People Share How Their 'Something's Not Right' Gut Feeling Saved Their Life

My number one rule in life has always been "trust your gut". Your body and brain know you better than anyone, and are able to warn you when something just isn't right. Your gut is there to warn you- listen to it. Here are a few examples, courtesy of the kind people over at Reddit.
u/IChronoI asked: Hey Reddit, when did your "something's not right here" gut feeling ever save you?
A good save.
I went to hospital with shortness of breath and my heart racing. They did a chest x-ray, blood test for blood clots, ECG, and a few other tests but all came back normal. After observing me overnight everything still looked good, oxygen saturation was perfect, my heart rate was still a bit elevated but nothing too crazy, and it seemed that it was likely leftover symptoms from a bad virus that I'd had a week or so earlier.
The ER doctor asks me how I would feel if they sent me home and I just had a bad feeling about it all. I told him as such and that I had no real basis for it except that I just felt off about it. He said fair enough, let's try one more test and if that comes back negative then we'll send you up to General Medicine and see if they can track something down.
That test was a VQ scan that found despite all other tests showing no results for blood clots, I actually had a whole bunch of them in both lungs. I ended up with a diagnosis of unprovoked bilateral pulmonary embolisms and am on blood thinners for life.
Super grateful both for the bad feeling and the ER doctor who was willing to listen to it!
Stupid deer.
I used to just drive around country roads when I would feel stressed out or sad as a way to just get away and listen to music. One evening I was driving with my best friend in the car and we're on a gravel road that has a huge hill. We were driving towards the sunset but it was winter and the light was fading fast. As the car started down the hill I had this moment where I thought to myself "my brights should be on" and I flicked them on and at the bottom of this super steep hill stood 6 deer on the road.
I slammed on the brakes and the car turned sideways and skidded to a stop like 4 feet from the deer. Those stupid deer didn't even move, they just stared into the passenger side of my car and my best friend pointed at them and said "hey, deer". The car was fine, we were fine, and Bambi was all good. I don't drive around like that anymore.
Glad the parents listened.
I was learning violin when I was about 10 from an instructor at my local music shop. I got the weirdest feeling from him even though he didn't do anything out of the ordinary. I wanted to vomit every time I looked at him, especially his hands. After 4 lessons I told my parents that I had a terrible feeling about him and I never wanted to go back. Luckily, they listened and didn't make me ever go to him again.
A few years later he was arrested for assaulting multiple of his students. I have no idea how I knew something was off. He never did or said anything but I just felt it.
Poor pup.
I woke up from a deep sleep at like 2AM during a winter storm, something wasn't right... I immediately went looking for my senior dog and couldn't find her anywhere in the house. My roommates had had let her out for a walk and closed door. I ran to the front of the house and found her laying on the welcome mat, she was hardly breathing and covered in snow... She had been outside alone for at the very least 5 hours.Good intuition.
I was walking out of a grocery store when I saw this kid about to cross the road. Something came over me and I yanked him back onto the sidewalk. Not even a second later a truck came flying past. He was probably around 7 or 8ish.
No more late night strolls.
When I was in college, I lived in a sketchy part of Chicago (Humboldt Park/Logan Square before gentrification).
I liked to take late night strolls, even when I was living in that neighborhood as a 20-year-old woman. Yeah, I know. Pretty dumb of me.
One night, I was feeling stressed out so I embarked on one of my late night strolls.
I was walking along a somewhat busy road. Cars were zooming past me. Pretty normal. I wasn't paying much attention because I was too wrapped up in whatever was stressing me out that night. Suddenly, a chill shot up my spine. Hypervigilance washed over me and I became more alert than I had ever been. Something was wrong. Someone was watching me.
I quickly spotted a car. It was driving in the opposite direction, a little slower than usual. It was too dark for me to see anyone inside the car, and the car was pretty unassuming. But I still knew something was off. They were watching me. I just knew.
The car drove past me and then made a u-turn. Now it was right behind me, creeping along the curb.
Luckily, there was a Walgreens a few blocks ahead. I started walking faster, and the car eventually sped past me and disappeared into a corner. I somehow knew I wasn't safe yet, so I still sprinted to Walgreens.
