Social Butterflies Share Advice On How To Make Meaningful Friendships As An Adult
Social Butterflies Share Advice On How To Make Meaningful Friendships As An Adult
[rebelmouse-image 18360151 is_animated_gif=Many children seem to have almost no problems making friends. "Oh, hi fellow person who is approximately my age and is within reasonable proximity to me, we're friends now!" and that's it. It's almost like they don't really have a criteria past that, and that's great! It means making friendships that matter tends to come easier for them. But what about us adults? One reddit user asked:
How do you actually meet new people and make meaningful connections over the age of 20?
And we were like "... ... ... actually we have no idea." and hopped right into this thread ready to screenshot and implement new ideas. Why? Because we need actual in-person friends, that's why. We love you dearly, citizens of internet, but you guys can't come out with us to try and match beta fish to the wall color of the room the fish tank is in. Wait, we might know why we have no friends...
Click next and read through while we sit and do some serious contemplation about ourselves.
Begin With The Beginners
[rebelmouse-image 18360152 is_animated_gif=Join a beginner's class for something new that sounds interesting every once in a while! Best case, you make some new friends and maybe find a fun new hobby. Worst case, you still try something new and maybe get some good stories out of it.
Seriously, I took a couple fencing lessons and while it turns out fencing is totally not for me, I met some awesome people through it. And I took a cooking class where I didn't really meet anybody I clicked with, but now I know how to make crepes, so I'm calling it a win
Wardrobe Change
[rebelmouse-image 18360154 is_animated_gif=I'm going to be 100% honest, when I first turned 18 I had no confidence. I had been to a bar a couple times and the extent of my knowledge was "I'll have a beer".
I'm not making this up when I say floral shirts changed that. I wore a floral shirt to the club (first time I ever went to a club) because my friend said "wear something funky so that it catches the black light nicely" so I did and instantly people came up to me and talked to me. Sometimes you don't have to directly make an effort but I guess when you do something that catches people's attention in an out-there way (positively and innocently) it helps. I found myself having conversations that I didn't start. It definitely helped me get out of my shell :)
Put It All Out There
[rebelmouse-image 18360155 is_animated_gif=By going to activities you're actually interested in. Look up local meet up groups for dog walking or dungeons and dragons or tomahawk throwing... whatever your interests are and then go. If you're active in your professional field, go to happy hours or chat up coworkers at lunchtime.
Honestly, it's more about putting yourself out there than anything else. I'm naturally introverted so I understand how hard it can be; but in relationships of any kind you really do get out what you put in.
Wait, There's An OUT Of The House?
[rebelmouse-image 18360156 is_animated_gif=Find someone at work you don't hate. Invite them to do something you like. See if it works out. If not, eh, try again with someone or something else. Get a gym membership, take a class in something (anything), go to a bar and go for broke on karaoke, volunteer somewhere... Common thread: you have to get out of the house, man. More than likely, you're going to have to make the first move, too. It'll be ok though.
Friend Date
[rebelmouse-image 18353388 is_animated_gif=I asked a girl from work out on a friend date. We went to the movies and saw the matador. It was weird and awkward at first to do it but she's been my best friend for 13 years and we still tell people our "first date" story . I met the rest of my friends through a guy she dated, we started going to a weekly pub quiz with some of his friends. The friends loved us and kept us! They're pretty much my family I love them all so much.
Do You, Boo
[rebelmouse-image 18360157 is_animated_gif=In my honest efforts over the last year to achieve this sort of stuff, the best I've come up with is to just do you. Like playing music? Buy a ukelele! Wanna be more active? Try out that climbing gym! Think you should call your mom more? You probably should!
When you do the things you love, meaningful connections will gravitate to you. People who share your passions or admire your skills. Sometimes the best was to start, is by making a meaningful connectionwith yourself.
Do Not Want
[rebelmouse-image 18360158 is_animated_gif=After I leave work, I want to leave work. Unless it's obvious that my co-worker and I would get along, I will leave work at work.
