We tend to think of "rich" as some sort of destination or goal post. It's a place we work hard to get to, and once we get there we're good. Rags to riches story over. Somebody turn it into an inspirational movie with a strings-heavy soundtrack.
But what about riches to rags stories? Do they really happen?
One Reddit user asked:
Ex-rich people of Reddit, when did you lose everything?
And yeah, pretty much none of it played out like the Goldie Hawn classic, Overboard. The real world is much, much crueler and doesn't involve anywhere near as much amnesia.
Millionaire For A Moment
My ex had a friend who inherited a million dollars in cash and near-cash assets when his only parent died. He was 20 years old.
Now, you aren't just going to retire at 20 on a million bucks - but it's a great way to pay for college, maybe buy a car and a down payment on a house, and save/invest the rest. Basically, it's a really good way to start your adult life and nearly ensure you'll be quite wealthy in your later years.
Did he do any of that? Nope.
He bought himself a ridiculous luxury car, bought cars for his friends, bought wardrobes of designer clothes, threw huge parties repeatedly, etc. Ended up broke in two or three years and went back to waiting tables to make rent.
Sad to see.
- 05110909
Dad Was Cooking The Books
Growing up, my best friends family was extremely well to do. I'm talking running with the bulls in Spain, private jets to Aspen to ski kind of rich. My friend had every toy, gaming console, and cool piece of clothing imaginable.
Right before our senior year of highschool, my friend's dad ended his life.
Turns out he was cooking the books at his business as well as falsifying his his taxes. The company was basically worth nothing. He was looking at 30 years in prison, so he just decided to end it all.
My best friend went from a 6,500 square foot mansion on the water to a 1,200 square foot apartment with his mom and two siblings.
He eventually adjusted to being normal like the rest of us and he is still my best friend.
Would Have Been Set For Life
fox tv marcus pierce GIF by Lucifer
Giphy
Maybe not exactly rich, but my sister would have been set for life. Her father died from cancer and she lost both her eyes to cancer at the age of 6 months. The way things were set up, she was going to be able to draw her father's social security the rest of her life so long as she never married and had a full ride to an all blind college, dorm and everything, paid for through scholarships.
She was a really smart, straight A student and she was going to be a court stenographer. So, this pay combined with the social security may not have made her exactly rich, but she would have been extremely comfortable in life/close to rich.
A little white before she was suppose to leave for college, my parents found a note on to the front door. It was from her and her new husband.
She had ran off and gotten eloped! Right out of high school!
He discouraged her from going to college. The man was 20 years older than her, about a year or two older than my mother. He later admitted he wanted to marry my sister because he knew she'd be able to draw a disability check.
So, not only did she lose her scholarships, but she also lost her father's social security before she even received the first check from it. And that man got her involved in a lot of drugs.
He was a man from the local church that basically manipulated my sister and did that thing that most abusers do by making the person they're targeting feel incredibly special and desirable. My sister, being only 18, I think 16-17 when they met, took the bait.
They divorced and she's clean now, had been for a few good years. But now has to live off her disability check and food stamps.
She talks a lot about how she wished she had just gone off to college and it's sad to see how one bad choice changed everything. She really encourages her daughters to focus on education and was one of the driving forces that encouraged me to get my GED when I dropped out of high school.
I Don't Regret It At All
I wasn't "rich" but comfortably upper middle-class. If I wanted to spend my birthday in Paris, I could, for example.
However, I was in a toxic marriage and had been out of the workforce for years raising my children. Once they were older, I got help for my depression and got out of the toxic marriage. At the time I worked for a local newspaper and was able to put a down payment on a modest house for myself and the kids.
Then the housing market crashed. Then the print news market crashed. Then my ex-husband withheld child support. I had several VERY lean years while I built up my own business, and it was incredibly hard.
But you know what? I don't regret it at all. I came through to the other side a stronger, much happier person. I have a great relationship with my now-grown children and their children. My income isn't impressive, but I have what I need. I can stand on my own two feet and overcome adversity. Looking back, I wouldn't trade the experience of the last 15 years for anything.
Taking The Breakup Badly
I wouldn't say I was rich but I had a job that paid $120,000 year working quality control for a pavement company. My girlfriend of 10 years (who I was about to propose to) left me out of the blue.
