Affordable housing. The ozone layer. Tan m&m's.
The past was full of awesomeness that we really should get back to.
It wasn't all sunshine and roses, we know that.
None of us are over here with the whole "I was born in the wrong decade" mentality—but you gotta admit a lower cost of living would be pretty dope.
Also that blue m&m's are inferior.
Reddit user Darko992 asked:
"What should we bring back from the past?"
Here are some things Reddit really wishes we never let go of.
Frock Yeah
"Cloaks."
"They look cool, often one size fits all, easier to take on or off than a jacket, and don’t have a dumb zipper."
- lordcaledonia
"Ya know how in Harry Potter they walk around London in cloaks and sh*t and people don’t even notice? "
"Well I was in the line at TSA and didn’t notice for a full 10 minutes that the lady in front of me was wearing a full-on velvety cloak. Once I did notice, my first thought was 'sh*t that’s a cool cloak.' So now I understand Muggle London"
- hausishome
"When I was stationed in Yongsan, South Korea I was waiting in line at Taco Bell when I see another soldier I kind of know walk up. We were both in civilian clothes - but her version of civvies was an awesome cloak."
"I got to talking with her and asked if she was going to a larp, she said no and said she just felt like rocking a cloak that day. "
"To this day her confidence has inspired me!"
- 360Entertainment
GiphyPractical Effects
"More real effects instead of CGI in movies. Obviously, CGI has made the impossible possible, but directors like Guillermo Tel Toro prove that there is a lot that can be created believably and beautifully on film."
- -PyramidHead
"Good practical effects will hold up basically forever, too. Look at The Thing; that movie is now forty years old and the effects still look top notch."
- ironwolf56
"Good CGI goes unnoticed. Slightly bad CGI looks f*cking terrible."
- crysco
"It still doesn't age well. The best CGI from the 90s looks decent (IE: Terminator 2) but you still have to be like 'It looks good....for 1991' since it never holds up to age."
- HelmutHoffman
What Wear When?
"Every fashion from every era at the same time. I'd love the mess it would make"
- AldaronWilwarin
"The 1720s. Puffy pants and powdered wigs baby"
- Joke_Mummy
"Well right now 60's-90's is apparently coming back in style, plus Amish attire."
"Source- worked at Nordstroms for a bit this year."
- PrityBird
"If capes were back in style I'd cry from joy."
- CityOfZion
"Definitely already a thing, with people coming in mullets and thrifting"
- GabrielliaPumphrey
AFK
"The expectation of lack of availability."
"The amount of technology we have is truly amazing and I love that I get to experience it. That being said, the idea that I am available 100% of the time from morning to night is easily the biggest source of stress I have in my life."
"I miss the time before smartphones."
- andlecrusher
"I felt the same, that anyone could demand my attention at any time and I would be expected to give it especially with phone calls."
"For the last few years I've had my phone on silent (no vibration). I choose when I look at my phone and respond to texts or call people back. Its freeing."
"Some people get frustrated by that, but that's a them problem."
"Just because they want to talk to me at a particular time does not mean that they can, I have a life too."
- isthisthewifi
Giphy
"Unless it's my girlfriend or my family, I just don't respond to texts or anything after like 5pm."
"Phone call? Go to voice-mail."
"You don't owe anybody your time, regardless of how they may feel about that."
- gamesireallylike
"I agree and I've learned to set boundaries so this is no longer an expectation."
"Work knows my hours and that I am not going to respond outside of those hours."
"The worst offender was my mother, who'd call like 5x in as many minutes at 10pm (I usually go to bed at 9pm, she knows this)."
"I set the boundary and told her that unless its an emergency, please do not call after 7pm (that's family time for us). Texting is ok, but I'll respond at my leisure then."
- cheesemongrel938491
Love Thy Neighbor
"A sense of community"
- Jaxxs90
"It's odd, this one. Because everyone alive would love for it to happen, but nobody wants to make it happen."
