Sailors Reveal The Scariest Nighttime Encounter They've Had In The Open Waters
The open ocean can be a terrifying place even in full daylight, but pitch blackness definitely ups the creep factor.
Unable to see your surroundings with miles of the unknown beneath you, it's understandable that most people might be a little jumpier than usual.
Reddit user u/SolaVirtusNobilitat asked:
20.
Off the coast of Jonesport on a WesMac. 3 of us decide to spend the night to get an even earlier start on the lobsters.
Quiet night, low winds, the Milky Way a broad band of light across the sky. Around 2 we all awake at the same time because we hear something really, really long slowly scrape along under the hull. Our beds were about a foot above from whatever it was. We looked at each other in silence. None of us wanted to be a hero and go up to see if there was anything to see. You wouldn't have, either, bud.
19.
US Navy, Petty Officer in charge of Low visibility watch. Watch that is called when you are in the middle of the ocean and there is so much fog you can't see far from the ship. Watches are stationed in different places on a ship, to listen, watch and record any activity. It is to make sure no one sneaks up or we don't run into another ship or boat.
Anyway, I had just made my rounds and making sure everyone was in place and awake because it was middle of the night and pitch black. I was just about to check in with bridge watch and I get a call over the radio from 2 different watch stations. They reported movement in the water but was unable to see what it was, it sounded like something cutting through the water very fast. I called for the watch officer and I was already at the bridge so reported it and went to investigate one station while the officer went and checked the other.
With us posting at each, we both heard it, but could not see anything. The fog was so dense you couldn't see the water line. Two different stations hearing the same thing. (LHA is not a small ship).
We were all tense. We were thinking the worst. Just then a break in the fog reveals that there are huge fish swimming around us feeding on the algae. The algae was luminous and as the fish would swim through, it looked like hundreds of shooting stars in the water. It was beautiful! Even these words can't describe the beauty.
So my report read that it was a huge school of fish. The only people to whiteness it was the people on the watch.
18.
While I was on 31st MEU, one night at like 0100, I walked down the starboard outside gangway that runs from the Marine maintenance shops, to the gym on the starboard side. It's about 150' feet long, and since we were in blackout conditions, it was pitch black outside.
About 2/3 the way down, there was this "Cwhiz" part of the defense system, that sticks out off the gangway so the hand rope cuts out through there.
As soon as I let go of the rope to grab the wall on the opposite side, the ship, which was in otherwise calm, flat water, decided to suddenly drop 10' as if it ran across another ships wake.
As I struggled to hold on, I swear I could feel something pulling me, almost as the ship suddenly rocked 45 degrees and I was getting shaken off like water on a dog.
Once it recovered, and I got my footing, it was back to flat, calm water. I blindly scrambled as fast as I could to the end, got inside and no one knew what bump I was talking about.
Mind you this is a several hundred ton warship and home to thousands. If there was chop; we'd know.
Nevertheless I took the interior passages after that.
Edit: apparently it's "CIWS" not "Cwhiz" but I'm going to leave it for comment continuity. Too many acronyms.
17.
Not a boat or sailor, but back in 2014 I did a lot of IT work on off-shore drilling rigs during their final construction phases. Basically, after the rigs went through most of their construction, I would be flown out there for a day or two to get all of the general networking and systems up and running. This included verifying the microwave data link back to shore.
Now this was only about 10-20 miles off the CA coast, but it's still as dark as you can imagine out there. It's even quieter than normal because during this phase, there is maybe only one or 2 other people on board. Typically an electrician and a general foreman or similar. Sometimes only one of the two.
Anyhow, I was working on a rig about 20 miles out from Long Beach CA. I was going through some rough relationship issues at the time and wasn't in a great place mentally or emotionally.
We didn't have internet on the rig at this point so I was pretty bored and caught up in my head so I decided to go take a walk.
I ended up on the helipad smoking a cigarette and just looking at the stars. About 2 minutes later I almost crapped myself or jumped out of my skin. Maybe both.
As I was sitting there, a very small Asian man tapped me on my shoulder from behind. He was wearing a high-vis vest and white construction helmet. He asked me for a cigarette and where the closest bathroom was. I gave him one and pointed him in the right direction. Didn't really think twice about it.
Walked back down to the living quarters and passed the foreman on the way. Told him about the guy I gave a smoke to and he stopped walking and immediately turned around. Told me no one else was on this rig but him and I.
I ran to the IT closet where they kept their security camera storage appliance but our PoE switch wasn't installed yet. No video. Nothing.
We turned on every light source possible on the rig. Did a basic walk through but found no one or any traces of anyone.
We also contacted our transport company which also always typically has a search and rescue team available. They flew over 4 SAR and 2 security personnel. They did a walkthrough of the entire rig. Every possible inch they claim. Took almost a full day. Never turned up.
Still get a bit creeped out thinking about it. If given 3 wishes, one of them would be to know who/what that was and where they went.
16.
So I'm a US Navy guy. We were somewhere in the Pacific and it was warm so I am assuming the Indian ocean, this was circa 2004. I worked nights and it's supersizing how quiet an aircraft carrier can be at night.