A few years ago, I realized I was isolating due to my addiction and, after I cleaned up, took several chances on meeting people. All my friends from high school had moved away. All the people I knew from college were starting families and businesses and generally didn't have time for me. So, I just started fishing. I still remember the first time I tried to buddy up with some rando. He was a nice guy and I wasn't being creepy. Just continued a conversation that he started. After a while he just kind of walked away. I remember being confused and hurt, like I had just been turned down by a girl! But I just kept trying. Honestly, it's also difficult to friend randos without a similar interest or topic to bond over, in my opinion. Unless booze is involved, but you never know if the person you've "friended" is the real friend or the inebriated person. Plus, the whole sobriety thing puts a damper on that for me.
The way I finally started meeting up and hanging out with people is by joining music appreciation group. They found out I could sing and I joined a "band" for a while. I met more people through those people and now I have regular friends for the first time in my adult life.
My suggestion would be to look for groups that meet up with similar interests. Or to go to a beginners class in whatever.
The hardest lesson for me to learn (other than to be OK with being me, first) was to not be weirded out when someone doesn't want to be your friend. The thing is, someone is going to try to be your friend and you'll want nothing to do with them. That's just the way it works.
Buddies With The Bar Staff
[rebelmouse-image 18360159 is_animated_gif=Moved to a new city at age 44...went to a local watering hole and became acquainted with the management, bartenders and waitstaff. Everything just fell into place after that.
Get A Better Job
[rebelmouse-image 18352002 is_animated_gif=Most of my new connections are from work. But its important to note that i found a job that is similar to my hobbies, so meeting like minded people was easy.
Follow Your Interests
[rebelmouse-image 18360160 is_animated_gif=How I've met new people outside of college:
- Gaming tournaments
- DnD games
- Tech talks
- Language classes
- Friends of friends
Basically stuff that I'm interested in, and activities where you would keep meeting the same people over a period of time. If you think about it, people make friends in school because they keep being around the same people.
Significant Problem
[rebelmouse-image 18360161 is_animated_gif=Step one: acquire SO who is good at making friends Step two: let them do it for you
Puppy Power!
[rebelmouse-image 18346495 is_animated_gif=Dogs. Own, love, walk, understand, and generally allow yourself to succumb to dogs.
Dog people talk to each other and share their madness. You have a reason to meet, a reason to get out, and a shared pleasure.
Plus, and this is key, dogs are the best.
Dating Apps
[rebelmouse-image 18360162 is_animated_gif=If you're not in school, work. If not from work, through mutual friends at social outings. Sometimes randomly when you go out.
There's also using dating apps for strictly platonic connections. Some people, I've noticed, use them for friends and friends only.
FORD Tough
[rebelmouse-image 18360163 is_animated_gif=I've found that being open to new experiences is a top contender. Going to events you think you might just enjoy, and then trying to talk to people there. A compliment, passing comment, or even a direct introduction to a new person could get them talking. If they're interesting, perfect, if not. Well, there are many more people out there. Don't be afraid to cold approach people, and don't be afraid to ask questions. People love talking about themselves. Help them do that. A basic rule of thumb is as follows: FORD. Family, occupation, recreation, and dreams. Ask about any one of these things to get a conversation going. Ask more about things you're interested in, and maybe change the subject if you feel it needs to be done (at an appropriate lull in the conversation, of course). If anybody has any questions, let me know. I'd be happy to offer more information.
TLDR: Go to events even if you're unsure if you'd enjoy them. Don't be afraid to talk to people, and follow the FORD formula if you think you have nothing to talk about.
To The Rescue
[rebelmouse-image 18360164 is_animated_gif=Ive met most of my good friends in the last 3 years by becoming heavily involved in the animal rescue world. I wasn't expecting that to be the case but it just sort of happened and it's really made my social circle so much more varied and interesting
Join Up
[rebelmouse-image 18360165 is_animated_gif=I joined the Navy and I made more friends and met more new people in the past 3 years than I have ever had in my entire life. I was and am an introvert but there's something about the military where people bond over common shitty experiences and put aside differences and accept one another.