"When was the last time you spoke to your neighbours? A while ago I bet."
- fancybigballs
"I read a book about this. It's the idea of social infrastructure- creating spaces that encourage physical, human interaction and a community."
"Cars and suburbs in America have really f*cked this up because they prevent social interaction/sense of community."
"You get up in your suburban home where your nearest neighbor is still fairly distant, get in your car, and drive straight to work. Then you drive back home. Maybe you drive to some large superstores."
"In contrast, imagine more walkable cities like some in Europe or Asia. Neighborhoods where people live in closer proximity, where shops/cafes/libraries/small businesses owned by families are within walking distance, and where walkable paths and parks abound."
"A day might involve a lot more walking, passing by your neighbors on your street, building common interactions with locals, and where communities can hold more community events like farmers markets and stuff. "
"It's better for humans, better for the environment, better in almost every aspect."
"Not to say these things don't exist in America, or only exist in other countries, but most cities are such a far cry from this kind of community."
- ButterfreePimp
Built Tough
"Stuff being made to last a lifetime rather than a few months to a few years."
- Nobody91765
"Yes. A ban on planned obsolescence would be VERY nice."
- UsedLandscape876
"Poorly made throwaway goods have always been a staple of the market."
- ReallySmallWeenus
"It's not planned obsolescence, it's a 'defined service life.' "
"Materials science got to a point where they can cut costs down and deliver absolute minimum quality of material to hit a desired lifespan on a product."
"You can still buy things that last forever, they're just considered luxury product and cost 3-4 times as much."
"Go to the grill section of your local Home Depot and check out a Weber Genesis next to your average Charbroil or NexGrill for a visual example. "
"The Weber will easily last you a decade-plus, probably 20 years if you take care of it. On the other hand, the Charbroil will rust out within 3-5 years."
"Basically, if we want things that last, we either have to accept that everything is going to get at least 30% more expensive, or we just need to go pay for luxury items now."
- duffman13jws
GiphyGet Ronald On The Phone
"Old design of McDonalds buildings"
- Left-Pop-9420
"Right?! The new design looks like a depressed millennial. I want my free circus again!"
- arlingLee
"Including the ball pits and play places"
- obert-wan-kenobert
"When the new commercials came out that featured the retro lamps I got excited. I thought a franchise wide re-design was on the way. Nope."
- keylabulous
GiphyChill
"A relaxed life style and more family gatherings"
- adallal
"I would kill for the first one alone."
"Take me back to a time where like, you would just need to do your job, your part, and maintain your responsibilities and that's it."
- MolhCD
"Yeah. Now, it's more complex than just that."
"I think now we have too many responsibilities and higher expectations that those of the old days. This brings more worries and stress."
- adallal
Fresh
"Expunging juvenile records for stupid and petty crimes."
"I get having to prosecute minors as adults for serious crimes, but for stupid and petty things they don't automatically expunge them anymore like they used to and a juvenile record can haunt them for years."
"As long as the crime was petty and non-violent I want to get back to letting that child have a fresh start once they're an adult."
- llcucf80
"Wow! I didn’t know that changed. I’ll have to look in to that. Kids make stupid decisions and shouldn’t have to carry that burden in to adulthood."
- Equal_Nail925
GiphyLet's Get Physical
"Physical media. I miss the days of VHS and browsing video stores."
- lunchboxbeard82
"Yes! Physical all the way! I hate it when I hear an album or song and I find out it’s not on CD. I need something to play in the car!"
- Ok-Call-4805
"That's more on the consumer's end. Most digital media is still available in a physical counterpart."
"I'm somewhere in between, I get the appeal of physical media but I don't like having things. I still dislike streaming that turned media into basically a service that most of their users take for granted."
"I tend to buy digital copes of albums and keep listening to them in the same behavior I did when I was a kid and bought a cassette tape and was the only thing I heard for some time."