On this night there were no flight operations and about 80% of the crew is asleep, no one even-thinking about flying around. The sea wasn't too rough that day, however I do remember the sound of the random thuds of slightly larger waves. So, at about 1am we decide to cut through the hanger bay to lunch. There were two guys in-front of us. I could see them moving in back and forth in a "s" type pattern meaning the ship was rolling gently port to starboard (left to right). As the two guys in-front of me "S" snaked toward the open aircraft elevator door (side door about 50x40ft).
I could see the top of a wave coming right at us. That wave had just decided to join us in the hanger bay. The bottom of the wave hit with that vibrating thud, the top of the wave sheered off and rolled right in to the hanger-bay. Knocking over the two guys and as it turned from a wave into a puddle, the wave decided to return to the ocean sucking the two guys out toward the dark ocean.
Fortunately one sailor stopped short and the other managed to grab on to the post and wire that loosely guard the elevator door opening.
That was 100% sketch!
15.
I was on a friends boat in the San Fransisco Bay a good number of years ago. It was well past dark and I was enjoying the ocean breeze leaning over the gunwhale. All of the sudden something black exploded out of the water while cutting loose this slobbery snarling "BLAARRRRRGGHHH." All I saw was a flash of crazy sharp fangs sillouhhetted by a black greasy looking mass before it crashed back into the water.
After everybody came running to see why I was screaming and crapping my pants it was explained to me that I probably saw a sea lion jump out of the water in suprise at the boat passing so close to it.
14.
More weird than sketchy, but squid fishermen. Hundreds of them with white lights in the middle of the night and in the middle of what we thought was no where. They were small boats so we saw the lights well before we saw them on radar. Kind of freaked until we got closer and realized what they were.
13.
Underway, early March in a snowstorm, well east of Cape Cod, moderate seas and ship is rocking pretty good. We lose power and go beam to the seas. Except for emergency lighting, which was not much because our battle lanterns were garbage, and personal mini mag lights, it's dark as hell at times. The worst part? You could hear the creaks and groans of the ship. It was intensified when the ship would take longer than normal to right itself. It made the ship seem much older than it was. At times like those, I would say to myself, "should've went to college, dipsh*t!"
12.
Not really an encounter but we had a man over board at 2am, 8 days into a 21 day sail from the Galapagos to Polynesia. Really heavy weather and couldn't snuff out parasail and someone came forward without being clipped on and got knocked over board. Took us about 25 minutes to get them back onboard and 3 hours to sort out the lines etc.
In terms of encounters, huge groups of luminous jelly fish are pretty weird to see at night. Curious whales/dolphins are really cool.
Probably the sketchiest is coming close to container ships during the night, those things don't change course unless it's essential.
11.
When you're in the middle of the ocean and realise that if you got dumped in the water it is likely that no one would even notice you missing for a while and it's a big f**king ocean to go looking in for one guy.
10.
50-odd miles offshore on a sailboat, pitch black. Suddenly we hear a loud "CRACK" and the boat shifts an inch to port. Then silence for twenty minutes followed by another loud "THUMP" and boat shudder. Made our way quickly back to the coast. In dry dock there was a 2 foot diameter dent in the hull.
I'm guessing a sleeping whale.
I heard what I'm assuming is a whale breaching while it was pitch dark.
It'd be cool if I could see it, but at night when I have no idea what's out there it was kind of spooky. Sounded like a lot of water shifting around and big splashes in the dark. I don't see what else it could've been.
9.
Two situations:
I was on a tanker somewhere in the middle of Indian Ocean. Graveyard watch, fairly good weather, good visibility. I notice a lighthouse light ahead of me, looks far but it is very distinct, flashes rhythmically, quite bright. I check the Radar, nothing. I check the chart nothing for at least 400 miles. I continue to observe until it just stops abruptly. Freaked me out a bit.
Waters near philippines, quiet watch, few fishing boats in the area. Suddenly i notice a very faint light dead ahead of me, looks very very far, nothing on radar, can barely see it. I thought i have some time until it shows up on Radar but something was telling me to alter course to starboard. So i did and 1 minute after the alteration i was passing a tiny fishing boat by about 200m with one guy with a sh*tty torch on board. If i didn't act on my instinct i would have ran him over.
8.
The actual dark. It is pitch black out in the middle of the ocean. That can be quite unnerving. On the upside on cloudless nights the night sky is breathtaking.
The water is also breathtaking as well.
Yeah but that's on the downside.
7.
Full disclosure, this is not directly sailing related. But I am a sailor and have a creepy night time ocean experience to share.
While guiding a night dive once, we had a massive female seven gill shark follow us for the whole dive, just occasionally coming into our visibility before darting off.
She was probably just curious of our lights or maybe using them to hunt but it was just really unnerving to know she was around but unable to see her.
That being said, I love sharks, and she did us no harm. They're usually super chill and not to be feared. But you can't help but respect any predator bigger than you are who while it follows you around in the dark.
6.
Out at sea at night no moon, pitch black. I'm talking shootin the sh*t with a shipmate and out of nowhere whap!!!! The loudest slap I have ever heard. My buddy literally screams. WTF!!!! A flying fish, right in the face. That was 40 years ago. I'm still laughing.
