Son Meets Disappointing Bio-Dad For The First Time, Asks Internet For Advice About Meeting The Rest Of The Family
It takes a lot of work to go and find your biological parents when you're adopted, and how disappointing it can be if you find out they aren't who you think they are.
u/MuNaMunaHuman told his story:
I [14M] met my father for the first time yesterday. I'm really disappointed and I don't know if I want to met the rest of them anymore.
I just got home and I had a day to think it over, I dunno anymore. I really did not enjoy meeting my dad, Zack, and I am just not sure anymore.
Zack is really immature for a 39 year old. He told me he likes to go to night clubs, bars, talk to young girls, etc, he's a frat boy that never grew up. He's just not what I was expecting. He told me that he could give me pointers on how to get 5 girls in 1 night. He comes off as such a douche. He's so in your face and loud. I don't know if I want to meet the rest of the family.
TL;DR: I don't know if I want to meet the rest of the family.
Here was some of the advice he got.
Can I just say I absolutely adore this response? Congrats for being a sensible person.
You are under no obligation at all to see anyone in this ruckus, but who are the rest of the family members you would be meeting?
Regardless, if you do not want to meet them, for whatever reason, just say you are not ready to reintroduce 'family' to your life. Family are the people who you choose as you family - you don't earn being family by blood. You owe nothing to these people, regardless if they share blood with you or not.
By all means, don't if that's what you want.
I met my dad at 16, now 28. First meeting was okay. Met his mom, sister, and my niece and nephew not long after. Overall okay people that love each other. I spent a weekend with him for my birthday and it was a little awkward. I was being shy and wasn't ready to really open up to him.
I was suppose to fly out state to meet the rest of my family...it never happened. He completely cut off all contact. I wrote him a letter expressing my feelings, had a phone conversation with him after that. The gist of that convo was him telling me that he didn't think I cared (because of my shyness towards him). I started bawling, my mom got pissed and started yelling at him. It was bad.
There's more to it. We tried a few other times over true years to connect. But meh. The last time I saw him, his lovely mother was telling me that she doesn't blame my mom for me not being around.... puh-fucking-lease. They wanted nothing to do with me then as an innocent baby, and not now as a grown as woman.
Good thing is that I met my half brother...not through him, naturally. He told me about him at 16, I never forgot. At that time, he was telling me how he told my brother about me, and they were trying to find a gift to get me. I eventually found my brother on Facebook at 23. Turns out our dad lied to me, my brother never even knew I existed. His mom, which is a really awesome woman, let him know that it was true, she just never knew how to tell him.
Well, I ended up moving out of state to get to know my brother for half a year. He's awesome, his family is awesome and welcomed me with open arms, and I am so glad that I got him out of this ridiculous shit factory of a situation.
Oh, yeah, my own dad blocked me on Facebook after we agreed to meet and have a drink together. His lovely mother also makes no effort to be a part of my life either.
This was a learning experience.
If I were you, learn your heritage from him and get any medical history. Phone numbers, addresses, meet your family. The only reason why is because if some health issue happens to you or any children you have in the future, you can try to contact them if absolutely necessary. Other than that, go your separate ways if that's what you are feeling.
Lol was not trying to write a wall of text.
So, I'm 31. I met my dad when I was 13. I have been nothing but increasingly disappointed by my father's, well, everything since that time. I'm pretty sure he's a sociopath trying to fit in with the rest of the world. He treats my half siblings orders of magnitude better than he treats me. I cannot express to anyone how much I wish I could go back and tell 13 year old me not to meet him. I know all of his family, they're not that much different than he is, and they kinda explain him. All of my favorite people from that side of the family are in-laws and weren't raised in those environments.
I will say this, how: I got to meet my dad's dad, with whom my father spent very little of his childhood. He's passed away now, but the 13-14 years in which I knew him were some really good ones. I consider him to be the silver lining to the shit-cloud that is my family.
So, what would I do now that I know what I know? I would dive in, find the people worth their salt, continually have them in my life, and exclude those who aren't. I would be crystal clear to all people where they stand and why.