I had bought a ring. I saved up enough money to help with the wedding and even enough to put down on a decent condo for a starter home.
Anyway after she left me I fell into drugs and alcohol and ended up losing my job.
I also got into a car accident when driving drunk. I hit a concrete barrier and only hurt myself, thank god. Don't drink and drive.
Believe it or not I still kept drinking.
I broke my my back and shoulder blade in an atv accident - again I was drunk as f*ck. Now I'm held together by pins and needles and am in constant pain.
I can't do labor work anymore and now make minimum wage in the food industry. I lost 3 more jobs due to drugs and alcohol before I finally checked myself into rehab.
The Bosnian War
I have never been rich, but my family was well above average when I was a kid. My father was a mechanic and in 1981 he bought a car repair shop that made us money pretty well.
Then in 1992 the Bosnian war started and our hometown of Sarajevo was put under a siege that lasted until 1996.
In 1994 we were able to escape the city and move into a refugee camp. When the war ended we returned to Sarajevo and my father's car repair shop as well as our home were in total ruins after all the artillery and mortar fire.
We were able to get a new home fairly quickly with the help of some of our relatives, but we never got the car repair shop fixed. It was in such bad condition we just demolished it after we had sold all found scrap metal and usable tools.
Riches To Rags To Riches Again
My parents had built up a multi-million dollar company over a couple decades before and during my early childhood.
Around 2006 they separated and ran each other dry in court. Then the crash came and bankrupted both of them and they lost everything they put years into.
After my mother's parents passed away she was able to take a portion of an investment account that built millions from her father's stock from working in the railroad industry.
My father rebuilt his business from scratch repaired his credit and has grown it bigger than it ever was before.
By the age of 21 I've witnessed my life go from rich to broke to wealthy. I am in a great position in life now for my age, but work, plan, live and learn like everything could be again gone in the blink of an eye.
Expensive, But Cool
twins yes GIF
Giphy
"Congratulations! You're having twins!"
Wasn't rich but doing pretty good...but damn kids are expensive. But they're cool so all is good. Who needs to travel anyway?
Dissolved A Thriving Company
During this year's outbreak, after I gave out my company's final cash flow to employees, we dissolved the thriving international trade company, and I ended up the same.
Although the company has no employees, I still stick to it and don't want to give up the support of our international customers. I never give up, but this year is not good.
- JD868
An Alzheimer's Donation
My Grandma lost it all because of her Alzheimer's. She inherited most of the money from her husband when he passed. It totaled a bit over $2mil with about $150k divided between the 5 children.
My father (her son) does everything for her as she is 93 and has severe Alzheimer's. The plan was to split the money equally between the 5 children when it was her time.
About 2 years ago she started asking my father for money to pay for groceries and other random little things. He got curious about why she would need money and checked the bank account with the inheritance in it.
It was all gone.
She had gotten the approval to empty the account from the bank - without my father's consent. That consent was supposed to happen given her mental state.
She donated everything to the Catholic Church...
Not saying that is a bad use of the money, but could've been used to improve the lives of her children, grandchildren, and great grandchildren.
Marry Back Into Wealth
Family was wealthy - or more precisely my grandfather was wealthy. Somewhere in the mid 7 figure range.
My grandfather started his own company and was making bank. He had 3 daughters and finally a son - my dad.
My dad was a slacker through and through. My grandfather knew this but had advise all his kids to marry wealthy. My 3 aunt's married wealthy and all still live in that mid 7 figure lifestyle.
My dad married my mom (a farmer) and had me and my siblings.
We immigrated to Canada and still made bank. Definitely loved comfortably up until my grandfather passed. Then my parents got divorced and my dad had custody of us.
He left the country and took my 2 siblings with him. Dumped them in a boarding school and left me with relatives in Canada.
At this point my mom had already gone off and was doing her own thing. Many relationships and my dad had dried up all the inheritance with his lavish spending.
I'm talking straight out of a movie. He had girlfriends that he gifted vehicles, luxury clothes, etc to. Meanwhile I started working at 16 so I could afford lunch because my relatives didn't care about me.
My dad has still told me to this day that I should engage with wealthy people and marry back into wealth.
She Got Nothing
I have an older relative who lived in luxury, her husband took care of everything and she was living in different countries every other year and had mansions.
