Having lots and lots of money is wonderful. Having very little money is really stressful and terrible.
But apparently it's a little more complicated than that. Once poor, now wealthy Redditors weighed in with some truths about what happens when money starts rolling in. Spoiler: "Mo money, mo problems" is totally a real thing but money is also really cool because you can buy helpful stuff.
u/dondrizzius asked: Rich people of Reddit that were poor before, how did money solve your problems and what new problems have appeared?
​Through the Cracks.Â
Went through childhood in the foster system and fell through the cracks, ended up homeless a few times. Anyways I am not a 1%er but I do make more than 80% of Americans (yearly salary wise).
Money relieved me of stress. When I go shopping I don't check my bank account before I make a purchase, I have insurance so I am not afraid to go to the dentist or doctor, going out with friends is fun because I know I won't be financially struggling from a night out. It ultimately bought me a level of stability I never was used to and I am incredibly grateful.
My 'new problems' I wouldn't call problems, home maintenance, car upkeep, bills, etc. I am grateful those are my main worries these days. SpookyCritter
Downside:
I can now buy good gifts for my friends/family.
Downside: now I cant get them crappy gifts. WhiteHairedWidow
Just poor....
Not rich currently but due to my work skills I have been both flush with cash and scraping by. This position changes every so often.
When I had excess, forget it level of money, my immediate needs were taken care of so I could focus on other things/take on new projects.
People don't realize that when you don't have to worry about:
- Food for the next month(s)
- Basic household bills for the next month(s)
- Fuel for the car
you are so free to spend your energy on other projects and learn new things.
For me, the issues that having that much disposable income is the temptation to spend it. Lifestyle creep and keeping up with the Jones' will destroy people if the cash flow ever gets interrupted. Without that cash flow you can't afford you mortgage or your new car. I avoided it, luckily. Many others have not.
I bought a small house and a nice 15 year old truck when I had the money and then I stopped. I put my money in the bank/invested it. My monthly stay alive cost is under 1K. When the good times end, I still keep the lights on working a low paying job. Routine_Condition
​Fawning service industry people.
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Fawning service industry people. Waitstaff, hotel, retail store people. It's embarrassing sometimes because I don't know how to react.
I have a sister who is middle class and three kids. I'm relied on to provide certain expensive things for the kids. Once in a while is fine. It's fun. But because I have no kids, she thinks there should be a constant stream of fun activities and gifts coming from me because "what else are you spending your money on." the-camster
 I can go to whole foods.....
Grew of middle class, until 12 years old, then mom had a stroke and parents lost family business and was essentially piss poor broke. I think parents sheltered my brother's and I from it a lot. Always had something to eat but always moving around different homes, xmas presents consisted of socks, underwear and candy bars. It sucked during high school. I was jealous. Went to college, got a job, and so did my brother's. My brothers started doing well and started supporting our parents. I ended up going to med school. Getting through residency. Still paying off massive loans but now in a place where I don't have to worry about my car breaking down, I can go to whole foods, I can buy friends and family dinner without thinking about it. I can pay for my parents dental work without thinking too much about it.
I can invest in stocks, invest in a good home, maintain the home and my cars and even make money on my house by investing correctly.
The biggest difference is that. Now I can make financial decisions that on their own make money for me, with real estate and with investing. And the ratio of this easy capital games money only gets better every year.
When you are poor you own nothing and the only way of making money is to work but if your paycheck cant support your lifestyle it is very difficult to break cycle. gnfknr
Payoffs....
We weren't really that poor but we lost a good part of our income and the biggest problem is I cant spend money without stressing about how many hours I will have to work to pay it off. AdaLovelaceKing
The 1%...
Not "rich" by 1% standards, never been "poor" (I always had a support system, even if I had no money myself).
That being said, the number one thing I noticed is holidays aren't as stressful, because money isn't an issue. Shopping for presents is relatively easy, because I'm limited by creativity, not weighing "how ashamed am I going to be to give this crappy gift to someone vs how much do I want to eat this week."
The main problems come from being in that place where "enough" is never enough. As long as I watch my spending, I can mostly buy the occasional thing I want, but I don't have enough that I can buy "whatever." It's also a dilemma when it comes to helping out my friends. I don't have enough that I can afford to solve (or really significantly impact) my friends financial problems, while at the same time I want to be generous/helpful when I can.
On the gripping hand, it becomes easy to be taken for granted or even worse, taken advantage of. Springing for the occasional meal can easily become being expected to pay for restaurants that are more expensive than I want to be going to in the first place. You want to nip that crap in the bud real quick.