I told the security guard what happened, and we both went outside. The car was parked up the street, about 50-100 feet away. The security guard was a big guy who looked intimidating. He marched toward the car, and the car immediately backed up, made a u-turn, and then booked it out of there. The security guard called the cops, and they drove me home.
I never took a late night stroll again.
My gut made me more alert, but it was really the security guard who saved my life. I'm positive that if he wasn't there that night, something bad would've happened to me. I wish I could find that security guard to thank him.
A freak accident.
Not me but my science teacher, when she was a teenager she was standing near some lights at a pedestrian crossing with her and her friend. Very chill but out of nowhere she had this gut feeling that both of them had to move.
They moved just a couple metres away and the next moment a car had hit another car and had hit one of the street electricity utility poles and it had fell and exploded (minor explosion enough distance away that it didn't hurt the girls) exactly where they were. One of the wires had also snapped and hit it exactly where they were standing as well.
They basically were in a scene of car wreckage and snapped wires and electricity explosions and the pole collapse. Just real insane. If the pole had missed them, the wire would have hit them and if not that then most likely the cars.
That gut feeling of moving away saved both of them. I remember this story so clearly from high school science class because it was such a WTF, pity I only paid attention to these things and not actually science hehe
That's terrifying.
My sister since she was about 5 was always obsessed with Tsunamis and would always ask my dad every night before she went to sleep if there would be a tsunami that night (we lived on a beach)
About 5 years later when our family was holidaying in Samoa an earthquake struck at about 6am. It was only a dull low rumble but went on for over a minute. Everyone at the resort woke up and went outside for a few minutes then went back to bed. My sister having been obsessed with Tsunamis ran down to look at the water and noticed the sea going out and saved a lot of lives including my own.
There was about a minute from her noticing till the Tsunami hit. Luckily for us there was a cliff right behind the resort if not a lot more people would have been killed.
So something like a gut feeling 5 years in the making
That is horrifying.
My mom and her entire family were saved from dying from Carbon Monoxide poisoning by her dad. He left for work, got a weird feeling and drove back home. Everyone in the house was unconscious, and he had to drag or carry them all outside one by one. They all survived.
It could happen to anyone.
I went out with my best friend on new years last year and were having drinks with her friends when I realized I was out of cigarettes. I left for a few minutes to walk over and grab a pack and ended up talking to a homeless guy for a while, and when I went over to the entrance of the bar she was outside and said something mean to me for no reason and walked off. I was confused so I decided it would be good if I took a walk to let her cool off and then figure out what she was upset about.
I was going to walk down the street for a bit but something told me to turn left, walking behind the bar and then turning to the side of the bar when I see a girl laying down on the sidewalk and people walking by her. As I'm walking over to help I realize its my friend and she's not very conscious. She was probably drugged while I was getting smokes and who knows what would've happened if I hadn't decided to go that way!
Scares the sh*t out of me.
Earthquakes are no joke.
This also wasn't too bad of a something doesn't feel right, but an ehh it can wait till later in the morning.
November 30, 2018. Me, my husband and our kids drove down to Anchorage, Alaska. (We live in Palmer about an hour away and my husband's work is in Anchorage). We left at 7 am because we had an event at 5 in Wasilla, closer to Palmer but an hour out of Anchorage, so he needed time to drive back out.
The reason me and my kids drove down was because one of my sisters and her family were down and had a hotel with a pool (luxury to most people here). So that day we planned on buying swimsuits for the kids so they can go and swim.
As soon as we make it to my husband's work I contemplated whether I should head to Walmart then or later to buy swimsuits for my kids. I decided on later as I was still tired.
As some of you may know, we had a 7.2 earthquake that morning at 8:29 am. I watched as the trees sitting in front of me swayed back and forth, same with the huge lights in the parking lot. I looked over to watch all surrounding buildings swaying.
Had I headed out when I wanted to I would have been in Walmart with three children under the age of 5 with the shelves flying everywhere. Idk if anyone has seen pictures or videos, but the Fred Meyer Video made my stomach churn as I thought of us being in Walmart at the same time.
Had my husband left at his regular time that day he would have been near one of the larger road destructions.
That's devastating.
Wife called me while I was at work, just to say she was home from her night shift and planning to go to bed.