That must've made her think she was invincible because she f*cked some other dude and had his kid. Her husband wanted at least loyalty from her - so he divorced her.
She got nothing, she now lives in the boonies and the only thing that reminds her of the previous lifestyle is the engagement ring she lied about losing.
Her baby daddy actually took custody of the kid and raised him well.
The husband has never contacted her or her family, believing they hid the affair from him.
Reichpogromnacht
My family used to own several apartment buildings and the German equivalent to malls. They were also Jewish.
On the reichspogromnacht (1938, the Night where the Nazis staged a "people's uprising" against the Jews. Most rioters and looters weren't, in fact, angry Germans but SS and SA dressed in normal civilian clothing) they were having dinner with friends as were therefore not at home when the Nazis raided and burned their house.
They paid a Taxi driver to to drive my grandfather through Berlin for the rest of the night while looting, murdering, and the first deportations were happening and went back to the friends place they were having dinner at. The next day, all property was seized by the nazis, the bank accounts taken, the house robbed and partially burned.
They took the last bit they had, bought jewelry, fled to the Netherlands and went to America.
- MeMphi-S
War Reparations
My great great grandfather was the mayor of Prague (twice) as well as a successful lawyer, and my great grandmother owned several hotels where wealthy people would holiday on the Mediterranean.
Then Czechoslovakia turned communist and the government told her they would seize everything and she could leave or they would seize everything and she could stay.
She left and came to Australia. My grand parents and mother too.
Apparently there are letters from various war reparations departments in Europe suggesting that we may or may not have returned monies awaiting collection.
However since my grandmother and great grandmother have passed on, the chain of providence is getting thinner. Not to mention the costs of getting translators and lawyers involved just to find out if there even is anything of value in there.
Could be several hundred thousand euros, could be several euros. But since we can't even travel to Czech Republic at the moment there is no way to know
- W2ttsy
A New Roommate
When my dad left my mom for someone twenty years younger. My dad was hoping my mom would let her move in with us.
If you or someone you know is struggling, you can contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255).
To find help outside the United States, the International Association for Suicide Prevention has resources available at https://www.iasp.info/resources/Crisis_Centres/
I'm a smart person. I read, I study, I comprehend. But certain types of math can send me to the funny farm. I tried trigonometry in high school. I needed a therapist after a week. My brain hates math. It is what it is. I give up trying.
Louder!
Meme Reaction GIF by reactionseditorGiphy"I can't comprehend why any company would think I'm more likely to buy their product if they make their commercial 20db louder than all other commercials. Instant boycott."
The Scale
"The sheer size and scale of the universe. Like the fact that you can fit all the planets of the Solar System between the Earth and the Moon. Now realise how far apart all the planets are in the Solar System. This is practically next door compared to the distance between our Sun and the nearest star."
"There are billions of stars in our Milky Way (with the majority having planets of their own). The sheer scale of the vast emptiness involved means that even when our galaxy merges with the Andromeda galaxy in 4.5 billion years' time, there will be very, very few actual collisions between stars."
"Then there is the void between galaxies, and that it takes billions of years for light, at its speed (massless, and the fastest speed possible), to travel between galaxies, speaks of the sheer emptiness and distance in that void. I can't quite fathom it."
The Before...
"What was there before the universe, what was there before that, and that and that and (you get the idea)."
"The problem is we are using English words that have implied meanings that are familiar to humans on everyday experience to describe events that are outside everyday experience."
"Before" implies that time exists on both sides of an event, but that is not true when we are talking about the universe. Like how there are no positive numbers less than 0, there are no times before the beginning of the universe."
In the Words...
"Language, the fact that we all collectively decided separately and divertingly that certain sounds have meanings and that other sound mixed with those can change the meaning."
"Thanks for all of the upvotes and the award :3."
"Adding onto what I said, sounds are just vibrations in the air that out brains interpret into the sensation of hearing. Really we're vibrating the air at each-other and those air vibrations to your brain contain meaning. When you think about it like this language is not too dissimilar to the internet in a way. Makes you realize how crazy and unique of a skill language really is, with-ought it we wouldn't have a civilization."
"Another interesting thing related to this is when people call your name. Even if your in a crowded area with hundreds of people talking around you and you think your tuning them out if you hear your name you immediately notice, Some part of your brain must be constantly listening."