- flacocaradeperro
"Get that too. For me I miss the ritual of browsing and picking up an album or movie, reading the box, opening the box first time, etc."
OOH!
I just remembered another thing.
Do you guys remember when Pizza Hut was an awesome sit down experience with a salad bar and everything?
That crust just hit different—especially if you were there to celebrate your grades or reading accomplishments and you got your free little personal pizza.
I'm pretty sure it's all been down hill since pizza hut stopped being awesome.
Things People Do That Make You Instantly Hate Them
Reddit user meulinlalondeowo asked: 'What's something that someone can do, that makes you instantly hate them?'
Unfortunately, we can't all get along with everyone. Sometimes, we don't mesh with people. Other times, we did get along until we got burned by the other people one too many times.
And sometimes, they do something that bothers you so much that you hate them instantly.
For me, it's a co-worker who says they will complete a task, then pass it off to me at the last minute since they know I'm too shy to say no. I don't mind doing the work; I'd just like to that I have to do it before the deadline.
I tend not to be friendly to those co-workers. It stops them from trying to pull that again.
Redditors have identified the behaviors that make them instantly hate someone and are ready to share.
It all started when Redditor meulinlalondeowo asked:
"What's something that someone can do, that makes you instantly hate them?"
Don't Be A Slob
"Coworkers that don't clean up after themselves, leaving their personal crap for others to pick up."
– TiredOfEveryting
"This drives me crazy at my work place. The break room is always a mess. People leaving their things in the good spots and making it seem like they're saving the spot and then just don't come back. Leaving the tables dirty and sticky after they're done eating. Never pushing their chairs in."
"Like, yeah, we have cleaning staff but they aren't waiting around to clean up after every person. And even if they were, youre a f**king adult and should wipe up your own damn messes."
– StinkyKittyBreath
Not Funny
"Pranking someone in a way that deeply upsets them then laugh in their face"
– WiseOldChicken
"‘It was just a joke, why are you getting upset?’"
– Hellostranger1804
"A long time ago I was working at this cheesy company and they had this thing where the district manager would randomly call one of the offices once a month and ask whoever answered (rotating call system) what the top values of the company were. There was like a list of 5 things. If you got it right, you’d win $1,000."
"Well, one day I got the phone call. My heart was in my throat because I was so nervous, but I knew the answers. I felt like my prayers had been answered. I couldn’t pay my rent, I was always low on gas or completely out of food, I had even gone without heat in my car during Northern winter because I couldn’t afford to fix it. I was always drowning, no matter how hard I worked, with no resources, no credit or help around me—always stressed."
"Well the manager congratulated me for my knowledge and told me I won the thousand dollars. Still on the phone, I felt like a weight lifting off me, a sense of joy and ease coming—until a few people, all guys, came over laughing their a**es off and said it was “Dave” pranking me. I died inside."
"I started crying and yelling how cruel it was to do that. I was a young girl, in my early twenties then and Dave was like in his 40’s, I think. I was in disbelief. I am always friendly to everyone. Why me? They didn’t care how much it upset me. The whole lot of them. I’m 47 now and still remember the disappointing ache I felt in my heart that day more than twenty years ago. F**k you, Dave, and you other fools too, wherever you are!"
– IntrigueMachine
I Didn't Do It!
"Accusing me of something that I didn't do. Brings out instant ire in me."
– Pianowman
""I know you're lying because you're getting defensive about it.""
"rage."
– Kraymur
"They don’t seem to understand the concept that a person being accused of doing something they actually didn’t do would defend themselves."
– Intrepid-Lecture3077
Liar, Liar
"When they are lying, and I know that they are are lying, and they know that I know that they are lying, but they continue the lie."
– TrailerParkPrepper
"You are describing my brother."
"You forgot the part where you call them out on the lie, and they get angry with you because "they're not lying.""
– Pianowman
"My old boss."
"Boss: Why are you doing that?"
"Me: That’s what you said to do."
"Boss: I didn’t say that."
