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You know how some articles require a lot of nuanced backstory and tell a deeply heartwarming tale?

Yeah... this ain't that.


This is a nice simple article about why folks should 100% not be allowed to use any of that newfangled youth-speak without a translator. Because when they do, they end up accidentally encouraging students to perform fellatio.

Recently, an image that shows exactly that scenario has been making the rounds across the internet. According to one Reddit user, it's a sign posted at the health center of their sister's school.

Yup.

That happened.

i.redd.it

Take a long look at that "coughing" emoji. Take a long, deep, hard look.

Do you see it?

Reddit certainly did, and the jokes ... well ... they write themselves.

"A lot of time people are very prone to coughing fits after eating eggplants, you should suggest that they put an eggplant emoji right before it, for awareness." - Cetun
"This emoji would have made The Emoji Movie a whole lot more interesting." - FooFooPottyMouf
"Netflix and coughing is now a thing?!" - SurvivorDress
"This would totally change my tinder game if I had an emoji like this" - TToiv

Twitter noticed, too.



As embarrassing as going viral for this must be for the staff, they shouldn't feel too bad. The students will absolutely remember the sign and the message, after all.

They should really take heart in the knowledge that they're not the only completely oblivious adults out there trying to be "hip" and failing like.

Giphy

Because this next story had us cackling.

We'll let you use Urban Dictionary to figure out what thunderclap is in current slang and why it's not at all appropriate to call an award for children.

"My husband is a high school teacher, and at his school the mascot is Thor/thunder. Administration started giving awards to praise student behavior, and asked teachers to nominate kids for 'Thunderclap Awards'. "- Cyndurblox

So what have we learned?

If you're old enough to drink, you're old enough to be out of the youth-speak loop; and maybe you should run these things by actual kids before you end up as a cautionary internet tale.

Clint Patterson/Unsplash

Conspiracy theories are beliefs that there are covert powers that be changing the course of history for their own benefits. It's how we see the rise of QAnon conspiracies and people storming the capital.

Why do people fall for them? Well some research has looked into the reasons for that.

The Association for Psychological Science published a paper that reviewed some of the research:

"This research suggests that people may be drawn to conspiracy theories whenβ€”compared with nonconspiracy explanationsβ€”they promise to satisfy important social psychological motives that can be characterized as epistemic (e.g., the desire for understanding, accuracy, and subjective certainty), existential (e.g., the desire for control and security), and social (e.g., the desire to maintain a positive image of the self or group)."

Whatever the motivations may be, we wanted to know which convoluted stories became apart of peoples consciousness enough for them to believe it.

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I hate ghosts, even if it's Casper. My life is already stressful enough. I don't need to creeped out by spirits from the beyond. Shouldn't they be resting and basking in the glow of the great beyond instead of menacing the rest of us?

The paranormal seems to be consistently in unrest, which sounds like death isn't any more fun or tranquil than life. So much for something to look forward to.

Some ghosts just like to scare it up. It's not always like "Ghosthunters" the show.

Redditor u/Murky-Increase4705 wanted to hear about all the times we've faced some hauntings that left us shook, by asking:

Reddit, what are your creepy encounters with something that you are convinced was paranormal?
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The past year brought about much anxiety and it's been a challenge to find the light in what has felt like perpetual darkness.

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A lot of talk going on about women's bodies, isn't there?

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