God, your dad sounds like my mom. I met her when I was fifteen, and she bought me thongs and cigarettes.
I got an amazing half-sister (though I never call her that) out of the meeting, and that was about it.
Few things, he has no clue how to be a parent because while a sperm donor he isn't a parent. Your reaction already at 14 makes you more mature than this guy, who is my age age by a few years and the rest of us cringe at this sad display of a 'man'.
I think you had a mental picture of what your dad would be and god he did not even get close to it. You were not wrong for this, it's natural and he is WAY immature for his age anyway.
The five girls in one night comment shows his lack of respect for people and I think that's part of the disgust! (Your mom did a good job you are mature and can spot a loser, lots of women can't do that :p)
You do not owe this man or his family anything. Have you talked to your mom about this? If he calls I'd tell him I was busy when he tries for future meet ups. The good news (?) is he flaked for 14 years so I doubt he would consistently keep trying, especially if you were the one originally reaching out for the meet up.
As a person who met my bio dad at 36, I understand. He was not someone I wanted to invite to my home or meet the rest of my family, but I did meet my 1/2 sister out of it. She is amazing! Neither of us has a strong relationship with him, I only talk to him maybe twice a year, she sees him and talks to him more than that. But without him I would not have my incredible sister who I can not imagine living without now. Do what makes you comfortable and don't feel pressure to have a relationship with anybody. If you feel adventurous, meet some more of his side of people and maybe meet a cool person that you might have a great relationship with. Remember you don't have to, if you don't want to.
It sounds like you're a bit more mature than the average 14 y/o and he doesn't know how to interact with teenagers at all.
I met my biological father when I was 16. I was super gung-ho because my mother had died a few years before and I was craving/needing a parent in my life. It wasn't bad, he had cleaned up his life and was a decent human, but he never filled the void either.
We took things way too fast and the first time I met him in person I also met his wife and 25 of my aunts, uncles, and cousins. It's a loving family but that was super overwhelming.
It's okay if this guy doesn't feel like 'Dad' to you and it's absolutely okay to not seek that sort of relationship with him. Don't try to force him into that position either because it just leads to frustration. It's best to take it slow. It's okay to say 'I'm not ready yet.' You don't have to meet his family alone. If your Mom can't go with you (when you feel ready, of course) see if another family member you like will go with you. Any decent human being would understand you needing that sort of safety net.
My biological father died last year, 14 years after I met him. At best we were acquaintances that talked on holidays. I don't regret having tracked him down. We found some common ground over the years and a couple instances of 'the apple didn't fall far from the tree.' I feel fulfilled in the sense that I know where I came from but still occasionally grieve what never was.
You've got time to navigate this. You can even take a break, try again later and reassess.
I had exactly the same experience when I met my Dad. It was such a disappointment. He also told me that he didn't see me as a child as he felt I should have made more of an effort... As small children often go out out of their way to book appointments with their father. He is a drunken, stoner loser who has never grown up.
I met up with him a few more times over the years, but decided it wasn't for me. I am almost 30 and haven't seen my father in over ten years now and I don't regret it. I know it's tough having your hopes shattered, but if he was a decent dad you wouldn't be meeting him for the first time at 14. You are under no obligation to meet him again, and if you change your mind you now know where he is.
Unfortunately this is so common (boys building up ideas of what their real father's are like and then being dissapointed) it's a common trope in media now. Fresh prince of bel air had an episode that was really emotional. Basically, there's a reason he wasn't in your life until now. Good men, no matter the circumstances would have made an effort to be in your life. Relationship with your mother non withstanding.
My mother is/was an abusive narcissist. My father left when I was 12. I don't blame him, not even a little bit. What I knew of her then was enough to say that, and that was thru a child's eyes who didn't have full understanding of the situation. It was still enough but I'm sure there was more.