"Me: You said to do exactly this and I have witnesses that can confirm it."
"Boss: ………(storms off angrily) I got fired."
"Best thing that ever happened to me."
– audiorob1210
Just Be Nice
"When someone belittles someone for being excited over something or having a hobby"
"If someone says for example that they love to crochet and they’re excited to spend their day off making a new hat and someone makes fun of them they can get f**ked. No one should be made to feel bad for finding enjoyment in something harmless."
– Mushroomc0wz
"Rain on someone else's rainbow. If someone truly loves something like video games, a film genre, a sport or some other kind of interest/passion etc., and a person goes "that's a bit childish" or "X...is so boring" after they've explained why they love it, that to me is just mean and instantly turns me off."
– Soshedid2991
Animal Cruelty Is Not Okay
"Be cruel to an animal"
– Flimsy-Attention-722
"Throw a rock at a duck. It happened, i hate them."
– ohmyperfection
Litterbug
"litter"
– Flimsy-Attention-722
"I visited NOLA earlier this year and witnessed blatant littering right in front of me for the first time. This guy was walking out of a convenience store opening a candy bar, took the full wrapper off, and tossed it on the ground. Had that person waited 3-4 more strides, it would have literally landed in a trash can. I was bamboozled!"
– Bears_in_the_woods
Family Should Be Respected
"Talking bad about their spouse or children."
– SaiyanGodKing
"There's a guy who started at my work, sh*t talking his wife from day one. I told him he better show his wife some respect. The unfortunate thing is that I think this guy thinks he's just being cool or funny saying these things. But then they had a kid and the "jokes" were suddenly about both of them. He made a crack at them in a meeting with all my coworkers and I piped in and said "Jesus Christ dude, everytime you open your mouth I wanna smack the sh*t out of it""
"Haven't heard a negative thing about his wife or child since. Folks, ITS NOT F**KING COOL"
– JMC1110
My Turn To Talk!
"When they either accidentally or intentionally talk at the same time as someone or just straight up interrupt, they never go, "Oh sorry you go" but instead brute force their talking through."
"A girl in my indoor soccer team used to do this and one time I said to my friend, "The next time she does it, I'm just not going to back down." Next time, she interrupted me it was me and her talking to my friend continuously for like 2 minutes with him losing his mind trying to listen to both of us and at the end of it it was like she was completely unaware."
– SkinkaLei
Respect The Space
"Leaving their shopping cart blocking the entire aisle, totally oblivious to the existence of every other human in the grocery store."
– Dynamo_Ham
"Also, people who leave their shopping carts in the parking lot. Especially when blocking an open parking space."
– khelwen
"So brutal. Just callous pointless conduct that takes at most 15 seconds of effort to fix. Why?"
– Dynamo_Ham
"I love this so much! I'll find another unattended, sideways cart and swap a couple pretty noticeable items between them. Then when dipsh*t finally wanders back they just stare in hilarious confusion; they're pretty sure this was their cart, but the case of water is gone and they didn't grab that bottle of wine that's sitting on top so maybe it isn't. You can practically see the steam coming out their ears as they struggle to process it."
"Shopping with idiots used to be a huge source of stress, but I've found ways to make it entertaining."
– Belphegorite
Drive Safe
"Not use a turn signal."
"F**k you you piece of sh*t. I don't care what the f**king reason is. USE YOUR F**KING TURN SIGNAL."
– MickCollins
"And do it correctly."
"Can't tell you how many times I see a lane switch and when the car is already half way over the line will they grace us with a single half blink."
– AngelOfDeath771
I can't tell you how many times I screamed at other drivers (in my head) for not using turn signals. It's no joke!
Do you have any items to add to the list let us know in the comments below.
Men and women and talking and flirting.
What a disaster that can be.
It's especially tricky when men flirt with women who are into women.
It sounds like a lot of gents can't take that obvious hint.
How this is STILL an issue in 2023 is beyond us all.
