to release any benchmarking figures. What really sticks in my mind though is that I used to submit a lot of stories to Slashdot at the time, and for some reason they wouldn't report that. Weird.
Listen to Aesop
This isn't quite the same, but when I was a kid I had a really cool, creepy picture book that was a satire of Aesop's fables called Squids Will Be Squids, with morals like "if someone calls and asks where your mother is, don't tell them she is out getting her moustache bleached" etc etc. Anyway, one day I was reading the small print publication stuff you get in the front of every book and there's a note from the author's in it about why nobody ever reads that page, with the moral that "you should always read the small print." Which of course I now do (for books at least), although tbf there has yet to be a payoff as good as that one.
Steamed....morning steam GIF Giphy
Technically Steam owns any and all games that you "purchase" from them. What you purchase is basically a copy of one of their games, and they reserve the right to access your library and do whatever.
because they can
Discord's Terms of Service are worded in such a way that they can literally say whatever they want is a breach of contract on a whim.
Discord can decide you have broken the Term's of Service however they so choose. You can have an entire server dedicated to something harmless, say, puppy photos, and they have the capacity to do whatever it is their punishments and sanctions propose because they can.
Save the fur babies....
I have dog shampoo that says "this product not tested on animals." But why not? How do you know it works?? Purposely putting cosmetics in an animal's eyes, or forcing them to ingest it or whatever is cruel and unnecessary. But how are you supposed to know that this dog shampoo is a safe and effective way to clean a dog if you've never tested it by using it to wash a dog??
Not really a TOS, but the old Doom II for DOS had this screen saying that if you pirated the game, you would go to hell. It would show up after you exit the game. The first Doom also had a similar screen, lol
I think in my country there is a general law that terms and conditions must be "reasonable" so that conditions like "giving away your first born" does not apply anyway.
Trouble is, reasonable means whatever you can convince a jury and or judge is reasonable. So it comes down to who has better lawyers i.e more money.
Buried Deepglow treasure chest GIF by gfaught Giphy
I was searching for a web host for my website and found a discount code buried in the content policy. It was pretty neat, even if they were the kind of place that has at least 3 discounts available at a time.
Not exactly weird but when I was buying my car insurance they asked if I had been in any previous accidents (I was) and if I was at fault (I was not). Said rates would only go up if the accident was my fault. Okay cool. So at the end when I'm looking everything over, I notice in the fine print that it says any accidents are automatically considered the driver's fault unless proven otherwise... so I send them an email and ask.
Basically they said I'd have to purchase the policy, THEN contact them with the proof that I wasn't at fault for the accident. So I bought the policy, went to my state's DMV website to get the accident report, and email it to the insurance company- one week later I get "refunded" about 1/5 of the policy cost credited to my account. I wonder how many people they've ripped off.
Once I installed an App, I think it was a game, asked me to edit, add, delete or format everything from my google drive.
The same app had other horrible terms with other apps, like with Facebook, or Instagram (basically buy your personal info from Mark).
G-suite and everything.
It was when I was setting up android work profile (The high school I'm attending rn issued us emails that route the emails through their servers) for online school. G-suite and everything. I couldn't rlly avoid the work profile thing cuz android wanted me to set it up.
Enough with context here.
I downloaded google device policy to set this up and I saw, and I quote.
"Administrators on this domain can have access to any and all data on your phone."
I was like, Hell no! They do random phone searches of the students already why give them full access!?
I then decided to do the online class stuff on my computer and do it web-based instead of giving them full access to my phone.
Lunar TermsBeopen Aeropex GIF by AfterShokz Giphy
Apple's terms and conditions have plenty of jokes in them. They even made one about faking the moon landing.
Having a ToS
The school app for a district I worked in had a ToS that essentially said that I agreed to their accessing anything on my phone or deleting what they choose, as well as using anything they find on my phone as evidence against me if they so choose to.access any other apps, documents, downloads, photos, etc... Co-workers said I was being paranoid, but the ToS for the same app in a different district had no such notation, so I don't know.
These are a few paraphrased versions of what I had to sign in order to live on campus at my university:
I give my school permission to charge me legal fees that have nothing to do with me. They also say everyone I know has given up the right to sue the school. They can kick me out at anytime with little warning, and if I do not leave with in a few days I have to pay a +$100 fee. They are not responsible for working amenities such as water. I am aware the school does not own there own dorms, even though the office that handles room and board claims otherwise.
