Everyone has insecurities.
Be it speaking in public, wearing beach attire, or even one's profession, very few people don't have at least one topic of conversation that is bound to make them red in the face.
Some people are pretty adept at hiding their discomfort and can manage to persevere through their phobias with their dignity intact.
Others are not so lucky and often go to great lengths to hide their insecurities, only to make them even more apparent.
Redditor Dear_Coyote_ was eager to learn the tell-tale signs of someone's insecurities, leading them to ask:
"What screams 'I’m insecure'?"
The Wisest People Are Those Always Willing To Learn
"When people are unable to admit that they don’t know something."- slimytoads
not listening no way GIFGiphyOther People's Success Are Not Your Failures
"Mocking someone else's achievement."- SuvenPan
Never Pick Yourself Up By Taking Others Down
"Belittling others."- Term-Haunting
"Always talking badly about others and trying to make them look weak/bad."- Pildith
The Simpsons GIF by MOODMANGiphyMaybe Honesty Isn't Always The Best Policy...
"When you're quick to be 'brutally honest' with others, but have a meltdown when someone does it back to you."-eF240uKX52hp
Not As Funny As They Think...
"People who tear other people down as a joke but then get mad when they get it handed back to them."
"Clearly they either aren’t joking or are too sensitive to be dishing out sh*t."- babythrottlepop
Being On Top Adds More Possibilities Of Falling Down...
"Trying to one-up people in every conversation."- Flanky_Bwai
"One upping people in conversation."
"If I tell you I had a great trip to X place, I don’t need to hear about your better trip to someplace else that’s ostensibly 'better'."- I_Am_The_Grapevine
kristen wiig television GIF by Saturday Night LiveGiphySome Things Speak For Themselves...
"Constantly saying what kind of person you are."
"If you were, you wouldn’t have to tell us."- ubereddit
A Little Contrition Goes A Long Way...
"Never apologizing."
"Making excuses and even twisting the facts but never apologize."- SuvenPan
But Enough About Me, What Do You Think Of Me?
"Constant projection and self-serving compliments."- nhabz
Look At Me Kiki GIF by The Bachelor AustraliaGiphyWhat Are They Even Trying To Prove?
"Revving your vehicle loudly every time you pass another person."- msnmck
Superior By Association
“'You will address me by my husband’s rank!'”- Psychological-Stay16
PDA Much?
"Elaborate Instagram and Facebook posts declaring love for one’s significant other over and over and over."- jbmaun
Happy Married At First Sight GIF by LifetimeGiphyAlways Needing Validation
"People who can’t think or feel anything without being told that it’s okay to do so."- Diesel07012012
It's sad that so many people think the only way to overcome something which makes them embarrassed or afraid is by embarrassing or demeaning others.
When being open and honest about your insecurities might, instead, result in your finding common ground with others.
And making new, lifelong friends in the process.
Redditor Sinaasappelsien was hoping certain people would share some of their most difficult inner thoughts, so they asked:
"Those with ADHD or OCD, what’s the worst intrusive thought you’ve ever had?"
I don't have either symptom, but I can empathize.
Intrusive thoughts haunt us all and it's a lot to take in.
Consent
Jim Carrey Reaction GIF by LaffGiphy"Maybe you're in a 'Truman Show' type situation, what would you want your audience to hear?"
"The answer now is mostly 'I do not consent to be in a 'Truman Show type situation.' I'm 99.9% sure that's not what's happening, BUT I do still say it out loud every once in a while, just in case."
a**hat123
Painful Details
"I tend to imagine injuries in excruciating detail. One time when I was in college, working in the kitchen, I remember walking past an industrial-sized mixer with a dough hook as big as my arm, and I was immediately hit with the image of my leg getting caught in it, and the force of the motor snapping my knee and leg bones and winding my flesh around the shaft until it shredded and tore free - like when you're trying to break the hip joint to get a leg off of a roast chicken."
iglidante
Sick to my stomach...
"I've had some absolutely abhorrent and terrifying intrusive thoughts that torture me all the time. My therapist told me that intrusive thoughts are your brain trying to purge the things you find absolutely disgusting and awful and I try to remember that but it still makes me sick to my stomach. I cope the best I can but torture really is the best descriptor for experiencing consistent intrusive thoughts."
bathmaster_
Unfazed
"I have Excoriation disorder, which is a type of OCD, and what it means is that if I see any kind of spot on my skin, I pick at it until it’s gone. And what I mean when I say 'pick' is that I will find whatever sharp object there is (my preferred object is thumbtacks) and I will dig until I’m satisfied that it’s gone. It could be 5 minutes, it could be 5 hours."
"Pain doesn’t faze me. Blood doesn’t faze me. I have dug down to the bone before with a thumbtack because I thought there was a lump in my pinky finger. I also have a severe anxiety disorder, which means that if I can’t get 'out' whatever I believe is in my skin, I have a panic attack. It isn’t to self-harm- I don’t do it to hurt myself."
"I just do it because I can’t relax until I get out whatever I think is on/in my skin. I haven’t had a severe picking episode in about 9 months, thanks to really good meds and mental health care. But yeah- without that, the intrusive thought that 'something is in there and I HAVE to get it out' would destroy me."
