Watching a stoner in action is pretty funny from an outside point of view. But what is it like on the inside? Can you even trace a thought process? On this episode of "Knowable Investigates," we will be going inside the minds of those who have experienced the effects of THC in a crazy way.
u/A-MATIC asked:
What is the highest thing you have ever done while high?
Here were some of the answers.
The Entire Cow
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Went downstairs to pour a glass of milk for myself. My parents happen to be in the kitchen. So in my best sober impression I pour a glass quickly and leave. Halfway up the stairs I realize I took the gallon and not the glass. At that point I had to commit.
This Show Is So Good
I was on skype with my best friend and as she was talking to me I just sat there watching her because I thought I was watching Netflix.
This is my favorite response in this thread, I've been in that position before. Just totally zoned, not really taking in the information, just kinda observing until the other person stops talking and your brain realizes this isn't one sided.
Taste Test
Smoked a bong after getting my tonsils out when I was told not to. Thought I couldn't taste the old vanilla ice cream I was eating and that I had fried my tastebuds because I smoked too soon after the surgery, this made sense at the time. My dad walked in the kitchen as I was pouring the salt shaker in my mouth to see if I could taste at all.
Caketastrophe
My cousin and I got stoned on his roof late at night and his brother couldn't know we smoked. So once the munchies kicked in we went to his kitchen to get some chocolate biscuit cake. My cousin pulled out two tiny *ss plates and 2 forks. He then proceeded to slam the fork into the cake, I said why don't you use a knife but then he just smiled and ripped off the most perfect piece of cake I've ever seen.
Then he spotted his brother and ran into his room and left me in the kitchen. I was going to run too but I hadn't got my piece of cake yet. His brother walked into the kitchen and said "ooo chocolate biscuit cake!" And I was under so much pressure to act normal that I didn't know what to do. So I slammed my fork into the cake and smiled and proceeded to rip the cake in half. He freaked out and said why didn't you use a knife and then the uncontrollable laughter kicked in. I said I didn't know where the knives were, to which he replied, where did you get the fork? So I pointed at a random drawer which he opened and had only knives in it. I couldn't control my laughter anymore so I ran away with my giant piece of cake falling off my tiny plate. I don't think he knew I was high. Probably.
Something By Puccini
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One time I was in college and I was stoned and my brother was cooking bacon for our munchies.
I kept telling everyone to shut up because in the back of my mind I heard little tiny soft beautiful music. Kind of like a symphony. I was like I'm so high.
It was the bacon sizzling. The bacon sizzling sounded like a freaking symphony to me.
What Actually Happens Here
I have a "tripping in the grocery store" story myself. My (now husband) and I went to get some snacks to tuck into a movie for the duration of our trip. I get pretty zoned out staring at the snacks....there were so many options. I started to wonder if normal people stare at the snacks for this long. I noticed my mouth was open while I was staring. I still can't make ANY decisions. All of a sudden there's a cacophony behind me that shakes me to my core. I turn around to look and knock over a display of cheeseballs, already making a scene. Then, I look towards the sound; there's a high school marching band in full uniform in the frozen food section. The shock and absurdity of it all had me laughing like the insane high person I was. The mask fell.
Panic Plus High Equals:
At this point in my life I had agoraphobia, and while high, mustered up the courage to go grocery shopping for what was probably the fourth time in my life. Great idea.
I'm so stoned that I decide to try the deli counter for the first time ever, and I see this little container on the counter. I start to panic, and scramble to find a tip for what my high mind decided was a tip jar.
I get my order, smile at the deli person, and make eye contact with her as I go to put $2 in the jar. But it isn't a tip jar. It's a trash can for the tickets. And we're still making eye contact. And I slowly die as I have to commit to my mistake, and stuff my money into the trash can.
It took me four years to go to a deli counter again.
The Chicken Was Never To Be
Not me but a friend. We have a popular chicken finger shop called Raising Canes in our college town. Now those of you familiar with canes know that they only serve one thing, chicken fingers.
All you can decide other than that is how many you want and whether you want fries, coleslaw, toast and sauce. My roommate, high as hell, sat in the parking lot for a solid 20 minutes deciding just how many chicken fingers he wanted. When he finally came to his conclusion, he proceeded to pull into the drive through, only to realize the store had been closed before he even pulled into the parking lot to start his decision-making process.
Whoops!
I worked at subway when I was in high school. My friends and I thought it would be awesome to get high before work. It was my first few times getting high and once I got to work I was out of this world. I was taking someone's order and they wanted their sandwich toasted. I put the sandwich on the pan, turned around to place it in the toaster, and then dropped it on the floor. I couldn't stop laughing and I'm pretty sure that person wanted to punch me in the face.
The First And The Best
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First time I ever smoked. Just chilling in my friends room at about 11pm, sleeping over. We're just watching tv, and all of a sudden everything is just pitch black. Me being high and not really knowing how to act, I figure, "Ok, it must be time for bed then."