Don't remember the exact wording, but some League-of-Legends-type game included this whole paragraph about how, by installing this software, you authorize us to monitor every process on your computer, including but not limited to keystrokes, active programs, some of their memory, browser tabs, open files and potentially their contents, and send that info back, at all times, even if the game wasn't running.
Safe to assume I did not click agree, and managed to live life having never played that game.
I found out our five year contract for argon gas automatically renews if we don't cancel 365 days before the end date. A salesman was fired from the company and told me I should read the very fine print. One year in and we sent our our cancellation form for 2024.
take the spirit....wes craven ral GIF Giphy
Gamestation (an old video game store in the UK) had an immortal soul clause. They own thousands of peoples souls!
On the Menu
I read ingredients at back of the container (shampoo,creams,food etc) because I don't have anything better to do. But I know how they scam people. Read the ingredients people.
Sign Off Please
You agree by signing this contract to have your personal information including but not limited to, photographs, public information, address and email to be shared with third parties that may not be disclosed to you.
This was to allow a company I engaged with to send me regular products for testing and giving feedback on prior to going on the open market.
The ReadMe File
Not quite Terms & Conditions, but an old-school PC space simulator game from 1995 called Tachyon: The Fringe had a unique ReadMe file. At the bottom of the ReadMe file is a few words of congratulations, and a set of coordinates for a fat stack of space cash for the late game.
Set in Stonethat's all folks GIF Giphy
That even if you haven't read the terms and conditions you still agree to them. This is pretty common for websites where they are buried in the site, but by going to the homepage you've automatically agreed to them.
WHILE REDDIT ATTEMPTS TO MAKE YOUR ACCESS TO AND USE OF OUR SERVICES SAFE, WE DO NOT REPRESENT OR WARRANT THAT OUR SERVICES OR SERVERS ARE FREE OF VIRUSES OR OTHER HARMFUL COMPONENTS.
It's not weird in a way that it shouldn't be there, just unexpected.
Also not reddit afaik, but a lot of ToS tell they have the right to give certain of your information to companies and Google is ALWAYS there.
Oh and if anyone uses one of those Do Not Track signals, companies don't give a crap about that and say that in other words in their privacy policies.
Left Without Power
I'm taking a cyberlaw and ethics course and this has been a focal point of the class. Terms and conditions leave you basically Powerless and unable to hold companies liable. There were terms and conditions on a site that literally said by accepting the terms, you would give them your first born child. Granted I believe it was a joke or experiment to see how long they could leave it in there unnoticed.
Amazon still sucks.
Not me, but when my sister was applying for a warehouse job at Amazon, she spotted a section that stated that Amazon owned all the rights for all intellectual property and products created by the employee for an indefinite amount of time even after leaving the job. In another section, there was something saying that you couldn't say anything bad about the company online or in private, again, for an indefinite amount of time even after leaving the job. Amazon still sucks.
Want my blood too....
We were interested in purchasing a house, and sent the Contract of Sale to our conveyancer as a final 'rubber stamp' before signing.
They quickly got back to us, pointing out a clause buried in the Contract. It said that we agree to forfeiting our cooling off period and all 'subject to building/pest/structural inspection' rights, and that we agreed we must proceed with the purchase no matter what. Even if the house was rotted with termites, or the vendor had blatantly hid some structural fault, they could legally 'force' us to proceed with the purchase.
The conveyancer said that the vendor's legal firm had a reputation of putting these hidden nasties in their Contracts, so she knew to scrutinize every word as soon as she saw their name on it.
Needless to say, we didn't proceed with the purchase.
A lot of chrome extensions give the developer access to your drive. This is an issue for many education extensions during remote learning. I successfully stopped my school from using one platform over another due to this issue as well.
You're Still a Feastfail april fools day GIF by Cheezburger Giphy
I read the waiver at an indoor paintball place one time. It covered everything you'd think it would cover, but that wasn't all. Insect bites and stings. Attacks from wild animals "such as bears, etc" (yes, it specified bears), and dangers such as guides incorrectly navigating rapids.
All of these things were covered.
The experience did not live up to what the waiver implied.
Is Thou Art?
In this app called PopJam in the TOS it says that the developers can freely use any art you post on the app. Kinda screwed me up for a while but I saw some user's art on the appstore banners (with the users in question credited) so it probably just means that they can "show it off" without per but still-
I've got a decent amount of animals - some fish, turtles, dogs, etc. - but out of all of them, Optimus Prime is definitely *my* pet.
He's kind of a jerk to everyone else, but a with me he's a the biggest bestest beefaroni boy.