I later found out a lot of what she had told me about him had been a lie. I had been lied to and brainwashed and turned against him. I contacted him. He was so happy he cried. He answered all my questions, and wanted to know all about who I had grown up to be. I was 24 at the time.
We went to dinner the next week and it was a little awkward but very nice.
Sadly, this has no happy ending.
He remarried and my stepmother did everything she could to push me away, convinced for no reason that I didn't like her. She was in the hospital once and I asked my dad to ask her if I could visit. He relayed that she said she didn't want people seeing her sick. I said I understood, because I did, and to let her know if she changed her mind and felt up to it, I would still love to see her.
Well, than I "didn't like her" because I didn't come visit anyway. After she had asked me not to.
They lived about a half hr away from me. They would mention they had been in town, and when I said "Hey, why don't you call, we could grab an ice cream or something" he said "Well we don't want to bother you, you're so busy with school." I would say "I'm busy now, but could we meet up Thur?" if I were busy when they called.
When I graduated, they came, took 1 picture, said "Well, you probably want to go be with your friends...." and left. My friends were all going to lunch. With THEIR families.
I tried talking to my Dad about how I felt I didn't matter and how I felt he didn't want to even try to develop our relationship. He said nothing. We were on the phone and I had to ask if he was still there.
It never got resolved. No acknowledgement I had spoken even happened. We plodded along for a couple more months until there was another incident where I wasn't even thought about. My step brother's bday. I didn't even get an invite because it was "just a small thing for family".
So I wasn't even a cousin anymore. I was his god damned child and I wasn't family.
I lost it that time. I screamed at him. That while I understood why he left, and didn't resent him for it, neither had heever made ONE overture to get in touch, he was so happy to have his only child back that he couldn't even consider her family, this was a mistake. He finally spoke. He said "I just feel like every time we talk all I get is a list of complaints. I've never been the type to drudge up te past, I was hoping we could just put that behind us but I guess that's not possible with you. You were raised by your mother after all, it shouldn't surprise me."
And that's when it finally hit me, if he saw my abusive, insane, manipulative, childish, substance abusing mother as a suitable partner, he couldn't have been healthy either. And he had onviously chosen another personality disordered manipulator as his second wife.
So f*ck em.
I'm not glad I tried to reconnect with him. I wish I had realized that even if he thought I still hated him, as the parent, if he cared, he should have tried somewhere in the span of 12 years. That very probably as an adult, I wouldn't be thinking like the 12 year old he knew.
But no. That would have required effort and he wanted me to just shut up and be his kid when it was convenient for him and call it "moving forward" even tho I got none of what I needed during our attempt at a relationship. I wasn't expecting Daddy. I was grown. I was expecting a Father, tho. An adult with whom I could have an adult family relationship.
I wish I had never called. I wish I hadn't envisioned some great reunion and making up for lost time. Because I should have known that wasn't reality.
Some of our possessions are no-brainer, have to have them, best things in the universe. Others are total beaters, through and through liabilities, that should have been trashed years ago.
But what about those possessions that fall right in between?
These are the things we love as much as we hate. Like some people or places in our lives, these objects and us have a love/hate relationship--and, surprisingly, almost as much baggage as the human version includes.
Some Redditors sat down and shared their best examples of these kinds of possessions.
lliorca336 asked, "What do you have a love / hate relationship with?"
Some set their sights on the elephant in the room. They described their excitement as well as all the issues that come with the expansive, unbelievably powerful internet.
The Whole Dang Thing
"The internet." -- LM1120
"Yup. On one side, it can really help people who feel alone. However, it can also breed toxicity." -- RHCube
"Back down it was as simple as don't use it but thats not really possible anymore" -- Derpsterio29
Even More Whole
"Technology in general."
"On the one hand, it's nice that I was able to deposit a check just now while sitting down on my bedroom. On the other, screw anyone who has the audacity to call me and greet me with a robot."
"I have it with none other than 'Google.' "
"I hate it when Google tracks my every move. I even feel scared sometimes. Like just the other day, I was watching 'Padmavat' on Amazon Prime. It wasn't even my account, but my husband's. We had to stop in the middle due to something."