5.
Sailing just a couple miles off the Norwegian coast, in an old 14' dinghy all by my lonesome. Well, «sailing» is the wrong word; I was drifting in near zero wind, barely making a knot of headway. That's why I was still out there; I had planned to spend the night on a small island but getting there took forever and it got pitch dark.
No matter, I was safe enough and it was kind of nice to have the nighttime ocean all to myself, not a ship in sight anywhere. I had oars and could have rowed to my destination in an hour or so but didn't feel like there was any need to hurry (had left the outboard motor ashore because of hunting laws against shooting from a motorized vessel, and I was going after migrating geese). At my position it was calm and quiet, but all around the horizon I saw flashes of lightning so far off that I heard no thunder.
As I relaxed and enjoyed the quiet spectacle of distant lightning, all of a sudden I heard someone or something draw a laboured breath right next to me. It was unmistakably the sound of breathing, like from a half- strangled person taking a deep breath of much-needed air. Not gonna lie, I briefly panicked before I realized it had to be some marine mammal surfacing for air close to my boat. Guessing it was a harbour porpoise as they are common here, but I never saw it in the darkness.
Heard it again a few times, sounded like it moved further away and there may have been more than one based on the frequency. Of course sound carries far at night, but it really did sound like that initial breath was right behind me, close enough to touch.
Shortly after the breathing sounds disappeared, the wind picked up out of nowhere and I had to scramble to adjust rigging. Made it to the correct island and made landfall about 20 minutes later, having gone from idly drifting on the current to skipping over the waves in a few heartbeats. I guess that distant storm dropped by to say hello.
4.
Coming through a part of the Mediterranean with a lot of oil platforms, at night, I was conn, one of the other ensigns was JOOD, and our Navigator was OOD. Nav ducked into the chartroom, so it was just me and the JOOD when we saw what looked like another oil platform on the horizon. Only it wasn't showing up on either of our radars, it wasn't on the chart, and the laser rangefinder wasn't working.
So the two of us are watching this thing get closer and closer, and we were about to call the captain up to the bridge (JOOD had just picked up the phone) when Nav walks back into the pilothouse, takes one look at the two of us freaking out and goes "...you guys know that's the moon, right?"
The quartermasters left that one out of the deck log.
3.
Not a sailor, but I was once on a small research vessel for 37 days.
I don't know the specifics, but we were about half way into our trip when we lost all power. It was night, and I was woken up my people shouting and loud banging. It wasn't panic or danger, it very clearly sound like frustrated problem solving and crankiness.
Anyway, it's f**king black. Everything is pitch black. There some emergency safety lights here and there, but it's mostly just red indicators with small strobes at the bottom of doorways.
People are walking around below deck setting up wind up lanterns, taping flashlights to water bottles (makes a nice lantern) and trying to figure out what's going on.
It's dead quiet except for what noise we are making. No current. No waves. No wind. No moon. We are in the middle of nowhere. Black and silence. It was deafeningly silent.
Grabbing my head light I make my way up to the rear deck. It was like walking into a wall of nothing.
I've never felt so out of space and disoriented. My head light illuminated the deck and the sky was brilliant with stars. It truly is amazing to be out there with no light and just the unimaginable vastness of space. The thing is, my head light messes with my night vision.
So I turned it off as I look out to the black horizon, where it ought to be. Shouldn't take long for my eyes to adjust and then I'll be able to make out the shimmer of starlight refracting across the calm waters.
The ships lights flicker on and my star gazing is cut short. Sucks. Holding the railing while walking back to the cabin door, the lights cut out again. I keep walking.
I feel, for a moment, the most intense disorientation overwhelm my senses. My eyes only see black. The briefness of the ships lights was enough to close down my irises. My inner ear, already uneasy from weeks on the sea, spun and flips as upper back smacked into the water.
I was overboard and it felt like forever entering that water. The panic of immersion and no direction. I flailed and I was underwater, cold and black.
That was probably one of the worst experiences I've ever had.
The ships lights came back on as I found the surface. I'm sure it was only seconds, and it was only minutes until I was hoisted out of the water and it was years ago yet everyone still won't let me forget that time I fell overboard.
Cool.
2.
This happened in 1986, my wife and I were two days out of the Azores headed to Newport, RI. We were in our 60' Dutch built wooden trawler bringing it to the USA. It was green.
It was a gorgeous night, 1/4 moon, gazillions of stars, big pod of dolphins playing in our bow wake, phosphorescent seas all around us, flying fish bouncing off the cabin. Our wake was visible for at least a mile behind us, glowing in the night.
That night I had the Middle watch, about 0330 I decided that since there were no running lights on the horizon and we were 200 miles south of the shipping lanes that it would be OK to turn our running lights off so I could really enjoy the spectacular light show Mother Nature was providing. Even woke the wife up early so she could see the light show outside.
About 5 minutes later an American voice booms over the radio; "Will the green fishing boat please turn your lights back on!". They didn't answer my question asking who they were.
There were no boats visible anywhere. No wakes, no glow! To this day I don't know who made the broadcast. When the sun came up there were no ships in sight.