"Here are some other things my mind can't quite grasp:
- Computers, the fact that my phone is performing countless mathematical operations constantly.
- the plank length, if I understand it right it's the smallest distance anything can move, like a pixel of space.
- the human body and animals in general, were a collection of (large number but idk how large) cells all working together in various systems some how sustaining a brain that is able to be conscious, it's a miracle animals work at all let alone what they're capable of.
- why my ankles crack when I walk.
- what the future will be like, the world is changing so fast it's likely the future will be nothing like we think and it's coming." - Flaer15
I'm Empty
Fun Floating GIF by Tomas BrunsdonGiphy"My little brain can't comprehend the vast emptiness of space and the fact it supposedly just stretches on forever and never has an end. Kind of wild when you try imagine it."
Like any other muscle or organ in the body, we have to listen when pain is inflicted. We have to recognize discomfort and deal. Why don't we allow the same respect to our brain? It will tell us when enough is enough.
Simplicity...
Work Working GIFGiphy"How a simple calculator works. I can do math. I'm actually very good at it. How does a little plastic box do it though? Always boggled my mind."
Dammit!
"Dates. I am considered a historian by my family due to my knowledge on most world history, but God dang dates... I could be talking about WWII and say it happened the same date as WWI."
Billions of People
"That all the others persons I talk to or see, have their own thoughts, own inner dialogue and own life. For gaming analogy sometimes I just feel like others are NPC and I just can't comprehend that there are more than 7 billions person just like me."
"Sonder...
The profound feeling of realizing that everyone, including strangers passed in the street, has a life as complex as one's own, which they are constantly living despite one's personal lack of awareness of it."
Now That's Too Much!
"Quantum physics."
"I have a PhD in astronomy and MSc in Physics, and had to take ~2 years worth of quantum mechanics courses. It's one of those things where you can take solace that even with all that education on it all I can say is no one else really understands it either."
And the Dark?
"Light isn't affected by time. So... other things could just exist outside of time? Like, if you were a photon that traveled at light speed for a million years and then hit an alien's third butt, you'd experience it as instantly being a million light years away."
- Delica
"A photon moves at the speed of light through space, but is standing still in time."
"A person at rest moves at the speed of light through time, but is standing still in space. When you accelerate through space, you're simultaneously decelerating through time. That's why observers will see your clock slow down when you begin accelerating at relativistic speeds. It's referred to as time and space dilation. Makes more sense once you realize that."
The Process...
"There are people who don't have an internal dialogue with themselves. So, they never question if they are right or wrong. They never wonder if they are treating someone fairly, or if they are nice or mean."
"They can change their minds with no information, but it doesn't involve the process most of us go through when confronted with an opinion, or new data. It's not common, but it's not entirely rare. When I learned about this, I just couldn't understand how it was even possible."
The End
Season 2 Episode 10 GIF by The SimpsonsGiphy"Death, obviously I understand why people die and all that but just thinking what happens afterwards. What's it like for the said person that died, is it just blackness? Is it like they're dreaming??? Reincarnation?? This probably sounds very stupid but I don't care 🤦🏻♀️🤷🏻♀️"
There is so much to learn, and even more that we'll never know. And that's ok. When the brain is full, it's full. Seems like just a part of life. The mysteries will sometimes stay illusive.
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I wanted to give up, I was flustered and spent way too much time trying to get a great grade in a class that just wasn't clicking for me. What did I do? I had to take a step back and reflect on what I would tell a friend in the same shoes. I would tell them they don't need to be perfect, that getting a C+ in one class wasn't going to wreck their whole GPA, and for the love of God drink water too won't just coffee.
Self-care and stealing extra sleep, even just an hour nap, can go a long way to refreshing your drive. The takeaway really was just to show me the same love and support I'd been putting out to those around me. You deserve it, too!
Redditor peachyjams asked:
"What are some tips for a burnt out student?"
The Reddit community gave this user some wonderful tips and tricks to help with student burnout.
Go at your own pace.
“Don't pressure yourself into 4 years. It's OK to take it slower. Balance out your schedule with more enjoyable elective credits if you can, or just take less courses in a semester if possible.”