Don't Try To Meet People
[rebelmouse-image 18360166 is_animated_gif=Best advice my therapist gave me. Don't try to meet people (I'm have crazy social anxiety), but put yourself in situations where you will meet people. I took photography classes and drawing classes. Something I've always wanted to do (especially the drawing). So I wasn't meeting people I was learning to draw and asking questions and answering questions and.. << That's the way to do it.
Yay Church!
[rebelmouse-image 18360167 is_animated_gif=I can't begin to explain to you the value of the relationships I hold in my church are. I'm close with dozens of people.
Get Drunk. Look Dumb. Make Friends.
[rebelmouse-image 18360168 is_animated_gif=I'll preface by saying that I'm a guy who's nothing special to look at, and is usually pretty introverted. So, to start I put on my nicest clothes and got pretty drunk at home until I found the happy spot (where everything is great, but you're still mostly lucid) and then caught the train into town. I didn't know any places to go, so I talked to some other (drunk) people on the train and asked where they were headed. That in itself got me an invite to party with one group and I went with them to the first bar. The music at this bar was pretty heavy for me, so I made social media contact with some of the guys and wandered off.
Then I wandered into another bar with a lively pop dance floor, smashed a few drinks and embarrassed myself on the dance floor. Seriously. By looking like I was having a great time everyone assumed I was a fun person good at having a fun time. This led to some comments from people at the bar when I went to buy a drink which after a few runs turned into some decent conversations and introductions.
By this time of the night everyone was pretty lubed up and having a good time. Because I had become a conversation piece everyone kind of gravitated towards me for a convo. From there I got a few numbers and more social media contact.
Most of these contacts were never going to progress, but so far I've been to lunch once and have an upcoming drink session on the weekend. Again, I definitely got lucky, could still lead nowhere and it's not for everyone. But those are my 2 cents.
TL;DR Put on some nice clothes, get really drunk and have a great time at a bar BY YOURSELF. Others will come to you if you're fun.
Talk To Strangers
[rebelmouse-image 18360169 is_animated_gif=Go outside. Talk to strangers. Treat people well.
If you go to a coffee shop often, chat briefly with the baristas. Ask them how their shift's going. Next time, ask if they did anything fun over the weekend. Be open to sharing real information about yourself if they return the conversation. Give it a few weeks and if you've developed any chemistry, you may have found a friend.
If you have a hobby, make an effort to go out to gatherings related to it. Say hello and introduce yourself to people you meet there. Be open to sharing real information about yourself if they return the conversation. Keep going back on a relatively frequent rate. Continue talking to people. If you think they're better than you at stuff, ask about it. If they're new, offer help. Participate and people will likely ask you about stuff that you do. Nearly every great friend I've met has come from some hobby.
Anywhere outside of your home will work. Dance classes. The gym. The arcade. A book store. Foreign language practice. Volunteer work. A school board. Talk to people. Be genuine. If you like them, keep talking. If they're boring or an ass, don't keep talking. You might click instantly. It might take years before you both open up enough to realize you'll be good friends. But nothing will ever happen if you don't fucking go outside and talk to strangers.
H/T: Reddit
Men Who've Gotten A Vasectomy Share Their Experiences
Reddit user GaleNotTheWind asked: 'Men of Reddit who have gotten a vasectomy, what was your experience?'
According to the Cleveland Clinic, over 50 million men have had a vasectomy.
Although avoiding sexual intercourse is the only effective way to avoid pregnancy, the male birth control procedure still has a low failure rate.
Those who are apprehensive about having a vasectomy fear the following: pain, impact on sex life, effectiveness, and side effects like cancer. (The National Cancer Institute and the American Urological Association have found that the procedure does not increase the risk of prostate cancer).
To seek some reassurance, Redditor GaleNotTheWind asked:
"Men of Reddit who have gotten a vasectomy, what was your experience?"
Guys discuss what happened after the snipping.
Making Sure
"For the love of God, do the follow-up appointment. The last thing you want is to be accidentally playing with a loaded gun."
– sleepypanda59
Wise To Wait
"The paper work I got for mine which was done less than 2 weeks ago said that you could have sex 2-3 days after but... definitely said to wait another few days."
– SisterPhister666
Follow Post-Surgical Procedures Or Else
"Had it done twice while living in Japan no less. Why twice? The first one failed."