300+ miles from the nearest piece of dirt, someone was watching us!
BIG BROTHER IS EVERYWHERE!
Highly doubt it was a sub, they aren't going to break radio silence for something that minor.
Willing to bet a Navy P-3 saw you while they were out on patrol and decided to mess with you/"enforce maritime law". They usually flew out of either Rota or the Azores IIRC back then. They can fly far enough away from you that you won't hear or see them while still seeing you with their optics. Guessing they saw you turn the lights off and thought "hey, watch this!" because the majority of those patrols were/are incredibly mundane and boring.
1.
I was onboard the USS Rueben James in 2012. I was standing watch in combat and decided to take a smoke break on the starboard side wind break at 3am. It was cloudy so almost pitch black. I had gone down at this time on many occasions and there are usually 1 or 2 other people up that late going out for a smoke break. When I got out there I could see nothing but the cherry of someone else's cig. I face outward and leaned on the break and lit my camel gold and asked how his night was going, having no idea who I was speaking to but figuring I would find out when I heard his voice/description of his night.
I got no response.
I turned around to see if he had heard me and with my eyes adjusted I would have been able to make him out leaning against the steel wall. As I turned around the moon cracked out from the clouds and slightly illuminated the small confined area I was in and the only 2 directions anyone could have walked away. There was no one there. I was alone. I had seen the cigarette and the exhale of smoke from someone on that wind break but no one was there and no one could have left the smoke deck without my hearing or seeing them. I don't believe in ghost or the afterlife or any of that nonsense but needless to say I didn't stick around outside for long.
Have you ever had a freaky experience on the open sea at night?
Adults Who Still Need A Stuffed Animal To Go To Sleep Share Their Experiences
Reddit user Old-Horse1185 asked: '34 percent of adults sleep with a stuffed animal or other sentimental object. Are you one of these people? What do you sleep with?'
Stuffies, plushies, stuffed animals, or plush toys; whatever you might call them, we likely all can remember a fluffy friend we had in our childhood.
But some adults might have carried their childhood friend into adulthood, or even made others along the way, and they might even still go to sleep with them at night, too.
Redditor Old-Horse1185 asked:
"34 percent of adults sleep with a stuffed animal or other sentimental objects."
"Are you one of these people? What do you sleep with?"
The Twin Bond
"My twin sister died when I was 18. Ten years later, I still sleep with her unicorn pillow pet, she gets a nice spot on the bed, and I'd never be with someone who made me feel bad about having it. Only my girlfriend is trusted enough to give pillow pet a bath."
- insomniacinsanity
"My twin brother died when we were seven, and I used to have a specific stuffie that was given to him by an American lady who worked in the hospital he was in, but it got damaged in a house move when I was a teenager and was unsalvageable."
"It was a limited-run stuffie that you could only get in a specific American store in the 90s, so it was basically irreplaceable. My husband, 10+ years later and without letting on, tracked one down and paid a silly amount of money to have it shipped to the UK and gave it to me for Christmas a couple of years ago."
"I sleep with it every d**n night. I'm mid-30s, and I'll never stop."
- beesandsids
Keeping Them Close
"My partner passed away a few weeks ago, and I now cuddle his shirts that still have his scent. When my son spends the night with his grandparents, I also cuddle w his blanket or the pillow he sleeps on."
- anonmomanonnin
Cuddles and Fidgets
"My grandma made me a pillow when I was born. She sewed the pillow together and the pillow case, which had kittens all over it."
"I’m 33 years now she passed when I was 31, and I sleep with the same pillow in my arms every night."
"The pillow case is worn to bits because I guess I use it as a fidget thing I rub in between my fingers. Yes, I’m weird."
- Valuable_Panda_4228
From the Beyond
"I bought my wife a big stuffed seal for our first Valentine's Day. This seal has a slight green tint to it, so we named him Sealo Green. She had Sealo for a couple of years before she passed away."
"I hug Seal-o every night and pray to my wife, tell her about my day, things coming up, etc. I'll start using her perfume on Sealo soon, so I can smell her while I pray to her. My heart can't take it right now."
- Cubbycupcake-Uther
A Gift from Grandma
"I am one. My grandma gave all the grandkids a cat plush. A cat food brand had a promotion, if you bought enough cat food you'd get a free plushie. With 14 grandkids, a lot of food was bought to get there. Her cats didn't complain though, lol (laughing out loud)."
"I still sleep with it, it's a feeling of comfort, safety, and home."
- DavyJonesLocker2
An Evolving Friendship
"Stuffed dog I've had since my mom was squeezing him while giving birth to me. That dog has seen some s**t."
"He's a 'Sad Sam,' and his eyes used to break my heart when I was a kid, so I buried him under other stuffed animals or made him face the wall so I wouldn't have to look at him."
"Then I felt really guilty because I didn't want him to feel punished when all he wanted was to be loved. So I've been sleeping with him for almost 40 years now."
"I recently bought an original one off eBay to see the comparison and man, I have loved the daylights out of that dog!"
- dumdadumdumAHHH
A Special Bond
"I now sleep with my girlfriend's stuffed bunny she has had since birth. He’s my best friend now! I love you, Bootstin!!"