"And as soon as I opened my Gmail next, the very first email on the top was a 'Spam' email asking me if I missed out on watching 'Padmawat?' Really Scary!"
"And then, I love it when it takes me down the memory lane. Like just today, my Google Photos app asked me if I would like to see where I was on this day in 2010? I thought why not. Turns out, I was at my friend's wedding. Which reminded me, 'Oh! It's her anniversary today!' "
"I simply sent one of her gorgeous pics wishing her happy anniversary. We had a long chat, after which I sent over all of the pics from that day. She was really happy to re-visit them and tagged them as the best anniversary gift!"
Others chose to discuss those necessities of day-to-day life that they've actually come to love completing over and over.
But that doesn't mean they don't get annoying all the time too.
"That weird thing where I'll waste time before entering the shower because it feels like such a chore that takes a long time, I'm gonna need 5 h to dry my hair afterwards etc., but then when I'm in the shower i never wanna get out."
Cruising, Until Your Not
"Driving is my biggest love/ hate relationship. I absolutely love the feel of driving when there's a small amount/ no traffic and the feel of being able to go wherever you want in your country is so freeing. Start/stop traffic, car maintenance costs, insurance, monthly payments, terrible roads, the possibility of an accident, driving through new places without clear signage etc..."
"Man, driving at its best is one of my favourite things in life but at its worst I wonder why I ever got my license and look toward busses with jealousy."
It Will Never End
"Cooking. I hate the necessity of having to prepare food and the process itself, but I usually like the result, and if I cook for other people, I get many compliments for how it's good."
"You know, when I hate to do that, then at least it gotta be tasty."
Others spoke about the luxuries in life. It almost feels absurd to complain about such wonderful, unnecessary possessions.
And yet, they are luxuries with a slight catch.
The Nut Barrier
"Probably my biggest trigger to ruin my diet. Doesn't even have to be good chocolate. Doesn't even have to be mediocre chocolate (by American standards). I'm talking about, like Palmer's Double Crisp super-cheap, probably-not-even-actually-chocolate Chocolate."
"My only saving grace is that I'm allergic to peanuts, and a lot of the really really cheap chocolate has peanuts/peanut butter in it, so it's no longer a temptation."
More and More
"Having a home gym:"
"Love: Not having to go far and not having to deal with other ppl and their bs."
"Hate: Everything you want is much more expensive than you expect... and you keep wanting more"
Another Take on Tech
"Modern technology. For every way it makes our lives easier, there's at least five ways it makes things harder."
"But overall, it's generally worth it... if you can get the stuff to finally work, which might take you all day."
So the next time you find yourself out of wits in frustration, only to come back to that same object or task the very next day, don't feel so alone.
Everyone out here is emotionally confused about their inanimate objects and abstract concepts.
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We live in an era defined, amongst other things, by the unparalleled barrage of content that blasts our eyes and ears throughout every hour of every single day.
Truly, it's exhausting to be alive in the contemporary media landscape.
Generations before had to deal with posters, billboards, and magazine advertisements, then radio commercials after that, and then TV commercials came along.
We thought the consumer seduction reached its peak with those.
But then, lo and behold, social media came about. And now the "information" peddled by brands and advertisers is everywhere. And so so much of it is misleading, or flat out incorrect.
Some Redditors shared the examples that came to mind.
Many people chose to talk about the marketing efforts used to push health and nutrition products onto consumers.
It's no surprise that there were so many examples to choose from. People in contemporary times are obsessed with health, fitness, diet, and longevity.
So of course, marketers have taken some liberties.