MPD1987
Again and Again
Britney Spears Reaction GIFGiphy"Along with intrusive thoughts is the intrusive music. All the time never stops. Just broken snippets, 'Oops I did it again, oops I did it again, oops I did it again' over and over til I think I’m going mad!!!"
Jeansiesicle
Random music in the brain.
I've been kept up nights over the music.
And there is no volume dial.
WTF?!
Dying Classic Film GIF by Warner ArchiveGiphy"I get one regularly that’s a vivid image of me digging out the artery in my wrist with a fish hook and then snapping it like a rubber band."
canijustbelancelot
Bed Check
"If my bedroom isn't clean or tidy when I lay down to sleep, I picture bugs, rodents, etc climbing over me in bed. Not far off because my last condo building had such a bad mouse infestation. Ugh. I'm itchy just thinking about it now."
crankyoldhag45
"I have to check my room every night for spiders, the same routine every night no matter how tired I am. I hate it. I'm convinced if I don't check, it'll be the one night a big one crawls on me, and that did happen once, so the compulsion to check is now very much set in stone. :( "
sakura_gasaii
Reminders
"I love getting constant reminders about my absolute worst memories, ranging from 'WTF was I thinking' to redeem now for a free panic attack. I considered typing one out but stared at that last full stop for a minute before snapping out of it and reconsidering lol. I’ve gotten very good at forgetting things. It’s for the best."
Arterra
Bad Attacks
"I've been getting bad claustrophobia attacks on the train lately. The moment it gets too crowded I start thinking about the trains to Auschwitz and how the people were trapped in there for days at a time, squeezed in like sardines, with no bathroom breaks, no room to stretch, freezing or sweltering, starving or panicking or dying... Sorry. You asked."
Wazula23
Rituals
I Hope Please GIFGiphy"I have to pray before bed or my father won't wake up the next morning."
No_Scale7584
"OCD rituals hit hard. I hope it doesn’t cause you too much distress, but I understand how exhausting it can be."
StillExpectations
Our thoughts can really be our enemy.
If you suffer some intrusive thoughts, there are plenty of medical resources out there for you. .
"Redditors in a relationship, how do you feel about your partner having full access to your phone such as text messages, photos, your apps, everything?"
Context Is Everything
"I wouldn't care unless the openness was only one way or constantly being used as a tool to constantly unsuccessfully prove I'm being unfaithful."- varthalon
"It's strange because i wouldn't care if someone looked through my phone, I have nothing to hide."
"BUT someone demanding that they can look through it is a massive red flag."- BunnyMcRabbitson
Red Flag Nascar GIF by Richard Childress RacingGiphyMeh...
"I don't care."
"There's nothing there."
"I can get on her phone, too."
"But I don't want to."
"Being married 40+ years does that to you, I guess."- mike11172
"Been married 33 yrs."
"My husband can access everything if he wants."
"I don't care in the least."
"Not much to see."- chalisa0
"I don't care if my husband looks through my phone, emails or whatever else."- galactictictac·
so what who cares tv show GIFGiphyGo Right Ahead
"Sure."
"Worst she'll find in my dumb searches."- Iisham
Nothing To Worry About
"My partner and I have each other's passwords but don't go through each other's stuff because he's always had an iPhone, I've always had an Android, and we don't know how to work the other OS."- abominable-ho-man
"The hell they gonna find, pictures of our cats?"
"Have at 'er..."- miffy495
Cats Ducking GIF by MOODMANGiphyCouldn't Stop Him If They Tried...
"He knows all my passwords."- LunaTic0922
Allow It? I Encourage It!
"My husband has full access to my phone and my passwords and I have full access to his."
"I would trust him with my life without any hesitation, I definitely don’t mind knowing that he has access to my phone."- Hekatevenstar
"Not a problem."
"I don't keep secrets and my sweetie isn't the jealous type."- Xylorgos
Good Night Hug GIF by JinGiphyHard No!
"I don't allow it."
"My friends and family occasionally tell me things in confidence that my husband doesn't need to know."- feral_hippie
"I consider it to be a red flag."
"Now, you might think 'Well if you're not doing anything wrong, then you have nothing to hide from your partner', right?"
"However, that doesn't invalidate my privacy."
"Not every little conversation and every little interaction has to be up for review."
"It also speaks to going into a relationship with an immense lack of trust or faith, which leads me to wonder why you'd engage with someone else to begin with."- MenagerieMiyamoto
"Married over 20 years."
"F*ck that."
"If I can't have some measure of privacy then I'd rather be alone."- Southernerd
No No No GIFGiphySharing Is Caring
"He's my partner it's fine, I see no issue."
"I'm not acting weird or crazy or creating some kind of suspicious environment to where we're snooping in each other's phones."
"The best thing about having nothing to hide, your brain can relax, you don't need to lie and you can."
"Leave things where you set then and not worry, like a phone on the table instead of carrying it all the time."- Hachimon1479
If there's anyone who one should feel free to share absolutely anything and everything with, it's their romantic partner.
Even so, everyone has a right to privacy, and everyone has the right to fill their phone with whatever content they like, without judgment or stress.