- silversauce
"Aww, that's awesome. My partner is the only person I've ever been with who didn't make me feel like crap for still having my blanket. When I travel, I leave it with them, and I think they probably cuddle up with it as much as I do after a rough day."
- the_Ozz
Keeping a Partner Close
"Sometimes when I take a nap and my wife doesn't, I'll take her pillow to sleep with because I like the smell."
"It smells like baby powder, vanilla, and her."
- TrailerParkPrepper
Very Considerate
"Huge jellycat bears. I don’t even wanna, but I’m just afraid I’ll hurt their feelings if I don’t."
- CommonAd9606
"As a kid, I routinely slept with a zillion stuffed animals on the bed because I didn’t want any of them to feel left out."
- PumaGranite
"As a kid? I'm 26 and still have to hug them all as I go to sleep or they'll feel left out!"
- Scymber
Lower Back Pain
"I sleep with a body pillow (plain cover). Doctor recommended it a few years ago to help with my lower back pain and it really does help."
- HappyTimeHollis
"I sleep with a body pillow but it's an alligator. My grandparents gave it to me when I was 11 years old. It has a huge open mouth you can put your arm through or use to prop your phone. Had it 24 years. Love it to death."
- smoretank
Full Body Support
"Squishmallows. I have sciatica and they're great for when I go to bed. I put one between my knees at night (side sleeper) and I snuggle up with one."
- Raging_Utahn
Happy Kitty, Sleepy Kitty
"I'm not one to sleep with plushies, but my cat likes to snuggle up to me and sleep with his fluffy little head on my shoulder."
- imaybeacatIRL
"Cats have to count. My previous cat actually slept as the little spoon, snuggled in my arms."
- disapprovingfox
The Long-Distance Relationship
"I am a guy, I recently got to sleep with a stuffed animal for a week, I won't go into the details as to why or how, just know that I lovvveeeed it. I would get called a weirdo if I confess to this to the world, so I have kept this to myself and my bestie only."
"The stuffed animal was a large teddy bear, since then it has been taken away and now it is placed in the living room, my bedroom has one small stuffed toy that I sleep with, it's not super large and not as comfortable as the teddy but it works."
"It makes me feel good and less alone, the closest person in the world to me is 700km away, what I'm about to say is weird but hugging the teddy and pretending it's her makes me calm and makes me want to sleep."
- uninformed-but-smart
Build a Friend... with IKEA
"Ikea Hippo, Ikea Elephant. The Ikea bigs are the superior sleep companion. I also have the shark, but he is not right for my shoulder when cuddling so he guards."
- pm-me-neckbeards
"I also keep my Ikea shark on guard at night! The Ikea octopus is the guard when I sleep at my boyfriend’s house."
- jeff-buckleys-teeth
A Comfort Become Real
"When I was a toddler, I got a stuffed animal as a present from my uncle. It was a light brown rabbit with button eyes and ears with rainbow stripes on the inside. I'm unsure of when I got it, but I was either one to two years old or four years old."
"I don't know how or why, but it had a distinct scent, not particularly noticeable unless you shoved your face in its fur, like I did, haha. As I grew up, I needed to have this rabbit with me or I would not be able to sleep. I remember this one time when I couldn't find it in time for bed, and I was so distressed trying to fall asleep that I started hallucinating."
"Over time she lost an eye, her ears became frayed, her fur fell out in patches, and she looks like a well-loved creature (because she is) or hot garbage, depending on who you ask."
" Even in my rebellious teen years, I couldn't pretend to dislike her because the scent and texture of her fur gave me a feeling of comfort and safety, even when it felt like everyone was against me."
"I live by myself now at age 34 and you better believe I still keep her in my bed. The scent is gone but sometimes I can trick my brain into thinking it's still there, and when I touch the texture of her fur, I will still get a wave of comfort and reassurance the same way I did as a child."
"It's amazing not only how humans will bond with anything, but also the effect these things will have on a person."
"This got sappy, my apologies."
"PS: Her name is Ninni."
- Mwuuh
"'Real isn't how you are made,' said the Skin Horse. 'It's a thing that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you, then you become Real.'"
"I'm reminded of this quote from 'The Velveteen Rabbit.'"
- tinycole2971
While everyone might feel a little silly about their sleeping arrangements, most of those who still sleep with a cuddly friend have spent a great deal of their life with their companion already.
From sentimental reasons to physical needs, everyone needs comforted from time to time, and there's nothing quite like the unconditional love of a favorite stuffie friend.
Working remotely from home certainly has its advantages, including not having to endure traffic and deal with coworker drama.
But many people found that during the pandemic, the isolation of working from home left little to be desired.
People who have jobs requiring them to commute every day and arrive at the workplace are given the opportunity to be social and feel like they're a part of society.
But being a part of a work environment can come with its own unique occupational hazards.
Curious to hear from strangers in the workforce, Redditor AMGBOI69420 asked:
"What’s the most f'ked up thing you’ve seen at work?"
People in medical professions draw on their endless list of shocking events.