"That things with 'zero sugar' can still have 0.2 grams of sugar per unit which is why tic tacs claim to be zero sugar but can still be dangerous for a diabetic person" -- Whynotgarlicbagel
"Always check the ingredients"
"I found some 'no added sugar' ice cream that had concentrated caramelised sugar syrup as a flavoring"
"Also no added sugar just means they haven't added any sugar. Not that it's zero sugar" -- EmergencyAdvance
The Natural World
" 'Natural' food isn't your definition of natural." -- Gmax100
"Cyanide is natural" -- Izwe
"Everything is natural, nuclear power plants are as natural as beaver dams" -- Skylake52
The Anti-Fat Movement
"Low fat is good for you. Well not just clever marketing, also lots of lobbying from the sugar industry" -- UltimateAnswer42
"That's a big one. Fat being the 'bad' macronutrient was something that took me a while to unlearn. I felt my healthiest when I ate a high fat, lower carb (50g or so) diet." -- Cameron213
Give Tators a Chance
"White potatoes are somehow unhealthy even though they are a very nutritious starchy root VEGETABLE."
"Just because when you smother oil and ranch on it it becomes unhealthy does not mean potatoes themselves are unhealthy."
Leave It Alone
"Vaginal odor being bad was a thing for a while, and that it could easily be corrected with over the counter treatments such as douching."
"First of all. A vagina is gonna smell like a vagina, not like flowers. If you're concerned about the way your vagina smells you should see a doctor."
"Second of all, the vagina is self-cleaning and doesn't need extra soaps to help keep it 'fresh.' In fact, those soaps and chemicals can cause harm and create real infections."
Other people chose to point out the marketing efforts that have aimed to influence our expectations of culture and the social playing field.
What is "cool" and acceptable is what sells. The question is, who decides what is "cool?"
"Makeup as a necessary norm." -- b2lose
"Man, FU** makeup! I don't wear it and have yet to have anyone I work with question my professionalism for it. I hate it, it's expensive, and I won't wear it." -- TheRedMaiden
"I love this, and I'll also throw in: shaving as a necessity. I've had so many people tell me it's 'unhygienic' for women to have leg hair." -- buriedclementines
"That teenagers are cool, tbh. Teen culture is 95% manufactured by suits trying to make a buck." -- crookedhope
"When have teenagers ever been cool to anyone but themselves?" -- troomer50
"right? this kills me as an adult. all the cool teenager sh** that 'parents don't understand' was absolutely designed by grown a** dorks just like their parents." -- likearealreptile
Passing the Buck
"The notion that climate change needs to be combated by individuals making changes in their day to day lives by buying green products. Corporations, global shipping, and factory farms all contribute massive amounts of pollution and greenhouse gasses that can't be offset by using less straws or buying a hybrid car."
"An entire city's worth of individuals couldn't even come close to offsetting the pollution created by a handful of ships used for global shipping, yet advertising would have you think that individuals could replace real systemic change and regulation."
And then there was one total, bald-faced lie. It had to do with an upsettingly common purchase that comes with an arbitrarily high price tag.
Maybe it's time to rethink it.
Pulling the Strings of Supply and Demand
"That diamonds are rare." -- icecreamterror
"That you should spend so much on a diamond and wedding, but can barely scrape by. Sure, let's throw a $30k banquet then go jumpstart the car again to get home." -- Choontz
"Futhermore on this; that 'cognac' diamonds are a desirable colour in a diamond, and are worth more than colourless. Jewellers originally struggled to sell stones of this colour so came up with a marketing concept to make them seem more unique, more special, and just as desirable as, or moreso than, colourless diamonds (which are generally far rarer, particularly if they are classified as flawless with few/imperceptible inclusions)."
"Similar idea with "champagne" diamonds...they were given this name to make them sound more appealing, too, so jewellers could still use them and increase the volume of jewellery they produce and sell." -- teenytinytinkerer
Of course, this list is so far from exhaustive. Pay attention for just the next few hours and I'm sure you'll come up with your own list of at least ten in no time.
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In the age of the internet, sometimes it can be very cool to hate on things just because other people do. Bandwagons can be fun, right? But honestly, not all of the things hated on actually deserve it. Save your hate for things that actually call for it.
Wanna jump off the bandwagon? Then keep reading!