But here we are.
Gentlemen, please sit and read the following.
And then read it again.
Then share with your friends and male family.
A deleted Redditor wanted to hear about the ways straight men couldn't take a hint, so they asked:
"Lesbians of Reddit, what’s the most ridiculous thing a straight guy told you to talk you into having sex with them?"
How Patriotic
"I had a guy try to entice me with his weed. He literally pulled out the American flag bong with the grinder that looked like ammunition. Honestly left me kinda speechless."
xSwishyy
A Transplant
"Didn't go as far as sex but was definitely the most ridiculous thing a straight guy has said to me so far. I was trying to check out at the store when the 60-something y/o cashier started flirting with me, asking if I had a boyfriend, etc. When he asked why I didn't I told him I'm a lesbian and he said 'I actually have a female kidney from my transplant a couple years ago so we wouldn't have a problem together.'"
BestiesWithBaphomet
Me Too!
"The opposite - a very drunk man approached me on a station platform and asked me out. I awkwardly replied, 'Sorry, I’m gay.' He said, 'You like women??' and I nodded, bracing for homophobia… but instead he just excitedly exclaimed 'ME TOO!!!' and shook my hand. Then he left me alone. It was an extremely funny and non-threatening interaction and I think fondly of him from time to time."
orangepigeon
Let's Dance
"My brother was absolutely refusing to take no for an answer when asking [my friend] to prom. I think my brother asked my friend to prom like 5 times before they just started ignoring him. I also told off my brother cause my friend is open about being a lesbian and told him that they were a lesbian. Something about not having a lesbian somehow makes guys angry because they can't take no for an answer."
pumpkinthighs
Can men really be this off?
Oh the Drama
Feeling It Drama Club GIF by NickelodeonGiphy"He said that I had no idea what it's like to be the single straight guy who tries to find (sex) love. And it's cruel for me to not give him even a chance to be romantic with me. And I don't have a good reason to say no because he is good-looking and earns more money than I do lol."
Original-Pineapple18
DIBS
"This guy was one of my closer friends at the time, and SOLIDLY friend-zoned. We’d established countless times over the last year that we weren’t into each other, I was lesbian, and that even if I weren’t he wouldn’t go for me, yada yada. We’d talked about things that I would NOT have discussed if I knew he would ever be into me."
"Well lo and behold, one day I realize I’m questioning whether I’m bisexual or not due to a mutual friend. I bring it up to him in a state of real vulnerability, cuz I thought I’d had everything figured out before this, but wanted my friend’s input on if it was a good idea to bring it up to hot-dude directly."
"This grown-a** man told me HE HAD DIBS. D I B S."
Kazooasaurus
Preferences
"Not a lesbian, but I’m bi with a pretty strong preference for women. Probably THE most common response from guys when I say I’m not interested in 'Really? I dunno, you don’t look like you date girls.' I never know how to respond. Do they expect me to suddenly realize I’m NOT into women? Do they think questioning my preferences is endearing or sexy??"
Individual_Ad_7523
So Sexy
Ryan Reynolds GIF by CBCGiphy"Always the standard idea of they think their penis is magical and can 'turn' me. Uh, no. Also, have had more than a few guys say 'You're too attractive' to be a lesbian. They actually think it's a compliment. Oof."
Goody2Shuuz
Listen to someone's boundaries when they tell you, gentleman!
It's really that simple.
Does anyone have any similar stories? Let us know in the comments below.
As a society, we have made this general correlation that spending more means receiving a higher-quality item.
But sometimes we need to remember that affordable purchases are totally worth our time, and sometimes those purchases prove to be the true game-changers.
Redditor degenerateunicorn asked:
"What inexpensive purchase improved your life greatly?"
Long Charging Cables
"For once and for all, it's a ten-foot charging cable for your phone!"
- usuperavenger
"Not just one... but one for each room you regularly charge your phone. A 10-footer in the bedroom and a 10-footer in the loungeroom, changed my life."