"... apparently, so did the second (says my now 6 year old daughter)."
– shoelessmarcelshell
These men found that the procedure itself wasn't a big deal.
Assurance
"I was super anxious, but I had a great procedure. I was more freaked out about the shot of numbing agent to the balls, but it was legit nothing to worry about."
Normal In No Time
"Little operation, blue balls and no wanking for a week, then back to normal but without getting anyone pregnant."
– Bright_Composer_3901
"Made the mistake of having a pop after a couple of days. Jesus, the regret."
– Alante
Best Money Ever Spent
"When I woke up after the anesthesia - yes I asked to be put under, best $55 (after insurance) I ever spent - the caffeine headache I had upon waking was the most painful part. The preoperative instructions were nothing but water the evening before, no water for 4 hours before going under. The Safeway brand cola that the angel aftercare nurse brought me was pure refreshment."
– HarrumphingDuck
Cherry On Top
"Local anesthesia stings for a second or two then all you can feel is tugging after all is done the pain I would describe is like blue balls for like 2 days tops. I took a week off work recommend by doctor since I’m a construction worker and the heavy lifting but I felt like after day 3 I was good to go. Cons: minor pain discomfort, no hanky panky until last semen sample came out clear. Pros: , no unplanned pregnancies(it’s still possible very rarely)."
– Secure_Requirement84
Some final thoughts.
Only Pros
"To me, the only bad part was the smell of the cauterization of my vas deferens.. the procedure was fine. Local anesthesia before and during just felt slight tugging no pain. Recovery was easy. No pain. No cons. Only pros. And if absolutely need be it’s reversible. Much easier and less invasive than a woman getting her tubes tied and significantly less harmful than birth control. I’m an advocate. Get it done!"
– PunchARacist
One Unsettling Thing
"For me, it wasn’t the smell but watching the little puffs of smoke during the cauterization. That was truly and deeply unsettling."
"Otherwise, yeah, nothing major to report. Stayed in bed for a day watching old horror movies and assembling a Lego plant. Pretty much business as usual after that."
– GuestCartographer
The One Constant
"Got a vasectomy, it worked. Got it reversed, that worked.... twice Got another vasectomy...17 years later, all good. Just go to a legit great Dr. I mean top of the field Dr. For ANY messsin around down there. Vasectomy is WAY easier now than 25-30 years ago. In/out in an hour... The only thing that hasn't changed? ... The bag of frozen peas ..😂"
– richwat00
Vasectomies are performed via two methods, the incision vasectomy or a no-scalpel vasectomy, and both use local anesthesia to numb the scrotum.
Always consult a healthcare provider before undergoing the procedure and–most importantly–make sure you don't want to have children or that you and your spouse don't want to add additional family members.
Based on the anecdotes above, there's nothing to fear, so feel free to man up and get to snipping.
The Scariest Yet Most Realistic Films About The Future Ever Made
I've always enjoyed a good scare on film and my Mother indulged my preferences as she also loved a good horror film.
While we thoroughly enjoyed a good Disney movie together, I was also allowed to watch Jaws, The Exorcist and The Omen before I was 10 years old.
Slashers and sci-fi frights were good, but to me the most effective scares involved nightmarish scenarios that might easily happen in the not so distant future.
For me, growing up Roman Catholic meant demonic possession and the AntiChrist were on the list of plausible fears.
But what films offered possible Hellscapes for others?
Reddit user beefgulash asked:
"What is the scariest—yet most realistic—future film ever made?"
Threads
"I thought that BBC’s nuclear holocaust Threads was much more terrifying and depressing than United States TV movie The Day After."
~No-Distance425
"Threads might genuinely be the most terrifying thing I’ve ever seen."
~ ThorCoolguy
Her
"Her. Everyone is so online that they lost the ability to make human connections, to the point where it's a business for the main character to write personal letters on behalf of others."
"So lonely, he easily falls in love with an AI and the only one who still feels real emotions, his ex wife (Rooney Mara), is treated like a crazy person."
"With everyone too online and severely lonely, we are practically living in that emotional dystopia now."