She had worked night shift for years and never called me just to say she was home and going to bed before. She also sounded weirdly detached on the call. I asked her if she was okay, she said yes — just really sleepy.
I got a weird feeling and told her I was going to leave work and come home. She told me I didn't need to, I said okay...and then I left work and rushed home anyway.
Found a suicide note taped to the garage door.
I got to her in time, rushed her to the ER, and got her the help she needed. A week of inpatient psych, followed by changes to medications and doctors.
This was about five months ago, and she is so much better now.
Always trust your gut.
Not mine, my old 5th grade teacher.
One day she was driving down the freeway on her way to the store, she was in the far left lane, traffic was light. Then she said she heard a voice saying to turn out of the lane, she ignored it and it went on a few more times before she finally gave into it and turned into the very next lane to her left. A few minutes later a car is speeding down the lane she was just in going the opposite direction. She had said she never listen to her gut before and after that day she said she doesn't doubt her gut for a second.
Always use your EpiPen!!!
Accidentally ate something I'm allergic to at a family get together. Never been one to use my EpiPen immediately (I know, stupid), so I just took a bunch of Benadryl in the hopes it'd be enough to curb the anaphylaxis that was starting. Luckily, it was. After that ordeal, I asked my father to give me a ride home so I could rest. At this point my only symptoms were intense nausea and cramps. Half way home, I get a "sense of impending doom" and immediately say "go to the ER."
He obviously asks why, and I just say "I don't really know, but something's wrong." He protests a bit, but I insist. Sure enough, probably like 30 minutes later I have a horrible relapse reaction, and end up stuck in the ER for roughly 8 hours because of it. Needless to say, never will I ever ignore that "sense of impending doom."
Never trust a white van.
When I was 13, I was walking home from school with my little sister and my best friend. We lived in a extremely safe neighbourhood, where nothing ever happened. While we were walking, I noticed something out of the corner of my eye. It was a white delivery van parked about 100 meters from us. Something about that van irked me and made me feel sick to the stomach. I told my friend and my sister to walk a bit faster.
About 10 minutes later I turn around and the same van is there. At this point my gut is screaming at me to run, so I grab the others and we sprint towards the mall, now that we are off the road, we are safe.
The next day we hear in the news that there has been several cases of vans trying to grab children and kidnap them. Two kids from a nearby school are missing. If I hadn't trusted my gut feeling, the girls and I probably would've been kidnapped.
People Break Down Historical Events Some Folks Believe To Be True But Are 100% Fake
When I was seven, I saw a cartoon of Ben Franklin discovering electricity when lightning accidentally struck a kite that he was flying. I didn’t totally understand how that helped him discover electricity, but since I was only seven, I believed that to be what happened.
The truth is, Ben Franklin did not actually discover electricity -- that happened over 1,000 years prior. He just demonstrated the connection between lightning and electricity.
Moreover, his kite was not accidentally struck by lightning. If it was, the lighting would’ve struck him by extension, and he might not have even survived long enough to demonstrate his findings. In fact, the kite was part of an experiment that he conducted on purpose.
I know all this now, but not everyone does. A lot of people still believe lightning accidentally struck Ben Franklin’s kite, and that he discovered electricity through that happy accident. And that is just one of the many historic events that people believe in.
However, most of those events either didn’t happen at all or happened differently than we may think.
Redditors have recognized a lot of other historical events or facts that people believe, but are actually fake or untrue, and have shared this information.
It all started when Redditor FarajEltaira asked:
“What is a part of history that we consider to be a fact is 100% fake?”
The Absence Of Color
"Ninjas dressed in all black to stay stealthy in the night or something like that. Ninjas dressed like normal people to blend in, the all black look stemmed from Japanese theatre to make it more obvious to the audience who the ninjas were."
"If they wore all black it'd be quite obvious and they'd stick out like a sore thumb"
"EDIT: most of you pointed out it also came from stagehands, that makes a lot of sense too"
– Darth_Fata*s
Pull It Tight
"Corsets were not typically tight laced. They were only tight laced by the highly fashionable women, and usually only for particular events or portraits. Corsets were designed to be comfortable. Women wore a cotton layer underneath the corset, so it didn't rub against the skin. The corset was more like a bra, bit instead of using the shoulders to support it used the whole torso. Some people claim they are much more comfortable than modern bras. The intense proportions of the past were achieved with Corsets AND padding. Tight lacing was uncommon, but layers of petticoats or hoops or bum rolls or whatever else at the time was very common to give women the trendy body shape at the time."