The Crazy Patient
"I was sorting all the psych patients that were hospitalized in my state, and got to this guy: a teenager or maybe a bit older, and he got sent to the ward because he suddenly got aggressive and started to have some episodes that he squirmed in pain/took off his clothes and things like that. Before being hospitalized he was complaining about these things, but nothing the medics did was working and nothing wrong was found, so it should be a psychiatric issue, no?"
"Wrong, he was put in the ward for 2 or so years and lost a lot of his life, being considered insane, because he developed a rare spinal cancer that was hard to detect and caused him extreme pain. Really f'ked up, I don't remember what happened to him afterward, but I not really optimistic that it had an happy ending."
– vtomal
The First Aid Officer Who Couldn't Unsee These
"I was a first aid officer in a corporate job."
"Elderly pedestrian hit by a car in our car park: compound tib fib fracture that tore through her calf muscle"
"Deep laceration with arterial bleeding after some idiot from another department tripped and dropped a metal first aid down a flight of stairs during a fire drill."
– W2ttsy
Patient Left Against Medical Advice
"Patient comes in to the ER, gets full sepsis workup. His chemistries are all f'ked up, he required a manual white cell count because his was so high the analyzer basically said 'WTF?!', his urine was full of white cells and bacteria. You know, your classic 'old person UTI that's gone septic.' We figure he's going to be admitted. Nope, they send him home. Mind you, this was not a case of 'patient left AMA (against medical advice),' this was just the doctor said 'Yeah, seems like you've got a UTI. Go home and drink some cranberry juice.'"
"Two days later, the same patient comes in, with the same complaint. Gets the same blood and urine tests. While I'm doing the manual white cell count, the phone rings. It's the reference lab down the street. The blood cultures on the patient I'm currently working on from two days prior have come up positive. I take the notification and call the ER to let them know. Us labbies figure he's going to be admitted for sure this time. Come to find out, they sent him home again. (Again, not an AMA, a 'Go home and drink some cranberry juice.')"
– coffeeblossom
Those in customer service share their shocking eye-witness accounts.
Trailblazer
"I worked at one of the busiest Walmarts in the country during Spring Break for 6 years... I wouldn't even know where to begin."
"I guess the drunk lady leaving the bathroom with her pants around her ankles while actively sh*tting as she walked across the front of the building and back outside into the wild."
"None of the workers wanted to deal with it so they parked a shopping cart over each turd until the cleaning crew came in."
– UncleGrako
Slimy Salespeople
"Worked at a Nissan dealership where most salespeople where slimy POS. One senior citizen with a veteran ballcap was working on a deal for a car for his grandkid. Nice old guy got tired and fell asleep in the chair waiting for the salesguy to work out the deal with the sales managers. One of the managers from the bullpen walks by and farts right in the sleeping old mans face then runs back to the bullpen where everyone was watching and laughing. It was disgusting, I told the sales guy who I knew was a Iraq vet. He went to the bull pen and screamed in the face of every single one of those f'kers. He screamed so much at them I thought he was gonna pass out."
– adrielago
Work environments can be extremely dangerous.
"Once saw someone step into a bucket of hot fryer oil, it got into their shoes and everything. Was so bad that when they took the shoe off it peeled of skin with it. The person had 2nd and I believe 3rd degree burns. He never came back but I saw the pictures and it was horrific."
– Mrlionscruff
"I worked at a printing manufacturer and saw something like this happen in person, the guy had his right arm shredded. The wrench in his other hand stopping the machine is the only reason he didn't go all the way through. Later that month a 2400lbs paper roll was dropped on a coworker in front of me. I'm glad to be out of that job."
– Beullersghost
Threatening The Employee
"I worked at a Goodwill for a few years, we had lots of drug addicts trying to shoot up in the changing room and had an occasional OD."
"But the most shocking thing I experienced was the amount of times people physically threatened or attacked me or my co-workers when we refused their donations. Getting in our faces and trying to push us around, one guy tried to hit someone with a car. Another one threw a picture frame that narrowly missed smashing my supervisor's head, another threw such a temper tantrum that he smashed an entire set of chairs and a kitchen table."
"There was also someone who called the police because we changed the prices on soft-cover books."
– carefulwithyrbananas
T.M.I.
"Saw one guy drop dead (office job)"
"One get an arm cut off (Pulp mill)"
"One get de-gloved (Paper mill)"
"But the winner was the day we walked into work at an auto parts store and found the assistant manager f'king another assistant manager. Just going at it."
– Bigdaddyjlove1
Mechanical Nightmare
"Box cutting job saw a guy die after losing his arm to the machine. I still to this day dont know how my room mate at the time kept going to work for another few weeks before quitting."
"We'd go to work stoned off our a**es everyday. And seeing that guy die was a nope for me. I knew it was far to easy for the same mistake to happen to me stoned. Wasn't gonna get sucked in and die for 15 bucks an hr."
"Any heavy machinery related jobs since Ive made sure to ask about work related accidents and how common they are along with when the last one happened."
– idontneedjug
When I was a parade performer at certain theme park, we performed on a day when it was reportedly record-breaking heat, and some of my fellow performers who were dancing atop a couple of the floats collapsed and passed out from heat stroke in view of guests.
It was the scariest thing to see several paramedics bursting onto the scene and taking these unconscious young performers being carried away in stretchers.
