People Share Subtle Signs That Someone Isn't A Good Person
Usually when we meet someone for the first time whether at a social function, at work, or randomly in public, we generally have a good Spidey sense about the type of person they are.
Even with alcohol in the mix, our instincts can be dulled but we still continue engaging with someone who seems outgoing and friendly enough at the bar.
But we also have the ability to tell right away if that person doesn't have good intentions.
Curious to hear of possible identifiers signaling that someone is suspicious, Redditor PsychologicalPop8776 asked:
"What is a subtle sign someone isn’t a good person?"
These familiar types of behavior really shows a person's true colors.
It Works Both Ways
"They believe that respect is earned but demand it immediately from you."
Prelude To A Diss
"Or, conversely, when they love to constantly say 'With all due respect' right before they disrespect someone."
A World Of Their Own
"Someone who is incapable of reflecting. They are the centre of their own universe. They are unable to grasp the big picture or how they fit within it. Everyone has a place in the larger picture, which is their small view of the world."
"They share private information about others with you."
"Casual unnecessary lying."
Saying "sorry" is too much for some people to say.
Passing On Responsibility
"Not owning up to their mistakes and always attributing it to someone or something else."
"My mom's famous line when caught doing something wrong 'Well, I didn't know' instead of 'I'm sorry.'"
"Obligatory posting of The Narcissist's Prayer:"
'That didn’t happen.
And if it did, it wasn’t that bad.
And if it was, that’s not a big deal.
And if it is, that’s not my fault.
And if it was, I didn’t mean it.
And if I did, you deserved it.'
Sometimes, it's the visible signals that indicate what kind of person someone is.
"Littering. It's not a violent act or anything, but it does indicate a lack of respect that usually carries into other aspects of the person's life."
"Yes. Watched a guy stick his gum on the underside of the bar and instantly knew we wouldn’t be going on another date."
Parking Lot Protocol
"Yes, kinda along the same lines of people who don’t return their grocery cart. That lack of respect."
Communicating With Drivers
"I feel the same way about a number of things people do when driving, specifically using your turn signal. The use of your signal lets other drivers (and sometimes pedestrians) know your intent - allowing them to better anticipate your actions. Not using it indicates you are only thinking about yourself...which is probably how you live the rest of your life."
I was in a packed movie theater once when I saw a woman sitting by herself. She wasn't waiting on anyone but she still saved a seat on either side of her.
When a couple entered her row, one of them politely asked if it would be cool if the woman moved down one seat so she could sit together with her boyfriend.
The woman said, "No" and stayed in her seat. I could hear a chorus of snickers from other audience members witnessing this.
Shocked, the girlfriend said, "Really? You're a horrible person."
Yeah, sounds about right.
Throughout the entire movie, the couple–who wound up flanking the woman on either side of her in their respective seats–kept passing the popcorn bucket to each other right in front of the woman.
In addition to the movie, this was a satisfying plot line to watch.
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People Share Their Family's Biggest Unsolved Mysteries
Everyone keeps secrets from their families.
Most of the time, these are fairly trivial in the grand scheme of things, like accidentally breaking a window with a baseball but blaming it on a fallen branch, or claiming the dog ruined your mother's favorite pair of shoes when you actually wore them for a grand night out.
Some people, however, are better at keeping secrets than others, and often take these secrets with them to the grave.
In doing so, however, they still might leave behind a trail of breadcrumbs, which will leave their surviving family members with a slew of unanswered questions, which will likely remain unanswered.
Even if people will forever continue to do their best to solve what these clues actually mean.
"What's your family's unsolved mystery?"
Something Is Definitely Fishy...
"The day my father died from a car accident involving a boat trailer In the middle of nowhere out of state in 1991, my mom found a box with a Chinese medicine ball with a bell inside and a letter that said, 'I am sorry'."
"It was in our mailbox."
"She found it before she got the call that my father had died."
"The first autopsy on my father said there was a high blood alcohol content."
"My mom demanded a second autopsy, and there was no alcohol in him."
"She had seen him less than hour before he died and he hadn't been drinking that morning."
"My father was a third party candidate for state governor and published an independent newspaper talking about corrupt politicians and organizations."- neurotica_9000
Save Your Pennies...
"When my great-great-uncles house was to be torn down, they found old money hidden EVERYWHERE, even in the floor and the walls."