– yikesemu
In The Ring
"The image of Roman gladiators fighting to the death. While there were many exhibition fights in the arenas where the goal was death, these were not gladiator contests. Prisoners, and the condemned, were thrown out to fight to the death, but not real gladiators.Training a gladiator was an expensive, and lengthy, investment and having them die constantly would be bad for business."
– Sorripto
"The Midnight Ride Of Paul Revere
"Paul Revere did not run around Massachusetts shouting "The British are coming" because if he did everyone would look at him like he'd lost his mind. ALMOST EVERYONE IN THE COLONIES WAS BRITISH!"
"He actually said, "The Regulars are coming""
– Kind-Detective1774
"He also only carried that message for a small stretch of the ride. There were about a half dozen messengers passing it along. We remember Paul Revere as the only rider because, no joke, his name fit best in Longfellow’s poem"
– JRBehr
All The Information
"The Lady who sued McDonalds didn't do so frivolously. She received third degree burns from how hot that coffee was, and needed a skin graft. It was quickly found that that location was keeping the coffee well above the temperature you can legally serve a hot drink in a cup at. The fact that most people think this suit was over the temperature of the coffee, and not the debilitating burns that woman recieved, is one of the PR worlds greatest triumphs. You are not immune to propaganda."
– P41nB0i
All You Read Is Not True
"That Einstein said “ The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results”"
– Tjblacka*s
""Don't believe everything you read on the internet" - Albert Einstein"
– AceBean27
Math Genius
"Einstein never failed math, the rumor started from Ripley’s Believe It Or Not and Einstein actually responded to them saying “I never failed in mathematics. Before I was 15 I had mastered differential and integral calculus.” He wasn’t very good at the non-science related classes though and did fail French."
– Think-Huckleberry965
A Quiet Night
"The Boston Tea party didn’t have some grand celebration, a lot of the colonists were confused and it’s recorded as one of Boston’s most quiet nights"
– _britishpeople76
Time Difference
"A stegosaurus fighting a t rex. They lived millions of years apart . Stegosaurus 144 lived million years ago T rex 65 million years ago."
"Insane difference. Still almost most every dinosaur related media places them together."
– NLSecondguess
"Whatever the f*ck is on the History Channel nowadays."
– wiseowl777
"I know the exact moment I gave up on the History Channel. A guy came in to a pawn shop with a uniform and said, "it's from the war with the Philippines.""
"The guy in the shop said, "there's no such thing as the war with the Philippines.""
"My undergrad senior thesis was on the Philippine-American war."
– sadwer
"It ain't even historical anymore they should rename it as the "whatever we feel like it" channel"
– ami-the-gae
"What's Up, Doc?"
"Rabbits CANNOT live on a diet of carrots and fruits. It’s like asking a toddler to live on a diet of candy. They also cannot live on a diet of completely lettuce and leaves (though it’s close)."
"Rabbits need need need hay for a healthy diet, and pellets are heavily recommended as well(though they also have limits, should be in the bag according to the bunny’s weight). Greens are good, not to be the main main diet, and fruits or carrots can be given as treats."
"Bugs Bunny led a lot of people to believe rabbits live off of carrots. They do not. They will die if you expect them to live on a diet of 100% carrots."
– Random_Loaf
The Teeth Of The Matter
"That George Washington had wooden teeth. He had false teeth, yes. But they were made of ivory. He never had wooden teeth."
– randomthoughtsofnaps
A Wooden Horse?
"The Trojan Horse wasn't real. Historians are all pretty much unanimous on this."
– the-ender-enby
"My personal theory is that the trojan horse story relates to a traitor within Troy's cavalry"
– TheMissingThink
"William Howard Taft never got stuck in a bathtub!"
– Alexxx_starlet
"I also find it weird/hilarious/sad that that's what he's known for instead of being known for being the only person to have served as both President and Chief Justice of the Supreme Court."