Since then, the park instituted a code-90 protocol where the choreography was modified whenever the temperature hit 90 degrees.
Be it desperation, self-indulgence, or simply optimism, many people never leave home without a condom.
If the chances of "getting lucky" are much more likely at some places than others, one never knows where or when they might hit it off with someone.
Including a funeral.
Bizarre and tasteless as that sounds, a recent study reportedly showed that 1 in 8 men under the age of 35 do, in fact, bring condoms with them when attending a funeral, "just in case".
Whether or not these condoms were used, however, is another story entirely.
"After a recent study found 1 in 8 men under 35 admit to taking condoms to funerals "just in case", what's your experience with this?"
Select Crowd...
"I went to my grandma's funeral and hit it off with this hot nurse."
"Things were going great until my brother pulled me aside and said it was my second cousin."
'You know who shows up at funerals for old people? "
"Family members."- bumblef**kglobal
"I remember seeing a really hot chick at my grandmother's funeral."
"Immediately thought was I should chat her up."
"Then my brain went to, 'What if she's family and we just never met?'"
"I just went back to mourning."- VideoGameDana
Okay then...
"Once I was dating a girl whose dad absolutely forbid us from dating."
"Like, would lock his daughter in her room and take her phone to make sure we did not communicate."
"She told me when we spoke for a moment at Starbucks that she would date me if her dad was out of the picture."
"He died is a car crash on the freeway, and since her mom liked me invited me to the funeral."
"My girl and I sat next to each other at the funeral and couldn't wait, got it on in the parking lot of the funeral home."
"Condom was necessary."- crunchysquare
car studio GIF by ZI ItalyGiphyNever The Funeral, Always The Wake
"Ngl, some of the best parties I’ve been to have been wakes."
"In no way disrespectful, they were a celebration of the person’s life and also a massive tension release after grimness of the funeral itself."
"So I’m not surprised some people take a condom just in case."
"I’ve never done it, but I didn’t often expect to get laid regardless of situation."- Goryokaku
Oops...
"Proudly in the 7 out of 8 camp."
"But the 1 in 8 aren’t wrong."
"Heard through the family grapevine that one of my female cousins met a dude at a funeral and they banged it out the same night."
"Also turns out they were related (what’re the odds at the funeral of a relative? )."
"Distant enough they would never see each other again (different branches of her family), close enough that their family photo albums have overlapping people."- ESQBOJaguar
If You Really Think About It...
"Biologically speaking mourning/death triggers mating instincts as though that death tells the lizard brain in us that we need to procreate because death is scary."
"Scum'ically speaking, funerals typically leave people especially women in a state of fragility that leaves them vulnerable to suggestion and coercion."
"Socially speaking, some people, both men and women, seek comfort and company after/during a mourning period and when two people engage in comforting each other emotionally through a death it can trigger chemicals in the brain that cause the idea of connection or chemistry which can inevitably lead to copulation."- KURO-K1SH1
Season 18 Episode 3 GIF by The SimpsonsGiphyBetter Safe Than Sorry!
"If you forget to bring a condom you increase the chance of casual sex with 10.000%."
"It’s a well-known fact."- Mukkeman
Not Just Men...
"I'm not a man and I've taken condoms 'just in case' pretty much anywhere."
"I've told folks to take condoms 'just in case' to a festival who I was sure would never have a one night stand and who I had never even seen mingle with any man/woman."
"It's a safety."
"The thing costs less than a dollar, but if anything somehow would happen, not having it could cost you your healthiness or independence/freedom due to a child being your new responsibility."
"Unless you absolutely, 100% am sure you will not be having sex that day, and no one will be able to change your mind - carry a condom."
"And having visited a funeral is likely not impactful enough to everyone to make them absolutely sure of that."-deterministic_lynx
It Is, Indeed, A Source Of Comfort...
"I'm a woman, but I'm going to point out that grief affects everyone differently."
"Some people get an intense need for sex when they are grieving, I speak from experience here."
"Perhaps they're carrying them everywhere already, but choosing to take some specifically to a funeral makes perfect sense to me."- Sexy-Snowflake
"My bf's son died, and his sex drive was significantly higher around that time period, I think it's just a way men deal with stress."- Arielxxxlee
"There is no 'wrong' way to grieve."- Noctudeit
Sexy Ava Gardner GIF by Turner Classic MoviesGiphyAlways Listen To Your Mother...
"When I turned 15 my mom told me to always have a condom in my wallet just in case."
"That was before people realized it was really bad to keep it in your wallet."
"So yeah I’ve been pretty much everywhere with one 'just in case'."- euphoria110
If It's Already There, Why Take It Out?
"I do too."
"I'm not going to remove the random condom that is in my wallet just because I'm going to a funeral."
"Not that I ever needed one, I'm still a virgin BTW."- azarbi
When One Life Ends, Another Begins...
"I’ve heard that the proximity of death increases the desire to make new life."
"Anecdotally, my FIL and MIL met at a funeral and 9 months later my husband was born."- KerouacsGirlfriend
Lionel Messi Hug GIF by FC BarcelonaGiphyNot SPECIFICALLY Funerals...