"Nobody knows where he had all that money from."- Imaginary_Town3642
Whatever Happened To Alice?
"In England around 1880 my 3x great grandmother received a letter from her daughter."
"She read it, threw it in the fire and said 'she’s made her bed, she’ll have to lie in it'.”
"My 2x ggmother never knew what happened to her sister Alice and later immigrated to the US."
"A couple years ago an unknown DNA relative from that branch reached out on Ancestry."
"She’s mixed race with Jamaican roots but doesn’t have clear written family records."
"I suspect that we’re connected through Alice."- EmmeryAnn
He's Out There Somewhere
"Who is my maternal grandfather?"
"The name on my mom's birth certificate is the guy my grandmother was married to at the time but military records show that he was out of the country when my mom would've been conceived."
"DNA also backs this up."
"Sadly, none of my close DNA matches will respond to me."- agreeingstorm9
Safe To Say, He Was Up To No Good
"What my great uncle got up to after he disappeared to Mexico in the early 80s."
"Great Uncle was a fairly unstable individual."
"Rough childhood, shipped off to Vietnam."
"Came back, got a wife and had a son."
"Got heavily involved with organized crime in the city my family is from."
"Became very abusive to his wife and my cousin."
"Wife takes cousin and leaves him."
"Great Uncle spends next several years chasing them."
"FBI eventually gets involved, and he just ups and disappears."
"We find out he had gone to Mexico when, 16 years later, my Grandmother gets a call from his daughter saying that he had passed away."
"The fact that he had apparently been not only alive the entire time, but had also started another family was a surprise."
"My cousin, despite everything, decided he should attend the funeral in Mexico."
"At the viewing, he tells us that two well dressed guys pull up in a Town Car, approach the casket, snap a quick picture of my deceased great uncle, and leave."
"Without having said a single word to anyone."
"We have a lot of questions."- Ok_Counter_4610
What They Don't Know, Won't Hurt Them...
"An intentionally unsolved one to make you laugh."
"When I was say 10 I hated cutting the grass, we had a brutally steep hill and it was never fun."
"Our lawn mower had gotten old and hard to start, so a brilliant kid idea came to me, sabotage!"
"Now I was no slacker here, I thought it through."
"I carefully pulled the starter cord out about halfway and frayed it so that it was just half cut."
"Then I went inside and told my Stepfather I could not start it."
'He naturally enough went outside to show me that I could and was just being lazy."
"The be fair I was but the cord lasted about three hard pulls before snapping, which led to the air turning blue from the cursing."
"This was apparently such a frustrating thing that we ended up with a brand new self-propelled, mower, a huge success."
"Fast forward 20 years and when this story was finally told by my sister it was not believed."
"He insisted that it broke because it was a pile of garbage, he was there after all! "
"I could only laugh at this."
"I think he believes to this day I could not have pulled that off."- bullwinkle8088
A Likely Story...
"What my grandfather actually did in the military."
"He said he was an accountant, that he wrote paychecks."
"But we also know for a fact he spoke Russian, was a crack shot with a rifle, to the point when I was in JROTC doing the shooting drills he warned me to miss a few times on purpose, because crack shots get made into snipers, and snipers don't live long, and we discovered after his death that 'was an accountant' is an extremely common cover story."- Edymnion
Her Own Fault For Leaving It Unattended
"Someone took a chunk out of aunt Eliza's pumpkin pie when nobody was around at our family thanksgiving back in 1994 and they still do not let the subject go to this day."
"Anyways It was me and I can never tell them."- blackmobius
Always Two Steps Ahead Of Everybody
"My Grandmother used to answer, old-school rotary, phones before they rang and there was always someone on the line."
"She would also tell us to go open the door for family and friends seconds to minutes before they were even in sight of the house."
"She was an extraordinary lady."- Poopybut58
Gone Without A Trace
"My great-grandfather was said to have up and disappeared one day."
"No signs of it beforehand, he was only 70 and still very active, was still involved in the business, and all of the extended family was living in the same area."
"Even more surprising was that in that small town where most people knew him, nobody even noticed him leave."
"My grandma still cries on his birthdays and on the anniversary of the day he disappeared."
"He was very well loved."
"This was way back in 1985, suburban India."- LiveInTheFlow
There is little more frustrating than not having closure.
Then again, there's a reason why "ignorance is bliss", leaving one to wonder if certain mysteries should remain unsolved.