“Obviously things like financial aid, living costs (if not living at home) and others may play a factor in how many courses you need to take or how quickly you need to complete college, so if you can't take less courses, talk to your advisor or counselor and work with them to carefully plan out each semester so that your coursework is balanced IE: You don't end up accidentally taking Calculus + "Fun," art class that was 1000x more work than you thought it would be in the same semester.”~zachtheperson
“Burnt out doesn't begin to cover it.”
“I feel very qualified to answer this. I have been in college continuously since I was 18, and I'm now 32. I have 2 years to go before finishing my doctorate. I currently have an associate's, bachelor's, and master's. I have also worked the entire time. Burnt out doesn't begin to cover it. Here is how I stay sane:
- Give school as little bandwidth in your life as possible. "Good enough" are the two most beautiful words in the English language. Get Bs on things. Write your assignments and due dates on a master calendar, block off times to get them done, and try to avoid thoughts of school outside of those blocks.
- To increase productivity during your work blocks, use Freedom or something similar. I paid for a lifetime subscription and in one class alone it paid for itself. It just blocks access to your distractions on the phone and computer while you get stuff done.
- Tackle other hobbies in life that you see progress in outside of school. Even if it feels like school will never ever end and you're on a treadmill of misery going nowhere, you can go somewhere in other areas of your life. I'm currently training for a marathon, just started learning cello, I mentor first gen college students, and I'm in a book club. Pick your poison, but try to put away the laptop and push yourself in a non-academic area.
- Your social needs may vary, but try getting together with other people not in your circle of school misery. Join a sports league (yuck for me but maybe not for you). I host regular dinner parties. Volunteer. Now that vaccines are out, make sure you get one then connect with other people.
- DO NOT TAKE A BREAK. When you stop school even for a semester you know what it's like to be happy and not have the weight of misery pulling you down. You won't want to go back. Slog through and just do it.
- Don't reward yourself with damaging things. Don't eat or drink your rewards for school or you will be unhealthy and unhappy when you're done. Reward yourself with something positive instead."
If I had to recommend one book, it would be 'Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle'. Basically, it goes into the science of feeling burned out, why it's bad for you, and how to fix it on a physiological level."
“If you don't want to read the whole thing, if I could distill the most useful information it would be: exercise. The author digs deep into the science (which I love) behind why it works SO DAMN GOOD, but if you hate science and reading, trust me. Go for a run a few times a week, lift weights, dance a lot, just get your heart rate up. Good luck. School sucks."~bicycle_mice
You don’t have to be perfect.
walking dead love GIFGiphy“If you're an A student I would suggest lowering your personal bar. Being constantly burnt out isn't worth the 0.2 difference in your GPA and if you're worried about career prospects there are always comparable fields that aren't quite as competitive.”
“Trying to get an A in every class takes disproportionally more work. If you can get A's and a few more B's while getting to chill every once and a while and not stressing, do that.”~SlightlyOvertuned
Lists are seriously underrated.
If your sensation is of being overwhelmed (i.e. you have an impossible amount of work to do with no end in sight) more than burnt out (you are exhausted and becoming detached from the work), then two tips:
- Realise that it's not infinite. If you stick it out until graduation (and I hope you do!), then many of the problems you're accumulating will be wiped clear. Perhaps your GPA/final grade won't be as good as you want, but remember that whatever you're facing now - this too shall pass. Knowning that there is an inevitable light at the end of the tunnel is useful for me.
- Make a list. If you are the under-organised type, making a list of things to do each morning on a sheet of paper dramatically reduces the stress level that those items cause you. You can implement some fancy to-do software if you prefer but tbh a daily todo is simpler and more effective...”~alexandicity
A book and a blanket? Make it so.
read new york GIFGiphy“When I was a burnt out student I took solace in a comfort zone activity. Something unrelated to my school work that I could dive into for a little while when I needed a break. For me, this was reading the Lord of the Rings.”
“What works for you depends one what's in your comfort zone, but it should be something that you can easily pick up and put down again when it is time to get back to work.”
“To this day, I still read the Lord of the Rings when I get stressed or overworked. In fact, I am reading it now, for the 48th time.”~khendron
Healthy Routines...
“Lots of things you could try! Sleep. 8 hours a day, wake up spontaneously without an alarm and if you feel the need do a 30-90 minute power nap in the afternoon.”
