"What are some very irrational fears that you have and if you told anyone they would say, 'Wow, that's weird.'?" –– Oh, we're going to go down this rabbit hole, are we?
Okay, fair enough.
You can thank Redditor VeryChunkyChili for that, by the way. Let's get this going, shall we? In the meantime, I'd advise this individual to steer clear of their nearest Wendy's.
"Im scared..."
I'm scared that a bug is going to crawl into my hairdryer, and when I go to turn it on, it's going to shoot the bug into my hair.
"That some toys..."
GiphyThat some toys in my room would "poison" any drink I left unattended, to turn me into a toy.
Obviously nonsense, but I still don't leave drinks in there unattended.
"I am convinced..."
I am convinced that, one day, I will find a dead body so I am consequentially always looking for one.
"The enemies..."
Remember Animorphs? The enemies in that series were slug people that crawled in your ear at night and took over your body, but you are still conscious in your head and can experience everything they are doing. So for like 5 years I slept in my bed and covered my ears with my blanket.
"I have this weird fear..."
I have this weird fear that every time I go to clear out my body of waste, you know what I mean, I worry that I'm actually asleep and in reality am at work or in public just dumping my load in front of people. So every time I sit down on the toilet I have to pinch myself to ensure I'm awake and conscious. It's definitely the weirdest habit I have and I have no idea where it stems from.
"9 times out of 10..."
I have a phobia of balloons. 9 times outta 10 when I tell people this they find a balloon and squeeze it and pop it right in front of me, to see if I actually have a phobia.
"I'm afraid of..."
Going to the bathroom with the shower curtain closed. I'm afraid of someone or something hiding behind the curtain and waiting to attack me while I'm vulnerable on the toilet.
"Every time..."
Every time I drive over a large overpass I get a moment where I fear it will collapse.
"I wouldn't call it a fear..."
i wouldn't call it a fear, but flour makes me really cringe. if i'm watching a cooking show and people are touching flour or rubbing it on the table i have to shut my eyes. if i was making bread or something, i'll touch it, but i'll hate every second of it.
"I don't like to walk..."
Landmines. I don't like to walk through random yards or field because landmines are scary.
There has NOT been a war in my area for about a hundred and fifty years.
Redditor AMGBOI69420 wanted to discuss all the best ways to ruin the moment, so they asked:
"What’s the worst thing you can say right after having sex?"
The worst I have ever said to someone is, "Morning. Sorry, I forgot your name."
Oh BOO!!
Friends Tv GIFGiphy"My ex-husband was a virgin when we met. After his first time, he said, 'I don't know why people seem to enjoy that so much.'"
"THANKS, BOO."
StrangersWithAndi
Wow Really?!
"True story..."
"My partner and I of 8 years lost our virginities to each other. He grew up in a very sex-sheltered home and I grew up in a sex-positive one. We waited until our second-year anniversary, as we wanted to make sure he was ready before we started."
"We had sex and I thought it was great, but he gets up and puts his underwear back on, muttering."
"'That wasn't worth it.'"
"God d**n it hurt, but he was referring to the anxiety he had over sex, not the sex itself. We laugh about it now."
Eas_Mackenzie
I Tried
"I think I'll go back to being gay."
AlertWar2945
"Reminds me of an episode of King of the Hill where Hank finds out Peggy lost her virginity to her friend to see if he was really gay."
"I just remember Peggy talking about how unsure he was about it but after doing the deed with her how extremely sure he was that he was gay."
No-Significance2113
Check
"Now let’s go over your performance review."
repwin1
"You joke but I had a guy send me a Google form after sex so I could give him feedback on how he did."
single-left-sock
"Honestly though that would be hilarious. Like after you're done you reach under the bed and pull out a clipboard with a bunch of things in a checklist and a review section, then sign and stamp it and give it to them."
yamanamawa
shocked wig GIFI wish I could say I believe that no person could say these things, but... I know people.
Why cheat? Why?
No Touching
"From a former FWB who never cuddled after sex and when I asked him once he said he had to leave to 'defrost some hot dogs for a party tomorrow' …a party that I wasn’t even invited to."
FishyBricky
"I mean, if he communicated with you that he did not want to cuddle and did not want anything deeper than just sex, I don't see why you'd be upset. It's really important to communicate each other's intentions before doing it."
DrizzlyEarth175
"To be fair, cuddling after sex releases oxytocin, which can increase bonding in ‘couples.’ FWB was probably scared of catching feelings."
"F**king hot dogs though!? 😆 that’s funny (now)."
ScumBunny
Keep it in the Family
"Pretty good but your mom was better."
tempestae
"I have said this. Or close. Got into a relationship with a girl whose mum, ten years previously I had hooked up with orally. She knew and thought it was funny. In fact one Xmas she was doing Xmas Dinner. Said 'Dan, mum will be here in an hour... help me in the kitchen. I'm not leaving you two in a room together.'"
rumbunkshus
Introductions
Big Brother What GIF by Big Brother After DarkGiphy"What's your name again?"
Leocut78
"I had a girl ask me what HER name was right before. I had no idea. She didn’t leave (or tell me her name)."
PredictBaseballBot
I’ll never forget...
"Not sure if it’s the worst but I know it hurt. I was dating this guy is hs, a varsity jock, and really cute. I could’ve sworn he had women, anyways we start dating. The first time we hooked up it sucked so bad, I looked him dead in the eye and asked him if he was a virgin. I swear the look on his face is something I’ll never forget."
AuraRiver
Well that is a whole lot of therapy bills.
I get that sometimes words just fall out of our mouths, but Lord show a little decorum.