~ grandmofftalkin
Children of Men
"Children of Men. You want to know what makes it so scarily realistic?"
"Alfonso Cuaron deliberately shot scenes in East London and asked the production designers to make it 'more Mexican'—in other words, make it look even more run-down than it already was."
"Cuaron leaned in on his own experiences in growing up in Mexico and seeing everyday poverty to bring that to look and feel to a futuristic London. The future-London isn't a gleaming metropolis—it's a metropolis on the verge of collapse and giving up."
"The battle scenes weren't fantastical as so many sci-fi dystopian films often are: they're based on real, real conflicts. Cuaron was smart to include imagery from the then-current Iraq invasion and the atrocities committed in Abu Ghraib to jar the viewer's thoughts and attentions just long enough to make them feel queasy."
"The shots of illegal immigrants in cages were disturbing then—well, they should be f*cking frightening now. Cuaron and the production designers saturated that film with little visual snippets of then-current events and fictional future atrocities to make it a highly believable—and scary—world."
~ PureDeidBrilliant
Contagion
"Contagion—a movie about a coronavirus outbreak, that pre-dated COVID-19."
~ glrd1
"When I saw that movie in theaters, there was someone coughing a few rows behind. Like, big, wet, juicy coughs..."
"I hated that immersive movie experience."
~ only_bubble_sort
"The fast killing virus that spreads around the world was a bit unrealistic but man was it a trip watching this during lockdowns."
"I'd never heard of 'social distancing' until the pandemic and it and other pandemic facts of life coming out in the movie hit home."
~ Dmzm
A Scanner Darkly
"A Scanner Darkly. A large amount of the population have become drug addicts, the government enacts a total police state, and the addicts slowly descend into insanity, and eventually are put into rehab once their brains are fried.
"Once they are 'rehabed' (they are basically lobotomized, or brainwashed) they are sent to work on large corporate farms."
"The same corporations that own the rehabs, also own the farms, and they are also the ones growing the illicit drugs that cause the whole problem."
~ CmTrumpet
The Road
"The Road. I remember seeing the premiere of it at a film festival and the director and cast were there and all smiles and jokes and so happy to be there…and then the movie plunged all of us into pure despair for 2 hours."
~ Other-Marketing-6167
"I read the book multiple times before the movie came out."
"The movie makes your heart break, but the book destroys your soul and will to live for like a week after reading."
~ Some-Philly-Dude
WALL-E
"WALL-E. The fact that Pixar showed everyone a very real future Earth if we continue down the path we're on and nobody did anything about it speaks volumes. Everyone knows sh*t's f*cked."
"I'm rooting for the roomba with solar panels who gets outside after we've annihilated ourselves, enjoy fulfilling your set purpose lil' dude."
~ Shes_dead_Jim
Gattaca
"Gattaca. If you ever watch it again listen to how they talk about him and his 'condition'."
"It’s all 'could” and 'might' and 'possibly' and similar caveats."
"His only 'condition' was being a natural birth and not a designer baby."
~ pocket-friends
RoboCop
"RoboCop. Dude dies at work. Gets resurrected to continue working."
"Also the whole bit about corporations privatizing public services."
"Feels like we're gonna be there in a few years."
~ Gentleman_Jack90
Elysium
"Elysium strikes me as the most realistic, as far as the social structure."
"You have an ultra rich class, a mercenary type 'middle' class, and everyone else is fighting for the scraps."
~ Maliluma
"Sure seems like the logic extension of the widening global gap between a few ultra-wealthy and the rest of the population."
"The ultra-wealthy already are invested in space travel, colonizing Mars, island compounds and extreme longevity."
~ RichardBonham
Logan's Run
"Logan's Run, it's a bit of a cult classic."
"In the future, there are limited places for humans to live, so everyone has an 'expiration date' regardless of how healthy they are."
"Everyone has to die before a certain age. I won't spoil it in case anyone wants to see it."
"It's an old school sci-fi movie that I have loved since I was a kid."
~ macmac360
12 Monkeys
"No one mentioned 12 Monkeys yet?"
"Found it super realistic and scary."