“Meditate daily, 5-30 minutes to start in the morning or whenever you feel comfortable. Limit the consume of caffeine.”
“Plan a healthy diet you can stick to, reducing the amount of junk food first to focus later on the composition of your main meals, snacks and so on. Eat plenty of greens, fruit, nuts and drink mainly water or sugar free drinks.”
“Take cold showers. Those are a huge boost, especially in the morning. Decompress. As someone said, take the days you need to just do nothing during your week. Last but not least, workout! Start small, build the habit and stick to it!“~Tha_Sin
“...it's pretty normal in our over worked society.”
“Burnout is real. It means you have given too much of yourself to something, and you need to recover. While deadlines don't wait, professors often will. “
“You have to communicate with them if you are struggling. If they are worth their pay, they will do their best to accommodate you. It's unhealthy to continue under so much stress. Be kind to yourself.”
“Nearly everyone experiences this at some point in life, and it's pretty normal in our over worked society. Do what you can to clear your mind. Assign yourself a certain number of hours to completely shift gears away from all these responsibilities.”
“Set an alarm if you have to, but give yourself enough time to reach a stage of full body relaxation. You can try walking, meditating, sleeping, whatever your body needs. Just listen to it! There is no shame here. You must care for yourself and keep a balance. Deep breaths, often.”~VaginaWarrior
“Yes to this advice!! Let teachers know ASAP that you are struggling and often they will be able to make accommodations or offer help. Also, looking into counseling services that are offered through the school is definitely worth taking advantage of while that stuff is accessible and free.”~shannonbta
“because a b*tch needs water...”
“My bad day thing is I have to get up, eat (even if it's takeout), put on fresh bedsheets because if I'm having a bad day in bed it might as well be comfortable and smell good, have a shower (even just shoulders down) and go for even a small walk, even if it's to the shop or to get myself that takeout."
“They're not huge things to do but they're very difficult on some days. And I don't always do them all, maybe I just eat and shower, or go for a walk, or just change my bedsheets. But all of them are small tasks that feel like mountains but once I do one or two of them they're so so easy, and I benefit from them all mentally or physically or both."
“And I have a litre bottle of water and cup of tea at my side at all times because a b!tch needs water and there are few things as comforting as a good cup of tea in a warm mug to me."~thisisausername-2021
“I didn't pull a single all-nighter in my 4 years of undergrad.”
- “Don't listen to your fellow classmates who boast about study 60+ hours a week, they're either exaggerating, straight-up lying, or have an incredibly inefficient study method. There will be times where you really need to be studying hard for extended amounts of time (ex. finals week), but for the vast majority of the semester it is completely unnecessary to do that in order to get a good grade.”
- “If you do find that you need excessive study in order to do okay in a course then you need to reach out to your TA(s) and professor. Most universities have free tutoring services, use them.”
- “Seriously just take more breaks and get more sleep. I didn't pull a single all-nighter in my 4 years of undergrad and now that I'm in med school I don't have any need for that either. Without real breaks and sleep your brain's ability to actually store and organize all the information you've studied goes out the window. This is harder to do if you need to work to support yourself but you need to find some semblance of healthy sleeping habits if you want to be able to make it through all 4 years.”
- “Eat real food. Don't just live off of snack foods and coffee, your brain isn't going to work properly if you don't fuel it. It's generally cheaper to buy canned and frozen fruit and veg so if you're on a budget try those aisles. Additionally, most places have some sort of charity or community pantry/soup kitchen, use it if you need to.You don't need to be completely destitute in order to reach out for help from these places, if you are struggling to make ends meet get help from your community. It is not weak, it is not shameful, it's being smart enough to accept that everyone needs help now and then.”
- “I mean it, don't pay attention to classmates and social media influencers who say they spend all their time studying. They almost definitely aren't and if they are they have an unsustainable view towards work/school that will bite them in the butt later on.”~JSD12345
Treat yourself to a mini-vacation.
“If you have any extra money (I know, easier said than done) book the cheapest AirBNB you can find within the area you can get to with the transportation you have available. Go alone or bring a friend, and have a mini-vacation, just for a night or weekend. It's very refreshing to have a change of scenery, even if it's in your same city.”~goshawkgirl
These are some great ideas to help cope with the all to real burnout. Remember to show yourself the grace you give to others because your best is all you can do.
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