Every new generation thinks they know best.
And every older generation thinks they've seen and done it all.
It's a neverending cycle.
So how do we make one generation listen to another?
And can the generation imparting important advice give it with ease and not arrogance?
Nobody wants to be disrespected.
Can we all start there?
Redditor baker10923 wanted hear what information the young people want the old people to stop yelling about, so they asked:
"Younger people of reddit. What are you tired of hearing from older generations?"
I'm tired of hearing about the music. Madonna is music.
I will say these kids today though... THAT'S MUSIC?!
We Know BestClap Magenta GIF by Telekom erlebenGiphy
“I have more life experience than you… 'then proceeds to go on an emotionally stunted rant based on their own personal bias due to trauma they refuse to process because 'they know best.'"
"Literally any and all job advice. Sorry, Deborah, but you've worked the same unionized position for 30+ years. The number of valuable insights you can give me about the modern labor landscape numbers somewhere between diddly and squat. And Hank literally drops the 'walk downtown handing out resumes and shaking hands" line without awareness or irony.'"
What we went through
"My mom and I got into a fight over housing affordability. 'Your father (55)and I (53) worked very hard to afford this house (175k) and you make more than we did at the time we bought (1992).'"
"The house now is worth about 1.5m, my mom didn't work and my dad made 100k/year. I make 150k and houses in my price range are 600k 1hr+ away from where I want to be and less than half size with less than half the lot."
"Anything to the effect of 'young people can't have back pain (or any other physical disability).' Like, dude, I wish being in my twenties made me immune to being injured. But that's literally just not how the human body works."
"Yup. In my 20s also and I have severe back and neck pain from a car accident. Any time I mention that Im hurting (which is all the time but I only say something when its so bad I cant move) I'm dramatic or too young to know real pain."
I'm ThemAging Jamie Lee Curtis GIFGiphy
"I am 44 but I still feel like I am young. I am tired of hearing pretty much everything my generation says. I don't understand when everybody else just suddenly morphed into their parents."
Oh the generations, always the drama.
AwfulNew Girl Facepalm GIF by HULUGiphy
"They're so judgemental and rude. I'm a restaurant worker and I swear young people are way more polite and easy going while older people have zero patience (even though they're the ones who are already retired), oftentimes make racist, sexist, homophobic and bodyshaming comments and still act like they're above the younger generation simply because they've been alive for longer."
29 and Up
"As a 29 year old, tired of older people telling me I’ll understand joint pain, tiredness when I’m older. I’m disabled and chronically ill. I have had bad joints since birth. Like it’s great that all your health problems are a result of your age but mine have been around and will worsen because of that."
blah blah blah...
"(34) I'm sick of hearing about how young people just spend all their time on Tik Tok. How they have stupid dances. How they're just staring at screens all day, blah blah blah."
"Yes, they do all that stuff, but we had stupid dances when we were younger. We sat in front of the TV all day. I've yet to see someone with square eyes."
"Also, hearing about how kids/young people today have no respect for their elders. MF's were doing the same sh*t that people today are doing now. The difference is, everyone has a camera in their pocket."
"'No one wants to work anymore.'"
"First of all no one ever wanted to work. That's why it's called, 'work,' and not 'fun.'"
"Second of all, maybe it's that no one wants to work at your job that lists itself as entry level but wants 5 years of experience and a master's degree along with being able to work 12 hour days at minimum wage."
BasicsListen Mothers Day GIF by Cartoon HangoverGiphy
"Go to school, get a job, get married, have kids, retire, then die..."
How will we bridge this gap?
One only knows.
People Who Were Forced To Choose Between Their Pet And Their Partner Explain What Happened
Our pets are part of the family.
Any person who doesn't get that is not someone I can know.
They are there through it all.
They help with the good, the bad and the ugly.
So when it comes to choosing between a pet and a person... the answer can make things awkward.
Redditor sugar-soad wanted to know how everyone would choose between a lover and a fur baby, so they asked:
"People who were made to choose between your pet or your partner, how did your ex react when you chose your pet?"
One of my exes wanted me to return my dog to the pound.
Notice I said... EX?
The lovecat dog GIFGiphy
"It really baffles me how some people don't understand how much a pet can mean to someone, I remember one of my dogs dying overnight before a school day at secondary school and my teacher mouthed off to the class about me taking a day off for a pet's death."