~ mrs_anouk
Soylent Green
"Soylent Green solves both problems of overpopulation and food scarcity.... so, maybe it will happen."
"I just hope they think of 3rd Degree Burn Scorchin' Habanero Soylent Green when they do it."
~ ketchuptheclown
Metropolis
"Metropolis. Complete masterpiece in my opinion."
~ CaptianOfCows
Idiocracy
"Idiocracy."
~ BrilliantlyClueless
"I like to believe that somewhere in that world a pocket of smart people retreated to someplace isolated like New Zealand and persisted."
~ notapunk
Zombies! 🧟♂️🧟♀️🧟
Personally, I love zombie movies based on the concept from George A. Romero's classic Night Of The Living Dead.
Zombies existed in myths and legends before Romero's film, but not in the way they do now in popular culture.
Romero's movies also always included social commentary on economic inequality, racism and the ills of unbridled capitalism.
To me zombie films show how people would react in a viral health crisis and our recent pandemic made them all the more real.
So what movies do you think are scary because they're too real?
The Worst Reasons Cheaters Have Given To Justify Their Infidelity
Infidelity in marriages isn't as widespread as people think. While some cynics would have us believe faithful partners are scarce, they account for over 4 out of 5 spouses.
Still, 16% of married couples in the United States admitted to being unfaithful at some point in their marriage.
And 57% of divorces were due to cheating.
In marriages where infidelity occurs, but doesn't result in divorce, the loss of trust is still a problem. It can make emotional and physical intimacy challenging.
So why do people cheat instead of ending their relationship before moving on?
Reddit user littlehoneybear2104 asked:
"What is the worst reason you've heard for cheating on someone?"
What's Old Is New Again
"He wanted to try something new."
"He cheated on me with his ex."
~ meeez80
GiphyPreemptive Strike
"Just in case he would ever cheat on me, I cheated first, so it's his fault for possibly cheating on me in the first place."
~ Competitive_Bat4986
Mission Accomplished
"To have a reason to end the relationship."
~ chewie_33
Tough Enough
"He said I'm strong and I can handle it."
"Like WTF? Does that give someone a free pass just to cheat?"
"Like we ain't tolerating that too. Done with that person."
~ drn-07
GiphyDream On
"Ex cheated on me because I cheated on her in a dream shehad and she was sure it was a sign that I was unfaithful in real life."
~ Craigothy-YeOldeLord
Oops!
"It was an accident."
"Yeah, 'I tripped and fell into her vagina' sounds legit."
~ dabbad525
GiphyGrow Up
"You didn’t show me enough attention the past few years! You didn’t take me anywhere! I’m the baby in my family, I need attention!”
"I worked 3 jobs, played with the kids, and finished a degree… during COVID while EVERYWHERE was closed."
~ hephaestus1219
Lockdown
"I was together with her for 14 years, married for 6 and this dipsh*t said we stagnated for a year during COVID because we didn’t go out anywhere...because she was deathly afraid of COVID."
"Some people are so pathetically stupid."
~ Virgin_nerd
GiphyUnsupervised
"My best friend in high school/college claimed it was my fault she cheated on her boyfriend because I left them in the room alone together with the she cheated with."
~ Smart_Form_9569
Too Perfect?
"My ex said it was because I was 'too perfect' and that he couldn't live up to the standard I had set by being who I was."
~ MarvelousShiggyDiggy
Trauma Response
"My cousin’s ex said she felt she had to hook up with the guy working the front register at Walgreens because of the events of 9-11."
"I’m not even kidding. This was on 9-11."
"She apparently was so upset she staggered into Walgreens and fell on the first guy she saw."
~ Big_Psychology_4210
In The Stars
"My ex cheated on me because 'August has new energy'—something to do with astrology. And yes, I mean the month August, not someone named August."
~ Frog-Thing
Giphy*yawn* 🥱
"The relationship just got boring"
"Their marriage seemed perfect inside and out, except she got bored of being a wife and mother."
"She tried fighting for the marriage after her affair partner died of a heart attack and husband called her out on her bullsh*t."
~ DevilinDeTales
Some people aren't meant for commitment, but that should be something they disclose to their partners before they cheat.