- lhsofthebellcurve
Good Earplugs
"Earplugs. Just pop those in your ears and shut the world out."
- lapsangsouchogn
"I bought some to help me sleep and oh. my. god. I sat on this brilliant idea for seven years. I feel so ashamed of myself."
- DidDunMegasploded
A Library Card
"Does a library card count?"
- Lookimawave
"I'd say so! There's just so much you can do at local libraries! Especially in the bigger cities. The things they have to lend out are really interesting and definitely not just books!"
- appleparkfive
"I hardly ever even go into the physical library, but the card gives me access to e-books, audiobooks, and movies via Libby, Hoopla, Overdrive, and Canopy. Although the physical library does have neat resources like 3D printers, laser cutters, a recording studio, etc."
- Lookimawave
An Electric Toothbrush
"Electric toothbrush!"
- imvital
"Does it make a big difference? Lifelong manual toothbrush user, but I've been considering converting if it's worth it."
- ILoveLamp_1995
"A few years back I needed to get a new toothbrush and the cheapest in the store was a battery-powered electric. I thought why not and tried it out."
"My next dentist visit showed a marked improvement with just that cheap, crappy brush."
"I bought an Oral-B electric brush (with bluetooth!) right there in the dentist's office. Since then, my dentist checkups have just been a bit of scraping, with very little if any bleeding. Definitely worth it."
- nabrok
A Jogging Phone Holder
"A shoulder holster for my phone when I started to run again. It was the running that changed my life obviously, but having my phone within Bluetooth range for music made it achievable. Cost me all of seven dollars."
- EveryonesADose
More Pillows
"I got myself a third pillow last year. I don't know what it is about it but definitely has made sleeping better."
- potatosalade26
A Roomba or Equivalent
"Not necessarily cheap, but a Roomba. Now I HAVE to keep my place clean and decluttered so it can work. No more piles of laundry and whatnots."
- Pale-Dust2239
"There are cheaper ones out there and if you decide to give them a go 100% pay for the extended warranty."
"I got a Eufy which we love but have had it replaced twice in three years for free. Next time it dies we’ll be out of warranty so hopefully I can get enough cash together for a Roomba."
- MissingVanSushi
A Swiss Army Knife
"I got it as a gift but a basic Swiss Army knife. It fits in my pocket, and gives me a crappy screwdriver, bottle opener, tweezers, etc., in a pinch. It also doesn’t freak people out like other pocket knives."
- Mrofcourse
A Meat Thermometer
"A meat thermometer takes the guesswork and worry out of internal temps."
- 9umopapisdn
"Oh my god, do you have a Meater? My husband says it’s the best gift I’ve ever given him. It’s a meat thermometer that connects to your phone."
- degenerateunicorn
A Bidet
"A bidet."
- art8127
"Yes! It costs thirty dollars, and even a doofus like me was able to 'install' it in under 10 minutes."
- poppy-sparklehorse
A Sleep Mask
"A proper sleep mask."
"They're not too expensive. I wrap it around one of those microwavable bean bags shortly before bed and it becomes a warm mask for falling asleep. Super comfortable."
- zomboromcom
"I agree, mine was a great purchase. Not only does it help me sleep in later, but putting it on has now become the signal to my body that it's time to sleep."
- sedimentary-1
Glass Lens Cloth
"Glasses cleaner cloth. Such a little soft piece of cloth saves me from the frustration of constant smears, smudges, possible scratches, and ruining the anti-glare layer on my glasses. I hate looking out of dirty glasses."
- agbmom
A Bicycle
"I bought a second-hand bike for $60 back in the autumn of 2020. I took to cycling, and because of that, I lost 35lbs (but put 20 back on), it renewed my sex life with my husband and I feel healthier. It’s very calming (it’s a multi-use trail, so no vehicles and it’s flat and maintained)."