That is an outright lie, this dog is awfully behaved and taught himself how to open doors so he stays letting mosquitos in the house and air conditioning all of South Florida instead of just my living room. I just have a soft spot for him.
But here's the thing - soft spot or not, if someone offered me $50k for this dog, my reaction wouldn't be horror because I just love my "shmoopies" and even can't imagine. I'm not that privileged.
I grew up poor, believe me I've imagined $50k a lot. "Shmoops" might get voted off the island when $50k keeps your babies safe and housed. Relax, animal lovers. Optimus Prime is in no danger of going anywhere.
Nobody is tryna pay $50k to be headbutted and farted at all day.
That fact is precisely why my reaction to someone offering me cash for him would be straight up suspicion.
Optimus is a big beautiful male pit bull with so much muscle that he has abs on his butt.
He doesn't have any official papers, and he's fixed so he can't be used for breeding.
He's not a therapy dog and doesn't do any special tricks (on purpose) and in the time it took me to write this intro he farted so loudly that he scared himself awake and then got so excited by the sudden wake up that he did 3 bunny bounces. It's clear this would not be a high-skilled-labor kind of hire, ya know?
So why would someone want to spend that much money on this dog specifically?
I'd be suspicious that anyone willing to drop serious money on him was going to try to use his size and strength in dog fights and THAT is not gonna fly with me. Not a chance.
The person offering would have to convince me that they're willing to spend that much money on a giant dumb pit bull for some non-fighting reason and that he would have a dope life. Maybe I'd say yes because they sincerely believe he's the reincarnated spirit of their college bro who died in a horrific skiing accident, and they need to take him on a cross country road trip to fulfill the last thing on their bromantic bucket list?
Reddit user spondgbob asked:
"If someone offered you $50,000 to buy your pet, how would you respond?"
Here's what Reddit has to say.
"I'd tell them to meet me outside the local PetSmart in an hour and then rush there and buy a hamster or something."
"Kind of my only option since I don't have a pet."
"You sir, are playing 3D chess while the rest of us are all playing checkers."
"Made me think for a second because my immediate answer is no but upon thinking about it, and how badly I need the money, the answer is still no."
"Irrational love is crazy."
"I could desperately use that money and there's nothing special about my cats. Took a moment to realize it's completely irrational but I could never part with these idiots."
"The harder question after this is at what price point, if any, would you do it?"
Everything Has A Price
"Everything has a price, and they’re in luck that the price for my blind, deaf, arthritic dog happens to be $50k"
"I mean $50k is $50k."
"Like I get that some people view pets as family, good for them. I don't, so as long as they weren't gonna torture the animal or something, then 100% would do it."
" 'You may have the one that runs from it's own poo after it sh*ts' "
"Had a cat get spooked while sh*tting... when it finished he managed to nuke 4 rooms :( "
"I call what my dog does a 'poop-about.' "
"Like a walk-about, but she is pooping as she waddles around the yard sniffing rocks and stuff. She's a weird critter and I love her more than anything."
"One of my earliest memory is having a blast farting in the bathtub... and then..."
"Don't make fun of your pet, your own poop can be very scary and we deserve love no less than more courageous creatures."
"Give it to them."
"I love my aquarium and fish in it. But I could build a sweet aquarium set up with $50k."
"Exactly! I wouldn't sell my dog but I'd give my aquariums away for 50k."
"One of them is a custom that a built a background for and I'd still give it away for 50k."
"Yeah, I would sell my cat in a heartbeat. Call me a narcissist I guess."
"Good thing I dont have kids."
"I'll take the $100,000 in cash."
"50k to give him to you and another 50k to take him back tomorrow when you've finally reached your limit and can't keep him anymore."
"My dog has his own spirit animal, and that spirit animal is a bag of dicks."
"My dog has separation anxiety and a powerful set of lungs."
"I have to drop him off at my mom's house on the way to work so he can be with someone familiar or else he'll be howling all day. He sounds like a dying bison."
"I'm talking loud enough to hear inside your house half a block away. While he's *inside* my house!"
"My kitty is old at this point and I worry now. Someone willing to pay $50k for her probably has the money to take care of medical needs that will be coming soon. That's money I dont have."
"I love her, she has been my family for 17 years now, but if she gets sick reality is I'm gonna have to get her put down probably. She'd have a better chance with someone rich to spoil her at the end."
"I'm shocked by everyone saying they'd do it?!"
"If someone is willing to pay that much, just imagine the sick sh*t they are planning on doing. No way I could live with myself."