But I have a lot of friends who are literally looking through couch cushions for gas money. At the same time, if I gave them gas money all the time, I wouldn't be able to pay my own bills. So it sucks to sit there and have to figure out when I can actually help vs when I'm lighting myself on fire to keep someone else warm. JesterBarelyKnowHer
Missing You Much...
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Kinda the opposite here, was fairly wealthy living in a large single family home, now living in a 250 sqft trailer. The biggest thing is probably not having the time to be able to enjoy ourselves. Working 7 days a week just to make ends meet isn't fun. Before, we could go anywhere on a whim and not have to worry about missing out on the money.
It. Is. Heaven.
It is hard to overstate the joy of having a RELIABLE car, with gas, with insurance, that I just take to a guy if something needs to be fixed. It isn't brand new or fancy, it's just a car I can trust.
It. Is. Heaven.
New problem; my nieces and nephews hit me up for money whenever they have some sort of travel event they found that they want to go on. Sometimes the answer is no and that often causes hard feelings. picksandchooses
Stay Calm...
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Can't say I'm rich but for my age (22) I'm wealthy. I always had to think a lot before buying anything, having money makes it much easier. I don't have to say no to my friends when they invite me for something because I don't have the money, always so embarrassing.
Still I'm always afraid I lose it again and I end up being poor again. It's a constant anxiety. xDariius
One thing I can say for sure though is I will never take normal things for granted ever again. How I miss having a dishwasher and a clothes washer and counter space. I miss having an oven big enough for a tray of cookies. I miss having more than one bathroom in the house. If I were to ever have these things again, I'd never ever look at them how I did before, I'd be eternally more grateful than I ever had been. Reddit
Necessary, not sufficient
In the German language there is a saying that goes: "Geld macht nicht glücklich, aber es beruhigt ungemein." It translates to: "Money doesn't make you happy, but it calms you down immensely." It seems to be really true.
There's no going back..
Money allows me to not worry. It doesn't make me happy, but it frees up my mind to BE happy, because I don't have to spend time worrying about how I'm going to pay the next bill.
Lifestyle creep is a very real thing, if you're looking for a "problem." We've gotten used to this level of money, so if it were to go away, it would be a pretty big problem pretty quickly. Our bills have risen along with our income.
I can now buy good gifts for my friends/family.
Downside: now I cant get them shi**y gifts
Just never seems to be enough...
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I can afford the good toilet paper now. The only problem is, I'm still not rich enough to have someone wipe for me.
Outta the woodwork
What new problems have appeared: people suddenly become very friendly if they need money and they stop being friendly if you don't loan them (more). Also loans are gifts in their head.
I am in a similar boat. Trying to help my sister out of credit card debt, I have been buying them groceries. Hoping they would put the money onto the credit card. Later I learned with all the money they had "saved", her husband went out and "invested" in some new trading cards. However i try and help family it always seems to backfire.
Easy, but not simple
If you obtain a large sum of money in a vacuum (metaphorically, not in a Dyson) then yeah having money is not a bad thing and can't be construed as such. The reality though is that generally large amounts of wealth are obtained through a huge amount of work which almost assuredly brings problems. That being said, problems like work/life balance, managing people and so on would be preferable for almost anyone over wondering how you are going to pay your rent or bills next month.
The long con is doable
Basically, money is a safety net. I feel like I can buy my way out of problems fairly easily. Also, not being poor bring economy of scale on everything... like, I can cook a meal for 4 adults with $7 because I have all the staples in my pantry.
NO MORE BRATS
I have to make sure my kids aren't entitled little brats and don't grow up to be entitled, awful adults.
License to chill
Went from extremely lower middle class (where I didn't carry insurance because I couldn't afford it, and could never pay all my bill in any given month) to 1%er. The biggest difference is bar none the loss of that fear and shame. My wife is an incredibly empathetic sympathetic person but she came from money and doesn't understand the feeling. The stress, shame, and sleeplessness that comes from not having money just can't be explained unless you've lived them. Not having that feeling, just knowing I can buy what I want (with in reason, don't confuse the 1% with the .01%) is one of the greatest changes in my life. Having come from almost nothing to where I'm at now there are no problems. The problems I face now are totally first world problems, because money.
Level up to Robinhood powers
I can give now. We support youth development causes in our town, but more importantly, we pay "scholarships." This is when you are signing your kid up for something cool, and you pay 2-4 times the amount, so the poorer kids can do it too. This was my childhood. My best friend was rich, but his parents really respected mine, and they also loved me. Every cool thing that came up that I knew I couldn't afford turned out to be just "free!" My friends mom paid double for everything, and neither I or my parents ever knew until she had passed.