– Flashpenny
Is it weird that I’m sad the bathtub thing turned out to be false?
People really need to think about tattoos.
Yes, they're cool sometimes.
But how many do you really need?
Some can seriously spoil a romantic moment.
Redditor Flowerlock wanted to hear about the body art that has left people less than attracted, so they asked:
"What tattoo is a turn off?"
I'm thinking about a tattoo, but I don't have the nerve.
This list may have me reconsider.
AHHHHHH!!!!
"When I was changing with my boyfriend for the first time, he took off his pants and his entire upper left leg was covered with giant leopard spots."
"I almost screamed."
TheBIackened
Follow the Letters
"Misspelled words."
simplyani
"Sometimes it can work out though..."
"Some time ago a girl tweeted she got a Waterparks song tattooed on her and it had been misspelt, which caught the attention of the band and they officially changed to the name of the song to match her misspelt tattoo."
"Just one of those rare instances in life that works out for some unfortunate girl who got a bad tattoo... lmao."
Charlie483
Just, whyyy?!
"Anything poorly drawn. My ex was a hot guy. He got a wolf tattoo on his chest. Omg, it had crossed eyes and a fat weird face and for some reason pine trees embedded in the fur. Ugh. Just, whyyy?!"
EdgeMiserable4381
"My neighbor got a wolf tat done when he was super drunk. Besides the fact that all the detail was blurry, the wolf had a short, stunted muzzle. It was like a pug with a glorious mane."
IntheCompanyofOgres
Basics
"I know everyone has different standards of quality and art is subjective but I think (within reason of course) the worst tattoo is just a badly done one. Lacking a basic understanding of anatomy, bad shading, terrible line quality, patchy colour, etc. I'm not a fan of certain tattoo styles but if they're done well I can respect them."
capricious_achelois
Know Better
"Random Chinese words on someone who has no idea what they even say."
chickadeedeedee_
"A friend of mine who visited Korea got a giant tattoo running down her back. She thought it meant 'love my family,' or something like that. I didn't have the heart to tell her that my other friend (a Korean) quietly translated it to 'foreigner.'"
Ccoyotee
Use a translation book friends.
Ownership
"Property of (NOT YOUR NAME)."
masterofallvillainy
"Plot twist: they only date people with the same name so they don't need to remove the tattoo."
HirokoKueh
Gross
"Giant pectoral swastika."
Senator_Chickpea
"Yeah my neighbor has one. He got it in prison years ago."
"As he says it, when he was young he got into trouble, went to prison, joined the Aryan brotherhood for protection, served his sentence and has been trying to distance himself from them for years."
"He got it removed but a scar remains. The scar isn't super big and obvious, but it is noticeable, like a slight mis-colouring of the skin, the kinda thing that draws your eye and your not sure you can see anything, but it's a very distinct pattern and your brain puts together what it is after a bit."
Bigbadsheeple
God Knows
"Only God can judge me."
hunterbidensLT
"A friend of mines father was supposed to get 'Only God can judge me' written in olde’ English font across the width of his back. The tattooist was dyslexic and managed to finish the tattoo with 'Only God can Jude me.'"
"He had to have a cover up of his entire upper back as it couldn’t be fixed. He was an absolute chopper of a bloke and got rinsed for years. People still call him Jude now."
Djr215
Puff Puff
"A Marijuana plant. I like smoking myself and do it often, but I wouldn’t go as far as to tattoo it on me. Those I’ve seen get it tatted on them normally revolve their whole personality around it which is very dull in my opinion."
yeyewestie
"Same goes for the people who wear marijuana leaf attire. My wife likes all that and brags how she’s a bigger pothead than me, and I feel like a fool when I have to be like okay? Like I have a job I can’t be strutting around in that crap... lol."
that_bearded_guy_94
Suddenly...
"My family and I once saw a biker with 'Seymour' written right above his butt crack when we were on a road trip."
Falling_Tomatoes
Be really, really, really sure about body art.
And make sure you like the stencil on your body BEFORE they start inking you.
We're talking placement and size. It never hurts to really think these things through.
Men Explain Which F**ked Up Things They're Supposed To Be Okay With Because They're Men
Why are men forced to be things they're not?
We are too far along as a society not to let the boys grow and evolve.