Film and media are probably the biggest contender for being hated on randomly. It may seem harmless, but not always deserved.
Actors are people too!
Actors who played characters that people didn't like.
Really if you hated the character then the actor did a good job (assuming that was the role).
The best cartoons.nice day summer GIF by PBS KIDSGiphy
Child cartoons. Some are actually really good, even as an adult.
I feel like watching cartoons aimed at generally a younger audience allows for you to be reminded of some life lessons, I know I forget some things, or didn't realise others, or it at least partially renews my awareness of something I should still like or appreciate
This doesn't deserve awards, it's just my opinion that is apparently shared by many.
This man did nothing wrong.
Guy Fieri, he literally is the nicest person in the world but since he looks like he was electrocuted by mountain dew people want to saw his head off.
Even before that, I was witness to his other charitable work. A few years back, Santa Rosa was hit by some terrible fires and he showed up at a few shelters and personally cooked up and served some killer buffet food. No cameras, no massive team of PR, just a dude with an assistant to keep him on schedule to hit up other shelters in the area. Guy Fieri legit earned a lot of respect in my book for that.
You know who DEFINITELY doesn’t deserve hate? Animals. They’re just living their best lives, and need to be left alone.
The best cats.
We got a black cat for the first time last year. I've since formulated the theory that black cats might get some of their reputation from the fact that people can't see them well in the dark and so they seemingly appear out of nowhere and they might be instinctually cautious because they know people have a tendency to kick them while walking in the dark. Our black cat is the sweetest cat I've ever known.
They get a bad rep.Discovery Sharks GIF by Shark WeekGiphy
Sharks. They are beautiful, complex creatures, deserving of respect and, like any wild animal should be left alone in their natural habitat, but they get this reputation as vicious bloodthirsty monsters. This is only because every shark attack is news, and only then because they are so rare. More people are killed EVERY DAY by mosquitoes than sharks kill in a year.
Any apex predator that has remained evolutionarily unchanged for hundreds of millions of years, whose existance predates TREES, is deserving or our respect and admiration. Shine on, you crazy cartlaginous fish, shine on.
So cute too!
Opossums. They're neat little critters. They eat tons of ticks that carry Lyme disease, (mostly) don't carry rabies because their body temp is too low, and they're the only marsupial native to North America! They get a bad rap because their first defense is to hiss and bare teeth, but failing that, they just play dead.
If you don't have the predisposition to hate them, you'll find they're pretty cute too.
E: this is about /opossums/, the north American species.
Kiwis, I feel for you, but this comment isn't about your possums.
Hating on other people for just living their lives also seems to be a big contender for things that don’t deserve to be hated on.
This is so true.
Unemployed people. A lot of people genuinely are looking for work and did not want to lose their last job/it was beyond their control (like a layoff) but they get so much hate and called lazy by most people. I know too many unemployed people that are actually really trying hard. They definitely aren't lazy. (Not saying lazy unemployed people don't exist, but to be fair, so do lazy employed people too lol)
Leave the weather man alone!Fox Raining GIF by Family GuyGiphy
Meteorologists. They try their best to predict the weather based on patterns, models, and data. They're not perfect because predicting the weather is insanely difficult. When they get it wrong, I think we should go easy on them. It was probably an outlier result almost no one could have foreseen.
I've seen people get angry over the meteorologists for getting it right. Like they control the weather - it is their fault we are having rain, that kind of BS. Never made sense to me, but hey, I have plenty of relatives I clashed with growing up.
Please stop being d*cks to these people.
Customer service associates.
I hate when customers think that I, the minimum wage person forced to sit there and listen to them yell, am personally responsible for every policy they disagree with. Like, ma'am, if I had that much power and influence, I wouldn't be sitting here on a Saturday evening serving you.
Wholesome and necessary.
People don't deserve hate they give themselves when they are not doing too good at the moment.
If you haven't heard it from anyone else today, I'm proud of you.
It seems like people hate on things simply because they think they're meant to hate them. But you can always be the change and make an effort to stop being an a**hole about certain things.