Only it's so dark I can't see anything so I just kind of fumble around in the dark for a while until i eventually feel a door knob in front of me. I turn it. Locked. For some reason, no matter how many times I turned this locked door knob, it just wouldn't open. Maybe it was because it was locked, but who knows. /s
Eventually I hear a light tapping on the door. I tap back.
*tap tap tap
*tap tap tap
This continued for like five minutes, just me tapping in response to some random tapping on the other side of this door. I'm still standing in pitch black, no clue where I am, what the tapping is, or how to open this door.
EVENTUALLY, I figure out how to unlock the door and open it up. My friend, his sister, and her friend are just standing in the hall. I was in the bathroom the whole time, and had no idea. Apparently, at around 11, I went to go to the bathroom, walked in, locked the door, and just stood there. Never turned on the lights, never actually went to the bathroom, never even moved my feet from the same spot for about FORTY FIVE MINUTES. FORTY. FIVE. MINUTES. After about 30 minutes my friend got worried about me and started knocking on the door and asking if I was okay, but wasn't sure what it meant when I just knocked back from the other side.
Over a year later, they still haven't let me live it down. Just one of the memorable stories I have from that night, my first time was by far the best time i've ever smoked. Wish I could go back.
Let's talk about toxic femininity, shall we? VysX_ asked:
There's toxic masculinity but what are examples of toxic femininity?
For some reason, toxic femininity gets really, REALLY prevalent when they become moms. It’s weird and kinda creepy, if you ask me.
Why does Little League bring out the worst in people?
“Mothers who treat other people like crap and then justify it by saying they're a mama bear."
“A few years ago my son's team was playing a little league game against another team. We had a very good team that year and the other team was really struggling. Despite this, it was a close game going into the 5th (i.e. next-to-last) inning.
Well, we're batting and the wheels finally come off for the opposition. A kid on our team gets a simple hit to the outfield and the other team proceeds to go full tee-ball and throw it all over creation. What should have been a single turns into a 3-run HR.
As the batter crosses home plate, fans are going nuts, players are going nuts, everyone is going nuts, and the star player on the losing team just melts down. He picks up the ball and throws it as hard as he can right at our dug out. There's a safety fence of course, so no one gets hurt, but it was still very much an "Oh, snap" moment for everyone.
At this point, the ump turns to the losing coach and says, "Coach, you need to get a hold of your player." That's it. That's all he said. He didn't say anything to the player; he didn't kick him out of the game; he just gave the coach a direct warning.
Next thing I hear is "DONT YOU TALK TO MY BABY THAT WAY" as the dug-out mom comes firing out of the other dug-out, heading straight for the ump. Fortunately for everyone, the head coach comes out of nowhere to intercept her. He proceeds to restrain her and walk her (and the player) away. The whole game stops for ~5 minutes while those three basically have a group hug in the middle of the infield.
Fortunately, that was the end of the drama. I still give major props to that other coach for somehow diffusing that situation without getting the police involved. But I will never understand what was going through that lady's mind."
We can all do “womaning” differently.
Wendy Conrad GIF by Your Happy WorkplaceGiphy“To me it would mean women who bag on other women for womaning differently than they do.
This becomes really toxic after childbirth. Some women will feel nothing about letting you know how you are parenting wrong by using this product or letting you child do this particular thing.
Women who are able to stay at home will be made to feel guilty for not helping to provide; and women who work are made to feel guilty for abandoning their child.
I wish women were more understanding about dealing with differences and letting things slide a bit more. You should never feel higher after putting someone else down.
That being said, I don't know how we did it, but I found the world's greatest group of moms when my son was a year and a half old. We came from all walks of life and supported the ever-loving hell out of each other. This was in Phoenix late 90's and we were completely tight until I moved away when my son was 5. I miss all of em."
They should know better than to tear down other women.
“It's very common for mothers or female relatives to be some of the first ones to comment on a woman's weight, appearance, or personal style/fashion choices, as well as reinforcing a sense of self-hatred (i.e. "I look so fat in this outfit, and you look so ugly in that color"), all while tearing other women down ("I can't believe she's wearing that, doesn't she know how she looks??").
When you have that reinforcement that it's normal to say things like that, because if your mom does it then it's okay to do it too, then you just treat it as normal. And because it's so common, you find other women to do it with and it just becomes a cycle. If you try to break it, then you're labeled as sensitive, a bore, and "Oh my god we're just having fun, chill out, it's not that serious."
I still remember the first time I called my mom on talking sh*t about a woman wearing something she didn't like, and she got so f*cking mad at me."
Let’s dive into the tearing down other women thing some more. We as a society need a wake-up call.
It’s like high school all over again.
"Some women are so judgemental about other women, particularly when it comes to looks or fashion.