"This was a long time ago but I just started dating this person and I was told they hated my dog, it was a bit of a shock but I was like no biggie just get to know my dog and you will fall in love with him."
"So the next time, we had a doggie date and HE TRIED TO KICK MY DOG. I literally grabbed my dog and turned around and walked away. And that was that!!!"
"This is my favorite story from when I worked in a shelter. A guy came in to surrender his cat, with the reason that his girlfriend didn't like her. He starts filling out the paperwork, but partway through he just stops and says, 'Screw this. I'm just going to break up with her instead.' He picks up the cat and walks out the door, presumably to leave his GF. I hope he stuck to it and he and his cat got a happy ending."
"Not directly relevant, but we once took in a dog, whose human was asked to make this choice. Beautiful weimaraner. The guy brought the dog out to our house (on a hill in the woods with acres to roam - dogs absolutely love it out here - and we spent some time walking around letting the dog get used to the place and meet our other furry residents."
"We could tell it was really hard on both of them when he left."
"The next day he kicked the woman out, and came back for the dog. Happy ending all around, I'd say."
MomentosDog What GIF by Best Friends Animal SocietyGiphy
"Not my story but my friend. His GF forced him to choose between her or dog but that dog was remaining memento from his deceased mother and of course he instantly dumped his GF. His GF went from facefull with expectations to beet red full of shame and anger and smashed his house windows when she left his house."
Never asked for someone to make choice between a person and a pet.
Living LongerCats Reaction GIF by TikTok MENAGiphy
"I remember him saying my diabetic cat needed to go so he could get a dog. We weren't even living together. I looked him dead in the eyes and said. 'My cat will outlive this relationship' considering she was really sick at the time he said it was unlikely and stormed off. We broke up 6 years ago and my cat is still going strong."
"I have an elderly rat (going on four years, which is quite the feat for a rat). I’ve raised him since he was a baby with his brother, who passed away two winters ago. When we moved in with my in-laws over the summer, they didn’t want me to bring my rat. I straight up told my partner that I’ll live somewhere else for awhile (we’d been living together for almost three years at that point) because my rat is my responsibility."
"He’s very old, and that I was going to see him through to the end. They were a little upset and accused me of choosing the rat over them, but I explained that he’s an animal that relies on us. It worked out, I convinced my in-laws to let me bring him, and we’re all still kickin. He’s on his last days and I’m glad I’m here with him. He’ll be buried with his brother when it’s time."
"She acted like she'd never even considered I'd choose the cat over her. I don't think that thought had ever entered her mind. Then she went into a big spiel about how I'm a loser, I'm missing out, there's only one of her, etc etc. Yeah, I knew all that when I put my foot down over her idiotic jealousy of the cat liking me more than her."
"The cat is now 16 and still with me, happy in her senior years. There's been other women since her, ones that treated me a lot better than she did. It was a total win for both the cat and myself."
"Not me but my sister choose our cat over her boyfriend of 4 months. He was furious when she dumped him and called her an idiot for picking a 'dirty fleabag' over him. Cat was not a dirty fleabag, he just hated pets and wanted to try to control my sister. I was relieved when she dumped him. I never got good vibes from him."
BYEWhite Dog GIFGiphy
"My ex asked me if she thought my dog liked me or her more and I said me. She got genuinely mad and told me I am supposed to just lie to her, didn't last long."
Pets will always win.
Have you ever had to make a similar choice? Let us know in the comments below.
As adults, whenever you see teenagers being boisterous or rough-housing others, we tend to roll our eyes and move, chalking it up to youth.
I don't know about you, but when I was younger, in high school, I felt invincible and acted accordingly with my classmates without a care in the world.
But there is such a thing as going too far, and even teens who know better, generally know when they've overstepped a boundary.
Curious to hear of those instances, Redditor Silent-Zebra asked strangers online to reflect back on their youth.
"What's something that a friend/classmate did in high school that was seen as funny at the time, but you now realise was actually not ok?"
The cruelty of these students showed no bounds.
Why An Elevator Was Installed
"Had a kid in my year who'd had a surgery that left a nerve bundle in his neck exposed. If pressed it would paralyse him. From memory it was for spina bifida and for some ungodly reason he told everyone."