"Would you sell your kid? You can get a lot more than 50k for one of them..."
"I have a hard time believing someone willing to sell a dog for a 'lot of money' wouldn't be tempted to or actually sell a child."
"It's alooooot of money for children, so if money is the motivator...."
"My a$$hole cat is a jerk, but family. Though I would expect a lot of push to sell him since he is mean to everyone with only rare moments of niceness."
"Plus they whoever got him would likely kill him."
"He is allergic to fish, can't wear a collar even a breakaway one (somehow almost strangled himself twice), sits in the middle of the road if he escapes, eats the random stuff on the ground, randomly attacks people (full on claws, teeth- goes for the veins usually breaks skin and causes a bruise), has diseases, and goes after other animals in the house regardless of size."
"I hate it and get mad at my boyfriend every time he says it, but he jokes that natural selection is trying its best with my cat. He's kind of right."
"He is untrainable and awful, but incredibly cute and everyone wants to pet him (but quickly learn not to go near him.) At least he does not attack kids 5 and under though."
"I wanted to name him lil Napoleon as he is perpetually ready for a battle and a short legged munchkin. I took him in from my sister but couldn't change his name so it became my nickname for him."
Get Over It
"It is a beta fish that we have had for six days. The kids are currently celebrating it still being alive because they accidentally killed our first fish in about six hours."
"Suffice to say, I’m pretty sure we can get them over it."
"Yes please on the $50,000."
Time to be honest with yourself—would you do it?
What would your reaction be?
Let's argue in the comments!
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Two years ago I steamed a hole in my belly with a hot water bottle that was slightly open.
I didn't feel myself literally cooking because I have nerve damage in the area, but I still have a quarter-sized circular scar as proof!
I've got lots of scars, but my lobster steam stamp is one of my newer additions so it's kind of a fan favorite right now.
Reddit user jeffcarpthefisheater asked:
"Hey, how did you get that scar?"
and Reddit was collectively like :
"Yes, I would like to tell the story of the time I maimed myself and/or was maimed, thanks for asking!"
It's story time, fam.
Sinus Strugglesfriends tv runny nose GIFGiphy
"They cut across the top of my head, ear to ear, peeled the top of my face down, carved out my frontal sinuses like a pumpkin lid, put me back together, and stapled me shut."
"Repeated sinus infections in the frontal sinuses. Hard to treat."
"My childhood cat gave me a diagonal scar across my chest when I was 5 or so."
"She had jumped from my lap and slipped a bit, the scratch was from her back paws. I was sad when it faded many years later."
"Hmm, I should check something ... brb ... Hey, my boob scar from my cat is still there!"
"That genuinely makes me happy since she passed away more than ten years ago."
"I've got another one from her on my inner elbow. Both are from the one single time I had to give her a bath because she was having an allergic reaction to a flea medication."
"She was Very Displeased with the situation."
Carrying A Torch
"My twin brother accidentally took a blowtorch across my forearm while cutting metal in metals class in high school."
"I was cutting some square tubing in shop class with a cutting torch."
"I cut it just fine ... and then immediately picked it up, burning a square into my palm."
Samurai Shenaniganssamurai GIFGiphy
"From a samurai sword."
"It was the first time I'd ever been around people my age drinking. A friend of mine took a fake swing at me; I grabbed the blade reflexively, he yanked it out of my hand."
"Cut pretty deep, hurt like a b*tch."
"But how many people today have scars caused by samurai swords?"
"I also have a samurai sword scar!!"
"Mines on my right knuckle as the hand guards did not do anything for guarding my inexperienced hands. Nearly completely severed the tendon."
"I was sober and in high school."
"Got severely burned by a wild berry pop tart."
"I was very young maybe 7-8. I was sitting on the counter and when I pulled the pop tart out of the toaster, the frosting was so hot it was bubbling."
"I dropped it out of reflex and it landed frosting side down on my leg. I remember brushing it off and my skin melted off with it."
"I had to go to the emergency room."
"Now 15 years later and I still have the scars on my leg, no hair grows where it was burned."
"No one told me poptarts could turn hostile. I was so young and naive, innocent to the world and the horrors it possesses."
"Wild berry pop tart showed me pain, showed me torture, scarred me for life. I shall never forget, and I shall never forgive."
"That's why I stick to domesticated Pop-Tarts."
The Foam PitFlying Major Air GIF by Nitro CircusGiphy
"My legs are all kinds of f*cked up."
"I lost track of which scars came from where, but the ones on my right leg are the gnarliest and those I definitely remember."