A good cry, a good laugh, a song, hug, a dance it out... can help anybody.
Or maybe just watch an episode of 'Grey's Anatomy.'
Redditor 040607AJF wanted all the guys out there to share how they "feel" so they asked:
"Men of Reddit, what is something f**ked up that you're supposed to be okay with because you're a man?"
Gents, it's time to start healing and growing.
Go to sleep
"Having sex whenever she's in the mood. And if I say no she thinks something wrong with her so you get pressured into doing it so she won't be mad or feel sad."
dabbiedabbiedoo
Grief
"30 year old male from India. Lost my dad 20 days back in an accident Relatives and well wishers spend time talking and pacifying mom/sister and listen to them with patience. To me before they leave- 'Now it's your responsibility to take care of your mom/sister' and nothing else."
"What about my grief of losing a parent? How do I handle it? Who is going to pacify me? Who listens to me? Without support from my wife and my friends, I could have gone insane the way people expect me to treat grief."
pgaravindhsf
Red Flags
"Depression and loneliness, as much as I wish I could say the support gotten better it hasn’t. I see the 'mens mental health awareness month' bulls**t all over social media for a day once a year but then nobody speaks about it. Being depressed or saying you’re lonely can often be seen as a cry for attention or a 'red flag' for partners."
"People on social media think posting some picture of 'We need to support our men in the world!' Is going help, it doesn’t. If you legitimately care about the men in your life’s mental health please reach out to them and ask how they’ve been. Don’t compare to them and don’t undermine them just understand them. It does so much for them."
Senior-Place-7627
“figure it out”
"The fact that a lot of men have no guidance and are supposed to just figure s**t out or just know yet people will treat you like s**t for not knowing."
DeepTalkTv
"When I was younger I was always told to 'figure it out' cause I’m a man. Every time I needed help whether it be homework, a flat tire, or something I genuinely needed help with like applying for college/fafsa I was turned away because it was my problem. Now if any family needs my help I’m demonized if I say no. Like wtf man I was taught not to bother y’all why are y’all bothering me?!?"
Mountain_Ad1797
911
"You can ask for my help, but I can't ask for yours."
spenser1994
Leave me be...
"Some women should understand that men can be 'not in the mood' as well. I don't know why many people think that men will never say 'no.' I saw many on Twitter, sadly both men and women, thinking that men are these cartoonish wolves that will start salivating and have their eyes turn into hearts when anyone mentions the word 'sex.'"
Inevitable_Count_370
Out of the Norm
"Getting weird judgment from others for not conforming to the ‘traditional’ male role in a marriage or family. My wife is a highly driven genius, makes a great living, and loves what she does. I’m full time in the arts, and I’m not completely dependent on her, but I don’t have traditional employment or make a lot of money."
"I’ve had people in my life (especially older people) throw shade at me for not being ambitious enough or not having a real career. But together we’re doing much better than okay, and I’m probably gonna be the main caretaker when/if we have kids. I feel that if she were a man and I were a woman, nobody would question it at all."
LovesRefrain
Mind Games
"We aren't taught how to deal with emotions. (Mental health too)."
"I'm not advocating for men to be super-soft emotional wrecks, or to cry five times a week. But man I wish I knew I wasn't 'wrong' or 'weak' or 'avoiding becoming a man' just because I was sad, depressed, anxious and trying to deal with past events."
Maestroifuplz
"So many women in my lifetime have acted like I’m not a strong guy because I show emotion. I have a big heart and I’m not going to change that for anyone. But I’ve had relationships take an immediate downturn when I showed any kind of sensitive side."
Gamur
A New Leaf
"That If I ever finish my AA and teach preschool that I’ll be seen as a threat to children."
bahardesty
"I have known two men attempt to enter the teaching profession. My advice is don't! It really is not worth your time."
raceAround126
Oh gents, we all still have a long way to go.
Do you have anything to add? Let us know in the comments below.
When singles finally find a romantic partner after what may have seemed like an eternal love drought, they make sure they put in all the effort it takes to keep that relationship going strong.
However, there are those who are convinced that the love they found is too good to be true–probably because they may feel they don't deserve it or because they have doubts.