"Certain boys took great pleasure in going down stairs behind him and pressing it which completely paralysed him for a few seconds and he'd fall like a brick. Usually onto whoever was in front of him."
"So dangerous. There were a fair few teeth knocked out because of this, his and other people's."
"It happened so much that in his 3rd year the school installed an elevator and you had to have a special key to use it. He got the only permanent issue key at that time."
"Kids are a**holes."
Teachers Are People Too
"In the 6th grade, I had a friend who was a troublemaker and a class-clown. I’ve always hated going to my math class because my teacher was a cranky old lady who’d yell at you for the smallest things. Me being an 11-year old, I actually had the worst anxiety just knowing I could be the next person yelled at in front of the class. The one thing that helped get through the year was that friend cause I knew he’d always make jokes and have me almost in tears cause they were that funny."
"One day, when my teacher walked out to use the bathroom, that friend went over to her desk, picked up the mug she was drinking out of, and spat out the biggest loogie into it. We all saw it and just waited for her to come back. 10 mins later, as she was just normally teaching, she picks up her mug and chugs it down. Everybody just starts laughing and giggling, including me, but nobody said anything when she questioned it. It was horrible but I wasn’t about to be the kid who snitched."
"Later on during the school year, I guess we had a day where it didn’t start at the normal 7:30am but instead 10:30am, but I didn’t know so I showed up really early. A bunch of kids didn’t get the memo so we were all just placed in the cafeteria until school actually started. Around 9ish, my math teacher noticed I was sitting out in the cold and invited me to her class where it was warm. When I got there, she let me work on my missed homework and even let me eat breakfast in her class. She asked me about home life, school life, if I had any friends, etc. she made me feel welcome. She then told me about her life, about her only son, about her husband who passed away from cancer 20 years back. She was very sweet."
"This was like back in 2008, and I think she was like 70 years old. I don’t even know if she’s still alive after all these years. But I wish I could go back and stop my 'friend' from doing what he did. :("
Imprisoning The Teacher
"Our religion teacher went into the cupboard for supplies, she was quite strict and not liked but now I’m an adult I realise it doesn’t excuse what happened next. The class clown snuck up and locked her in the cupboard. We all thought it was hilarious at the time and we all left the class. She was in there for the rest of the class until another teacher found her in there crying an hour later. She took 2 weeks off after that"
Adults later realized the severity of some bad behavior back in the day.
"Few messed up kids in my primary school lit a teachers car on fire, just because she gave one of them failing grade on midterm. It wasn't one of the mean teachers, she was mostly nice to students. Cops got involved but don't think they got punished accordingly, i know one of them was in and out of juvie already, and were all around 13- 14yr old, one was even in nazi sh*t. I know later on those kids got all tangled in dealing and robberies, probably all went to jail at some point."
"In our school there was a teacher who had a mole, so of course the kids decided her nickname would now be 'mole.' She must have felt really hurt, as she eventually had the mole removed, leaving a little dent where it used to be. Did everyone then stop calling her names? Nope. They started calling her 'hole' instead."
"this was in elementary: my dad bought a brand new bike for me and i rode it to the park and these older kids came up to me and asked if one of them could take it for a test drive. i said ok and about 10 seconds in, i see the guy riding my bike being pushed off and my bike being stolen right in front of me. the older kids 'helped' me look for my stolen bike but growing up I realized that they plotted this whole thing and yeah i basically gave my brand new bike away."
Nobody got hurt, but it doesn't mean certain actions don't sting.
Future Indication Of Trouble
"Living in the Netherlands. Classmate was showing on his phone a whole online shop he claimed to have with all kinds of drugs and weapons. We thought it was funny because we didn't take it too serious. He dropped out of school early and turned out to be a big drug dealer. Well we could have known I guess."
The Drama Department Wasn't Involved
"A kid faked her own kidnapping. It was all fun and games until the police started chasing her 'kidnappers' van."
"Pantsing somebody in front of everybody. Is that even allowed anymore? That was soooo commonplace as a kid.- Wearing a mirror on your shoes to look up skirts. Even teachers thought it was funny that students occasionally did that."
It's all fun and games until someone gets hurt.
But by the time the pain has been inflicted, it's too late as some emotional scars can take years to heal.
As someone who has been both a bully as well as a victim, I can tell you, I still live with regret and trauma from past actions in grade school.
Just gonna leave this here: Monitor your kids, folks.