"A couple of years ago a friend of mine took me to an indoor bike park. Ramps and jumps and a pump track. It was a lot of fun."
"Well he talked me into going off of this big jump into a foam pit; the kind where you can practice tricks without getting hurt. Well.....I got hurt."
"I landed in the foam pit. It's just that the bike landed there first and I landed directly on top of the bike. Despite the foam padding I ripped my leg to shreds on the pedals."
"Blood everywhere. Thankfully no stitches."
"I'm glad my girlfriend at the time was a nurse."
A Cyst On My Spine
"Back surgery to remove a bone cyst on my spine."
"It was squeezing my spinal cord and I could barely walk. That resulted in two surgeries, about a 10" scar down my back, another long one under my armpit (part of the work meant collapsing my lung so they could get to stuff), and a small one on my hip that a bone graft came from."
"My surgeon was great. He rebuilt 2 vertebrae from the grafts, bolted everything together, and I wore a full torso brace for half a year."
"At my last checkup, he said he didn't want to see me again, which I was happy to oblige."
Power Ranger Practice
"It was the summer of 1994..."
"I was a Power Ranger practicing some killer ninja moves on the bed in my grandparents' guest bedroom. My head smashed into the ceiling light fixture and one of the shards got me in the leg and sliced it open."
Pizza Rolls And Harry PotterSeason 6 Reaction GIF by FriendsGiphy
"Drunkenly decided a French knife was the proper tool for opening Pizza Rolls. It wasn't."
"So I stop with the pizza rolls and grip my finger, now dripping with blood, all the way to the bathroom. I patched it up in the bathroom and went to go lie down on the couch. Except I never made it."
"Woke up on the floor to my roommates shaking me awake, saying that they 'heard a sound and called out, but got concerned' when I didn't answer them."
"I had turned the corner into the living room too quickly in my stupor and smashed my forehead into the 90⁰ angle of my doorframe. Knocked myself out."
"I cosplay Harry Potter every day now. And yeah, the finger scarred, too."
"Drunken munchies made me fight my house and my house won. Two scars, one bad decision."
You're up, folks. Tell us how you got that scar.
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Have you ever heard of a certain job that people call a career and thought... "PEOPLE PAY YOU FOR THAT?!?!"
All hard, honest work is good work.
And then there is just trash work.
And I don't mean garbage collection, that is honest work.
I don't know how some people live with themselves.
Redditor MrTuxedo1 wanted to discuss the careers they don't believe people should chase. They asked:
"What job do you have no respect for?"
Ticket scalpers. How do you the audacity to say that's a job?
Actual burglars have more empathy.
DisrespectfulOut Of Office Summer GIF by Merge MansionGiphy
"There are debt collectors who call relatives of the deceased to pay off their debts when they are not legally obligated to."
"Australian Real Estate Agents. Laws don't seem to apply to them. Just as dodgy in sales and rentals alike. Never seen anything like it overseas."
"I'm in the US, it can vary state by state but my state is pretty strict on realtor laws. Some states require attorney review and there are definitely penalties for being reported for shady sh*t. It does require consumer reporting though."
"Where I live, tax info was leaked and now scammers are targeting low income individuals/families (people earning under 30,000 per year) with etransfer scams. I got one the other day that was an etransfer warning that 240$ 'a family member sent me' was about to expire."
"That’s disgusting. The scammers know what they’re doing, they know the harm they cause people and yet they don’t care."
Should be illegal...
"MLM managers. Not the low level idiots that get suckered into it, they suck too for trying to bring new people into that sh*tshow, but the people who create them know exactly what they are doing and are pretty much the only ones who profit off of it. Should be illegal. Pyramid schemes are illegal. None of them ever get the just desserts except occasionally by vigilantes I assume."
I hate debt collectors. Yeah, you calling me one hundred times a week is going to miraculously make money appear.
"I met Jack Gleeson (King Joffrey from Game of Thrones) at a bus stop in Dublin. Really nice guy but he said he quit acting due to people being nasty online and constant hounding from paparrazi. He's happier now but it sucks that he was pushed away from a career he was quite good at."
"The pastors at mega churches whom ask their followers for money for private jets. Absolute scum to abuse others faith for your own greed."
"Brian Tamaki is a greedy freaking pig, he takes advantage of so many people who are already struggling. Every time he’s in the local news (which btw is often) I get more and more pissed off at him and his wife. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brian_Tamaki "
it’s a thing???