"I have some wonderful folks I talk to every time I go out and dogs I get to give treats to. I go out any morning I can Spring/Summer/Autumn for between 90 minutes to two hours, as long as it isn’t raining or too windy… I’ll even go out when it’s below 0°C. I’m early retired, so I have plenty of time."
- NickNNS
A Wet Pallet for Painting
"My homemade wet pallet. Leftover scrap container, some sponge, parchment paper, and a little water, and boom. Perfectly thinned acrylic paint and blending surface. It was a game changer for me as an artist."
- Adubya76
A Backscratcher
"A one-dollar backscratcher!"
- LazyHighGoals
"I keep a backscratcher on my nightstand, and now I don’t know how I lived without it."
- wholewheatscythe
Each of these purchases are items that we could not only see purchasing ourselves, but we can totally understand how these were life-changing for these Redditors, despite the price of the purchases. Sometimes the most life-changing things have the smallest price tags!
Getting a job may be difficult, but believe it or not, it's allegedly harder to get fired from jobs.
Employees have to seriously be incapable of doing the job they were hired for, or they must be so miserable after realizing the job description was not what they signed up for that they deliberately jeopardize their position just to be shown the door.
Strangers online were happy to provide examples of terminated coworkers when Redditor Business_Reporter420 asked:
"What’s the fastest way you’ve ever seen a new coworker get fired?"
The couple times deserve the benefit of a doubt.
And then there are the other times after that...
Losing Track Of Time
"6 hours. Call center job. She showed up to orientation on day 1 about an hour late. Hey stuff happens. Then we go on a 15 min break. She goes out to take a phone call, comes back in after about 45 min. We go to lunch, it's 30 minutes. She comes back over an hour later. We go on afternoon break, when the 15 min break is up, one of the trainers gets up and steps out in the hall and closes the door behind him. We hear her arrive and argue with him about 20 minutes after that. He comes back in and gets the stuff she left at her desk and we never see her again."
– misoranomegami
A String Of Unfortunate Events
"First day, her grandmother died. Understandable. Second day, her car broke down. Bad luck. Third day she had no electricity and couldn’t blow dry her hair. She was told not to bother coming in at all."
– exitzero
The Employee On Her Own Schedule
"There are a lot of these people. What do they think is going to happen, like they'll come in to work eventually, everyone will understand, and they'll be a great employee... tomorrow though. Today they're hungover."
"I fired a girl like this... she acted gobsmacked 'wow, gosh, really? This is kinda crazy, i've never been fired before.'"
"She showed up for about 50% of her scheduled days for like 2 straight weeks. Did she really think that was how jobs work?"
– Steinmetal4
Downfall Of Mass Hiring
"Worked for startups the past couple of years before I recently took a new gig but we had to hire about 100 people in the span of 2 weeks which I told my boss was a bad idea but the CEO insisted"
"Hired a young lady, she had a spotty resume but was very cheerful and friendly in the interview and my boss's instructions were if they are nice and friendly 'pass them on to me.'"
"we oversaw the customer service relations for this company."
"On her first day she came in 15 minutes late, got into an argument with a customer on her first training call and took the mic and farted into it as loud as I've ever heard a human being fart"
"We paid her for the full day."
"Best hire ever."
– _Nolofinwe_
Some people were never a fit for the job.
Fear Gets In The Way
"I was working as a stable boy, and I was showing the new girl around the stables. As I introduced her to the horses, she was very apprehensive to come near them, refusing to even step into the stall (she signed on to help care for the horses.)"
"Later that day, she admitted that the horses terrified her, so the boss let her go."
– AlternativeFilm8886
The Sibling Discount
"In high school I worked at a clothing store as a cashier. Guy next to me has his sister come through with a huge pile of merchandise."
"He scans one item that was on clearance for like $2 over and over again for everything she had, which was likely hundreds of dollars."
"Didn’t realize the manager was standing right behind him."
“Go clock out and give me your name tag, you’re gone.”