"We bring condoms everywhere, 'just in case', not only the funeral, you silly!"- WeetIkVeelNL
No one should be judged if they happen to have a condom with them when attending a funeral.
After all, should the moment arise, better to be prepared and safe.
On the other hand, if any of these people are attending the funeral with the intention of "getting lucky", that's just... yeah...
The Best Real-Life Examples Of 'Never Interrupt An Enemy While They're Making A Mistake'
People will trip themselves up eventually.
Because liars and lunatics always make mistakes.
They may be small mistakes, but they leave just enough room to expose their wicked ways.
Sure we all want to fight off an enemy and be the victor.
But sometimes the victor's greatest weapon is nothing but a little patience.
Then, we celebrate with a smile as we watch the crumble.
And maybe we have a little victory dance.
Redditor Spinksy48 wanted to understand the fun of letting your opponent lose by just doing nothing, so they asked:
"What is your 'never interrupt an enemy while they are making a mistake' moment?"
If the story starts to get really crazy, just wait for a break.
Then ask a question from the beginning.
I guarantee you know more of the lie than they do.
Just keep talking, friend.
Gotcha
Dashcam Hello GIF by TranscendGiphy"I let the lady who changed lanes into me run her mouth about how I rear-ended her before pulling the cop aside to show him my DashCam footage."
ThrowingChicken
A Cherry Wave
"I was accused by a neighbor of reversing out of my drive and hitting his car. He gave me the date and time I had allegedly done it and pointed to a (small) scrape on my car that supposedly matched perfectly the location of the dent on his. This was 7 weeks after the alleged event, by the way."
"I said it wasn't me but told him to contact his insurance and we'd see what they said. A few weeks later I get a letter from my insurance asking what had happened, to which I responded with the date I had bought my car (and updated my insurance) - two weeks after the supposed bump."
"He never spoke to me again but I used to give him a cheery wave every time I saw him glowering at his window."
Gazcobain
Speak Once
"In a meeting with my project manager who has not been in the office or worked a proper full day for MONTHS, she has increasingly been annoyed by people bypassing her to get things done by telling me and her other direct reports what to do."
"I was about to answer a question for stakeholders, and she told me to let her speak one sentence and will let me have my bit. I did as I was told, and she told the stakeholder a completely wrong thing about the system we were handling and made a complete fool out of herself. She got sacked this month."
choiaera
We Hated Each Other
"Guy stole a presentation from me, this is 25 years ago. We hated each other. When he started presenting I realized I had made a huge error, didn’t say anything. Let him get through it. Asked him about the error, but he couldn’t answer. This was in front of COO. Got fired, not for just that, he was an overall douche. This was before everyone was on PCs, and had one printer in one room."
Bmilvis
Whoops
Office Space GIF by 20th Century Fox Home EntertainmentGiphy"When a coworker who I hated got fired a few weeks after I decided to stop fixing his mistakes even if it impacted a client."
Hrekires
It's always thrilling to see the bad colleagues go!
Bye. Bye. Bye.
I will see you on the 15th
Idiot Reaction GIFGiphy"Not my story, but several years ago my older brother was fighting for custody of his son with his ex-wife. As the first custody hearing date approached, they were exchanging [un]pleasantries over text and my brother ended up saying something along the lines of, 'I'm not continuing this conversation. I will see you on the 15th.' The ex-wife told him, 'The hearing is on the 25th dumba**.'"
"So of course instead of correcting her, my brother just allowed her to keep thinking it was the wrong date, and she missed the first hearing entirely. It became the first of many mistakes she made in the court system that eventually led to my brother and the woman who is now his second wife winning full custody of his son."
Damn_Furries
Follow the Prints
"I'm working on a job site and the architect is there one day. I've been given some light fixtures for the sconces in a leasing office lobby. The fixtures are meant to be hung from a ceiling, they can't be installed on a wall. I attempt to convey this to the architect, but he brushes me off and just tells me to follow the prints."
"I turn to the apprentice and say, well you heard the man, put them up. A bit later, we hear the crashing of glass. The architect asks what was that? I said your light fixture. As I picked up a broom and dustpan to go clean up."
Ohhhhhhthehumanity
No Debt
"As I was being fired from a job, the district manager requested we record the conversation. He thought I was gonna be very upset, so I obliged. Then when he started to tell me why I was being fired he started with, 'You are gonna be graduating college soon, and we want to make sure we get ahead of you leaving us.'"
"I very calmly asked him to send me the recording right after he said that. Then later that day I called a lawyer. I now have no student loan debt."
JRTHEAMAZING
The Screams
"I reminded my ex-wife the divorce court was the next day and was invited to Get F**ked. So I went by myself, she failed to appear and pissed off the Judge so he asked what would be my desired outcome for assets and Custody of the kids. He wrote down whatever I wanted and I could hear her screams when she read the Orders from 3500km away."
comfortablynumb15
Silence
"There's a thing in law enforcement/legalese called a spontaneous utterance. Many many people will bury their own cases with these while bi*ching and moaning at their arresting officer on the way to jail."
raccoonsonbicycles
That last one is good knowledge to have in the back pocket.