“'Dating Expert.' Sadly it’s a thing. It’s basically a self appointed title that requires no training or qualifications. What’s worse, is that I have a female friend who uses one. It’s very much a blind leading the blind situation."
"Most of the self proclaimed “dating coaches” I know are women in their late 30s or early 40s who have never been married or had a longer relationship."
"Poachers. Especially big game poachers who purposefully hunt nearly extinct animals from species they know they are on the brink."
"I know there are poachers that come from rural villages who are trying to just put food on the table, which has my sympathy but poachers who come from money and hunt down animals minding their business in most shelters or restricted areas just to put a head on their wall as a trophy are absolutely heinous."
I See It Allmiss cleo fraud GIFGiphy
"Psychic Mediums. Specifically those who prey on the grieving."
"I've always found it interesting how many magicians go after people like this. I think it's because they know what it takes to trick people for the art. The slight of hand and mentalism. And they abhor people who use these tactics for such sh*tty purposes."
I want so bad to believe in psychics and mediums. What say we on that topic?
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The nose is constantly being attacked by odors of the world.
Going through one day without having to hold my breath during a certain point, is a miracle.
Of course, I'm a New Yorker, so I maybe exaggerating for people in the countryside.
What's funnier is odors that are pleasant, that shouldn't be.
Have you ever looked and something and thought... "yuck."
But then you smelled it and it was like... "oh lovely,"
Redditor HappQueue wanted to know what aromas are arousing to the senses that may come as a surprise to many. They asked:
"What smells good but shouldn't?"
For some odd reason I love the things burning. Anything, food, pots, pans. You name it. Weird.
Blowfire burning GIFGiphy
"Matches/candles on a birthday cake. I remember lighting matches as a kid purely to blow them out and inhale that sweet match-y smell."
"I work at a Chemical plant. We make a highly acidic product that is dark blue, viscus, highly corrosive, and smells exactly like Fruit Loops. It is incredibly disturbing."
"Organic chemistry has many 'guilty good' smells. Thiophosgene (sulfur derivative of a chemical weapon used extensively in WW1) apparently smells like meat. Phosgene is used to make polycarbonate, thiophosgene is used to make some sulfur-containing molecules which eventually end up in therapeutic drugs."
I can't huff it...
"Paint, specifically house paint. I love the smell. But anytime I hear that anyone is painting a room or their house, I volunteer. I just love sitting on the floor in a room that's been freshly painted, closing my eyes and just inhaling that slightly chemically, slightly creamy aroma."
A Hint of French...
"A fish and chips shop burnt down as couple blocks from work a few years ago. The whole neighborhood smelled amazing for days. Just the slight hint of French fries. Nothing overpowering. It was so awesome. Until I found out someone was trapped in the fire and died."
DragDrag Racing Vegas GIF by Don Schumacher RacingGiphy
"Race fuel. Instantly puts me in a good mood as it reminds me of going to the drag races with my dad when I was young."
Fuel and matches get me too. And they sort of go together. Interesting.
Just like the Movie...Johnny Depp Drinking GIFGiphy
"The water from the Pirates of the Caribbean ride. Mmm, bromine."
"This is one of my favorite scents of all time, and Disney is very aware that people enjoy it. Evidently it’s a lot harder to recreate than just adding bromine to water."
"There's a chicken wing restaurant near my house that has a challenge sauce called "black widow." The owner claims it to be around 500,000 scovilles. A few years back some buddies and I decided to try them, the sauce was a dark molasses color and smelled almost like a BBQ sauce, no hint of the danger that lurked at all. We each grabbed one wing and it went terribly. I don't know how something so spicy could smell so innocent."
"Hotel/rented rooms whenever you go on vacation. There's this particular smell that just says 'you are on vacation,' especially on a beach/swimming trips/out-of-the-town vacays."
"Bath and Body Works has a plug-in scent called Endless Weekend that replicates that scent (to my humble nose)."
"Someone you are attracted to's body odors. Anyone else who is slightly unhygienic smells repulsive."
"I remember back in high school a girl leaned over, sniffed me, told me that I smelled really good, and asked me what cologne I was wearing. I asked if she was joking, and she's like, no, you smell really good. When I told her I had just gotten done with gym class, she gets a small 'oh no...' look on her face and turns away. I think we both had a revelation that day."
That SmellSmell It Season 6 GIF by This Is UsGiphy
"The smell inflatable things give off. I have no idea how to describe it, but it’s… nostalgic? to me."
I do love the smell of plastics and inflatables. Ahh....
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