That's the thing about those who don't trust a good thing when it happens. Their skepticism can be all-consuming and it can lead to self-sabotaging the relationship.
Curious to hear from those who struggle with the "what ifs" in their relationship, Redditor DinoNuggieVape asked:
"How do you cope with the fear of your partner cheating on you?"
A certain hobby is more likely to prevent wandering eyes.
Commitment To Knitting
"I’ve been cheated on by my only other long term partner beside my wife. I don’t worry about my wife because 1.) I trust her and 2.) having an affair would cut too much into her knitting time. Hell, I feel like 'the other man' when compared to yarn."
– JohnnyIsCross
Relatable Concern
"As someone who crochets, I’m sure this is how my partner feels 😂"
– shwee2019
Sew What?
"Mine sews. You're said the Perfect comment. I once complained to my wife about being second love. She sewed me a blanket, and it's now my most comfortable possession. Find the right one for you."
– BPGizza
Fixating on the possibility is the bigger problem, according to these love experts.
Stop Obsessing
"By coming to terms with the FACT that there is literally nothing you can do to control what another person chooses to do."
– Pairadockcickle
Find Your Self-Worth
"Too many people hang on to the idea of 'I can’t live without this person' love."
"Yeah, you can. Realizing you can exist on your own and be fulfilled. After that? You’ll realize you can survive a cheater."
– 5hrs4hrs3hrs2hrs1mor
Finding Independence In Love
"I can't live without this person"
"That's not love. It's obsession. Once you realize you don't need the other person to live, you can start to truly love them."
– Ch4l1t0
Fooled Once
"This. I had two partners (possibly three, not sure on the last one) that cheated on me. The first one I know for sure. It feels absolutely soul wrecking. So I do know how it feels. But I do also know the signs and what to look out for. Investigating phones or emails or listening for hushed conversations aside, the biggest tell tale is in the personality change. It happens 100% of the time. That is at least from talking to other people about it has led me to conclude anyway. You can always tell. And if you suspect, you could well be right."
"I'm not Mr. Paranoid or anything, but the reality is if she's going to cheat on you, then it's going to happen. There is nothing you can do, if it's going to happen, you can't control it. What you can control however is your reaction to it. And mine is very simple. End of relationship, block contact, see you later. The second time it happened to me, I didn't even offer an explanation. Her friend contacted me at some point asking why I had cold cut her out of my life and how it was so f'ked up of me to do so. I simply responded that I knew she was screwing someone behind my back, to which her friend replied, 'Oh you know about that? Well it really doesn't matter, it's you she wants!' I don't think I actually responded, I hung up."
"Getting past that business for the second time was remarkably easy. She had a few things left at my place which went into the bin, hoovered my house, cleaned the bathroom and kitchen, threw out the few bits in the fridge as I used to get some food items that she liked but I never used, total clean out. I didn't feel the need to go nail a new girl that instant, instead spent the evening playing some guitar and watched a movie. I was perfectly happy and was done with the whole thing in an evening practically."
– raceAround126
The pain cuts deep, but these Redditors learned to move on.
Trust Goes A Long Way
"I’ve been cheated on by every partner I’ve ever had. I just got married 6 months ago to the only person I’ve ever actually trusted. It comes natural which is crazy… i do have moments where i het intrusive thoughts at random like 'what if…' but i snap myself out of it and remind myself how truly trustworthy this man is and how i know he loves me. A lot of commenters seem to not understand that being cheated on can cause a type of ptsd. It’s something you just work through."
– tmtm1119
Lingering Trauma
"Agree, my ex cheated on me 16 years ago and I think I will always have some doubts. My wife, who I've been with over 12 years, has never once done anything that would make me think she would cheat on me, and I trust her completely, but that trauma from 16 years ago is is still there, rearing it's ugly head from time to time."
– BigSlade2001
I find that being obsessed with the possibility of one cheating on another can manifest in ways that jeopardize a solid relationship.
It's more important to appreciate being in the moment when something is going well, whether it's a relationship or anything else applicable.
Because fixating on the "what ifs" can take up a lot of energy that could be better spent on enjoying a healthy relationship.
While your instincts are usually reliable, always remember that communicating a doubt that is becoming an obsession is vital to sustaining a trusting and respectful relationship.