Try not to follow the bad advice given here, because you don't want to get the results that these guys did.
U/Duckerton375 asked: What's the worst advice someone ever gave you, but you still followed?
The workplace can bring a cornucopia of terrible advice. Don’t follow these unless you want to get fired.
​Bad jobs are usually not worth it.
Stick with a job no matter how bad it is. I stayed with a terrible job working retail, dealing with horrible customers and sexual harassment. I was told I wouldn't find anything better.
"No, no, you misunderstand. I said you wouldn't find anything better at making you feel like complete garbage."
This gets really creepy really fast.
frustrated workplace GIFGiphy"After you put in a job application, you need to call them at least once a day every day until they hire you."
Note: this did not get me hired. It got me called out by the HR person I was calling and forbidden to ever contact their facility again.
I work for a law firm that employees over 1500 people in the home office alone. Once I received a call from the building security saying, "Insert Name is here to speak with the owner." Well we are run by a committee so that's odd. Found out they just applied for a job and wanted to talk directly to the person that would potentially hire them. Told him the firm will contact them to schedule an interview. They refused to leave without "talking to the owner." Had security escort them out of the building.
​This is absolutely not true.
"Sleep is for people who do not want success" great words from my uncle, it almost killed me.
Now I may be oversleeping.
​Interpersonal relationships are also a big breeding ground for terrible advice. Don’t listen to any of these.
Heartbreaking.
My father always tought me and my brother that "having friends is bad and in the end they will never be there for you" so everytime I told my father about my friends he would get kinda mad and give me the advice to stop talking to them.
Now I am afraid of people and have several trust issues, thanks dad.
​This won’t end well.
A Christmas Story GIF by filmeditorGiphyIn the fifth grade my teacher was talking about bullying, then she said "if anyone tries to bully you just agree with them." So the next time I got bullied I agreed with the bully and they bullied me more.
Dude one time I saw an anti bullying video that told the victims to just BE NICE TO THE BULLY. Like the bully was hurling insults and the victim was smiling and complimenting him. My first thought was about how much I hated the mere thought that this would work. My second thought was of how the people who came up with that method had clearly never been bullied.
​Oof.
When I met my now wife at the age of 19, one of my coworkers said that it's very important to start at the bottom with presents and work your way up, she still has the socks I gave her on our first anniversary on the wall over our bed as a reminder...
I'm still trying to teach my boyfriend about good presents and bad presents. Biscuits from the supermarket = bad present. Cheap unbranded laptop battery from China as my only present = bad present (and only lasted 2 months). Anything off my 7-page wishlist = good present. It's literally a list of things I want to receive as presents.
​Can tell you from experience that this is a bad idea.
Had a falling out with some friends. My husband recommended I reach out to an old friend who ghosted me suddenly in a manner that induced some pretty severe abandonment trauma. Went for it anyways because "it's been so long, surely they changed". Am now experiencing the same things as last time.
When you follow bad advice, it can lead to mistakes that you just can’t come back from.​
Buying a house is tricky.
for sale dancing GIF by Lisa VertudachesGiphy"Buy a home now before the prices go up!" -my FIL in 2006.
We bought in 2007 and paid $259,500 for our 1,300 sq ft house (we really couldn't afford it and had an 80/20 so we had 8% interest for one loan and 6% on the other) and in 2008 it was worth $97,000 so refinancing wasn't even an option. We watched all of our neighbors walk away or get foreclosed on but we kept paying our bills and as of this very moment our house is worth $462,000. I'm so happy we stuck it out, we both worked our @sses off and the house will be paid off in 2 years.
It worked out for us, it's a horrible idea. Especially since 1300 sq ft houses are $460+k
My heartbreaks for future generations, I honestly don't know how people are going to afford housing in the future.
It’s there for a reason.
"Never apply for any government assistance."
Cue years of suffering trying to work full-time with a painful disability. Quit a particularly terrible job, and wanted to apply for food aid until I could find another gig; a friend with lots of DHS experience recommended I apply for Social Security "just to get in the system." Turns out my disability was bad enough to get accepted the first time, which I wasn't expecting. Really could've used that support, oh, the 30+ previous years of my life.
Credit is important to have.
I was told to not get a credit card until after college. I was super fortunate to have my college paid for so I had no loans, car paid in cash, no credit card or anything to start building credit. Found myself out in the world at 22 years old with a credit score of 0.
So while a lot of this bad advice came from trusted people, oftentimes they were too misinformed to give that advice in the first place. Don't trust the word of one person--do your research, and make decisions for yourself.
It'll be way better in the long run