Image by mohamed Hassan from Pixabay

One of the greatest lessons in life is to know when to listen and also acknowledge when someone is talking smack, so you just run away to save your own life.

These days everyone thinks they're an arm chair therapist. Everybody has an opinion, a solution and an answer. In truth everyone has thought this for a long time actually. And it's bunk.

I'm not saying we all don't have ideas for good advice or can't help another person heal. But we really need to be more careful about the knowledge we're tossing about. And we need to be even more astute about what wisdom we decide to believe.

The slightest bit of advice can change a life, if we let it. So first, go on your own thoughts before you piggyback another.

Redditor u/Truzt102 wanted to hear about all the things they've been told "in the spirit" of help that was really just a load of crap, by asking:

What is the worst advice you've ever received?

I stopped listening to people recently. I had to. Mainly because it hindered my ability to listen to myself. I've taken so much bad advice merely because I believed they knew better, when they knew nothing. And I know I'm not alone.

Be Dumb

Confused Threes Company GIF by MOODMAN Giphy

"You should act less smart so more guys talk to you."

- imerbear

Ignorance...

"Just ignore the bully. He'll get bored. I wish my parents told me, "To Hell that kid up. You're 16. Slap on the wrist."

- starryknight

"I was bullied all throughout middle and high school. I dropped out half way through my sophomore year, then went back after working a summer."

"Former bully tried it again, and I just shouted "F* OFF!" in his face. He was so surprised. Thus ended 8+ years of torment. He never tried anything again. I dropped out again though, got my GED, went to college and did well. I'm good now. ADHD + meds = functional adult."

- millenniumtree

Shake it Off...

"Work through the pain, it will make your back feel better. It didn't."

- Gweinnblade

"I lost a friend because they felt I was lazy for not "powering through" the chronic pain issues I have and "just live life" instead. Umm... I am powering through it every single moment of the day from the moment I will myself out of bed. It is exhausting and there's a limit to how much one can do that. I have an autoimmune condition so it looks like there's nothing wrong with me from the outside, and a lot of folks don't care much beyond the superficial."

- Ikaruseijin

Ok Octomom...

My (ex-) co-worker advised me to have a baby because I was suffering so badly from my depression. She said this would cure my "bad mood."

- Tool-Vicarious

"I once had a patient with borderline personality disorder also suffering from depressions. She already had 5 children from 5 different (ex-)partners, who where all in foster homes, because she could not care for them. Neglect, abuse, dangerous situations and the sorts.

"That day she told me she was so happy because she was pregnant again from an unknown partner. She was happy because pregnancy always made her feel better. I could only think about the next child's life being ruined. Although I'm generally opposed to forced contraception... sometimes... Don't fall for the trap."

- AnotherPerspective87

Just Eat!

Excited Food GIF by Rosanna Pansino Giphy

"Come on, stop complaining and swallow it." No mom, I'm allergic to freaking soy, if I swallow it I'll probably die."

- MercilessIdiot

First, listen to generational advice carefully. Each generation has a different perspective and we're learning a lot of it is shaded by trauma. That's important to recognize. Don't fall victim to other's issues.

Buzzz...

sad macaulay culkin GIF Giphy

"Kick it to see if there are anymore bees inside." There were plenty of bees still inside."

- remotefun2062

never say sorry to a student...

"When I was an aspiring educator, I received a lot of scary advice about how school teachers should run a classroom from people who were well intended, but were completely out of touch. The most memorable was from a woman who had been a special education teacher for years and her nugget of wisdom was to "never say sorry to a student and never admit you're wrong." My philosophy as a teacher could never be more opposite."

- lauraligator

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A Little Rash

"No need to go to the doctor, it's just a little rash." It was Lyme's and I nearly died. "It was the Urgent Care nurse who said this. I believed it, my mom didn't, the next place sent me to the hospital."

- ATLander

"It bothers me how Americans need to make sure they ABSOLUTELY NEED to see a doctor before they go and look for medical help. It must suck that you can't just pop into the ER to check your weird rash, just to be safe. I really hope your healthcare gets better in the future."

"Also, I mean no offence, nor am I sh*tting on your country. I just wished everybody had the reassurance that they'll get the help they need without having to sell your firstborn. Someone mentioned an affordable system called Direct Primary Care. Don't know anything about it, just thought I should pass it on."

- Fk-tiktok

Failure to Launch

"My father once told me, when I was in my teens, "don't ever try anything new because you might fail." That's like the opposite of what good parents are supposed to say. He had recently went out and tried a career change and failed."

- rujoe

"My father said something similar. "You think like you live in a game. As if you're Super Mario in The Matrix."

"Something doesn't work out and you think you could just try again. That's not how life works, son. You need to have your entire life planned out and stick to that plan." For one, I did not think that. I was very well aware that I was on planet Earth in material form and that deus ex machinas don't happen in real life."