No matter what though, sometimes haters gonna hate
Money means different things to different people.
Reddit user, u/TopTierUsername101, wanted to hear what you would do when they asked:
Just Get The Basics Out Of The Way
There's the standard responses, where people ran down the list of the essentials they could get out of the way.
Making The Unmanageable Manageable
Could pay off all debt and put a very nice down payment on a house.
Would make the mortgage manageable.
Give All The Money To The Kids
insanely.. i'm 19 and i'd be able to pay for university, pay for my car and help my parents who are on the streets rn get back on their feet and get my siblings out of foster care
You're the person I'd want to get the 100K. I don't need it; tons of people on this thread don't need it, but you my friend sound like you could use it for good.
Allowing You To Focus On Other Things
5-6 years of rent while i get my Ph.D sounds pretty fantastic
I hear this. I'm about to move with my partner so they can continue their education and would love to have $100k to live off of while I find work.
Wouldn't Go As Far As You Think
Then there's those other people who wouldn't be greatly affected by $100k, instead saying it would continue to help them comfortably move forward. Who doesn't like to be comfortable?
It would be almost enough for a downpayment on a house for us in our area. Housing is crazy expensive.
It would be less than half of a downpayment on an avg house in my area. This is basically keeping my generation from owning property and it's terrifying.
(avg. House here is about 1.2million)
A Slow Burn
Immediately? Not much at all. I'd pay off all my debt, take a chunk out of the house Im about to sign on. The monthly savings however would really allow me to change my life though.
Same here. A lot would change on paper, but the real effects wouldn't be apparent for several years.
This, also the peace of mind that would come along with it would be the most significant Change
Preparing For The Future
Just more money for retirement. That's all, business as usual.
Same. I mean, I'd say I'd spend some and go on vacation, but my vacations are typically camping somewhere cool and then hiking, so it's pretty frugal as far as vacations go. I'd like think that I could retire a little earlier if I had an extra 100 grand thrown at me, though.
Making A Huge Impact
Finally, there's those people who would do quite a bit if you were gifted $100k. This runs the length of saving lives to crafting a livable future.
Eliminating That Feeling
I'd be able to afford my own apartment instead of living with 3 ppl. I'd be able to focus more on building my life instead of just trying to survive every day. I'd be able to donate to charities and less fortunate ppl in my area.
Overall it would make my life less stressful and make me feel like less of a failure.
America Isn't Very Good Sometimes
Dude, that's almost 7 years worth of insulin. Can you imagine not having to wonder how you were going to manage your life threatening disease for 7, well technically 6.9, years? God, I could actually put money toward my future rather than trying desperately to stay alive in the present.
If the current rate of inflation continues, and if I am lucky enough to live until 75, I will have spent over 7 million dollars on insulin alone, not including other absurdly expensive diabetic supplies, like test strips, that are absolutely necessary for my survival.
Just for some context, each test strip, without insurance, runs you around 1.50 ($75 for a 50 pack of strips) and as someone who leads an active lifestyle and is insulin sensitive, I need to check my blood sugar roughly 6-8 times a day, more if I'm sick or an unforeseen event occurs that affects my blood glucose levels.
It's f-cking criminal what my country is allowing to happen to type one diabetics like myself.
Money Can't Buy Happiness, Until It Does
It would: pay off my husband's student loans and some medical bills that he has left, pay off my dental bill, pay off our credit cards, and then maybe we could get some upkeep/fixit stuff done around the house. The rest would go into savings. We'd have a good amount of money freed up each month, and that would also go into savings.
So, really, $100k would change my life by finally giving me a decent savings account that could be used in the future to hopefully avoid debt. It would be a very nice thing to have.
Dan Price, the CEO of Gravity Payments who became famous when he cut his 1.1 million dollar salary to ensure every one of his employees received a $70k a year salary, probably said it best when he noted, "Money buys happiness when you climb out of poverty. But going from well-off to very well-off won't make you happier. Doing what you believe is right will."
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