It would avoid a lot of wasted time and heartbreak.
When it comes to flirting, everyone has their preferences of how they like to be flirted with. Some people like cleverly crafted pickup lines.
I always thought pickup lines were a cheap way to get someone's attention. That being said, there are some good ones out there. I've been on the receiving end of both. "On a scale from one to America, how free are you tonight?" and, "You must be the square root of two because I feel irrational around you."
Both got me to engage in conversation, and I even dated the guy who used the first one for a while.
I'm not the only one that knows some good pickup lines. Redditors have both heard and used some pickup lines and are eager to share their favorites.
It all started when Redditor Sauce_Dealer420 asked:
"What's the best pickup line of all time?"
Read It And See
"You put the sexy in dyslexic."
– koookyko
"This made me laugh so hard."
"Because I can read properly."
– TappedIn2111
I'm Hooked
"This girl I used to work with and I went to a bar after work and we’re having fun, and she leans over to tell me a joke. And she says:"
"Three boy mice and a girl mouse were all stuck in a room with no doors and no windows. One of the boy mice asked the girl mouse how to get out and she said, “Sleep with me tonight, and I’ll tell you in the morning.""
"The next day, he is gone. The second boy mouse asks the girl mouse how he got out and she says, “Sleep with me tonight, and I’ll tell you in the morning.""
"Next day, he’s gone too."
"So now the girl telling me this joke says to me, “Do you want to know how the last mouse gets out of the box?”
"And I say “yes.""
"And she says, “Sleep with ME tonight, and I’ll tell you in the morning”. All this while staring me in the eyes and smiling."
"I said, “Check please bartender!!""
"I forgot to ask her in the morning, but that was the best pickup line I’ve ever heard."
– reb678
Statistics
"The odds we sleep together are 50% because half of us agree so far."
– AlfheimKitteh
"Math is always super sexy."
– Acceptable-News-6811
Money, Money, Money
"Hey girl, are you the English financial system? Because I'm about to give you a weak pound."
– onemanwolfpack21
"Yo girl, do you know exchange rates? Because Euro 10."
– kkirchhoff
Winner, Winner
""Are you a magician? Cuz every time I look at you, everyone else disappears.""
"This line got me a wife and three kids. 😊"
– PRSHZ
One Liners
"Are you a beaver? Cuz damn."
– Starry_Night-
"If you were a fruit you'd be a fineapple."
– Slainna
"Hi, do you want to go for a ride on a Harley?"
"(My name is Harley) 😁"
– OMNIxvTRIX
No Losers
"If I asked you for a date would the answer to that question be the same as the answer to this question?"
– SchemePale6222
"I got blue screen in my head."
"Explain please."
– TastyToothpasta
"You can't lose. Say no, the answer is yes. Say yes, the answer is also yes."
"Dang sounds kinda creepy writing it out like that. Still clever wordplay though."
– Steeze_Schralper6968
Clever
"My go-to was always:"
"I used to be a history teacher, so I know lots of important dates. Want to help me make another one?"
"A little corny, but it usually worked."
– StuffToday
Refreshing
"That one actually worked with my ex on the first try."
"-Hey, do you like water?"
"-Yes."
"-Then you like me in 70% already."
– azurskyy
Sneaky
"Would you date a complete stranger?"
"If she says “yes” you’re in."
If she says “no.”
“Then allow me to introduce myself.”"
– Blastspark01
Playing Coy
"Once a girl came to me and told there was somebody who thought I was cute."
"I asked her who and she said “Me.""
– evil_boy4life
Prop Lines
"You have to have a handful of limes available to do this:"
"Hold the limes, drop the limes in front of the lucky person. Then say 'Sorry, I'm not very good at pick up limes.'"
– cannibalcats
Egg-cellent
"Best one that worked for me was:"
"Me: How do you like your eggs?"
"Her: Over easy, why?"
"Me: Just making sure I have things right for when I make you breakfast in the morning."
– Radiant_Boss4342
The Best Line
"How you doin?"
– 2x4x93
"There was a time when this was the ONLY line you could use!"
– JohnsLong_Silver
That line would definitely work on me!