"Second, The Matrix does not work that way. Third, why do I need to have my life planned out at 13 years old? Aren't I supposed to try things out and then keep trying to do the things I enjoy until I'm good at them? Not according to my dad. He kept berating me about this until I finally moved out after graduating."

- ShatteredMasque

This was literally 1984!

Music Videos 80S GIF Giphy

"In 1984 I was told by a friend's mom that computers were "a fad" and that I shouldn't major in computer science in college. I ignored that advice, it was obvious even then this was a crazy take. This was literally 1984! Van Halen wasn't really my scene though, I was more into new wave music at the time."

- UlrichZauber

Family Fun

"When my mom was dying in hospice, a coworker of mine told me I should at least let her family know, even though my mom told me she didn't care if they knew or not. Well, I let them know, and I definitely regretted it. The sister and her kids made it an entire dramatic ordeal and had to be removed from the room. Her brother didn't even call or text, just sent his dingbat wife who didn't even notice my mom had already passed. Haven't heard from either of them in the year since she's passed. My mom was right."

- jsanders4289

Hands Down

"If somebody's mean to you it's because they like you." Can people please stop telling kids this? I used to believe it, too. Yeah, maybe sometimes it's true, but most of the time it's not! Especially above the age of 7 lol."

- WholesomeNerd13

Ha Ha

"In 1998, I was a senior in college and completely frustrated by the college administrations inability to adapt to the online world, particularly with class scheduling. My last semester of school, where I was a jaded senior and didn't give a crap and just wanted enough hours to graduate."

"I remember a lady in the registrars office vehemently denying that registration would ever go online. Her words were something like "We will ALWAYS do in person registration, computers will never change that." I want to find that lady today and just smirk."

- WorshipNickOfferman

In the Shops

Julia Roberts Shopping GIF by SundanceTV Giphy

"I was 19, thinking about maybe going to college or getting a job in finance. My friend's mum said "no, don't do that. You know where the real money is? Shops. Working in shops."

- staycalm_keepwarm

A Pinch

"You should let it pinch you, it won't hurt that much..."

"It was the biggest crawdad I ever saw and I was maybe like 10 fishing with my Dad. He didn't think I would be stupid enough to do it, but I wanted to impress him. The chaos that then ensued; I picked it up and let it pinch the soft skin between my thumb and hand promptly scream in pain."

"Dad was laughing his butt off tried to help just to be pinched by the other claw on the back of his hand. This cycle of continuous pinching continues as we stupidity try to help one another then finally we get it removed and my Dad says to body slam it so I throw it as hard as I can back into the lake."

- MamaSajahara

Above It...

"Live above your means. It motivates you to do better" Uhhh...No."

- Strange-Cry-5930

"Had a sales manager basically say this. Honestly don't remember how the conversation got there, but was told "we need to get you some debt so that you will stay motivated." I preferred to live below my means so I could tell him to run off whenever I pleased."

- legion_emt

Happy Away

"Try to think of happier things when you hallucinate. Yeah... let me just think of a unicorn, I can totally control schizophrenia. That'll help me not see the blurry faceless man following me in the hallway. Maybe I won't be so paranoid. That how that works, right? Happy away the illness."

- RavenousRabidRabbit

The Scraper

"I scraped someone's truck in our apartment complex a few weeks after I first got my license at 18, in my defense he was very over the lines and it was the only available spot. Called my dad in a panic because I didn't know what to do, he told me to go park in the lot of the apartments next to us and just pretend nothing happened unless someone confronts me. New and inexperienced, I listened."

"Horrible advice, someone saw it and the guy found which apartment I was in. He was pissed but more understanding when he realized I was just a kid (to a guy In his 40s I guess 18 is a kid) and explained what happened. We worked insurance stuff out and I learned to never take my dad's advice."

"I should mention that I'm not considering 18 to be fully matured, I'm currently 24 and 18 year Olds definitely seem younger than they did when I was 18, I guess I consider kids to be more like people I wouldn't trust to leave home alone. That said, they are just as stupid as kids sometimes, like when they hit a truck and then take their dad's advice to do nothing and hope I don't get in trouble."

- casey12297

Perfection

"Don't break up with him! You're perfect together! Spoiler alert: we weren't."

- Ocean_Hair

"Not the same but in adjacent territory, my ex-bf's sister said we should have a baby together because they make everything awesome. I was in my early 20s in college, and he was in his late 30s as were his siblings. I was obviously in a predatory dynamic and didn't know it at the time but I definitely wasn't about to take her advice."

- Iamwounded

No Dear

Cbs No GIF by HULU Giphy

"Former mother in law- if you love him harder he won't hit you."

- Atheva31

"My grandmother told my mom "maybe try making him decent coffee and he would be gentler" forget you Gretchen."

- thisdogsmellsweird

Advice is tricky. Everyone wants to help. And more often than not we're all more failing than helping. Learning to listen to our gut and our won voice is where we should start with advice. That's my advice. Let's try... begin.

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