Also the women who seem to enjoy forming cliques and cutting out anyone they deem to be an outsider.
Worked with an office full of them once. It really sucked!"
“When I first got out of grad school, my first (and as it turns out, only) teaching job was long-term substituting for a friend while she went on maternity leave. The kids/classroom were mine for the first half of the school year, but we coordinated so that things would be pretty smooth transitioning back to my friend teaching at the end of her leave.
My friend was part of a two-teacher team who ran the 8th grade Student Council. I told the other teacher that I would be happy to help her with the club in my friend's absence, but she insisted she didn't need my help. She then proceeded to 100% ignore me and treat me as if I was invisible during all future interactions. 8th-grade team meetings, if I said even a single word, she shot me side eye, even though what I had said was not at all related to her; just a kind of "you're not a real teacher, how dare you speak?" vibe she was giving off.
My last day, my friend came in after school to put her classroom stuff up as I took my own down. The other teacher and two other women (the PE coach who I'd never talked to and another teacher, I don't remember) came in to help her, but none of the three of them offered to help me take any of my own things down or pack any of it up. They also said things like, "Is this yours or hers?" to my friend, even though I was standing right f*cking there. They also gushed about how excited they were that she was back; again, right in front of me.
After I was finally done putting away all my things--again, by myself--I just left without a word. I texted my friend about it later, and she apologized for her other friends' behavior but just excused it as, "Yeah, they're definitely the 'Mean Girls' types".
I was just floored. These were TEACHERS. You know, the people who are supposed to teach children NOT to bully other people? And I had never been anything but nice to everyone I met during my time there, but they didn't care. I wasn't part of their group, so I wasn't worth their time.
It became one of a laundry list of reasons I decided I didn't actually want to be a teacher for a living, after all.
tl;dr - personally experienced cliquey adult women in the education field, of all places. It sucked.”
How possessive.
“My ex-husband and I separated when our child was 2. Went to a birthday party for daughter's friend and was having a casual conversation with one of the husbands. The group of women stood in a corner staring at me, and the wife came up and grabbed him by the arm and started doing that strange possessive peacock dance.
What were we talking about? Real estate prices."
“No joke, I had a professor I was close with because we were both single moms and she gave me the advice to wear a wedding band even without a man and that the other moms would chill out a bit. It worked and my daughter started getting more opportunities for playdates. It's really demoralizing."
I think we all need to learn how to be more forgiving.
Toxic office culture is the literal worst.
come together love and hip hop GIF by VH1Giphy“The sheer terrifying glee they have at tearing down someone who's made a mistake or is somehow lacking in their eyes. I worked at a doctor's office with a fifty person staff, forty five of which were women. Like they were so fake and catty and just outright hateful to each other. It was a toxic office culture."
“Did they also have a compulsive, competitive need to please the male figures in the department? I go weekly to a fairly small medical department where the head doctor is male and the majority of nurses and admin are female. They treat him like an absolute God and defer to him with everything. He's a huge d*ck and of course, has a big ego by now."
This girl isn't just toxic--she's a monster.
“A girl in the grade below me (I'm a senior in high school at this point) passed away unexpectedly due to sepsis. Our whole city was in shock as the girl was in the school just days before her passing.
I remember I met up with my gf at the time and she asked, "Why do so many people care about her dying? It's not like she was pretty anyways."
This was the type of girl that says, "What??!! I am SOOO nice."
Safe to say, the lord blessed me with a brain and I GTFO of that relationship.
To this day, she is still in contact with me & recently she complained that guys use her & she can't figure out why nobody will be with her.
Well, honey, I don't think it takes a rocket scientist to figure that one out.
Edit: Some of you have said that I should tell her and I did. Apparently, she would "literally never say that about her" and also apparently "I know nothing about her." (My ex. Dated for 4 years. Know nothing)"
This is how eating disorders start.
“Probably the culture around eating.
When I was 17-18, a few friends kept saying how much more attractive I'd be if I lost weight, how that's why most guys weren't into me, how I'd regret not being skinny in college, etc. My BMI was slightly under 25, so I wasn't overweight, but I was close to it, especially compared to them.
So I basically became anorexic from 18-20 just because the feedback was like a high. I recovered, but not enough to make my mom and others happy, even though my BMI was 22-23. This continued for years between friends and family, and it was exhausting cycling between being too skinny or not average enough.
That's really the only strong example I can think of. No matter the trendy body shape, the criticism from others will always continue. I've only had one guy ever comment on my weight compared to the many, many women, even strangers.”
As a woman myself, I’ve encountered plenty of toxic femininity in my life. It’s almost as terrible as the objectifying sh*t I hear men saying about women all the time. We have to be rid of cattiness and tearing other women down.
Remember what we actually need to be working against. So much sexism exists in the world, and we have to stick together.