"He didn’t argue or anything, just put his head down and walked off."
"The manager jumps on the register to clear the transaction out and the sister takes out her card, 'This is gonna be a credit.'”
"Manager says 'Not for $2 it’s not, get out of here.'”
"The sister actually tried to complete the purchase like nothing had happened lol"
– Plantayne
Gamer On The Clock
"A guy at my work was caught playing World of Warcraft for hours each day. Boss called him in and told him that was wholly unacceptable and he had to stop immediately or he'd be canned."
"Less than an hour later, IT calls the same boss and says the guy is back in his office playing again. He was let go that day."
– jpiro
Rule Breaker
"Worked in a sales call center about 10 years ago, real braindead work. New guy starts on a Monday morning, after he gets trained up on the basics (which takes about an hour), he gets assigned a desk and sets off to work."
"30 minutes later, it looks like little puffs of steam are rising up from his computer monitor. Turns out he was vaping on one of those disposable ecigarettes, the kind that sort of tried to look like real cigarettes. He gets told by the boss that we can't vape indoors, and if he wants to, he'll have to go outside to do it on a break."
"About 30 minutes later again, the same thing happens. He gets caught again, and is told in no uncertain terms that if he wants to keep his job, he'll stop vaping at his desk."
"An hour later, he gets caught hiding under his desk vaping, and is promptly fired, all before lunch time. Dude could have just gone outside."
– Mr_Itch
First And Final Delivery
"Day 1, delivering pizzas. I was the trainer."
"Dude wasn't familiar with the town at all (this was before GPS was a thing)."
"Second delivery, he gets in the car, and proceeds to floor it in the parking lot, showing off all 80 horsepower for the 30 feet before slamming on the brakes to turn onto the main street, nearly hitting a customer and her young child."
"I say whoah, slow down in the Parking lot, you almost hit that kid."
"'F'k em' was his response."
"That was his last delivery, lasted all of about 90 minutes."
– talontd92tsi
The easiest way for a worker to get off the payroll is for them to actually quit.
Misunderstanding Of A Job Position
"I used to work night audit/front desk at a motel adjacent to major highways. It was a super chill job, I loved my boss, and it was cool by me."
"But God, trying to hire and train someone to take over my hours - once for maternity leave, and then when I was moving away - was a nightmare. One lady claimed to be computer literate, and then tried to use the mouse to physically touch the correct spot on the monitor when I asked her to click on a field. Another got extremely confused when I mentioned that sleeping with a guest was completely out of bounds. A guy got arrested (and fired of course) for selling drugs to someone out the night window. It was just an absolute sh*t show."
"Before I moved, I gave my boss a 2-month notice, because I knew hiring and training was gonna be a nightmare. About a week before my final shift, we finally got someone in place. She was more than a bit strange and could certainly have used a spot of mental health care, but hey, I can't throw stones. She showed up, grasped the basics of the job, etc. About a week after I left, I learned that she had quit because she didn't realize that night audit was a purely overnight job."
"Idk."
– 50EffingCabbages
The Newbie's Assigned Task
"He didn’t get fired, he quit. But this dude was a first day hire as a bagger at a grocery store. Some dude blew up the entire bathroom with diarrhea. Walls, doors, sink, mirror, everywhere. They asked new dude to go clean it. He clocked out and never came back. He’s a hero."
– mrmastomas
I briefly worked for an entertainment company as a dancer with a friend of mine who was unfortunately let go during the rehearsal process.
He was unable to keep up with the demanding rehearsal schedule and couldn't retain the mass amount of choreography we were being taught in a short amount of time.
Poor guy wasn't even a slacker. As a matter of fact, he far exceeded my dancing capabilities and was hard-working, but he let himself get in the way and couldn't handle the pressure.
But by letting him go, the production company took a hit because teaching a new-hire everything from the beginning slowed us down more than the time it would've taken to help my friend memorize the choreography.
Sigh...